Hitler's war

Chapter Seventeen

Paris in wartime. Alistair Walsh had seen the City of Light in 1918, too. Then, though, it had been pretty clear that the Kaiser’s troops wouldn’t make it this far. Bombers were only nuisances in those fondly remembered days.

Things were different now, not quite twenty-one years later. Maybe 1914 had felt like this: the sense of the field-gray Juggernaut’s car bearing down on the city, with all the people in it wondering whether to run away or to grab what amusement they could before everything disappeared.

British money went a long way in France. Walsh remembered that from the last time around, and it still seemed true. He’d got buzzed at a bar where the fellow serving drinks-a man no more than a couple of years older than he was-had a patch over his left eye and walked with a limp. “You here before, Tommy?” the Frenchman asked in fair English.

“Oh, yes.” Alistair brushed his wounded leg with one hand. “I caught a packet, too-not so bad as yours, but that’s just bloody luck one way or the other.”

“Yes. We could both be dead,” the bartender agreed, handing him his whiskey and soda. “And you-you have another chance.”

“Right.” Walsh didn’t like thinking about that, however true it was. “So do you, pal, come to that. Damned Germans bomb Paris every chance they get.”

The Frenchman called his eastern neighbors several things unlikely to appear in dictionaries. Walsh hadn’t learned a lot of French in his two stays on the Continent, but what he had learned was of that sort. “You bet,” he said, and slid a shilling across the zinc-topped bar. “Here. Buy yourself one, too.”

“Merci.” The barman made the silver coin vanish.

“Damn shame about the Eiffel Tower, too,” Walsh added awkwardly.

“When the top part falls off-fell off-it should fall on the government’s head,” the French veteran said. “Then maybe it do some good. After we beat the Boches, we build it again.”

“There you go.” Alistair started to suggest that the Germans could pay for it, but he swallowed that. Reparations had been nothing but a farce after the last war. Why expect anything better this time around?

“Drink up, mon ami,” the Frenchman said. “You will look for other sport, eh? Night still comes too soon, especially with blackout.”

“Too right it does.” Walsh realized the barman really liked him. Otherwise, the fellow would have tried to keep him in there forever. But the man must have realized he’d do all right from his other customers. Soldiers wearing several different uniforms packed the place. As long as none of them was in German kit…

Walsh had to push through double blackout curtains to get out onto the street. A little light leaked out despite the curtains. A flic blew his whistle and shouted something irate. Since Alistair didn’t understand it, he didn’t have to answer. That was how he felt, anyhow. And it was already dark enough to let him fade into the crowd before the copper could get a good look at him.

He knew where he was going, or thought he did. The house was supposed to be around the corner and a couple of streets up. He figured it would be easy to find even in the dark: places like that always had queues-or, given French carelessness about such things, crowds-of horny soldiers outside waiting their turn for a go with one of the girls.

But he missed it. Maybe he walked past the corner in the gloom, or maybe the place wasn’t where he thought it was. He wandered around, bumping into people and having others bump into him. “Excuse me,” he said, and, “Pardon.” It wasn’t curfew time yet, and Paris kept going regardless of such tiresome regulations.

Cars honked like maniacs as they rattled along. They had headlamps masked with black paper or cloth so only a tiny slit of light came out: with luck, not enough to see from 20,000 feet. The faint glow wasn’t enough to let drivers see much, either. Every so often, the sound of crunching bumpers and frantic cursing punctuated the night.

Another couple of steps and Alistair bumped into somebody else. “Excuse me,” he repeated resignedly.

“Pardon,” said his victim: a woman.

They both stepped forward again, trying to go around each other, and bumped once more. “Bloody hell,” Walsh said. You could be as foul-mouthed as you pleased in a country where most people didn’t know what you were talking about.

But the woman laughed. “I was thinking the same thing,” she said, her English better than the barman’s.

“Sorry,” Alistair mumbled.

“Don’t worry,” she answered. “My husband would say that when he was alive. He was a soldier from the last war.”

“You were married to a Tommy?” Walsh asked.

“That’s right,” she said. “My father was a butcher. My brother got killed at Verdun, and so Fred took over the business. Better than he could have done in England, he always said. But he died five years ago…and now we have war again.”

“Too right we do.” Walsh wondered what the hell to say next. Verdun was gone, lost, this time around, though not with the titanic bloodbath of 1916. He couldn’t very well ask a woman where the maison de tolerance was. He wondered if he could talk her into taking him home with her. If she was used to British soldiers (though he was no damned Englishman-by the way she sounded, her Fred had come from Yorkshire or thereabouts)…

Before he could find anything, she said, “Maybe you should go left at the next corner. It’s not far at all-only a few meters. Good luck, Tommy.” Then she was nothing but fading footsteps on the street: this time, she stepped around him nimbly as a dancer.

Alistair laughed at himself. So she wasn’t a widow who needed consoling-not from him, anyhow. “Too damned bad,” he muttered. “She’d be better than what I could pay for.” And then, thoughtfully, “Left, is it?”

He didn’t think in meters, but he could make sense of them. You had to if you were going to fight on the Continent. He found the corner by stepping off the curb. He didn’t fall on his face, which proved God loved drunks. He didn’t get run over crossing the street, either-no thanks to the French drivers, most of whom tooled along as if they could see for miles, not six inches past their noses if they were lucky.

A long block down the street, he bumped into somebody else. “‘Ere, myte, watch yourself,” growled an unmistakable Cockney.

“Oh, keep your hair on,” Walsh retorted, not only showing he was from Britain himself but suggesting he had the bulge to deal with any ordinary soldier. He paused. He still couldn’t see much, but his ears told him a long file of men stood here breathing and muttering and shuffling their feet. A light went on in his head, even if it illuminated nothing out here. “Is this the queue for-?”

“You fink Oi’d wyte loike this for anyfing else?” the Cockney answered.

“I suppose not,” Walsh said. Fred’s widow knew soldiers, all right, and knew what they’d be looking for. If she knew he also wouldn’t have minded looking for her…well, that was how the cards came down. She might have been better, but this wouldn’t be bad-not while it was going on, anyhow. Later, he’d likely wonder why he wasted his money on some tart who’d forget him as soon as he got off her.

But that would be later. The queue lurched forward a few feet. Somebody joined it behind Alistair, and then somebody else. He wished he could light a cigarette, but that was against the blackout rules, too. One more thing he’d have to wait for. Well, it wouldn’t be long.

* * *

Breakfast at the airstrip was rolls and strong coffee. Hans-Ulrich Rudel longed for milk. By the way a lot of the Stuka pilots and rear gunners went on, they longed for schnapps or whiskey. He didn’t care what they drank, as long as it didn’t hurt what they did in the air. They sassed him unmercifully. He’d got used to that-by all the signs, he was the only teetotaler in the Luftwaffe. He didn’t much like it, but he couldn’t fight everybody all the time.

And then someone said something different to him: “What do you think of the new wing commander?”

“Colonel Steinbrenner?” Rudel shrugged. “He seems like a good enough officer-and I’m sure he’s a good German patriot.”

“Do you think Colonel Greim wasn’t?” asked the other pilot, a new fish. Was he Maxi or Moritz? Moritz, that was it.

Hans-Ulrich shrugged again. “He’d still be in charge of the wing if the powers that be thought he was. Me, I say ‘Heil Hitler!’ and I go about my business. What else can you do?”

Moritz started to say something, stopped, and then tried again: “The war hasn’t gone the way everybody hoped it would when it started.”

“And so?” Rudel gulped coffee. He needed help prying his eyelids open-like most flyers these days, he was chronically short on sleep. And this brew would do the trick, too, which meant it had to come from captured stock. But he could see some things even with his eyes closed. “How many wars do go just the way one side thinks they will beforehand? Do we toss out the Fuhrer because things aren’t perfect?”

“Of course not,” Moritz said quickly.

“Of course not,” Hans-Ulrich agreed. He hadn’t expected his colleague to say anything else. That the other man might not dare say anything else never crossed his mind. He believed in Fuhrer and Party at least as strongly as he believed in his father’s stern Lutheran God. Till the latest political upheavals, he’d assumed everybody else felt the same way. “This foolishness isn’t doing the war effort any good.”

Moritz looked down into his coffee mug. Then he eyed Hans-Ulrich again. “Which foolishness?” he asked quietly. “The coup, or what’s happening now to anybody who might have known anything about it?”

“Why, the coup, of course.” Rudel’s answer was as automatic as the mechanism that pulled a Stuka out of a dive. Only after it came out did he fully realize what the other man had said. “I could report you for that!” he exclaimed. He almost said, I should report you for that!

“Ja. I know,” Moritz answered. “But think first. Would I go up there to get my ass shot off if I weren’t loyal to the Vaterland?”

Nobody without a death wish would fly a Stuka if he weren’t doing it for his country. Even so, Hans-Ulrich said, “You can’t be loyal to the Vaterland if you’re not loyal to the Fuhrer. We’d lose for sure if anyone else tried to run the war, or if we bugged out of it. We’d stab ourselves in the back, the same way we did in 1918.”

“No doubt,” the other pilot said. Was that agreement, or was he just trying to get Hans-Ulrich out of his hair? Hans-Ulrich knew which way he’d bet. He didn’t know what to do next. Anyone who wondered about vengeance was less loyal to the Party and the Fuhrer than he should have been. But if you were a brave pilot, and you hurt the French and British every time you flew…

Rudel was still chewing on that when he headed off to hear Colonel Steinbrenner’s morning briefing with the rest of the pilots. His ankle still hurt, but he could walk on it and use the Stuka’s aileron controls. That was all that counted.

“If we can break through north of Paris, we have them,” Steinbrenner declared. “Then we wheel around behind the city, the way we would have done it in 1914 if von Kluck hadn’t run short of men and turned too soon.”

He was in his forties-old enough to remember von Kluck’s turn, maybe old enough to have been one of the footsloggers who made it and then got hurled back from the Marne. By the way he spoke, he still took it personally a generation later.

“We’ve done better this time than we did in 1914,” he went on. “Thanks to the panzers and to you boys, we’ve got most of the French Channel ports. That makes it harder for England to send men and machines to the Continent. And who’s to thank for the panzers and the Stukas and the rest of our toys? The Fuhrer, that’s who.”

Hans-Ulrich nodded vigorously. So did most of the other men in the wing. He judged that some of them, like him, meant it from the bottom of their hearts. Others wanted to be seen nodding so the new wing commander would have no reason to doubt their loyalty. Whited sepulchers, he thought scornfully. His father had plenty of things to say about parishioners who acted pious in church but behaved like animals as soon as they got outside again.

And a few stubborn souls, Moritz among them, just sat there listening as if Colonel Steinbrenner were going on about the weather. Maybe they had the courage of their convictions. Some men did fight for Voter-land rather than Fuhrer. Rudel didn’t think the two were separable. He was willing to bet Germany’s foes didn’t, either.

After a moment, Steinbrenner resumed: “Your target is Chaumont. There’s a railway viaduct there-it’s more than six hundred meters long, and it crosses the Suize. Artillery hasn’t been able to knock it out, and the enemy keeps sending men and materiel across it. Time to put a stop to that, by God!”

Now everybody nodded. Give the Luftwaffe a purely military problem, and it would handle things just fine. Even Hans-Ulrich was relieved that he wouldn’t have to think about politics while he was flying. If any of the other men felt differently, he would have been very surprised.

Groundcrew men were already bombing up his Stuka and fueling it when he went out to the revetment. Sergeant Dieselhorst was grabbing a premission cigarette a safe distance away. “What’s on the plate?” Dieselhorst asked.

“Chaumont. Railroad bridge,” Hans-Ulrich said.

“Ach, so.” The sergeant’s cheeks hollowed as he took one last drag. He crushed the butt underfoot. “Flak’ll be thick enough to walk on,” he said mournfully. “They know what those bridges are worth.”

“You can always bow out,” Hans-Ulrich said. The rear gunner sent him a reproachful look. Rudel gestured toward the Ju-87. “Well, come on, then. Heil Hitler!”

“Heil!” Dieselhorst echoed. Whatever he thought of the rumored coup, he didn’t say much. He just did his job. That wasn’t the worst attitude for a noncom-or anyone else-to have.

Inside the plane’s cabin, he and Hans-Ulrich went through their preflight checks. Everything came up green. With all the flying the planes were doing, the groundcrews had to work miracles to keep so many of them airborne. So far, the mechanics and armorers seemed up to it.

A groundcrew man spun the prop. Hans-Ulrich fired up the engine. Another groundcrew man sat on the wing to help guide him as he taxied out of the revetment and onto the airstrip’s chewed-up grass. The ground crewman hopped off with a wave. Rudel gave him one, too. When he got the takeoff signal, he gunned the Stuka. It bounced down the runway and lurched into the air. It might not have been pretty, but it flew, all right.

Chaumont wasn’t far on the map, but it was far enough: farther than the Kaiser’s army had ever got. “We have company,” Sergeant Dieselhorst said, distracting Rudel.

He looked around, making sure he’d read the noncom’s tone the right way. Yes, those were Messerschmitts flying with the Stukas, not Hurricanes or French fighters streaking in to attack them. Chaumont was important, then. Flights over France, unlike those across the Channel, didn’t always get escorts laid on.

Hans-Ulrich saw the flak well before he reached the target. It did look thick enough to walk on. Yes, the enemy also knew how important Chaumont was. Hans-Ulrich muttered to himself, but didn’t say anything out loud. He didn’t want Dieselhorst worrying any more than necessary. Worrying as much as proved necessary would likely be bad enough.

Hurricanes streaked at the Stukas maybe a minute and a half later. The 109s zoomed away to meet the British fighters. Hans-Ulrich had seen over England that that was the best way to hold off enemy planes. Sticking too close to the bombers you were escorting gave attackers a big edge.

Sometimes the enemy got through no matter what you did. Sergeant Dieselhorst’s machine gun chattered. Rudel saw a couple of Stukas diving for the deck, hoping to outrun the Hurricanes on their tails. He wished them luck, and feared they’d need it.

He started his own dive for the railroad bridge sooner than he’d intended to, which also meant it had to be shallower. That gave the antiaircraft gunners plenty of time to fire at him. Shells burst all around his Stuka. He hung on to the stick as tight as he could-it was like driving a car on a badly rutted dirt road. Puffs of evil black smoke came closer and closer. A few bits of shrapnel rattled off the plane or tore into it-luckily, only a few.

Trying not to think about anything else, Hans-Ulrich bored in on the bridge. The viaduct had three levels, towering more than fifty meters above the river it overleaped. Some plump, pipe-smoking, mustachioed French engineer of the last century must have been proud of himself for designing it. Rudel yanked at the bomb-release lever. With a little luck, he’d make that Frenchman’s grandchildren unhappy.

As soon as the bombs fell free, the Stuka got faster and friskier. More flak burst behind it, in front of it, all around it. And Sergeant Dieselhorst’s voice rang tinnily through the speaking tube: “You nailed the fucking bridge! It’s going down!”

“Danken Gott dafur!” Rudel said. He sped back toward the east, keeping his gauges at the edge of the red till he was sure he’d made it to German-held territory. If one of the Hurricanes had chosen to chase him, red-lining the gauges wouldn’t have done much good. The Stuka made a fine dive-bomber, but a poor tired donkey in a sprint on the flat.

He got down. To his surprise, Colonel Steinbrenner trotted up before his prop stopped spinning. “Rudel!” the colonel said. “They swore you’d got shot down again. They said nobody could go into that kind of fire and come out the other side in one piece.”

They, whoever they were, hadn’t tried it themselves. Hans-Ulrich shrugged. He hadn’t thought-much-about going down. All he’d thought about was doing his job. Letting the other get in the way would have distracted him. It might have given him cold feet. Now that he’d made it through, he wondered why the devil it hadn’t.

Shrugging again, he said, “I’m here. The bridge is down.”

“There’s an Iron Cross First Class!” Steinbrenner said.

Medals weren’t the biggest thing on Rudel’s mind-nowhere close. He did say, “Make sure Dieselhorst gets one, too. He kept the enemy fighters off my back.”

“He’ll be taken care of,” the wing commander promised. Hans-Ulrich believed him. Back in the last war, enlisted men always got the shitty end of the stick. The Fuhrer understood that-he’d seen it for himself, in four years at the front. He’d sworn things would be different this time around, and he’d meant it. Some of the vons left over from the last round might not like it, but too bad for them.

Hans-Ulrich climbed out of the cockpit. Behind him, Sergeant Dieselhorst was coming out, too. “Made it,” the noncom said with a wry grin.

“Ja.” Hans-Ulrich nodded. “And do you know what we won? Besides the Eisenkreuz, I mean?”

“What’s that?” Dieselhorst asked.

“A chance to have just as much fun again tomorrow, or maybe later on today,” Rudel answered.

The rear gunner and radioman made a wry face. “Hot damn!” he said.

* * *

Joaqu in Delgadillo looked across the Straits of Gibraltar to Africa. That was better than looking at Gibraltar itself. The British had fought like fourteen different kinds of demon to hold on to the Rock. In the end, it didn’t do them a peseta’s worth of good. Spain’s gold and scarlet flew over Gibraltar for the first time in more than two hundred years.

Posters slapped onto walls or fences still standing boasted of the return to Spanish sovereignty. OURS AGAIN! they shouted, and GOOD-BYE TO ENGLAND! Glum British POWs moped behind barbed wire. The people who’d lived in Gibraltar were mostly Spaniards. The ones left alive after the fight seemed just as disheartened as the enemy soldiers. General Sanjurjo’s men were making them sorry they’d backed the Union Jack.

A couple of Condor Legion German airmen walked by, gabbing in their incomprehensible guttural language. Delgadillo wondered why they didn’t choke to death every time they opened their mouths. One of them nodded to him and said, “Buenos dias.” Sound by sound, the words were in Spanish, but no one who heard them would have dreamt they came from a Spaniard’s throat.

“Buenos dias,” Delgadillo answered politely. Even if they did talk as if their mouths were full of glue, they’d done Marshal Sanjurjo a lot of good. German bombers had helped flatten the British defenses here, for instance, and made British battleships keep their distance.

That thought made Joaquin look west instead of south. If the Royal Navy wanted to cause trouble, it still could. And it might: not only to pay Spain back for reclaiming Gibraltar but to keep the Straits open so British and French ships could pass into and out of the Mediterranean.

He’d faced fire from big naval guns before German planes pounded them into silence. If he never had to do that again, he’d light a grateful candle in church. Once was twice too often. They were much, much worse than land-based artillery-and that was more than bad enough.

The Condor Legion men were looking out to sea, too. One of them-not the one who’d spoken before-asked, “Where is your engineering officer?” He spoke better-not well, but better.

Delgadillo pointed north. “That way, about a kilometer and a half. Why do you need him?” He would never have asked that of one of his own officers. Spanish common soldiers didn’t ask their officers anything. They existed to do as they were told. But the Germans were so foreign, so exotic, they might not know that.

Sure enough, this one answered readily enough: “We need spare parts to discuss. Since the big war in Europe began, we have from a shortage of them suffered.”

Why didn’t he put his verbs where they would do him some good? Did he hide them in his own language, too? He must have, or he wouldn’t have done it in Spanish.

“I don’t know if he’ll be able to help you, Senor.” Delgadillo was polite. He didn’t tell the Condor Legion men the engineering officer didn’t have a chance in hell of doing them any good. Lieutenant Lopez tried hard. Sometimes he could come up with a new bolt or a spring for a rifle. He’d done yeoman’s duty repairing the broken axle on a horse-drawn wagon. But he knew no more about airplane parts than a goat knew about the miracle of transubstantiation.

“Well, we will out find. Many thanks. Much obliged,” the German said. He and his pal headed north. A Spaniard, on a mission bound to be futile, would have taken his time. The Germans marched away as if they were on a parade ground. Why anybody would be so diligent without some superior’s eye on him was more than Delgadillo could fathom. He shrugged. The foreigners might be a little bit crazy, but they were good at what they did, and they were on his side.

He looked west again. No British battleships. No smoke in the distance. No enormous shells crashing down like the end of the world. Nothing but one Spanish soldier with the jitters.

Well, no. That wasn’t quite true. A couple of hundred meters away, an officer with enormous, tripod-mounted binoculars scanned the horizon. Delgadillo knew there were observation posts up on the heights of the Rock, too. They could see farther from there.

If the battleships came and those Germans didn’t have their spare parts…What would happen then? The same thing that would happen if there were no airplanes. The ships would pound the stuffing out of Gibraltar.

He laughed at himself. What could he do about it any which way? Jump into the closest foxhole, work his rosary for all it was worth, and pray to the Virgin to keep the guns from blowing him to dogmeat. A common soldier’s life wasn’t easy, but most of the time it was pretty simple.

Any common soldier, no matter whose army he belonged to, learned to look busy, even-often especially-when he wasn’t. Sergeant Carrasquel turned his basilisk stare on Joaquin, but didn’t put him to work. If you had a rag and a brush, you could look as if you were cleaning your rifle. No underofficer ever complained if he caught you doing that. And if you weren’t so diligent as you might have been…well, how could a sergeant tell?

Having successfully evaded any real duty most of the day, Delgadillo queued up for supper with no small feeling of accomplishment. Food on the Rock was pretty good. Not the smallest reason was that much of it came from captured British supplies. The enemy had done his best to destroy what he could before Gibraltar fell, but the Spaniards took the place before he could ruin it all. Joaquin had heard that the Tommies scorned bully beef, but it beat the devil out of going empty.

Pride went before a fall. He got nabbed for kitchen police. Washing and drying and scrubbing weren’t dangerous, but they weren’t any fun, either. Pepe Rivera, the boss cook, was a top sergeant, and an evil-tempered son of a whore, too. No matter what Joaquin did, it wasn’t good enough to suit him.

Delgadillo had just gone to bed when antiaircraft guns woke him up. He grabbed his helmet-a Spanish copy of the German model from the last war-and ran for the closest trench. “God damn the French to hell!” he said as he scrambled down into it.

“He will. He does,” another soldier said. It wasn’t the first time French bombers had crossed from Morocco to hit Gibraltar. They were only nuisance raids-nothing like the pounding the papers said the Germans were giving to London and Paris. But you could get killed in a nuisance raid, too, if you were careless or unlucky.

Bombs whistled down. They exploded, none of them especially close. The drone of aircraft engines overhead faded away. The antiaircraft guns kept hammering for another ten or fifteen minutes. Then they seemed satisfied and shut up.

“Gracias a Dios y su Madre,” Joaquin said, climbing out of the trench. He yawned enormously. Maybe he could grab some sleep at last.

* * *

Out on the streets of Munster, away from any possible microphones, Sarah Goldman said, “I wish we’d get another letter.” Even here, she named no names and gave no details. You never could tell who was listening. If people in Germany had learned anything since 1933, that was it.

Her mother nodded. “So do I. But we were lucky to get one, and Frau Breisach put herself in danger to bring it to us.”

“I know. It was kind of her. Brave of her, too,” Sarah said.

Propaganda posters sprouted like mold on walls and fences and tree trunks. Some showed jut-jawed, blue-eyed men in coal-scuttle helmets: recruiting posters for the Wehrmacht and the Waffen-SS. Sarah didn’t mind those so much. Germany was at war, after all. Father and Saul would have joined if the country had let them. In spite of everything, Saul had joined.

There’d been more Waffen-SS posters lately, especially since the coup against Hitler failed. Sarah didn’t like that, but she didn’t know what she could do about it. No. Actually, she did know. She couldn’t do a thing.

Other posters showed hook-nosed, flabby-lipped Jews pulling the strings on puppets of Chamberlain and Daladier, or a capitalist Jew in a morning coat and top hat shaking hands with a Communist Jew in overalls and a flat cloth cap above a woman’s corpse labeled GERMANY. Still others carried a stark, simple message: THE JEWS ARE OUR MISFORTUNE.

“Why do they hate us so much?” Sarah whispered. The poison made her want to hate herself.

“I only wish I knew,” Mother answered. “Then maybe I could do something about it.” She sighed. Her breath smoked. Spring was supposed to be on the way, but it hadn’t got here yet. “Or maybe knowing wouldn’t make any difference. Sometimes things just are what they are, that’s all.”

“That’s what I was afraid of,” Sarah said. “If it made sense, though…” She shook her head in frustration. “If it had to make sense, the goyim wouldn’t do it.”

“They might. Sometimes people don’t care what they do.” Mother paused, then added, “And look at the name you just called them. If you could, you’d do worse than call them names, wouldn’t you?”

“I wouldn’t start anything,” Sarah said. “But after all they’ve done to us, shouldn’t we get even if we can?”

“An eye for an eye. A tooth for a tooth. And after a while everyone’s blind and nobody has any teeth,” Mother said sadly.

Laborers were still repairing British bomb damage and hauling away rubble one wheelbarrow at a time. The RAF wanted to make sure Germany had no eyes or teeth. Sarah had always thought of herself as a German, at least till the Nazis wouldn’t let her any more, and the enemy bomber crews were trying to kill her, too. All the same, she wouldn’t have shed a tear if one of their bombs blew up Hitler and Hess and Goebbels and Goring.

The laborers paused when Sarah and her mother went by. Sarah felt their eyes on her-and maybe on Mother, too. She tried to pretend the sweaty men in overalls weren’t there: that was one more complication she didn’t need.

And looking at them would have reminded her of Saul working in a gang just like this one…and of his shovel caving in the gang boss’ skull. She wished she could forget she’d ever seen that. She wished she could forget she’d ever heard it, too.

“Hey, sweetheart!” one of the workmen called. He rocked his hips forward and back. His buddies laughed.

Sarah just kept walking. “They don’t know we’re Jews,” she said in a low voice.

“A good thing, too. They’d be worse if they did,” her mother answered. “I keep hearing they’re going to make us put yellow stars on our clothes. Thank God it hasn’t happened yet-that’s all I can say.”

“Like the ghetto in the old days.” Sarah shivered.

“Not quite,” Mother said. Sarah raised a questioning eyebrow. The older woman explained: “In the old days, they wouldn’t have charged us ration points for the cloth we need to make the stars.”

“Where did you hear that?” Sarah’s heart sank. It had the ring of truth: exactly the kind of thing the Nazis, with their often maniacal drive for efficiency, would think of.

“I forget who told me. Maybe I don’t want to remember.” Mother’s face twisted. “It sounds too much like something they’d do.”

“I was thinking the same thing,” Sarah said. “I was hoping you’d tell me I was crazy.” She said verruckt, the proper German term. Back before the Nazis took over, or back at home even now, she would more likely have said meshuggeh. It was a friendlier, more comfortable word. But she didn’t want to speak any Yiddish where Aryans might overhear.

Aryans! Her father had had several instructive things to say on that score. He tore Mein Kampfs claims to little pieces and then stomped on the pieces. He really knew what he was talking about, where the half-educated Hitler cobbled together bits and pieces from pamphlets and political tracts and lying, outdated books he’d read. Hitler reassembled them into his own mosaic, which had precious little connection to real history.

Samuel Goldman was scholar enough to know as much. He could prove it, citing chapter and verse. All of which, of course, did him no good whatever. He wasn’t going to change the Nazis’ minds. Knowing how much of the Party’s antisemitism was built on lie atop lie only gave him a sour stomach and heart palpitations.

With an effort, Sarah dragged her mind away from Father’s frustrations. She had plenty of her own to dwell on. The most immediate came out: “I hope we’ll be able to get what we need. I hope we’ll be able to get anything.”

“Well, we haven’t starved yet,” Mother said, which was true but less than encouraging. With Jews able to shop only as things were about to close, and with their being unwelcome in so many shops anyhow, staying fed and clothed was even harder for them than for their German neighbors.

One clever Jew in Hamburg had given her family’s ration coupons to a gentile friend, who used them to shop for her. The friend could have used the coupons for her own kin, but she hadn’t done that. She’d played square-till someone betrayed them. The Jewish family got it in the neck for evading rationing regulations. And the gentiles got it in the neck for helping Jews.

For all Sarah knew, they had side-by-side bunks in the Dachau camp. Or maybe they’d all been shot. She wouldn’t have been surprised. If you were a German Jew-or an Aryan rash enough to remember you were also a human being-you couldn’t win.

A trolley rattled by. The motorman ignored Sarah and her mother, as they ignored him. Jews weren’t supposed to ride streetcars, either, except going off to the work gangs in the morning or coming back from them at night. No, you couldn’t win.

“I hope our soles will last,” her mother said. Leather and even synthetics for shoe repairs were impossible to come by. Sarah nodded. She hoped her soul would last, too.