Nicholas and Alexandra

CHAPTER ELEVEN

“OTMA” and Alexis

DIRECTLY over the mauve boudoir of the Empress were the nurseries. In the morning, Alexandra could lie back on her couch and through the ceiling hear the footsteps of her children and the sound of their pianos. A private elevator and a private stairway led directly to the rooms above.

In these large, well-aired chambers, the four Grand Duchesses were brought up simply, in a manner befitting granddaughters of the spartan Alexander III. They slept on hard camp beds without pillows and took cold baths every morning. Their nurses, both Russian and English, were strict, although not without their own weaknesses. A Russian nurse assigned to little Olga was fond of tippling. Later she was found in bed with a Cossack and dismissed on the spot. Marie’s English nurse, a Miss Eager, was fascinated by politics and talked incessantly about the Dreyfus case. “Once she even forgot that Marie was in her bath and started discussing the case with a friend,” wrote the Tsar’s younger sister, Grand Duchess Olga Alexandrovna. “Marie, naked and dripping, scrambled out of the bath and started running up and down the palace corridor. Fortunately, I arrived just at that moment, picked her up and carried her back to Miss Eager, who was still talking about Dreyfus.”

The passage of time and the shortness of their lives have blurred the qualities of the four daughters of the last Tsar. Only Anastasia, the youngest, stands out distinctly, not for what she was as a child, but because of the extraordinary, often fascinating claims made on her behalf in the years after the massacre at Ekaterinburg. Yet the four girls were quite different, and as they became young women, the differences between them became more distinct.

Olga, the eldest, was most like her father. Shy and subdued, she had long chestnut-blond hair and blue eyes set in a wide Russian face. She impressed people by her kindness, her innocence and the depth of her private feelings. Olga had a good mind and was quick to grasp ideas. Talking to someone she knew well, she spoke rapidly and with frankness and wit. She read widely, both fiction and poetry, often borrowing books from her mother’s tables before the Empress had read them. “You must wait, Mama, until I find out whether this book is a proper one for you to read,” she parried when Alexandra spotted her reading a missing book.

Reading Les Misérables in French under the guidance of her Swiss tutor, Pierre Gilliard, Olga almost brought the tutor to calamity. Gilliard had instructed his pupil to underline all the French words she did not recognize. Arriving at the word spoken at Waterloo when the commander of Napoleon’s Guard was asked to surrender, Olga dutifully underlined “Merde!” That night at dinner, not having seen Gilliard, she asked her father what it meant. The following day, walking in the park, Nicholas said to the tutor, “You are teaching my daughter a curious vocabulary, Monsieur.” Gilliard was overcome with confusion and embarrassment. “Don’t worry,” said Nicholas, breaking into a smile, “I quite understand what happened.”

If Olga was closest to her father, Tatiana, eighteen months younger than Olga, was closest to Alexandra. In public and private, she surrounded her mother with unwearying attentions. The tallest, slenderest and most elegant of the sisters, Tatiana had rich auburn hair and deep gray eyes. She was organized, energetic and purposeful and held strong opinions. “You felt that she was the daughter of an Emperor,” declared an officer of the Imperial Guard.

In public, Grand Duchess Tatiana regularly outshone her older sister. Her piano technique was better than Olga’s although she practiced less and cared less. With her good looks and self-assurance, she was far more anxious than Olga to go out into society. Among the five children, it was Tatiana who made the decisions; her younger sisters and brother called her “the Governess.” If a favor was needed, all the children agreed that “Tatiana must ask Papa to grant it.” Surprisingly, Olga did not mind being managed by Tatiana; the two, in fact, were devoted to each other.

Marie, the third daughter, was the prettiest of the four. She had red cheeks, thick, light brown hair and dark blue eyes so large that they were known in the family as “Marie’s saucers.” As a small child, she was chubby and glowing with health. In adolescence, she was merry and flirtatious. Marie liked to paint, but she was too lazy and gay to apply herself seriously. What Marie—whom everyone called “Mashka”—liked most was to talk about marriage and children. More than one observer has noted that, had she not been the daughter of the Tsar, this strong, warmhearted girl would have made some man an excellent wife.

Anastasia, the youngest daughter, destined to become the most famous of the children of Nicholas II, was a short, dumpy, blue-eyed child renowned in her family chiefly as a wag. When the saluting cannon on the Imperial yacht fired at sunset, Anastasia liked to retreat into a corner, stick her fingers into her ears, widen her eyes and loll her tongue in mock terror. Witty and vivacious, Anastasia also had a streak of stubbornness, mischief and impertinence. The same gift of ear and tongue that made her quickest to pick up a perfect accent in foreign languages also equipped her admirably as a mimic. Comically, sometimes cuttingly, the little girl aped precisely the speech and mannerisms of those about her.

Anastasia, the enfant terrible, was also a tomboy. She climbed trees to dizzying heights, refusing to come down until specifically commanded by her father. She rarely cried. Her aunt and godmother, Grand Duchess Olga Alexandrovna, remembered a time when Anastasia was teasing so ruthlessly that she slapped the child. The little girl’s face went crimson, but instead of crying, she ran out of the room without uttering a sound. Sometimes Anastasia’s practical jokes got out of hand. Once in a snowball fight, she rolled a rock into a snowball and threw it at Tatiana. The missile hit Tatiana in the face and knocked her, stunned, to the ground. Truly frightened at last, Anastasia broke down and cried.

As daughters of the Tsar, cloistered at Tsarskoe Selo without a normal range of friends and acquaintances, the four young Grand Duchesses were even closer to each other than most sisters. Olga, the eldest, was only six years older than Anastasia, the youngest. In adolescence, the four proclaimed their unity by choosing for themselves a single autograph, OTMA, derived from the first letter of each of their names. As OTMA, they jointly gave gifts and signed letters. They shared dresses and jewels. On one occasion, Baroness Buxhoeveden, one of the Empress’s ladies-in-waiting, was dressing for a ball when the sisters decided that her jewels were inappropriate. Tatiana rushed off and reappeared with some ruby brooches of her own. When the Baroness refused them, Tatiana was surprised. “We sisters always borrow from each other when we think the jewels of one will suit the dress of the other,” she said.

Rank meant little to the girls. They worked alongside their maids in making their own beds and straightening their rooms. Often, they visited the maids in their quarters and played with their children. When they gave instructions, it was never as a command. Instead, the Grand Duchesses said, “If it isn’t too difficult for you, my mother asks you to come.” Within the household, they were addressed in simple Russian fashion, using their names and patronyms: Olga Nicolaievna, Tatiana Nicolaievna. When they were addressed in public by their full ceremonial titles, the girls were embarrassed. Once at a meeting of a committee of which Tatiana was honorary president, Baroness Buxhoeveden began by saying, “May it please Your Imperial Highness …” Tatiana stared in astonishment and, when the Baroness sat down, kicked her violently under the table. “Are you crazy to speak to me like that?” she whispered.

Cut off from other children, knowing little about the outside world, they took the keenest interest in the people and affairs of the household. They knew the names of the Cossacks of the Tsar’s escort and of the sailors on the Imperial yacht. Talking freely to these men, they learned the names of their wives and children. They listened to letters, looked at photographs and made small gifts. As children they each had an allowance of only nine dollars a month to spend on notepaper and perfume. When they gave a present, it meant sacrificing something they wanted for themselves.

In their youthful aunt Grand Duchess Olga Alexandrovna, the girls had an intimate friend and benefactress. Every Saturday she came from St. Petersburg to spend the day with her nieces at Tsarskoe Selo. Convinced that the girls needed to get away from the palace, she persuaded the Empress to let her take them into town. Accordingly, every Sunday morning, the aunt and her four excited nieces boarded a train for the capital. Their first stop was a formal luncheon with their grandmother, the Dowager Empress, at the Anitchkov Palace. From there they went on to tea, games and dancing at Olga Alexandrovna’s house. Other young people were always present. “The girls enjoyed every minute of it,” wrote the Grand Duchess over fifty years later. “Especially my dear god-daughter [Anastasia]. Why I can still hear her laughter rippling all over the room. Dancing, music, games—why she threw herself wholeheartedly into them all.” The day ended when one of the Empress’s ladies-in-waiting arrived to take the girls back to Tsarskoe Selo.

In the palace, the two oldest girls shared a bedroom and were known generally as “The Big Pair.” Marie and Anastasia shared another bedroom and were called “The Little Pair.” When they were children, the Empress dressed them by pairs, the two oldest and the two youngest wearing matching dresses. As they grew up, the sisters gradually made changes in the spare surroundings arranged for them by their parents. The camp beds remained, but icons, paintings and photographs went up along the walls. Frilly dressing tables and couches with green and white embroidered cushions were installed. A large room, divided by a curtain, was used by all four as a combination bath and dressing room. Half the room was filled with wardrobes; behind the curtain stood a large bath of solid silver. In their teens, the girls stopped taking cold baths in the morning and began taking warm baths at night with perfumed bath water. All four girls used Coty perfumes. Olga preferred “Rose Thé,” Tatiana favored “Jasmin de Corse,” Anastasia stayed faithfully with “Violette” and Marie, who tried many scents, always came back to “Lilas.”

As Olga and Tatiana grew older, they played a more serious role at public functions. Although in private they still referred to their parents as “Mama” and “Papa,” in public they referred to “the Empress” and “the Emperor.” Each of the girls was colonel-in-chief of an elite regiment. Wearing its uniform with a broad skirt and boots, they attended military reviews sitting side-saddle on their horses, riding behind the Tsar. Escorted by their father, they began attending theatres and concerts. Carefully chaperoned, they were allowed to play tennis, ride and dance with eligible young officers. At twenty, Olga obtained the use of part of her large fortune and began to respond to appeals for charity. Seeing a child on crutches when she was out for a drive, Olga inquired and found that the parents were too poor to afford treatment. Quietly, Olga began putting aside a monthly allowance to pay the bills.

Nicholas and Alexandra intended that both their older daughters should make their official debuts in 1914 when Olga was nineteen and Tatiana seventeen. But the war intervened and the plans were canceled. The girls remained secluded with the family at Tsarskoe Selo. By 1917, the four daughters of Nicholas II had blossomed into young women whose talents and personalities were, as fate decreed, never to be unfolded and revealed.

“Alexis was the center of this united family, the focus of all its hopes and affections,” wrote Pierre Gilliard. “His sisters worshipped him. He was his parents’ pride and joy. When he was well, the palace was transformed. Everyone and everything in it seemed bathed in sunshine.”

The Tsarevich was a handsome little boy with blue eyes and golden curls which later turned to auburn and became quite straight. From the beginning, he was a happy, high-spirited infant, and his parents never missed an opportunity to show him off. When the baby was only a few months old, the Tsar met A. A. Mosolov, director of the Court Chancellery, just outside the nursery. “I don’t think that you have yet seen my dear little Tsarevich,” said Nicholas. “Come along and I will show him to you.”

“We went in,” said Mosolov. “The baby was being given his daily bath. He was lustily kicking out in the water.… The Tsar took the child out of his bath towels and put his little feet in the hollow of his hand, supporting him with the other arm. There he was, naked, chubby, rosy—a wonderful boy!”

“Don’t you think he’s a beauty?” said the Tsar, beaming.

Next day Nicholas said proudly to the Empress, “Yesterday I had the Tsarevich on parade before Mosolov.”

In the spring following his birth, the Empress took Alexis for rides in her carriage and was delighted to see the people along the road bowing and smiling before the tiny Heir. When he was still less than a year old, his father took him to a review of the Preobrajensky Regiment. The soldiers gave the baby a mighty “Hurrah!” and Alexis responded with delighted laughter.

From the beginning, the disease of hemophilia hung over this sunny child like a dark cloud. The first ominous evidence had appeared at six weeks, when the boy bled from his navel. As he began to crawl and toddle, the evidence grew stronger: his tumbles caused large, dark blue swellings on his legs and arms. When he was three and a half, a blow on the face brought a swelling which completely closed both eyes. From London, Empress Marie wrote in alarm: “[I heard] that poor little Alexei fell on his forehead and his face was so swollen that it was dreadful to look at him and his eyes were closed. Poor boy, it is terrible, I can imagine how frightened you were. But what did he stumble against? I hope that it is all over now and that his charming little face has not suffered from it.” Three weeks later, Nicholas was able to write back: “Thank God the bumps and bruises have left no trace. He is as well and cheerful as his sisters. I constantly work with them in the garden.”

Medically, hemophilia meant that the Tsarevich’s blood did not clot normally. Any bump or bruise rupturing a tiny blood vessel beneath the skin could begin the slow seepage of blood into surrounding muscle and tissue. Instead of clotting quickly as it would in a normal person, the blood continued to flow unchecked for hours, making a swelling or hematoma as big as a grapefruit. Eventually, when the skin was hard and tight, filled with blood like a balloon, pressure slowed the hemorrhage and a clot finally formed. Then, gradually, a process of re-absorption took place, with the skin turning from a shiny purple to a mottled yellowish-green.

A simple scratch on the Tsarevich’s finger was not dangerous. Minor external cuts and scratches anywhere on the surface of the body were treated by pressure and tight bandaging which pinched off the blood and allowed the flesh to heal over. Exceptions, of course, were hemorrhages from the inside of the mouth or nose—areas which could not be bandaged. Once, although no pain was involved, the Tsarevich almost died from a nosebleed.

The worst pain and the permanent crippling effects of Alexis’s hemophilia came from bleeding into the joints. Blood entering the confined space of an ankle, knee or elbow joint caused pressure on the nerves and brought nightmarish pain. Sometimes the cause of the injury was apparent, sometimes not. In either case, Alexis awakened in the morning to call, “Mama, I can’t walk today,” or “Mama, I can’t bend my elbow.” At first, as the limb flexed, leaving the largest possible area in the joint socket for the incoming fluids, the pain was small. Then, as this space filled up, it began to hurt. Morphine was available, but because of its destructive habit-forming quality, the Tsarevich was never given the drug. His only release from pain was fainting.

Once inside the joint, the blood had a corrosive effect, destroying bone, cartilage and tissue. As the bone formation changed, the limbs locked in a rigid, bent position. The best therapy for this condition was constant exercise and massage, but it was undertaken at the risk of once again beginning the hemorrhage. As a result, Alexis’s normal treatment included a grim catalogue of heavy iron orthopedic devices which, along with constant hot mud baths, were designed to straighten his limbs. Needless to say, each such episode meant weeks in bed.^*

The combination of exalted rank and hemophilia saw to it that Alexis grew up under a degree of care rarely lavished on any child. While he was very young, nurses surrounded him every minute. When he was five, his doctors suggested that he be given a pair of male companions and bodyguards. Two sailors from the Imperial Navy, named Derevenko and Nagorny, were selected and assigned to protect the Tsarevich from harm. When Alexis was ill, they acted as nurses. “Derevenko was so patient and resourceful, that he often did wonders in alleviating the pain,” wrote Anna Vyrubova, an intimate friend of the Empress. “I can still hear the plaintive voice of Alexis begging the big sailor, ‘Lift my arm,’ ‘Put up my leg,’ ‘Warm my hands,’ and I can see the patient, calm-eyed man working for hours to give comfort to the little pain-wracked limbs.”

Hemophilia is a fickle disease, and for weeks, sometimes months, Alexis seemed as well as any child. By nature he was as noisy, lively and mischievous as Anastasia. As a toddler, he liked to scoot down the hall and break into his sisters’ classroom, interrupting their lessons, only to be carried off, arms waving. As a child of three or four, he often made appearances at the table, making the round from place to place to shake hands and chatter with each guest. Once he plunged beneath the table, pulled off the slipper of one of the maids-of-honor and carried it proudly as a trophy to his father. Nicholas sternly ordered him to put it back, and the Tsarevich disappeared again under the table. Suddenly the lady screamed. Before replacing the slipper on her foot, Alexis had inserted into its toe an enormous ripe strawberry. Thereafter, for several weeks he was not allowed at the dinner table.

“He thoroughly enjoyed life—when it let him—and he was a happy, romping boy,” wrote Gilliard. “He was very simple in his tastes and he entertained no false satisfaction because he was the Heir; there was nothing he thought less about.” Like any small boy’s, his pockets were filled with string, nails and pebbles. Within the family, he obeyed his older sisters and wore their outgrown nightgowns. Nevertheless, outside the family, Alexis understood that he was more important than his sisters. In public, it was he who sat or stood beside his father. He was the one greeted by shouts of “The Heir!” and the one whom people crowded around and often tried to touch. When a deputation of peasants brought him a gift, they dropped to their knees. Gilliard asked him why he received them thus, and Alexis replied, “I don’t know. Derevenko says it must be so.” Told that a group of officers of his regiment had arrived to call on him, he interrupted a romp with his sisters. “Now girls, run away,” the six-year-old boy said, “I am busy. Someone has just called to see me on business.”

Sometimes, impressed by the deference shown him, Alexis was rude. At six, he walked into the waiting room of his father’s study and found the Foreign Minister, Alexander Izvolsky, waiting to see the Tsar. Izvolsky remained seated. Alexis marched up to the Minister and said in a loud voice, “When the Heir to the Russian Throne enters a room, people must get up.” More often, he was gracious. To one of his mother’s ladies-in-waiting who had done him a favor, the Tsarevich extended his hand in an exact imitation of his father and said with a smile, “It is really nice of you, you know.” As he grew older, he became sensitive to the subtleties of rank and etiquette. At nine, he sent a collection of his favorite jingles to Gleb Botkin, the doctor’s son, who drew well. Along with the jingles he sent a note, “To illustrate and write the jingles under the drawings. Alexis.” Then, before handing the note to Dr. Botkin to take to Gleb, Alexis abruptly crossed out his signature. “If I send that paper to Gleb with my signature on it, then it would be an order which Gleb would have to obey,” the Tsarevich explained. “But I mean it only as a request and he doesn’t have to do it if he doesn’t want to.”

As Alexis grew older, his parents carefully explained to him the need to avoid bumps and blows. Yet, being an active child, Alexis was attracted to the very things that involved the greatest danger. “Can’t I have my own bicycle?” he would beg his mother. “Alexei, you know you can’t.” “May I please play tennis?” “Dear, you know you mustn’t.” Then, with a gush of tears, Alexis would cry, “Why can other boys have everything and I nothing?” There were times when Alexis simply ignored all restraints and did as he pleased. This risk-taking behavior, common enough among hemophiliac boys to be medically labeled the “Daredevil reaction,” was compounded of many things: rebellion against constant overprotection, a subconscious need to prove invulnerability to harm and, most important, the simple desire to be and play like a normal child.

Once, at seven, he appeared in the middle of a review of the palace guard, riding a secretly borrowed bicycle across the parade ground. The astonished Tsar promptly halted the review and ordered every man to pursue, surround and capture the wobbling vehicle and its delighted novice rider. At a children’s party at which movies had been shown, Alexis suddenly led the children on top of the tables and began leaping wildly from table to table. When Derevenko and others tried to calm him, he shouted gaily, “All grown-ups have to go,” and tried to push them out the door.

By deluging him with expensive gifts, his parents hoped to make him forget the games he was forbidden to play. His room was filled with elaborate toys: There were “great railways with dolls in the carriages as passengers, with barriers, stations, buildings and signal boxes, flashing engines and marvelous signalling apparatus, whole battalions of tin soldiers, models of towns with church towers and domes, floating models of ships, perfectly equipped factories with doll workers and mines in exact imitation of the real thing, with miners ascending and descending. All the toys were mechanically operated and the little Prince had only to press a button to set the workers in motion, to drive the warships up and down the tank, to set the church-bells ringing and the soldiers marching.”

Like his father, Alexis was enthralled by military pageantry. From birth, he had borne the title of Hetman of all the Cossacks and, along with his toy soldiers, toy forts and toy gups, he had his own Cossack uniform with fur cap, boots and dagger. In the summer, he wore a miniature uniform of a sailor of the Russian navy. As a child, he said that he wanted most to be like one of the ancient tsars, riding his white horse, leading his troops into battle. As he began spending more and more time in bed, he realized that he would never be that kind of tsar.

Alexis had an ear for music. Unlike his sisters, who played the piano, he preferred the balalaika and learned to play it well. He liked nature and kept a number of pets. His favorite was a silky spaniel named Joy, whose long ears dragged on the ground. From a circus the Tsar acquired an aged performing donkey with a repertory of tricks. When Alexis visited the stable, Vanka, the donkey, expected to find sugar in his master’s pocket; if it was there, he turned it out with his nose. In the winter, Vanka was harnessed to a sled and pulled Alexis about the park.

Once Alexis was presented with the rarest pet of all, a tame sable. Caught by an old hunter in the depths of Siberia, it had been tamed by the old man and his wife, who decided to bring it as a present to the Tsar. The couple arrived, having spent every kopeck on the long journey. After the palace authorities had checked by telegram with their home village to make sure that the two were not revolutionaries, the Empress was informed. An hour later a message came back, instructing the old man and woman to come with the sable “as quickly as possible. The children are wild with impatience.” Later the old hunter himself described to a palace official what had happened:

“Father Tsar came in. We threw ourselves at his feet. The sable looked at him as if it understood that it was the Tsar himself. We went into the children’s room. The Tsar told me to let the sable go and the children began to play with it. Then the Tsar told us to sit down on chairs. He began to ask me questions. What made me think of coming to see him … What things are like in Siberia, How we go hunting … [The sable, meanwhile, was racing around the room, pursued by the children, leaving a trail of ruin.] Father Tsar asked what had to be done for the sable. When I explained, he told me to send it to the Hunters village at Gatchina. But I said,

“ ‘Father Tsar, that won’t do. All the hunters will be wanting to sell the skin of my sable. They will kill it and say the animal had an accident.…’

“The Tsar said:

“ ‘I would have chosen a hunter I could trust. But perhaps after all you are right. Take it back with you to Siberia. Look after it as long as it lives. That is an order you have received from me.… But mind, don’t forget to look well after the sable; it’s my sable now. God be with you!’ ”

The old man was given a watch crested with the Imperial eagle and the old woman a brooch. They were paid generously for the sable and also given money to travel home. But the children were inconsolable. “There was no help for it,” they said. “Papa had made up his mind.”

Pets were only a substitute for what Alexis really wanted: boys his own age as playmates. Because of his hemophilia, the Empress did not want him to play often with the small Romanov cousins who appeared infrequently at the palace with their parents. She considered most of them rough and rude, and she was afraid that they would knock Alexis down while playing their games. His most constant companions were the two young sons of Derevenko the sailor, who played with Alexis while their father watched. If the play got rough, Derevenko growled and the three children obeyed immediately. Later, carefully selected young cadets from the military academy were instructed as to the danger involved and then brought to the palace to play with the Tsarevich.

More often, Alexis played with his sisters or by himself. “Luckily,” wrote Gilliard, “his sisters liked playing with him. They brought into his life an element of youthful merriment that otherwise would have been sorely missed.” Sometimes, by himself, he simply lay on his back staring up at the blue sky. When he was ten, his sister Olga asked him what he was doing so quietly. “I like to think and wonder,” said Alexis. “What about?” Olga persisted. “Oh, so many things,” he said. “I enjoy the sun and the beauty of summer as long as I can. Who knows whether one of these days I shall not be prevented from doing it?”

More than anyone else outside the family, Pierre Gilliard understood the nature of hemophilia and what it meant to the Tsarevich and his family. His understanding developed gradually. He came to Russia from Switzerland in 1904 at the age of twenty-five. In 1906, he began tutoring Alexis’s sisters in French. For six years, he came to the palace almost every day to tutor the girls without ever really knowing the Tsarevich. He saw the boy as a baby in his mother’s arms; later he caught glimpses of him running down a corridor or out in the snow riding his sled, but nothing more. Of Alexis’s disease the tutor was almost completely ignorant.

“At times, his visits [to his sisters’ classroom] would suddenly cease and he would be seen no more for a long time,” Gilliard wrote. “Every time he disappeared, the palace was smitten with the greatest depression. My pupils’ [the girls] mood was melancholy which they tried in vain to conceal. When I asked them the cause, they replied evasively, ‘Alexis Nicolaievich is not well.’ I knew that he was prey to a disease … the nature of which no one told me.”

In 1912, at the request of the Empress, Gilliard began tutoring Alexis in French. He found himself confronted with an eight-and-a-half-year-old boy “rather tall for his age … a long, finely chiseled face, delicate features, auburn hair with a coppery glint, and large grey-blue eyes like his mother.… He had a quick wit and a keen, penetrating mind. He surprised me with questions beyond his years which bore witness to a delicate and intuitive spirit. Those not forced to teach him habits of discipline as I was, could quickly fall under the spell of his charm. Under the capricious little creature I had first known, I discovered a child of a naturally affectionate disposition, sensitive to suffering in others just because he suffered so much himself.”

Gilliard’s first problem was establishing discipline. Because of her love and fear for him, the Empress could not be firm with her son. Alexis obeyed only the Tsar, who was not always present. His illness interrupted his lessons for weeks at a time, sapping his energy and his interest, so that even when he was well he tended to laziness. “At this time, he was the kind of child who can hardly bear correction,” Gilliard wrote. “He had never been under any regular discipline. In his eyes, I was the person appointed to extract work from him.… I had the definite impression of his mute hostility.… As time passed, my authority took hold, the more the boy opened his heart to me, the better I realized the treasures of his nature and I began to feel that with so many precious gifts, it was unjust to give up hope.”

Gilliard also worried about the isolation which surrounded Alexis. Princes inevitably live outside the normal routine of normal boys and, in Alexis’s case, this isolation was greatly intensified by his hemophilic condition. Gilliard was determined to do something about it. His account of what happened—of the decision by Nicholas and Alexandra to accept his advice and of the anguish they and Alexis suffered when a bleeding episode ensued—is the most intimate and moving eyewitness account available of how life was really lived in the inner world of Tsarskoe Selo:

“At first I was astonished and disappointed at the lack of support given me by the Tsaritsa,” wrote Gilliard.… “Dr. Derevenko [coincidentally, the Tsarevich’s doctor had the same name as his sailor attendant, although the two were unrelated] told me that in view of the constant danger of the boy’s relapse and as a result of the religious fatalism developed by the Tsaritsa, she tended to leave the decision to circumstance and kept postponing her intervention which would inflict useless suffering on her son if he were not to survive.…”

Gilliard disagreed with Dr. Derevenko. “I considered that the perpetual presence of the sailor Derevenko and his assistant Nagorny were harmful to the child. The external power which intervened whenever danger threatened seemed to me to hinder the development of will-power and the faculty of observation. What the child gained possibly in safety, he lost in real discipline. I thought it would be better to give him more freedom and accustom him to resist the impulses of his own motion.

“Besides, accidents continued to happen. It was impossible to guard against everything and the closer the supervision, the more irritating and humiliating it seemed to the boy and the greater the risk that it would develop his skill at evasion and make him cunning and deceitful. It was the best way to turn an already physically delicate child into a characterless individual without self-control and backbone even in the moral sense.

“I spoke … to Dr. Derevenko, but he was so obsessed by fears of a fatal attack and so conscious of the terrible responsibility that devolved on him as a doctor that I could not bring him around to share my view. It was for the parents and the parents alone to take a decision which might have serious consequences for their child. To my great astonishment, they entirely agreed with me and said they were ready to accept all risks of an experiment on which I did not enter myself without terrible anxiety. No doubt they realized how much harm the existing system was doing to all the best in their son and if they loved him to distraction … their love itself gave them the strength to run the risk of an accident … rather than see him grow up a man without strength of character.… Alexis Nicolaievich was delighted at this decision. In his relations with his playmates, he was always suffering from the incessant supervision to which he was subject. He promised me to repay the confidence reposed in him.

“Everything went well at first and I was beginning to be easy in my mind when the accident I had so much feared happened without warning. The Tsarevich was in the classroom standing on a chair, when he slipped and in falling hit his right knee against the corner of some piece of furniture. The next day he could not walk. On the day after, the subcutaneous hemorrhage had progressed and the swelling which formed below the knee rapidly spread down the leg. The skin, which was greatly distended, had hardened under the force of the blood and … caused pain which worsened every hour.

“I was thunderstruck. Yet neither the Tsar nor the Tsaritsa blamed me in the slightest. So far from it, they seemed intent on preventing me from despairing.… The Tsaritsa was at her son’s bedside from the first onset of the attack. She watched over him, surrounding him with her tender love and care and trying a thousand attentions to alleviate his sufferings. The Tsar came the moment he was free. He tried to comfort and amuse the boy, but the pain was stronger than his mother’s caresses or his father’s stories and moans and tears began once more. Every now and then, the door opened and one of the Grand Duchesses came in on tiptoe and kissed her little brother, bringing a gust of sweetness and health into the room. For a moment, the boy would open his great eyes, around which the malady had already painted black circles, and then almost immediately, close them again.

“One morning I found the mother at her son’s bedside. He had had a very bad night. Dr. Derevenko was anxious as the hemorrhage had not stopped and his temperature was rising. The inflammation had spread and the pain was worse than the day before. The Tsarevich lay in bed groaning piteously. His head rested on his mother’s arm and his small, deadly white face was unrecognizable. At times the groans ceased and he murmured the one word, ‘Mummy.’ His mother kissed him on the hair, forehead, and eyes as if the touch of her lips would relieve him of his pain and restore some of the life which was leaving him. Think of the torture of that mother, an impotent witness of her son’s martyrdom in those hours of anguish—a mother who knew that she herself was the cause of those sufferings, that she had transmitted the terrible disease against which human science was powerless. Now I understood the secret tragedy of her life. How easy it was to reconstruct the stages of that long Calvary.”

^* Today, at the first sign of severe bleeding, hemophiliacs are given transfusions of frozen fresh blood plasma or plasma concentrates. New non-habit-forming drugs are used to lessen pain. Where necessary, joints are protected by intricate plastic and light metal braces. Most of these developments in the treatment of hemophilia are quite recent. The use of plasma, for example, was a medical outgrowth of the Second World War, while the design of new lightweight braces is the result of new syntheses of metals and plastics. Hemophilia today is a severe but more manageable disease, and most hemophiliacs can survive the difficult years of childhood to live relatively normal adult lives.