Bad Doctor

18

Chris Fowler.

Cayman Islands.

Chris jumps when his cell phone rings, then checks the screen.

Kathy.

He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath.

“Hello?”

“It’s me,” Carlos says, “Jimmy.”

“Is she-”

“Yeah. She’s dead.”

“How?”

“It’s better you don’t know.”

“Did she suffer?”

“Not that I could tell.”

They go silent a moment. Chris says, “You won’t tell me how you killed her?”

“When the police question you, the less you know, the better you’ll come across.”

“Okay.”

Carlos says, “Where’s the balance?”

“The-what?”

“The rest of the money. The other ten grand?”

Chris pauses to think. He paid Jimmy ten already. What if he pays the balance and finds out Kathy’s still alive? On the other hand, not paying Jimmy the rest of the money would be stupid. He’s in Chris’s house, for God’s sake! And paying him later would require another phone call. Right now, they’re good. The call from Kathy’s cell phone gives the appearance she’s alive. When Chris calls her back in a half hour, she won’t answer. He’ll space a few calls over the rest of the day, then call one of the neighbors to check on her. They’ll find the body and call the cops. Then the cops will call him.

In the Caymans.

He’s home free, since all calls between he and Jimmy were made with disposable cell phones.

“Hello?” Carlos says.

“Huh?”

“We’re on a time limit here, Chris. Where’s the rest of the money?”

“Oh. Sorry. In the garage, under the gas can. Behind the ladder.”

Carlos clicks the phone off, hands it to Charlie, who says, “He still thinks you’re Jimmy?”

“Yeah.”

“Did you tell him about me?”

“We were on speaker.”

“So?”

“Did you hear me tell him about you?” Carlos says.

“No, but I never know what you’re up to. You’re always scheming behind my back.”

“So you say. Endlessly.”

“Oh, really?” Charlie says. “Well, for your information, this killer-for-hire business was your idea, Mr. Big Shot Mafia man!”

“Your point?”

“If we get caught, I’m turning state’s evidence.”

“You don’t even know what that means.”

“Maybe not. But that won’t stop me from cutting a deal with the feds.”

“The feds, huh?”

“That’s right. And I’ll sing like a canary! Don’t think I won’t! And then you’ll be sorry.”

Sing like a canary?

Carlos rolls his eyes.

When Charlie gets worked up like this the best thing to do is humor him. Carlos softens his tone and says, “You’ve always had a gift for song.”

“You think?”

“Absolutely.”

Charlie smiles wistfully. “In a perfect world, I could have been the next Nathan Lane.”

“Wouldn’t that be something?” Carlos says.

“I’ve been cheated out of my birthright.”

“So true. Can we get our money now?”

“After we put Kathy’s phone back.”

This is only their second job, but the twins are already operating at a high level. Carlos handled Kathy’s cell phone with a handkerchief and used her right index finger to make the call to Chris. Then touched her finger to the speaker button, and held her fingers around the phone while he spoke. Then Kathy’s finger pressed the “end call” button.

So they’ve got a nice, clean fingerprint of Kathy calling her husband, establishing the last time she was alive. The police might be suspicious, but there’ll be no phone records on Chris’s phone, no way to prove he hired someone to kill his wife. Since Chris is in the Cayman Islands, the cops can’t link him to the murder directly. They’ll huff and puff, but in the end, they’ll have to rule it a random homicide, for lack of evidence.

The twins leave Kathy’s body the way they found it, place Kathy’s phone on the kitchen counter, and head to the garage to get their money. In ninety minutes they’ll be back in their trailer, on their mom’s tiny farm outside Dayton.

“We didn’t even have to kill her!” Charlie says.

“Let’s not tell Chris.”

“Or mom!” Charlie says.

They laugh.

Charlie says, “The fingerprint on the phone was a stroke of genius.”

“I agree,” Carlos says. “Thanks for saying so.”

“Good work should always be complimented. That’s what mom says.”

They shuffle out the door, lock it, and return the key to its hiding place.

Carlos smiles. The fingerprint on the phone was a nice touch.

How could he possibly know Kathy was left-handed?