Death Blow

5

Nancy Dobler sat in her Coronado apartment in the robe she had pulled on quickly that morning. She had overslept, and fourteen-year-old Helen had to wake her. Helen was ready for school, but eleven-year old Charles wasn’t. She hustled him and got them both off to school on time with lunches.

“Mom, do I have to carry a brown paper sack lunch? All the kids I know buy their lunch at the cafeteria. It’s just not cool to take a sack to school.”

“Cool or not, you do it. We aren’t made of money, child. Your dad is Navy, right, and we scrimp and save where we can.”

“Yeah, like that model power boat Dad bought. Wasn’t that something like a hundred and fifty dollars?”

“Hush up, young lady. Your father gets little time enough for his own enjoyment.”

They were gone then, and Nancy had regretted some of the things she said. But if the money just wasn’t there…

She ran to the bathroom and lifted a full bottle of whisky from inside the toilet tank where she had hidden it. Just a short one. Just one to get through the day. Hell, it was going to be another long one, and then Will wouldn’t be there at night. She missed him.

The one drink turned into four; and when Nancy checked the clock through fuzzy eyes, she figured it was somewhere around eleven o’clock. She knew she should get dressed.

“Dressed for fucking who?” she asked out loud. It seemed funny coming that way and she said it again. This time she shrilled with laughter. She turned on the TV in the living room and had another half a glass of the straight stuff and sipped at it. Before she knew it the glass was empty.

“Hell, must have spilled it,” she said and giggled. For a minute she felt like she was going to throw up, but she didn’t and lay on the sofa. The whisky bottle tipped and half of it ran out onto the fabric and soaked in. When she saw it she whooped.

“Oh, damn and God damn, I done it this time.” She stared at the stain, stood the bottle on the floor and whooped in delight ending in a raucous laugh. “Fuck, I’ll just send the thing out to get cleaned.” It seemed uproariously funny and she said it again. Then she bent over and vomited on the living room carpet.

“Shit.”

The doorbell rang. Nancy squinted dark eyes and tried to focus on the front door. She couldn’t. When she tried to stand up, she fell down. “Oh damn.”

She heard the door open.

“No, no, don’t come in.” she shouted, but the words were slurred and she wasn’t sure that she heard what she thought she said.

“Oh, fuck, company.”

Maria Fernandez had found the door unlocked and pushed it open just a little. She looked in and called.

“Hey, Nancy, anybody home? You missed our lunch. Thought you might be gone or something.”

Maria headed into the living room with Milly right behind her.

Nancy tried to sit up where she had fallen on the floor, but after getting halfway up, she fell again, this time with her face in the pool of vomit soaking into the floor.

“Oh, shit,” Nancy said. “Don’t come in. I ain’t dressed for polite company.”

That’s what Nancy thought she said. It came out a series of sounds and half words and other words slurred together.

“Work time,” Maria said, peeling out of the light blazer she had worn. She put it on the back of the couch and lifted Nancy up so she could lean against the couch. “Washcloth and towel and some clothes,” Maria said.

Milly hurried to the bathroom and brought back a warm, wet washcloth and a towel. She vanished into the bedroom and came back with a blouse and a pair of matching pants.

It took them twenty minutes to get Nancy on the couch, washed up, and into her clothes. Milly cleaned the rug, dumped the rest of the whisky out in the sink, and trashed the bottle. She put on some strong coffee and let it perk.

As they watched, Nancy slumped over and either passed out or fell asleep on the couch. Maria covered her with a light blanket and put a pillow under her head.

“We’re a day too late,” Maria said. “The men have been gone only a week. It may be a long trip for them. I had an e-mail from Miguel last night. He said they were on a carrier in the East China Sea below Japan waiting to see what happens. Evidently, they are worried about China.”

“I’ll take the kids to my place,” Milly said. “I live closer to the school than you do. That way I can still get to work. You get Nancy at your place. Do you have room?”

“Plenty. I’ll just put Linda on the couch. Now, when she wakes up, how do we convince her to split up her family?”

“No idea, but we have to try. She hasn’t gone off this way since that last suicide try and her stay at the hospital. Here the men have been gone only a week. It could be a long deployment for the home folks.”

Maria frowned and began cleaning up the house. It wasn’t that bad but did show signs of neglect.

“Milly, you get back to work. I’ll handle the negotiations. Come back over here… no call me when you get off work. I should have Nancy convinced to come to my place by then. You missed enough work as it is.”

“Sure you’ll be okay?”

“Oh yes, I had a father who tried this same routine about twice a year. I know the drill.”

When Nancy woke up three hours later, the house was clean, the kitchen spotless, the dishes done, and a load of wash in the dryer.

“Oh, God did I fuck up.” Nancy moaned the words. “Headache.” Maria brought her three ibuprofen and a glass of water.

“Just a small drink to get me back in the water?” Nancy asked. She shook her head when Maria did. She sat up on the couch and grabbed her head. “Oh, damn, I tell myself never again.” She blinked and looked at the room. “You cleaned up after me. I owe you, big time.”

Nancy started to stand, then sank back on the couch. “Hear when the guys are coming home?”

“Nothing yet,” Maria said. “They’ve only been gone a week.”

“Hell, I know that,” Nancy shouted, then stopped and tears burst out and she cried. Maria sat beside her, put her arm around her, and held her tightly.

“It’s all right, Nancy. We all go through these spells. Just let us help you get over this one. I want you to stay at my place tonight. The kids can stay with Milly.”

“No. We all stay here together. A family. We’re a God-damned family, and we stay that way.” The words came out angry, flat, and cruel, intending to leave no doubt.

“Nancy, I know about drinking. My father. I know you could use some help right now. I want to help. I don’t want to be pushy or get in your face, but come on, don’t you think you could use some support about now?”

“Hell yes, and fuck no.” Nancy’s eyes were steel balls inside a steel shell. “I know exactly what I am and that sometimes it takes over and I can’t stop it. Hell yes, I know that. Damn right I have to fight it. But it’s my fight. If I can’t win it, then I don’t deserve the great family I have. Have you looked at Helen lately? What a gem, what a wonderful young lady. Going to be fifteen in a month. A beauty, a real beauty and I don’t know where she got it. Glistening dark hair, eyes you can drown in, and a smile that lights up the whole damn countryside. And Charlie, he’s a go-getter. Already he knows twenty times as much about computers as Will or I do. He spends some time with them, but he’s working on programming, not watching porno channels. Sure I know what I have here. Damn right I’m fighting to keep it.”

Later, Maria came in the living room and shook her head. She had made a search in the usual hiding spots but couldn’t find a single bottle of booze. It was here, she just hadn’t found it.

“I’ve got to get back home before the kids come home, Nancy,” Maria said. “Be all right if I stop by on my way home? Tell you what. You invite me to dinner tonight, and I’ll have you and the kids to my place for barbecue tomorrow night, deal?”

Nancy looked at her a long time. “Mean me cook dinner for us and you?”

“Sure. You’re a good cook. I’ve had a taste of your work before, remember?”

“Yeah.” She almost threw up both hands. “Okay,” the emphasis was on the last part of the word showing her absolute frustration.

“Good. I’ll call you later. See you about six thirty.” Maria turned but she wasn’t ready to leave yet.

Maria fussed around the living room, straightening curtains and pictures, picking up things in the wrong places.

Nancy stood and put her fists on her hips. “Maria, you are a good person and trying to help, but you have no fucking idea the kind of hell I’ve been going through. Yes, I worry myself sick about Will. He’s almost thirty-eight years old. How do they expect him to keep up with those muscle-bound twenty-two-year-olds? In the SEALs if you don’t keep up, you can die. I know that damn well. Now they are out there somewhere, and people will be shooting at them, and they may get messed up in a real war, and then won’t that be just ducky.”

“That’s why I’m here, Nancy. We all worry about our men. There are three of us, that’s more than in most SEAL outfits. I worry every day Miguel is gone. I used to lose ten pounds when he was on a mission. I’m getting better, now I only lose five pounds. When I worry I don’t eat so well. All I’m saying is you’re not alone in this. Milly and I and Ardith are all around to help. Ardith isn’t here much, but when she is, she’s a good strong person.”

Nancy waved her arms in the air and paced around the room. She scowled at Maria and then did another round of the living room. When she stopped she turned to Maria. “Look, I’m sorry I get so bitchy. I know all this shit you’re talking. Know it by fucking heart. I also swear a lot when I’m frustrated and angry and feeling sorry for myself. Don’t pay it any attention.” Nancy flopped down on the couch. “Maybe I should just lay down and take something so I never wake up.”

“Sure, and leave the kids with all the problems that would cause? Do you think that Helen could suffer through that and not be traumatized for life?”

“Shit, oh damn. Never thought of that. Won’t do that to my Helen, to my baby.” Nancy threw one arm over her face and began to cry.

Maria stayed with Nancy until almost three, then hurried home to be there when the kids got out of school. She made it a point always to be there. The kids deserved it.

Just at 6:30, Maria rang the bell at the Fernandez apartment. Nobody came. She rang again. This time after a wait, someone came to the door and peered out through the glass. Then the door opened a crack.

Helen looked out. Maria saw the tear stains on her cheeks.

“Mom isn’t feeling well, and she said we should do dinner another day.”

“Your mother isn’t feeling well? Helen, are you sure? Let me talk to her.”

“No, no, Mom said you shouldn’t come in.”

“Helen, do you want some help? Did your mother find another bottle after we left?”

Helen didn’t answer. Tears came again, sliding down soft perfect cheeks. The sobs came a moment later. Maria edged the door inward and Helen let go of it. A moment later Helen fell into Maria’s arms.

“Helen, don’t worry. Your mom will be fine again. This is a sickness, drinking too much is a disease. You know about it. You have to remember that. There are ways to cure people and we’re going to try to help your mother get well again. We’re going to want you to help us.”

The sobbing stopped. Maria eased away from the young girl and lifted her chin. “Look, young lady. I’m going to need you to help me. Did your mother start anything cooking?”

“No.”

“Good. You go to the market at the end of the block and bring back four frozen dinners. Here’s some cash to cover it. And get something for desert. Ice cream maybe. Now run along, and I’ll take care of your mother.”

Nancy looked up and snorted when Maria came into the living room. She lay on the couch. The bottle she held was over half empty and the bowl of ice cubes had melted down to a lone survivor. A glass lay on its side on the coffee table.

“So Florence Nightingale, the Salvation Army lass has returned to save the drunken bitch from her own vomit… again, and again, and fucking again.”

“We’re having dinner, remember? Helen went to the market shopping and then we zap them in the microwave. Now before she gets back, how about a shower?”

“No shower.”

“Yes, shower. It will perk you up, dry you out a little and might even make you a little hungry. Come on. No objections. They are all overruled and countermanded and shot to hell. On your feet, girl, move it.”

The last two sentences had the snap of a top sergeant ordering around his Marines. Not exactly understanding why, Nancy sat up, then stood on shaky feet and caught Maria’s hand as they walked toward the bedroom and the shower.

The shower helped. Maria just being there helped. By the time the shower was over and Nancy dressed, Helen was back with the frozen dinners. Nancy had her choice from the four dinners. She took the barbecued steak strips.

Helen called Charlie out of the den. He carried a sheet of white paper with a short message on it.

“Got an e-mail from Dad,” Charlie said. Nancy grabbed it out of his hand and read it. She sat down and the edges of a smile touched her face, fought with the frown and won until the smile bathed her whole face.

“He’s back on an aircraft carrier somewhere south of Japan and the first mission is over and only one man got wounded and he’s recovering. He says they don’t know how long they will be on the carrier, but it’s like a mini-vacation. They’ll do a little training but not room to do much, and twenty-mile hikes are definitely out. He says he loves us and misses us and hopes they will be sent home soon.”

Nancy Dobler sat down at her place at the table and ate every scrap of the frozen dinner. Then she served the group desert, ice cream sundaes with three kinds of toppings, whipped cream, nuts, and a maraschino cherry.

Nancy smiled and almost glowed. “Hey kids, your dad is fine, he’s well, and he thinks they might be coming home soon. Isn’t that great!”