Declan

9

RACHEL ROLLED OVER IN BED, then pushed up on her elbow and shoved her hair out of her face. A persistent ringing had drawn her out of a deep sleep. As she looked around, she realized the sound was coming from Dec’s jeans, which were draped over the end of the bed.

Dec was lying beside her, his naked body sprawled across the mattress. She loved the way he slept, completely vulnerable, his body open to her touch. He was always so watchful when he was awake, but asleep, he let down his guard and she could get a sense of the man he’d be once he didn’t have to protect her anymore.

They’d been sleeping together like this for three nights now, discarding the last pretenses of propriety. They’d both accepted the fact they were sharing a very intense sexual relationship and in order to continue that, it was best if they shared a bed every night.

Sleeping in his arms, his long, lean body curled against hers, gave her a wonderful sense of security. And she liked having him there to touch and to kiss when her dreams woke her up. The nightmares had eased, but Rachel still had strange dreams, fitful images of danger that often made her wake up trembling.

But he was with her now and all she needed was to snuggle against his body to know that she was safe. She did that, throwing her arm around his waist and kissing his bicep.

Dec shifted, then opened his eyes and looked at her. A tiny smile curled the corners of his mouth and he groaned softly. “Morning.”

“Your cell phone was ringing,” she murmured.

He flopped back into the pillow and groaned again. “What time is it?”

“Close to nine,” she said.

“Why did we sleep so late?”

“Because we didn’t get to sleep until three in the morning,” Rachel said.

He grinned and gave her a satisfied chuckle. “Yeah, you’re right. I remember now. You were trying to convince me that your tongue was better for seduction than my hands. How did that work out? Who ended up being right?”

Rachel leaned forward and drew his nipple into her mouth, teasing at it with her tongue. “Me. You just have to admit that I know more about sex than you do.”

“Book knowledge,” he said. “I’m more of a hands-on kind of guy.”

“Just how many women have you slept with?” she asked.

“You really want to know?” he asked.

Rachel nodded. “I don’t think you’d be able to surprise me. And I probably could give it a good guess.”

“I’ll tell you,” he said. “Just one.”

“One?”

He nodded. “You. You’re the only one. The rest, they don’t count because it was never the way it is with you. That was just…gratification. This is incredible, crazy, intense sex. There’s a big difference.” He dropped a kiss on her lips. “So how many men have you slept with?”

“One,” she said with a playful smile.

“We’re damn near virgins then, aren’t we,” Dec said.

His phone rang again and Dec cursed softly. “I should get it,” he said.

“I’ll get it for you,” Rachel said. “I’m going to go make some coffee.” She crawled over top of him then found her robe and wrapped it around her naked body. On the way to the door, she grabbed his phone out of his jeans and tossed it over to him. “One of these days, you should probably go in to your office,” she said. “I don’t want your employees to think I’ve turned you into my own personal sex slave.”

“Now there’s a fantasy we have to explore,” Dec teased.

Rachel stopped in the bathroom to brush her teeth, then looked at herself in the mirror. She couldn’t help but smile. This had become her life, here in this house, with Dec. She didn’t even miss her own place and had only made quick visits home to pick up some clothes and the mail.

She reached out and set her toothbrush on the edge of the sink next to Dec’s. Her make-up bag had a place on a shelf above the toilet, and her shampoo and conditioner sat on the bench in the shower stall beside Dec’s.

This was what it was like to have a real relationship, one that was going somewhere. But even the growing familiarity between them hadn’t entirely dispelled her doubts. What would happen once her stalker was caught? They obviously wouldn’t spend their days together. Dec had a job and so did she. And they wouldn’t need to live together. He’d probably want his privacy back. Would they go back to a more traditional relationship-dinners together during the week, a couple overnight stays and weekends spent together? She wouldn’t be disappointed by that. But she’d grown fond of this closeness they’d developed and the intimacies that had followed.

She walked through the kitchen and opened the cupboard where Dec kept the coffee. She poured a good measure into the filter, then grabbed the pot to fill it with cold water. It was such a mundane task, Rachel thought, but satisfying. Once the coffee was done, she and Dec would relax in bed and read the morning paper. Yesterday they’d made love before getting in the shower together. Today, she wasn’t sure what would happen and she liked that.

When she returned to the bedroom with the coffee and the paper, Dec was sitting up, his legs hanging over the side of the bed, a frown on his face.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“That was my office. One of the investigators I put on your case turned up something.”

“What?” she asked.

“One of your clients was arrested last year for stalking. Her name is Janice Krandall. What can you tell me about her?”

“Nothing,” Rachel said, handing him his coffee.

“What?”

“Nothing. I have a strict confidentiality agreement with my clients. How did you get her name?”

“I went through the files you keep in your briefcase.”

Rachel gasped, unable to believe what she was hearing. “What?”

“I knew you wouldn’t tell me who they were-that you couldn’t tell me-so I took it upon my-”

“Don’t you dare say it,” Rachel warned, grasping her coffee mug in white-knuckled hands. “You know that was completely out of bounds.”

He shrugged. “It may be your job to protect their privacy, but it’s my job to protect you. And I’m going to do anything I have to do. Now, tell me about this woman.”

“No!” Rachel said, unable to control her anger any longer. “Do you realize what you’ve done? You’ve put my professional reputation at stake here. If my clients aren’t completely assured of their privacy and my confidentiality, then they won’t come to me for help.”

Dec stood up and crossed the room, then grabbed her arms. “Listen closely. I don’t care. If this woman is out to get you, to hell with her confidentiality.”

“If you don’t care about this,” Rachel said, “then you can’t possibly care about me. I’m a licensed counselor who is expected to follow a code of ethics. This is my career.” With that, she turned and walked out of the bedroom. But once she did, she realized that she didn’t have any place to go.

Cursing, she went downstairs to the small laundry room off the back hallway. There, she found a skirt and a top she’d tossed in the dryer yesterday. She stripped out of her robe and tugged the clothes on, then slipped into a pair of flip-flops.

She was out the door before she even had a chance to think about what she was doing. But once she reached the street, Rachel realized that she really wasn’t in any danger. They’d been careful to keep her location at Dec’s house a secret.

Just to be sure, she headed in the opposite direction from her own house, toward a park a block and a half away. But she’d barely reached the corner, when Dec ran up behind her. He wore a pair of baggy cargo shorts and was barefoot.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Taking a walk,” she muttered. “Go home. I don’t want you with me.”

He reached out and grabbed her hand, but she yanked her arm away. “If you’re out here, then I’m with you,” he said.

“You had no right,” Rachel replied, turning on him. “That crossed the line.”

“It’s hard to tell where the fuckin’ line is,” he shouted. “Where’s the line going to be if you get hurt? Or if someone comes out of the dark and shoots you? Am I supposed to go back then and look for it? As far as I’m concerned, there’s no line when it comes to your life.”

Rachel spun around and continued walking, but he came up behind her and grabbed her around the waist, picking her up off her feet. The strength of him took her breath away and she fought against his grip.

“Let go of me!” she shouted.

“Not unless you promise to come back to the house,” Dec said.

“No, I want to take a walk.”

“Then you’re not going anywhere.”

Rachel kicked at his legs and suddenly, she hit him in exactly the right spot. He cried out in pain as his knee buckled beneath him and they both tumbled on to the soft grass of a neighbor’s front lawn. She landed on top of him and Dec rolled her over, pinning her arms above her head.

“We’re going home,” he said.

“Let go of me.”

He did as she asked, standing up beside her and rubbing his knee. “We can discuss this at home,” he murmured, holding out his hand to her.

Rachel sighed, then sat up, bracing her arms behind her. “All right,” she said. He grabbed her hand, helping her to her feet. Then he reached around and brushed the grass off the back of her skirt.

They walked in silence to the house. He held her hand, his fingers tangled in hers and when they reached the back door, he opened it and followed her inside. The moment the door closed behind him, he grabbed her, taking her face in his hands and kissing her. “Don’t you ever get angry at me for caring about you,” he murmured. “I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe.”

Rachel looked up into his eyes and she saw the frustration and anger there. She couldn’t blame him entirely. He probably wasn’t aware of the ethical rules she was bound to follow. And after a week on the case with no decent leads, he was probably desperate enough to risk her wrath. “You’ll forget her name and what you know about her, is that clear?”

He drew a deep breath and closed his eyes. Then he wrapped his arm around her neck and pulled her to him. “All right. Just don’t ever run off like that again. You scared the shit out of me. I’m not sure what I’d do if something happened to you.”

His hands skimmed over her body as if he needed to reassure himself that she was here and safe. Rachel felt her anger toward him slowly dissolve and before long, she returned his touch, smoothing her palms over his naked chest.

He moaned softly as she first sucked, then bit his nipple. “That’s right,” he murmured. “I’ll take my punishment.”

She reached down and grabbed his crotch and squeezed it, just hard enough to cause a little pain and he sucked in a sharp breath. “I deserved that, too. Would you like to spank me?”

Rachel stepped back and looked directly into his eyes, the blue depths twinkling with humor. “This is serious.”

He reached up and smoothed his hand over her cheek. “Yes, it is,” he said.

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him, tentatively at first and then with enough desire to prove to him that he was forgiven. But Dec wasn’t one to leave it at that. He took control of the kiss with his tongue, sweeping Rachel into an embrace that was more than just conciliatory.

When he tugged at the hem of her shirt, Rachel lifted her arms over her head. He wasn’t the only one who needed reassurance. They’d never argued like that before and she had been frightened at how angry she’d become. Dec had taken advantage and crossed the line, something that she never would have been able to forgive in another man. But forgiveness seemed to be the only thing possible now.

Dec lifted her up onto the edge of the kitchen counter and slowly teased at her nipple with his tongue. Rachel raked her hands through his tousled hair and smoothed her thumbs over his forehead, taking in all the details of his face. She’d grown so familiar with Dec that sometimes she forgot just how handsome he was.

Dec hooked his fingers in the waistband of her skirt and tugged it down, letting it drop onto the kitchen floor. Then he unbuttoned his shorts and they followed. He was already hard and ready and when he reached around and pulled her up against him, Rachel let out a soft cry of surprise.

He kissed her again, and his mouth ravaged hers, desperate to possess, to taste. Rachel drew his head back and looked into his eyes, but she could see only passion there. A thrill raced through her as she watched his desire build.

He leaned over and grabbed a bag from the counter behind her, then pulled out a box of condoms he’d purchased yesterday at the drugstore. Rachel laughed softly as she took them. “Did you leave these down here on purpose?”

“Maybe we should leave them all over the house,” he said, sucking on the skin below her ear.

Rachel opened the box of condoms, handing him one and he quickly smoothed it down over his stiff shaft. He pulled her to the edge of the counter and slowly entered her, the two of them watching as he buried himself to the hilt. A tiny sigh slipped from Rachel’s lips as Dec began to move.

If this was the way they settled all their arguments, then Rachel looked forward to having many more. It wasn’t difficult to forgive Dec anything, especially when he made her feel like this.

DEC SLOWLY PAGED THROUGH the catalog of sex toys, stopping every so often to examine a photo in closer detail. “You know, I’m getting pretty used to these little visits to Rachel’s House of Pleasure and Pain,” he teased. “I never know what I’m going to find.”

“There’s a really nice library on campus,” she said. “They have a wider selection of G-rated material.”

“No, no,” Dec replied. “I like the X-rated stuff. See, look at this. A life-size rubber doll for nine hundred dollars. Why would any guy need a real woman when he has a babe like this at home?” He tossed the catalog aside and picked up another. “Why do you have these? And don’t tell me you’re doing a study.”

“I have to keep up on all the trends in sex toys,” she said. “So I can talk about them on the radio. If my callers mention something I don’t know about, it hurts my credibility.”

“Nice,” he muttered. “What about these?” He held up another catalog, open to a page of vinyl underwear. “Would you ever wear something like this?”

Rachel shrugged. “If you wanted me to wear something like that. It’s only underwear. Some people find the feeling of vinyl very erotic. Like a second skin.”

A long silence grew between them as Rachel continued her work. He studied her from across the room, watching the way her hair fell across her face, the way she nibbled on the end of her pen as she read. “Is there anything you can’t talk about?” he finally asked.

“It’s my job,” Rachel replied. “It really doesn’t help my listeners to be bashful. They need an honest opinion and if I act embarrassed about the conversation, then that would be a judgment on my part.”

But he wasn’t talking about sex and her radio show. He wanted to know exactly how she felt about him, about what had happened between them yesterday. About what had been happening between them from the moment they’d met. After their fight the previous morning, he’d felt a very subtle shift in their relationship. It was like they’d both finally acknowledged they actually had a relationship.

Before the fight, they were having an affair. It had been all about sex and pleasure. But the fight had proved they were two individuals with different ideas and different goals trying to find a way to live in each others’ lives. If they wanted to continue to get along, then they’d have to work through a lot more conflicts.

And Dec knew there was another one coming up, starting right about now. “What time do you have to go to your group sessions?” he asked.

“We should leave here in about fifteen minutes,” Rachel said. “You can drop me off. I’m sure I’ll be fine. The office building is very secure.”

“I’m coming in,” he said.

Rachel glanced up from her desk. “If you’re sitting in the waiting room when my clients get there, you’re going to intimidate them.”

“No, I’m coming into the group session with you.”

She shook her head. “No, you can’t do that. The sessions are private.”

“Well then, I’ll just pretend to be one of them,” Dec said.

“You can’t,” Rachel said. “They have very specific sexual problems. You don’t seem to suffer from any, beyond the fact that you think about sex twenty-four hours a day.”

“Twenty-three,” he said. “The other hour I spend thinking about eating.”

“All right, twenty-three. They’d still spot you as a faker a mile away.”

“What kind of problems do these people have?” he asked. “Why are they coming to see you? At least you can tell me that. Are they perverts or something?”

“Pervert is not a recognized name for a person with a paraphilia,” Rachel said.

“You mean, these are foot people?” Dec asked. “Hey, I could be a foot person. After our night in the tub, I’m starting to develop a fondness for feet. Your feet in particular.”

“They’re not called ‘foot people’,” Rachel said. “They’re foot fetishists. And I don’t have a group for that.”

“What are your groups?”

“I start off with my Socially Repressed Gamers. They’re mostly computer guys who are approaching their thirties and have never had a girlfriend. After that, I have my sexual addicts. They’re mostly divorced guys who managed to screw up their marriages by screwing around. And then I have my furries and plushies. They’re a mixed group, men and women, who are sexually aroused by others in animal costumes and by stuffed animals.”

“So that’s the group that this Janice Krandall is in?”

“You can deduce what you must,” she said. “I’m not saying a word.”

“These don’t sound like people who are on the edge of a major meltdown here. Why can’t you just cancel until we catch the woman who’s been harassing you?”

“I can’t. I won’t,” she said. “I should be seeing them every day, but once a week is all I get. If we miss a session, then it takes another two to get back to where we were.”

“I’m going to come in with you,” Dec insisted. Though he knew he was pushing it, he needed to make it clear to Rachel that he wasn’t going to give up so easily.

“You can’t. Counselor-client privilege.” Rachel drew a deep breath. “Unless-”

“What?” Dec asked.

“Unless we go in, tell them exactly who you are and why you’re there and you ask permission to sit in. They’d all have to say yes before you can.”

“But that won’t do me any good. They’ll be suspicious of me right away. No one will open up.”

Rachel shrugged. “That’s the deal. You can take it or leave it.”

He considered the offer. At least it was a chance. “All right,” Dec said. “I guess I have no choice. But if they don’t let me in, then I’m going to stand outside that door until you’re finished.” He picked up the catalog again and stared at the cover. “Do you have dirty magazines at your other office too or do I have to bring these along?”

Rachel slammed her book shut and stood up. “Come on. We might as well get out of here now. I’m not going to get any work done with you sitting here watching me.”

Dec jumped to his feet and Rachel grabbed her purse, then opened the office door. To her surprise, Simon was standing just outside, as if he’d been listening with his ear pressed against the door. Rachel cleared her throat and Dec gave the young man a wilting glare.

“I’m going over to my group sessions, Simon. I’ll call in later this afternoon for my messages.”

Simon gave her an uneasy smile. “I thought we were going to work on the new journal article. I have all the citations ready and I’d like to go over them with you.”

“We have time on that,” she said. “It’s not due until September.”

“But you know how busy it gets at the beginning of the school year,” he said. “I think it would be best to get it out of the way now, while you have extra time.”

“All right,” she said. “Why don’t we plan to work on it tomorrow morning. I’ll come in at nine.”

Dec gently took Rachel’s elbow and steered her out of the office. “I don’t like the way that guy looks at you,” he murmured. “Your buddy Ellsworth might be right. Maybe Simon is in love with you.”

“Don’t be silly. Simon wouldn’t risk his job. He’s on to bigger and better things at the end of next semester.”

“I just have a bad feeling about him. He’s hiding something.”

“Are you suspicious of everyone?” she asked.

“No, just of clingy, over-protective graduate students who think they run your life.”

It was a beautiful summer day with a cool breeze blowing in off the Atlantic. They walked to Dec’s car, parked near Rachel’s space in the lot and he held on to her elbow, keeping a watchful eye on their surroundings.

He hadn’t told Rachel about the box that had been delivered to the radio station or about the message inside. Over the past few days, she’d begun to relax again. There’d been no new contact and Dec could only hope that her stalker had found something else to occupy her time. Yet, in his head, he knew that this might just be the calm before the storm.

He’d always taken his job seriously, but this had become more than a job for him. He actually was beginning to believe he and Rachel might have a future together and Dec was willing to do everything in his power to protect that future.

It was easy to imagine himself living with Rachel, having her in his bed every night and every morning, sharing breakfast with her, calling her to chat in the middle of the day. These were such simple things, things he used to believe were unimportant. But for the guys who had a woman to love, simple things made a difference. Dec could see that now.

He opened the car door for Rachel and she slipped inside. Bending down, he tucked the hem of her skirt inside and she turned and smiled at him. And at that moment, it hit him, like running full speed into a brick wall.

“Oh, God,” he murmured after he shut her door. He was in love with Rachel. He’d been so damn busy protecting her he hadn’t seen what was happening to him. The revelation, though quite sudden, wasn’t as disturbing as he thought it would be. He loved Rachel. What was wrong with that?

Dec tried to list all the reasons he’d always given for remaining single. He was free to date any woman who walked into his life. His time was his own. There was no one to tell him what to do or where to be. But he didn’t want anyone else but Rachel and he liked spending all his time with her. And she never really told him what to do or where to be. In truth, she was happy to have time to herself.

He got into the car and fumbled with the key in the ignition. Dec glanced over at Rachel, only to find her watching him, a frown on her face.

“Are you all right?” she asked.

“Sure,” he said. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I don’t know. You look a little pale.” She reached out and placed a hand on his forehead. “Are you feeling sick?”

Dec shook his head. “Nope, I’m just a little hungry.”

“We can stop and pick up something to eat before group. I’ll be tied up from ten to two, so I’m not going to be able to catch lunch until afterwards.”

“Naw, I’ll be fine,” he said.

“We haven’t been getting a whole lot of sleep lately,” she said. “I hope you’re not coming down with something.”

Dec chuckled. Another benefit to having Rachel in his life-someone to worry over him when he was sick. It was just getting better and better, he mused. “Are you saying I can’t keep up with you?”

“Of course not,” she replied. “I’m saying maybe we should try to sleep when we go to bed, instead of spending the night in other pursuits.”

“Baby, as long as we’re in the same room together, sleep is always going to be the last thing on my mind.”

Rachel shook her head. “You’re incorrigible.”

No, Dec thought to himself. He was in love. And though he wasn’t ready to say the words out loud, there was a certain satisfaction in knowing they were true and that someday, very soon, he would say them to Rachel.

“I VOTE WE LET HIM STAY.”

Rachel smiled at Debbie. “All right. Are you sure about that?”

“No,” she said. “Kyle told me to vote that way.”

Rachel turned to Kyle. He held a fake fur blanket and stroked it as he glanced nervously around the room. “Did you tell Debbie how to vote?” she asked.

He shook his head. “She can never make up her mind. We’ll be here all afternoon if we have to wait for her.”

Rachel turned back to Debbie. “Why do you think Kyle feels that way, Debbie? Do you-”

“Can I interrupt here?”

The group turned to look at Dec, some of the members a bit taken aback by his commanding tone. Rachel sent him a warning glance. “I don’t think you should,” she said.

“No, I think you should let him talk,” Debbie said.

Evan raised his hand, then stood up. “He’s not allowed to talk until we vote for him to stay. Then he can talk.”

“Will you just all get a grip!” The group turned to Daryl, who sat in his chair wearing a pair of rabbit slippers. “We have an hour. If we spend half the time talking about voting and the other half voting, then the vote is a moot point.”

“My point exactly,” Dec said. “Thank you. Now, rather than discuss this, I thought we might have a show of hands. How many people want me to stay?”

“Can we have a secret vote?” Debbie asked.

“You already voted,” Kyle said.

“All right,” Dec interrupted. “Everyone, close your eyes. Who thinks it’s all right for me to stay?”

Rachel watched as everyone slowly put their hand up. Dec nodded, then clapped his hands. “Great. Then it’s settled.”

“How do we know you’re telling the truth?” Kyle asked.

“He’s telling the truth,” Rachel said. “Everyone had their hand up.” This was not going well, she thought to herself. Though Dec had been invited to stay and watch her first two groups, she found him a distraction, as did many of her clients. The gamers had questioned him thoroughly and once they learned he was in naval intelligence, they wanted to hear all about it. The sex addicts were interested in hearing about his sexual conquests as a single guy. And now, her furries and plushies, the most fractured of her groups, had suddenly all voted the same. She’d never been able to get them to agree on anything before.

Rachel cleared her throat. “Now that we’ve got that settled, why don’t we pick up from where we left off last week.”

“You would be a really good tiger,” Evan said, pointing to Declan.

Dec blinked in surprise. “A tiger?”

“Yeah,” Debbie said. “I met a tiger once and he was so hot. He let me touch his tail. It was very erotic.”

Dec frowned and Rachel could see he wasn’t quite sure how to respond. “I actually think Declan would make a good bear,” Rachel suggested. “He’s got the dark hair and the strong jaw. And he does like to growl a lot.”

“If you could dress up as any animal, what would it be?” The group turned to Janice Krandall, who’d been sitting silently to the right of Rachel. She sent Dec a hesitant smile and it was clear to Rachel that Janice had been immediately smitten with the new member of the group.

“Declan, what kind of furry would you want to be?” Rachel asked.

Dec considered the question for a long moment. “I guess I’d have to go with a horse. A stallion. A black stallion.” The group stared at him and Dec glanced over at Rachel. “What? Too obvious?”

“I don’t see a lot of horses as furries,” Evan said. “First of all, they can’t walk on two feet.”

“Yes, they can,” Janice said. “Those Lippizanner stallions do. And I met a horse once.”

“Mr. Ed was kind of nice,” Kyle piped up. “And Trigger. They’d make good furries.”

The rest of the session didn’t go much better. Rachel spent most of the time mediating arguments about whether certain animals could or could not be considered furries. Then, there was a very heated side discussion on the current confusion in the news media between furries and plushies. In the end, Rachel didn’t accomplish anything beyond providing Dec with absolute proof that Janice Krandall couldn’t possibly be capable of stalking her.

When the group finally left, Rachel sat back in her chair and watched Dec with a smug smile. “Are you satisfied?”

“I really wanted to be a stallion,” he teased.

Rachel growled, then stood up. “I’m talking about Janice Krandall. You must know she couldn’t be the one doing this.”

Dec nodded. “Yeah, you’re right. Besides, she told me she was out of town last weekend at a furry convention in Atlantic City. She couldn’t have trashed your office.”

“Good. So we’ve ruled out my clients. What’s next?”

Dec frowned. “Explain to me this furry thing. They dress up in animal costumes and they mess around?”

“It’s like a disguise they wear,” Rachel said. “A way to hide their fears about relationships and the opposite sex. It’s no different than what you might do when you meet a woman you’re attracted to. You might tell a few stories, exaggerate a little, try to impress her. We all have our fears of rejection. The furries hide theirs behind a costume.”

“That’s a little sad,” Dec said.

“It’s just the way it is,” Rachel replied. “Everyone has their oddities and foibles. You’d probably get turned on if I wore a French maid’s outfit, right?”

Dec chuckled. “Are you saying you’d wear a French maid’s outfit for me?”

“I’m saying that you relate a French maid with something sexy. These people relate a person in an animal costume with something sexy. It’s not that wide a leap between the two.”

Rachel stood up and walked to her desk, then put her legal pad into her briefcase. “I just think that so many people are out there trying to make a connection,” she continued. “To find someone who might want to love them. And sometimes we have to make that happen however we can, even if it means dressing up in an animal suit. I don’t judge any of my clients, or anyone for that matter. As long as they don’t hurt someone else or themselves, then I think it’s all right.”

“So then why are you trying to convince them to put their suits away?” Dec asked.

“That’s not what I’m trying to do. I’m trying to give them a way to see what affection and attraction can be like outside the suit. And maybe they’ll find out that they can function pretty well without all that fake fur.”

Dec walked to the door, then stopped Rachel before she opened it. He ran a finger along her jawline then gave her a gentle kiss. “I don’t know how you do it,” he murmured.

“Do what?”

“You don’t make judgments,” he said.

“I don’t see the point,” she said. “When it comes to sex and love, sometimes the journey is as important as the destination.”

Rachel looked up into his eyes, losing herself for a few moments in the deep blue depths. Was he falling in love with her? Or was that just her imagination playing tricks on her? Or was it wishful thinking? He seemed genuinely fond of her, that much she could say. But Rachel still couldn’t separate the man from the job. How much of what he said and did was part of his protecting her?

“I think I’d like to go home,” Rachel said.

“All right. Let’s go. I’ve got some things in the fridge we can make for lunch.”

“No,” Rachel said. “I want to go to my house.”

Dec paused. “I don’t think that’s a very good idea.”

“I don’t care. I just want to lay down on my bed and close my eyes and pretend that my life is going to get back to normal soon. If you’re good at what you do, then you can protect me there. At least for a few hours.”

“All right,” Dec said. “But when I say it’s time to leave, then it’s time to leave.”

Rachel nodded, then smiled. “Thanks,” she murmured.

They walked out of the downtown office building and strolled the two blocks to where Dec had parked the car. They’d driven only a few minutes when Dec cursed softly. “I think we’re being followed,” he murmured.

Rachel twisted to look out the back window, but he stopped her. “Don’t look. Just pretend we don’t see her.”

“It’s her?” Rachel asked.

“I’m not sure. Let me try to lose the tail and we’ll see.” He made a couple of crazy turns, switching lanes at the last minute and watching in the rearview mirror. Rachel held her breath, her heart slamming in her chest. Every now and then, she could see the car in the side view mirror. But then, suddenly, she watched as it turned off behind them.

“Is she gone?”

Dec nodded. “For now.”

“It was probably just someone going in the same direction as we were. Now we’re both getting paranoid.”

“No,” Dec said. “That car was definitely following us. And it fits the description of the car that Jerry gave me.”

“Jerry gave you a description?”

“Of a car that he’d seen around the station,” Dec said. He shook his head. “I don’t like this, Rachel. I don’t think we should go to your house. It just doesn’t feel right.”

“Can we at least just stop there?” Rachel begged. “I need to pick up some more clothes and I forgot to grab that cookbook that I wanted.”

“We’ll go tonight,” he said. “After things quiet down. I promise.”

“All right,” she said.

He stared out the front window, watching the traffic and glancing in the rearview mirror every few seconds. Rachel hated when he was forced to be the professional. The Declan Quinn she loved disappeared-the humor, the wit, the boyish charm-and was replaced by a cool, calculating stranger.

“So, how do you think I’d look in that maid’s outfit?” she asked.

A grin twitched at his mouth and after a moment, he chuckled. “Pretty damn good,” he said.