Plum Spooky

TWENTY-FIVE

VINNIE WAS SAVED, I thought. I’d captured his big-ticket bond. My only outstanding was Gordo Bollo, and I’d go back to the produce ware house wearing a raincoat tomorrow. I had Munch’s body receipt in my bag, my monkey hanging on to my leg, and in three minutes, I’d be in my apartment and headed for a nice hot shower.

“I could make that shower a lot more fun,” Diesel said, opening the door to my apartment.

“Stop reading my mind.”

He reached around me, flipped the light on, and we stared into the black eyes and eerie pale face of Gerwulf Grimoire. There was a moment where anger flashed white-hot fire in Wulf’s eyes, and then it was gone, the transformation so fast and so complete, I wasn’t sure I’d actually seen the flare of emotion.

“Hello, cousin,” Wulf said, his voice perfectly composed. “Ms. Plum.”

“This is risky,” Diesel said to Wulf. “If I lay my hand on you, you’re mine.”

“Ah, but you won’t. I’ve acquired a new skill, as I’m sure you’ve noticed.”

“Why are you here?”

“I thought I’d spare you the task of dealing with Solomon Cuddles. I no longer need the barium. And I hated to leave without saying good-bye. Having you following me to the ends of the earth is the only real amusement in my life.”

“Jeez,” Diesel said, “that’s pathetic.”

“Perhaps, but the stakes in this game are high enough to keep it interesting.”

“It’s not a game,” Diesel said.

“It is to me,” Wulf said. “Isn’t it ironic that I was always the serious child, and now you’re burdened with your unpleasant job while I’m free to play.”

“What’s next?” Diesel asked him.

“I have a date with a witch,” Wulf said. “See you in Salem, cousin.”

Wulf did his fire-and-smoke thing, and when the smoke cleared, he was gone.

“Damn,” Diesel said. “I wish I knew how he did that.”

I fanned the smoke away. “My cousin Jessica lives in Salem. Actually, she’s next door in Marblehead. I haven’t seen her in a couple years, not since she moved from Trenton.”

There was a knock at my door, and for a moment, I thought it might be Wulf returning. Diesel opened the door, and Susan Stitch stood there.

“I’ve come back for my baby,” Susan said. “I knew I could count on you to take good care of him. I hope he was a good boy.”

“Yeah, he was an angel,” I said. “No problemo.”

Carl jumped at Susan and wrapped his arms around her neck.

“Kiss, kiss,” Susan said. “Mommy loves Carl!”

Diesel took Carl’s leash off the kitchen counter and gave it to Susan.

“Oh, yum,” Susan said, eyeballing Diesel. “Are there any more of you on the shelf?”

“How was your honeymoon?” I asked Susan.

“Excellent,” she said. “Really excellent.”

I closed the door on Susan and rolled my eyes at Diesel. “Yum?”

“Hey, I’m yum. Deal with it.”

I bent to unlace my wet sneakers. “Can a monkey be, you know, special?”

“Unmentionable?”

“Yeah.”

“Good question,” Diesel said.

I felt his hand on my ass, and I stood and turned to face him, but he was gone.