Funeral Note

Paula Viareggio McGuire

‘You will never guess, Mario,’ I said, ‘who I’ve just had on the phone?’

‘You are almost certainly right, love,’ he replied, ‘so save us both some time and tell me.’

‘The once and future First Minister, that’s all.’

‘Aileen? What did she want?’

‘Does the name Theo Fabrizzi mean anything to you?’ I asked him.

‘Not a light,’ he admitted. ‘Should it?’

‘If he was Italian, maybe, but he’s not, he’s Lebanese, so we’re both off the hook. He’s a classical pianist, and he’s the attraction at a charity event in Glasgow tomorrow night. Aileen’s got a spare ticket and she’s asked me to chum her. Front row seats; the First Minister himself is the guest of honour.’

‘That’s very nice,’ he murmured, ‘but why isn’t Bob going with her?’

‘She said he doesn’t fancy it.’

‘Mmm.’ Nobody is better than Mario at making a mumble sound sceptical.

‘That’s what she said. I don’t care why he isn’t; I am going to have very few more opportunities to get glammed up, so I’m going. . if it’s all right with you. Be warned; it’s advisable to answer “yes” to that.’

‘Yes,’ he chuckled.

‘I’ll cook tonight, to make up for it.’

‘No you won’t. I will, or I’ll bring something in. You’re not coming in from a day at your office to stand around in the kitchen.’ He can be a doll sometimes: most of the time; with me, all the time. ‘Anyway, you’re well in credit for the Starbucks and the croissants. Andy says thanks, by the way. They came in handy, saw us through a difficult interview. The gentleman in question. . well, he’s no bloody gentleman.’

‘You poor love,’ I murmured. That might sound soppy, but I know Mario’s secret side. He’s more sensitive than he would ever let on, and when someone he’s trusted. . and that means every cop in the force. . lets him down, it makes him very sad, as well as very angry.

‘Bah!’ he grunted, for he won’t admit it to anyone, not even me. ‘Listen,’ he continued, ‘in the wake of that I might be a wee bit later than usual this evening. I’ve got a call to make.’

‘Where? Out of town? Can you tell me?’

‘Not very far. Saughton Prison, in fact. The chief wants Andy and me to have a serious conversation with the man who set this whole sorry Varley business in motion.’