Darkest Mercy

Chapter 22

Keenan stood in the study and watched Donia walk into the room with a mixture of joy and fear. Neither was evident in his expression, but the combination of the two made him momentarily speechless.

“Donia,” Aislinn greeted the Winter Queen from the sofa where she sat.

The Winter Queen pursed her lips as she looked at the two of them. “If I had any other regent to visit, I would.”

“Has something happened to Niall?” Keenan asked.

“Yes. Maybe. . . . I’m not sure.” Donia folded her arms. “Gabriel visited me. He wasn’t able to tell me anything overt, and my requests for an audience with Niall were denied. The guards turned me away at the door.” A troubled look came over her face. “So I went to the gate to Faerie, but that was inaccessible as well. The gate to Faerie is closed. Now I am here.”

With a self-confidence that befit her position, Aislinn gestured at the sofa across from her. “Please, sit.”

“The gate is closed?” Keenan echoed.

“I couldn’t even find it.” Donia looked directly at him as she added, “And Niall is locked away in his house.”

Despite the worry writ plain on her face, Donia was regal as she walked over to the sofa. The Winter Queen sat opposite the Summer Queen. Whether it was intentional or not, the two queens had made it so that he had to sit next to the faery who shared his court or the faery who owned his heart. What I want and what I can have in life are not ever the same. Keenan took his position next to his queen. Duty first.

“Tavish has had reports that Irial was injured in the fight with Bananach,” Aislinn said.

The surge of shock he felt wasn’t masked quickly enough. Donia’s gaze narrowed as she realized that he had been unaware of this news until that instant.

My queen has become used to ruling without me. He gave Donia a wry smile, but neither of them commented. That’s what I get for leaving.

“I have reason to believe that Irial’s injury is a fatal one,” Donia added. “Perhaps Niall is mourning.”

“Maybe . . . Seth went straight from the fight with Bananach to Faerie. He returned here yesterday, to see me.” Aislinn tensed slightly, but did not look at Keenan as she added, “He had to leave suddenly, but he didn’t mention anything about Irial’s injury when he was here . . . or about Faerie being closed.”

“And where is Seth now?” Donia prompted. “Did he return to Faerie?”

“He didn’t say where he went, just that it was something he had to do immediately,” Aislinn told them.

Keenan did look at Aislinn as he said, “When I left him, he said he was going to see Niall.”

His queen scowled at him, but said nothing.

“And neither of you thought to tell the other one these details?” Donia asked incredulously. “What were you doing?”

“The day had just begun, and we were dancing,” Aislinn said.

“Dancing?” Donia looked at the Summer Queen with the same disdain Keenan had once seen on her face when she looked at the Summer Girls. “Of course you were. Bananach is attacking faeries, stealing from our courts. Irial is injured. Faerie is closed. Yes, dancing is precisely what will help.”

Before Keenan could speak, Aislinn said, “Your court is not ours. Snowy calm may be what you need, but summer is joyous. They require rejoicing to stay strong. Maybe you should try it.”

“Not all of us have reasons to rejoice,” Donia bit off.

Aislinn’s skin sizzled. “Then maybe you ought to find one.”

“Perhaps I should.” Donia smiled a sad smile, and then took a deep breath. “When I went to the veil to enter Faerie, it was gone. While we searched, Far Dorcha approached me.”

“I met him as well . . . after I left you.” Aislinn walked to the counter and grabbed her cell phone.

Keenan looked from one queen to the other. “You both met the head of the death-fey?”

“It had to have been there yesterday. Faerie, I mean,” Aislinn said absently as she dialed and raised the phone to her ear.

While she waited for Seth to answer, Keenan told Donia, “Seth stood beside me yesterday when Bananach attacked me.”

“After he left here.” Aislinn clutched the phone, but she spoke to them: “He came from Faerie to the loft, and then left here to . . . help Keenan.”

The question in Donia’s eyes wasn’t one Keenan was sure he should answer. He had spent decades keeping secrets from her because of the search for the missing queen.

I don’t want secrets between us anymore . . . but she is not a part of my court.

They sat silently, looking at each other while Aislinn texted Seth.

“I’ll go see if Tavish has any new information.” Aislinn glanced at the phone again, and then she looked from Keenan to Donia—and left.

Once the Summer Queen was gone, Donia stood and walked to the window. Her arms were folded tightly over her chest, and her gaze was fixedly not on him.

“Don?”

She glanced at him and then quickly looked back at the window. “Please, Keenan, not right now.”

“Can I do anything?” He didn’t move from his spot on the sofa. “Would you rather I left the room? Maybe you and Aislinn can talk and I could . . . wait somewhere?”

She turned to face him and smiled wanly. “I am worried for Niall. I am worried for all of us. I haven’t lost many of mine to Bananach, but almost a dozen of my fey are missing. I suspect they are with her . . . or dead . . . or running away.”

“Ours as well,” Keenan said. “Tavish mentioned that a full score of ours have vanished. I have no idea what has happened in the Dark Court.”

The Winter Queen relaxed a little, so that her hands were not clutching her arms so tightly. “He loves Niall, you know. Irial.”

“He hurt Niall. I’ve seen Niall fall apart time after time when Irial was in town. It destroyed him. The scars on his back and chest . . .” Keenan remembered the first time he’d seen the webs of scars that covered much of Niall’s torso. He’d been young, too foolish to know not to ask, but he’d regretted it the moment after he’d spoken the question. The look of pain on Niall’s face was one he’d not forgotten nine centuries later.

“Irial has been living there. If he dies, Niall won’t deal well. You know him.” Donia shivered. “He doesn’t forgive easily.”

“I am well aware of that, Don,” Keenan muttered.

Donia relaxed enough to sit on the arm of the chair farthest away from him. It wasn’t unusual for her to be so far away. They’d had more time of tentative distance than trust, but the memory of holding her in his arms made the renewed distance hurt like it had when she’d failed the test.

I want to tell you I can change. I want to tell you we can run away and abandon everything. He watched her in silence for several moments. Every promise he should be able to make was forbidden to them. No gift, no word, nothing would undo all of his failures. I want to be the faery you saw when you met me. I want you to see me that way again. Even if they couldn’t be together as he had dreamed, he wanted her to look at him like she had so many times, to see him instead of the Summer King.

“I could talk to him, to Niall,” Keenan blurted. “If you think it would help, I can try.”

She startled. “The last time you saw him, he knocked you unconscious.”

“That wasn’t the last time.” Keenan flushed. “He was trained in the Dark Court. It’s not like it was just anyone who punched me.”

“I wasn’t judging. Merely reminding.”

“Perhaps rejoicing a little that I was knocked down?” he asked.

“No,” she sighed. “Even when you infuriate me or break my heart, I don’t rejoice in your pain. Would you relish my pain?”

“Never,” he swore.

Aislinn came back into the room. She stayed in the opposite doorway, placing herself at the far end of the room from Donia. “Tavish has heard nothing about Faerie. He has our people looking into it, and he’d”—she gave them a small smile—“‘very much appreciate it if the regents had the sense to stay here until such time as we have more data,’ as he says.”

“You don’t need to stay that far away, Ash. I won’t injure you just because he’s back.”

The Summer Queen grinned. “Nor I you, Donia.”

The two queens smiled at each other, and Keenan couldn’t help but think—again—that they’d both be happier if he was gone. Awkwardly, he looked from one to the other. “I need to talk to the rowan. Make sure that everyone is safe and accounted for.” He stood and glanced at Donia. “If you leave before I’m back, I would ask that you summon your guard or take some of ours to see you home.”

The Winter Queen smiled, not cruelly, but with an unpleasantly familiar reserve. “I am not your concern, Keenan.”

“You will always be my concern, Donia.” Keenan bowed to her before he could see her reaction to his words and walked away.

At the doorway, Aislinn squeezed his hand briefly, but said nothing.