Chronicle of a Blood Merchant

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

One summer day Xu Sanguan came home and said to Xu Yulan, “On the way back it seemed like no one who lives in our lane was at home. Everyone’s in the streets. I’ve never seen so many people in the streets before in my entire life. There are people with red armbands, and people marching, and people writing political slogans, and people pasting up big-character posters. The walls on the main street are covered with big-character posters. They paste them up one on top of the other, thicker and thicker, until it looks like the walls are wearing cotton-padded jackets. And I saw the county secretary, that fat guy from Shandong. He used to think he was really something. Whenever I used to see him, he would be holding a nice cup of tea in his hand, but now he’s got an old metal washbasin in his hand, and he keeps banging on it and cursing himself, saying he’s a dog through and through.”

Xu Sanguan said, “Have you heard? Do you know why the factories have shut down, and the stores are closed, and why there are no classes at the schools? You know why you don’t have to go fry dough? Why some people have hung themselves from trees, and some people are locked up in ‘cow sheds’ and beaten half to death? Do you know why? Do you know why as soon as Chairman Mao says something, people take what he said and make it into a song, and paint his words on the walls, and on the pavement, and on cars and ferry boats, on their sheets and pillowcases, on cups and cooking pans, and even on bathroom walls and the sides of spittoons? Do you know how it was that Chairman Mao’s name grew so long? Listen to this: He’s the Great Leader Great Teacher Supreme Commander and Helmsman Chairman Mao May He Live Ten Thousand Years! That’s fifteen words in all, and you have to say it in one breath, without missing a beat. You know why that is? Because the Cultural Revolution has arrived.”

Xu Sanguan said, “I’m only just now starting to understand what this Cultural Revolution is all about. It’s actually just a time for settling old scores. If someone offended you in the past, now’s the time to write a big-character poster about him and paste it on a wall on the street. You can accuse him of being an unreconstructed landlord, or a counterrevolutionary, or whatever. You can say whatever you like. There aren’t any courts or police these days anyway. There’s just a lot of different crimes. You can pick any one you like, put it up on a poster, and sit back and watch everybody hound whomever you’ve accused to death. These days when I lie in bed, I think to myself, maybe I should find an enemy too, write a poster, and settle some old score. But the only enemy I ever had was that bastard He Xiaoyong, and he was hit by a truck and killed three years ago. I’m a good man, and I haven’t made any other enemies all these years. That’s good, because at least I don’t have to worry about someone putting up a poster denouncing me.”

Before he had finished, Sanle pushed open the front door and rushed in with a shout of alarm, “Someone put up a poster on the wall of the rice store saying that Mom is a ‘broken shoe.’ ”

Xu Sanguan and Xu Yulan, frightened out of their wits, immediately ran over to the rice shop to see the poster on the wall. Sanle had not been mistaken. Among many other posters, there was indeed one that singled out Xu Yulan, saying that she was a “broken shoe,” a shameless tramp, saying that she had become a prostitute at the age of fifteen, saying that you could sleep with her for just two yuan a night, saying that the men she had slept with would fill up ten whole trucks.

Xu Yulan pointed at the poster and broke into a string of curses. “It’s your mama who’s the real ‘broken shoe’! Your mama’s the real tramp. She’s the one who’s a whore. Ten truck-loads? She’s slept with so many men the whole earth couldn’t swallow them all!”

Xu Yulan wheeled around to face Xu Sanguan and began to cry. “Only someone who’s had no sons and no hope of grandsons, who’s got boils growing on his head and running sores on his feet, only someone like that could be capable of spitting out this kind of venom.”

Xu Sanguan said to the people standing next to him, “This is slander, pure and simple. It says Xu Yulan became a prostitute at fifteen. Bullshit! You think I wouldn’t know if that were true? The night we got married, Xu Yulan left this much blood on the sheets.” Xu Sanguan drew a circle in the air with his hands. “If Xu Yulan was a whore at fifteen, you think I would have seen any blood on our wedding night?” Seeing that the other people in the store hadn’t replied, Xu Sanguan answered his own question, “Of course not!”

That afternoon Xu Sanguan called Yile, Erle, and Sanle to him and told them, “Yile, you’re already sixteen now. And Erle’s fifteen. Go out to the street and copy one of those posters. Doesn’t matter which one. Just copy one of them, and then paste it over the poster about your mom. Sanle, you’re still a snot-nosed little brat, so I guess all you can really do is carry a bucket of paste for the other two. Now remember, you can’t just tear down a big-character poster. These days, if you tear one of those things down, you’re a counterrevolutionary. Don’t even think about tearing them down. Just copy out a new poster and paste it over the other one. I can’t very well take care of this myself, because everybody will be looking. If you kids go, you won’t draw as much attention. You brothers better go get the job done before it gets dark.”

When night came, Xu Sanguan said to Xu Yulan, “Your three sons have pasted over that poster, so you can relax now. I doubt very many people saw it. There’re so many posters out there that no one could possibly get around to all of them. And they’re putting up new ones all the time. Before you can finish the first one, someone’s put another one on top of it.”

TWO DAYS LATER a group of people wearing red armbands came to Xu Sanguan’s house and took Xu Yulan away. They were planning to hold a massive struggle session in the town square. They had already found a landlord, dug up a rich peasant, located a rightist, caught a counterrevolutionary, and gotten hold of a capitalist roader in a position of power. They had everyone they needed except a prostitute. They said they had spent three days looking for a prostitute, and since there was only half an hour left until the meeting was to begin, they had finally found one. They said, “Xu Yulan, come with us. We need your help. This is an emergency.”

She didn’t come back until later that afternoon. When she returned, the hair on the left side of her head was all gone, but the hair on the right remained untouched. They had given her a “yin yang” haircut, neatly shaving half of her hair at the part, so that it looked like a rice paddy midway through the harvest season.

When Xu Sanguan saw her, he let out an involuntary cry. Xu Yulan moved over to the window, picked up the mirror from the sill, and after seeing herself in the mirror, began to sob.

“Now that I look like this, how can I show my face? How am I going to live? When I was walking home, they were all pointing and laughing at me. Xu Sanguan, I didn’t know how ugly I was yet. I knew they’d cut off half my hair, but I didn’t know it would be this ugly. I didn’t know until I looked in the mirror. Xu Sanguan, what am I going to do? Xu Sanguan, they cut off my hair at the struggle session. I heard the people below me laughing, and I saw my hair falling by my feet, so I knew they’d shaved my head, but when I tried to feel it with my hand, they slapped my face so hard my teeth hurt, and they said I wasn’t allowed to touch. Xu Sanguan, how am I going to go on living? It would be better to die. I don’t have anything against them, and they didn’t have anything against me. I don’t even know them. So why did they shave my head? Why didn’t they just let me die? Xu Sanguan, why don’t you say something?”

“What am I supposed to say?” Xu Sanguan said. Then he let out a long sigh. “There’s not a whole lot we can do now. You’ve got a ‘yin yang’ head. Nowadays women with hair like that are supposedly either ‘broken shoes’ or whores. There’s nothing much you can say, now that you’ve been made to look like that. No one will believe what you have to say for yourself. You couldn’t wash yourself clean even if you jumped into the Yellow River. You can’t go out anymore. You’ll have to stay in the house.”

Xu Sanguan helped shave off the other half of Xu Yulan’s hair, then kept her inside the house. Xu Yulan herself was perfectly willing to stay in, but the people in red armbands were not willing to let her. They would come and take her away every few days, dragging her along to their struggle sessions. At almost every struggle session held in town, no matter how big or small, Xu Yulan was always standing to one side. Most of the time she was just playing a supporting role.

Xu Yulan said to Xu Sanguan, “They’re not after me. They’re attacking other people. I just stand to one side and keep the ones who are being attacked company.”

Xu Sanguan told his sons, “Actually, they’re not attacking your mom. Your mom is just keeping those capitalist roaders and rightists and counterrevolutionaries and landlords company. She just stands to one side and pretends to be participating. Your mom is just playing a supporting role. What do I mean by a supporting role? Well, she’s like MSG. You can add MSG to any kind of dish, and it makes everything a little tastier.”

Later, they made Xu Yulan bring a stool out into the busiest part of the shopping street and stand on top of it. She stood atop the stool with a wooden sandwich board around her neck. They had made the sign especially for her. It read simply: XU YULAN, PROSTITUTE.

They escorted Xu Yulan to her spot, watched as she put the sign around her neck and stood up on the stool, then left. After they left, they forgot all about her. She stood there all day, looking left and right, waiting for them to come back. When the sun went down and the streets emptied, she began to wonder if they had forgotten that they had left her there. Only then did she make her way home, carrying the stool in one hand and the sign in the other.

She was left to stand on the street all day long many times. When she got tired of standing, she would sit down on the stool and pound her legs and rub her feet until she was ready to stand once more on the stool.

The place where she stood was quite a distance from the nearest public toilet. When she had to go to the bathroom, she would walk two blocks to the public toilet next to the rice shop, with the wooden placard still dangling around her neck all the while. Everybody would watch as she walked by, clasping the placard and, with averted eyes, remaining as closely as she could to the side of the road. When she arrived at the toilet, she would take off her sign and lean it against the wall. When she was finished, she would replace the placard around her neck and move back to her spot.

Standing on the stool was very much like participating in a struggle session. She had to stand with her head bowed in front of her, because criminals were expected to bow their heads in just such a manner. Xu Yulan stood on the stool with her head bowed, staring at her feet. But if she stared at one spot for too long, her eyes would start to get sore, so every once in a while she looked up at the people walking up and down the street.

She noticed that no one paid any attention to her. Some of the people who went by would glance in her direction, but only a very few of them gave her a second look. This made Xu Yulan feel much better, and she told Xu Sanguan, “When I stand on the street, I’m just like a telephone pole for all anyone cares.”

She said, “Xu Sanguan, I’m not afraid of anything anymore. I’ve suffered everything now. There’s nothing else they can do to me. It’s already come to this. What more could they do to me? Kill me? Fine, I’m really not afraid of dying. But sometimes I think about you, I think about the kids, and I start to feel frightened. If it wasn’t for you and the kids, I really wouldn’t be afraid of anything.”

The thought of her three sons brought tears to her eyes.

“Yile and Erle ignore me. They won’t even talk to me anymore. When I call to them, they pretend not to hear me. Sanle’s the only one who still talks to me, who still dares to call me his mom. I’m out there every day suffering, and when I get home, you’re the only one who’s good to me. When my feet are swollen, you pour a basin of hot water for me to soak them in. When I come home late, you’ve kept some dinner under the quilt because you were afraid it would get cold. When I’m standing out there on the street, you’re the one who brings me things to eat and water to drink. Xu Sanguan, as long as you’re good to me, I’m not afraid of anything in the world.”

Xu Yulan usually had to stand out in the street all day long, so Xu Sanguan would bring her something to eat and water to drink. At first Xu Sanguan wanted Yile to go, but Yile refused. “Dad, why don’t you tell Erle to do it?”

Xu Sanguan called for Erle and told him, “Erle, we’ve all eaten, but your mom hasn’t had anything yet. Why don’t you take her something to eat?”

Erle shook his head. “Dad, why don’t you have Sanle do it?”

Xu Sanguan got angry. He said, “I ask Yile to do it, and he passes the job on to Erle. I ask Erle to do it, and he passes the job to Sanle. And Sanle, the little brat, just puts the bowl down on the ground and disappears without a trace. When they want to eat, when they want clothes on their backs, when they want some money, they’re my sons all right. But when it comes to taking their mom something to eat, it seems like I don’t have any sons anymore.”

Erle said to Xu Sanguan, “Dad, I don’t want to go outside anymore. Whenever I go out, people who know who we are call me Two Yuan a Night. It’s so embarrassing.”

Yile said, “I’m not afraid of them calling me Two Yuan a Night. If they call me names, I just call them names right back and even louder than they did. And I’m not afraid of fighting either. If there are more of them than me, I’ll just run. I’ll head home and get a knife and run back and show them and say I’m a merciless killer and if they don’t believe me, they can go ask Blacksmith Fang’s son. Then it’s their turn to run. It’s not that I’m afraid of going out. I just don’t feel like going out, that’s all.”

Xu Sanguan said, “I’m the one who should be afraid to go out. Whenever I go out, people throw little rocks at me, and spit at me, and other people want me to stop and publicly denounce your mom. If they did that to you kids, you could just pretend you didn’t know or understand, but I’m too afraid of what will happen if I refuse to say anything. It’s just as bad for me, if not worse. What are you kids afraid of? You kids were born into the new society, and you’ve grown up under the red flag. You’re innocent. Look at Sanle. Isn’t that little brat out all day long, playing in the streets? Though he’s taken it a little too far today. It’s getting late, and he still hasn’t come home.”

When Sanle came home, Xu Sanguan called him over for a talk.

“Where did you go? You left right after breakfast and haven’t been home all day. Where were you? Who were you playing with?”

Sanle said, “I don’t remember anymore. I went so many places that I can’t remember. And I wasn’t playing with anyone else, just by myself.”

Sanle was willing to deliver the food to his mom, but Xu Sanguan worried that he was still too small for the responsibility. He had no choice but to bring her the food himself. He packed the rice in a little aluminum lunchbox and walked out into the street.

He could see Xu Yulan standing on the stool in the distance, head bowed, with the placard hanging from her neck. Her hair had started to grow out a little, and she looked like a little boy from a distance. Xu Yulan’s clothes were in tatters, and her back was curved like the question marks that filled the big-character posters. Her hands hung limply in front of her, and because she kept her head at about the same height as her bent upper back, they dangled level with her knees.

Xu Sanguan, seeing the sorry state she was in, felt wave after wave of sorrow roll through him as he approached. When he arrived by her side, he said, “I’m here.”

Xu Yulan’s bowed head turned to look at Xu Sanguan, who showed her the little aluminum lunchbox.

“I’ve brought you some food.”

Xu Yulan stepped down, sat on the stool, adjusted the placard, and took the aluminum lunchbox. She lifted the cover and set the lunchbox down on the stool beside her. When she saw that all there was in the box was rice, without even a little vegetables or meat, she said nothing, merely picking up the spoon and starting to eat. She stared at her feet as she chewed on the rice.

Xu Sanguan stood by her side, watching her silently eat her meal. After a moment he lifted his head to look at the people walking up and down the street.

A few people, noticing Xu Yulan sitting on the stool and eating, walked up to her, glanced inside the lunchbox, and asked Xu Sanguan, “What did you bring her to eat?”

Xu Sanguan hastily took the lunchbox from Xu Yulan’s hand and showed it to them, saying, “Have a look. All there is is this rice. No meat or vegetables. You can see for yourself. I’m not giving her anything but rice.”

They nodded. “That’s right. Nothing in there but rice.”

One of them asked, “Why don’t you put something else in there? Plain rice is pretty tasteless without any vegetables or meat.”

Xu Sanguan said, “I can’t give her anything good to eat. If I gave her something good to eat”—he pointed in Xu Yulan’s direction—“I’d be ‘shielding the enemy.’ When I make her eat plain rice without any extras, it’s so I can ‘struggle’ against her too.”

As Xu Sanguan spoke, Xu Yulan kept her head bowed to the ground, not even daring to chew on the rice she had in her mouth. It wasn’t until they had moved into the distance that Xu Yulan began to chew again.

When Xu Sanguan saw that there was no one in the vicinity, he whispered to her, “I hid the good stuff under the rice. No one’s looking now. Have a bite.”

Xu Yulan dug through the rice with a spoon and saw that the bottom of the lunchbox was full of meat. Xu Sanguan had cooked her red-braised pork. She picked up a piece of the pork with her spoon, popped it into her mouth, bowed her head, and continued to chew.

Xu Sanguan whispered, “I made it for you in secret. Even the kids don’t know.”

Xu Yulan nodded, ate a few more spoonfuls of rice, and then put the cover back on the lunchbox. She told Xu Sanguan, “I don’t want any more.”

Xu Sanguan said, “You only had one piece of meat. Eat the rest of your meat.”

Xu Yulan shook her head. “Give it to Yile and the rest of them. Bring it home and let Yile and the rest eat it.” Then she stretched out a hand and pounded her legs with her fist. “My legs are numb from standing so much.”

The way she looked brought the beginnings of tears to Xu Sanguan’s eyes. He said to her, “There’s an old saying that still rings true. The more you see, the more you learn about the world. I think I must have aged ten years in the last few months. It’s true that ‘you can know a man’s face but not his heart.’ We still don’t know who’s responsible for that poster. Who knows? You usually don’t mince words, so you might have offended any number of people. From now on, you better be more careful. The ancients said that the more you say, the more you lose.”

These words struck a chord in Xu Yulan. She burst out, “There was just that one time with He Xiaoyong, and now look at the state I’m in. You and Lin Fenfang did the same thing, but no one’s ever bothered to ‘struggle’ against you.”

Xu Yulan’s words terrified Xu Sanguan. He looked hastily around to see if anyone was nearby, and when he was certain it was safe, he whispered, “You just can’t say things like that. Don’t ever say that to anyone else.”

Xu Yulan said, “I won’t say it again.”

Xu Sanguan said, “You’re already in hot water, and I’m the only one in the world who’s trying to save you. If I got thrown in the water along with you, there’d be no one left to pull you out.”

AROUND NOON Xu Sanguan usually emerged from the house with the aluminum lunchbox in hand. People who were familiar with him knew that he was on his way to deliver Xu Yulan her lunch, and they would always call out, “Xu Sanguan, making a delivery, eh?”

But one day a stranger stopped him on his way to Xu Yulan’s spot and asked, “Aren’t you Xu Sanguan? Is that the food you’re bringing over to that woman named Xu Yulan? Let me ask you this. Have you held a struggle session at home? I mean to denounce Xu Yulan?”

Xu Sanguan held the aluminum lunchbox tightly to his chest, lowered his eyes to the ground, and nodded. “She’s already been denounced all over town.” Then he counted all the places she’d been struggled against on his fingers. “They denounced her at the factory, and at the school, and on the street, and she’s been through five struggle sessions at the town square.”

The man said, “She has to be struggled against at home too.”

Xu Sanguan didn’t know this man, and he wasn’t wearing a red armband either. It was impossible to tell who he was or where he came from. Even so he had little choice but to listen and pay heed to what the man had said.

He said to Xu Yulan, “People are watching us, you know. Someone asked me today if we’d had a struggle session at home yet. He said we have to denounce you at home as well.”

Xu Yulan had only just come home from the street. She lifted the “Xu Yulan, Prostitute” placard from around her neck and set it down on the floor behind the door. Then she replaced the stool she had stood on all day beside the table, picked up a rag, and started wiping the seat. She continued to wipe the stool without a glance in his direction as she listened, and when he was finished, she said, “Go ahead then.”

That evening Xu Sanguan called to Yile, Erle, and Sanle and said, “Tonight our family’s holding a struggle session. And who are we denouncing? Xu Yulan, of course. From now on you have to call her Xu Yulan. You’re not allowed to call her Mom at a struggle session. You can’t call her Mom until we’re finished with the meeting.”

Xu Sanguan had his three sons sit down in a row. He sat in front of them, and Xu Yulan stood to one side, although he had set out a stool for her too. The four of them sat on stools, while only Xu Yulan remained standing, head bowed, just as if she were still out on the street.

Xu Sanguan said to his sons, “Today we’re denouncing Xu Yulan, so she really ought to remain standing. But since she’s been standing all day on the street and her feet are swollen and her legs are numb, do you think we can let her sit down on a stool instead? All in favor raise your hands.”

As he proposed the motion, Xu Sanguan raised his own hand. Sanle rapidly followed suit, while Yile and Erle exchanged glances before raising their hands.

Xu Sanguan said to Xu Yulan, “You may sit down.”

Xu Yulan sat down on the stool.

Xu Sanguan said to his sons, “Each of you has to speak out. If you have something to say, don’t hold back. If you don’t have anything to say, keep it brief. But everyone has to say something so that if anyone asks, I can tell them in all honesty that everyone spoke at the meeting. Yile, you go first.”

Yile turned and looked at Erle. “Erle, you go first.”

Erle glanced at Xu Yulan, gazed toward Xu Sanguan, and finally looked over at Sanle. “Let Sanle go first.”

Sanle’s mouth dropped open, as if he were about to laugh but had thought better of it. He said to Xu Sanguan, “I don’t know what to say.”

Xu Sanguan looked at Sanle and said, “Well, I guess you wouldn’t have had much to say anyway.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll start with a few words then. They say that Xu Yulan is a prostitute. They say she sees clients every night, that she charges two yuan a night. But I want you all to think about that. Who exactly is it that sleeps in the same bed with Xu Yulan every night?”

When he finished speaking, Xu Sanguan looked questioningly over at Yile, Erle, and Sanle. His three sons gazed silently back toward him.

Finally, Sanle broke the silence. “It’s you! You sleep in the same bed as Mom every night.”

“That’s exactly right,” Xu Sanguan said. “It’s me. Every one of Xu Yulan’s johns is me. But can you really call me a john?”

Xu Sanguan saw Sanle nod his head. Then he watched as Erle also nodded in agreement. Only Yile refrained from nodding.

Xu Sanguan pointed at Erle and Sanle and said, “Did I tell you two to nod? I wanted you to shake your heads. You idiots! You really think I’m her john? When I married Xu Yulan, I spent a lot of money on the wedding. I hired six men to play drums and gongs, and four men to carry the sedan chair. I had a three-table spread, and all the friends and relatives I could think of showed up at the party to eat and drink their fill. Everything about our marriage was on the up-and-up. That’s why I’m not a john and she’s not a whore. Though I should add that Xu Yulan did make one big mistake, and that mistake was He Xiaoyong.” He glanced at Yile and continued, “You know all about Xu Yulan and He Xiaoyong’s affair. That’s what we’re going to denounce at today’s meeting.”

Xu Sanguan turned to face Xu Yulan. “Xu Yulan, it’s time for you to come clean to your sons about the affair.”

Xu Yulan bowed her head and whispered, “How can I tell my sons about that? How could I even begin to talk about that with them?”

Xu Sanguan said, “Don’t look at them as your sons. Just try to see them as the revolutionary masses who are denouncing you.”

Xu Yulan looked up at her three sons. Yile sat with his head bowed. Only Erle and Sanle were looking at her. She swiveled her eyes back toward Xu Sanguan, who said, “Go on.”

“I committed some crimes in my past life.” Xu Yulan wiped her tears. “And I’m paying for it in this life. I must have offended He Xiaoyong in my past life, and he took his revenge on me in this one. He’s dead and gone now, but I’m still paying.”

Xu Sanguan said, “Enough of that.”

Xu Yulan nodded, and lifted up both of her hands to wipe her face. “Actually, He Xiaoyong and I only did it once. I never thought that after just one time I would end up pregnant with Yile—”

Yile interrupted, “Don’t talk about me. If you’re going to confess, then speak for yourself.”

Xu Yulan looked up at Yile, who was sitting ashen-faced across from her and avoiding her gaze. Her tears flowed once more as she continued. “I know I should apologize to you all. I know you all hate me. You’ve lost a lot of face because of me. But you can’t blame me either. It was He Xiaoyong. He Xiaoyong took advantage of my dad leaving us alone when he went to the public toilet. He pushed me up against the wall. I tried to push him away. I told him I already belonged to Xu Sanguan. But he kept pressing me up against the wall. I tried my best to push him away, but he was stronger than me. I couldn’t get him off me. I wanted to scream, but he squeezed my breasts and somehow I couldn’t fight anymore. I just went limp.”

Xu Sanguan saw Erle’s and Sanle’s eyes open wide with wonder. Yile kept his eyes to the floor, but his feet were sliding agitatedly back and forth across the floor.

Xu Yulan continued her story. “He dragged me to the bed, unbuttoned my shirt, unbuttoned my pants. I didn’t have any strength left to resist him. He pulled one of my legs out of my pants leg, but didn’t bother with the other one. Then he pushed his own pants down below his backside.”

Xu Sanguan shouted, “Stop! Enough! Can’t you see that Erle’s and Sanle’s eyes are just about ready to pop out of their heads? You’re spewing venom. You’re corrupting the younger generation.”

Xu Yulan said, “You made me do it.”

Xu Sanguan said, “I didn’t tell you to talk about that stuff.” He pointed toward Xu Yulan and shouted at Erle and Sanle, “This is your own mom! How could you have sat there listening to that stuff?”

Erle shook his head vigorously. “I didn’t hear anything. Sanle was listening to it, not me.”

Sanle said, “I didn’t hear anything either.”

“Forget it,” Xu Sanguan said. “Xu Yulan’s confessed more than enough. I think it’s your turn to say something. Yile, you go first.”

Only now did Yile lift his eyes from the floor and say to Xu Sanguan, “I don’t have anything else to say. I hate He Xiaoyong the very most. And I hate her second most.” He pointed at Xu Yulan. “I hate He Xiaoyong because he wouldn’t recognize me as his son. And I hate her because I can’t hold up my head in public.”

Xu Sanguan signaled for him to stop talking. Then he looked over at Erle. “Erle, it’s your turn.”

Erle scratched his head with his hand and said to Xu Yulan, “Why didn’t you bite him when he pushed you up against the wall? If you couldn’t push him away, how come you didn’t bite him? You say you didn’t have any strength left to resist, but you must have had enough strength to bite him—”

“Erle!” Xu Sanguan shouted, so frightening the boy that he began to tremble. He gestured at him. “I thought you just said you didn’t hear any of that stuff. If you didn’t hear anything, then what the hell do you think you’re talking about? If you didn’t hear anything, then don’t say anything either. Sanle, say something.”

Sanle glanced at Erle, who was staring uneasily at Xu Sanguan, still flinching from the shock of being scolded by his father. Then Sanle glanced at Xu Sanguan, whose face was flushed with anger. By this time Sanle was so frightened, he didn’t dare say a word. Instead, he sat with his mouth half open, lips poised to speak.

Xu Sanguan dismissed him with a wave of his hand. “Forget it. Don’t say anything then. ‘A dog’s mouth doesn’t produce ivory’ after all. Today’s struggle session is adjourned.”

Yile said, “But I wasn’t finished talking yet.”

Xu Sanguan looked disapprovingly at Yile. “What else do you have to say?”

Yile said, “I had only got up to the part about who I hated. You didn’t let me talk about who I love. The person I love most, of course, is our Great Leader Chairman Mao. And the one I love second most”—Yile gazed at Xu Sanguan—“is you.”

Xu Sanguan stared back at Yile without so much as blinking. After what seemed like a long while, tears spilled from his eyes, and he said to Xu Yulan, “Who says Yile isn’t my son?”

Xu Sanguan raised his right hand to his eyes to wipe away the tears. After he had been wiping for a moment, he raised his left hand to his eyes as well and continued to rub away his tears.

Finally, he gazed benevolently at his three sons. “I’ve also made a serious mistake in my life. It was with Lin Fenfang. You know, Fatty Lin.”

Xu Yulan said, “Xu Sanguan, why are you bringing that up?”

“Because I want to tell them.” Xu Sanguan gestured in Xu Yulan’s direction. “It was like this. Fatty Lin broke her leg so I went to visit her. Her husband wasn’t home, and so we were alone in the house. I asked her which leg was broken. She said it was the right one. I asked her if it hurt. First I touched her calf, and then I touched her thigh, and then I touched her even higher up—”

“Xu Sanguan.” Xu Yulan said his name. “You have to stop right there. If you keep on going, you’ll poison their minds.”

Xu Sanguan nodded and looked at his three sons. All three of the boys had their eyes glued to the floor. He continued. “I did it just one time with Lin Fenfang. And your mom did it just once with He Xiaoyong. The reason I told you all of this tonight is because I want you boys to know that I’m actually just as bad as your mom. Both of us made serious mistakes. That’s why you shouldn’t hate her for it.” He pointed toward Xu Yulan. “If you hate her, you have to hate me too, because she and I are birds of a feather.”

Xu Yulan shook her head and said to her sons, “He’s not the same as me. He only did it with Lin Fenfang because I hurt his feelings first.”

Xu Sanguan, shaking his head, said, “It’s all the same, really.”

Xu Yulan addressed Xu Sanguan. “We’re not the same. If the incident with He Xiaoyong had never happened, you never would have touched Lin Fenfang.”

Xu Sanguan couldn’t help but agree. “Well, that’s true. But,” he added, “we’re still the same.”

LATER Chairman Mao began to talk. Chairman Mao was saying things nearly every day. When he said, “We must fight with words and not weapons,” everyone put down the knives and clubs in their hands. When Chairman Mao went on to say, “We must take the revolution back to the classroom,” Yile, Erle, and Sanle put on their book bags and went back to school, where classes had resumed. When Chairman Mao said, “We must make the revolution serve production,” Xu Sanguan went back to work at the silk factory, and Xu Yulan got up every morning to fry dough. Xu Yulan’s hair was getting longer and longer, almost long enough to cover her ears.

Sometime after that Chairman Mao stood atop the rostrum at Tiananmen, held up his right hand, and waved toward the west, addressing millions and millions of students assembled on the square: “It’s necessary that educated youth be removed to the countryside to be reeducated by middle and lower peasants.”

So it was that Yile, carrying a bed mat, a Thermos, and a washbasin, marched at the back of a column of students, all of whom were just as young as he. They marched under a red flag, singing anthems, happily climbing onto buses, happily boarding ferries, waving good-bye to the tears of their mothers and fathers on their way to their new homes in the countryside.

After Yile was sent down to the countryside, he would often sit all alone on a hillside as dusk approached, wrapping his arms around his knees and staring blankly at the fields all around him. When the other students who had been sent down saw him sitting there, they would ask, “Yile, what are you doing?”

Yile would say, “I’m thinking about my mom and dad.”

When this story about Yile made its way back to town, Xu Sanguan and Xu Yulan both cried.

By that time Erle had also graduated from school. Soon he too would move away, carrying only a bed mat, a Thermos, and a washbasin, as he and yet another column of students marched under the red flag on their way to their new homes in the countryside.

Xu Yulan said to Erle before he left, “Erle, when you get to the countryside and things get really rough, just climb up a hill and think about your mom and dad, and remember us.”

One day Chairman Mao sat on the sofa in his study and said, “You may keep one child by your side.” And so it was that Sanle stayed by his parents’ side, graduated from high school at age eighteen, and started work at the machine tools factory in town.