Ask the Parrot

12

We’ve got a problem tonight,” Parker said, “getting to this track of yours.”

Lindahl put his beer can down. “What’s that?”

They were seated in the living room, eating acceptable pizza, Lindahl drinking beer, Parker water. Outside, full dark had arrived. The silent television set showed sitcoms, so nothing else had happened. In its cage, the parrot seemed mostly asleep, though every once in a while it swiveled its head and made a small gurgling sound and marched a bit in place.

Parker said, “They’re looking for two men. They don’t know if the two men are still together or if they separated. Once we get where your gun club card doesn’t count for anything, when we come to a roadblock and they see two men in the car, they’ll want ID from both.”

“And you can’t show any.”

“Nothing useful.”

Lindahl thought about that, chewing pizza. “The funny thing is,” he said, “once we get to the track, I can help you with ID, but not before.”

Parker frowned at him. “Help? How?”

“Every employee carries an encoded ID card,” Lindahl told him. “You wear it in a plastic sleeve hangs around your neck. I’m the one bought the machine, I chose it, I know how to use it. I could take your driver’s license, photograph it, change the information in the machine, print it out on one of our own laminated blanks. It won’t be perfect, but it’ll look a lot like the real thing.”

“But not till we get there,” Parker said.

“If my vehicle had a trunk—”

“No.”

“Well, it doesn’t, anyway. But the point is, if we can get you there, we can solve your ID problem.”

Parker thought about that. He saw what to do, but he didn’t like it. Lindahl was so unsure of himself, Parker needed to keep him on a tight leash, but now he couldn’t. If Lindahl had time off by himself, would he decide the hell with it, let’s call in the cops?

Whatever the odds, Parker would have to risk them. He said, “No, you don’t need me there. This machine of yours, it takes mug shots to go on the ID cards, right?”

“Sure.”

“There’s already a picture on my license. You’re going to keep everything the same on it except the name and the home address. You don’t need me there to make the change, you only need the license.”

Lindahl frowned. “You mean, go there by myself. That way, I’d have to go all the way there twice tonight.”

“The second time, I’ll drive,” Parker said. “It’s the only way we can do this, Tom. I can’t leave here without identification.”

“It’s over an hour, each way.”

“It’s up to you,” Parker told him. “We do it this way, or we don’t do it. Which do you want?”

Lindahl eyed his beer can. “I’d better switch to coffee,” he decided, and got up to go to the kitchen.