Bruno’s Dream

23

Nigel was kneeling beside his twin brother’s bed. Will was sleeping heavily. Soft rain was running quietly, ceaselessly down the glass of the skylight. A very faint illumination from the lamp-lighted street showed the old brass-railed bedstead and Will’s large round face, flushed and swollen with sleep, a weight upon the pillow, the moustached upper lip twitching slightly.

The tossed bedclothes also revealed an outflung right arm clad in purple and white spotted pajama, a hand drooping over the edge of the bed, and a large plump left foot peeping out of another expanse of purple and white pajama. Nigel, armed with a length of rope, two thick bands of perforated rubber, and a smooth stick about twenty inches long, carefully contemplated the position of the hand and the foot.

He decided to start with the foot. He laid the stick and one end of the rope silently down upon the floor and approached the other extremity of the rope to the well-padded and rather fragrant sole of his brother’s foot, which seemed to be regarding him with an insolent expression. The rope ended in a slip-knot with the perforated band of rubber threaded onto the rope within the area of the knot. Nigel began very gingerly to draw the slip-knot over the insolent protruding foot without bringing it into contact with the sole. As the band of rubber descended onto the sheet it very lightly touched the roughened edge of the heel and Nigel quickly looked round. A faint smile appeared on Will’s face, but he continued to sleep, now uttering very light snores like little sipping noises. He shifted slightly, moving his legs, and as he did so Nigel, holding the upper side of the noose clear with his left hand, thrust his right hand deep into the mattress and drew the slip knot loosely up over Will’s ankle. He laid the upper part of the noose very lightly down across the pajamaed leg, ob serving Will’s face again, which continued to smile a little and twitch in between the snores.

Rising very quietly from his kneeling position Nigel now lifted the other end of the rope from the floor, and after contemplating the brass rails at the foot of the bed for a moment or two, led the free end of the rope between the rails close to the slumbering foot, out again two rails further back, and round the brass bed post on the far side of the bed. Holding the end of the rope bunched and high, he sidestepped noiselessly to the head of the bed and slid the second slip-knot with its perforated rubber bracelet through the head rails of the bed, past two rails, and out again round the brass bed post on the near side of the bed. The wrist, which was dangling free, presented fewer difficulties. Holding the centre portion of the rope well up with his left hand, Nigel caught the wrist in the swinging slip-knot and ventured to pull the knot tighter until it was touching the pajama cuff very lightly all round.

The machine was now almost complete. Nigel slung the loose centre of the rope over his shoulder and attended once more to the foot, tightening the knot very carefully just above the bone of the ankle. He adjusted the rope at the head and foot of the bed, pulling it down the rails towards the mat tress, and then stood back, drawing the middle of the rope steadily towards him. He picked up the stick and laid it against the rope and began quietly and deliberately to shorten the rope by twisting it about the stick.

Will woke up with a flurry and an exclamation. Nigel retreated, pulling hard on the rope and twisting faster. The slip knots tightened, the rubber bracelets clung, and Will’s wrist and ankle were drawn up taut against the rails at the head and foot of the bed. Will yelled.

”Sssh, Will, you’ll wake Auntie.”

”Damn you, you’ve done it again!”

”It’s more ingenious this time,” said Nigel. “I doubt if you will be able to get out.”

”You bastard!”

”The rubber is the essential thing. I ought to have thought of it earlier.”

”Loosen the rope, for Christ’s sake, you’re breaking my wrist.”

”I doubt that. Excuse me while I just maneuver this chair.” Keeping the rope taut with one hand, Nigel reached the other for a wooden upright chair which stood against the wall. Lean ing over he threaded the stick through, twisting it so that it was held braced against the two wooden rails under the seat of the chair. He sat down on the chair.

”Nigel, loosen it a bit, fuck you, the bloody rail is cutting into my wrist, it’ll open a vein.”

”I remember hearing a story like this once before. I shouldn’t struggle if I were you, it’ll only make things worse.”

Will, stretched out between the head and the foot of the bed, had contorted his body, his left hand struggling to curl round the brass rails to reach his captive right wrist. The fingers clawed without force at the tightened surface of the rubber bracelet.

”This damn thing will stop my circulation. Do you want to kill me?”

”Not quite. Stop struggling, Will, you’ll feel better.”

”Loosen the rope, you’re pulling me apart.”

”Say please.”

”Please, bugger you.”

Nigel moved the chair a fraction forward. “That’s not enough.”

”Lie still and relax your muscles and listen to me.”

”How can I listen when I’m in the most frightful pain?”

”You’re not in the most frightful pain. The pain is negligible. Listen to me.”

”Go to hell.”

”If you get treated like this it’s your own fault for being so violent. That’s something which you would have under stood long ago if you had been capable of thinking. Of course violent men get put into cages and stretched on racks by men who are less violent but more clever. It’s the only way to make them listen.”

”I’ll never listen to you, not if I have to scream for an hour. Loosen the rope, my ankle’s breaking.”

”No, it isn’t. You have listened, Will. The violent men do listen in the end, because it’s to their advantage. You remember that time when we were ten and I hung you up by your wrists from the scaffolding on the building site because you wouldn’t do what I wanted?”

”Yes, and I remember what I did to you after you let me down!”

”All right, but you also did what I wanted.”

”And damn stupid it was too. You always were a crazy pervert.”

”You see, you’ve quite forgotten that you’re supposed to be in pain.”

”I haven’t. You’ll kill me one day with one of your damn contraptions. I can feel my wrist bleeding. Could you look?”

”You can’t catch me that way, Will. If you don’t mind I think I’ll turn the light on. You’re an interesting sight.”

Nigel tilted his chair slightly and turned the electric light switch. An unshaded electric bulb above the bed revealed Will outstretched and twisted between his pinioned wrist and his pinioned ankle. The unbuttoned pajamas showed his braced polished chest with a runnel of jet-black curls running down the centre of it. Will jerked again, clawing at his caught wrist with his free hand. Then he lay still panting, eyes bulging, his flushed face turned full to Nigel, his gritted teeth flashing under his moustache. “You’ve tightened the rope again, damn you.”

”A little, possibly. There.”

”If you play this trick once more I’ll kill you.”

”No, no. Last time I admit was a little inefficient, but the damage you did to yourself getting out was entirely your own fault. If you’d just stayed still and heard what I wanted to say you’d have been quite unhurt.”

”You ought to be in a bin.”

”Don’t be silly. Ever since I was a child you’ve been using your fists upon me. My cleverness and ingenuity just make us quits. I wanted to tell you something important, entirely for your own advantage I may say, and as I knew you’d rush at me like a mad bull if I turned up without taking precautions I decided I must tie you up just once again.”

”You enjoy this sort of thing.”

”Perhaps I do, Will. You must just try to see it as a form of brotherly affection.”

”Christ!”

”Blood’s thicker than water, Will, especially twin blood.

You are the other half of myself, a weird brutish alien half, doubtless a lesser half, but connected to me by an ectoplasmic necessity for which love would be too weak a name.”

”You’ve always detested me, Nigel.”

”I am afraid you are very stupid and understand very little.”

”You peached on me about that bloody stamp.”

”A routine castigation, my dear Will. I have to set some limits to your misdoings.”

”You’ve always persecuted me.”

”In self-defense. And also a little because you need me. You need me as the brute needs the angel, as the tender back needs the whip and the suppliant neck the axe. Any juxtaposition of brutish material and spirit involves suffering.”

Nigel shunted the chair an inch backward and Will screamed.

”Stop it, Nigel, stop it, I’ll faint with pain!”

”Nonsense. There, is that better? Now will you stop twisting yourself about and attend to what I have to say.”

”Who’s been punching you? I’m glad to see somebody has.” One side of Nigel’s face was severely bruised, the bluish shadow turning to purple as it ringed the eye.

”Danby.”

”Danby? Why ever Danby? Not that I care. I’ll black the other eye for you when I get out of this.”

”Never mind. Listen, Will. Are you listening or do you want to be strung up any tighter?”

”I’m listening, bugger you, get on with it. Loosen the bloody rope a bit more, will you.”

”Please.”

”Please.”

”All right. Now listen. It’s about Adelaide.”

”About Adelaide? What about Adelaide?”

”You love Adelaide, don’t you.”

”If I do it’s no bloody business of yours. I know you’ve been after her. You tried to get hold of her when you came back to London.”

”No, I didn’t.”

”You keep away from Adelaide, or I’ll really do you. That girl belongs to me and I’ll have her. I’ll get her if I have to kill her in the process. What’s more she loves me.”

”So you imagine. But suppose there was somebody else?”

”How do you mean, somebody else? No one could possibly be after Ad, she doesn’t see anybody, she doesn’t go anywhere.”

”She doesn’t need to. It all happens at home.”

”What on earth do you mean? Christ, do you mean you-“

”No. Danby.”

”What do you mean, Danby? Don’t torture me!”

”Danby is Adelaide’s lover. Adelaide is Danby’s mistress. It’s been going on for years. I thought you ought to know.”

Will lay still, breathing deeply. Then he said quite quietly, “Nigel, let go of the rope. I promise and swear that I won’t hurt you.”

Nigel got up and drew the stick out between the rungs of the chair. He unwound the rope and the tension was loosened. Will turned stiffly and began to sit up on the bed. He groaned and began to pull at the tightened rubber manacle at his wrist. Nigel helped him to pull it off, and then loosened the anklet. Will, groaning softly, chafed the bruised flesh at wrist and ankle. He said, “I don’t believe you, Nigel.”

”It’s true.”

”Prove it.”

”Ask Adelaide. Meanwhile take a look at this. You know Danby’s writing.”

Nigel handed Will a small piece of paper which had been torn across several ways and stuck together again. The paper said, Sweet Adelaide, I think I’ll spend tonight in my bed and not in yours, as I’ll be in rather late. Sleep tight, little one. Your D.

Will studied the paper carefully. Then he uttered a long piercing shriek and turned and fell with his face into the pillow.

”Sssh, don’t make such a noise-“

Will sat up again, his face contorted, his jaw shuddering, grinning with pain and rage. “I’ll kill that man. I’ll kill her too.”

”Don’t be crazy, Will-“

”I’ll kill them. Years, you say. Years. And her stringing me along all that time and swearing there was nobody else and letting me give her presents and kiss her hands.”

”Yes, I know, but listen to me still-“

”And saying she wasn’t the marrying sort! Well, she’s not, she’s a bloody harlot! And I laid my life at her feet. I’ll cut her into ribbons. And I’ll kill him. I’ll go now and find them in their bed. Sweet Adelaide/ Oh Christ, I’ll die of this. Where are my clothes?”

”Stop, Will, stop and listen. I’ve hidden your clothes anyway, you won’t find them. Just listen to me-“

”Then I’ll go naked. Get out of my way, Nigel. You’ve driven me mad.”

”The door’s locked. Sit down, sit down.”

Will let go of the doorhandle, which he had been rattling. He stood rigid for a moment, his eyes rolling, and then collapsed back full length onto the bed with a moan, burying his face in his hands. “Oh Adelaide, Adelaide, I loved you, I loved you so.”

Nigel drew the chair up close. He caressed the mop of shaggy dark hair and the shoulders which were shuddering with dry sobs.

”Stop it, Will. You can’t do anything tonight. You’ve got to think it out. You know the truth now, and that gives you power over both of them. Think it out. And don’t try to hurt Adelaide. ‘Leave her to heaven and to those thorns that in her bosom lodge to prick and sting her.’ As for Danby, we’ll think of some way of punishing him. I’ll help you. We’ll do it together.”

Will had stopped sobbing and was sitting up, once more twisting and chafing his right wrist. His eyes were dull and vacant with misery, his mouth half open, dripping saliva. “To think that she-“

”Even she. I didn’t really cut your wrist, did I?”

”After our being children together and all. I thought-It’s like being betrayed by one’s mother.”

”Every man is betrayed by his mother.”

”I trusted her absolutely. I thought she had no other life. For years, you say. With that fat swine. I’ll carve him. And she loved me so much when she was a girl. And so pretty. And so innocent. We were happy then.”

”The three of us.”

”The three of us. We used to go about arm in arm, remember.”

”With her in the middle.”

”And have tugs of war going round lampposts.”

”You always won.”

”Do you remember the day when we told her about sex?”

”And she wouldn’t believe us!”

”God! It’s all so clear, so near.”

”And the building site and the waste land where we used to pick dandelions.”

”And climbing on the scaffolding.”

”And stealing the bricks.”

”And playing French and English.”

”And Grandmother’s Steps.”

”She belonged to the beginning of our life when everything was good.”

”Before we ran away.”

”Before the theatre.”

”Before all those awful things-you know.”

”I know. She was separate from all that. I felt she’d kept the early part somehow, kept our childhood, kept it for me.”

”Kept it all fresh, all pure.”

”Are you laughing at me, Nigel?”

”No, no. Come, you promised-“

”Did Adelaide go to see you, go to your place, after you came back to London?”

”No.”

”She was very funny about you then. I thought you were after her.”

”No, indeed.”

”Well, what’s your motive for telling me all this? What’s in it for you? You love her and you’re trying to come between us!”

”No!”

”You can’t have her and you don’t want me to.”

”No, I swear.”

”Well, why then? Is it just craziness? Or wanting to hurt me? Or wanting to hurt Danby?”

”Just craziness.”

”You hate Danby. You’ve got some sort of grudge against him. Is that it? What made him hit you, anyway?”

”No, Will, that isn’t it, that isn’t it at all.”

The increasing rain tapped on the dark skylight and ran down it in a steady stream. The brothers stared into each other’s eyes, sitting close together in the brightly lighted attic room with their knees touching.