Dead on Arrival

24

The First Amendment of the Constitution may dictate a separation between Church and State but the fact is, when preachers preach, their congregations listen to what they have to say and tend to vote and contribute accordingly. So when Mahoney got a call from a preacher he too listened, and the preacher he was currently listening to was none other than Cardinal Patrick Mackey, head of the archdiocese of Boston.

Cardinal Mackey had called to discuss a bill in the House having to do with health insurance. As the Catholic Church had its fingers in a number of hospitals in the Boston area, and as the bill might affect the profitability of those hospitals, Cardinal Mackey wanted to make sure that the speaker understood the cardinal’s perspective on the matter. Mackey, of course, being a man of the cloth, believed in treating the sick and giving alms to the poor; he just thought such acts of charity should come through private donations and not through enterprises that funded the Church’s many other endeavors. Mahoney thanked the good cardinal for his input and concluded the call by saying that a man named DeMarco would soon be visiting the fair city of Boston. Cardinal Mackey knew exactly what Congressman Mahoney meant and said he’d say a special mass for his favorite politician.

Mahoney picked up the phone to call his chief of staff and discuss the cardinal’s concern. His chief, a diabolical genius named Perry Wallace, would help him decide if they should do what the cardinal wanted and, if not, how they would make it appear that it wasn’t Mahoney’s fault that the cardinal hadn’t gotten his way. But before Mahoney could punch the button on his phone to summon Wallace, Wallace walked into the room.

There are two types of fat men. There are those who carry their added poundage well, men whose girth gives them an imposing stature and creates an impression of bull-like robustness. Mahoney was one of those men. Wallace was the other type of fat man. He just looked fat, his stomach flopping over his belt, his face bloated into a small white moon.

Before Mahoney could tell Wallace about the cardinal’s phone call, Wallace said, ‘Broderick’s bill just passed in the Senate.’

‘Shit,’ Mahoney said.

‘Eighteen of our guys voted for it.’

‘Goddammit,’ Mahoney said.

Now Broderick’s bill would come to the House — Mahoney’s House.