Second Chance

Chapter 82

AS THEY WALKED hand in hand toward her Castro apartment, Cindy admitted to herself that she was scared shitless.

This was the fifth time she and Aaron Winslow had been out together. They had seen Cyrus Chestnut and Freddie Hubbard at the Blue Door; been to Traviata at the opera; taken the ferry across the bay to a tiny Jamaican cafe that Aaron knew. Tonight, they had seen this dreamy film, Chocolat. o matter where this went tonight, she enjoyed being with him. He was deeper than most men she'd dated, and he was definitely more sensitive. Not only did he read unexpected books like Dave Eggers's A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius and Amy Tan's The Bonesetter's Daughter, he lived the life that he preached. He worked twelve-to-sixteen-hour days and was loved in his neighborhood, but he still managed to keep his ego in check. She'd heard it over an dover again interviewing people for her story: Aaron Winslow was one of the good guys.

All the while, though, Cindy had felt this moment looming in the distance. Hurtling closer and closer. Ticking. This was the natural step, she told herself. As Lindsay would say, their foxhole was about to explode.

“You seem a little quiet tonight,” Aaron said. “You okay, Cindy?”

“I'm great,” she fibbed. She thought he was just about the sweetest man she had ever gone out with, but, Jesus, Cindy, he's a pastor. Why didn't you think of this then? Is this a good idea? Think it through. Don't hurt him. Don't get hurt yourself.

They stopped walking in front of the entrance to Cindy's building and stood in the lighted arch. He sung a line from an old R&B tune, “I've Passed This Way Before.” He even had a good singing voice.

There was no use postponing it any longer. “Look, Aaron, someone has to say this. You want to come up? I'd like it if you did, hate it if you didn't.” He exhaled and smiled. “I don't exactly know where to take this, Cindy. I'm a little out of my range. I, uh, I've never dated a blonde before. I wasn't expecting any of this.” “I can relate to that.” She smiled. “But it's only two floors up. We can talk about it there.”

His lip was quivering slightly, and when he touched her arm it sent a shiver down her spine. God, she did like him.

And she trusted him.

“I feel like I'm about to cross this line,” he said. “And it's not a line I can cross casually. So I have to know. Are we there together? In the same place?”

Cindy elevated on her toes and pressed her lips lightly against his mouth. Aaron seemed surprised and at first he stiffened, but slowly he placed his arms around her and gave himself over to the kiss.

It was just as she had hoped, that first real kiss. Tender and breathtaking. Through his jacket, she could feel the rhythm of his heart pounding. She liked it that he was afraid, too. It made her feel even closer to him.

When they parted, she looked in his eyes and said, “We're there. We're in the same place.”

She took out her key and led him up the two floors to her place. Her heart was pounding.

“It's great,” he said. “I'm not just saying that.” A two-story wall of bookshelves and an informal open kitchen.

“It's you... Cindy, it seems silly that I haven't been up here before.”

“It wasn't for lack of trying.” Cindy grinned. God, she was so nervous.

He took hold of her again, this time giving her a longer kiss. He certainly knew how to kiss. Every cell in her body felt alive. The small hairs on her arms, the warmth in her thighs; she pressed herself against him. She wanted, needed, to be close to him now. His body was slender, but he was definitely strong.

Cindy started to smile. “So what were you waiting for?”

“I don't know. Maybe some kind of sign.” She herself into the grooves of his body, felt him come alive. “There's a sign,” she said, close to his face.

“I guess my secret's out now. Yes, I do like you, Cindy.”

Suddenly, the phone rang, almost blasting in their ears.

“Oh, God,” she groaned. “Go away; leave us alone.”

“I hope that's not another sign.” He laughed.

Each ring seemed more annoying than the last. Mercifully the answering machine finally kicked on.

“Cindy, it's Lindsay,” the voice shot. “I've got something important. Please. Pick. Up.”

“Go ahead,” Aaron said.

“Now that you're finally up here, don't use the time I'm on the phone to change your mind.”

She reached behind the couch, fumbled for the receiver, put it to her ear. "I wouldn't do this for anyone but you, she said.

“Funny; that's just what I was about to say Listen to this.”

Lindsay shared her news, and Cindy felt a rush of triumph surge through her. This was what she had wanted. It had been her angle that put Lindsay onto him. Yes!

“Mana`na,” she said, “and thanks for the phone call.” She placed the receiver down, squeezed back with Aaron, and looked into his eyes.

“You wanted a sign. I think I've got the best one in the world.” A glimmer lit her face.

“They found him, Aaron.”