Bad Business

9

Marlene Rowley came to see me in the morning, wearing a yellow summer dress with blue flowers. She sat in a straight chair and crossed her legs, and showed me her kneecaps.

"Did you catch him yet," she said

"Depends what you mean by catch. Want some coffee?"

"No. What have you got?"

"I have him in a hotel room with another woman," I said.

"When?"

"Monday night."

"And you didn't report it?"

"Nope,"

"Why nor?"

"You feel that being in a hotel room with another woman is enough?" I said.

"No. I want proof. I want the sonovabitch caught with his pants down. Her too. Or them. Or whoever he's screwing."

"Three hours together in a hotel room would probably suffice in divorce court."

"I want it all," she said.

"You want to embarrass him," I said.

"Goddamned right," she said. "Do you have any idea? No. Of course you don't. You couldn't imagine how many dinner parties I ran for his stupid friends. How to make nice chitchat. How many hours at the day spa, so I'd look good. He's cheating on me? Look at me. I'm beautiful. I'm incredibly smart. I've been a perfect wife for him. People like me. They like him, the jerk, because he's married to me. If it weren't for me he'd be running a hardware store someplace. And he cheats on me?"

"Hard to imagine," I said.

"You're damned right. So you stay on him until you've got him cold. I want pictures."

"Pictures," I said.

"Of him and whatever bitch he's fucking."

"In the act," I said.

"Absolutely."

"Should I have them matted and framed?" I said.

"Are you being funny?" she said.

"Apparently not," I said.

"I expect results," she said. "And I expect them promptly. If you can't handle that, I'll find someone who can."

"Why don't you do that," I saicl.

"What?"

"Why don't you find somebody else to do this work," I said.

"No. Oh my God. No. I didn't mean that. Sometimes I'm so clear on things that I may be too abrupt. I want you. I don't want someone else. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I'm sorry."

I put both my hands up, palms toward her. And made a gesture for her to stop.

"I'm not offended," I said.

"I can pay you more," she said.

"My last job, I was paid four donuts," I said. "Your pay scale is fine."

"Then what?"

"I'll make you a deal," I said. "I'll get you evidence sufficient to demonstrate infidelity. And you stop telling me what it is and how to do it."

"I didn't mean to make you mad."

"I'm not mad," I said. "I'm just sort of inner-directed."

Marlene frowned a little and tried to look thoughtful.

"Well," she said. "Can we continue?"

"On my terms," I said.

"Oh, yes, certainly," she said. "That will be fine."

"Okay. I'll stay with your husband for a while, see what else surfaces."

"Thank you," she said.

"Sure."

We sat quietly for a moment. She shifted a little in the chair. She was wearing yellow sling-back heels and no stockings. Her legs were tan. It was May. I suspected artifice.

"I really do like you," she said. "Really." I nodded.

"Don't you think I'm good-looking?"

"I do," I said.

"I know I frighten a lot of rnen," she said. "You know-beautiful, educated, rich. Men feel threatened."

"I'm trying to be brave," I said.

"I think you are really good-looking too," she said.

"Guys at the gym are always telling me that," I said.

"It's hard being alone," she said. "And being a woman. I'm counting on you."

"Little lady," I said, "you're in good hands."

"Are you laughing at me?"

"With," I said. "Laughing with."