CHAPTER 43
International Place nestles in the curve of the High Street off-ramp from the Central Artery, right across the street from the new Rowe’s Wharf development on the waterfront. It’s about forty stories tall, with a four-story atrium lobby full of marble and glass. In the lobby is a dining space, and at one end of the dining space is a croissant shop. Hawk and I were sitting at one of the little tables in front of the croissant shop, having some coffee and acting just like we belonged there. The glass walls let in the sun and the movement of urban business outside. It was 10:20 in the morning and most of the tables were empty. A roundish young woman at the next table was enjoying black coffee with artificial sweetener, and a chocolate croissant.
“Tony know the spots, don’t he?” Hawk said.
He was wearing a teal silk tweed jacket over a black silk T-shirt, with jeans, and black cowboy boots. He leaned back in his chair, his legs straight out, his feet crossed comfortably at the ankles. I had on a blue blazer and sneakers. If there were a GQ talent scout in the building, our careers would be made.
“Major’s okay?” I said.
“Yeah. I told him Tony’s answer when we said Major had to take the fall.”
“‘Plenty more where he came from’?”
Hawk grinned. “What Major hate was not so much that Tony would let him take the rap, but that he didn’t matter. Major like to think he important.”
“Here’s his chance,” I said.
We each had a little coffee. We examined some of the secretaries on coffee break. There was one with sort of auburn hair whose dress was some kind of spring knit and fit her very well. We examined her with special care.
“You talked with Jackie?” I said.
“Un huh.”
“How was that?”
“Jackie don’t like shooting,” Hawk said.
“Nothing wrong with that,” I said.
“Except that I’m a shooter,” Hawk said.
The woman with the auburn hair and the knit dress got up and walked out of the dining area. We watched her go.
“She said she couldn’t love no shooter,” Hawk said.
I nodded.
“I said did she want me to get a paper route?”
“Nice compromise,” I said.
Hawk grinned.
“Jackie said that maybe there was a third alternative. She talks like that, third alternative. I said I was a little long in the tooth for third alternatives.”
“Never too late,” I said.
Hawk was silent for a moment. His face showed nothing, but his gaze was very heavy on me.
“Yeah, it is,” Hawk said. “Too late for me to be something else a long time ago. Anything but what I am is a step down.”
“Yes,” I said.
“You’re smart,” Hawk said. “You could do other things.”
I shrugged.
“How come you do this?” Hawk said.
“It’s what I know how to do,” I said. “I’m good at it.”
Hawk grinned.
“You want to be good at selling vinyl siding?”
“Rather die,” I said.
“Jackie don’t quite get that,” Hawk said.
A new coffee break shift appeared. Hawk and I were alert to it, but no one compared to the one with the auburn hair.
“Tony’s late,” Hawk said.
“Surprising,” I said, “seeing there’s some kind of sweet glop to be eaten.”
A blonde woman in pale gray slacks went up and got a cappuccino and a whole-wheat roll and came back past us. She was wearing a nice perfume.
“So Jackie’s gone?” I said.
“Un huh.”
“Too bad,” I said.
Hawk shrugged.
“You care?” I said.
“Don’t plan to,” Hawk said.
“She was a nice woman,” I said.
“Un huh.”
“You love her?” I said.
“You really bored?” Hawk said, “or what.”
“No, I just figured Susan would ask me, and if I said I hadn’t asked she would have shaken her head without saying anything. Now, if she does it, she’ll be implying something about you, not me.”
Hawk grinned again.
“You believe in love,” he said.
“I have reason to.”
“Yeah, maybe,” Hawk said. “But you have reason to because you believe in it, not the other way around.”
“How’d we end up,” I said, “talking about me?”
Hawk made a self-deprecating gesture with his hands as if to say, It was easy.
“It never seemed a good idea to believe in it,” Hawk said. “Always seemed easier to me to stay intact if you didn’t.”
We were quiet. The coffee was gone. The sun that had slanted in and squared our table had moved on toward the service bar.
“Erin was right,” I said.
“About me?” Hawk said.
“Yeah,” I said. “You’ve paid a big price.”
“Never said I didn’t.”
“And sometimes it hurts,” I said.
It was as far as I’d ever pushed him.
“Un huh.”
It was as far as he’d ever gone.