Full Cry

CHAPTER 10

“Thou unravished bride of quietness,” Gray quoted Keats. “However, once she was ravished, she babbled incessantly and usually it was a litany of my shortcomings.”

Sister laughed as she poured the Mumm de Cramant. They sat in front of the huge kitchen fireplace.

The coffeepot gurgled. She put the bottle of Cramant back in the ice bucket shaped like a sitting fox, a beautiful Christmas gift from Walter. Back at the counter Sister poured her favorite coffee, Shenandoah Eye Opener. “Cream? Sugar? Honey? I have crumbly brown sugar.”

“Barefoot.”

She brought him a steaming cup of black coffee, putting cream and honey in hers. “Gray, I’d forgotten how funny you can be.”

The deep creases around his eyes lengthened as he smiled. “Well, I might as well laugh at my own expense. Doesn’t cost a cent.”

“I imagine the divorce did, though.”

“Women extract their revenge for love lost, but here I am talking to one. You know, Sister, everyone has his or her story, and everyone can make excuses. It seems to me you can make a life or you can make excuses, but you can’t do both.”

She clicked her champagne glass to his. “Exactly.”

“Actually, I learned a lot. Theresa and I grew apart. Living with another person is like visiting another country; you have to learn a new language, and so does she. It’s obvious, but it wasn’t at the time.” He paused. “You and Raymond managed.”

“We practically killed each other, but we never did stop talking. And Gray, it’s no secret that he had his affairs, and, well, it’s more of a secret, I suppose, because women are better at glossing over these things, but I had mine.”

He perked right up. “Did you now?”

“I did, and I don’t regret a single one.”

“But you still loved Ray?”

“You can love more than one person at a time, and I don’t give a damn what the self-help books say, or the marriage mafia. If I hear the words ‘family values’ one more time, I may explode. All this business of how monogamy creates stability. Perhaps for some it does, but what creates stability is the balance of opposing forces or energies. And that’s Life According to Jane Arnold.”

“You’d forgotten how funny I could be—” He sipped more champagne. “—I’d forgotten how you cut right to the bone, right to the core of an issue. Most people don’t have the guts.”

She smiled. “Thank you, but I don’t know as it’s guts. I live on a farm. I work with animals every day of my life, as well as working in the soil. I believe all these ideas, overblown ideologies—religious or political—serve to drive a wedge between us and nature, between us and what we really are, which is a higher vertebrae, but an animal just the same.”

“Might I conclude that you are not enamored of democracy?”

“Democracy is running the zoo from the monkey cage.”

“What’s the alternative?” he asked.

“An enlightened despot, whether by birth as a king or queen or someone strong enough to accrue power to themselves. That’s the most efficient system, but we live in times that make that impossible. Democracy has become the Holy Grail of the West, of industrialization, and you know why. Because the real worship is not one man, one vote, it’s one man, one dollar. Commerce drives democracy, not vice versa.”

“I’ll have to think about that.” The firelight accentuated his high cheekbones.

“To change the subject, how long have you been divorced? The women in our club are dying to know.”

A boyish grin made him attractive. “Three years. My two children are grown. Mandy, whom we named for Nelson Mandela, back when he was incarcerated, is thirty-one. She’s a tax lawyer in my firm. I never thought she’d follow in her father’s footsteps. Mandy was the cheerleader/prom queen type, but she is a brilliant tax lawyer.” He stopped himself for a second. “I’m bragging.”

“Please do.”

“Brian, now, he is a maverick if ever there was one. He graduated from the University of Missouri, majored in animal husbandry; his specialty is cattle. He went on and got his doctor of veterinary medicine and now has a practice in Grand Junction, Nebraska. I swear he’s the only black cattle vet in the U.S.” Gray laughed. “Thriving practice. He loves his work.”

“Did you love yours?”

He reached for his coffee and took a sip. “This is delicious. Yes, I did, still do. The tax code will never be simplified in our lifetime because it’s not about taxes; it’s about congressmen distributing the pork. If a congressman from Florida can slip a provision into the code that gives some stone crab producers a big break, he will, and he’ll get re-elected. The hypocrisy of our taxes is outrageous. People focus on the IRS, the symptom of their pain, instead of focusing on Congress, the source of the sickness. There will never be a good tax lawyer out of work. I like it: it’s war without the guns. I go in to win.”

“I never thought of that.”

“I could tell you stories until sunup.”

“I wouldn’t mind.” She smiled.

He smiled back. “When did Raymond pass?”

“In 1991.”

“That long ago? I remember Sam calling to tell me in a sober moment.”

“You wrote a lovely condolence.”

“I liked Ray.”

“Everyone did. He was a big outgoing man who made everyone feel important. And he wasn’t acting. He loved people.”

“He was good to us. I never felt an ounce of racism from Big Ray.”

She stroked her chin for a second. “Not consciously, but by virtue of when we were born and where we were raised, which is to say the United States, damaging concepts crept into our minds. One has to root them out, stay vigilant. Still, Ray trusted people. What I find among most people concerning race is terrible mistrust. It’s a poison. He never had that poison.” She thought for a flash of Mitch and Tony.

“Yes, it is, but how do you wipe out three hundred years of it?”

“You don’t. At least not in a generation or two. But don’t you think if one dwells on it, then one is trapped?” She hesitated. “Hope I haven’t offended you. I know none of us can escape our gender, our age, our race, and those things affect one. The whole world can be against you, but if you view yourself as your enemies view you, you’ve lost. Grab mane and kick on!”

He leaned forward, the warm cup of coffee in his hands. “You know that’s why I admire you. You tell the truth.

Even if it’s painful, you call it as you see it. You said people liked Ray. People like you, Sister, because you’re honest and strong. And you’re not hard to look at either.”

She laughed again. “Gray!”

He laughed, too. “I know what you mean. The question for me as a political animal has always been: How do I address my oppression without being obsessed by it? I made the right decision for me. I became proficient at my profession, and I supported those leaders and causes that I thought would help our people. I also supported causes that have nothing to do with race. I love the symphony and never minded writing a check each year to the Opera Guild. In fact, how lucky am I to be able to give?”

“I feel the same way, although most of my giving is directed toward the hunt club and the No Kill Animal Shelter. Those are my passions. Well, if there’s a woman candidate who looks good, I’ll support her, but so many of them are more liberal than I am. You know, antiguns and all that.” She threw up her hands. “How can you live out in the country without guns?”

“You can’t.” He leaned back in his chair just as Golliwog sauntered through the kitchen.

“Time for treats.” She hopped on the counter to lick the plates.

“Golly, you get off of there,” Sister commanded.

“Make me.” Golly didn’t jump down until Sister came after her.

“All cats are anarchists.” Gray watched the imposing feline give Sister a baleful glance, as though she were the wronged party and not the other way around.

“Maybe I’d better start flying the black flag over the house.”

“Ever read that stuff? Bakunin?”

“No. I read Das Kapital in 1968, hoping it would help me understand the riots here and in Paris. Torture. Anyone who is a communist has a far greater capacity for tedium and repression than I do, tedium being the worst of the two.” She freshened his coffee. “Would you like more Cramant?”

“No, thank you. I have to drive Vagabond and myself back to the barn.”

“Good-looking horse.”

“Jumps the moon. I enjoyed hunting with him in Middleburg.”

“Troy Taylor is a fine huntsman, and Jeff Blue and Penny Denege are good masters. And they’ve got Fred Duncan, former huntsman at Warrenton there, too.”

“We’d hunt with Orange Hunt and Piedmont on occasion, and the last year I was there, I capped the limit at Old Dominion. You know, I had fallen into northern Virginia myopia, thinking that hunting stops south with Casanova Hunt and Warrenton. I’d forgotten just how much fun and how challenging hunting with Jefferson Hunt can be.”

“You couldn’t have said anything that would make me happier! We don’t have as much good galloping territory, obviously. We’re sinking down into ravines and clambering up foothills or mountain sides, especially at our westernmost fixtures, but if you can sit tight, there’s good sport.”

“May I ask you a personal question?”

“You can try.”

“Why didn’t you remarry?”

She took a long sip of coffee. “The truth?” When he nodded, she said, “For the first year after Big Ray’s death, I was numb. The second year I could feel, but it was a dull ache. When Ray died, I was fifty-nine. By the time I started to feel that I could be happy again, I was sixty-two. I thought, ‘I’m too old and no one will want me.’ ”

“Not true, of course.”

“You’re very kind, Gray, and then, then Peter Wheeler began to slow down. Peter and I had had an affair stretching throughout my forties. I stuck close to him. No affair. I mean, that was over, but I suppose I wasn’t emotionally available, even if someone had wanted me.”

“Actually, I think you scare the hell out of most men.”

“I do?”

“You’re six feet tall, probably taller when you were young, as I recall. You ride like a bat out of hell. You go through snow, rain, hail, sun, bogs, over stonewalls and big-ass coops. You come back smiling. You don’t have an ounce of fat on you, at least not that I can see. And you’re the master.”

Her eyes opened wide. “That’s fine with me. I wouldn’t want a man who wanted a weak woman.”

He laughed. “Touchdown.”

“Now may I ask you a personal question?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“What do you think Sam’s chances are of staying clean?”

“Good. No, better than good. The deaths of Tony and Mitch have scared him. That could have been him. He was that out of control.”

“The thieving?”

“He stole to feed his habit. I believe he’ll stay straight. If he doesn’t—” Gray threw up his hands. “—I have done all I can do. No more.”

“I see.”

“What do you think Sam’s chances are?” he asked her.

“I don’t know. I haven’t been close to him for years. I hope he pulls it together. He’s a good horseman, and those are hard to find. And, before he fell by the wayside, he was a good man as well.”

As Gray rose to go, being a Virginian, he knew not to ask if he could help do the dishes. Although that is considered helpful outside the South, especially among those who are not wealthy, in the South, you don’t ask unless you’re at a Yankee’s house. What you do, knowing hardly anyone has the money for servants anymore, while preserving the fiction, is to later send to your hostess flowers or something else she likes. Or you can ask her to dinner.

“Your cat has returned to her evil ways.” He laughed at Golly.

Sister clapped her hands. “You get down from there.” “Ha, ha.” Golly laughed, giving up her post just as Raleigh and Rooster hurried in, hearing Sister clap her hands.

“What’s up! We’re ready.” The Doberman’s ears lifted up.

“Yeah, I’d like a ride in the truck.” Rooster lived for rides, and he knew the county better than most humans who drove it.

“All right, boys. Just a bad cat.”

Disappointed, they sat down as Golly, bursting with pride, rubbed right up on Raleigh’s chest. The Doberman looked the other way.

When Gray drove out of the stableyard, Sister sat down for a moment before doing the dishes.

“Whooee.” Golly added her two cents.

The two dogs stared at their human. She looked into their beautiful eyes. “Boys, he makes me feel—” She shrugged. “—can’t explain it.”

“Yahoo!” Golly sat and purred. “Time for the beauty parlor, a facial, and hey, maybe a boob lift.”

“Golly, you are insufferable,” Rooster moaned.

“Yeah, just think if you had a boob lift, the doctor would have to hoist up eight of them,” Raleigh teased.

The calico swatted Raleigh, rubbed against Sister’s leg as she stood up, then sauntered off.

Sister watched her. “What gets into her?”

“You don’t want to know,” the dogs replied.