Freaks: A Rizzoli & Isles Short Story

INT. APARTMENT BUILDING - HALLWAY OUTSIDE APT. -NIGHT 1 6

TIGHT ON Maura as she KNOCKS.

DOOR IS FLUNG OPEN TO REVEAL -

JANE RIZZOLI. It’s been three months since she nearly died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. She’s in sweats and T-shirt she’s had on for days, eats chocolate cereal. Maura steps past her.

MAURA

You look terrible.

JANE

Thank you.

Jane’s living room gives away what she’s been doing: nothing. Well, watching TV, surfing the Web. Dead flower arrangements, dead fruit baskets, deflated “Get Well!” balloons and cards. BOXES of shit from shopping channels.

MAURA

You’re making everybody late.

JANE

Even you would look terrible if a bullet had gone through you.

MAURA

Hmmm … laceration to your peritoneum and small bowel could explain your jaundiced color -

JANE

Hey — you may not casually discuss my privates, okay?

MAURA

“Casual” is occurring by chance, showing little interest or concern -

Maura is so distressed by the mess, she starts cleaning.

MAURA (CONT’D)

Three months … Jane, you could have read all of Shakespeare! Learned Finnish. (looks at an opened box) You’re a platinum member of the shopping channel.

JANE

I swear I’ll kick you out if you don’t stop cleaning.

MAURA

Is that why you banned your mother?

JANE

She told you that? She also tell you all her OCD banging and clanking isn’t restful? Wait, Finnish? Finland Finnish?

MAURA

The stress hormone, cortisol, suppresses your immune cells’ ability to activate telomerase.

JANE

So you say. Mine are fine.

MAURA

Quite simply, keeping your brain busy aids recovery. Mind-body -

JANE

Mind-business.

As Maura tries to lead Jane toward the bedroom -

MAURA

You are my business. C’mon.

JANE (clutching her side)

Ow! Stop! I’m not going.

MAURA

Still having pain?

JANE

No. I just like saying “ow.”

MAURA

Could be from an intermittent obstruction due to adhesions. When was your last bowel movement?

JANE

You just cannot control yourself, can you?

MAURA

I think you’re avoiding –

Maura stops short: there’s a DUMMY hanging from the ceiling.

MAURA (CONT’D)—

What is that?

JANE

Get Well gift from Korsak and Frost.

MAURA

That’s “restful?” Where’s your uniform?

Maura goes into her bedroom. We hear her rummaging around.

MAURA (O.S.) (CONT’D)

It’s disgusting in here …

Maura emerges with the uniform in a dry cleaning bag.

MAURA (CONT’D)

Put it on.

JANE

It makes me look like a man.

MAURA

We can do this the easy way or the hard way.

JANE

I am not a hero, Maura. Shooting yourself is not heroic.

Maura leaves tough love behind, takes her friend’s hand.

MAURA

The people of Boston think it is.

JANE

Eight People died, Maura. I don’t want a medal for that.

MAURA

Five of them were bad guys, Jane.

JANE

They’re giving a kid who saved a squirrel a medal. That’s more heroic.

MAURA

Cat. From a burning house.

JANE

Whatever.

MAURA

This ceremony isn’t for you. It’s for your fellow officers, your parents, the community. You’re a symbol, a heroic flesh and blood reminder of the Thin Blue Line.

JANE

Wow, that’s good. Almost had me.

MAURA

Okay. Hard way.