Elect

Chapter Twenty-one Nixon

The shitty part was that I couldn’t react. Chase hadn’t answered my last text and I knew Trace’s schedule like the back of my hand.

To say my heart was shattering into a million pieces would be a gross understatement. I’d never felt such pain as when I saw the fear in Trace’s eyes as she clenched Chase’s hand and walked down the hall. I watched Luca watch them and I knew it was bad. So bad, in fact, that if Chase didn’t do something soon, to prove we weren’t playing him… Well, things wouldn’t be good.

He slammed her against the wall.

My girlfriend.

He took her hand, my hand, and pressed it high above her head, while he used his other hand to dive into her thick luscious hair. His mouth was on hers.

Her mouth was on his.

Tongue. Oh hell yeah, I saw tongue. Her tongue, to be exact, so I couldn’t really get pissed at Chase. Shit, I knew what that tongue was capable of. It would bring any male to his knees. Which was why it surprised me to see Chase being so rough with her.

Not tender. And maybe that was the problem. An issue I’d have to talk to them about. He was aggressive; she tried to fight him back in the aggression. They weren’t a team about what they were doing. Anyone with two eyes could see they looked like horny teenagers. But in love? No. Not at all.

I was both relieved and terrified.

And in that moment realized I had to talk, with both of them, but mainly with Trace. Damn if I didn’t need to do what I’d promised I’d never do.

But if I was protecting her? If I was saving her life by driving her into another man’s arms? Would that redeem me in the end? Or just damn us all to hell?

“He’s not looking anymore.” I smiled sadly at Trace as her eyes flickered to the ground. I could tell she was about two seconds away from bursting into tears. Chase looked like he’d just gotten a hit of heroin, his color was so high.

“Both of you. Bat Cave, now.” I grinned for show, gave Chase a hard slap on the back and nodded to Trace.

Ten minutes later and we were all sitting in silence.

“That was…”—I whistled—“the worst acting I have ever seen in my entire life.”

“What?” they yelled in unison.

“Yeah.” I nodded. “As in, you guys couldn’t even star in a porno, it was that bad. You guys are all… just wrong.”

“Wrong?” Chase stood and began pacing. “I did the best I could—”

“I know what you were doing and I appreciate it. You guys do a really good job of acting like teenagers who’ve never had sex before.”

Trace blushed while Chase just looked offended.

“He’s a brilliant man.” I ran my hands through my hair and looked between the both of them. “If he hasn’t already figured it out, he will and soon.”

“So what do you want us to do?” Trace whimpered. “I told you I’m a terrible actress—”

“Stop lying,” I said calmly. “Trace, you love him. It’s okay that you love him, I’m not stupid, you know.”

“What?” A few tears fell down her face. “What are you talking about?”

“I don’t want to lose you. At the rate you’re going, you guys are going to get us all killed by not giving us the time we need to dig deeper. Everything is on you making this relationship sell. Okay?”

“But—” Trace’s lower lip trembled. “We are trying!”

“No.” I shook my head. “Who bought you boots, Trace?”

“What does that have to do with anything going on?” Chase yelled.

“Trace,” I repeated. “Who bought you the damn boots?”

“Chase did,” she whispered.

“Who saved you from ridicule at the welcome back party when I called you out in front of the entire student body?”

She closed her eyes as a single tear ran down her cheek. “Chase.”

“Who protected you from Phoenix?”

Trace said nothing.

“Who never left your damn side when I listened to your grandfather’s orders and pushed you away?”

And again with silence.

I had to get it out. I had to do it. There was no other way. “So as far as I’m concerned, it’s always been Chase. It’s never been me, Trace. All along it’s been him, and only him. From here on out, I’m the other guy, I’m the asshole who embarrassed you in front of your peers, the guy that threatened to destroy you. I am nothing, and Chase? He’s your savior.”

I walked out of the room and didn’t look back. I couldn’t. I knew if I did I would either fall to my knees and apologize for being so harsh, or cry for the first time since I was twelve.

I’d just singlehandedly given the love of my life to my best friend—on a silver platter, with a shiny bow attached.

And I didn’t care if I died, but if Trace died? Because of me? Because of my pride and inability to get over myself? I would pray for death. So if it meant I had to give up the only thing that I was living for? It would be worth it. If she was safe. It would be worth it. I repeated that to myself for the rest of the night, and when Trace came home and said nothing over dinner. I said it again, and again, and when I opened that bottle of whiskey and sat in my room, I said it again.

Until I passed out.

I woke up with a killer hangover. My fault. Grumbling, I took a shower and went downstairs to get some breakfast before I went over to the Space to see if Phoenix would change his tune.

“Hey.” Trace was sitting at the table eating some toast.

“Hey.” I waved. Idiot. She was sitting right in front of me.

Her eyes didn’t leave mine. I was frozen in place and could literally hear every beat of my heart in the silence.

“You’re wrong, you know.” She stood and walked toward me. “About a lot of things—everything, actually. And you’re an ass.”

“I—”

“I’m talking, you’re listening.” She smirked and grabbed the front of my shirt and pushed me toward the pantry. She slammed me against the door, pretty forcefully, I might add, and then opened it and shoved me in. I mean, I could fight her but I was too damn turned on and curious to do anything except stare at her.

“I. Want. You.” She took off her shirt. What the hell? “Only you.” Her jeans were next.

The pantry immediately became my number one favorite spot in the house.

Facing me in nothing but her scandalous white lacy underwear, she whispered in my ear. “This. What you see? What’s in front of you, it’s not just about me wanting you. I want all of you. I want to be vulnerable with you, exposed. But you have to let me… maybe the reason I don’t want to open up that part of myself to Chase is because he isn’t you, Nixon. He doesn’t have this.” She placed my hand on her bare skin right above her breast. Shit, I was slowly dying inside. Did she even realize what the hell she was doing to me?

“He doesn’t have our history, our past, our drama. I love him, you’re right. I love him so damn much that I can’t imagine life without him. But he and I—we aren’t this. So tell me, Nixon. Tell me if you want me to forget. I’ll forget what we have, if that’s really what you want. If you want me to jump into his arms without looking back, I will. But know I’ll hate you forever for giving me up.”

“I’m not,” I interrupted her. “You can’t give up something you never had.”

She slapped me hard across the face. “You promised, Nixon. You promised me.”

I kissed her hard on the mouth, clenching her wrists in my hands as I pinned her against the door. “You’re right,” I growled and pulled away. “And I’m sorry for hurting us, for hurting you, but Trace… next time you trap me in a closet, in nothing but your underwear. I will take advantage of you. I’ll screw you until you forget your own name. Don’t play with fire, and don’t mess with me. I’m still terrible for you; he’s better, and I stand by what I did. Now move out of the way before I truly lose control and steal your virginity next to the damn Cheerios.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and glared as I sidestepped her and walked out of the pantry and directly into Tex.

“Whoa!” Tex looked at my face and then lower. His smile widened. “Taking care of business in the pantry or Mrs. Butterworth just make you horny?”

“Shut up.”

“It’s cool! She’s naked, I get it!” Tex called after me, while I raced back up the stairs, grabbed my phone and keys, and then ran out of the house. Away from Trace, away from everything.