Killian lifted a shaking hand to his face and leaned his forehead down against his palm. He was silent for a moment, but to Tavi that moment seemed days long. Maybe longer.
Tavi licked his lips and glanced at Fade, apparently asleep on the floor beside Gaius's cot. He wasn't sleeping. Tavi wasn't sure how he knew, but he felt certain that Fade was awake and listening carefully. The First Lord looked little different than when Tavi had last seen him. Gaius still seemed shrunken in upon himself, his face colorless and frail.
Sir Miles, who had been sitting at the replacement desk in one corner of the meditation chamber, methodically reading the messages sent to the First Lord, looked as though someone had kicked him in the stomach.
"I didn't mean for any of that to happen," Tavi said into the silence. "Neither did Max."
"I should hope not," Killian said in a mild voice.
"You…" Miles took a deep breath, clearly struggling to restrain his anger. Then he bared his teeth, and just as clearly lost the struggle. "You idiots!" he shouted. "You stupid, crows-begotten fools! How could you do something like this? What treacherous moron dashed the brains from your witless skulls?" He clenched his hands into fists and opened them again several times, as though strangling baby ducks. "Do you have any idea what you've done?"
Tavi felt his face heat up. "It was an accident."
Miles snarled and slashed his hand at the air. "It was an accident that the two of you left the Citadel when you knew you should stay close at hand? When you knew what was at stake?"
"It was my aunt," Tavi said. "I went to help her. I thought she was in trouble." Tavi felt his eyes blur with frustrated tears, and he scrubbed savagely at them with one sleeve. "And I was right."
"Your aunt," Miles growled, "is one person, Tavi. What you've done may have endangered the whole of Alera."
"I'm not related to the whole of Alera," Tavi shot back. "She's almost my only blood relation. My only family. Do you understand what that means? Do you have any family, Sir Miles?"
There was a heavy silence. Some of the anger faded from the captain's face.
"Not anymore," Miles said, his voice quiet.
Tavi's eyes went back to Fade, who lay in exactly the same position. Tavi thought he could feel a kind of quivering attention in him at Miles's mention of family.
Miles sighed. "But furies, boy. Your actions may have endangered us all. The Realm is only barely holding together. If word of Gaius's condition gets out, it could mean civil war. Attack from our enemies. Death and destruction for thousands."
Tavi physically flinched at the captain's words. "I know," he said. "I know."
"Gentlemen," Killian said, raising his head, "we all know what is at stake. Recriminations are useless to us for the time being. Our duty now is to assess the damage and take whatever steps we can to mitigate it." His blind eyes turned toward Tavi, and his voice took on a faint, but definite edge of frost. "After the crisis is past us, we will have time to consider appropriate consequences for the choices made."
Tavi swallowed. "Yes, sir."
"Damage," Miles spat. "That's a pretty way to phrase it. We don't have a First Lord to appear at the highest profile social functions of the entire Realm. When he doesn't show up, the High Lords are going to start asking questions. They're going to start spreading money around. Sooner or later, someone is going to realize that no one knows where Gaius is."
"At which point," Killian mused, "we can expect them to attempt some sort of action to test the First Lord's authority. Once that is done, with no response from Gaius, an attempt to seize the Crown will only be a question of time."
"Could we find another double?" Miles asked.
Killian shook his head. "It was little short of a miracle that Antillar was able to impersonate him at all. I know of no other crafter both capable and trustworthy enough. It may be best to make excuses for the First Lord for the remainder of Wintersend and focus on ways to respond to any probes from the High Lords."
"You think we can cow them?" Miles asked.
"I think that they will need time to become certain that they have an opportunity," Killian said. "Our response would be designed to extend that time in order to give the First Lord a chance to recuperate."
Miles grunted. "If the First Lord does not appear at Wintersend-or to the presentation of new Citizens to the Senate and Lords-his reputation may never recover."
"I'm not sure that we can reasonably hope to attain anything better," Killian replied.
"Um," Tavi said. "What about Max?"
Killian arched an eyebrow. "What about him?"
"If we still need him so badly, can't we get him out of holding?" Tavi shook his head. "I mean, we have the First Lord's signet dagger. We could issue an order."
"Impossible," Miles said flatly. "Antillar is accused of the deadly assault and attempted murder of a Citizen-and the son of a High Lord at that, not to mention two other young men who are already being groomed as Knights for Kalare's Legions. Antillar must be held by the civic legion until his trial. Not even Gaius can defy that law."
Tavi chewed on his lip. "Well. What if we… sort of got him out unofficially?"
Miles frowned. "A jailbreak." He scrunched up his nose in thought. "Killian?"
"Lord Antillus has never made Maximus's heritage a secret," Killian answered. "They'll hold him in the Grey Tower."
Miles winced. "Ah."
"What's the Grey Tower?" Tavi asked. "I haven't heard of it."
"It isn't a place one discusses in polite company," Killian replied, his voice tired. "The Tower is meant to be capable of containing any crafter in the Realm-even the First Lord, if necessary-so that not even the High Lords would be beyond the reach of the law. The Lords Council itself crafted the security measures around the Grey Tower."
"What kind of measures?" Tavi asked.
"The same as you might find around the palace, prominent jewelers, or a lord's treasury-only a great deal more potent. It would take several High Lords working in concert to furycraft a way in or out. And the Grey Guard stand watch on the conventional thresholds."
"Who are they?" Tavi asked.
"Some of the finest metalcrafters and swordsmen in the Realm," Miles said. "To get in without furycrafting, we'd have to kill some damned decent men to get Antillar out. And doing so during Wintersend would set half the Realm on our trail. He'd be useless to us."
Tavi frowned. "Bribery?"
Miles shook his head. "The Grey Guard are handpicked specifically because they have enough integrity to resist bribery. Not only that, but the law states that the Crown will pay a bonus of double the amount of any attempted bribe if the guardsman turns in whoever tried it. In the past five hundred years, not one Grey Guardsman has taken a bribe, and only a handful of idiots have attempted to give them one."
"There must be some way in," Tavi said.
"Yes," Killian said. "One can go through furycrafted guardians and wards too powerful to simply overcome, or one can fight his way through the Grey Guard. There are no other ways in or out." He paused for a beat, and said, "That's rather the point in having a prison tower in the first place."
Tavi felt himself flush again. "I only mean that there must be some course of action we could take. He's only there because he saved my life. Brencis was going to murder me."
"That was noble of Maximus."
"Yes."
Killian's voice turned severe. "The unpleasant truth is that the Cursors have little need of nobility. We desire foresight, judgment, and intelligence."
"Then what you're saying," Tavi said, "is that Max should have left me to die."
Miles frowned, but said nothing, watching Killian.
"You both should have brought the information to me first. And you certainly should not have left the Citadel without consulting me."
"But we can't leave him there. Max didn't even-" Tavi began.
Killian shook his head and spoke over him. "Antillar has been taken out of play, Tavi. There is nothing we can do for him."
Tavi scowled down at the floor and folded his arms. "What about my aunt Isana? Are you going to tell me that there's nothing we can do for her, either?"
Killian frowned. "Is there a viable reason for us to divert our very limited current resources to assist her?"
"Yes," Tavi said. "You know as well as I do that the First Lord was using her to divide what he suspected was an alliance of several High Lords. That he appointed her a Steadholder without consulting Lord Rivus in the matter. She has become a symbol of his power. If he has invited her to Wintersend, and something happens to her, it will be one more blow to his power base." Tavi swallowed. "Assuming she isn't dead already."
Killian was quiet for a moment. Then he said, "Normally, you would have a point. But we are now in the unenviable position of choosing which of Gaius's assets to sacrifice."
"She is not an asset," Tavi said, and his voice rang with sudden strength and authority. Miles blinked at him, and even Killian tilted his head quizzically. "She is my aunt," Tavi continued. "My blood. She cared for me after my mother died, and I owe everything in my life to her. Furthermore, she is an Aleran Citizen here at the invitation and in support of the Crown. He owes it to her to provide protection in her hour of need."
Killian half smiled. "Even at the expense of the rest of the Realm?"
Tavi took a deep breath through his nose. Then he said, "Maestro. If the First Lord and we his retainers are no longer capable of protecting the people of the Realm from harm, then perhaps we should not be here at all."
Miles growled, "Tavi. That's treason."
Tavi lifted his chin and faced Miles. "It isn't treason, Sir Miles. It's the truth. It isn't a pretty truth, or a happy truth, or a comfortable truth. It simply is." He stared at Miles's eyes levelly. "I'm with the First Lord, Sir Miles. He is my patron, and I will support him regardless of what happens. But if we aren't living up to the obligations of the office of First Lord, then how can we pretend to be justified in holding its power?"
Silence reigned.
Killian sat perfectly still for a long moment. Then he said, quietly, "Tavi, you are morally correct. Ethically correct. But to best serve the First Lord we must make a difficult choice. No matter how horrible it seems." Killian let Tavi absorb the words for a moment, then turned his head vaguely toward Miles in search of support. "Captain?"
Miles had fallen silent, and now stood leaning against the wall, studying Tavi with his lips pursed. His thumb rapped a quiet rhythm on the hilt of his sword.
Tavi met the old soldier's eyes and did not look away.
Miles took a deep breath, and said, "Killian. The boy is right. Our duty in this hour is to perform as the First Lord would wish us to-not to safeguard his political interests. Gaius would never abandon Isana after asking her here. We therefore owe it both to the First Lord and to the Steadholder to protect her."
Killian's lips shook a little as he pressed them together. "Miles," he said, a gentle plea in his tone.
"It's what Gaius would want us to do," Miles said, unmoved. "Some things are important, Killian. Some things cannot be abandoned without destroying what have we and our forebears have worked all our lives to build."
"We cannot base our decision on passion," Killian said, his voice suddenly raw. "Too much depends upon us."
Tavi lifted his head suddenly, staring at Killian as comprehension dawned. Then he said, "You were his friend. You were friends with Sir Nedus."
Killian answered quietly, his voice smooth, precise, and steady. "We served our Legion terms together. We entered the service of the Royal Guard together. He was my friend for sixty-four years." Killian's voice did not change as tears slid down from his sightless eyes. "I knew that she was coming to the capital, and that given our circumstances that she might not be secure in the palace. Nedus was protecting your aunt because I trusted him. I asked him to. He died because I put him in harm's way. And all of that changes nothing about our duty."
Tavi stared at him. "You knew my aunt was here? That she might be in danger?"
"Which is why I made sure Nedus knew to offer his hospitality," Killian said, his voice suddenly brittle and sharp. "She was supposed to stay in his manor until this situation settled. She would have been as safe there as anywhere. I cannot imagine what drove her to leave the manor-or why Nedus permitted it. He must have been trying to contact me, but…" He shook his head. "I didn't grasp what was happening. I didn't see."
"What if he had good reason to take the chance?" Tavi asked quietly. "Something he judged to be worth the risk?"
Killian shook his head and didn't answer.
"The boy is right," Miles said. "He was a Royal Guard in his own day and was never a fool. He was my patriserus of the blade. Rari's too. He knew better than anyone the risks in exposing the Steadholder. If he did so, he did it only because it was a necessity."
"Don't you think I know that?" Killian said quietly. "If I allow this to distract our focus, we may lose all of Alera. And if I ignore Nedus's sacrifice, it may mean that we are exposed to some unforeseen threat he was desperate to warn us about. I must choose. And I must not let my feelings, however strong, dictate that choice. Too much is at stake."
Tavi stared at Killian and suddenly perceived not the razor intellect and deadly calm of the Cursor Legate, but the deep and bitter grief of an old man struggling to hold himself together in the face of an overwhelming storm of anxiety, uncertainty, and loss. Killian was not a young man. The future of literally the entire Realm rested on his slender shoulders, and he had found them more brittle than strong beneath so heavy a burden. His fight to retain his control, to rely upon pure intellect to guide his choices, was his only defense against the storm of danger and duty that demanded that he act-and which instead held him pinned and motionless.
And Tavi suddenly understood what might tip that balance. He hated himself for thinking of the words. He hated himself for even considering saying them. He hated himself for drawing the breath that would carry them to the wounded, bleeding soul within the old man.
But it was the only way he could help Aunt Isana.
"Then the question is whether or not you trust Sir Nedus's judgment. If you do, and if we leave the Steadholder to her fate," Tavi said quietly, "then he will have died for nothing."
Killian bent his head sharply, as though to stare at a dagger suddenly buried in his guts.
Tavi forced himself to watch the old man's pain. The pain he'd driven hard into Killian in his moment of weakness. The pain he knew would compel Killian to act. There was another silence, and Tavi felt suddenly sick with an anger directed nowhere but at himself.
He looked up to find Miles staring at him, something hard in the captain's eyes. But he never stirred and did not speak, letting his silence stand substitute for his support.
"I don't know how we can help her," Killian said at last, his voice a croak. "Not with only the three of us."
"Give me Ehren and Gaelle," Tavi said at once. "Free them of their final exercise. Let them investigate and see what they can find. They don't have to know anything about Gaius. Isana is my aunt, after all. Everyone knows that already. It would be natural for me to ask for their help in finding her. And… I might be able to ask Lady Placida as well. She's one of the leaders in the Dianic League. The League has a vested interest in keeping my aunt safe. They might be willing to expend some effort to locate her."
Killian's shaggy white brows knitted together. "You know that she may already be dead."
Tavi inhaled slowly. His tactics, the topic of the discussion, and the horrible images running through his head were terrifying. But he kept his breathing steady, and spoke of nightmarish scenarios in a calm, reasoned tone, as if discussing theoretical situations in a classroom. "Logically, it is likely that she is alive," he said. "If the cutters we saw wanted her dead, they would have found her body next to Sir Nedus's and Serai's. But she was taken from the scene. I think someone hopes to make use of her somehow, rather than removing her entirely."
"Such as?" the old Cursor asked.
"Asking for her support and allegiance, perhaps," Tavi said. "Hoping to gain the support of a very visible symbol if possible, rather than simply destroying it."
"In your estimation, will she do so?" Miles asked.
Tavi licked his lips, thinking through his answer as carefully as he possibly could. "She has little love for Gaius," he said. "But even less for those who arranged the Marat attack on the Calderon Valley. She'd rather gouge out her own eyes than stand with someone like that."
Killian exhaled slowly. "Very well, Tavi. Ask Ehren and Gaelle to help you, but do not tell them it is my desire that they do so, and reveal nothing further to them of the situation. Contact Lady Placida to request her help-though I wouldn't expect her to be terribly eager to assist you. By delivering a message from Gaius to her in public, you have tacitly claimed that Lord and Lady Placida are loyalists."
"Are they not loyal?" Tavi asked.
"They are not interested in choosing sides," Killian replied. "But you may have forced them to do it. In my judgment, they will not be appreciative of your actions. Walk carefully when you see them."
Miles grunted. "Maestro, I have some contacts in town. Retired Legion, mostly. There are two or three men who I could ask to look into I Sana's disappearance. I'd like to contact them at once."
Killian nodded, and Miles pushed off the wall and headed for the door. He paused beside Tavi and glanced at the young man. "Tavi. What I said earlier…"
"Was completely justified, sir," Tavi said quietly.
Miles regarded the boy for a moment more, then the pain in Killian's features. "Maybe it wasn't enough."
The captain gave Tavi a stiff, formal nod and strode from the room, his boots thudding in a swift, angry cadence.
He left Tavi with Killian, Fade, and the unconscious Gaius.
They sat in silence for a moment. Gaius's breathing sounded steadier and deeper to Tavi, but it could have been his imagination. Fade stirred and sat up, blinking owlishly at Tavi.
"With the captain gone," Killian said, "I'll have to handle the First Lord's mail. I know you want to move immediately, Tavi, but I'll need you to read it to me before you go. It's on the desk."
"All right," Tavi said, rising and forcing himself not to give voice to an impatient sigh. He paced to the desk, sat on the chair, and took up a stack of about a dozen envelopes of various sizes, and one long, leather tube. He opened the first letter and scanned over it. "From Senator Parmus, informing the Crown of the status of the roads in-"
"Skip that one for now," Killian said quietly.
Tavi put that letter down and went to the next. "An invitation from Lady Riva to attend her yearly farewell gathering in-"
"Skip it."
He opened the next letter. "From Lord Phrygius, bidding the First Lord a merry Wintersend in his absence, which is due to military considerations."
"Details?" Killian asked. "Tactical intelligence?"
"Nothing specific, sir."
"Skip it."
Tavi went through several more routine letters such as those, until he came to the last one, in the leather scroll tube. He picked it up, and the case felt peculiar against his hand, sending a slow shiver up his spine. He frowned at the peculiar leather, then suddenly understood the source of his discomfort.
It was made from human skin.
Tavi swallowed and opened the tube. The cap made an ugly, quavering scraping sound against the substance of the tube. Tavi gingerly drew out a sheet of leather parchment, trying not to touch the case any more than he absolutely had to do so.
The parchment, covered in large, heavy letters, was also made from thin-scraped human skin. Tavi swallowed uncomfortably, and read over the message.
"From Ambassador Varg," he read. "And in the Ambassador's own hand, it says."
Killian's heavy white brows furrowed. "Oh?"
"It advises the First Lord that the Canim courier ship has arrived with the change of his honor guard and will depart the capital to sail down the Gaul in two days."
Killian thumped his forefinger against his chin. "Interesting."
"It is?" Tavi asked.
"Yes."
"Why?"
Killian rubbed at his chin. "Because it is absolutely not interesting. It is an entirely routine notification."
Tavi began to follow the Maestro's line of thought. "And if it is entirely routine," he said, "then why is it in the Ambassador's own hand?"
"Precisely," Killian said. "The Canim courier passes back and forth every two months or so. The Ambassador is permitted six guards at any one time, and four replacements are brought with every ship, so that no two guards spend more than four months on duty here. It is a common enough sight." He waved vaguely at his blind eyes. "Or so I am told."
Tavi frowned. Then he said, "Maestro, when I took that message to the Ambassador, he made it a point to tell me that he was having problems with rats. He… well indirectly pointed me at a hidden doorway, and I found an entry to the Deeps in the Black Hall."
Killian's frown darkened. "They found it, then."
"It was always there?" Tavi asked.
"Obviously," Killian said. "Gaius Tertius, I believe, made sure a way in was available to us, in the event that we needed to force entry. But I thought it undiscovered."
"Why would Varg take the time to tell us that he knew about it?" Tavi asked.
Killian mused for a moment and then said, "Honestly, I don't know. I can't think of any reason but for spite, to show us that he had not been deceived. But our knowledge of his knowledge could only have reduced any advantage he gained from knowing about the door-and it isn't like Varg to give away an advantage."
"I went down the passage a little," Tavi said. "I heard Varg's second, Sarl, speaking with an Aleran."
Killian's head tilted. "Indeed. What did they say?"
Tavi thought about it for a moment, then repeated the conversation.
"How nonspecific," Killian murmured.
"I know," Tavi said. "I'm sorry I didn't bring this to you at once, sir. I was scared when I left and I hadn't slept and…"
"Relax, Tavi. No one can go on forever without rest. Young men your age seem to need more than most." The old Cursor blew out a breath. "I suppose it's true for all of us. It bears thinking on, later, when there is less urgent business at hand," he said. "Is there any more mail?"
"No, sir. That's all."
"Very well. Then be about your assignment."
Tavi rose. "Yes, sir." He started for the door and paused. "Maestro?"
"Mmm?" Killian asked.
"Sir… do you know who the captain meant when he said that Nedus had also trained 'Ran'?"
Tavi saw Fade's attention snap toward him in the corner of his vision, but he didn't look at the slave.
"Araris Valerian," Killian replied. "His older brother."
"There was bad blood between them?" Tavi asked.
Killian's expression flickered with irritation, but his answer was in a patient voice. "They had a falling-out. They hadn't recovered from it when Araris was killed at First Calderon, with the Princeps."
"What kind of falling-out?" Tavi asked.
"The famous duel of Araris Valerian and Aldrick ex Gladius," Killian replied. "Originally, you see, Miles was to duel Aldrick over…" He waved a hand. "I forget. Some kind of disagreement over a woman. But on the way to the duel, Miles slipped and fell into the street into the path of a water wagon. It ran over his leg and shattered his knee so badly that not even watercrafters could make it entirely whole again. Araris, as Miles's second, fought the duel in his place."
"And that came between them?" Tavi asked. "Why?"
"Miles accused Araris of pushing him in front of the wagon," Killian said. "Said he did it out of a desire to protect him."
Tavi watched Fade in the corner of his eye, but the slave had gone completely still. "Is it true?"
"Had they faced one another, Aldrick would have killed Miles," Killian stated. There was no doubt whatsoever in his tone. "Miles was very young, then, not even fully grown, and Aldrick was-is-a terror with a blade."
"Did Araris really push Captain Miles?" Tavi asked.
"I doubt anyone will ever know the truth of it. But Miles was wounded too badly to accompany the Princeps and his Legion to the Battle of the Seven Hills. He was on the way to the Calderon Valley to rejoin the Princeps when the Marat attacked and began the First Battle of Calderon. Araris died beside the Princeps. Miles and his brother never saw one another again. Never had the chance to reconcile. I suggest you avoid the topic."
Tavi turned to look at Fade.
The slave averted his eyes, and Tavi could not read the man's marred features. "I see," he said quietly. "Thank you, Maestro."
Killian lifted a hand, cutting Tavi off. "Enough," the old man murmured. "Be about your duties."
"Yes, sir," Tavi said, and retreated from the meditation chamber to seek out Ehren and Gaelic.