Hell Bent

Chapter 12

Dessa said good-bye to Dash, got the address of the pizza place, and was gone.

“Maybe you should invest in a bulletproof vest,” Dash said as he picked up the stray coffee cups and returned them to the coffee station.

“Wouldn’t do me any good,” I said. “I don’t think she’d aim at my heart.”

“Bulletproof jockstrap?”

I grinned. “Helmet. I think if I really crossed her, she’d take me down with one clean shot.”

He chuckled and walked off tugging at the cuffs of his shirt. The windows were bright enough, there was no use denying day had arrived. The pulse of the city was pumping.

I sat at one of the empty desks and tried to push the spike of hunger away. Nothing here to consume, Flynn. No one deserved that kind of death.

I rolled my fingers, grinding the rings between them, the metallic scrape becoming a rhythm to cover the song of the living. I closed my eyes and tried to lose myself to it.

Dash set something down beside me with a clunk.

I opened my eyes.

“I hate this plant,” he said.

Then he turned his back and walked toward the half-filled boxes by my old desk and started packing again.

I glanced down at the plant. A fern, I think. Did a check on the room: Eleanor wandering between desks, Terric and Clyde standing between the offices, talking quietly, Dash packing crap out of my desk.

No one was watching me.

I took a breath. Control would be good. Focused on the fern. This, just this one plant, was all the life I could have. So I was going to savor every damn frond.

I dragged the fingertip of my left hand gently along one arching branch of the thing, drawing out the life slowly, leaf by leaf, all the way to the arrow-sharp end, draining it, killing it. Reducing it to fragile brown bones.

I licked my lips, and my finger trembled just a bit as I moved on to the next branch. Repeated the process. Then again. And again. Slow as I could. Like a ritual. Like this would be the last life I’d ever taste. Like it could fill the endless hungry hole inside me.

Didn’t work. Nothing stopped the hunger.

Still, it was something. An offering to the monster. Enough to keep me in the clear for a few more minutes.

Which, really, was as good as it was going to get.

“...or are you going to walk?” Terric was asking as he strode across the room.

I glanced up, then around. Yep, he was talking to me.

About that time he noticed the dead plant next to me. His expression shifted from annoyed to something else.

“I’ll drive,” he said a little more gently. “Dash, I’m sorry to leave you with the packing. I’ll try to be back this afternoon.”

Dash gave Terric a smile. “The last thing you need to worry about right now is paperwork,” he said. “I got this. Good luck at the meeting.”

“See you boys soon,” Clyde said.

“Shame?” Terric pointed toward the door. “Let’s go.”

So we went. Hallway, elevator, street with people headed to work, headed to breakfast, headed home, and finally, his car.

I ducked in, my heart pounding too hard.

“Are you . . .”

“I’m hungry,” I said.

“Do you want—”

“No. Don’t. Just don’t talk to me for the drive.”

Terric started the car. That was the last of the world I paid attention to other than Eleanor’s cold hand resting against the back of my neck, which did some little good to cool the fire burning in me.

I closed my eyes behind my sunglasses and pushed the life around me away, far away.

If I could disappear in my head for a year, it wouldn’t be long enough.

Came to with the scent of bacon filling my senses.

Opened my eyes. I was still sitting in the passenger’s side of the car. The engine was not running. The car was parked. Eleanor was nowhere to be seen.

“Morning,” Zayvion said. He was sitting in the driver’s side of the car with a plate piled high with bacon. A fresh cup of coffee steamed in the cup holder.

“This is . . . odd,” I said.

“Eat,” he said. “You’re not going into that inn until you do.”

He shoved the plate of bacon at me, and I took it because, hey, free bacon. “Why?” I asked after I folded and ate three slices at once.

“You tuned out on the way over here. Terric said you needed food. There’s coffee.” He pointed.

I reached over, took the coffee, drank. Lots of sugar, lots of cream. Just how I liked it. Come to think of it, the bacon was just how I liked it too.

“I was just resting my eyes,” I said.

“Bullshit,” Zay said. His brown eyes were flecked with gold. So he was a little angry. Or ready to call on magic. Maybe ready to shut me down.

He was a good man.

“Do I look that dangerous, mate?”

He took a minute before he answered, then, “Yes. Terric said you haven’t been eating. And you’re having trouble controlling magic.”

“And you believed him?”

“Is he wrong?”

I gulped down coffee, set the cup on my knee. “He worries too much. And is upset about losing his job.”

“That’s not what I asked you,” Zay said. “Are you listening to me, Shame?”

“Of course.”

He gave me a look. I stopped, put the bacon down, wiped my fingers on my jeans, and turned toward him, pressing my shoulder against the door. “You have all the attention I have left, Jones. What?”

“Allie’s pregnant.”

Holy. Shit.

I opened my mouth. Nothing came out. Shut it. Tried again. “Hell yes! Congratulations, mate! That’s . . . It’s yours, right?”

He punched my arm. Hard.

“Ow!”

“Of course it’s mine,” he said.

“I’m . . . without words. Damn. This is great news. Happy news. Mr. Jones is going to be a papa. How’s that sitting with you?”

Some of the anger and tension drained out of him, replaced by a kind of nervousness I hadn’t seen since we were teens. “I’m thrilled?” He nodded, and exhaled. “A little terrified at times.”

“And Allie? How’s she taking it?”

He smiled. That head-over-heels-in-love look that hadn’t faded in all these years shone up the place. “She’s amazing. Calm. Happy. Beautiful.”

“So what does this happy news have to do with bacon?”

“She’s in the inn. My pregnant wife is in there, Shame. And I need you to be in control when you’re around her. We’re taking precautions until she gets through her first trimester with the baby. She and I aren’t using magic. Not together. Not at all, so far. The doctors . . . There isn’t any information on how breaking magic will affect an unborn baby. So we’re being careful. Very careful. And I need to know you won’t hurt her.”

I could get mad at that. My best friend didn’t trust me. But he was right to be worried about this. He was right to keep his baby and Allie safe from me.

“So?” Zay said. “How are you doing with Death magic? Really.”

“It pulls pretty hard.” I picked up my coffee cup but didn’t drink. “I can stay ahead of the hunger. I can stay ahead of the push to use it . . . let it use me. So far I haven’t done anything . . . certifiably evil. Food helps. Small destructions are good. The rings help.” I lifted my hand to show him them.

“Are you in control right now?”

“Yes.” I was not lying. I wouldn’t lie about this. Zay knew it.

“Good. Finish eating. The Overseer is waiting.”

I shoved the rest of the bacon in my mouth and took another drink of coffee. It was almost cold now. I’d been draining the heat from it while it was in my hand.

I drank it down cold, then nodded. “I’m good.”

He took one last hard look at me. I must have passed muster, because he opened the door and got out of the car.

I left the plate and cup in the car, mostly because I knew it would bother Terric, and pushed my sunglasses closer to my eyes. Looked around.

Huh. We were in the parking lot of my mother’s restaurant and inn. There weren’t any cars here that I didn’t recognize, which meant we were having a private meeting. Zay stopped next to me, a mountain of heat and life.

Man burned like a torch. More so now because he was tied to Allie, to her life, and to the new life inside her.

It was beautiful, really. Rare to see. And I was determined not to let that fall apart because of me.

We walked across the gravel to the door. I paused before opening it.

“How do I look?” I asked him.

He knew what I was asking. Was I throwing death vibes? Was I leaking Death magic?

Zay put a hand on my shoulder. Heavy. Wide. Hot.

I didn’t pull on the life in him. Not a single drop of all that gorgeous, rich life. His life.

He waited a second, then nodded. “You’re good, Shame.”

“Good? Come on, now. You know I am the best, Z.” I gave him a grin.

One eyebrow rose. “You’re all right.”

“The lies coming out of your mouth.” I pushed on the door. “I do not know how she puts up with you.”

“It’s a little thing called love,” Zayvion said so quietly I almost didn’t hear him. “Can’t run from it, can’t deny it.”

“Sure I can.”

“Now who’s lying?” he said.

We were in the main room. Warm. Smelled of breakfast food, bread, and pies or something sweet being baked for the afternoon crowd, with just a note of sausage or bacon.

The tables that lined windows and filled the high-ceiling and wood-beamed dining area were covered in dark green cloths, and centered with flowers. Chairs were wooden, floor was the original from when the old place had been a train station.

Sitting at one of the larger tables was the Overseer, Terric, Allie, and Victor.

“Morning, everyone,” I called out cheerily. “How goes the plotting and planning?”

“Good morning, Shamus,” Victor said.

Victor was old enough to be my father. I thought of him as my uncle, really. Gray haired, he wore heavy glasses that let him mostly get around on his own since he’d lost nearly all of his eyesight from the magical showdown before the apocalypse.

He had on a suit jacket, shirt, no tie. Looked like he was drinking tea. At his left was Terric, who gave Zay a look, then turned to watch me. Next to him was Allie, and she was beaming.

I didn’t know how I had missed it at the meeting just yesterday morning. But the woman glowed—literally. The life and, yes, magic, inside her was luminescent.

I gave her a big smile. “Al, you little vixen, you. What’s the good news, love?”

She pushed away from the table and walked right on over to me. Unafraid, that woman. She never disappointed. “Did Zay tell you?”

“He did. You’re going to be a mum, eh?”

She nodded, and the smile lit her eyes. “I am. How do you feel about being an uncle?”

“Over the moon.”

“Good,” Zayvion said. “How do you feel about being a godfather?”

That, I did not expect. “What? Are you joking?”

“No,” Allie said. “We are not. Would you be our child’s godfather, Shame?”

“Yes,” I said. “Of course. If you want me to be.”

And then Allie put her arms around me and gave me a hug.

Lord.

I clamped a fist around my hunger and put my arms around her like she was made of eggshells. I was determined I’d drink the life out of the building and every tree for an acre around before I so much as touched the life in her.

My heart slowed to a low, dragging beat. A beat I controlled.

Zay, just behind Allie’s shoulder, watched me. That look told me he’d take me down before I hurt her.

Good man.

She let go of me. Was still smiling as Zay stepped up and put his arm over her shoulder.

“We should celebrate,” I said, letting go of my control enough that my heart stuttered through a beat or two before it got its rhythm back. “Whiskey all around!”

“It’s six o’clock in the morning,” Terric said. “How about we have coffee and pie?”

“Spoilsport,” I said.

“What kind of pie?” Allie asked.

“For you and that godbaby of mine,” I said, “any pie you want.”

“I’ll see what they have,” Zay said.

And then he walked off to the kitchen, leaving Allie behind with us.

Correction: leaving Allie behind with me.

He hadn’t given me a higher compliment in years. It stilled me.

I would not let him down.

Allie and I walked over to the table and she took her place beside Terric, an empty chair on her other side for Zayvion, then Victor and the Overseer.

Eleanor floated over to her favorite perch in the dining room—the bar at the far end.

I sat off to one side of the table, putting as many chairs as I could between me and the living.

“Small group,” I noted.

“We’ve already spoken to the other Soul Complements,” the Overseer started. “So now it’s just the four of you.”

Zay came back from the kitchen with two pies in his hands. Set those on the table. Cherry and apple. Not a bad score.

He applied a knife to the apple pie.

“And what have the others decided?” Terric asked.

The Overseer shook his head. “I’d rather not say. If something happens, I don’t want any of you to have information that might harm the others.”

“So why have all of us here now?” I asked. “Do you expect me to cover my ears and hum while Zay and Allie talk to you?”

“Shame,” Victor said, “please. Show some respect.”

“All right: respectfully,” I said. “You do know we can hear each other?”

“Victor and I agreed it would be best,” the Overseer said. “Since you’ve all decided to stay.”

I turned my gaze to Allie. “Really?”

“This is our home,” she said. “And our home ground. If something comes our way, we know the place and people better than anywhere or anyone in the world. I’d rather fight or hide here.”

I didn’t have to ask Zayvion what he thought about that decision. His heartbeat was steady but hard, just a little too much adrenaline pushing through his veins. He didn’t disagree but he knew they were in for trouble. Fight. Flight. Maybe both.

And they had a baby to protect.

Hell.

Terric and I had already made our decision to stay put. Now there was even more reason to do so.

“Are you staying at your place?” I asked. “There’s room here at the inn if you want.”

“Thanks,” Allie said. “But we’re staying home. We’re close to the well of magic out there.” She nodded. “So we can access that pretty quickly if we need to.”

I didn’t ask her if they were accessing it because it was a powerful deposit of magic or because there was something about the St. Johns well that seemed to make healing with magic even easier. If they were hurt, being near that well might be the best for them. The best for Allie.

Zay was still busy serving pie, by looking at a person at the table, pointing the knife at one pie, then the other, and when the person nodded, cutting a generous slice and sliding it over to him.

The Overseer and Terric both took cherry; Victor and Allie had apple; Zay didn’t serve himself a slice. When he looked at me, I pointed at the apple and he just pushed the rest of the pie my way.

I didn’t bother with a plate. Picked up my fork and had at it, watching the others.

The Overseer sipped his coffee and sat back. He was more tired than he was letting on, and I noticed a slight tremble in his hand.

“So, what aren’t you telling us?” I asked around a mouthful. The new chef kicked ass when it came to desserts. Well, she kicked ass when it came to any of the food we were serving, though I’d go to my grave saying my mum made the best bread known to mankind.

The Overseer considered me, picked up his coffee, and took another drink.

“I could ask you the same question, Mr. Flynn, Mr. Conley, but time is short. Why didn’t you contact me about the Closer’s death?”

Zay had been walking around the table to sit next to Allie. He paused, pivoting just a bit so he faced Victor.

“Who?” he asked quietly.

“Joshua,” Terric answered. “We found Joshua Romero a few hours ago. In a parking garage. Dead.”

Allie put her fork on her plate. “Oh no,” she said. She pressed her fingers over her eyes, holding them there for a minute, then dropping her hands into her lap. When she looked up, she wasn’t crying yet. I could tell that would come later. Instead she had that take-no-prisoners glint in her eye.

That glint always got us in trouble.

Okay: more trouble than usual.

“How?” she asked.

The Overseer glanced at me. Zay took his seat but did not eat the pie. He was looking at me too.

“You do realize I’m not in charge anymore,” I said.

“Fine,” Allie said. “Terric, do you know how he died?”

“Eli Collins,” I said. Allie held her breath and Zay’s eyes pooled with gold. Since Collins was also an ex-boyfriend of Allie’s, and a man who had worked on experimental magic and technology integrations with her very dead, very disturbed father, I understood their reactions. Plus, any memories we’d tried to take away from him had been returned when magic was healed.

“Are you sure?” she asked.

I had a mouthful of pie, so I nodded.

Terric took over. “There are glyphs carved into Joshua. Death, Pain, Binding. It looked like Eli’s signature.”

“I want to see him,” Allie said.

“Allie,” Zay started.

“Don’t need to, love,” I said. “It was Eli’s hand. Swear on it.”

“Will this change your decision?” the Overseer asked.

I didn’t know if he was asking me or them, but I answered, “Not a bit.”

Terric shook his head. “We’re staying.”

Victor was tapping his finger softly on the edge of the table. He might have lost most of his sight, but he had not lost his ability to read people. I figured he had Terric and me pegged. He probably even knew we weren’t planning to wait around for Eli to find us.

Take the fire to the fire, as, really, no one says.

“And you?” the Overseer asked Allie and Zay.

“No,” they said simultaneously.

“We’re staying here,” Zay finished.

Since I was across the table, I think I was the only one who saw Allie’s lips moving ever so slightly with the words Zayvion was saying.

They were probably thinking the same thoughts. Speaking to each other in their minds. Stuck together brain to brain with superelastic Soul Complement glue.

It was creepy.

But they were my friends. My creepy, creepy friends.

“I advise otherwise,” the Overseer said. “I believe you both, well, all of you, would be much safer out of the area. Perhaps out of the United States.”

None of us said anything. I ate another couple bites of pie, then sat back and drank coffee.

Victor’s frown had gone from thoughtful to disappointed. I guess he’d hoped the Overseer could talk sense into Allie and Zay at least. He should know better than that. I’d never seen them do anything but stand their ground.

“Well, that’s settled, then,” Victor said. “Mr. Moretti, I think we’ve heard their final decision on this matter.”

The Overseer pushed away from the table and stood, his fingers resting on the back of his chair. “I wish you’d reconsider, Zayvion and Allison. You have made a very dangerous choice in staying.”

Zay was already on his feet, his hand reaching down to help Allie up.

A wave of hunger rolled through me, seeing them there, heartbeats joined, alive and burning. I wrapped my hand around my coffee cup and sucked the heat out of it.

Control it, Flynn. Zay’s counting on you.

“Thank you for your concern,” Allie said. “But this is our home. We aren’t going to leave it.”

Said the woman who had stood on the front line of the apocalypse and kicked its ass.

“I admire your courage,” the Overseer said. “And I wish you strength. If I can help, please contact me.”

“We will, sir,” Zayvion said. “Thank you.”

The Overseer started toward the door, and Victor followed a little more slowly.

I wanted to talk to Victor. See if he knew how Dessa fit into all this, but my control was damn near exhausted. And Terric was right there, just a few seats away.

Staring at me.

Being around him usually dampened my need to feed. But it wasn’t enough to be in the same room with him right now. What I wanted was life. Allie’s life, Zayvion’s life. Terric’s life.

Terric waited. He knew what I wanted. Knew he could give it to me.

Knew I knew it too. And was waiting for me to ask.

If I asked and triggered the monster in him, one of us would end up dead.

Besides, I’d had enough of walking among the living for the day.

“So that was fun,” I said as soon as the door closed behind Victor and the Overseer. “The four of us, holding out while our doom sets us in its sights. Just like old times. Unlike old times, I plan to be drunk for as much of this as possible. Who’s up for a bottle or two?”

Terric just shook his head and pushed away from the table. “Has either of you talked to Davy lately?”

Allie answered, “Not for a few days. Why? Is he okay?”

“I saw him last night. We saw him,” Terric said. “And he saw Joshua’s body. He knows it’s Eli behind his death.”

Zay took in a deep breath and did that stare-into-space thing for a second. Used to be he could sort of reach out and feel where people were in the city. Back when he was Guardian of the gates. Back when there was enough magic in the world to open and close magical gates. Back when magic was broken, but a hell of a lot easier to deal with. Except, you know, everyone was pretty damn good at using it to kill one another.

Maybe now he was just trying to decide how to talk Allie into going away somewhere safe.

“How did Davy take it?” Allie asked.

Terric shrugged, then rubbed at one shoulder as if it had a kink there. “Pretty sure he wants to be a part of taking Eli down.”

Zay nodded and so did Allie.

“I want to see the glyphs,” Allie said. “Where is the . . . where is Joshua?”

Terric stood, dug his phone out of his pocket. “I took a couple pictures.” He thumbed through the selection, which appeared to be password protected, then handed the phone to Allie.

Zay nodded just slightly in thanks and Terric nodded back.

Allie frowned and adjusted the picture so she could see it the way she wanted.

Let them be all sleuthy. I found a decent bourbon, filled a glass. Took a long, hard swallow.

Burned all the way down.

Eleanor was perched on the edge of the bar, swinging her feet. I was pretty sure she hadn’t taken her eyes off Zayvion since we’d walked in here.

“He’s taken, love,” I said quietly to her. “Plus, he prefers his women breathing.”

She rolled her eyes and very carefully and slowly mouthed the words fuck you.

I shook my head. “I like them breathing too.”

She jumped down off the bar. Then she pushed through it and slapped me across the back of the head. I winced and chuckled into the glass.

“Well,” I said as I refilled the tumbler. “Since you three seem to have some catching up to do, I am going to my room. Call me if you need me. Hold on.” I lifted one finger and navigated out from behind the bar, tumbler and bottle in one hand. “Better yet, don’t call me unless you absolutely must.”

Zay folded his arms across his chest and gave me and my bottle a very disapproving glare as I walked out of the room. Allie just looked sad at my lack of . . . well, probably lack of everything.

That hurt.

I didn’t let it show. “Good night, all. See you on the morn.”

“Shame,” Terric said. “It’s morn right now. It’s not even noon. And you have a date in a couple hours.”

“A date?” Allie asked. “Who?”

“Just a girl I met in a bar,” I said.

“Ex-government,” Terric said. “I’d guess CIA or FBI.”

“I don’t think so,” I interrupted. “She wouldn’t be asking us for information if she was in the intelligence community.”

“There are things we’ve kept out of the government’s hands for years,” he said. “Even the CIA and FBI don’t have the records we have.”

“True.”

“That’s both interesting and worrisome,” Allie said, “but not as interesting as you wanting to date her. How long have you known her?”

“A few hours.”

“Hours?”

“Yes. Which is why I’ll leave you creatures of the light to your day, and get some sleep while I can.” I strolled down the hall, Eleanor not far behind me. Listened to Zay and Allie and Terric. Talking. Talking about me. I tried to ignore their whispers. Shame wasn’t the same. Was worse than they’d ever seen. On the edge of losing control. Of becoming the monster.

They didn’t know how right they were.

Closed myself in my room. Kicked off my boots, while finishing off the tumbler in deep gulps. Trying to drown the hunger, the need. It helped, but not enough.

Pulled off my coat, my shirt. Sat on the edge of my bed, hands and heart shaking.

I was hungry. Hungry to kill.

Eleanor stood across the room, her hands in her ghostly pockets. I lifted the bottle toward her in a toast. Then drank from it. Trying to burn away my need. Trying to dull my sorrow for Joshua. He was a good man. A decent guy. Husband. Father.

Dead.

We’d lost him. To Collins the Cutter. To that heartless bastard.

When I found Eli—and I would—I was going to make him pay for every cut in Joshua’s flesh. For every moment of life he’d stolen from him.

I tipped the bottle up, drank. And drank.

Eleanor finally drifted over. Sat on the edge of my bed next to me. Pointed at the book that had fallen out of my coat pocket and onto the floor.

“Ah, now. I promised, didn’t I?”

She nodded.

I pushed off the bed. Scooped up the book. Got myself sitting again, with my back against the headboard.

I patted the blankets next to me. “Come on. I’m not going to read it to you.”

She tipped her head, and for just a second, she gave me that hopeful glance. The one women tend to give men they think can be saved.

I blinked, slowly, the alcohol taking some of the hard, hungry edges off the world. And waited for her.

She finally drifted up, sat down next to me, her back against the headboard, knees curled up beneath her. She rested her hand on my shoulder and propped her chin there too so she could look down at the book I held. I opened it.

We had a system, Eleanor and I. I’d drink. Hold up the book with one hand so she could see both pages. She’d tap me on the shoulder, and I’d turn the page. Drink again.

We did this until the bottle was gone.

Because the bottle was always gone before the pages were done.