Sweet Addiction

CHAPTER 1

Her laughter was the first thing that caught his attention. Vibrant and shining. So effervescent and full of unfettered joy that it arrested him and he couldn’t remember what he’d been thinking just moments earlier.

He turned, seeking the source of the captivating music. And then he thought he’d heard it before. When he was much younger.

A lifetime ago.

Ren.

The memory of her still had the power to make him ache.

So much regret. Guilt. Wishful thinking. If only he had it to do all over again.

He hadn’t thought about her in a while now. Not because she’d slipped from his mind, but because he’d willed himself to stop thinking of the beautiful, shy eighteen-year-old girl who’d meant the world to him when he was in his early twenties.

It still hurt him to bring her to mind years later. She reminded him of mistakes he’d made. How he’d hurt her when it was the very last thing he’d ever wanted or intended.

He scanned the interior of the restaurant, his eyes sharp as he took in each table. But he couldn’t find the source of the burst of laughter, nor did he hear it again.

“Is something the matter?” Damon Roche asked.

Cole turned back to his friend and dinner companion and cast an apologetic glance in Serena Roche’s direction.

“No, nothing. I just thought I heard… I was reminded of someone I once knew.”

Damon slid his hand from Serena’s arm and picked up his glass of wine. His touch never strayed far from his wife. His now pregnant wife. If Damon had been possessive before—and he was forbiddingly possessive of Serena—he was even more so now that she was round with his child.

The two shared a nontraditional relationship. Serena was submissive to Damon’s dominance in and out of the bedroom. It was a relationship that made Cole envious, dangerously so. Spending time with the couple he called friends made him face his past mistakes. Made him realize that if he’d only been more careful and mindful in the past, he could even now be enjoying a relationship like Damon and Serena’s with a woman he’d loved with everything he had.

But he’d hurt her in his impatience and ignorance.

He’d met many women in the years since. Women who were beautiful, submissive, willing to submit to him on a permanent basis, but none had captured his heart like Ren. The one woman he couldn’t have.

Until recently he hadn’t done more than touch or prepare women who frequented The House, the exclusive club devoted to sexual largesse, owned by Damon Roche. Cole was a frequent visitor. Damon trusted him. Only Cole had been trusted with Serena, Damon’s beloved wife, and even then his role was just preparation.

Only with Angelina had he allowed himself to become more intimate, to actually have sex and open himself to the pleasure of having a woman go quiet at his touch and command. But a part of him realized that Angelina had reminded him of Ren. And Angelina belonged to Micah, another of Cole’s friends, one he shared with Damon.

All of the women he’d allowed himself to soften around belonged to other men. Maybe that was why he was willing to indulge with them, because he knew they were no threat to his heart and soul.

“Is the food to your liking, Serena mine?” Damon asked.

Serena smiled. “It’s divine. I only wish I could eat more. I swear this kid is wrapped around my stomach, squeezing for all it’s worth. I can’t eat more than a small amount at a time, but then I get hungry. The result is I eat all day!”

Damon chuckled and lifted a glass of water before pressing it gently to her lips. “You need to eat. You’ve not been sleeping well lately. Our child is wearing you out. The calories will give you more energy.”

“Or just make me fat and lazy,” Serena muttered.

“Are you still set on not knowing the sex?” Cole asked, trying to maintain polite conversation. But he was rattled and the laughter had opened the door to his past that he tried to keep shut at all times.

A wistful light entered Serena’s eyes. She was a beautiful woman. Startling blue eyes and shiny black hair. He’d been drawn to her as well even though there had never been a question of her belonging to Damon. But again, there was something about her that had reminded him of his childhood sweetheart, and he often found himself unable to look away from Serena. And wish that he hadn’t messed up so badly with Ren, that they could have been older. Cole could have been wiser. Could have guided her as Damon had guided Serena. Maybe Ren would still be with him now. His. Beautiful, submissive, his treasure.

“There are days when I really want to know,” she said. She glanced over at Damon and smiled. “I made Damon promise not to let me cave even though he wants to know very badly whether we’re having a son or a daughter. He really wants a girl. I don’t care and maybe that’s why I want to be surprised.”

“Another girl in the fold would be entertaining,” Cole said. “I imagine Damon will be just as bad as Micah when it comes to his little girl.”

Serena rolled her eyes. “Oh God, don’t you know it?”

“She’s threatening to make me wear one of those damn baby carriers that Micah parades around in,” Damon said dryly. “He’s lost his goddamn mind ever since Nia was born.”

Cole snickered. “I’m going to remind you of this conversation when your own child is born. You’re overprotective of Serena as it is. I can’t imagine you’ll be any less so of the baby. Especially if you have a daughter.”

“Maybe, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to wear her twenty-four seven,” Damon said darkly.

Serena just grinned and stroked her fingers over Damon’s hand. Cole winked at her as if to say he agreed with her private assessment.

Distant laughter sounded again, sending a cascade of chill bumps up his neck. This time he reacted much quicker and jerked around, his gaze honing in on the source.

Finally, he saw her.

All his breath left him in a ragged rush. She was facing away, which was why he hadn’t been able to find her the first time. He could just see the hint of her profile. Smooth, dusky skin, creamy, beckoning his touch. A cascade of black hair tumbled down her back, going so low that he lost track of it.

She was petite. He could tell from here that she was a small woman, probably not much more than five feet. Her features were delicate. As she turned, he caught a glimpse of the slim column of her neck, but then she reached up and pulled her hair over one shoulder, baring the expanse of her back.

Her dress was backless and he froze as his gaze lighted on the tattoo trailing down her spine.

He couldn’t breathe. His fingers curled and uncurled as he stared, riveted to the sight. Almost in dread, he raised his gaze to her right shoulder, just over the blade. Would it still be there? Had the years been kind and diminished the reminder of his inexperience?

He couldn’t tell from this distance. Or maybe he didn’t want it to be there. A scar. Evidence of the care he hadn’t taken with a woman who trusted him with her heart and body.

Ren.

What was she doing here? It was her. The tattoo was unmistakable. Delicate and feminine. Just like her. A thin, scripty flowering vine from the small of her back to her nape. He’d traced it many times with his fingers, his mouth and his tongue.

Before he could get to his feet, the man sitting with Ren stood and extended his hand to her. She took it and gracefully rose from her seat. The man’s hold was possessive and intimate, a clear signal that he considered her his.

But when Ren turned where he could see her fully, Cole saw the wide silver band encircling her neck. It was a fist to his gut and he could only stare, so stunned that he couldn’t draw a breath.

He knew the significance of that piece of jewelry. It wasn’t decorative, although it was beautifully rendered and drew attention to her delicate features.

It was a sign of ownership.

A gift from a master to his submissive.

Serena wore such a symbol, but hers was a band that encircled her upper arm. Damon wasn’t a fan of collars. He found them demeaning. Cole agreed.

The surge of jealousy—and anger—that bolted through his veins took him completely off guard.

The man put his arm protectively around Ren, and she smiled up at him as they made their way to the exit. Power emanated from the man—a worthy adversary.

“Do you know him?” Cole asked urgently, glancing quickly back at Damon.

Damon’s gaze jerked up, his brow creased in confusion.

“The man there, with the Asian woman. They’re walking out now.”

“Why would you think I know…” Damon frowned and leaned forward. “Yes, I do, actually.”

“Who is he?” Cole demanded.

“He’s visited The House before, but not often. He prefers to keep to himself.”

“Who?” Cole asked again, his impatience an edgy burn under his skin.

“Lucas Holt.”

“What’s his story? Is he into the scene or is he just someone playing at the game?”

“He’s serious,” Damon said slowly. “His background checked out or he wouldn’t have been admitted to The House. He’s wealthy. Successful businessman. Owns several clubs both in Houston and Dallas. I think he recently opened one in Vegas. He spends a lot of time in Vegas but he has residences in Dallas and Houston as well.”

“Have you ever seen her at The House?” Cole asked. How close had she been all this time? Had they barely missed each other? Had she been present in the very place he frequented?

His pulse ratcheted up and he stood, the urge to go after her so strong that he was almost in motion when Damon spoke again.

“Sit down, Cole. Don’t make a scene. I’ll tell you what I know.”

Reluctantly, Cole retook his seat but watched the pair until they disappeared from view.

“Who is she?” Serena asked in a low tone.

She put a gentle hand on his arm, a gesture of comfort he appreciated, though it took everything he had not to snatch his hand back and go chasing after Ren.

Ren.

God. He couldn’t believe it. She was here. And she belonged, really belonged, to another man. There was a clear stamp of ownership for the world to see. He couldn’t even wrap his mind around it. He’d never imagined that Ren would have gone from their failed experimentation into a submissive relationship.

Jealousy. Anger. Rage.

Excitement.

Longing ate at his gut until his stomach churned and the food he’d eaten knotted into a giant fist.

“Tell me,” he rasped in Damon’s direction. He ignored Serena’s question for now. He had to know all he could about Ren.

Damon calmly sipped his wine, almost as if he were trying to infuse some of that calm into Cole. “I haven’t seen her at The House. But it’s been quite some time since I’ve seen Lucas. He isn’t big into the scene or into public displays for that matter.”

“Who did you see him with?” Cole bit out.

“He doesn’t bring his submissives to the club. When I saw him last, he was simply there to observe. He’s extremely private. He only has one woman at any given time. He’s loyal and he demands the same, but his relationships aren’t permanent.”

Cole frowned. “He’s a player?”

Damon shook his head. “I never got that impression. I’ve spoken to him before. Had drinks with him. He finds comfort in the women in his keeping. Most interestingly, he is completely faithful to his submissive. However, he has discreetly inquired in the past as to men for his woman. I think he likes to watch. Perhaps he even participates. But he himself only has sex with the woman in his care.”

“How the hell do you know all of this?” Cole demanded.

Christ, like he wanted to imagine Ren with other men while the bastard watched? He was a flaming hypocrite. He wasn’t so pissed he didn’t recognize the blatant hypocrisy in his anger. He’d had sex with a woman who belonged to another man. He’d indulged in Angelina more than once at Micah’s urging.

Damon shrugged. “We’ve talked on occasion. He’s asked for recommendations.”

Serena’s brow furrowed. “Are you trying to delicately state that you’ve been with some of his women?”

Damon smiled and lazily ran his fingers over her shoulder. “No, Serena mine. You of all people should know I don’t share. Even another man’s woman. I don’t look down on the practice. However, it isn’t for me.”

“I need to see her,” Cole said tightly. “I… have …to see her.”

“Is she important to you?” Serena asked, her blue gaze studying him intently.

“She used to be everything to me.”

Damon lifted an eyebrow. “I wondered.”

Cole sent him a questioning look.

“Let’s face it. You’ve had your pick of beautiful, willing women all but throwing themselves at your feet,” Damon said dryly. “And yet you’ve shunned them all. That speaks of a man whose focus is elsewhere.”

“I hurt her,” Cole said in a low voice. “I was young, arrogant, stupid. I abused her trust. She gave herself to me. She believed I wouldn’t hurt her. I did.”

Serena’s face crinkled in sympathy. Damon simply stared back, silent.

“I need to know how to find her,” Cole said. “I have to see her.”

Damon sighed. “I can invite Lucas to The House. That’s all I can do. I can’t give you anything else. He’s extremely private. Such a breach would be unforgiveable to him.”

“Then invite him. Make damn sure he brings Ren,” Cole growled. “I’ll turn this whole damn city over if I have to.”

Damon leveled his gaze at Cole. “What will you do if Lucas comes?”

“I don’t know yet. But I’m damn sure not going to sit back and do nothing. I have to see her. Damn it, she was mine.”

“And yet you didn’t keep her,” Damon returned.

Cole flinched at the reminder. No, he hadn’t kept her. He’d walked away. And he’d never found anyone who could occupy the same place in his heart.

CHAPTER 2

“On your knees.”

Ren slid gracefully to her knees, thighs open, lips parted, hands resting palms up on her legs. She waited patiently for Lucas’s next instruction, her gaze trained straight ahead.

“You were beautiful tonight, Ren. But then you’re always beautiful and graceful. I’ve no complaint in that area.”

“Thank you, Lucas.”

“As a reward, I’ll let you choose tonight’s instrument.”

“Your hand,” she said without hesitation.

He smiled and she thought he liked her choice. “Tell me why.”

“I like having the imprint of your hand on my skin. It’s a reminder that I belong to you. That you possess me.”

He nodded his agreement. “Open your mouth. Wider. No teeth. If your teeth touch me, you’ll be punished.”

The words were said more for effect than a true warning. Arousal rose, sharp and aching, within her. He knew how his words would fan the flames of her desire. Above all else, she enjoyed the sweet kiss of pain when he saw fit to give it to her.

If she weren’t so disciplined, she’d graze her teeth across his rigid length, but they played no games. No silly pretense of disobedience so he would punish her. They both had needs and they fulfilled each other’s need perfectly.

She supposed in a way that Lucas cared for her. Emotion had little to do with their relationship. He gave her something far more powerful than love. He provided security and comfort. He protected her, and in return, she gave him her submission, her complete obedience and her respect.

His cock slid over her lips and then over her tongue. She savored the first burst of musk and inhaled his masculine scent. He was rougher tonight, not as patient as he typically was.

He thrust deep, holding there until her chest burned. Then he pulled back and she sucked in a deep breath. He framed her face in his hands and slid his fingers around to the back of her head until they dug into her scalp. Then he thrust again, harder this time.

It was then she realized he was trying to draw her teeth. He wanted to punish her. He was in a mood tonight. He wanted to exert mastery over her, push her limits. For a moment she considered giving in and allowing him the bite of her teeth, but he wouldn’t want that either.

He was her master, yes, but he didn’t want a weak woman or one who gave in too easily to his silent demands. Yes, she was obedient, absolutely. But only to commands he voiced. If he wanted to punish her, he would, but she wouldn’t be an easy conquest for him.

She relaxed further around his impressive girth and allowed him to slide deeper into her throat. He made a sound that was a mixture of approval and frustration. He didn’t want her to give in.

And for that reason, he withheld his release for longer than usual. He was rough, relentless, and he showed no mercy. He was determined to push her past her limits, and she was determined to show him she had none.

She purposely blanked herself to everything but the task at hand. Outlasting him.

With a muttered curse, he tightened his hands on her head and poured himself into her throat, forcing her to swallow every single drop. When he finally released her, she rocked back on her heels, dazed by the power of the exchange.

Lucas breathed harshly as he slowly withdrew from her mouth. His grip gentled and he slid his fingers back along the line of her cheekbones before wiping his semen from her lips.

“So fiercely determined,” he murmured. “I wonder what it would take to break that restraint.”

Ren didn’t flinch because she knew Lucas wouldn’t do it. He had no interest in breaking her. Eventually he’d grow bored with her just as he’d grown bored with his previous possessions. And when he did, she would be cast adrift again.

He saw her as a challenge. She knew without false modesty that she intrigued him far more than the previous women he’d owned. It wasn’t intentional. It was just who she was. She knew what she wanted and what she needed. She had nothing to prove. She wasn’t interested in impressing her master. She did only what she needed to do in order to have her needs met. Pleasing the man she gave herself to was a need.

He held his hand down to her and she accepted the wordless command. He helped her to her feet and then guided her toward the plush leather chair where much of her pleasure and pain were doled out.

He settled onto the seat, still nude, his muscular legs splayed. His cock was semi-erect. Thick and long, it lay over the top of his thigh and she stared, suddenly overtaken by the urge to have it deep inside her body, taking, demanding.

More likely he would thrust it into her ass when he was through spanking it.

He pulled her between his legs, allowing his hands to smooth up her body, wandering over her curves, up to cup her full breasts.

Her breasts were a source of fascination for him. She was otherwise slender. Slim hips, flat belly, slender legs. She was slightly built and delicate, and he loved that sense of fragility about her that hid a core of steel.

But her breasts were full and plump, a contradiction to the rest of her otherwise boyish figure.

He toyed with her dark nipples, plucking gently at them until they were hard and pointed. But he didn’t do as she wanted. He didn’t take them into his mouth and suck.

“I’m glad you chose my hand.”

He bent her over, positioning her so that she was draped across his lap, her head toward the floor. He tucked his leg over the backs of her knees and then rubbed his hand over her buttocks.

She shivered and he chuckled softly. He loved to draw out her pleasure. Tease her mercilessly. He was hard. No doubt about that. He was ruthless, even. But he was fair and a generous lover. He knew what pleased her and never hesitated to give her what she needed.

Were their needs not so closely aligned, perhaps it would be a different matter. Perhaps he wouldn’t be as generous as he was. But they craved the same things. Him taking his pleasure spurred her own.

The smack of his hand against her behind startled her from her sensual thoughts. Fire licked up her spine when he followed the first blow with another in rapid succession.

He alternated splaying his fingers and keeping them tightly held together so the sensation was different each time he struck her flesh.

She moaned and stirred restlessly but his hold tightened on her until she was powerless to move and it only heightened her desire.

This was what she craved beyond all else. To be held completely in a man’s power. To know that she had no choice but to accept whatever it was he wanted to do to her. The knowledge was dark and edgy. It made her skate along that forbidden line where it was easy to fall off into complete darkness.

How far would she go? How far would she allow Lucas to go? She’d never answered that question. Had never entertained allowing things to go that far.

She trusted Lucas. Implicitly. But maybe even he didn’t trust himself to push beyond the tightly controlled boundaries they’d erected.

He continued to mete out the spanking, but it was a ludicrous word that in no way described the dance they performed. This was no spanking for an undisciplined sub. This was as sexual as fucking, more powerful than kissing.

This was where she got her high. Where she got so pumped on lust that she’d literally let him take her wherever she wanted to go.

She was barely aware when he pushed her to the floor, forced her cheek to the carpet and held her head down, his hand tangled in her hair.

He mounted over her—rough, crude, possessive—like she was a bitch in heat. He thrust first into her pussy and then dragged his cock out and up the seam of her ass. With his free hand, he applied a liberal amount of lubricant, but tonight she didn’t even want that. She wanted it hard. She wanted it to hurt. She craved the rough bite of pain when he forced his way past her unwilling opening.

His hand tightened in her hair and he growled low in his throat. “Open to me. Let me take what’s mine.”

As he knew they would, the words sent her over the edge. She arched up, desperate for his possession. He fit his cock to the tight ring and pushed hard.

She cried out but he yanked upward on her hair until she quieted.

“That’s it,” he said in a harsh, low voice. “Be silent and take it. You’re mine, Ren. Never forget that. I own you.”

He powered inside her and held himself deep, cupped over her body, covering every inch of her flesh.

She trembled. Her entire body shook as she fought the orgasm that built like a hurricane.

He laughed and reached underneath to press the flat of his hand to her belly. He slid his fingers down to the juncture of her legs and lightly touched her clit.

She clenched her teeth, closed her eyes and willed herself to control the reaction.

He was a master at knowing her body. Knowing what she loved. He knew how to talk to her, what words aroused her. How hard to take her. When to be rough and when to be gentle.

His fingers slid even lower, toying with the entrance to her pussy. He fingered her roughly as his cock twitched deep inside her ass. Then he withdrew, dragging that huge erection over distended flesh.

She moaned again and let out a sigh.

“No, Ren, you don’t get to come yet. I’m going to fuck you for a good long while and you’re going to be a good girl and you’re going to take it up the ass and keep taking it until I tell you to come. And then I’m going to fill your ass full of my cum and you’re going to beg me for more.”

And she would. She closed her eyes. She’d beg him never to stop. He’d come inside her and then he’d go back to fucking her until his hot liquid ran down her leg. And she’d love every damn minute of it.

CHAPTER 3

Ren stretched and glanced up at the clock. She grimaced. It was time for a break. Lucas insisted she not work to the exclusion of all else. It annoyed her sometimes, but the simple fact was, that if he didn’t interfere, she’d forget to eat, wouldn’t sleep and would work tirelessly until she collapsed.

And well, she was in touch enough with her feminine wants and needs to know that she loved that he took such good care of her. She needed that.

She put down the pencil she’d made preliminary sketches with, carefully pushed her drawings into an orderly pile and closed her sketchbook so the weight would prevent them from falling out.

Deadlines had little meaning to her. Once she got inspiration for the story she wanted to tell and the images began dancing in her mind, she was driven to work until the book was completed. Often that meant finishing well ahead of her deadline. It was an illness, this compulsion to be early. But it was who she was and it served her well in her career as an author of children’s books.

Rennie Michaels. A slight variation of her real name. It sounded light and fun and on the level with the children who she wrote for.

She got up from her desk and rubbed absently at a kink in her neck. When she looked up, to her surprise, Lucas was leaning against the doorframe, his lazy gaze stroking lightly over her body.

He didn’t often come into her studio. It was the one place that was hers. It was provided by him and he insisted that she be able to maintain her privacy here. Anywhere else in his home, she was his. There was no privacy. She belonged to him and he could intrude at will. But here was her work place and her place to be alone with her thoughts. It was off limits to him, a condition he himself had put into place.

She stood still, unsure of what he wanted her to do.

He pushed off the doorframe and walked into her studio, hands shoved into his jeans pocket. He was barefooted, as he typically was in his home. For a man as wealthy and cultured as he was, in his private sanctuary he was a creature of comfort, usually in well-worn jeans, a T-shirt and sometimes flip-flops.

“We’ve received an invitation,” he said when he stopped in front of her.

She arched one eyebrow. She didn’t know anyone here. She and Lucas had met in his Las Vegas nightclub a year ago. She’d been out of sorts because her last relationship had been a complete disaster and he’d been an immediate source of security. He’d taken her home with him that night and they’d been together ever since.

She was honest enough with herself to know she’d used him in the beginning. He knew it also and was unbothered by it. She cared about him now. In a lot of ways, he was her best friend. Theirs was an odd friendship to be sure, but it worked for both parties.

“A friend of mine who owns a private club has invited us both to attend an intimate gathering in three nights’ time.”

She frowned. “What kind of private club and what kind of intimate gathering?”

He flashed that lazy grin. “You know very well what kind of club. You aren’t stupid, Ren.”

“Have I met this friend?”

He shook his head. “The last time I saw him was right before I left for Vegas the time you and I met.”

“And what are we supposed to …do …at this intimate gathering?”

He touched her then. Smoothed his hand up her arm, a gesture meant to reassure her. And it did.

“You know very well I’m not into public displays of dominance. I sense you aren’t either, though we’ve never really discussed it. I’ve been blunt about the fact I find it distasteful and we’ve adhered to my wishes on the subject. But tell me, Ren, does the idea of being played with in front of others turn you on?”

She wrinkled her nose. “What we do isn’t playing, Lucas. It’s not a game. And it’s …private. At least to the extent of it not being a public spectacle. Is that what your friend wants?”

She knew that it was a particular kink of Lucas’s to watch while another man fucked the woman he owned. He’d told her about his past submissives and how turned on he was by watching another man not only possess her but command her.

Interestingly enough, he’d never invited another man to fuck her, and Ren couldn’t decide if she was happy or disappointed. She wouldn’t lie. In some ways the idea titillated her and made all her girly parts tingle. There was something extremely naughty and forbidden about having the man who owned you give you to another man to do with as he wished.

A shiver went up her spine and she decided that yes, the idea did turn her on. It turned her on very much. But the public display of mastery? Not so much. It reeked of showmanship. Of some fake, hyped-up display of testosterone that did nothing for her. She loved the quiet relationship she shared with Lucas.

“No, I don’t think that’s what he wants at all. I think what he wants is our company for the evening. He’s a lot like I am. We share a lot of the same tastes but perhaps he’s a little more possessive than I am when it comes to his woman.”

Both her brows rose at that and Lucas smiled. “He doesn’t share his woman under any circumstance. I find I don’t mind if the situation is right.”

“So he wants our company, but he wants us to come to his club,” she said slowly. “Why not invite us to dinner? Or out for drinks?”

Lucas shrugged. “For the same reason I entertain guests at my clubs. We’re both private people and as such I’m sure he’s as picky about who he allows into his sanctuary as I am. It’s a neutral place and yet perhaps more intimate than a restaurant or a bar.”

“If you wish me to accompany you, you know that I will.”

He nodded. “I know this. But I’d like to know if you have a desire to go or if you will go only because you think it pleases me.”

Her brow furrowed. This didn’t sound like Lucas. He was a man who commanded. He was arrogant. Not obnoxiously so, but he was very comfortable wearing the mantle of authority. He expected obedience. He’d never been particularly concerned with whether she truly wished to accompany him someplace.

It made him sound like an unfeeling bastard. It wasn’t so. If she wasn’t feeling well or was busy with work, he didn’t expect her to accommodate his wishes. He was very good at picking up on her moods and her health. He often knew before she did when she was getting sick.

He took excellent care of her. She had no complaint there. But if there was no solid reason for her to be unable to attend something he wished her to be present for, she went. He didn’t offer her a choice.

“I don’t know that I have a preference one way or the other,” she said honestly. “You know I love to please you. I don’t know this friend, so obviously I have no investment in seeing him. I suppose if there is kinky sex to view that might entice me to be more eager to go.”

She finished with a small grin and he laughed, shaking his head.

“I love how uninhibited you are and how unapologetic you are about loving sex. I wonder if you even know how desirable it makes you in my eyes. There is something intensely sexy about a strong woman who’s confident in her sexuality and furthermore celebrates it.”

Her cheeks grew hot at the uncharacteristic praise. His eyes were warm and he seemed so mellow today. It made her want to please him even more.

“Then we should go. You never know. Maybe we’ll learn something new and can practice it after we return home,” she said cheekily.

He pulled her into his side and stroked his hand down her back and down to cup her ass. She loved that he frequently touched her. And not just touched her but was possessive about it. He often did so in public, like he was telling the world that she belonged to him. That he was proud she belonged to him.

With his other hand, he absently ran a finger over the platinum collar around her neck. Then he slid his finger between it and her skin and pulled her forcefully forward until their mouths were a mere breath apart.

He kissed her, savaging her mouth until her lips were swollen and tender. After a moment, he removed his hand and carefully eased her away.

“We’ll go. I’ll buy something new for you to wear. I have something killer in mind. I may not want to demonstrate my authority over you in public, but I want every male in the place to look at you with lust in their eyes and know that you belong to me.”

She smiled because she loved it when he got all growly and possessive. He oftern took her to his clubs and for all practical purposes he kept her on a leash. There wasn’t a person in the club who couldn’t clearly see his stamp of possession all over her.

And for her part, she didn’t give a damn who knew the nature of their relationship. She felt no shame whatsoever for anyone to know that she served Lucas in all aspects and that she looked to him for absolute protection and care.

“Now let’s go eat. You need a break and I’ve encroached on your private quarters long enough. Afterward I feel a distinct need to fuck you for the entire afternoon.”

CHAPTER 4

Damon laced his fingers through Serena’s and brought her hand to his lips. It seemed such a natural action and Cole wondered if Damon even knew how frequently he touched and kissed his wife. It was done absently as if the habit was so strong he did it without realizing.

Serena was dressed tonight. Cole had noticed that since Serena’s belly had begun to swell and the evidence of her pregnancy was so clearly visible that Damon had clamped down, almost as if he wanted no one but himself to see his pregnant wife.

Before, it was a common sight for Cole to come into The House when Damon was present and see Serena spread, waiting for the kiss of the flogger. Often Cole prepared her for Damon, clamping her or tying her in various positions.

But these days, no one but Damon touched her, and he’d become intensely private about putting his lover on display. He damn sure hadn’t so much as touched her with anything but the most gentle of hands since the start of her pregnancy. He showered her with affection both in public and in private. Cole wondered if having a child would alter Damon’s practices on a permanent basis.

In fact, were it not for Damon having invited Lucas and Ren and wanting Serena to act as his social hostess, Cole doubted Serena would even be at The House. The further Serena got into her pregnancy, the more protective Damon became of her. He himself didn’t spend very much time at The House these days. He left the running to his manager and gave Cole leeway to oversee as he pleased.

Cole shoved his hands into his expensive slacks and looked at the entrance to the social room for the hundredth time since he’d arrived. Damon had assured him that Lucas had accepted his invitation and that he would be present, but Cole’s impatience was a living, breathing demon within him.

“Cool it, man,” Damon murmured beside him. “Go get a drink. Relax. Have you even given a thought to what you’ll say? You don’t want to cause an awkward scene. I don’t think that’s the impression you want to make when you haven’t seen her in so many years. And it wouldn’t do to insult Lucas. A submissive is quite protective of their master. If she feels you’re disrespecting Lucas, it could go badly.”

“I know all of that,” Cole said. “I may have been stupid once. But—”

Damon held up a hand in apology. “I have every faith in your knowledge, Cole. Or I would have never trusted you with what I treasure most in the world.”

Cole turned, taking Damon’s suggestion that he go collect a drink and calm the fuck down. He wasn’t used to the wildness of his emotional state. He was calm. He lived his life in a calm, reflective manner. Nothing rattled him.

Except Ren.

Always Ren.

She alone had the power to unhinge him.

He picked up a glass of wine and brought it to his mouth. The flavor was excellent. Damon had very good tastes. Expensive tastes.

He sighed and turned around, his gaze taking in the room once more. And then he froze.

Lucas Holt stood in the doorway, Ren at his side.

Cole drank in the sight of her. He couldn’t look away. While she’d always been beautiful, she’d grown into a gorgeous, mature woman who lacked the slight edge of youth to her features.

She was petite—she’d always been a small thing—barely reaching Lucas’s shoulder. Her shiny black hair was flowing over her shoulders and down her back, wild and beautiful like her.

And her eyes. The slight lilt at the corners signified her half-Korean heritage, but they weren’t dark. Instead they were a lush green with flecks of warm brown swirled until they became an unusual shade. They were vibrant, almost glowing, even across the distance.

She was so perfect she made him ache.

His gaze wandered over her as Lucas made his way toward Damon. She wore tight jeans that molded to her slim hips and ass. Low slung so that her belly button ring was bared and winked daringly at him.

Her top was barely much at all. She wore no bra and the silky material of her top clung to the generous swells of her breasts. It tied around her neck and completely bared her back and that tattoo Cole was so intimately familiar with. He’d taken her to have the ink done. To mark the occasion of her eighteenth birthday.

She smiled at Damon as Lucas introduced her. She sparkled. There was no other word for her. She wore a vivacious, confident smile. Not once did she look around to see if others were watching her or were curious about her. She was focused entirely on Lucas.

Jealousy knotted Cole’s gut. He hated that feeling. It was irrational. Jealousy was a stupid, pointless emotion that never brought anything but more frustration and a sense of helplessness. It wasn’t something he was familiar with. Until now.

He wanted her to look at him that way. She had once. She’d looked at him as though he were the only man in the world.

Why had she sought out a relationship like this? Cole hadn’t imagined that she’d ever want any part of the lifestyle. He had botched things so badly with Ren. He’d been nothing more than a boy playing at being someone’s keeper. He’d abused her trust and it was something that still ate at him to this day.

Damon glanced his way, but Cole was still rooted to the spot, unable to move as he stared at Ren. He suddenly felt unsure and he hated that feeling above all others.

He considered himself a confident man. He’d been successful early in life, driven by ambition that certainly couldn’t be attributed to insecurity. His only missteps had been with Ren, and maybe that was why he was now faced with hesitancy.

Ren and Lucas moved away from Damon. Lucas put his hand to Ren’s bare back and shot her a quick look of affection—and approval. Then he directed her toward the bar. Exactly where Cole was standing, staring at the only woman to ever fully capture his heart.

Ren glanced around the room, a little surprised by how posh and …sedate …it looked. It was like attending any other cocktail party. Who would even know that this place was devoted to sexual practices that didn’t fall into the traditional realm.

Damon and his wife had been exceedingly gracious. Serena was elegant and most definitely submissive, but it was obvious that Damon adored her. And truly there was nothing more attractive to her than a man who clearly adored his woman.

“What would you like to drink, Ren?” Lucas asked.

She blinked and turned back from her perusal of the room. It was then she saw him, standing just a few feet away, his blue eyes burning into her. She stared back in shock, in awareness. Even after so many years, her heart leapt and her skin tingled in remembrance.

He hadn’t changed. Well, maybe that wasn’t entirely true. The youthful, handsome features of his early twenties had been replaced by the handsome ruggedness of age. He was tall but not as lanky as he’d been when she’d been with him. He’d filled out. Solid. Strong.

Power emanated from him. Controlled power. It was as though he boiled just below the surface but outwardly projected calm and con fidence.

She shivered as his gaze skirted over her. He recognized her too, and she was instantly aware of the hunger in his eyes. She felt hunted, and it was a delicious sensation.

“Cole.”

It came out as a whisper, barely discernible in the quiet din of mingled voices and random conversation. But he heard her. Acknowledged the address with a step forward.

“Ren.”

She nearly moaned. Her name was a caress, sliding off his tongue with all the practice that had made her name an endearment. He’d always said her name like she was the most special thing in his world. With reverence. With …love.

Lucas’s hold suddenly tightened on her. She knew that touch. It was possessive. A clear hands-off to an intruder. It was his way of saying mine. It was rare indeed for Lucas to assume such a posture. He didn’t often see another man as a threat. The fact that he did so now told her all too clearly that the electric tension between her and Cole was plainly evident.

“It’s good to see you again,” Cole said quietly. “You look beautiful. But then, you always have.”

Her heart squeezed and for a moment she worried that she’d be rendered unable to speak. She swallowed and tried to control the fact that her knees shook with nervousness.

“You’re looking good too, Cole. How are you?”

It was an awkward, stilted conversation that only grew more uncomfortable with each passing second. Lucas sensed her disquiet and pulled her further into the protection of his body.

“Ren, introduce me to your friend,” Lucas said in an easy, casual tone that completely belied the tension she felt in his coiled muscles.

Ren broke her gaze and looked up at Lucas. Then back at Cole. “Lucas, this is Cole Madison, an old friend of mine. Cole, this is Lucas Holt.”

Lucas made no move to release her so he could shake Cole’s hand, but then neither did Cole make an effort to do more than nod in Lucas’s direction.

“A former lover,” Lucas said, a slight lift at the corner of his mouth.

Ren nodded. She was always truthful with Lucas. Theirs was an open and honest relationship. She’d met Lucas’s previous lovers in the past. He hadn’t tried to hide them from her. Neither would she hide her previous relationship with Cole.

“We were a hell of a lot more than that,” Cole said bluntly.

Lucas’s eyebrow arched and he stared coolly at Cole. “Were you now?”

“Were is the operative word,” Ren said quietly. “Cole chose a life that didn’t include me. It’s in the past.”

It was strange to be having such a direct conversation. Weren’t encounters with former lovers supposed to be filled with silly small talk and clear avoidance of the depth of the relationship? Weren’t they supposed to pretend that neither mattered to the other?

“I made a mistake.”

Nothing Cole said could have shocked her more than this. Her eyes widened and she went still against Lucas. An action that didn’t go unnoticed by the man she belonged to.

“Then I must be very grateful for your mistake,” Lucas said in a deceptively soft voice. “For she is now my greatest treasure.”

Ren’s eyes narrowed and she looked up at Lucas, baffled by his statement. They simply didn’t have that kind of relationship. Did he value her? Absolutely. Ren had no doubt as to that. Friendship. Respect. He offered her protection. She gave him her absolute obedience and submission. But never had they been into flowery descriptors that came far too close at hinting at deeper feelings.

Or maybe it was a male posturing thing that had to do with entirely too much testosterone.

Suddenly the tension was too much for her to bear. She didn’t want Cole to see how undone she was by his presence. By his admission that he’d made a mistake!

She turned her chin upward so she could look at Lucas. “Excuse me. I need to go to the ladies’ room.”

His hold loosened on her and he pressed a quick kiss to her forehead. “Of course. I’ll be waiting here. What would you like to drink?”

“Something strong,” she said, not realizing how much it said about her current state. “You choose.”

She slipped away, not even knowing where the bathroom was, but more important, she just needed to get away to collect herself.

Once in the hallway, she glanced right and left and chose right since she and Lucas had entered from the left and she hadn’t thought they’d passed a bathroom.

She finally found what she was looking for and slipped inside, locking the door behind her. She leaned against the vanity, her hands gripping the edge as she stared at her reflection in the mirror.

She looked …shocked. Unsteady. Her eyes had a bewildered look. Her pulse was too rapid and the pressure in her chest was ever increasing.

It wasn’t as if she thought of Cole on a daily basis. Quite the opposite. She’d made peace with his defection a long time ago.

Really, Ren? Is that why you’re standing here out of sorts? Because you made peace with the man you adored beyond reason who left you after awakening a fire inside you that has never been extinguished?

She ran water over her shaking hands but was careful not to mess up the light makeup she’d applied before arriving. She didn’t want any sign of her disturbance to be evident.

When she finally managed to hold out her hand and see no noticeable tremble, she turned off the water and dried her hands.

A knock at the door startled her.

“Ren, open the door.”

Lucas she might have expected. But it was Cole standing just two feet away and suddenly her hands shook so hard that she had no hope of regaining her composure.

CHAPTER 5

Ren briefly contemplated refusing but then she realized she was huddling in a bathroom hiding for God’s sake. She opened the door, flicked her hair over her shoulder and arched one eyebrow as she stared back at Cole.

He filled the doorway. Big. Broad shouldered. So damn good-ooking that she couldn’t help but stare.

Time had been extraordinarily good to him. It wasn’t fair. If there was any justice, he’d be balding, sporting a potbelly and married with two point five bratty children and a wife who nagged him on a daily basis.

“What do you want?” she asked.

He stared at her a moment longer, his gaze stroking over her as surely as if he caressed her with his hand. “You, Ren. I want you.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. If she weren’t so flabbergasted, she’d laugh. Lucas. Cole. Herself. All apparently blunt people who didn’t play coy games and pretend they were unaffected.

So many things were on the tip of her tongue, but in the end, none of them mattered and all were better left unsaid. They solved nothing. So instead, she spoke a simple truth.

“Even if I wanted such a thing, I belong to another man. I don’t just belong in the symbolic sense of having a relationship. He owns me. I am his possession.”

She watched to see if he so much as blinked. He didn’t. But then perhaps he too had followed the path they’d struck out on together all those years ago. He was after all in a private club for just such practices.

“You said ‘even if I wanted.’ Do you want it, Ren?”

She frowned. Again, she hadn’t expected that approach.

“No,” she replied honestly. “We’re two very different people now, Cole. We can’t just pick up because we once shared something special. You can’t just walk back into my life after ten years and expect me to open my arms.”

Cole’s eyes glittered and his jaw tightened at her response. “Tell me this: If there was no Lucas, if you didn’t belong to another man, would you be holding me at arms’ length right now or would you be willing to see if there was still a spark between us?”

She’d already been honest. There was no point in fudging the truth now. She closed her eyes, breathed out and then reopened them again, hoping she sounded steady and calm. “Maybe? I can’t really answer that. My loyalty lies elsewhere. The point is there is a Lucas. I’m not free. This conversation is pointless.”

“What about your heart?” he asked in a quiet voice. “Where does that lie, Ren?”

She held up her hands. “Enough, Cole. Nothing good can come of this. It was nice to see you. The years have been good to you. I would never be disloyal to Lucas. He owns me. I’m happy to be his. I’m his by choice. My choice. There is no other place I want to be more.”

“I’m glad to hear that what belongs to me can’t be swayed by the pretty words of others,” Lucas drawled.

Ren jumped, took a step back and stared over Cole’s shoulder to see Lucas leaning against the opposite wall. How long had he been there? And why did she feel so damn guilty?

She rubbed her hands down her jeans, dismayed at how this evening had turned out. She simply hadn’t been prepared to see Cole again after so long and definitely not to be bombarded by memories of them together and his bluntness about wanting …What did he want? It all sounded so crazy. They see each other again, in some sex club, and he wants her back just like that?

She pushed forward and frowned as she automatically went to Lucas’s side. He slid an arm around her but it was a gesture of support, not a movement meant to signal his possession to another man. She appreciated that. At the moment she didn’t feel like being in the middle of some pissing match. She needed comfort and Lucas had sensed it.

As she stared back at Cole, he looked …tortured. Again, why? None of this made sense. Unless…?

“You knew I’d be here tonight, didn’t you? Did you plan this? How did you know? You weren’t surprised to see me. This didn’t come out of the blue at all.”

Lucas’s hand tightened on her upper arm and he pulled her in closer, as if to tell her not to worry. But he too waited for Cole’s response, his dark eyes staring intently at the man who’d boldly encroached on his territory.

Maybe he was curious. Ren wasn’t entirely certain why Lucas was allowing this to go further. At times he was absolutely unreadable. This was one of those times. She didn’t sense that he was angry. She didn’t want him angry.

Cole’s lips drew into a firm line. His jaw grew tight, which only accentuated the strong lines of his face. Gone were the traces of youth. He was a formidable man. One that she’d absolutely be drawn to. That promise of dominance. The quiet strength in those intense eyes.

She’d had a taste. Just a taste. Mixed with youthful innocence. It had been bittersweet. She’d loved him so much, but they’d been too young to know what they were getting into.

“I asked Damon to invite you,” he said by way of admission. “I saw you the other night when I was eating with Damon and Serena. I knew I had to see you again. I couldn’t walk away…”

Like he had before.

The words lay unspoken and heavy between them. The air was electric, the silence unnerving. She swallowed but couldn’t rid herself of the sudden knot that was closing her throat.

“And yet you knew she belonged to me,” Lucas said mildly.

“She was mine first.”

Lucas nodded. “That may be so, but you’re her past. I’m her future.”

Ren glanced up in surprise but Lucas admonished her with a quick squeeze of her arm. It was the first time he issued any sort of order since they’d arrived. He wanted her silence.

She lowered her gaze and his grip slowly loosened.

Cole’s eyes glittered in challenge. “So you say. But I’ve not heard Ren say the same.”

Lucas studied him a moment, his expression odd. “Interesting that you’d make such a distinction. As the one who owns her, body and soul, the two are the same. What I say is what she says. Clearly you are a man of similar tastes and yet you’d expect her to refute my word. Would you tolerate the same if she were yours?”

“I would want her to be happy,” Cole said from behind tightly clenched teeth. “Even if it wasn’t with me.”

“In that we are agreed,” Lucas said. “Ren’s happiness is of utmost importance to me.”

“Then allow her to make the choice.”

Lucas smiled. “She already has.”

Cole stared at Lucas, the man who owned Ren. It wasn’t an alien concept. It could be argued that Damon owned Serena, although she owned his heart, body and soul as well. He was hers every bit as much as she was his.

He’d never given the idea of ownership much thought. It was something that over the years he’d contemplated. He’d seen. He’d experienced. Though he’d never owned a woman. He’d never been close enough to one to feel proprietary over. He’d only ever wanted to possess one woman.

Now, faced with a man who was very clear in his ownership, and backed by Ren herself, who seemed very comfortable with the label and the sentiment, he was …appalled? Dismayed? Frustrated?

He was a flaming hypocrite because from the moment he’d laid eyes on Ren again, he’d been seized by a force so strong that it staggered him. A voice inside his head that told him to claim her. That she belonged to him. That he wanted to own her.

He wanted to be able to show her that he wasn’t the same boy playing at dominance. He would never make such a brutal mistake now. He would never hurt her as he’d done when he was young and inexperienced and had no business testing the waters with a girl he adored.

He’d been arrogant and self-assured. He didn’t need to be taught and certainly not by another man. Ren was his and he needed no instruction when it came to her, did he? He knew her body intimately. Had spent hours exploring it, tasting it, possessing it.

He’d been so stupid. So very wrong.

He couldn’t accept that Ren was beyond his reach. But he also knew that there were different rules for the world he lived in. The world Ren lived in.

He nodded slowly, but his gaze locked with Lucas’s in a clear message. This wasn’t over. Not by a long shot. Lucas dipped his head in acknowledgment.

“I think perhaps it’s best if we go now,” Lucas said in that quiet, controlled voice. “I don’t want to cause Ren any further upset. Give my regrets to Damon and Serena.”

He turned to Ren as if giving her permission to speak. She was a disciplined submissive. So beautiful. Elegant in her obedience and her respect for the man who mastered her. It made Cole ache.

She touched Lucas’s arm as if to thank him and then she turned to Cole.

“It was nice to see you again, Cole.”

It took all of Cole’s restraint not to reach out and touch her. Not to take her hand and feel the softness of her palm. Turn it over in his hand and kiss it. He wanted to rub her hand over his cheek and down his neck. He just wanted to touch her. To feel her against him.

And now she was turning to go. Panic flared in his chest. Spread to his throat, squeezing relentlessly until his pulse thudded rapidly, each beat like a hammer at his temples.

Lucas nudged Ren away and as she started down the hall, Lucas held out a business card to Cole.

With a frown, Cole took the card. He was still holding it, staring down at the name and contact information for Lucas Holt when Lucas turned and disappeared down the hall after Ren.

CHAPTER 6

Ren wasn’t herself. Lucas knew her intimately. Better than he’d ever known another woman, which he found interesting given the length of their association.

He’d had longer relationships. Their year together was actually one of his shorter agreements. But they meshed well.

And yet, as well as he knew her, he also recognized that there was still so much of her to learn. Maybe that was why she still fascinated him so much.

He watched her frown over her sketch, chew absently at her pencil and then with disgust, ball up the paper and toss it across the room.

Yes, his Ren was distracted, and he knew well the source of her preoccupation.

If he asked, he knew she’d be truthful. It was what he liked most about her. She was refreshingly honest even when she thought he’d be unhappy with her response. He never grew angry over the truth, though. It was a clear invitation for lies, and he hated untruths above all else.

But he wouldn’t force her to voice the source of her distraction. He sensed how unsettled she was and he worried about her happiness.

With a sigh, he turned away, knowing what he needed to do, but at the same time, reluctant. His reluctance intrigued him as much as the idea that he didn’t yet know all there was to know of his Ren.

It would seem that he did indeed possess the ability to feel jealousy. This was new for him, and while he recognized it for what it was, he was mystified by it.

Perhaps he’d allowed Ren to get closer than he’d intended. But then he hadn’t done it consciously. Somehow she’d managed to slip past his defenses and he doubted she’d tried to do so. She seemed as content with the status of their relationship as he was. Or had been. Now he wasn’t so sure what he wanted or expected. And that bothered him.

The question was, what did he want?

He walked quietly away from the doorway of Ren’s office, went into his own, closed the door and then sank into the chair behind his desk.

He fingered the message left by his secretary, who came in half a day to take care of paperwork. Cole had called as Lucas had known he would.

He laid his hand over the phone receiver, staring at that message for a long moment. Then he picked it up and keyed in Cole’s number.

CHAPTER 7

Lucas entered Ren’s office to find her asleep at her desk. Her cheek rested against the polished mahogany and her silky hair splayed out over the piles of paper that littered the surface.

He’d left her to contemplate for the last two days. She’d immersed herself in her work and she seemed deep in thought even when she was away from it and in his presence.

Normally he wouldn’t tolerate such inattention. But he found himself unable to punish her for the confusion she was feeling. It was also becoming increasingly clear that he had a soft spot for this particular woman.

He reached down, slid his hands underneath her slight body and lifted her into his arms. She came to rest against his chest with a small sigh and she immediately snuggled into his hold.

He smiled and kissed her brow as he strode out of her office toward the bedroom they shared. Once there, he placed her on the bed and then began undressing her.

She roused and stared at him with sleepy eyes as he slid her jeans over her hips.

“I did it again,” she mumbled.

He nodded. “You did. You worked too hard and too long without a break. When did you eat last?”

She frowned and her lips pursed in concentration. “This morning, I think.”

He scowled and she smiled. She reached up to feather her fingers over his brow, brushing aside his hair.

He removed her jeans and stared down at her nearly naked body. She was down to only her panties. They wouldn’t last long. She had a drawer full of expensive lacy confections because he did love to tear them.

He ran his hands up her legs until his thumbs brushed over the thin material covering her pussy. He dipped one finger underneath the band, ran it downward and then he ripped, rending the material in two, the ends fluttering outward to bare her to his gaze.

The diamond teardrop glittered from her navel. Above the hood shielding her clitoris was a triangle of dark hair, trimmed short and neat. Her pussy lips were bare. Silky soft to the touch. Waxed smooth every week.

He warred with himself over how he wanted tonight to go down. There was a part of him eager to reassert his dominance. To take her to the very edge of her boundaries until they were both satisfied that he owned every inch of her body.

The other part of him wanted to be gentle with her. Shower her with tenderness. And ask her to bare her secrets.

The last gave him pause. Ask. Not demand. Somehow it seemed important that she willingly give him what he wanted to know. He could demand, yes. And she’d willingly oblige him. She was perfect in that regard. He’d never met a woman quite so comfortable in her skin. So open. So …at peace.

But now he wondered about that peace and what it had cost her. Her meeting with Cole had rattled her. He’d seen it. Known it. Hadn’t exactly known how to digest what he’d witnessed.

One thing he knew. He wanted to know more about the much younger Ren. The Ren who’d once belonged to Cole Madison, a man who clearly hadn’t forgotten her in the many years since they went their separate ways.

“What are you thinking?”

She lay beneath him, quiet, soft. Her gaze on him. Her attention focused solely on him. He leaned down and pressed a single kiss to the soft lips of her pussy and enjoyed the quick shiver that rocked through her body.

So responsive. So in tune with his wants and needs. He wondered if he’d ever find a woman more perfect for him. And yet, he’d never given much thought to the permanence of their relationship. Her role in his life.

Now he was going to be made to do just that, and he wasn’t sure he liked the circumstances that were going to force his hand.

He shifted his body up until he lay on his side next to her, his head propped in his palm as he stared down into her eyes. She was still staring oddly at him, obviously perplexed by his mood.

He touched his finger to the soft skin of her cheek and traced a line down to her jaw. “Tell me about Cole Madison.”

He didn’t miss the sudden flare in her eyes or the slight tension coiling through her body. She was tempted to look away but her discipline didn’t desert her. She kept her gaze steady and fixed on him.

Then she sighed. “We were childhood sweethearts. I say childhood. I was young. Just sixteen when we first met. He was twenty. In college. I adored him. He was everything a sixteen-year-old girl dreams of. Athletic. Gorgeous. Sweet. Protective and very alpha. Even then I knew I wanted and needed a very strong man. I didn’t have an explanation or even a name for it at the time, but I was instantly attracted to him.”

Lucas continued to stroke her cheek, more to offer her comfort and to let her know he wasn’t threatened by the retelling of her first love.

“Were you intimate at such a young age?” he asked. “That could have gotten him into serious legal trouble in most, if not all, states.”

Ren shook her head. “He never pressured me for sex. In fact, he was adamant that we wait. It would probably make him sound weak or Beta to most people, but he was confident, self-assured. All he cared about was me and he thought I was too young for a sexual relationship.”

Lucas nodded in grudging respect. Not many young men would have cared whether their pretty girlfriend was too immature for sex.

“I thought perhaps we would consummate our relationship when I turned eighteen. I was positively breathless as my birthday neared. We’d been together for two years. He was about to graduate college. I loved him. I was sure he was the one I wanted to be with sexually and emotionally.

“But he surprised me by taking me to get the tattoo on my back. My parents were very strict and perhaps this was another reason Cole held off and didn’t pressure me. He didn’t want to cause problems for me with my mom and dad. They were very conservative. They forbade me from even getting my ears pierced until I turned eighteen.”

He tweaked one earlobe. “You never did get them pierced.”

She shook her head. “I got the tattoo instead. It was exactly what I wanted. I designed it myself. Cole insisted that I not go to some fly-by-night, back-alley tattoo parlor, so he took me into the city to a very expensive artist who did the ink. It was the best birthday gift I ever received. In a lot of ways it wasn’t just a tattoo. It was a mark of my independence. A new milestone in my life.”

So far Lucas wasn’t seeing the problem in her relationship with Cole. He seemed like a pretty decent guy, which annoyed him, truth be told. He wanted—needed—a reason to back out of the decision he’d already made.

“Only after the tattoo was completely healed did we make love for the first time. It was so perfect. He was my first and he made it so very special for me.”

She went silent a moment and though she still looked up at him, she was no longer seeing him. She was somewhere else. Lost in her memories. Sadness entered her eyes and he suddenly wanted nothing more than to hold her and shield her from hurt.

“After that first time, we became inseparable. Cole took over. Not in a negative way. I welcomed it. I loved that he took care of me. He anticipated my needs. He provided for me. It was like a fairy tale. It was precisely what I wanted in a relationship.

“We began to talk about it. We didn’t just slip into it. We knew what we were was …different. And exciting. We were young and we weren’t even sure exactly how to define this type of relationship. We began to experiment. Sexually. We quickly discovered what we did and didn’t enjoy. We embraced what turned us on and satisfied us emotionally and quickly discarded what didn’t meet a need.”

Again she broke off and went silent.

“What happened?” Lucas asked.

“One night things went too far. It was an accident. He was using a whip and he didn’t have much experience.”

Lucas winced. A whip wasn’t for an inexperienced hand. Not at all. It took long hours of practice to be able to wield it without injuring your partner. He didn’t use whips. He didn’t like them. He liked leather. Crops. Belts. Or the flat of his own hand. He also liked wood. Smooth, treated wood so there was no chance of Ren being injured by splinters or rough surfaces.

Then he frowned as a thought occurred to him. He turned her so the scar on her shoulder was visible. It was about four inches long, curving over her shoulder blade.

He traced the scar with his fingertip and then leaned down to kiss it. “Did he do this?”

She swallowed visibly and nodded.

Lucas gripped her shoulder, kissed her again and softly nuzzled the barely raised area of flesh. Had she been badly frightened? Had it broken her trust?

“It must have scared you.”

Ren rose up on her elbow so they were eye level. “That’s just the thing, Lucas. It didn’t frighten me. It hurt, yes. No doubt about that. Cole was devastated. I mean, truly devastated. He was so horrified that he’d hurt me. But I loved him. I trusted him. I knew he hadn’t meant to. I knew he’d cut off his right arm before ever willingly hurting me. I knew all of this. But he was the one who couldn’t get past it.”

Lucas’s forehead wrinkled in confusion.

“He was the one who walked away,” Ren said softly, pain evident in her voice. “I begged him. God, I begged him. He hated himself. I think it made it worse for me to tell him it didn’t matter, that I loved him and knew he hadn’t meant to. He made this comment about how often women forgave their abusers over and over and how they were willing to say it was an accident when they were hurt. In his mind, he crossed an unforgivable line and nothing I said could change his mind.

“He began to question every aspect of our relationship. How he had complete control and dominance. How I complied with his wishes. He worried I’d lost my individuality, that somehow he’d swallowed me up. He was horrified that he’d become this monster who held me on such a tight leash that I had no life outside of him.”

“Did he?”

Her denial was immediate and he believed her. She was honest in all things. About herself. Her mistakes. Her shortcomings. If she truly believed that she’d been abused, she would tell him so now.

“He made a mistake,” Ren said painfully. “One mistake. We were young. We were inexperienced. We were testing the waters of a relationship we knew defied societal norms. We decided together what did and didn’t work for us. He and I were both drawn to the idea of pain as pleasure and how much pain was too much before it overrode all else and simply became …pain. He was always so careful and he simply made a mistake.”

“Was that the only mark?” Lucas asked. Cole’s reaction seemed extreme, but then he’d been a much younger man and it appeared as though he’d had a deep sense of responsibility toward Ren even at that young age. It was hard to know if Lucas would have felt the same if he’d made such a mistake in his youth with a woman he hadn’t cared for as deeply as Cole had cared for Ren.

Ren frowned and her eyes glittered with unshed tears. “No. But it was the only mark that left a scar. My back was striped. The skin was broken in three places but the place on my shoulder was the worst. The whip sliced open the skin and I bled a lot. Cole took me in to be stitched.”

Lucas pulled her in closer, offering his warmth and the strength of his body. He knew it was something that comforted her, and her sadness was unsettling to him. He didn’t like the look in her eyes or the sound of her voice.

He felt …helpless and it was an odd sensation. Not at all one he was accustomed to.

She was getting to him. Worming her way deeper and he found it perplexing. Why her? What was it about her?

“So he left?” Lucas finally asked.

Ren sighed against him and again, her unhappiness struck a chord deep inside his chest. “Not at first. He took care of me. Dressed the wound every single day. Went with me to have the stitches removed. But he didn’t touch me sexually. Not even once. He drifted further and further away. It was like he felt he wasn’t worthy of me anymore. It was so frustrating. I tried to talk to him but I just couldn’t get through. The harder I tried, the more convinced he was that he wielded too much power over me and that he wasn’t responsible enough to shoulder it and wield it properly. He blamed himself for ‘pushing’ me into the lifestyle. He seemed to forget that it had held as much interest to me as it had to him from the very beginning. It was a need I had, one I recognized, even before we ever embarked on the sexual side of our relationship. But he didn’t see it that way. He thought he’d forced me into something I didn’t want. That I’d done it all just to please him. And I know I’m making him sound like a martyr and that now, years later, it may sound ridiculous, but you have to understand, this affected him profoundly.”

“Yes, I see it did,” Lucas murmured.

“He truly felt like the best thing he could do for me was to walk away when in fact it was the one thing that hurt me far worse than any whip to my back. Cole changed me. He awakened something within me that has never died. He is a large part of who I am today.”

“I think you don’t give yourself enough credit,” Lucas said.

She shook her head. “I know what you’re saying. I do. But the thing is, he was my introduction to dominance and submission. Would I have gotten there eventually without him? Oh yes, definitely I would have. It was a need inside me before he awakened it. But through him, I tasted what it was like to have a man utterly cherish me. Protect me. Love me with everything he had. Would my experience have been the same with another man? Absolutely not. What if I had chosen the wrong man? What if I had experimented with someone who didn’t care for me as much as Cole did? Or someone who wasn’t as patient as he was. Or even someone who wasn’t willing to listen to what I liked and didn’t like, and what I needed and didn’t need? Because of him, I knew exactly what I wanted and needed from a relationship and I refused to settle for less. I’m honest in my needs and wants because of him. Because he showed me that there are men who will give me exactly what I want sexually and emotionally.”

Her impassioned speech shook him. Her eyes had darkened and she leaned forward, her voice cracking with emotion. This wasn’t a woman who’d moved on and forgotten the man she’d once given her very soul to.

A sensation that felt very much like dread settled heavily into his chest. The weight was uncomfortable, like a rock pushing down on him.

Cole had said he’d want Ren to be happy. Could Lucas say the same? He’d told Cole as much. But were they just words? A week ago he would have said without question that her happiness was everything to him. He spared no expense to ensure she had everything she could possibly need or want. He anticipated her moods, protected her, cared for her and yes, he cherished her.

But could he really take that step to ensure her happiness? To give her a choice?

His mouth was dry and he loathed the indecision that racked him. He’d already taken the first step. Ren was his. She wouldn’t question what he chose to do with her body. But he couldn’t control her heart and that realization unsettled his carefully ordered existence.

What he planned to do could very well mean losing her, and he wasn’t at all sure he could ever live with that.

CHAPTER 8

Lucas chose the meeting to happen at Cole’s offices. Cole wouldn’t have expected Lucas to come to him. The more expected move would have been for Lucas to have made a power play, invited Cole into his sanctum so that the confrontation occurred on Lucas’s turf.

Lucas wasn’t one to be threatened by the power of others. He could easily meet Cole on his own terms and where Cole felt most comfortable. The outcome wouldn’t change regardless of where the meeting was held.

He parked on the street outside the tall downtown Houston office building and strode inside. He checked in with security, got a visitor’s pass and then took the elevator to the thirtieth floor.

He’d done his homework on Cole Madison. He was a successful real estate developer but he had his hands in many other pots. He had a Midas touch when it came to business and what he touched turned to gold, making him a sought out investor for up-and-coming enterprises. In recent years, he’d focused quite a bit on the timber industry in Southeast Texas and had partnered with Damon Roche in quite a few projects.

When he stepped off the elevator, Lucas was greeted by Cole himself. Apparently Cole wasn’t into power games any more than Lucas was. Cole didn’t make Lucas wait and showed him directly into his office.

Lucas declined Cole’s offer of a drink but took the seat in the sitting area away from the desk when Cole issued the invitation.

Lucas leaned back and simply waited, his gaze tracking Cole as he took the seat across from Lucas.

“I want her,” Cole said bluntly.

Appreciative that there would be no skirting the issue, Lucas nodded. “I know you do.”

“What exactly is the nature of your agreement with her?”

Lucas lifted an eyebrow. “You don’t expect me to tell you that, do you?”

“Is she your lover or is she simply your submissive?” Cole asked, his eyes narrowing.

Lucas understood the differentiation but he didn’t appreciate Cole delving into what Lucas considered very private territory. Even though he well understood why Cole did so.

“She’s both,” he said simply.

“You care for her.”

“I care for all the women in my keeping.”

The vague response irritated Cole. Lucas wasn’t sure why he led Cole to believe that Ren meant nothing more to him than any other woman he had. Maybe it was said more to himself than to the other man. But either way it was an untruth, and Lucas despised liars.

“Tell me, Madison, what makes you think Ren would want you back? Have you ever considered that she’s happy where she is in her life right now?”

Pain darkened Cole’s eyes and he looked away briefly. When his gaze returned to Lucas, it was cold and unyielding, giving nothing away.

“I can make her happy.”

It was on the tip of Lucas’s tongue to argue the point. To tell Cole that it didn’t matter what he thought because Ren was Lucas’s. But that wasn’t why he’d come. It wasn’t at all what he was going to say. There was little point in needling the other man.

“I’m agreeable to giving her to you for two weeks’ time,” Lucas said.

Cole went completely still, and his eyes suddenly blazed. It was clear that he was shocked by Lucas’s offer. Lucas experienced a moment’s satisfaction that he’d been able to catch this man off guard because he sensed it didn’t happen often.

Cole finally found his tongue and his response was explosive. “What?”

Lucas remained silent, allowing Cole to process the sudden declaration.

Cole’s eyes narrowed and he leaned forward. “What’s your angle, Holt?”

“No angle,” Lucas returned calmly. “Ren has been out of sorts since her meeting with you. It’s clear that you and she have unresolved feelings. I’d prefer for those feelings to be resolved so the past can be put to rest.”

“And if they aren’t?” Cole challenged.

“One way or another, they will be.”

Cole stood, then ran a hand through his hair and turned his back to Lucas to stare out the window. When he turned back around, Lucas could see how unsettled he was. Whatever the past, he obviously did still care deeply for Ren.

“I have conditions,” Lucas said before Cole could say anything further.

“Of course,” Cole said dryly.

“For the first meeting, I will be present. I won’t simply turn over a woman I care a great deal about to a man I’m not sure of. You’ll demonstrate your handling of her and I’ll be satisfied that she’ll be well cared for or we leave together.”

“You want to watch me fuck her?” Cole asked in disbelief.

Lucas shrugged. “If that’s what occurs, then yes, I’ll watch you fuck her. You won’t disrespect her. You will treat her with the utmost care. If I sense anything, and I mean, anything at all that would lead me to believe I’m making a mistake, I’ll pull the plug and Ren leaves with me.”

Cole shook his head. “What’s your game? Why would you do this? It doesn’t make any sense. You have to know that I’m going to do everything in my power to make damn sure she stays with me.”

“Yes, I know.”

Cole’s look of absolute what the fuck amused Lucas.

“If you’re able to take her from me then she never really belonged to me now did she?”

“You’re crazy,” Cole muttered.

“I want her to be happy even if it’s not with me. I wonder if you can say the same.”

“I don’t know,” Cole said honestly.

Lucas rose. “I realize I run the risk of having Ren not return to me. She could choose you. I would be lying if I said I had any confidence of knowing how she’ll choose either way. But know this: If she does indeed return to me when her time with you is over, I’ll never let her go again.”

“Yeah, I understand. In your position, I wouldn’t either.”

“I’m giving you something very precious to me,” Lucas said quietly. “If you do anything to hurt her, I’ll come after you.”

Cole nodded his understanding. “Just so you understand, though, I don’t take orders from you. If you’re truly giving Ren to me, that period of time will be on my terms.”

“I think Ren would be very disappointed if the man charged with taking care for her ever allowed another man to dictate his actions. Ren needs a very strong man. Don’t think to wrap her in cotton and pretend you aren’t a dominant man. She won’t thank you for it and it will immediately drive her away. Ren is a woman who is very comfortable with her needs and wants. She doesn’t like games and she won’t appreciate you pretending to be what you’re not in an effort to woo her.”

Cole’s breath huffed out in a sound that came between confusion and exasperation. “You’re a twisted son of a bitch, you know that? You’re giving me a primer to seducing the woman you care about away from you. You’re bitingly possessive one minute and lazily accepting the next.”

A slow smile twitched the corners of Lucas’s mouth. “But you need no such primer. You were Ren’s first. You should know how to please her. And if you don’t, she’ll simply come back to me that much faster.”

Cole settled onto the couch and after a moment, Lucas took his seat across from Cole. For the space of a few seconds, Lucas studied the man who’d meant so much to Ren.

“Tread carefully, Madison. It puzzles you that I’d provide you so much information. I want Ren to be happy, but more than that I want her to feel safe and comforted. Her last relationship damaged her.”

Cole’s nostrils immediately flared and he sat forward, his expression blank. “What do you mean by ‘damaged’?”

“Her lover didn’t give her what she needed. Worse, he made her second guess what she knew to be true. What she needed and wanted. He made her feel inferior. A slut and a whore who was too bold, too spirited and too confident. He tried to destroy that in her. He wanted a hapless doll to vent his authority. He didn’t want a strong, vibrant woman and so he tried to make Ren something she wasn’t.”

“Son of a bitch,” Cole bit out.

“Tell me, Madison, did you ever try to make Ren feel that way?”

“Hell no! What the fuck are you implying?”

Lucas smiled again. “Funny, that’s what she herself told me. That you were never anything but cherishing, possessive and caring.”

Cole’s eyes narrowed. “What exactly are you getting to here?”

“You’ve already admitted your mistake. I’m merely driving the point home. But at the same time I can only be grateful that you walked away from her because I wouldn’t have her now.”

“If I have my way, you’ll have her no longer,” Cole said in a tight voice.

Lucas ignored the challenge. He wanted to make sure all of his con ditions were outlined so Cole would have all the facts when he made his decision.

“There is another condition, one I take very seriously.”

Cole gave a short nod to indicate Lucas should continue.

“There will be no other women during the time Ren is with you. I realize in some circles, it’s accepted for a submissive to accept whatever her master chooses to do. Some men will take multiple women. I can’t speak as to their motive or desires. I won’t tolerate such disrespect of Ren.”

Cole’s brows drew together. “I have no interest in other women but I’m curious as to why you feel so strongly about it.”

“I would not ever have her feel as though I needed more than she could give me. Again, in her last relationship, it was something the dickhead she was with did and it undermined her confidence. It took a while for her to recover her spark, and I’d never have it extinguished. Besides, if you need more than Ren can provide, she doesn’t belong with you anyway.”

“We agree on that much,” Cole conceded. “I would never hurt her that way.”

“I’m glad to know my intuition wasn’t wrong about you.”

Cole’s brow wrinkled again but Lucas ignored it and got to his last condition.

“Ren must have a private place of her own in which to work. Her career is very important to her. It’s part of her identity. She needs an area free of distractions where she can write and draw. I expect you to provide it and not encroach on those times when she chooses to work.”

“What does she do?” Cole asked.

“She writes and illustrates children’s books.”

Cole’s eyebrows went up. He looked surprised but he didn’t give voice to it.

“I will of course provide Ren a place to work that is free of distractions.”

Lucas nodded and then stood. The meeting was done. Cole would need time to consider Lucas’s proposal. There was little point in rehashing the same points over again.

He turned to go but then at the doorway, he hesitated and twisted to look at Cole once more. “Don’t take my generosity for what it isn’t. I do this for Ren and only Ren. Don’t mistake the gift as evidence that I’m giving her up. I won’t ever give her up without a fight.”

“Understood.”

“Think about what I’ve offered. You have my number. Call me when you’ve made your decision and I’ll make arrangements to bring Ren to you. I want it to be at your home. It’s important for her to know that I’d never allow this to happen in her sanctuary. With me, and at her home with me, she is safe from all things, all hurts, everything that makes her uncomfortable. I would preserve that at all costs.”

Cole nodded. “I’ll be in touch.”

And, Lucas realized as he rode the elevator back down, Cole would be in touch. He had the look of a very determined man. The time that Ren would spend with Cole would be the longest weeks of Lucas’s life.

When he’d first made the decision to offer Cole the proposition, he hadn’t imagined that he’d feel so …gutted. There simply wasn’t another word to describe the ugly sensation snaking its way through his chest.

He could lose Ren. And it was the very last thing he wanted.

CHAPTER 9

Ren knew when Lucas told her to dress for a night at the club that she’d been working too hard. It was a signal she’d grown to recognize. Whenever Lucas thought she was pushing herself too hard, he’d take her to the club for an evening to blow off some steam, relax and enjoy one of her favorite activities.

She loved to dance. Loved to dress sexy and get down and dirty on the dance floor. And Lucas loved to watch her, so it was a win-win situation for her.

Tonight, perhaps more than ever, she needed that extra boost, so she dressed a little more daring than usual. Lucas hadn’t told her not to wear underwear so she chose an extra short skirt that hugged the curves of her ass and looked glued to her body.

Her top was skimpy but not trashy looking, thanks to Lucas’s impeccable taste and his bottomless wallet when it came to giving her the best of everything.

Her midriff was completely bared, as was her back. The top was secured by a tie around her neck and it hung loose over her breasts. Any movement at all would give those close to her a prime view of her nipples.

But since Lucas rarely left her side or let her venture too far when they went to one of his clubs, she didn’t really have to worry about what others saw. She only cared what he’d be able to see and appreciate.

She was pondering her choices in shoes when Lucas walked into the bedroom, his hands shoved into his worn jeans, and as usual in bare feet. For a moment she let her gaze wander appreciatively over his well-toned body. But what drew her the most was the comfort she enjoyed from his warmth and the way he felt against her.

His eyebrows went up as he too sent his gaze seeking over her body. “Very sexy. Is this a test to see if I can make it out of the house without fucking you?”

She grinned, relaxing as some of the tension bled out of her. She’d been tense ever since her meeting with Cole, and she couldn’t really explain why. She’d been invaded by this anxious sense of dread, like when she worried about something but didn’t really know about what. It was as though an ominous, heavy cloud had settled over her.

Foregoing her usual reserve with Lucas, she went to him and put her arms around him, hugging him tightly against her. For a moment he seemed surprised and then he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her back.

He tucked her head underneath his chin and rubbed his hand up and down her bare back. “What were you contemplating so seriously when I came in?”

She smiled against his chest. “Nothing so earth shattering. I couldn’t decide which shoes best suited this outfit.”

His hand strayed over her ass and just barely below the curve of her buttocks to where the hem of her skirt rested. “What outfit?”

She laughed this time and pulled away, smiling up at him. He smiled back, clear affection in his eyes. She loved him this way. Calm and easygoing. Just as she loved him at his most intense.

“Do you wish me to change?”

His gaze drifted down her body, and she felt a surge of pleasure at the clear appreciation written on his face. “No. I like what you’re wearing. The important question is whether you like it and if you feel as confident and sexy as you look.”

It was hard not to feel that way when he looked at her like he was.

“Well, if I’m going sexy and daring, I’m going to go whole hog,” she said as she pushed back into the large closet that housed all of the clothes and shoes Lucas had bought for her.

She came out a few seconds later with a pair of fire-engine red stilettos.

“I want a preview before we go out,” Lucas growled.

“In that case, why don’t you go get dressed. I’ll be waiting when you get out,” she said, lowering her voice to a wicked murmur.

He sent her a decidedly predatory look and then turned to go into his own closet.

Smiling, she sat on the edge of the bed and pulled on the sleek, expensive shoes. They gave her a nice height boost and with them on, she reached Lucas’s nose.

She waited a moment until she heard Lucas returning and then she stood, angling her feet so she presented a sexy pose, her legs displayed to their best advantage.

He came to a full stop when he saw her. She shivered at the sudden fire in his eyes. Loved how he reacted, loved that she could incite such a reaction from this tightly controlled man.

“Do you have underwear on?”

She lowered her lashes provocatively and murmured a shy, “Yes.”

She watched him from underneath her lashes, knowing he loved it when she played coy. As much as he revered the strong, confident woman she was, he was turned on when she decided to play the shy virgin.

“Show me.”

Deciding that simply peeling up the tight-fitting skirt would be way too mundane, she eased backward, sliding onto the edge of the bed. She rested back on her palms and allowed her thighs to part so that he could see the hint of lacy lingerie.

In a flash, he was across the room standing between her knees. He shoved at the stretch material of her skirt until he rolled it past her hips, baring the daring black see-through lace of her panties.

She tried to control her smile as he quickly realized just what pair of panties she had on.

He made a sound that was a mixture of approval and crazed desire. Then he went for the fly of his slacks. He freed his cock and in a moment’s time he was pressing through the slit of her panties and deep inside her pussy.

His fingers dug into her hips and his eyes bore ruthlessly into hers. He yanked her toward him and then hoisted her legs to curl around his waist.

“Careful,” she murmured. “Wouldn’t want to get messy on our way out to the club.”

He thrust hard and deep, forcing a gasp from her. Then he leaned down and kissed her, the gentleness a direct contradiction to the force in which he possessed her.

“I’m going to come so deep inside you that there won’t be a mess.” His deep voice slid over her, dark and sensuous, like his touch. “Be a good girl and don’t spill a drop. If you do, I’ll have to punish you. Besides, I like the idea of you going to my club with my cum inside you.”

“You’re such a caveman,” she teased.

He answered her with another punishing thrust. Then he wrapped his hand in her hair, pulling and angling her head so that he could graze his teeth along her jaw. “Damn right, I am.”

She let out a soft, helpless whimper that she knew would excite him all the more. As expected, he became more punishing and soon the room was filled with the harsh sounds of raw fucking.

Her entire body shook as he pounded into her. He shoved aside the thin barrier of her top so that her jiggling breasts were visible.

He thumbed one dark nipple and stilled his thrusts for a moment. “I’d love to pierce your nipples. Perhaps that will be your next gift from me.”

A delicious thrill rolled through her body. Lucas was generous in all things, but she loved especially when he bestowed gifts that he enjoyed. The idea of pleasing him with the erotic jewelry excited her.

He began to thrust again, but they were tight, controlled thrusts. Three more and he suddenly went stiff and she could feel the hot, slick sensation of his cum coating her passageway.

He stood there, still wedged tightly inside her as he stared down into her eyes.

“Wear the bright red lipstick. I want to look at you all night and fantasize about those red lips sucking my cock on the way home.”

Her body hummed and she was desperate for release, but he hadn’t given her permission and she knew it was likely he wouldn’t.

As if reading her mind, he pulled out, his cock still very much erect and glistening with a mixture of her fluids and his.

“Get down on your knees and lick me clean. Don’t get anything on my pants. I want you hungry and on edge all night. Think of me, Ren. Imagine what I’ll do to you when we get home. Or maybe I won’t wait. Maybe I’ll take you right there in my club where anyone could happen on us. Would you like that?”

She went to her knees, hands locked behind her back. He held her chin and guided his cock toward her mouth. He slid inside and rocked gently back and forth until there was no trace of her fluids or his.

Still, he continued, his grip on her letting her know that he was in control. He fucked her mouth for several long minutes before finally he stepped away and tucked himself back into the confines of his pants.

He reached down to take her hand and carefully assisted her to her feet so she wouldn’t trip in her heels. He arranged her skirt so that it once again covered her ass and then he fixed her top to lay over her breasts.

He pressed a quick kiss to her swollen lips. “Go finish getting ready. I’ll wait downstairs for you.”

CHAPTER 10

Lucas drove them to the club in his silver Mercedes Roadster. He whipped into the parking space reserved just outside the private back entrance to the downtown building.

Ren was already anticipating the rush when the thump of the club music invaded her veins.

He got out of the car and she waited for him to circle around to open her door. He was laid back about a lot of things but not when it came to her. He had exacting expectations and whether they were in public or private, he saw to her every need.

He reached in to take her hand and assisted her out, holding her against him for a moment until he was sure she had her footing. It amused her because he bought her a ridiculous number of high heels. He loved them on her. Loved to watch her in them. But he was terrified she was going to fall and break her neck.

They were met by one of Lucas’s bouncers as well as his club manager the moment they stepped toward the entrance.

Though Ren was clearly Lucas’s submissive, the other two men treated her with deference and absolute respect. One of the club employees had once made the mistake of treating Ren as though she was a lot lower on the food chain or as if he had the right to command her as Lucas commanded her.

After Lucas had—quite forcibly—shown him the error of his ways, Lucas had fired him on the spot. It quickly became clear to not only the employees but to the club regulars that Lucas highly valued his woman and would tolerate no disrespect shown to her.

As a result, Ren was kowtowed to every bit as much as Lucas himself was. Perhaps more so. Many had realized that the path to pleasing Lucas lay in pleasing her. Lucas went out of his way to reward those who saw to her every need.

“Good evening, Mr. Holt. Miss Michaels.”

Ren smiled up at the burly manager who had actually once been the head bouncer. “Hello, Duffy. How are things tonight?”

“Isn’t that my line?” Lucas inquired dryly.

“Busy. Just the way we like it,” Duffy returned. “Would you like your usual, sir?”

Lucas shook his head. “I’m going to take Ren around the club. See that my table is available and that a waitress is assigned to me.”

“Should I accompany you?” Craig asked.

Lucas turned to the bouncer. “No. You can wait at my table.”

Lucas wrapped a protective arm around her as they walked through the dark hallway, past the offices toward the doorway leading into the club. She could sense his displeasure but wasn’t sure what had happened in the short period of time since they’d arrived.

Her question was soon answered and it both amused her and touched her.

“Where is the lighting for the hallway?” Lucas bit out to his manager. “I asked that this be addressed two weeks ago. What if Ren falls? It’s too dark. She could trip on anything and never see it coming.”

“The contractor will be out tomorrow,” Duffy said hastily.

As they neared the doorway, the loud thump of bass and the roar of the crowd filtered through the thick, soundproof walls. Or at least as soundproof as they could get with the noise level through the roof.

Lucas reached for her hand and she twined her fingers through his, knowing he wanted her to stay close where he could protect her from anything.

She was happy to move closer into his warmth and strength as Duffy swung open the door and they walked into the cascade of flashing lights, raucous cheers and music blasting from all corners.

They entered close to the dance floor but Lucas led her to the stairs leading up the stadium-like platforms that housed tables on each row. At the top, situated directly in the middle with a prime view of the stage and dance floor, was Lucas’s private table, glassed in on three sides. The only access was from the front, leading up from the dance floor, and to go inside the enclosure, you had to run a gauntlet of three security guards.

Lucas guided her away from his table, though, and over to where a group of men gathered, drinks in hand. They were talking it up with girls that passed their way, flirting madly and having a good time.

Ren recognized a few of them as regulars, men who knew Lucas and who Lucas often invited to his table.

As they approached, three broke away to acknowledge Lucas, promptly turning their backs on the women they’d been courting. Ren found such an action intriguing. A testament to the power Lucas wielded. But he commanded attention wherever he went. He wore such power as comfortably as other people wore shoes.

Lucas released her hand only long enough to lean forward so he could say something to one of the men. Ren was sure she knew his name but then she’d been introduced to the three of them at the same time and it was hard for her to remember who was who.

Daryl. She was pretty sure the taller man was Daryl. The shorter blond guy was Matt and the African American guy to Daryl’s left was Jace.

She saw Daryl nod and gesture toward his friends. The next thing Ren knew, Lucas reached for her hand and pulled her forward. Jace then took her hand from Lucas, startling her. She glanced quickly at Lucas only to catch him nod to her that she was to accept this.

Lucas leaned in, cupped her cheek in a gentle gesture and bent his head so his mouth was close to her ear. “They’re going to dance with you. Go with them. I trust them.”

She wasn’t unused to Lucas having to leave her to make the rounds or to conduct business. What surprised her was him allowing other men to dance with her, or even more, charging them with essentially taking care of her. Lucas wasn’t one to trust others with what he valued. Not unless he was present and overseeing every aspect.

He kissed her cheek and then backed away, leaving her standing with the men. Jace flashed her a sexy smile and then gallantly gestured toward the stairs leading down to the dance floor.

She didn’t glance back at Lucas as Jace guided her down the stairs. To do so would send the message that she didn’t trust him. He wouldn’t appreciate it and she’d die before ever allowing anyone to think she didn’t have complete and utter faith in him.

Daryl came down on her other side and put a light hand to the small of her back while Matt walked behind them, effectively closing her off from anyone who might approach.

The music died for one split second while the DJ stirred the crowd into a frenzy. Jace leaned close to Ren where she could hear and said, “Lucas says you like to dance.”

“I love it,” she said with an exuberant smile.

Jace smiled back. “So do I. We’ll have some fun. Sound good?”

She nodded and relaxed. He seemed perfectly nice, and if he wasn’t, she didn’t harbor any illusions that at least four bouncers weren’t trained solely on her, and that as occupied as Lucas may be for the next little while, he wasn’t watching as well.

Jace pulled her onto the crowded dance floor but he, Daryl and Matt quickly formed a triangle around her so that no one got too close. The music started again and the bass thrilled through her veins, making each muscle jump in time to the beat.

Lights flashed, the electric, energetic music slipped under her skin and she let it flow through her body to every part until she loosened up and let go.

The men moved in closer, pinning her in the middle of them. The crowd around them gyrated in time to the music but Ren had her own little piece of the dance floor and she was free to move without fear of crashing into anyone else.

Here nothing could touch her. Not worry. Not fear. Not insecurity. Not her past. There was nothing but her and the sensual pulse of music and movement.

She quickly lost her inhibitions. Forgot she didn’t know these men. She sidled up to one, did a quick shimmy down his body. Quickly getting into the spirit, Jace held up his arms, tilted his body forward, and she met him in the middle, their bodies pressed together and moving in perfect synchronicity.

Warmth met her back and suddenly she was sandwiched between two hard bodies. They made no move to touch her or to put their hands on her, but their bodies cupped protectively to hers and she lost herself in the moment.

She put her hands up and turned to face Daryl. Jace slid up to her back, put his arms forward to block her in and they danced as a unit, smiling, writhing, laughing, her smile growing larger all the time.

Matt playfully pushed Daryl aside and crooked his finger wickedly at Ren. Not one to back down from a challenge, she sashayed forward, confident that her legs looked killer tonight. She was glad she chose the red shoes because they made her look and feel daring. Bold. Like a siren bent on seducing every male in her path.

She flipped her long hair back and let it slide over her shoulders then slowly worked her arms over her head, knowing that they’d get a glimpse of her breasts. They’d look. She knew that much. She also knew they wouldn’t touch. Not if they valued their hands.

Matt was more daring than his two companions. When Ren got close enough, he grasped her hips and pulled her into his body so that his hips cradled hers. One hand remained on her hip while the other slid to the small of her back.

He held her tight against him and they danced while Daryl and Jace came in close, hands in the air, to shield them from everyone else.

They danced through several songs until sweat glimmered on her skin. The air was alive around her. Excitement was contagious.

She was having the time of her life. She’d needed tonight and Lucas had known it. He always knew it when she herself didn’t even realize it. Her heart squeezed and unconsciously she searched him out in the crowded club.

She found him standing inside the enclosure of his table. He was behind the railing, his hands down, curled around the metal as he watched her dance. She could feel his gaze on her, knew he watched her every movement. There were people around him but she knew with no false modesty that they didn’t exist. Nothing existed for him but her.

Feeling deliciously naughty, she turned so it wouldn’t appear she was focused on Lucas and then she began to give him his own private show. Granted it was in front of hundreds of other people and anyone could see, but he would know it was for him only and that she didn’t care about anyone else. Just him.

Jace and the others stood back a little, their expressions a mixture of “holy shit” and “I want some of that.” Ren slid her hands down her body, drawing attention to her breasts, her hips and to the line of her legs.

She let them linger on the swells of her ass and then moved them back up to cup her breasts through the thin top. If she thought he could actually see that far, she’d give him a glimpse of nipple, but the only people who’d enjoy that particular spectacle were the men Lucas had charged to dance with her and she’d only tease them so far.

She rolled her hips, then her shoulders. She closed her eyes, tilted back her head and ran her hands through her hair and then back down her body as if she were in the throes of ecstasy.

So into her dance was she that she didn’t realize that Jace, Daryl and Matt moved to the side. When she opened her eyes, Lucas was standing there, his eyes dark and possessive.

Wordlessly he stalked forward, curled his finger between her collar and the sensitive flesh of her throat and pulled her forward. It was a gesture she associated with possession. A reminder to her and to anyone looking who she belonged to.

He surrounded her, his body pressing hotly to hers and then he began to dance with her.

He wrapped his arm around her, cupped her ass and pressed her harder into his groin. They swayed and undulated in rhythm, their bodies so meshed together that it looked like they were fucking on the dance floor.

It had been a long time since he’d danced with her. He was a private person. Not much of an exhibitionist. He never minded that she loved to dance but most of the time he stood watch over her from a distance while she indulged in her love of music.

Tonight he owned her on the dance floor just like he owned her everywhere else. His brand was on her for the world to see.

As the music swelled, he pushed her downward and she swayed her hips as she slid down his body. When she reached his groin, he held her in place as he mimicked fucking her mouth.

Around them the crowd went wild at the erotic sight. His fingers fisted in her hair as he held her in place. The ridge of his cock was hard against her chin. He stared down at her, his eyes glittering with harsh arousal.

After a moment he pulled her roughly back up, turned her around and pulled her back against him until her ass was cradled to his groin. With one hand he pushed at her head, forcing her forward and then he slid the hand down her bare back, over the tattoo and then wrapped his fingers in her hair once more.

This time he pulled so that her head came up but she remained bent at the waist. His pelvis ground erotically against her ass, just like he was fucking her from behind.

The air grew thick around them. The mood had changed swiftly in the club. Other couples were being more daring. More sexual. It was an intense and beautifully erotic demonstration.

Lucas straightened her but kept her tightly pressed to him. His hand splayed over her rib cage but then his fingers delved lower, underneath the waistband of the tight skirt she wore.

She sucked in her breath as he slipped past her panties, found her wetness and his finger circled her clit.

By now she was beyond caring who watched. She was only aware of Lucas. How he commanded her body. How sensual she felt, cupped to his body as music flooded into their bodies, forcing them to move in a timeless rhythm.

She reached both arms up over her head and circled them back around his neck so that it arched her chest forward. To her surprise, Jace moved in close, slid his hands up her belly underneath her top to cup her breasts.

Her eyes widened and she held her breath, caught between the two men, one her lover, the other someone she’d merely danced with.

“Breathe,” Lucas said in her ear. “He won’t go further than I’ve instructed.”

Immediately she gave in. Sensing that any protest she may have launched had passed, Jace rubbed his thumbs over her taut peaks while Lucas fingered the ultrasensitive flesh between her legs.

Daryl and Matt were on either side of Ren so that she was completely boxed in by the four men. Not much was visible to the others on the dance floor but no one could possibly doubt what Lucas and Jace were doing to her.

And she didn’t give a flying fuck. She wanted to come. Here between these two badass men.

Lucas bent to nip sharply at her neck and then said loudly enough in her ear so she could hear, “Do you want his mouth on you, Ren?”

It was a shocking question, one she’d never imagine he’d actually ask. Lucas wasn’t the type to ask. If he wanted Jace to touch her more intimately, he’d simply allow it. If he didn’t, nothing she said or did would change his mind. Now she was unsure of how to answer.

“It isn’t a trick,” Lucas said. “Just answer the question.”

His fingers stroked harder then slid lower to play at her entrance.

“Yes!” she choked out. “God, yes.”

The warm chocolate of Jace’s eyes caught fire. He looked like he’d been granted the keys to the kingdom. His big hands moved with surprising gentleness over her breasts and then he simply lifted her top, pushing it higher as he knelt in front of her.

Oh dear God, she couldn’t believe this was happening in the middle of Lucas’s club and that she didn’t care. Lucas moved his hand to allow Jace access, and he gripped her hip, holding her solidly in place. As if she needed any urging to remain still for what was coming.

First Jace’s mouth touched her belly, right over her navel ring. Followed by the rough edge of his tongue. It rasped over her delicate skin, eliciting a moan too low for anyone to hear. But Lucas felt it. She knew he did.

Jace licked a path straight up her midline until he reached the area right between her breasts. He kept those big hands cupped on either side of her breasts to shield as much of her from view as possible, but even with the other two men standing on either side of her and Jace going to lengths to hide her, there was no way they wouldn’t be seen by the other club goers.

He drew away and then his mouth hovered just over her nipple. His hot breath danced across the puckered tip and she tensed in anticipation.

Finally his mouth closed hot and wet over her nipple and her knees nearly buckled. Lucas’s grip tightened around her waist to support her and his hand slid back into her skirt, down to stroke gently over her clitoris once more.

Jace alternated teasing each nipple. He’d lick, nibble and suck in turns until she was begging Lucas to let her come. Lucas kept her on the edge, stroking until she was ready to explode and then stopping to pull her back, allowing Jace to continue fanning the flames with his wicked mouth.

“Do you want his fingers inside you?” Lucas asked against her ear.

This time she didn’t even hesitate. She’d do anything at all to achieve release.

“Yes!”

She felt him nod in Jace’s direction and suddenly one of Jace’s hands slid up her leg, over her knee and to the inside of her thigh. He was up on his knees, his head level with her breasts. He brushed over the smooth lips of her pussy and then she felt Lucas use his fingers to spread them for the other man.

The action nearly had her orgasming on the spot.

She began to tremble. She shook from head to toe as Jace sucked her nipple strongly into his mouth again. His thumb found her entrance and plunged inside just as Lucas began fingering her clit again.

It was too much. The room spun around her in dizzy circles. The music was a distant roar. The lights twinkled like fairy dust, and she could no longer make sense of any of it.

Jace withdrew his thumb and then slid two blunt fingers inside her just as Lucas lightly pinched her clit between his thumb and forefinger.

“Come, Ren. Come all over his hand.”

She needed no further urging. Her body bucked violently. Daryl and Matt pushed in closer, their bodies adding support so she didn’t fall.

Jace’s teeth grazed her nipple, each touch sending more spasms of delight straight to her pussy. While Lucas bit into her neck, Jace nipped sharply at one nipple, their fingers performing magic in the most sensitive places on her body.

She was no longer capable of standing on her own. She went limp against Lucas, trusting that as always, he’d never let her fall. He held her closely, kissing and licking gently at her neck while Jace worked her slowly down from her orgasm.

She lay there several long seconds, slumped in Lucas’s arms, her breaths coming in ragged bursts. Then Lucas carefully straightened her clothing. Jace withdrew his hand from underneath her panties and arranged her skirt.

He stood to his full height again as the music and dancing continued on around them.

With Lucas’s help, she got her feet underneath her again and stood, though she still leaned into Lucas.

“You may kiss him and offer your thanks,” Lucas directed.

Ren walked into Jace’s arms, leaned up on tiptoe with his help and kissed him on the lips. He swept his tongue over hers, tasting her, allowing her to briefly taste him before he pulled away.

“Thank you,” Ren said so he could hear.

He chucked her affectionately on the cheek. “Any time, sugar.”

Lucas walked her back to the stairs where they’d come down. Daryl, Matt and Jace walked back with them, surrounding them on all sides. At the stairs, two of the bouncers took over and the three men melted back into the crowd, gone before she could blink.

She continued up the steps with Lucas, still in a post-orgasmic fog. They drew the stares of many. Lucas had never been so bold with her, though they’d gotten a little frisky at Lucas’s table before. But never something so open and public. It was …different. Not something she would have thought Lucas would do. In private? All bets were off. There was nothing she’d put beyond him whether it was one man or a dozen. Though it hadn’t ever happened with her, she had no illusions about how far he was willing to take things.

Lucas saw her into her seat and then motioned for the waitress who had taken a nearby post.

“Water for Ren and I’ll take a beer.”

The waitress was back quickly but then she’d likely anticipated precisely what Lucas would order. Lucas didn’t often deviate from his routine and his usual order only consisted of a variety of three drinks.

Ren drank thirstily of the water and leaned back, suddenly exhausted by the dancing and the mind-blowing orgasm. What she wouldn’t give for a good snuggle and a comfortable bed.

Lucas reached over to curl his hand around her nape. He rubbed a thumb up and down the line of her neck as he continued to survey the goings on in the club.

As they sat and he rubbed her neck, her growing more lethargic and content by the minute, several people stopped by to speak with Lucas. She tuned out the conversation and concentrated instead on his touch. She closed her eyes and absorbed the delicious sensation of his fingers, the heat of his hand, the comfort in knowing she belonged to him.

For an hour longer, she watched people come and go from Lucas’s table. He talked easily with his customers, business associates and VIPs. He held court like a pro, never going to others but allowing them to come to him. Even the rich and famous came to him, their ego stroked that he allowed them to enter his inner circle.

Then he turned to her, lifted her hand to press a kiss to the back of her wrist and said, “Are you ready to go?”

She nodded, not bothering to defer to what he wanted. He’d asked and she wouldn’t lie. She’d gotten what she came for and what he’d brought her for. Her mind was much freer of the weight it had borne for the last few days.

CHAPTER 11

Cole wasn’t sure how he felt about his meeting with Lucas Holt. He wanted to dislike the man. A damn lot. But it was hard when he seemed so …decent.

He sighed and glanced at the clock. He was ill at ease. He was fucking nervous, and that pissed him off. He felt like he was preparing for some kind of goddamn test that he didn’t know the answers to.

Lucas was a cagey bastard, and he’d caught Cole completely and utterly off guard with his proposal. It had been on the tip of Cole’s tongue to refuse. It enraged him on Ren’s behalf. But then he remembered those damn rules. Or rather that there were no damn rules in the lives that he, Lucas and Ren had chosen. Only those they made themselves.

And then, when his anger and surprise had abated, he knew that there was no way in hell he could walk away from this kind of opportunity. He wasn’t entirely certain what Lucas’s motives were in offering Ren to him on a silver platter, but what Cole did with the chance was what mattered.

He had another chance to make Ren love him. To make up to her all the pain he’d caused her. To show her the man he’d become.

He’d become more focused. Intense. He had a harder edge now and that might scare the shit out of her. He wasn’t the same young man who adored her beyond reason and was a hesitant participant in their experimentation. He wasn’t even sure he could be that man any longer.

It was a choice he agonized over. Show her the truth and take the chance that she’d never come back to him. Or lie to her and withhold the true part of himself forever.

Neither held any appeal but he knew he couldn’t lie to her or himself. Lucas had warned him of the consequences of such an action. Ren would suffer no pretenses and he was fiercely glad of it. He wanted honesty between them.

He had two weeks. Two weeks to win back the woman he’d never stopped loving. And at the end of that time, he had to hope like hell that she’d choose him because he couldn’t face losing her a second time. The first time had changed him irrevocably. This time would destroy him.

Ren sat between Lucas’s knees as the limousine slid down the highway to God only knew where. Lucas had been cryptic on details and very explicit on how she was to dress and what she was and wasn’t to wear.

She was on her knees, legs apart, the folds of her silk skirt fanned out on the floorboard. The top she wore had a plunging neckline that emphasized her full breasts and barely covered her nipples.

It was an outfit put together with access in mind. He wanted unfettered access to her.

He was distant though. And preoccupied. Whether it was business or something else entirely, she wasn’t sure, but he seemed restless and cagey and she knew from experience that he was harder and rougher when he was in such a mood.

He slid his hand down the middle of her chest and then impatiently pushed aside the material covering her breasts. He thumbed her nipple idly, almost as if he couldn’t quite decide what he wanted to do with her.

It was unusual for Lucas to show clear indecision and she wondered what could possibly be occupying his mind that he was so distracted.

Abruptly, he slid his finger between the band of her collar and her skin and yanked forward until she was leaning against him, her belly pressed to his crotch. He kissed her. Hard.

She felt …branded. Like he was proving all over again that she belonged to him. His teeth bit into her lip, drawing blood, and then he licked over the tender area, sweeping the blood away and onto his tongue.

She wanted to ask him what bothered him, but knew that particular boundary between them shouldn’t be breached. He was private, and if he wanted her to know, he would tell her.

As he pulled away, he held her face in one hand, his grip firm as he stared into her eyes. He looked as though his control was barely leashed and that he might toss her down and take her roughly.

Her breath caught and held with anticipation. Her body tingled and came alive. Her clit pulsed and ached. Her breasts tightened, her nipples hardening.

“How well you know me,” he murmured.

He stroked his hand over her cheek and then over the lip he’d nipped, soothing away the slight ache. His features hardened, and she shivered at the sudden infusion of darkness into his eyes.

“Get up on the seat. On your hands and knees.”

She rose up on her knees, crawled over his left leg and onto the long seat he was slouched in. Her palms sank into the sumptuous leather and her knees pressed just at the seam between two sections of the seat.

She felt him move behind her. A cool rush skittered over her ass as he pushed her skirt to her waist and allowed it to bunch there.

“There are two things I want tonight,” he said, the rasp of arousal deep in his voice. “My mark on your ass and my cum inside your body when we arrive.”

She almost asked where they were going but held her tongue. He wouldn’t have liked that slip. She shifted restlessly, aching for his hand against her bottom.

The slap, when it came, startled her and sent her forward. She braced herself against the seat and pushed back, begging silently for more. He loved when she did that.

He rubbed his palm over the burning spot to soothe the hurt and then administered another stinging blow to her other cheek. She moaned softly. With another man, that might have gotten her into trouble. But Lucas loved to hear her sounds of passion. He liked to know he pleased her even though her purpose was to please him.

He encouraged her uninhibited responses as long as it fell within the boundaries of obedience. If she enjoyed what she experienced, he expected her to express it. If she didn’t enjoy it, she was also free to express that as well, but it may or may not cause it to end.

Lucas followed a simple rule. If it wasn’t harmful—and by harmful, he meant causing her permanent physical or psychological damage—then she had no choice but to endure it. Afterward, he might invite her to tell him why she didn’t like the experience and he would then consider whether he would ever make her suffer it again.

Cole hadn’t been her only dominant lover. There had been a total of four in the last ten years since Cole. Lucas was her favorite, though. He …He just got her. He understood her. He wasn’t out to prove his masculinity or his power. He wasn’t afraid to be wrong or to make mistakes, though she couldn’t ever remember a time when he’d done anything she considered a mistake.

It probably sounded dramatic but she couldn’t think of much she wouldn’t do for Lucas. And it was because she trusted him. A component that had been lacking in her last relationship, and consequently it had been her shortest.

The next blow caught her unaware for the sheer brutality of it. The pain shocked her and suddenly Lucas’s hand was wrapped in her hair and he yanked her back, forcing her head so that their gazes met.

“Am I boring you, Ren? Would you prefer to be somewhere else?”

Her mouth twisted in dismay because it was the last thing she wanted him to think. “I’m sorry, Lucas. I was thinking.”

His hold loosened only slightly. “What were you thinking that was more important than me?”

“I was thinking of you,” she said honestly. “I was comparing my relationship with you to the others I’ve had.”

His hand gentled and he ran his fingers through her hair in a gentle pet. “Do you know what I love most about you, Ren?”

The question startled her. She’d expected his anger. Not this sudden …affection.

“You tell me the truth, no matter how awkward or potentially uncomfortable. It would be so easy to lie and say you drifted away or that you were thinking about where we’re going. Why is that?” he finished softly.

Her brow wrinkled in confusion. His hand soothed over the subsiding burn where he’d marked her, stroking and caressing.

“Why do I not lie to you?”

“I suppose that’s what I’m asking. I know that you’re inherently an honest person, but even the most honest person will seek not to make herself vulnerable to another.”

Her expression eased and she locked gazes with him. “Because I trust you not to use my vulnerability against me.”

His eyes went warm with approval. He leaned down and softly pressed his lips to hers.

“Now tell me how our relationship compares to your previous ones.”

She twitched against his palm, eager to feel the burn again. His hand stilled and then he pressed another kiss to her forehead in apology.

“I’m neglecting your need. When I’m finished administering the appropriate marks to your sweet ass and when I’ve availed myself of your body, then we’ll finish this conversation.”

She sighed her relief and gifted him with a smile.

“How hard and rough do you want it, Ren? I find I’m in a mood tonight. I’m not usually so indecisive but I go back and forth between wanting to allow my darker urges free or showering you with tenderness. I’m in an affectionate mood and then you smile at me like that and it only reinforces my desire to show you gentleness instead of power.”

She raised her head and settled back on her heels, allowing her hair to spill down her back. He had one knee on the floorboard and she turned her head to the side so she could look at him.

“I am yours, Lucas. Do with me as you will. I will love whatever it is you choose to bestow on me and I’ll take it without complaint.”

He lifted his hand to cup her cheek. His eyes shimmered with dark promise. “I am very glad to hear those words. Especially tonight.”

She cocked her head to the side, rubbing her cheek along his palm. She didn’t ask him why. She simply waited for what he would tell her. Or not tell her.

“Tonight I’m going to give you to another.”

She went completely still, shock rendering her unable to move or react. She stared back at him, but he too was waiting and in no hurry to further explain.

“Does that excite you?”

“I don’t know. It’s …surprising.”

“Why would you find this surprising? I’ve discussed with you in the past that I find enjoyment in giving the woman I own to another man so that I can watch and enjoy.”

She nodded. “It’s just that you never have. In the beginning I expected it. But as more time went on, you seemed content not to share me with other men.”

“Does it bother you that I seek to do so now?”

She frowned, unsure of how she felt. She’d considered such a thing just a short time ago and found that the idea excited her. The idea. There was a huge difference between what sexually excited her in theory and what actually aroused her in reality.

More than once, a kink that she was excited to try turned out to be something she didn’t enjoy at all. Would this follow in the same vein?

Now she wondered if the night out at the club had been a mere taste of what was to come. Had he tested her to see how receptive she was to having another man’s hands and mouth on her body?

And what had prompted him to take this step now? Was he bored with her? That thought sent panic and dismay racing along her spine. Had their time together come to an end? She shook the idea away because there was no way she could hold it together thinking such things.

“Ren,” he prompted.

“It doesn’t bother me that you would do it,” she said slowly. “I’m unsure of whether I would enjoy it. The idea excites me, but it also frightens me. My trust in you is absolute but doesn’t extend to another man.”

He stroked her cheek again. “All very valid points. And if I told you the man in question was Cole Madison?”

Her eyes widened in shock. Her pulse bounded, firing so rapidly that for a moment she swayed, suddenly dizzy.

“Cole?” she whispered.

She closed her eyes and foregoing all discipline, she turned away from Lucas. He didn’t reprimand her nor did he force her to look back at him. He slid back onto the seat behind her, silent, as he waited.

Then, “Take off your skirt, Ren.”

Her eyes flew open and she blinked. Her fingers were curled into tight fists on the seat between her splayed thighs.

“You have precisely three seconds to do as I’ve told you or you will regret it.”

The bite in his voice slid over her like a razor. She was numb with shock. And questions. She had so many questions.

Was this some bizarre test?

“One,” he said quietly.

She jolted to awareness. Lucas never had to punish her for disobedience. It would be the height of disrespect were she not to perform his order.

She scrambled upward in the seat, pulling at her skirt until it pooled at her feet. She kicked it away, but she still didn’t face him. She didn’t want him to see how undone she was.

“Now the top.”

She fumbled with the tie at her nape, loosening it so that it fell down her waist, uncovering her breasts.

He got up and moved to the back of the limo, to the seat that faced forward. The rasp of his zipper sounded loud in the dead silence. He lifted his hips to shove his jeans down over his hips, but he left them there, then pulled his cock over the band of his underwear and fisted it, pumping up and down, bringing the already hard length to even greater erection.

“Get on your hands and knees on the floor. Present your ass to me. Face the divider.”

She rose, careful not to bump her head on the roof.

“Crawl to me,” Lucas ordered.

She went down to the floor and then maneuvered on her hands and knees until she faced him. Then she turned to do as he’d told her and waited, ass pressed against the seat, his legs on either side of her hips.

He gripped her behind and then pushed her forward as he scooted to the edge of the seat. She started to walk her hands forward to give him more room, but he administered a sharp blow to her ass in reprimand.

She went still, palms dug into the floor, mouth trembling, her mind in chaos.

He reached underneath her legs, hooked his arms and yanked her up and back so that she was unbelievably spread, her body tilted downward and her feet hit the back of the seat.

Instead of thrusting into her, he reached down, positioned his cock at her entrance and then gripped her legs and pulled her onto him.

The position forced her elbows to bend and her cheek now rested on the floor. Her breasts were flattened against the rough carpet.

He slid his arms from underneath her and gripped her waist with both hands, moving down to anchor at her hips. He eased her forward and then yanked her back again, seating himself deeply inside her.

Each bump in the road, every slight dip, even the rougher surface of parts of the highway. She felt them all. One hand left her hip and he reached down to tug at her hair.

“Now, let’s discuss a few things. Who do you belong to, Ren?”

She made sure she could be heard. “You.”

He yanked her back again, taking her breath away. He was hard. Very hard. He felt so rigid inside her. Almost like she could feel the anger pulsing from him through his cock and into her body.

“If I choose to give you to another man, is it my right?”

“Yes.”

“If I give you this time with a man who once meant something to you, you will be grateful and you will thank me. Furthermore, you will do everything he tells you. Are we understood?”

Her stomach clenched and her chest tightened. “Yes.”

“It is for you I do this, and you will not shame me.”

“Never,” she whispered, broken over the mere thought of bringing shame to this man.

“If I have the driver pull over to the side of the road and tell you to fuck him, you’ll do it.”

“Yes, Lucas.”

“If I tell you to allow him to do anything he likes with your beautiful body, you’ll do it.”

“Yes.”

By now he was shoving roughly into her. He was no longer just pulling her onto his cock. He was meeting each pull with a powerful thrust. She closed her eyes and allowed the pleasure of his ruthless possession to wash through her.

She loved this above all else. Loved the rawness and brutality when he took her and spoke so explicitly to her. In that moment, part of her wished he would order the driver to pull over. The image of her bent over the back of the car, the driver pounding into her from behind while Lucas stood guard, satisfaction and approval glittering in his eyes, set her senses on fire.

If there had been any doubt as to whether she’d enjoy having Lucas watch while another man took her, it was gone. Now she imagined Cole pushing into her body. Cole commanding her. Cole’s hands hard and rough on her skin. His cock punishing her. All while Lucas watched, silent and approving.

Her orgasm shimmered through her like ripples on the surface of a lake. Lucas stopped and leaned forward, forcing his weight on her, pressing her face harder into the floor.

“Oh no you don’t,” he said harshly. “We have several things to clear up, Ren. If you come, I’ll bruise that pretty ass of yours so you can’t sit for a week.”

She groaned, knowing full well he’d do just that. She wanted to come. Needed to come, but having a sore ass for a week wasn’t worth the immediate pleasure. She shut off the images of Cole that were bombarding her and focused instead on the sensation of Lucas uncomfortably wedged inside her pussy. The angle of his penetration was meant to be painful and not bring her pleasure.

Only when she had backed off the edge did he ease his hold and lean back to alleviate the pressure on her body. The burn inside her pussy eased and he stroked back and forth a few times until she was damp once more around him.

Without warning, he reached down and lifted her straight up, still buried deep inside her. He pulled her back, leaning so that she sat astride him, completely vulnerable, impaled on his rigid length.

And just as suddenly as he’d lifted her, he pushed her forward again until his cock came free and she stumbled off the seat.

“Lie down on your back,” he directed. “And give me your legs.”

She eased down onto the floor again and then inched herself toward him until he grasped her ankles. He jerked her forward, the carpet rough against her back. Then he pushed her legs back, curling her so that her weight was borne on her shoulders and her ass was presented to him.

He bent her legs double, which opened her even further to him. Then he gave her a satisfied smile.

“It seems to me if we’re going to have a meaningful conversation, I at least want to be able to look at your face. My dick in your ass shouldn’t provide distraction to a woman of your discipline.”

CHAPTER 12

Ren trembled in anticipation, her gaze focused solely on Lucas. She stared into his dark eyes as he rose over her and tucked his cock between her ass cheeks.

She was feeling vulnerable tonight. A little off kilter. It was a sensation she didn’t like. As much as she loved all of Lucas’s dark edges and embraced his willingness to push her as hard and as fast past that gray line of her limits, she was suddenly very unsure of herself.

Never had she felt so unsteady and so out of sorts. Instead of his ruthless dominance and possession, she wanted—no, she needed—his tenderness, a side, that while rarely shown or given, was as powerful, if not more so than his harder side.

Lucas froze, staring back at her, his eyes searching to her very depths. Slowly he unfolded her legs and pulled her gently toward him so her legs rested on either side of his hips. Then he simply reached forward, slid his hands underneath her shoulders and pulled her upward so she sat in his lap facing him.

Bewildered, she could only look on helplessly and wait for what was next. Had he seen what she’d tried so hard to keep from him? Had he plucked the thoughts right out of her head?

His palms glided up and down her back and she realized then he was indeed soothing her. Unexpected tears pricked her eyelids and then he enfolded her in his arms and held her close.

He didn’t say a word. He didn’t have to. He saw into her very heart. Every time. He always knew when he could push and when he couldn’t. He’d seen it now and instead of punishing her for being out of sorts, he offered her the strength and comfort she so desperately craved.

“Why are you so upset, my Ren?” he asked several long minutes later.

She clung to him, her face buried in his neck. He pried her away from him and gently wiped the tears from her cheeks with his thumb.

She hated that she was so weak in front of him. That she’d cried all over him. She never cried. She was always so careful to only show him her strength and quiet determination. He’d seen her not at her best, but he’d never seen her so …distraught.

“I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I do and I don’t. I’m so confused. I don’t know what I want.”

“That isn’t like you. You’re the most confident, self-assured woman I’ve ever known. You’re comfortable in your skin. You always know precisely what you want and you’ve never been bashful about pursuing it. I’ve always admired that about you.”

She laid her head back on his shoulder and wrapped her hand around the side of his neck, clutching at him, needing that contact. “You asked me what was different in our relationship or rather how our relationship differed from the others I’ve had. This, Lucas. This is what’s different.”

He stroked his hand through her hair. He pressed his lips to her forehead in the most gentle of kisses and then said, “Explain.”

“You get me. Really get me. It’s not all about you as a lot of people would assume a relationship where dominance is a factor would be about your needs and wants above all else.”

“Your happiness is important to me,” he said by way of agreement.

She sighed. “In all my other relationships, except one, it’s been more about the man. Not always or all the time but mostly. In all but one, my partner never had my complete trust. In all but one, I was never …home. You’re home to me, Lucas. I feel safe and cherished with you. I trust you.”

He seemed pleased by her heartfelt declaration. He squeezed her warmly and she could feel the pleasure seeping through him. That made her happy. She wanted him to know how much he meant to her. How much his protection meant to her.

“You said except one. Do you mean Cole?”

She took in a deep breath. “Yes. I was happy with Cole. My relationship with him mimicked a lot of the things I value most about my relationship with you. Only ours is a more grown-up version of what I had with him. I like to think if only Cole and I had had time that we could have grown into something like what you and I have now.”

“And yet the idea of me giving you to him distresses you,” Lucas murmured.

“I’m scared,” she admitted. “And confused. Maybe a little threatened, you know?”

He brushed his mouth over her temple, a simple gesture she felt all the way to her soul.

“Why, Lucas? Why are you doing it? I don’t understand. I’m afraid to dig too deeply for the answer.”

Before she hadn’t been willing to ask, but now she had to know. Was it a test? She wasn’t sure she could do this. He hadn’t done it to hurt her. She’d never believe Lucas would be that cruel. Which meant he had a specific reason for sending her back into the arms of the man who’d broken her heart.

He pulled her back just enough that he could touch her jaw, cup her chin, rub his thumb gently across her lips. So comforting. So very real.

“You say you trust me.”

She nodded without hesitation.

“Then trust me that this is what I feel is best for you. I think this is something you need. I would not do it if I thought it would hurt you. It may make you uncomfortable, but I think when all is said and done, this is for the best.”

The calm in his voice soothed her frayed nerves. She did trust him. Implicitly. He’d never steered her wrong. He’d never done anything without her best interests at heart.

And the truth was that she did want to see Cole again. She’d imagined what it would be like to have him touch her as he’d once done. Wondered if he’d even want to. She hadn’t been able to stop thinking about him since the night she and Lucas had gone to The House.

What had rattled her far more than her encounter with her first love was the guilt she’d felt for thinking of him ever since. Lucas was everything to her and yet she couldn’t stop thinking about a man who shouldn’t occupy her thoughts or her fantasies.

The fact that Lucas seemed to understand only made the guilt burn more brightly. That he’d gone as far as to make an arrangement with Cole because he thought it was something she needed made her want to curl into a ball of shame.

“Ren.”

Lucas’s soft admonishment had her looking up and tears gathered once more when she saw the understanding reflected in his eyes.

“Do you think I would be angry for you being human enough to feel emotion when confronted with someone you used to love? Do you think I would punish you for being honest enough with yourself and me to admit these feelings?”

He smoothed his hand down her cheek, wiping at the trail of moisture leaking down the side of her face.

“I’m angry at myself,” she choked out. “You don’t deserve this. I feel so disloyal.”

He smiled then. “Do you get angry when I glance fondly at a former lover when she comes my way?”

She frowned and shook her head.

“Why is that?”

“Because I know you feel nothing more than a passing affection for her now.”

Lucas nodded. “Exactly. Now, perhaps I do this so that it can be determined what exactly you feel for Cole Madison. I think it’s important, don’t you?”

Slowly she nodded, marveling at how logical and in control he was. She was a blubbering mess and he was a rock. Always her rock. She sighed and went into his arms again, rubbing her cheek against his chest.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “For understanding me.” For knowing when to be gentle and when to be hard and forceful. She left the last unspoken but he knew. He always knew.

Lucas reached up to lower the divider so he could speak to the driver. “You may take us to our destination now.”

Judging by the length of time they’d been riding, Ren assumed that Lucas had given the direction to just drive.

After the divider slid back up, Lucas leaned down to retrieve her clothing that was strewn on the floor.

“Get dressed and straighten your appearance. I’m sure you’ll want to look your best when you face your past.”

He touched her cheek then ran a finger over her still quivering lips.

“Show no fear, Ren. Show him the woman I know so well. The woman you’ve become. You have nothing to be ashamed of. If you do nothing else, show him just how big of a mistake he made by walking away from you.”

She smiled then and felt the warm brush of her confidence as it slid neatly back into place. Maybe Lucas was right. Maybe she did need to face Cole before she could move ahead to her future. A future she hoped with everything she had would include Lucas.