John D. MacDonald The Second Chance

The blue-and-silver bus shouldered its way through the brawling, irritable traffic of the big Midwestern city. It turned slowly off a narrow street into the covered ramp of the terminal, and in the enclosure the heavy motor sounded louder. Lew Barry stood up, his tall hard body cramped from too many miles. The pest beside him stood up too, flashing his eager, terrier smile.

“Like I was saying, Champ, if you was to try a comeback now, you couldn’t pick a better time. The division is full of bums. I know you the minute I lay eyes on you. Even if it is five years. I sure’d like to see you back in there.”

Lew had endured the chatter uncomplainingly. In a sense it had helped. It had kept him from thinking too much about what was waiting, from wondering too much and too long. Lew was a big man in his middle thirties, and he showed the indelible marks of sixty-three professional fights: Brown hair thinned by the arcs. Brows and lips thickened and white-laced. Big hands broken and mended too many times. The thickness of brows made his clear blue eyes look small, sunken, cold and remote. But he still carried his weight high, in chest and neck and shoulders, and moved his body with spare, effortless economy.

“It’s been too long, friend,” he said in his soft husky voice. “Too long. They’d knock my ears off.”

“Aw, they don’t punch any more, Champ.”

“I never did get that title, friend.”

“On you it would sound good, Champ. You got a trucking business now, so maybe that’s better. Maybe it’s a lot better. But a guy can dream. I’ll never forget that second Louis fight. Never.”

“He killed me,” Lew said, smiling.

“But he didn’t knock you out. Nobody ever knocked you out.”

They stood beside the bus and he shook hands with the little man, and when the bags were unloaded from the compartment in the side of the bus, he surrendered his ticket and took his bag and walked into the waiting-room, feeling in his pocket for change for the phone. The phones were at the far end; as he walked toward them she appeared suddenly in front of him, and she looked the way she had looked in all the dreams of the past five years — a tall woman with a look of clean integrity, with an odd inner radiance that glowed in fine gray eyes.


She kissed his cheek lightly and quickly and stood back, her hands tight just above his wrists, a faint glimmer of tears in her eyes. “Lew, bless you!”

“It’s... good to see you, Ivy. I didn’t expect you to meet me.”

“The car’s outside. Your wire said you’d get in about three. I checked the planes and trains and buses. If you didn’t come in on that bus, I was going over to the railroad station to meet the three-ten from the East.”

They went out into the bright warm sunshine. She walked beside him in the remembered way, her stride long and good.

“How’s Jack?”

“He’s fine, Lew. Anxious to see you, of course. I’ll let him tell you what’s on his mind.”

The car was a chartreuse convertible with dealer’s plates. She said, “I’d better drive, Lew. It’s tricky finding your way out of town.”

While she was concentrating on traffic, moving deftly through the openings, he half-turned in the seat to look at her. The same Ivy or almost the same. Now there were perceptible lines at the corners of her eyes, a look of strain around her mouth, a trace of gauntness in her figure. In the sunlight he saw white hairs in the jet hair, just a few above her car. Time goes by and things change. And he couldn’t let himself think of her as Ivy Brownell. She was Mrs. Terrance now, Mrs. Jack Terrance, even if he couldn’t rid himself of the pointless dreams.

After many turns through narrow streets, she turned left onto a broad boulevard. “There!” she said, relaxing a bit. “It’s simple from now on. Jack’s sorry he couldn’t meet you. He should be back at the house by five, he said. Lew, why didn’t you ever write?”

“I’m not much of a hand at letters, Ivy.”

“But you’ve left us both in the dark. We don’t know anything about you any more, except that you went into the trucking business. Did you get married?”

“No time for it, Ivy.”

“How is the business going?”

“Fine,” he said heartily. “It took a while to get established. Things are okay now.” He wondered if he had sounded too confident. Ivy had always been able to tell, somehow, when he was lying. Business was dandy. Got up to five rigs a year and a half ago. Then two of them were gone within one week. One rolled down the slope of a Pennsylvania mountain and was pounded into junk, crippling the driver. One was smacked head-on by a drunk in a big Cad, killing both drivers and burning the rig. That eight-balled the best contract, and the bank took back the biggest, newest outfit. Somehow, after that streak of bad luck, he hadn’t been able to climb back. Maintenance took too big a chunk of the gross. He’d driven one and Whitey the other, on a killing schedule, never getting ahead. And then the wire had come from Jack Terrance.

NEED HELP AND ADVICE. WANT TO SEE YOU. WIRE TIME OF ARRIVAL.

Very typical of Jack Terrance, he thought. No question of whether it would be convenient or even possible. “Come at once,” and the blithe assurance that you would, that if your old pal Jack needed you, you’d drop everything and come running.

The wire had come at six, and by luck he had been there instead of off on a week-long swing, bidding on the wildcat loads. He had thought of Jack, and thought of Ivy, and thought of the endless ache to see her. And he had gotten drunk for the first time since losing the two rigs in a week, and the next day he had sold out his equity in both rigs, receiving twenty-one hundred dollars. He gave Whitey a month’s pay, settled his own debts, and checked out of the small furnished apartment permanently.

He met Ivy’s quick glance with bland assurance and said, “The business is doing well.”

“I’m glad, Lew. Terribly glad.”


The boulevard led straight into the flatlands, and she turned right toward gentle hills. She suddenly pulled off the road where there was heavy shade. “I want to talk,” she explained.

“Sure,” he said, wondering at the bitterness in her tone.

She tapped a cigarette on the back of her hand. He brought out matches and lit it for her.

“It puts me in a funny spot, Lew,” she said.

“How do you mean?”

“I want to talk to you, yet I don’t want to be disloyal to Jack. The three of us, Lew — we were a good trio. It was fun, while it lasted. You two were my date. Singular. I’ll never know why you walked out, will I?”

“Maybe not.”

“I married Jack.” She touched his hand. “Lew, I don’t regret that. And I know you were in love with me.”

He managed a smile. “Still am.”

“Please! This is hard enough to say without—”

“Sorry, Ivy.”

“Jack is going to ask you something. I promised him I’d let him bring it up, so I can’t tell you what it is. But I can tell you this much, Lew. I don’t approve of his asking you this. It’s too much to ask. He was always able to get around you, to get you to do things for him. You did too much in the past. He’s very clever, Lew. I’m afraid he’s going to make this favor sound as though you would be doing it for both of us. You’re not. If you want to do it, you’re doing it for him, not for me. I personally hope it falls through. But I can’t be loyal to Jack and at the same time ask you to refuse. Because, you see, what he’s going to ask you means a great deal to him.”

“Sounds confusing.”

“It will clear up when he brings it up. Don’t give him an immediate answer; tell him you have to think about it. Then we can find a chance to talk it over, and I’ll explain where I stand. Is that agreed?”

“Yes. I can do that. But it’s been puzzling me a lot. I mean, trying to think of what I could do for him.”

“I don’t think you’ll be happy about it, Lew.”

“It can’t make me mad. It gave me a chance to see you again, Ivy. And see my godson. How is he?”

“Husky and half-spoiled, I’m afraid. Lew, the presents you’ve sent have been too expensive, really. You shouldn’t.”

“They weren’t much.”

She started the car again and they began to pass impressive houses which all looked quite new. Then she turned in at a gravel drive. On the lawn sloped down toward the road sprinklers turned slowly.

“Some ranch,” Lew Barry said.

“Isn’t it, though! All complete, too. With view-windows and a wading pool for Chris and a first mortgage and a second mortgage.” He looked at her tense face with shocked surprise. Her voice had been taut and angry.

“It’s very nice out here,” he said uncertainly.

“Very fashionable, they keep telling me.”

She parked by the garage. They got out and Chris came charging across the lawn, whooping and waving a shining revolver. A teen-age girl followed slowly. Chris charged up to Lew, then suddenly turned shy.

“Chris, this is your Uncle Lew.”

The boy did not speak and Lew picked him up, held him high and grinned at him, then tucked him under one arm. The boy began to writhe and yell with pleasure. It was painful fantasy to Lew to think that this solid warm wriggling kid could have been his and Ivy’s — a part of each of them. Flesh of her flesh, and thus inexpressibly precious.

The girl said, “Mrs. Terrance, I got to go now, but I phoned Mother and she said I could be back at seven. You want I should eat before I come?”

“Yes, dear. We’re going out to dinner. I’ll have Chris all fed, of course, and it will be bedtime for him.”

“Will it be okay if I have a girl friend come with me?”

“Certainly, Mary. And Mr. Terrance will drive you both home.”

“Chris had a pretty short nap.”

The girl was introduced to Lew; then she went off across the fields behind the house. Ivy said, “She lives on a farm a half-mile away. She’s a darling. Sitters are at a premium out here. School let out last week and Mary will be available all summer. She’s good with Chris.”


Ivy took him into the house and showed him his room, while Chris stomped circles around them. She told him to come out to the pool when he had freshened up and there’d be a Tom Collins waiting for him.

The room was bright and clean and pleasant, and the small private bath was done in shades of green. The two windows looked out across the gentle hills. When he went out Ivy was sitting near the wading pool. Chris was trying to drown a rubber duck. Lew sat on one of the red enameled chairs across the round metal table from her, picked up his drink and sipped it. It was tart and good.

She said, “You haven’t changed, Lew.”

“Five years. Everything changes.”

“Not you. You’re too durable. Too tough, Lew.”

The shadows were getting a bit longer. In the silence he could hear distant traffic, hear the sound of a brook in the ravine at the end of the yard.

“Jack has changed,” she said suddenly.

He could think of nothing to say. Car tires complained on asphalt and then the gravel of the drive crunched and popped under the wheels. Chris took his attention from the rubber duck and looked quickly toward the station wagon which had driven in. His face was quite still. He returned his glance to the duck and drowned it again.

They got up as Jack Terrance climbed heavily out of the station wagon and came across the yard toward them, grinning expansively. Five years had been unkind to him. The years had widened his body, coarsened his features. He had a cigar clamped in his teeth.

“Well, well, well,” he said, pumping Lew’s hand, punching him on the shoulder, looking hard at him. “By God, you look good, fella. Really good!”

“Nice to see you, Jack.”

“Appreciate the way you cut loose and came out here, fella.” He took the cigar from his mouth; pecked at Ivy’s cheek, replaced the cigar and stood beside his wife. He was beaming at Lew with the pride of ownership, and he had one heavy hand on Ivy’s slim brown arm. “Sorry I had to make a mystery of it this way. Couldn’t be helped. I told Ivy to let me lay the cards on the table. She didn’t jump the gun, did she?” He turned to smile at Ivy, but Lew saw the heavy hand clamp down on her arm, saw the sudden pallor of Jack’s knuckles. There was a quick grimace of pain on Ivy’s mouth. It vanished quickly and she said in a steady voice, “I left it up to you to tell him, darling.”

“Good,” Jack said absently. He frowned over his shoulder at the pool, taking his hand from Ivy’s arm. “Hey, come kiss your daddy, Chris!” he called.

The small boy trudged across the yard, his face cool and composed. For the first time it struck Lew how much the kid looked like Ivy. Chris suffered a kiss and obeyed absently when Jack, squatting, said, “Hug your daddy, boy,” then headed back to the pool. Jack called after him, “No more pool, Chris. Go get yourself dry.”

The boy turned flatly, braced his feet. “I won’t!” he shouted. Lew saw Jack’s face darken. He took two quick steps toward the small boy who stood his ground. But Ivy caught Jack’s arm. She said, “Please. You talk to Lew. I’ll handle it.”



“I don’t know who’s going to teach him to mind if—”

“Please, darling.”

She hurried off, sat on her heels by the boy. She said something in a low tone to the boy. They went off toward the house, hand in hand.

Jack said, “It’s always up to me to discipline him. I have to be the one to fan his tail for him, and he holds a grudge.”

“He’s a good kid.”

“Sure. Best there is. Smart as whips. Come on in while I climb out of these clothes, Lew.”

They went into an obviously masculine bedroom. Jack said, with uncharacteristic shyness, “I got a snore to wake the dead. Ivy had to move out to get some sleep. Sit down. Little knock of Scotch? I keep a bottle here in the closet.”

“Not right now, thanks.”


Jack peeled off his jacket and shirt. His torso was soft, blue-white. He poured himself a drink in a shot glass, downed it, poured another and left the full shot glass on the bureau. He sat on a chair and grunted as he bent over and unlaced his expensive-looking shoes. He pulled the shoes off and sat up with a sigh, wiggling his toes. “It means a hell of a lot to me, Lew, to know that there is one guy in this wide world I can depend on, all the way down the line. But that stuff doesn’t come for free. God, I know that! It works both ways. There are enough double-crossers in this town so you begin to appreciate a real friend when you’ve got one.”

“I guess you better turn the cards face up, Jack.”

Jack gave him a quick, hurt expression. “That doesn’t sound like you, boy. I’m not asking for any handout — get that straight right now. There’s enough in this for you too.”

“I just want to know what it’s all about. I’ve had three days to wonder.”

“Sure, I can understand that. But let me fill in the background for you. Is that okay? I got to show you just what kind of a spot I’m on.”

Lew lighted a cigarette. It had been five years since he had heard the song and dance. It was always something. A big deal, a big angle. And most of them seemed to work, for Jack. Lucky Jack Terrance. “Okay. Fill in the background.”

“You sound like a guy all ready to say no. That’s discouraging. Here’s the deal. In this town you got to have flash, or you’re dead. I took my winnings out of that tanker deal right after I married Ivy and came here and put it into the automobile agency. It’s a good franchise, a money-maker. You’ll have to come down with me in the morning and look around. You’ll see that it’s worth protecting, all right.”

“You about to lose it?”

“That could happen. And it isn’t my fault. Things looked better when I sewed myself up with this house. And of course, you have to belong to clubs. It takes money to live these days. A hell of a lot. And I’ve always felt you got to spend a buck to make a buck. Sports cars are pretty hot these days. About eight months ago I took on a line of them. It was okay with the regular outfit, you know, non-competing. Appeals to a different market. I extended myself. Went into hock to swing it. Then, about six weeks ago, everything went to hell in a bucket. All at once.”

He counted on thick fingers. “One — the steel strike cut my new car deliveries. Two — the bottom fell out of the used-car market. Three — the Bureau of Internal Revenue jumped me with a tax bill for ’47, ’48, ’49 and ’50. It goes way back to those tanker operations, Lew, and it’s a big debt. No question of fraud, you understand. Just a question of interpretation. My lawyers tell me I’m dead. Okay, I scrounged. I mortgaged everything on the floor, everything in the lot, got a second mortgage on this house, sold the kid’s bonds, some jewelry I bought Ivy, and some business property I was holding. The agency is in hock. Man, I’m in hock all the way up to here, and the only thing I was able to buy with all that was time. I go around in circles, wondering what I’m going to do. I can’t borrow any more. I’ve got to make some — make a bundle! And make it fast. I’ve even borrowed to the hilt on insurance. I’m forty, Lew. I can’t let them lick me now. It would be too tough starting over. With you, it’s different; you’re only thirty-three and—”

“Thirty-five, Jack.”

“By God, you don’t look it. Anyway, you’ve got only yourself to look out for, and you got an edge in years. As I say, I was driving myself nuts trying to find some way to get hold of a good piece of money. I was too restless to sit still and worry. I went downtown six weeks ago. They were having a card at the River Stadium, so I wandered over and bought a ringside. Hell, it was like old times. All the prelims were punks. The main was a boy named Sammy Hode. I sat up when I saw that kid. A sweet build. The way he moved, it made me think of you. He was in there against Red Hacklin. He knocked old Red kicking in the fourth. Red could get up, but it was a TKO. I got into the dressing-room afterward and talked to the kid. It was his fourteenth pro bout, and he’s taken twelve by knockouts, and it wasn’t set up for him, either.”


Jack poured himself another shot. His face was flushed with excitement. “By luck, I’ve walked in just right. Sammy is sore at his manager. It’s like this. With the New York crowd, his manager is poison. He’s a little screwball named Morgan. He won’t sell to the New York crowd because he hates them worse than he loves money. The kid had told Morgan he was through. Morgan couldn’t get him good heavies to knock down, and the kid knew he was more than ready for the big time. I started a sales job on the kid and on Morgan. I walked out with a contract. It costs me eight thousand to buy it from Morgan.”

“Where did you get eight thousand?”

“I’m glad you asked me that. I took my reserve — the last dime of it. It left me dead broke for cash.”

“I don’t like what I think is coming, Jack. I don’t like it at all.”

“Now give me a chance, dammit. From the old days I know the New York contacts. The next morning I was on the phone. Yes, they knew of the kid’s record. Yes, he looked like a good boy, but he’d never been up against anybody who counts. You see my idea. I wanted to build the kid further and then unload all of my interest, or a good part of it for a decent profit. I know a good boy when I see one. The best I could get right away was an offer of ten thousand, and that’s no good. That would have given me two thousand which, in my condition, is peanuts. Two weeks ago I matched Sammy with a local. He half killed the guy in the first round. My end was seventeen hundred. I phoned again. They upped it to twelve-thousand-five, which still wasn’t sweet enough. Then, believe me, Lew, right there when I was talking over the phone, I said, right off the top of my head, ‘What if I match him with Lew Barry and the kid wins?”

“Now wait—”


“Let me finish. First they said it couldn’t be done. You’ve been contacted, they said, and you won’t fight. Then they remembered we’re friends. I got a halfway promise. If I can arrange the match, and if we can give it enough publicity, and if the kid wins, they’ll talk in terms of big money. And I mean big, Lew. They’re starving for a colorful heavy. You know that. They’ve got nothing but zombies. Now here it is. The River Stadium, August first. That gives you six weeks to sharpen up enough to make it look good. Your end should be about eight thousand. I don’t know how the odds will figure, but if we want to bet a specific round for a knockout, we can make plenty. When it’s all over, I cut you in on the sale of the kid. There it is, on the line. I don’t want to beg you to do it, Lew. But if you turn me down... well, I don’t mind so much for myself. Ivy and the kid aren’t going to have it so good.”

“I’m out of it,” Lew said hoarsely. “I’ve been out for five years. They’ve all forgotten. It doesn’t mean a damn’ thing if the kid knocks me out.”

“Don’t kid yourself. The public has a long memory. You’re m the record books. And one thing. You’ve been knocked down, but you were never knocked out. That means something to them. It’s a buildup for the kid.”

“I was never knocked out, and I never went in for tank jobs.”

“Wait until you see Sammy go. This won’t be a tank job. The kid can hit.”

“I can’t get back in shape.”

“You’re in shape right now. You look like a rock.”

“You know better than that, Jack. It’s the timing, the reflexes. I can’t get that edge back. It’s gone forever. I quit before they had me talking to myself. No dice, Jack.”

Jack brought the shot glass over and sat on the bed beside Lew. Jack sighed heavily and looked down at the floor between his stockinged feet. He said softly: “When you were up there at the top, I was just a guy hanging around the fringes, Lew. We had a lot of fun, a lot of laughs, you and me and Ivy. Then after that last fight you walked out. You let us read about your retirement in the papers. You know, boy, I always had it figured that you and Ivy— I mean, I was head-over-heels, but you always seemed to have the inside track. That’s the way I had it figured.”

“Drop it!”

“This is something I want to say. I got her on the rebound, Lew. She’s never admitted it, but I know it’s true.”

“I walked out,” Lew said harshly. “That’s right. I walked out. I started saving money too late in the game. What the hell did I know? Nothing but box-fighting. Nothing else in the world. Louis took it out of me. He took all there was left. He came after me, stalking me the way he always used to work, and he got me in a neutral corner and he spoiled me. I didn’t have anything left. She didn’t want a beat-up pug with about eleven thousand bucks to his name, and no way of earning any more unless he let the kids on the way up knock him punchy and blind him and fix him up finally with a tray of dollar ties to sell at two bucks a copy in the Third Avenue bars. So I walked out and she married you — and it was a good thing.”

“It has been a good thing. Correction-past tense. If I can get sixty thousand dollars together, maybe it can keep on being a good thing. But if I don’t, I have to go through bankruptcy and they won’t leave me the proverbial pot. Okay, you won’t fight, you say. Can you raise sixty thousand? Can you mortgage those trucks of yours? Make it forty-eight thousand or so, and I’ll unload the kid for twelve and see if I can work my way out of the hole and pay you back one of these days.”

“I can’t raise that kind of money.”

“Then you have to help me. For Ivy’s sake. For the sake of the kid. I’m like you were in that last Louis fight, Lew. If they lick me now, there’s nothing left.”

He remembered his promise to Ivy. “I’ll think it over. I’ll let you know.”

Jack Terrance brightened up at once. He clapped Lew heavily on the shoulder. “Sure, think it over. Six weeks of easy workouts and about fifteen minutes of mixing it up, and you get eight thousand plus. What the hell, it isn’t like you had a reputation to protect, or you were going after other bouts. This is the last one.”

“I’m not saying I’ll do it.”

“Let’s forget it for tonight. We’ll go out and have some steaks, just the three of us, like old times. We’ll tell lies and get tight, boy. Having you around again is just like a vacation for me, Lew.”


While Jack showered, Lew wandered back through the house. Chris was in his high-chair eating busily and noisily. Ivy sat near him. She looked up at Lew and raised her eyebrows in question.

“He told me,” Lew said heavily.

“It doesn’t mean anything to him that you might be hurt, seriously hurt. All he can think of is getting out of his own jam. He got himself into it. Now it’s up to you to get him out. I sound very loyal, don’t I? The good, loyal little wife! Sometimes I get so damn miserable sick of—” She stopped suddenly, put her face in her hands. He went to her, put his big gentle hand on her shoulder, feeling the warmth of her, the faint shudder of sobs through the thin cotton fabric. Chris was looking at her, his underlip protruding and trembling, on the verge of tears.

“Hey, take it easy,” he said softly.

She brought herself under control, stood up quickly. “Would you watch the animal eat while I change? Keep him from rubbing the food in his hair.”

“I don’t do that now,” Chris said firmly. “I did that when I was little.” The last word was said with lofty contempt.

Lew sat down while Ivy went back to her room. Chris eyed him solemnly. “Make a fist.”

“Like this?”

Chris nodded. “That’s big! Can I watch you hit somebody?”

“Just anybody?”

“Well, not anybody little! It wouldn’t be fair.”

“Keep eating there, or I’ll be in the doghouse with your mother.”

“She was going to cry.”

“But she didn’t, did she? Eat up, doc.”

Chris went back to eating busily. Jack came whistling out into the kitchen, rumpled Chris’ hair, went through into the small pantry and began to make himself a drink. “Something for you, Lew?”

“Tom Collins, I guess.”

By the time he had finished it, Ivy was dressed. She looked cool and crisp and very lovely. Jack was well on his way to being drunk. The sitter came and they took off in the station wagon, with Lew driving, Jack raising his voice in tenor song.

They had planned to go to the club, but Jack decided he wasn’t in the mood for “that bunch of stuffed shirts,” so they went to a roadhouse he recommended. The place was hot and packed with a swarm of feral-looking teen-agers, but Jack insisted that it was fine, and kept insisting that Ivy dance, first with him and then with Lew.

“Jus’ like ol’ times,” he kept saying.


The steaks were astonishingly good, but Jack ate very little of his. By ten o’clock he was maudlin. They were in a booth and Jack sat facing the two of them, his coat off and his beefy arms on the table. His eyes swam into focus as he smiled at them.

“Two bes’ people in the whole worl’. Bar none. Jus’ a stranger here myself. Always thought she’d marry you, Lew, ol’ pal, ol’ pal. Did a dirty trick. Got confesh... confession to make to both of you. Checked on ol’ Lew before sent wire. Ol’ Lew’s broke, honey. Busted flat — like me. Got two trucks and drives one of them himself. Checked up on him. Two ol’ crocks and both busted flat! But we’ll fool ’em all, won’t we? We’ll pull out o’ this hole. Isn’t she a sweet girl, Lew? Kiss her, Lew. S’all okay with me — all ol’ pals, the three of us. She wants you to. Can’t you see that, ol’ pal?”

“Shut up, Jack,” Ivy said icily.

“Go on, Lew, boy. I let an ol’ pal kiss my pretty wife. Shouldn’t tell you. She’s colder’n Admiral Byrd’s nip pocket, so there’s no harm done. She got a yen for you, Lew. Big yen. Can’t fool me. Married wrong guy. She can’t have love, so we got to help her have pretty things, you and me.” The warm maudlin tone had changed. Something small and evil looked out of his eyes.

“We’d better go, Jack,” Ivy said sharply. “Pull yourself together.”

Lew paid the check and they left. The avid, unlined young faces of the teen-agers made him feel older than mountains. As he was unlocking the station wagon, Ivy, behind him, gave a sharp gasp of pain. Jack giggled drunkenly.

Lew felt anger come up in him, filling his throat. He turned and grabbed Jack’s arm and levered him into the back seat. Jack sang sleepily all the way home and leaned heavily on them as they helped him into the house and into his room.

“Get him into bed, please. Lew,” she said. “I’ll drive the girls home.”

Jack made sleepy protesting sounds as Lew undressed him, rolled him under the sheet. Before he could turn out the light Jack had begun to snore stertorously. The evening had been rough and Lew felt emotionally exhausted. He looked in the boy’s room. Chris was sleeping soundly. Lew took off his coat and went out into the warm night. He looked at the stars and at the city lights, and his cigarette-end glowed in the dark. Jack’s plan would work. They still looked him up, once in a while, sending urgent letters to old addresses. The public had liked him. But once you quit you had to quit completely.

Headlights turned in the drive and Ivy parked by the garage, turned off the lights and motor.

“Lew?” she asked in a low voice.

“Right here. Jack passed out. I checked on the kid. He’s pounding his ear.”

Her dress was pale in the night. She came over to him. “I’m terribly sorry, Lew. He isn’t himself.”

“Now is as good a chance for us to talk as any. If you aren’t too tired.”

“No, I’m all right, Lew.” They went over to the metal furniture. The seats of the chairs were wet with dew and he dried two of them off with his handkerchief. When she leaned forward for a light her cheekbones looked sharp in the match-flare, her eyes shadowed.

“Was that true, Lew? What he said about you being broke?”

“True enough. I’ve got a little less than two thousand dollars. But it isn’t serious. I know the business inside and out now. One of the big lines has been after me. It will be a pretty good job. And a lot easier than trying to wildcat it.”

“What did you tell him about fighting?”

“Just what you told me to say. That I’d think it over.”

“Promise me you’ll turn him down.”

“Why?”

“You know why. I don’t want you going back into that. I don’t want you hurt. Sammy Hode is young and terribly strong, Lew.”

“It will take six weeks of easy workouts and about fifteen minutes in the ring. My end will be around eight thousand. The kid can’t kill me in fifteen minutes. You know that. And it will get lack out of a hole.”

“Will it?”

“Why do you say that, Ivy?”

“If he gets out of this jam, he’ll just head directly into the next one. It’s time he found he can’t beg and wheedle and angle his way out of responsibilities. Maybe he ought to be flat for a while. Maybe it would do us all good.”

“Even Chris?”

“There’s no reason in the world why you should sacrifice yourself for Jack Terrance, Lew. No reason in the wide world.”

“Unless I’m talking to one.”

“Don’t... please!”

He put his big hands flat on the cool damp table and leaned toward her. “I’ve got eyes. What the hell do you think I am? All this time I thought about you. I thought: Stay out, Lew. It’s a good marriage; she is doing fine. A kid and all.

“I come here and I want to look at something good. I want to look at you and feel that it is fine for you. It’s a small thing to want, but it was what I was telling myself... But it stinks. Blind men could see that. It’s in the air. Hurting you, needling you. What kind of husband is that? What kind of marriage is this? For you it should be the best, always. I thought he was giving you what I couldn’t. What would you have had with me? Tough times — scrimping — dime-store dishes. But hell, more than here. Lots more. I have to come here and look at this and all of a sudden I find out I’m the biggest damn’ fool God ever made.”

He stopped suddenly. She had bent forward from the waist, her folded arms against her knees, her head on her arms. In the silence he heard her crying softly.

He went around to her, knelt on the damp grass, touched her shoulder. “I shouldn’t pop off like that. I’m sorry. Forget I said it.”


She straightened up. There was just enough light so he could see the glint-track of tears. “You’re being honest, Lew. More honest than I deserve, I guess. You ran out and I had too much fool pride to follow you and say, ‘Here I am; now what?’ Too much pride — and I married him and it was sort of like getting even with something, like a little kid busting the candy-store window. It was better than this. You’re seeing the worst. This past year has been bad. I’d made up my mind to leave him, and take Chris. It could have been managed easily. He has a little blonde friend, and he’s grown a little careless about the details. I could have obtained custody. Then everything started to go sour, for him. You can’t desert another human being when they’re in trouble, Lew. So I’ve been coasting, hoping he’d come out of it somehow. Instead, it has become worse. He’s like a crazy man most of the time.”

“Would you leave him if he got back on his feet?”

“I... I don’t know, Lew. Maybe it’s too late.”

“I could get him out of it.”

“Not that way, Lew. Not at your expense, ever. Oh, Lew, this isn’t going the way it was supposed to go. I had an act for you, Lew: The happy contented wife. He spoiled all my lines. You see, it isn’t that he’s bad.”

“I know that. He’s weak. I can understand that part of him, and I can still like him, in a funny way. It’s something I can’t explain.”

“I can’t either. But it hasn’t been all bad. You have to know that.”

He smiled ruefully in the darkness. “Maybe I’d like to hear that it had been all bad.”

“No, you wouldn’t.”

“No,” he said, suddenly very weary, “I guess not.”

“Turn him down tomorrow, Lew.”

“Even if it means you’re trapped from here on in?”

She stood up, slim and tall in the night. “I will tell you one thing — and it is something I can’t and won’t change: If you go through with it and it helps him get back on his feet, I may leave him. I don’t know yet. But if I do leave him, Lew, it won’t be to come to you. I won’t be bought — not that way. I’m not for sale, not at the kind of price you’d have to pay.”

“Pride, Ivy?”

“Not this time. Something else.”

“Don’t people ever earn a second chance?”

“Not people like us, Lew. They only give us one chance.”

“Maybe I’d just like to have the eight thousand. I can use it.”

“Don’t try to kid me or yourself. Good night, Lew.”

“Good night, Ivy.” She started to turn away in the darkness, struck her foot against one leg of the table and stumbled awkwardly against him. He caught her in his arms, held her that way for a frozen and measureless moment, then turned her slowly and bent and found her lips. She leaned warm against him in his arms and she was all he had ever wanted or hoped to have. In their kiss was the heat of longing, and all the sadness of too late.

“That’s no good either,” she said, stepping apart from him.

“I know.”

“I could tell myself it was even-Stephen. Sauce for the goose. Turnabout. But, basically, no good. No good for either of us.”

“Good night, Ivy.”

“Good night, my darling.”


In the morning Jack was full of jokes about bleeding from the eyes, and asking if he had had a good time. Aside from an obviously vicious hangover, he was full of abundant confidence that everything was going to turn out just right. At his insistent invitation, Lew went down to the agency with him.

It was a big establishment with a vast service floor, modern showrooms, and a large staff. Jack led the way into his private office. A petite blonde with a savage-looking mouth gave them a winsome smirk as they went through the ante-office.

“Come on in, Janice,” Jack said as they passed her desk.

She came tilting in on four-inch heels, allowed as how she was thrilled to meet the famous Lew Barry — in a sugary Southern voice — and tilted back out again with a quick flash of a smile over her shoulder, a provocative canting of hip.

“Brains of the outfit,” Jack said expansively. “Couldn’t run the place without her. Little hair of the dog?”

“No, thanks.”

Jack downed a lusty shot, heeled the cork into the bottle, and put the liquor back into the desk drawer. He frowned at his watch. “Sammy will be at the gym at ten and we can go over and watch him work out. Suppose you roam around. I’ve got some detail to go over here. Come back here to my office at about ten of ten. Okay?”

Lew wandered out onto the service floor. He watched a ring job on a truck, watched an overdrive being torn down. He looked through the body-and-fender shop, and watched a trade-in being fixed up for resale. He ambled back to the office at quarter to ten. The blonde was leaning over Jack’s shoulder. She straightened up, gave Lew a slightly guilty look and brushed by him, leaving an almost visible trail of perfume.

“How do you like the place, boy?”

“Offhand, I don’t.”

Jack stared at him. “Hell, it’s one of the best layouts in the city.”

“Your service department stinks. I hope you aren’t paying those plumbers top-mechanics’ pay. It isn’t laid out right.”

“You could do better?”

“Much.”

“Relax, Lew. This is my racket. The service department makes money. That’s good enough for me. Come on, we got to watch a boy working.”

The gym was on the second floor of a brick building that looked as though it had begun life as a warehouse. They walked up the stairs into the stink of sweaty socks and rubbing alcohol and liniment and sweaty leather, into the discord of the staccato bags, the skip-ropes, the electrically-timed bell ringing every three minutes all day long, the harsh yells of encouragement, the smoke haze hanging over a floor littered with butts and cellophane and gum wrappers.

Lew had had thirteen years of it. Thirteen years out of his life — from seventeen to thirty. The amateurs for gold watches and gold medals, and the golden gloves, and the tank towns with their dank basement dressing-rooms and rusty-water showers. Thirteen years of working and learning and dreaming. When you’d never seen the other boy work, you came out and you watched him with that same intentness of the matador watching the banderilleros lure the fresh bull into its charges. You felt him out, and you watched the flex of his thighs and the oiled shoulder joint. You slipped them, and rolled with them and blocked them and watched all the time because, though you had color, and a punch in each hand, you were careful and cautious — a workman. And when you saw what he had, then you went to work at the weak points: A right guard held too low, or a too-slow attempt at a counterpunch.


Those were the days of dreams when you were working over the unknowns, hammering out a record. Later came the big boys. You had moving pictures of them; you hired sparring partners who had the same style. And the top boys were rougher, smarter. Maxie, the clown, hit you with one of those wide sweeping rights and knocked you cleanly through the ropes and it took a full twelve count to get untangled from the press boys and climb back in. But the next time you had him laughing out loud, and Maxie always laughed when you hurt him.

You didn’t bounce back so fast. The aches stayed with you for long days and nights after a bout. And your shift was a half-step behind, and the counterpunch a whisker slow, and the dreams had faded and it was brutal work. But there had to be money to settle the debts from the crummy investments, and settle a tax thing, and you knew the peak was well past, and yet you signed for the second Louis go, and that impassive chocolate soldier stalked you and caught and pulverized you.

Thirteen years and now it had been over for five years and all you had left was less than two thousand dollars, and a lot of fine print in the record books, and the thickness of scar-tissue on brow and mouth — and yet, luck had smiled a little and had left you with your brain and your eyes undamaged.

He walked up the stairs into his past and they saw him. The ones with the memories came over first and the others tagged along. Jack Terrance strutted massively and waved his cigar and made-hints, while the others, pumping Lew’s hand, gave him no chance to shut Jack up. He was sorry he had come.

“Lew! Lew!” Jack called. “Here’s the next heavyweight champion. Lew Barry, meet Sammy Hode.”

Hode was in purple tights. His tanned skin glistened with sweat, his dark hair was tousled. His hands were wrapped up but the gloves were off. The bridge of his nose was flattened, but except for that he was unmarked. Lew liked the look of him, as a person, as a man. He had dark direct eyes, a look of intentness, and yet there was a hint of good humor in his level mouth. He was one of those fighters built like a fire hydrant. Beefed from his ears to his ankles, but with a rubbery bouncy look about his muscles and head set tight to the wide shoulders. Hard to hurt, Lew decided, hard to cut or bruise, hard to hit solidly if he knew how to move.

“Jack gave you the big buildup, Sammy,” Lew said, smiling.

“He can be right and he can be wrong, Mr. Barry. I’d just like to get a chance to find out.”

“I want Lew to see you work, Sammy.”

“Sure, Jack. Mastrik is dressing; here he comes now. Al, you want to ref us?”


They climbed into the center ring. Lew and Jack sat ringside. Jack was hunched forward with his cigar clamped tightly in his teeth. One of the hangers-on helped Sammy Hode strap the face-guard on. Mastrik was a big, strong-looking Polish boy, so blond he was almost an albino. They took corners, scuffed around, came out at the next bell. Lew watched closely. For the first thirty seconds the kid was too eager to make a showing. Then he settled down. His style was deceptive. He would do little bounce steps, gloves at his sides, able to flick either hand into jab, hook or punch. Then he would crouch low and do a flat-footed weave. His punches had snap. He was quick and a sharpshooter. Lew saw it coming in the second round. Sammy, moving to his own right, slammed a solid left hook an inch above Mastrik’s belt. The taller man’s arms dropped and, as they did, Sammy shifted, moving fast to his own left, measuring Mastrik with a short left jab; then he unleashed a right that Lew, sitting ringside, could feel all the way down to his heels.



Mastrik went down heavily onto his hands and knees, shaking his head. Sammy helped him up and they walked him back to the corner.

Lew found he was breathing hard. Jack leaned toward him. “Like?”

“How old is he and what does he go?”

“Twenty-two, one ninety-six, and he’s no bum. College graduate.”

“He might make it.”

“Might?”

“He’s almost too clean, Jack. Too good a kid. This isn’t patty cake he’s playing. Can he get sore?”

“I haven’t seen it yet. I don’t know.”

“He’ll have to watch his weight. That build takes on fat easy.”

“He works it off. He’s a worker.”

“Look, I didn’t like you letting those guys think I might fight this kid.”

“What have you got to lose? You scared of him?”

“That doesn’t work, Jack. I’m too old for that and you know it.”

“Okay, okay. Anyway, I lined up a good boy to train him — old Jud Brock.”

“Jud! Is he here?”

“Right over there. Just came up the stairs.”

Lew left Jack and went through the crowd. Jud was low-built and bald; his tired eyes tilted down at the outside corners. He had a W. C. Fields nose, and a deceptive look of low comedy.

“What grease pit did you crawl out of, Lew? Come on in here.” Jud Brock took him into a small office and slammed the door in the face of a man who tried to follow them in.

Jud leaned against a battered oak desk and filled his pipe, while he stared steadily at Lew. “You working up to be a damn’ fool?”

“What makes you think so?”

“Your old pal Terrance — all mouth and no sense.”

“He likes to jump the gun, Jud. What the hell are you doing here?”

“I’m retired. I own this place. The poor-man’s Stillman’s. So I’m training the kid because Morgan gave him some bad habits and he’s the best kid I’ve seen — since a kid named Barry.”

“No kid any more.”

Jud studied him. “But you haven’t gone to slop like most do. You still got a flat belly. But that kid could kill you. I guess you know that.”

“I know it. My eyesight is still fine.”

“I’m sorry to see you here, Lew.”

“Maybe I’m broke, Jud. Ever think of that?”

“Nobody is that broke. Come over here. Take a look.”

Lew went over curiously. He recognized the glossy print on the wall at which Jud pointed: A victory booth at Lindy’s. He had to think for a moment to remember which scrap it was. He was there in the picture, much younger, and with a fine shelf over his left eye. Six were jammed in the booth. They were all grinning at the flash camera. Jack and Ivy and himself on one side. Jud and Fallow, and on the other side a sports reporter whose name he did not remember. Jud snapped the picture with a horny thumbnail. “Remember what happened that, night? Jack had a big deal lined up. I yelled like a banshee, but you turned over half your end of the gate. All he had to do was ask, and you give it to him. His big deal went over like celluloid fire-tongs. It paid off a dime on the dollar two years later.”


Jud sighed; he went back to the desk and perched on it like a disabused gremlin. “Otherwise you’re smart, Lew. But this one guy could re-sell you the Brooklyn Bridge. Why? I could never get it. He’s all mouth; a week ago he tells me you’re going to fight the kid on August 1st at the River Stadium. I told him to go back to smoking pod — this mainlining is bad on the imagination.”

“What else did you tell him?”

“I told him that if you just happened to go crazy and sign up, it would be a good contest, like sending my maiden aunt in against Sugar Ray. She’s only a little bit bedridden.”

“Flatterer!”

“I mean it. You can’t sharpen those reflexes.”

“And if I said I’d risk it because I’m broke?”

Jud lighted his pipe with little popping sounds of his lips He shook out the match and tossed it over his shoulder. “I’d say there’s another reason. A two-legged reason — a gray-eyed reason. And, don’t forget, son, a married reason.”

“I know that. I’m not forgetting it. Indirectly, though, it helps her.”

“To get Terrance out of a hole? The whole town knows he’s in over his head. The whole city knows he’s on the skids for good this time. A temporary break? What good does it do him?”

“I’m already tangled up in all this, Jud. I don’t know. Maybe it’s a penance for being a damn’ fool five years ago.”

“She was your girl. Plain as the nose on my face, and I own the plainest nose ever seen in New York. Why did you let her go, anyway?”

“Nothing to offer. That’s what I thought.”

“If this wasn’t my own office, I’d spit on the floor. It would express my opinion. So now you let the kid hospitalize you because you want to punish yourself. If I know you, son, the past five years have been punishment enough.”

Lew smiled. “Well, almost enough. Anyway, I’m broke. We can plant a tree in the middle of the ring and I can dodge around it. Let me make a gesture.”

“Do you want her?” Jud asked slowly.

Lew felt a mixture of irritation and anger. “That’s a hell of a personal question, Jud.”

Jud inspected his pipe, tamped the burning tobacco down with a calloused thumb. “Personal, yes. It will take a minute to explain. You got a minute?”

“Of course.”


“Remember, Lew, how dirty it was five years ago? The tie-ins and the booking and the continual rape of the financial innocents?”

“I remember.”

“Now it’s worse. I had a shred of decency left, so I got to hell out of New York. They weren’t kidding when they said the whole deal needs a Congressional investigation. It’s tighter. You can’t wedge your way in. They lay it on the line. If they don’t own a piece of your boy, directly or indirectly, and a fairly generous piece, he can’t get booked into the big time anywhere in the country. And they’ve got the dough to buy in, and they’ve got the muscles, just in case somebody needs their mind changed.”

“How does that affect me?”

“I keep my nose to the ground. A very sensitive mechanism, my boy — it picks up all the earth tremors. A damp little specimen named Clyde Sheniver is in town. He’s a front for important money. The important money wants a piece of Sammy Hode. He brought two sets of muscles with him — a pair of kids with the wrongsize pupils in their eyes, and the usual touch of acne. Jack needed an advance, so he made a deal with this Clyde Sheniver: Sixty thousand bucks for four-fifths of Jack’s contract with Sammy Hode provided Sammy knocks out one Lew Barry in the River Stadium on August 1st. Jack took half in advance. Thirty thousand. He has to give it back if it doesn’t go through. In plain and simple language, he can’t give it back. So, I am an old man and maybe I’m getting tired of the human race. But if you want the lady, just say no. I understand that the current fashion is to make it look like suicide. They got a new gimmick where they run an extension off the tail pipe of a car. You lost her on a rebound and you can get her back the same way.”

“It doesn’t make sense. Why didn’t they just muscle him into selling out at a low figure?”

“Because the big money has tried to get you back in there to help build up the reputation of their punks from time to time and it was always no dice. If Jack can work this, it puts Sammy Hode close to the top in one jump. It’s well worth their sixty thousand. And, as I said, this is a real good kid. The best in too many years, I think. See what a sucker you are, to Jack’s way of thinking? He’s sold the deal before you agreed. He knows he can talk you into anything.”

Lew sat down quietly, arms on his knees, chin on his chest. Jud kept quiet. After a time Lew heard him knock the ashes out of his pipe: he looked up then.

“It all means this, Jud: It means I’ve got to go through with it.”

“For God’s sake, why?”

“He’s staked too much on it. He’s staked his life on it. I can’t let a man down when he makes a bet that big.”

“And you’ll throw the bout?”

“Don’t forget. I just watched the kid out there. All I want to do is stay alive. I’ll settle for a knockout. I won’t exactly hold my chin out, but I have a feeling he’ll find it.”

Jud sighed heavily. He slid off the desk, walked around and opened the drawer. He took out a key, walked across the room and handed it to Lew.

“What’s this?”

“A place I’ve got. It’s on Lake Gloria fifteen miles out of town, south on Route 80. My name is on the mailbox. All the equipment is there. I’ll train the kid right here. You know how to pace yourself. I’ll send a good man out tomorrow to cook and clean up, and you can phone me here by the time you’re ready for sparring partners.”

“You sound as though you knew I’d go through with it before I walked in here.”

“I had a visit from a lady the other day. We talked about you. We made a few guesses. She’ll drive you out there. You see, I guess we both know you too well. Now get the hell out of here and I’ll be in Hode’s corner on August 1st, with my hand over my eyes. I sure hate the sight of bloodshed.”

Lew walked out steadily, stood flat-footed in front of Jack Terrance arid told him he would go through with it. Jack climbed on a chair to announce it. As his harsh excited voice filled the smoky room, Lew saw Sammy Hode over near one of the heavy bags. The boy’s face was expressionless. His mouth tightened a bit. He turned, tapped the bag with his left, hit it viciously with a right. The stitches burst and the sand began to pour onto the wooden floor. The boy turned and their eyes met, held, across thirty feet of the smoky room. Lew was the first to drop his glance.


During the first few quiet days at Brock’s camp on Lake Gloria, Lew Barry thought often of the strange trip from the city when Ivy had brought him out in the convertible. She had brought Chris along and he had spent his time “killing” all the other cars with a plastic ray gun.

When he had gone back, alone, to the house after agreeing to the bout, leaving Jack to call up the papers, she had taken one long look at him, and turned quickly away, saying, “I knew you would. I hated to think of it, but somehow I knew you would.”

“To arrive at any decision, you weigh all the factors as judiciously as possible. That’s what it said in the correspondence course on executive training that I took a couple of years ago. About last night, I’m sorry.”

“It wasn’t your fault or mine. It just happened. It can be forgotten.”

“I want you to think over what you said. I keep thinking that maybe you said it too fast. If he gets back on his feet, I want you to leave him. Then take some time — a half-year, or a year. Then we’ll be together.”

“Don’t build up a dream, Lew. We had one chance.”

“And I muffed it.”

“It was partly my fault, too. I could have put my pride in my pocket for once. But it isn’t pride this time. It’s something else. Can’t you see it? It’s a way of buying my freedom. And I don’t want it bought that way.”

“But now I’ve told him I’ll do it. I can’t back out.”

“That’s too bad.”

“You sound so damn’ cold.”

“Think of it the other way, Lew. Suppose I agreed to that. They kill old men in the ring. In the ring you’re an old man. So I pin that in my memory-book. I killed him because that was my price.”

“Not your price, but mine. You and Jud, you both seem to think I’m some kind of a zombie. Jack pulls the string and along I come. Don’t either of you ever think of the reason for that? You both know the reason. I was nineteen and he was twenty-four and just an acquaintance, a guy who hung around, good for some laughs. And then there was that night when that crazy man came into the dressing-room with a cannon. I was the one who froze. Not Jack! He made the dive, slamming me out of the way, diving at that crazy guy and taking that big slug right in the shoulder, and his momentum piled the crazy guy up against the wall. His arm still doesn’t work perfectly. You know that. And the slug would have got me dead center. Everybody who saw it knew that.”

“Don’t be a shiny-eyed little boy!”

“What does that mean?”

“Suppose it were reversed. You’d have done the same. And forgotten it. You — wouldn’t have expected Jack to keep paying and paying for the rest of his life just because he happened to be alive, would you?”

“No, but—”

“When he could have paid back the money he chiseled out of you, he made no effort to do so. When you walked out, he was perfectly happy to pick me up on the rebound, without the slightest twinge of conscience. Good old Lew — good old sucker! You make me sick!”

“I’m not doing this for Jack.”

“And I insist that you’re not doing it for me. I won’t allow that.”

“So I’m doing it for myself. So I’m broke. Jud said you’d drive me out there. Let’s put the show on the road.”


He had expected that the fifteen-mile ride would be grim and silent. Instead, Ivy chattered with pleasant, formal gayety all the way. The fight was not mentioned. The quarrel was not mentioned. They found the mailbox and turned down the steep driveway to the camp on the lake shore. The lake was small and blue and pretty. The camp itself was small and rustic, with a big front porch. Near the camp was a barnlike structure which Lew guessed must contain the equipment. The electricity was turned on and the water was hooked up. Inside was the smell of dust and spring spiders and closed windows. There was a carton on the kitchen table, a stock of canned staples.

They went out onto the porch and he said softly, forgetting the quarrel and the tension, “It’s like shutting a door behind you and thinking you’d never open it again, and then you’re back in the room you left. But I feel like an — I can’t think of the word.”

“Impostor?”

“That’s it. But it’s work I know. It’s something I learned to do.”

She turned quickly toward, him, both hands resting light on his forearm. “Lew! Lew, don’t try to — to prove anything. Don’t try to prove you’re as good as you ever were.”

“I know I’m not.”



“Luck, Lew! The best.”

She left. He stood and watched as she backed the car around in the narrow place, watched as it dug slowly up the hill in low, disappearing around the bend, the small bright face of the boy turned to watch him, ray gun waving in the late afternoon sunlight. He stood there long after he could no longer hear the car, wondering why it never seemed possible to do anything in life with a clear and uncluttered motive, why all actions had to be compromised by strange and conflicting intangibles. He was a big man, and thickened tissues had destroyed the original mobility of his features, so that he seemed to be filled with a somber, watchful reserve. He thought of Ivy and his heart turned over, but his face did not change.

That first evening he sat on the porch and watched the lake until the black flies drove him inside. He ate sparingly, found the bedclothes, made up his bed. The sheets had a damp smell of winter about them. A nightmare awakened him, cold and sweating: He was in the ring with Sammy Hode. Hode had iron gloves, and each blow tore through Lew’s body, rending it as if it were damp paperboard...

He took it easy the first few days. The man came out from the city by bus and walked down to the camp. He was a round, impassive Negro, an excellent cook, a relentless housekeeper. His name was Oliver.

Lew gave a lot of thought to how he should train. He was powerful enough. The meaty fibrous layers of muscle rolled hard under his skin. He weighed two hundred and seven on the camp scales, and it would not be much of a problem to bring that weight down to around one ninety-eight without weakening himself. The problem was that of too much intractable toughness in the muscles. He had to limber them, loosen them, make them slide more easily under the skin. With a more resilient muscle tone his arms and legs would respond more quickly and lithely to the messages sent by the brain along the nerve threads, messages that had to be answered in the quickest possible fraction of a second.

He saw that the orthodox training methods would do him little good. Road work would stiffen his legs, would hamper mobility without increasing stamina. Yet it would improve his wind. He compromised by substituting swimming for road work. He gave up cigarettes with an abruptness that left his nerves on edge. The swimming loosened his muscles, improved his wind. He needed to improve his quickness of eye and of reflex. With a certain grim amusement at himself, he sent Oliver into the village to buy tennis balls. Then, doggedly, he started to teach himself to juggle. His hands were slow and clumsy at first, the tennis balls bounding away in all directions. But he persisted, hour after hour, while Oliver would shake his head and mutter and raise clouds of dust with a violent broom. He had no way of measuring improvement in quickness, but he thought he could detect a quickening response.

He phoned Jud Brock. “Jud, I could use one good man.”

“One?”

“A good fast light or middle with no punch and a lot of class. He doesn’t have to know Hode’s style. Can do?”

Jud was silent for a time. He said, “I’ve got one — an Italian kid. I see what you’re trying to do. Pretty smart, son.”

“How much will he cost?”

“It’s on the house, Lew.”

“No. I want to pay.”

“Hell with that! How’s it going?”

“I can’t tell yet.”

“Expect him tomorrow. Nice kid — his name is Rillo, Jimmy Rillo. Newspaper guys have been haunting me and Jack. I told Jack to keep his mouth shut about where you are, for a while.”

“Good. I’m not ready to show off yet? And start lining up a heavy with the kid’s style.”

“A hitter?”

“By then it won’t matter. But let me pay.”

“We’ll talk about that. Oliver okay?”

“Fine. He’s helping me set up the ring. Send up a new turnbuckle, will you? The threads are stripped on one we have.”

“Sure.”


The next day Jud Brock arrived with Jimmy Rillo. Jud said, “Decided to come at the last minute. I’m here as a spy. Boy, you look brown enough.”

“In the ring I have to look healthy, Pop.”

“Jimmy, take it easy on this old man Barry. He’s fragile.”

“He sure doesn’t look it, Mr. Brock. Nice to meet you, Mr. Barry. I saw you fight Mickey Noonan in Cleveland. It was the first big fight I ever saw. I guess I was about seven years old then, Mr. Barry.”

“You better call me Lew, Jimmy. You okay to try a few minutes right now? I want to find out a few things about myself.”

“Sure, Lew. I got my stuff right here.”

“This I have to see,” Jud said softly.

Oliver taped their hands and they put on the big gloves, the headguards. The ring took up two-thirds of the floor-space in the big shed. Sun shafted golden through the high windows, and dust motes drifted in the beams.

Five years, Lew thought, and here you are back in the ring. And that last time you had the right all waiting and ready, waiting for that big brown left shoulder to drop so you could slam it in on the unprotected right cheek, which was the only way anybody ever got to Louis, and you got your chance — but your timing was off and you missed and he killed you.

Jimmy Rillo was nervous. They touched gloves; Jimmy flicked a light jab and Lew tried to knock it away, a third of a second too late. His own jab, in contrast to Jimmy’s, seemed like slow motion, jimmy began to gain confidence. He moved superbly, and hit Lew almost at will. Lew had the strange feeling that he was standing, fighting in water that came up to the bridge of his nose. Only his eyes were out of water. Water slowed his every move. He could see what he should be doing and he tried to force his muscles to respond, but they were always late. Too late. Finally he broke it off and leaned on the top rope, breathing deep and hard. He rubbed the sweat from his eyes with a towel and, tossing the towel aside, met Jud Brock’s cold glance.

“It’s about what I expected,” Lew said, keeping his voice steady.

“Timing will come back. And don’t forget, Jimmy is as fast as light. If he had a punch I’d have got him up where he belongs long ago.”

“Don’t kid me, Jud.”

“Okay. I’ll tell you. Maybe I’m doing you a favor to tell you: In there you look like the Primo looked in his best days. A jab like an old man throwing a medicine ball — footwork like a dairy horse. You’ll improve before the bout, but not enough. When he hits you, son, stay down. If you don’t stay down, he’ll hurt you. Because you’re not quick enough any more to slip them and roll with them. He’ll hit you solidly, and he’ll hit you seven more times before you hit the floor. It won’t be pretty, and I wish to hell I was a plumber or a birdwatcher — anything but this racket.”

Jimmy was looking down at the floor in shy silence. Lew walked to the car with Jud. There wasn’t much left to say.


Each day he swam and juggled and went as far as he could go with Jimmy. He did better with the kid, but he knew that it was because he was out-thinking the kid, not moving faster or better. He hit where he planned that the kid would be, and Jimmy, each day, seemed to be moving into the right place oftener. Once, in his eagerness to improve his speed, he hit the kid squarely and solidly. The kid wavered, took a half step, and went flat on his face before Lew could catch him. He was out for over five minutes, and when he came to, he was sick to his stomach. It gave Lew a bitter satisfaction to know that the punch was still there, that even with the big gloves and the protecting mask, it was a numbing jolt.

Each day he tried to pace himself, and he found he could not go more than seven or eight rounds, no matter how careful he tried to be. And he knew that he would be no better by the night of the fight. Just twenty-four minutes of fight left in the thirty-five-year-old body. Twenty-four minutes of all-out effort. From the first bell there would be twenty-four minutes of scrap, with fourteen minutes of total rest between rounds, and it wouldn’t be enough.

At the end of eight rounds with Jimmy, his knees trembled and shook like the legs of a foundered horse. His arms were leaden; a vast pain constricted his left side; his mouth was cottony. He could not suck enough air into his lungs. He was quicker, but not quick enough. He sent Jimmy back and another kid came out, a bouncy, arrogant, loud-mouthed kid named Riker. He was a heavyweight and in the first minute of the first workout with him, Lew sensed that the boy wanted to knock him out so that he could go back to the city and strut and crow. The boy was fast. Lew grimly took his punishment, waiting, angling, plodding after the boy, shaking off the heavy punches, feeling his sight grow dim. Then, blocking the boy in a corner, he found his target, went to work, beat the boy to his knees. That ended the arrogance. That closed the loud mouth. That made the boy a suitable, cooperative, wary sparring partner. It earned Lew, from Oliver, a wide, white, appreciative grin.

On the afternoon of the eighth of July, Jack Terrance came out in a big car with two nationally-known sports writers and two reporters from local papers. The bottle had been passed freely during the ride. They were all warm, sweaty, loud and opinionated.

One of the nationally-known writers got Lew aside, and said with drunken solemnity: “That’s the trouble with you pugs. None of you know when to quit. Tunney was the only guy with sense. You made your pile and now you got to come back and get your ears batted off. You’re kidding yourself, Barry; you were through five years ago. You’ll be doing yourself a favor to call this whole thing off right now.”

Jack had come within hearing distance. He swaggered over and said: “Listen, you. I didn’t bring you out here to talk Lew out of fighting. Hell, this is the only chance I get to show the country how good my boy is.”

“So he licks Barry. Does that make Hode good, Terrance?”

Jack grinned. “I know some people who think so.”

“Those people you mean, Terrance, they aren’t thinking of fighting. They’re thinking of the gate. It gives your boy a name. That’s all.”

“Nobody ever knocked Lew out. Don’t forget that.”

“And he’s your old pal. You two got it fixed which round Barry dives in?” The tone was full of amused contempt.

Lew reached out quite slowly and wrapped his left hand in the material of the speaker’s pale sports jacket. He pulled the man close to him, and smiled at him. “You’re all mouth, friend. Maybe you better stick to tennis matches.”

“You hit me and I’ll take every dime you’ve got.”

“I can’t hit you, friend, because my hand is bare and I got a fight coming up — but one thing you should know by now, if you’ve been around. I never took a dive — and I never will. Jack’s got a good boy and I’m going to try to lick him. You say anything else in your column, friend, and I’ll sue hell out of you.” He released the man.

“Will you go a couple rounds with Riker for the boys?” Jack asked.

Lew agreed. He went three rounds. After he showered, Jack came into his bedroom and sat on the bed.

“What did they say about it, Jack?”

“They’re down on the porch, yakking. Frankly, you didn’t look so good.”

“I’ve never looked good in training. You know that from way back.”


Jack leaned back on the bed. “I guess I don’t feel right about all this, Lew. I shouldn’t have got the ball rolling this way. Watching you out there, I got to thinking it could be bad if Sammy tagged you too hard. I guess I haven’t thought about your end of it enough.”

Lew could see him in the bureau mirror. “Call it off?”

“I’d like to. But I can’t. Not now. Too much on the line now to call it off. It’s my only chance to get out from under. I explained all that.” He shrugged and grinned weakly. “Ivy won’t talk to me. But, Lew, as long as we’re in this, we might as well play it smart.”

Lew pulled his belt tight and turned. “How do you mean that?”

Jack looked uncomfortable. “I like the way you handled that hint about a dive. That was just right. The way those boys write this up will mean a lot in the odds department.”

“Go on.”

“Lew, the kid is going to lick you. You know that.”

“Probably.”

“Let’s be practical. The kid is going to lick you. I don’t want him to hurt you badly. Ivy doesn’t want him to hurt you. You’ve never been knocked out. I got hold of some dough. Say I put up a few thousand for you, Hode to knock you out in the fourth. The worst odds I could get would probably be four to one, calling the round like that. And the kid is a hitter. It won’t have to look bad. Just give him the clean shot and then, even if you don’t go out all the way, take too long getting up. It could mean another twelve thousand. Twenty altogether for you.”

Lew kept his voice quiet. “How about the kid?”

“I wouldn’t want to try to let him know the fix was in. Hell, you can last three rounds. I can do it this way: I can tell him that it will be smart to keep out of your way, keep you working hard for three rounds and then go after you in the fourth. Lew, you’ve got nothing to lose. It isn’t your career any more. And I’m in a hell of a jam. Every nickel counts. I’m in as bad shape as you were that night that hopped-up kid had his finger on the trigger. Remember that night?”

“I remember it.”

“I want to get out of the automobile business. I’m getting sick of it. I can keep a piece of the kid. I think we’ll move back to New York. It’s going to take money. I sell the agency tomorrow, and it just about balances out — debts against my equity in it. And those tax boys are sniffing at my heels. I had to pay something, to stall for time — and now the balance is due.”

“If he can get me in the fourth, Jack, he gets me in the fourth.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just that. If he can’t get me then, he can’t.”

Jack stood up quickly. “You’re a damn’ fool!”

“Sure. I’m a white knight. I got a shine on my armor. And every morning I shave this face. I turn crooked, and I have to shave with my eyes shut. I might cut myself.”

“The world isn’t like that. Wake up! You got to make things pay off. The kid is going to knock you out anyway. Calling the round brings in gravy. What’s the difference?”

“None, to you. A lot, to me.”


There was a grayness about Jack’s mouth. “But look! The kid has to knock you out. I already—”

“I know about that. Fighting the kid is the last installment I owe you on a debt. Laying down would be something else again. I fight, and the books are clean. All you can do is pray the kid does what you promised. So you can collect the rest of your money, the other thirty thousand, and then sell him to the racket boys.”

“Brock told you!” Jack said accusingly. “How did he find out?”

“I’ll make a little bet. I’ll bet you already told Sheniver the fix was in.”

Jack nodded wordlessly.

Lew tucked his thumbs in his belt. “I’ll see you around. Better get a ringside ticket. It ought to be an interesting fight.”

Jack smiled uncertainly. “It’s a rib, isn’t it? You’ll make it the fourth, won’t you?”

“Buy a good seat, Jack.”

Jack went out. Lew had kept himself calm. But he could feel cool sweat trickle down his ribs. In a crazy way, that might be the answer. Let it be the fourth. Make it look good. Save yourself a beating. Keep your brains unscrambled.


The girl arrived three days later, at ten in the morning. Lew was two hundred feet out in the lake. Oliver called to him. He swam lazily back to the dock, hoisted himself, dripping, up onto the weathered boards. He guessed her age at about twenty. She was slim and very blonde and quite pretty and very nervous. She clutched a red purse in both hands. There was a battered deck chair on the dock. Lew said, “Hi! You look too nervous to be a sports reporter. Have a seat, and stop jittering.”

She sat down, smiled gratefully. “I really don’t know what I’m doing here. It’s all sort of crazy. It’s really advice I want, I guess. And Mr. Brock said you could give me advice better than he could. My name is Marilyn Schantz. I’m... well, I am or I was, engaged to Sammy Hode. We went together in school. Would you — like a cigarette?”

“Go ahead. They’re off my list. Just what did Jud say?”

“He said that you’d been through the mill. I don’t know what to think. It was like a joke — in school, I mean — Sammy fighting. But he was awfully good. Winning the intercollegiates and all, and he was half-joking about it. That Morgan man got him thinking about the money, and now Mr. Terrance. We talked, and he said in just maybe three years he could make so much money it would help us the rest of our lives. I agreed, sort of. Now it scares me, Mr. Barry, because he’s changing. He’s different. He thinks about it all in a different way, and there aren’t any jokes about it any more. Last week we quarreled about it, a nasty quarrel. You see, I keep thinking it will change him. And I’m not— I don’t feel safe any more. I talked to Mr. Brock. He said you know as much as anybody.”

She looked at him and a lot of her nervousness was gone. He said, “You mean, is Sammy doing the right thing — that’s what you want to know, isn’t it?”

“Yes.”

Lew studied his knuckles. “My folks were good sound people. But I was a tough, wild, unruly kid. I gave them a bad time. I got in with the wrong crowd. I broke their hearts. I was sent to a reform school. I came out and all the doors seemed to be closed. I fought for peanuts. Jud Brock saw me and took over. He’s a good man. Fighting took the bitterness out of me. I guess I needed it. For me, it was a good thing. For me it did something that perhaps nothing else could have done.”

“But Sammy—”

“That’s just it. I don’t see how it will serve any purpose for him. Can he get a job?”

“Oh, yes!” she said eagerly. “He had two good offers and I know he could still—”

“Jack Terrance will sell his contract to some rough people. They’ll see that he doesn’t get rich. What they won’t take, taxes will.”

“He won’t stop now, though.”

“He said that?”

“He said he was the best, and he would prove it and then he’ll stop.”

“When you’re the best, they make you go on proving it until you can’t prove it any more. Then you’re second-best and you got to keep trying to get to be best again until you get smart enough to realize you’re done, or get pounded around the head long enough so you don’t realize anything any more, at least not clearly.”

“That won’t happen to him!”

“It might not. I give you that. Maybe he isn’t mean enough.”

“What do you mean?”

“He looks like what they call a nice, clean-cut kid. I’m going in there with him. I’ll look at him, and before a punch is thrown, I’ll hate him. I’ll want to kill him. I’ll want to smash his face to a pulp. Maybe he won’t want to do that to me.”

She looked at him almost in horror. “He isn’t like that!”

“Maybe you’ve got to be like that. Maybe he can’t be like that. Maybe life has given him too easy a time. You’ve got to want to smash things.”

She bit her lip, looked out across the lake. She turned toward him. “Can you beat him? Can you? Jud says if you do, he’s through. He’s all done.”

“I don’t think I can beat him. I might hurt him. I’ll try to hurt him. It’s my trade to try to hurt him. But he’ll win.”


She stood up quickly. “Thank you.”

“I haven’t done anything.”

“I found out what I want to know.”

“What will you do?”

She smiled. It was a twisted, wry, self-knowing smile. “Stay with him, no matter what happens. I guess that’s all I can do.”

He watched her go up the path. He slid back into the lake and swam hard for a time, swam with all his strength, winding himself badly...

Ivy came out alone on the last day of July. It was early afternoon. He was sitting on the porch, reading. He recognized her step, though he hadn’t heard the car. He tossed the book aside and stood up.

She smiled at him. “Such concentration, Lew! You look fit.”

“A man lives alone and he learns to get drunk on liquor or drunk on books. I’m a reader these days. Sit down — here.”

She sat and crossed her legs neatly and lit her cigarette and looked at him over the long exhalation of smoke. “I’ve read the papers,” she said.

“So have I. A lamb going to the slaughter. Nobody comes back. A tired old man fighting youth.”

“How is it, actually?”

He sat gingerly on the porch railing. It creaked under his weight. “Rough estimate, half as good as I was five years ago.”

“Will you make it a fight?”

“It won’t be orthodox, if that’s what you mean. I can’t outbox him and I can’t outslug him. The only thing left is to out-think him. And he is a bright boy.”

“Are you scared, Lew?”

He looked at her soberly. “Every time I think about tomorrow night I get knots in my belly; my throat dries up; I sweat; my hands shake. I guess I’m scared.”

“But he’ll have to work for it?”

“He’ll have to work for it, Ivy.”

She smiled and some of the tension went out of her. “I don’t know why I should be glad to hear that. It would be safer for you if I believed Jack. Something primitive in me, I guess. I didn’t like the taste in my mouth when he said you’d lie down. Yet half of me wishes you would.”

“How is Jack?”

“I wouldn’t know.”

He stared at her. “What does that mean?”

She looked away, flushing. “It got a bit impossible — it isn’t important.”

“You know how important it is.”

“After he was out here a few weeks ago, he started drinking heavier than ever. He brought some very unsavory people out to the house. There was a man named Sheniver, and some prime juvenile delinquents. Jack brought them in one day during Chris’ nap. They were making too much noise. I tried to quiet them down. Jack hit me and tore my dress. I told him, when he was sober, that he’d better move out until the fight was over. He made an issue of it, but he moved out.”

“You’ll take that?”


She lifted her chin. “No. Sometimes you come to the end of an obligation. You don’t owe anything any more. I’ve got a little money. My mother will take Chris while I get the divorce. I’m leaving the day after tomorrow, Lew.”

“I’ll follow along.”

She shook her head. “No, Lew. It’s like a book. You’re in it, and Jack is in it, and Jud, and the crazy years. I’m closing the book. For good.”

“You can’t make it work.”

She stood up. “I came out to wish you luck. Like the old days, Lew — that’s all. You put me out of your life; I’m strong enough to do the same thing.”

“Will you see the fight?”

“Yes.”

“You never saw one in the old days. You said you couldn’t.”

“I’m seeing it to prove something to myself, Lew.”

“Thank you for wishing me luck.”

“You’re very welcome.” She turned on her heel. She did not say good-by. He did not walk to the car. He heard it leave. After a long time he picked up his book again. He could no longer follow the story.


After the weighing-in, Lew went back to the hotel and astonished himself by falling dead asleep. It was a sultry afternoon; the hotel draperies hung limp by the open windows. A pounding on the door woke him. He felt drugged by sleep; it took him a moment to remember where he was, remember what he faced at nine o’clock. There was a sour taste in his mouth, and the sky outside looked like brass. He opened the door. The man was lean and florid and overdressed, and he had a false air of joviality.

“Just checking, Lew. Just checking?”

“Who the hell are you?”

“Why, I’m Clyde Sheniver! I got a nice option on Hode. We can give that boy a great future. Too bad that dinky stadium only holds seventeen thousand. It’s a sell-out. They’re scalping tickets in the street. Hope the rain holds off.”

Sheniver had slid inconspicuously into the room. He fanned himself with a cocoa straw hat.

“Is there something special on your mind?”

“Lew, I don’t agree with the newspaper punks. I like the look of experience. It tells every time. You got a couple of damn’ good fights left in you. Damn’ good fights!”

“What’s the pitch?”

“Lew, you’ve got a hell of a reputation for honesty. I don’t want to see you lose that.”

“Am I going to lose it?”

“It is awful tough to dive with experts watching you. It will make a stink. The kid thinks he can lick you. I do too. But in a square fight, I don’t think the kid can knock you out in the fourth.”

Lew began to sense what was coming. He decided to play along, to test his guess. “You think I can do better?”

“A good scrap makes the money roll in. Two good scraps make it roll in faster. I sounded the kid out. He’s got a wholesome respect for money, just like we have. A good smart kid. Now Terrance has some money riding on a knockout. In fact, the kid has to get a knockout, or we get him cheap from Terrance. That’s in the option. I’ve got a hunch Terrance is wrong. You know how the kid and me see it?”

“How?”

“A nice long fight here, to a decision or a TKO. No knockout. And then a nice fat rematch back East where the big money is. Look how it shapes. I pick up the kid for peanuts — in fact I get a nice bundle back from Terrance, and I know how to take care of people who do me a favor. You get your end out of this, plus a bonus. Then in the big deal back East you get a lot more. You, me, the kid — we all make out. And the public gets two nice bouts.”

“And Terrance gets cleaned?”

“Not at all. He makes a profit on the kid. He isn’t hurt. Maybe he loses a couple bets. But he still owns a small piece of the kid, so he makes all of it back on the New York fight.”

“How does Hode stand on it?”

“You know how the green kids are. I put a little doubt in his mind. I told him Terrance wasn’t smart if he asks for a knockout. I told him you’re still dangerous. It’s a better deal for him to outpoint you, and let the bout go the limit and get the decision. I get your okay and I’ll make the talk stronger yet.”



Lew looked at the man cautiously. “Nobody likes getting knocked out.”

“A deal?”

“I’ll put up a good fight. I’ve said that right along.”

“That’s good enough for me. Here. Take this.”

“Hold onto it. Give me a present later if you feel like it.”

“Sure thing.” Sheniver eased toward the door. “One thing though, Lew. You still got one hell of a right hand, Riker tells me. Suppose you tag the kid. By accident, maybe. Don’t push it. Don’t get ideas. We’ll have all the ideas, and we got plenty of ideas for the kid’s future.”

“Now I’m supposed to look scared?”

Sheniver showed a mouth full of oversized teeth. “That’s isn’t a bad idea, Lew. Not only do you maybe get worked over, but you never get another bout anywhere.”

“That would be bad,” Lew said, unsmiling.

Sheniver left. Lew took a shower. He ordered a small rare tenderloin, toast and tea. He was eating when the seconds Jud had recommended arrived. It was just five-thirty...

He went through the long concrete tunnel and dressed for the bout — shoes light and tight, black trunks fitting snugly, hands in binding white tape. He sat on the table, his legs swinging. Over the table was a green shade, a bright bulb. The reporters had left. He tried the mouthpiece, bit hard on it, then dried it off and handed it to his second. The man tucked it in the pocket of his white shirt. Lew wiped his face on the towel that hung around his neck. Once he thought he had heard more thunder. It had rumbled almost constantly just below the horizon ever since eight o’clock. But thunder was lost in the surf-sound of the crowd as they cheered the preliminary bouts. There was a calendar taped to the concrete wall. It was a picture of a pretty girl climbing over a fence; her skirt had caught on the fence, exposing an improbable area of pink, curving thigh. He looked at the girl on the calendar and tried to think of something besides the fight now at hand.

Jud Brock came in with an official to inspect the tape job on his hands. Jud winked dourly at Lew, gave his bare shoulder a quick shy pat.

“You like the salts between rounds?” the tall second asked.

“Only if I got a pair of glass eyes. Keep plenty of water on me.”

“Hell of a hot night for it.”

“Take it easy with the collodion. A little bit is plenty.”

“You a bleeder?”

“I cut easy over the eyes.”

“Here. I’ll rub some vaseline in your eyebrows. We’ll try to keep you greased. I... I don’t suppose you want no advice?”

“Only if you see something I seem to be missing. I’ll pace myself.”

They waited in silence. The crowd roared louder than before. He knew what it meant: A knockout in the semi-final. The back of his neck felt stiff as he waited for it; it came sooner than he expected: A loud hammering on the door.

“Okay! Front and center.”

Lew swung his feet up onto the table, stretched out, closed his eyes. “That’s us,” the tall second said in a worried tone.

“Take it easy. Let the kid sweat out there.”

“Sure.”

He tried to relax, but he was tight all over. He let the minutes go by. There was another irate hammering on the door. “Snap it up in there!”

“Coming right out,” Lew yelled. He didn’t move. He waited until he heard the heavy stomp of thousands of feet in unison, that time-worn gesture of crowd impatience. Then, he stood up slowly, and faked a stretch and yawn. The tall second hung the lightweight robe across his shoulders. The other one picked up the pail and the bottles. The tall second took the kit. They went out.

The sound was enormous in the corridor, like being inside a drum during parade. He went ahead, down the long, long aisle between the customers, hearing the rhythmic stomping falter and die away to be replaced by hooting and catcalls and a cheer much feebler than it would have been had he come out on time.

He went up between the ropes, saving his strength, sitting heavy on the stool, noting with grim pleasure that Sammy Hode was bounding nervously around in his corner, yanking at the ropes, grimacing at the crowd. The arc lights were blue-hot, and a swarm of dazed moths spiraled endlessly. A flunky attacked them with a DDT bomb while the crowd jeered. The moths, poisoned, banged senselessly around the ring. Lew made a mental note to maneuver Hode into the insects whenever he could. Make every break and take every break.

He closed his mind to the formalities, the announcements, the fighters and civic figures who clambered up to bow and then prance to each fighter to wish him luck. Lew sat with his eyes half-closed. It had been a long time since he had been stirred by the crowd or by the crowd noise. They were a necessary evil. To him it had always seemed as though all fights were conducted in dead empty silence, and only between rounds, or during a knockdown, did he become partially aware of the great breathing roaring beast beyond the perimeter of the lights.

He ambled out and listened to the “break when I say break” routine, and kept his eyes focused on Hode’s middle, noting with pleasure that the kid was breathing too fast, too hard. His big chance — a great big deal! Knock out old Lew Barry for the people! A punk kid — a wise kid. Smack him down where he belongs! Not up here with the pros, up here with the workmen... He felt the slow anger moving and turning inside of him. He felt the tightness of his face, felt with pleasure the alive weight of the slabbed muscles of his shoulders and arms. This is my business, sonny. Tonight you take a lesson. Tonight you yell for Mother.

The referee shoved the mike out of the way. The lights along the perimeter fence faded out. He went back to his corner. The tall second yanked off the robe and stuck out the mouthpiece. Lew tapped it in place with the tip of his new glove, broke the padding a little more across the knuckles, took two long slow pulls at the top ropes, bending his knees deep; then turned at the bell, shuffling out, chin safely behind his left shoulder to touch gloves with the eager bouncy kid.


The kid danced and pranced, and Lew shuffled stolidly after him, knowing that these first few moments would set the pattern of the bout. Five years dropped away as though they had never been. He knew that he had handled the training right. He had hit the best peak he could achieve, and hit it right on the button. The kid rapped him in the forehead with two brisk jabs and Lew, waiting for the right, saw the flicker of motion in time to stab it away with his left and thump his own right under the boy’s heart, solidly enough to make the crowd yell.


Sammy danced back, tried too fancy a shift and stumbled. He covered himself again with grotesque, ludicrous haste. Lew stepped back, lowering his arms, a grandstand play which got a cheer from the crowd. Hode danced back and darted in, and hit Lew one solid disconcerting smash before Lew tied him up in a clinch. In the clinch Lew found that the kid was no infighter. So Lew leaned contentedly on him, tying him up tightly, then working one arm free to hammer down onto the boy’s kidneys, two solid chopping blows of the kind that wear a man down. Yet it worried him that the boy had tagged him so readily. He had felt the blow before he had seen it. And hitting that sturdy opponent was like hitting hard rubber. His hands seemed to bounce off the rubbery interlaced muscles. A tough kid — no doubt of that.

They circled each other with sudden mutual caution, then Lew tried to open the boy up. He let the right go and saw, too late, that he was outsmarted. The boy came up inside with a hard left hook to Lew’s middle. It made him grunt. He touched Hode with two long harmless left jabs and at the bell they were circling.

Lew plodded over and slumped onto the stool, eyes half closed. He filled his mouth with water and let it run down his chest into the waistband of his trunks. It felt cool and good.

He stood up at the warning buzz, and, at the bell, let Hode come across the ring to him. Lew tried a classic foot-feint, pivoted, caught Hode a fraction off balance, and drove his best left home to the jaw. Hode bounced and shook his head and came in hard and fast. Lew tied him up in the corner after taking a hard smash under the eye. He leaned on the kid and felt dull discouragement. The kid could be tricked, but he was too fast to hurt. He hammered the kidneys again, then made a grandstand play of breaking clean.

The kid came in and suddenly Lew was sitting on the seat of his pants on the floor, his head ringing, his eyes temporarily unfocused. His head cleared quickly and he could have gotten up at the count of four. It bothered him that he hadn’t seen the punch coming. The kid was in a neutral corner, breathing hard, looking happy and confident. Lew took the full nine, came up, let his gloves be wiped on the referee’s shirt. He was conscious of the crowd’s roar. He moved away stiff-legged, and it suckered the kid into coming in fast for the kill. Lew moved to meet him with a right and a left and a right that were hard but seemed to do little damage. The kid bounded back uncertainly, circled and came in again. Another unseen blow rocked Lew badly and he hung on, forcing the referee to pry him loose from the clinch. The kid was coming in again as the bell sounded. Lew slouched gratefully onto the stool.

“What did he hit me with?” he said to the tall second.

“The knockdown? A left. And when you hung on, it was a right.”

“He’s too damn’ fast.”

The second grunted. Keep this up, Lew thought, and you’re going to take a hell of a licking. Nice clean fun. Nice sport for the youngsters. He thought of the slim, blonde, nervous girl. He remembered one of his first important fights, when an aging pug had worked him over neatly.

He was up just before the bell rang. Ivy was out there some place. Jack was watching his good old pal. This was a slick kid. A well-trained kid. He knew the whole book; learned it in college. Well, kid, we now give you a post-graduate course. We give you a master’s degree in the fight game. All from yours truly, Lew Barry, who has just decided that chivalry is dead.

He let the kid storm over to him and he covered up quickly, moved into a clinch. In the clinch he worked his left free, brought it up inside, rapping his wrist against the kid’s throat, then wiping the inside of the glove and laces up across the kid’s face, forcing his head up, using the leverage to force the kid away from him out of the clinch, then crossing the right hard against the kid’s cheek, twisting the glove in the moment of impact, splitting the flesh cleanly. The referee stormed in, shouldered him over to the ropes and bawled, “Fight clean!”

The kid was bleeding. Lew made himself smile and ceremoniously insisted on touching gloves. The kid looked puzzled. He bounced in, jabbing stiffly, and bringing the right hand home. Lew moved his head a fraction of an inch and the blow that would have felled him for the night missed. Lew groped his way into a clinch, and, letting himself go slack, he banged the cut cheek with his head. He heard the kid gasp. He hammered the kidneys, then trod heavily on the boy’s instep, wiped his glove upward across the kid’s face again.

The referee shouldered him over and said, “One more little deal like that and you lose the round.”

“Dear me,” Lew said thickly around the mouthpiece.

He smiled broadly at the kid and went out, both gloves outstretched. As the kid started to touch gloves, Lew banged him hard in the mouth, then muscled him back into a clinch, laying him against the ropes, leaning against him, hearing the irate boo of the crowd. He suddenly broke the clinch himself and, grasping the top rope in his left glove for leverage, hooked Hode hard with his right, hooked him on the injured cheek. Stung, Hode came after him. Lew bounced off the ropes and came forward, arms high, protecting his face, throwing himself into a clinch again as the kid tried futilely to get one clean punch home. In the clinch he spun the kid back against the ropes, burning his back. The bell sounded as the referee was yammering and prying at them. Lew had his shoulder comfortably tucked under Hode’s chin and he brought it up sharply after the bell.

Lew padded slowly to his corner and eased himself onto the stool. The crowd was booing him with a single voice. He decided mildly that he was unlikely to win any popularity contests. He looked idly across at the kid. They were pouring advice into both of the kid’s ears, but he didn’t seem to be listening. He was staring across at Lew and looked likely to break into tears. Hode had taken a humiliating roughing-up. He’d been hurt and outraged. Lew thought of all the times it had happened to him, of the times he had taken it and weathered it and refused to let it anger him beyond the point of caution. It was something Hode had to learn sooner or later, and this was as good a time as any. He checked his own body, felt the hint of putty in his legs, and the beginnings of pain in his left side.

At the fourth-round bell he let the kid come to him, as before. Lew blocked an overeager left, took a jolting right and fell into a clinch, working his elbows and shoulders against the kid, saying, over the crowd-roar, “May I have this dance?”

Hode cursed him and wasted his strength trying to break free. The referee pried them apart. As the referee went between them, Lew slammed a long looping right flush against the kid’s nose. Again the referee warned him. Lew smiled at the kid. Hode was close to tears. He came flailing in, all science forgotten, all skill ignored, intent only, like a small boy in a schoolyard, on inflicting maximum damage in the minimum length of time, wasting three wild roundhouse swings to land one. Lew could dimly hear the kid’s crew in his corner yelling to him to take it easy.


Lew let the slapping punches make dramatic sounds on his shoulders and the sides of his head. He smiled inwardly, planted himself flatfooted, picked his spot, and dropped the right on the exposed jaw of the maddened Hode. It dropped the boy and he scrambled up at the count of two, his eyes wet, his mouth contorted, windmilling his way in again, intent only on killing the mocking man who had humiliated him and knocked him down.

Lew rode the punches, and he was now in his element, now in control, now in the driver’s seat. The boy’s right eye was puffing shut. His mouth was cut. Lew dropped his weight onto his heels and made no attempt to feint or jab. He just kept himself covered, picked the spot again and dropped the short smashing overhand right on the exposed shelf of jaw.

Hode stood still, eyes, blank, arms dropping slowly. As he wavered, Lew coldly, clinically, put the right hand in exactly the same place, turned his back and walked to a neutral corner — hearing behind him the sudden tumble of heavy limbs and body onto the taut canvas. He turned in the corner and rested his arms along the top ropes, sucking the hot August air deep into his lungs through his open mouth.

At the count of seven, Hode, surprisingly, got his arms under him, pushed his shoulders up off the floor. At nine his arms crumpled and he fell back to lie still. Police came into the ring. Lew was comforted to see them. His hand was raised and the announcement was made:

“In two minutes and seven seconds of the fourth round—”

A cigar butt, thrown in fury, snapped against Lew’s forehead and the shower of sparks stung his left arm and shoulder. He showed no expression. He stayed well inside his cordon of police, and his seconds huddled near him. After the interminable walk, the dressing-room door closed off most of the subdued mutterings of the departing throng.

He said to the tall second, “Lock the door and find out who wants in each time. I’ll tell you who to let in.”

Lew stretched out on the table, listening to the gradually slowing thud of his heart, the diminishing tempo of his breathing. He rolled over and the other second worked with hard, deft fingers on the calves of his legs, on his shoulders and the nape of his neck. A long hot shower would help keep away some of the stiffness.

“Jud Brock outside,” the tall second said.

“Let him in alone.”

Jud came in. Lew sensed him standing by the table; he craned his neck and smiled up at Jud.

“The most popular man in town,” Jud said.

“I’m crying because nobody loves me any more.”

“It was the only way you could do it, wasn’t it? You’re an evil ol’ man, Lew.”

“If I hadn’t, somebody else would. You know that.”

“Are you making excuses?”

“No, Jud. It’s a man’s game, they tell me. And he turned out to be a boy.”

“A sad, wise boy at the moment. Going to stop in?”

“I guess not. Give him my love. Tell him to pick a new business.”

“He will. You lost me a good boy.”

“Not you. You wouldn’t stick after Sheniver took over.”

“No. So there’s no beef. That girl of his, she’ll probably send you Christmas cards from now on. Right now, you know, you could swing a title shot. Louis isn’t around any more. It might work.”

Lew sat up and waved the second away. “Thanks — that felt good... No, Jud, not me. And a funny reason I’ve got. 1 wasn’t having any fun out there. I was damn’ near bored. Know what I mean?”

“You mean the racket is a game for boys, and you grew up late. I haven’t any idea what I’m thanking you for, but thanks anyway. I got to go back and hold the kid’s hand.” Jud went toward the door and turned. “What’s with Jack?”

“I don’t know, Jud, and for some reason I don’t care.”


He took his long hot shower, and dressed slowly. It seemed a great effort to tie his shoes. He inspected himself in the mirror, fingered the swollen areas of soreness. His right hand was badly puffed. There were dimples where the knuckles should be. As he opened the door into the corridor, Jud came in quickly. His eyes were uncertain and the W. C. Fields nose was the only color in his face.

He said, “Better stay in here a while. Jack is coming along with company.”

“Why didn’t he beat it home?” Lew demanded angrily.

“He was waiting for a chance. They outwaited him. Here they come.”

Lew stood still for a moment, then stepped slowly out into the corridor. The scuff of shoes on concrete was a hollow sound in the corridor. Another fifty feet and they would be out in the dark night.

Jack Terrance walked reluctantly. Clyde Sheniver held one arm. The two strange young men were hulking, soft, sullen. One walked on the other side of Jack, and one directly behind him. Jack’s face was pasty gray and he tried to smile at Lew, but his lips trembled and the smile died out quickly.

Lew said easily, “Come on in here a minute, Jack. Want to have a word with you.”

Sheniver said, in his jovial, big-toothed way, “Jack’s got a date with me, Lew. And then maybe later you and me, we could have a little talk. What do you say?”

Lew moved over in front of them. The corridor was narrow. He saw Jud Brock swallow hard, then move gallantly out to stand near him.

“I’d like to talk to you now, Jack,” Lew said.

“You better get out of the way,” Clyde Sheniver said. “We got a little talk about money coming up.”

“Let him keep the money and you take the kid,” Lew said, trying to sound reasonable.

“Thirty big bills for a kid you spoiled? He won’t fight again.”

“You’ve got to give me a little time,” Jack said in a low earnest confidential tone, smiling into Clyde’s face.

Lew saw that the big, sullen kid behind Jack stood very close to him — a bit too close. In the cold glare of the corridor lights, Lew could see the pin-point pupils, the granular look of the skin of the soft face. He managed to move a bit closer. As Sheniver started to speak, Lew reached out fast, grabbed the front of Jack’s suit, yanked him, spinning, away from the trio, to trip and fall somewhere behind him. The naked blade of the switchknife was exposed, the blade that had been held against the small of Jack’s thick back. The soft white face contorted and as the blade flickered up, Lew kicked him as hard and as quickly as he could, spun and smashed his swollen right hand into the face of the other one.

Jack was on his feet again, and making a thin whining sound. Sheniver had put his back against the corridor wall. His mouth worked. Lew looked down into his face and said, “No — not this time. You had the word: I told you I’d put up a fight. I—”

But Sheniver’s eyes had switched to a point down the corridor, and Lew heard Jud’s hoarse yell of alarm, Clyde’s shrill yell of protest, the hard slap of shoe leather against concrete. Then Jack’s shoulder hit him and spun him away and he heard an odd sound. He turned. The creature he had kicked was on one knee, empty hand extended in a follow-through after having thrown something. The face was as empty as the hand, and it was a nightmare emptiness, more vicious than any expression could be. Jack stood in the harsh lights, feet planted, the haft of the knife protruding incongruously from the white fabric of his shirt just above the waistline, between the unbuttoned suit jacket.

He had an odd, proud, laughing look. Clyde Sheniver cursed the knifethrower in a shrill panicky voice. Then Jack said, and his voice was like a voice from long ago, “How many times do I have to save your neck, you stupid box-fighter?” And the echoing clamor of police whistles drowned the rest of his words.


Just after three a.m. Ivy came down the hospital corridor to the waiting-room and Lew got up stiffly. She looked at him almost without recognition, then came over and stood in front of him.

“They... they said it shouldn’t have been enough to... cause death, but it was his heart. Too much weight, too many cigars, late nights, drinking. And they said nobody should have let him walk to the ambulance.”

“There was no stopping him. He was like a kid proud of a black eye.”

“Oh, Lew, I—”

“Easy, now. I’ll get you home.”

She looked up at him, a child’s solemnity in her level eyes. “I can’t cry.” She touched her throat. “All knots, Lew. Right here.”

She leaned forward and, like a tired child, pressed her forehead against his chin, eyes downcast. He put his big arm around her shoulders with great gentleness. He turned her slowly: then, shortening his stride to match hers, he walked her slowly out of the hospital to the car. The rainstorm had come at one o’clock. The stars were out again. The air had a washed smell, incredibly new and clean. He knew she had been wrong. Sometimes there was a second chance. Somebody had to buy your second chance for you. The price was dear, and only a fool would waste it.

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