The Chick Is In The Mail

To His Iron-Clad Mistress by Kent Patterson

You don't need no chain mail bra, dear.

You don't need no brass pants, too.

You don't need to dress in armor

When I'm snuggled close to you.

Don't think that you can charm me,

Or prove our love more real,

By buying all your underwear

From the boutique at U.S. Steel.

So what say we drop the hardware,

The swords and shields and toys,

And make love less like Sherman tanks,

And more like girls and boys.