Down Among the Dead Men

6

Days passed with no progress on the jewel thefts. John Leaman, the anal retentive on the team, had spent days studying a map with the aim of profiling the offenders. The theory was that referencing the crime locations would pinpoint the likeliest area where the perpetrators had their base. If these had been one-man crimes, it might have worked. With a gang, the profile was never likely to provide the breakthrough. But the display board looked pretty decorated with push pins and pink strips.

‘I expect they drive in from Bristol or London,’ Keith Halliwell said. He’d long since given up sparing Leaman’s feelings.

‘If we had some idea where they’d strike next, it would help,’ Diamond said. ‘There are far too many big houses stuffed with valuables.’

‘Our best hope is a tip-off.’

‘Always is. But the snouts aren’t helping — which gives point to your theory about Bristol or London.’

‘The gang seem to know what they’re looking for. They take the major items and leave the rest.’

‘And it’s always a clean job. They must have a good look before they go in.’

‘Planning.’

‘But where do they get their information? How do they know who owns the rocks they steal?’

‘Bath People?’ Halliwell said.

‘Which people?’

‘Bath People. The magazine.’

‘I get you.’ The expensive glossy filled its pages with photos of the great and the good at local hunt balls, race meetings and glamorous fundraising events. The pages, that is, that weren’t filled with advertising.

‘All those women in posh frocks sporting the family jewels. Everyone is named. That’s how it sells.’

Leaman spoke up from behind his computer. ‘If you like, guv, I can look through the back issues and see if there’s a connection.’

‘What a good offer,’ Diamond said, resisting the temptation of winking at Halliwell. It was another perfect bum-numbing task for Leaman. ‘And I know where we can lay our hands on a stack of copies. Georgina buys it. In fact, she’s in it sometimes, rubbing shoulders with the lord-lieutenant and the mayor.’

‘Do you read it?’ Halliwell said in surprise.

‘Only at my dentist’s.’ He turned to Leaman. ‘Georgina keeps her copies on one of the filing cabinets in her office. Be sure to ask before you borrow them.’

Halliwell looked at Diamond. ‘Wouldn’t it be better if the request came from you?’

‘Me? I’m keeping my distance this week. She won’t mind. She’ll be tickled pink if we come across her picture.’

‘Wearing the Dallymore tiara?’

‘She’s always in uniform.’

Leaman went off to try his luck with Georgina, never shy of speaking to one of the high-ups.

‘He’ll have my job one day,’ Diamond said. ‘See if he doesn’t.’

‘I believe you, guv. By then, we’ll all be history except him. CID will be one man and his laptop.’

The grotesque fantasy came closer to reality before the day was out. Diamond picked up the phone and it was Georgina.

‘How ready are you?’

‘For what, ma’am?’ His mouth had gone dry.

‘For what we were discussing.’

‘The, em...?’

‘We leave tomorrow morning.’

‘Soon as that? I haven’t made any arrangements.’

‘You live alone like me, don’t you? What arrangements?’

He didn’t like to mention his cat. The neighbour would take over. Raffles spent much of his time in her garden anyway. ‘I haven’t spoken to Keith Halliwell.’

‘Tell him he’s in charge. You’re away for an unspecified time on police business. No need to say any more.’

‘I don’t know any more.’

‘Good thing. I’ve arranged for a driver. He’ll call at my house and pick me up first and we should get to you about ten fifteen. Pack for at least two weeks.’

‘Where are we going?’

‘Peter, there’s a very sensible rule in work of this sort called the need-to-know principle. I’m applying it. When it becomes necessary, you’ll be informed.’

Pompous old trout. ‘As you wish.’

‘Until tomorrow, then. Don’t sound so depressed. It could be quite an adventure.’ Now she sounded like a character out of Enid Blyton.

He broke the news to Halliwell, as much as he knew. ‘I don’t need to tell you, it’s not my choice.’

Halliwell couldn’t hide the smile. ‘You and Georgina? Someone at headquarters has a sense of humour.’

‘It came from the Home Office. She has friends in high places. I’m tagging along as the dogsbody.’

‘Have fun.’

‘Make sure you collar the jewel thieves while I’m away.’

‘Me and whose army?’

‘You’ve got Ingeborg and Leaman and young Gilbert. All good brains. Get them busy and put this one to bed before I’m back.’ He felt marginally better for saying that.

That evening he went for a parting meal with Paloma at the Ring O Bells in Widcombe Parade, almost a local for her. She’d got over her amusement and actually seemed sorry he would be away for a time. But their appetites weren’t affected. They tucked into the char-grilled rib-eye steak with lemon, chilli and parsley butter, fries and salad (his) and vegetarian bake with salad leaves (hers).

‘How long will you be away?’ Paloma asked.

‘It’s open-ended. I expect we’ve got to look at evidence that was heard in court and find out what went wrong, who was lying, and so on. That’s going to take ages.’

‘You’ll get some weekends off, I hope.’

‘I’ll make sure of that. God, I hope it’s not the other end of the country, Durham or some such. She’s not saying.’

‘Is it a state secret?’

‘The story hasn’t broken in the press.’

‘Does it still go on, one police force investigating another?’ ‘Less usual than it was. There’s an independent commission that does the job these days, but certain cases still get farmed out to mugs like me and Georgina. Nobody is comfortable with it. We won’t get a welcome from the locals. It’s a pig of a job.’

‘You’ll see another part of the country. Travel broadens the mind.’

‘Aren’t I broad-minded enough?’

‘No comment.’

‘Right now, Bath offers all I desire,’ he said, nudging her foot under the table. ‘Your place or mine?’

He was at home in Weston next morning when the police Land Rover drew up outside.

‘Don’t let me down,’ he said to Raffles, who had his head in the bowl lapping the jelly off a serving of ocean fish. ‘No fights, no birds, no small mammals. And keep off the street at all times. Oh, and try not to shrink away when Mrs Monument goes to stroke you. Otherwise, it’s life as normal. I envy you.’

He carried his holdall out and nodded to Georgina in the front passenger seat.

‘Is that all you’re bringing?’ she asked.

‘I’ll get by.’

The driver had the hatch door open. It was not encouraging to see two jumbo-sized pink suitcases taking up most of the luggage space. As if this was not enough, various garments in suit covers were hanging inside the vehicle and when he got in he found he was sitting between a vanity case and a set of golf clubs.

Golf clubs ^?

‘Don’t sit on my hat. It’s somewhere on the seat.’

They moved off, observed with indifference by Raffles, now perched on Mrs Monument’s front wall.

‘The first time I’ve seen where you live,’ Georgina said. ‘Quieter than I expected.’

‘You should hear it at the weekend when the lawn-mowers are going.’

They joined the A4 and headed towards the city, which he took to mean that their destination wasn’t the West Country. He wasn’t going to ask, even though the need-to-know principle wouldn’t be compromised now they were on the road.

‘I don’t suppose you heard the news,’ Georgina said from the front seat without turning her head. ‘There was another break-in last night. A large house in Upper Swainswick. The people were at the theatre. They got home to find the safe door open and an emerald necklace and matching earrings gone.’

‘Another one? That’s two in a week.’ He could imagine the mayhem in CID.

‘I don’t doubt that this is the same lot. They disabled the security system and got in through a back door. And it seems they knew what they were looking for. I hope DCI Halliwell is up to this.’

‘You were confident when we spoke yesterday.’

‘I didn’t expect he’d be tested as soon as this,’ she said with a shake of the head.

This was too good an opportunity. ‘If it worries you, ma’am, we can make a slight change of plan. We’re heading towards the city. Drop me in Manvers Street and I can take a look at the scene and join you later.’

‘Oh no, no, no, no, no,’ she said. ‘I’m not falling for that one, Peter. I know exactly how your mind is working. Phone messages to say more evidence has come up and you’re delayed. I’m sorry, but Halliwell will have to cope. This mission has priority over everything. I need you at my side from the word go.’

As caddy? he thought.

The Land Rover cruised through the city and a short way along the London Road and then right at the traffic lights and over Cleveland Bridge, taking the A36. They were travelling south, through Wiltshire. The next place of any size would be Salisbury. He hadn’t heard of any bent coppers there, but the Salisbury and South Wilts was said to be the finest downland golf course in the country.

‘I hope you locked away your jewellery somewhere really safe, ma’am,’ Diamond said, for his own amusement. ‘You’re chancing it, leaving Bath while this gang is operating.’

She puffed herself up. ‘In the first place, I don’t live in a country mansion, and in the second I don’t go in for expensive jewellery. The only valuables I have are personal items of no market value whatsoever.’

‘I expect you’ve won a few silver cups in your time.’

‘You noticed my clubs, then. It’s a hobby. I don’t win things. There might be the chance of a round where we’re going. Do you play, Peter?’

‘Not my game at all.’

‘You go in for mind games, don’t you? Pulling the wool over the eyes of your superiors. Superior in rank, not necessarily in guile. Can you swim?’

‘If necessary, yes.’

‘Not from choice? You don’t go looking for opportunities to demonstrate your freestyle?’

‘I’m a breaststroker.’

A volley of laughter escaped her as if she was a fourteen-year-old. ‘Find me a man who isn’t.’

Georgina in this skittish mood was a revelation, and not one he enjoyed. A foretaste of dreadful days to come? He didn’t want to get chummy. He preferred her talking to him through the steel-mesh barrier of rank.

‘The reason I mentioned swimming,’ she added, ‘is that you may get the chance of a dip, the place we’re going.’

She made it sound like an invitation to sex. He would have told her he hadn’t packed his shorts, but on present form she’d have an orgasm. Instead he said, ‘I dare say we’ll be busy with other things.’

‘Possibly.’ He’d given her the chance to volunteer something about the purpose of the trip, but she wasn’t playing. With the talk of golf and swimming, he was beginning to wonder if the so-called mission was genuine police business at all. Could Georgina have flipped?

While they skirted Salisbury by way of Wilton, she pulled down the sun visor and adjusted the vanity mirror so that she could look at him without turning round. Was she just enjoying the power she had over him or did she think she was seducing him? She was humming some tune to herself.

Through all this, their driver remained silent, robotic, as he was trained to be. What he would tell his mates back in Bath when he was off duty was cause for alarm. Manvers Street was a rumour factory.

They picked up the A36 again and continued southwards along a dual carriageway through open country.

Finally, Georgina put an end to the waiting game. ‘We’ll be based in Chichester. Do you know it?’

He was cool, as if he’d known all along. ‘Not really. I visited a couple of times a while back, that’s all.’

‘Sussex police requested my help. When I say “Sussex police” I mean a former colleague, Archie Hahn. And when I say “my help” I mean precisely that. We went through staff college together and got on rather well. They set us various aptitude tests and command tasks, such as getting across a wide stream using two planks and a barrel, and Archie always knew exactly what to do. A brilliant man.’

Diamond found it hard to imagine Georgina crossing a stream with two planks and a barrel. Whoever Archie was, he was a man to be reckoned with.

‘Commander Hahn now. We haven’t kept in touch, but I evidently made an impression on him because he thought of me when they had this spot of bother that needs attention from outside their own force. It’s a police matter and they want it sorted by police, rather than putting it to the IPCC.’

‘What’s the spot of bother?’

‘He hasn’t explained yet.’

‘It’s got to be serious if he can’t deal with it himself.’

‘So one presumes. I’ll find out this evening. He’s taking me for a meal at Raymond Blanc’s.’

Bully for you, Diamond thought. ‘Does he know you’re not alone?’

‘You’re wondering if you’re invited? Sorry, Peter, but he doesn’t know about you. You’re my secret weapon.’

‘That’s a first for me.’

‘So I suggest you come to my room when I’m back from my dinner date and I’ll bring you up to speed.’

‘Are we staying in the same place?’

‘Oh, I’ll make sure of that.’

‘Did you book us in somewhere?’

‘No, I left that to Archie.’

‘But he doesn’t know there are two of us. He’ll only have booked one room.’

She smiled into the mirror. ‘Don’t fret, Peter. These days almost all the rooms are doubles. I’ll squeeze you in one way or another.’