CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

ROPER DIDN’T THINK HIS DAY could get any worse. After leaving Amy for what seemed like the last time, he worked out, checked in with his coaches and headed home. He’d taken one look at the houseguests who’d just returned from their tour of the city and he knew he had to send them to be with Amy. She needed them-either for their moral support or to face her frustration with them and send them home. Regardless, it wasn’t his problem. Unfortunately, he still cared enough to want her to have her family around her if she needed them.

An hour later, his doorbell rang and he found himself face-to-face with the last person he expected to see-his brother. As much as he wasn’t in the mood for company, he hadn’t seen Ben in a while.

“What’s up?” Roper asked.

“Can we talk? And before you slam the door in my face, I’m not here to ask you for money, a job or anything else,” his brother said, red-faced.

Curious now, Roper swung the door wide and gestured inside. “Come on in. Can I get you a beer?”

“Why not.”

A few minutes later, they were settled in his living room with the TV blaring eSports Network behind them. “So what’s up?” Roper asked.

Ben shifted in his seat. “A few things. First is, I called some of those contacts you gave me a while back and set up some interviews for assistant coaching jobs.”

Roper couldn’t believe his ears. “That’s great!” He didn’t want to ask what changed Ben’s mind because he didn’t want to ruin this step in the right direction.

“I’ve done some thinking and I’ve been an ass,” Ben said. “Blaming you because my life didn’t work out the way I wanted.” He glanced down, not even chugging his beer the way he usually did. “A couple of the guys said if things work out and I prove myself, the head coaching position might become available. I know it’s because of you but I’ll take the opportunity and try.”

“What’s going on, Ben?” Roper had never seen his brother so subdued.

“There’s something that’s going to hit the news and you need to hear it from me first.”

“Can’t be any worse than doctored porn shots of me and Amy on the Internet,” Roper muttered.

“No, but it relates to it. Turns out my friend Dave, who’d been letting me bunk there until I convinced you to fund the gym, was behind those photographs.”

“What the hell? Why? I don’t even know the guy.”

Ben swallowed hard. “Yeah, well, thanks to me, he thought he knew you. My old, skewed perspective of you.”

“I don’t know what I want to know first. Why your view of me changed or more about Dave and the pictures,” Roper muttered. “I do know I’m going over there and kill him for what he put Amy through.” He flexed and unflexed his hands, anger coursing through his veins.

Ben rose and began pacing the room. “Hear me out first, then you can decide what to do. You know I was jealous of you. You know I thought fate gave me a raw deal and Dave knew it, too. Not only was he my friend, he’s a Renegades season ticket holder, too, and last season’s World Series disaster pissed him off big-time.”

“He wouldn’t be the only one,” Roper said, acknowledging the truth.

“But he was more out of control than I realized. You know those packages you’ve been getting? The letters? The media coverage of you lately, excessive even by New York standards?”

“Yes…” Roper knew where this was going and his head felt full enough to explode. “He’s been behind it all?”

“Anything I heard about you, things I griped about to him, he used against you, bro.” Ben strode to him. “I had no idea. You have to believe me. I was whiny and self-centered, but you’re my brother. I’d never do anything to hurt you. As soon as he told me, it was like this huge lightbulb went off in my head and I realized how messed up my own thinking has been.” Ben pleaded with Roper to understand.

And he tried. Man, Roper tried. Because this was his baby brother and he wanted to believe he’d changed. “Go on.”

“I moved out. Well, he kicked me out, so I moved into Mom’s hotel until she goes back to L.A. But as soon as those photos surfaced, I knew it was Dave.” Ben picked up his beer and took a long swig, then placed the bottle back on the table. “I hadn’t given him back my key, so I let myself into his place while he was at work and checked the laptop. And bingo.”

“He wasn’t bright enough to delete the evidence?” Roper asked in disbelief.

“He’s cocky enough to think he wouldn’t get caught. But he’s wrong.” Ben shoved his hands into his back pockets. “Before I came here, I turned the laptop over to the police. Then I called Buckley and gave him a tip.”

Roper shook his head hard. “You did that for me?”

Ben shrugged. “Maybe I also did it for me. A little redemption, you know? So maybe I could look at myself in the mirror and not hate what I see.”

Roper tried not to wince. For all Ben’s faults, he obviously had a good heart. And Roper knew what it was like to hate yourself at least a little bit. “Ben, it’s okay. I don’t hold what Dave did against you. I appreciate you stepping up to the plate for me. I do.”

“Don’t thank me, at least not yet. There’s one more thing you need to know,” Ben said, looking down as he spoke. He drew a deep breath. “You know how Buckley’s known a lot about you lately? Where you’ve been and who you’ve been with?”

“Yes,” Roper said warily.

“It was me. Mom would mention things in casual conversation and I’d tip off Buckley or gawkerstalker.com,” he said, self-loathing in his voice.

“I’ll be damned.” Amy had been right. It had been someone close to him. He shook his head in disbelief. “Why the hell would you do it? Do you hate me that much?”

His brother shook his head. “No. I thought it was funny at first. And things always seemed to go your way. I thought it would be a lark to see you twist in the wind a little. But I realize now how pathetic that is.”

Roper could have bashed his brother for what he’d done, not just to him, but to Amy. Obviously, though, Ben was doing enough bashing to himself. Roper couldn’t bring himself to tell his brother all was okay, but he wasn’t going to add to his misery.

“What did the police say about the laptop?” he asked, bringing the subject back to Dave and what mattered at the moment.

“They need to go through the computer. Since I had a key, they aren’t going to press charges against me for taking it. And I don’t understand any of the legalities, you know, like whether or not they can use it as evidence. But they’ll see what they find on it and go from there.”

Roper drew a calming breath. He glanced at Ben and tried to see the baby brother he’d always loved. “We’ll have to do the same.” Roper walked over to his brother and threw an arm around his shoulder. “We go on from here,” Roper said.

Ben inclined his head, meeting Roper’s gaze. “I don’t know what to say.”

“Nothing. We’re family and-”

“Hey, isn’t that Amy?” Ben asked, jerking a finger toward the TV.

Roper glanced up, took one look at Amy in the pantsuit she’d worn the day they’d met at Sparks Steak House, and he grabbed the remote control to raise the volume.

He lowered himself onto the couch and watched her, interviewed in the comfort of her own living room by none other than Buckley the Bastard, himself.

“I thought it would be entertaining for my listeners to hear about a day in the life of John Roper from the woman in charge of handling his affairs for the past month,” Buckley said.

“You do have a way with words,” Amy said, shaking her head and laughing. Her curls fell over her shoulder in sensual disarray as she flirted with Buckley.

Roper couldn’t believe his eyes.

“She’s playing him,” Ben said, easing himself back on the couch beside Roper.

“But I appreciate the chance to tell my story,” Amy said.

“She’d better be playing him and not exposing my life for public consumption.” Or his fears and insecurities to a world that already thought he was a washed-up loser. In a few weeks he’d prove them all wrong.

“Relax, man,” Ben said. “I know a con when I see one. Buckley’s so happy to have her talking, he doesn’t realize she’s the one using him.”

“So the pictures that recently surfaced were doctored?” Buckley asked.

“That’s right,” Amy said with certainty. She didn’t even flinch at the subject.

“Can you prove it?”

She shook her head. “Not yet.”

“Rumor has it the police have a lead.” Buckley leaned in close.

Amy shrugged delicately. “I haven’t heard anything about that.”

Roper glanced at his brother. “You stole that laptop. Aren’t you worried?”

“No. In all likelihood, the police can’t use the evidence against Dave. But at least I’ll have planted doubt in the public’s mind about those pictures. It’s the best I can do.”

Roper nodded.

He listened as Buckley questioned Amy about Roper, his habits, his dedication, his talent, trying to trip her up or get her to admit that Roper was more of a player than a dedicated athlete. He failed. Not once did Amy speak in terms other than respectful and in a way that built him up in the public eye.

She was every inch his publicist.

She was every inch the woman he loved.

“I was hoping for some juicier information when I set up this interview,” Buckley said. “So far you haven’t given up anything.”

“I’m a publicist. My job is to be behind the camera, not in front of it.”

“Yet you’re here. You agreed to talk with me.”

“Technically, you conned two elderly women into letting you come here to dig up dirt on John Roper. Isn’t that the truth?” Amy asked.

Without warning, the camera panned to Rose and Darla who waved from the kitchen. Roper figured Amy must have bribed them but good to keep their mouths shut during the interview.

Buckley turned red in the face. “They invited me.”

“Not to worry,” Amy said, patting his hand. “I was happy to get in front of the camera.”

“You were?” Roper asked aloud.

“And why is that?” Buckley asked, clearly looking for a scoop.

“Go ahead, tell them you dumped the infamous John Roper and be done with it,” Roper muttered.

Beside him, Ben chuckled. “Come on, she isn’t going to diss you in front of your home crowd.”

“Thanks to me she’s bare-assed on the Internet.”

“It isn’t really her.”

“Like that matters?” Roper asked.

“As you can see, I come from an outgoing family.” Once again the camera angle widened to include Rose and Darla, who this time hammed it up for the television audience, blowing kisses and calling out the names of friends back in Florida.

Roper winced. He could only imagine Amy’s mortification. And yet she’d put this circus in motion by talking with Buckley. He leaned forward, wanting to hear more.

“But I’ve always shied away from being in the spotlight,” Amy went on to explain.

“Which must make your relationship with Roper an uncomfortable one.”

Roper didn’t miss the satisfaction in the bastard’s voice or the man’s obvious pleasure in knowing Roper was probably watching and squirming. Which he was.

“At first, yes.” Amy glanced down. “You see, I didn’t realize that I was afraid of disappointing someone very special in my life. Someone who’s no longer with us. My father.”

“But what about today? The photos?” Buckley prodded, obviously not willing to let Amy go off on a tangent, even one Roper sensed was of the utmost importance-to him.

“Oh, he’d hate those photos,” Amy said. “But he’d understand how they came into being. Just as I now understand that I idealized the man he was, the things I thought he expected of me. But I realize now my dad was just a man in love with my slightly eccentric mother.”

“That’s me! Darla, she’s talking about me!” Rose squealed.

The camera panned back to Amy’s mother, who blushed and blew kisses.

Roper grinned.

Buckley squirmed in his seat. “But those photos. Even if they aren’t you, which has yet to be proved, they must have made you pretty uncomfortable,” Buckley pushed.

Amy sat up straighter in her seat. “Yes, they did. Especially with my family in town, as you can imagine. But when you love someone, you can’t run away from your fears.”

“What did she just say?” Ben asked.

Roper wasn’t sure. “I need to hear it again.” He raised the volume another notch.

“So how do you like your job at the Hot Zone?” Buckley asked, changing the subject.

“I love my job, although I must admit, I wasn’t as prepared for the media hype as much as I thought. But I’m ready to handle it now, both in my professional and my personal life. In other words, if you’re watching, John, I was wrong. I’m sorry. And I’m ready to fight for us,” she said, grinning as widely as Buckley scowled.

Roper didn’t wait to hear any more. “Hold down the fort, brother. I have someplace important I need to go.”

AMY PACED HER APARTMENT as time passed. Surely Roper had seen the interview or someone had called to tell him about it. So why wasn’t he banging down her door? She’d be breaking down his if she wasn’t afraid of them crossing in the night.

It hadn’t taken long for Buckley to leave once he realized his exclusive, live interview wasn’t going to bash Roper. He and his crew had wrapped up and taken off, leaving Amy alone with her applauding mother and aunt. Of course, they had gotten their own exclusive, realizing Amy had come to her senses about Roper.

Had he seen it? Did he know?

“Mom, you and Aunt Darla need to make yourselves scarce. Go to a movie or something,” Amy said, rifling through her purse for money.

“Don’t worry, we’re leaving. And we won’t be back here tonight,” her mother said pointedly.

“So you and Roper can do whatever you want,” Aunt Darla said. “We’ll end up back at his apartment. Anyway, we have to pack. We have a flight tomorrow early in the afternoon.”

“You do?” Amy turned to her family, surprised. “You didn’t tell me you were going home.” To her surprise, despite the chaos their surprise arrival had brought with them, Amy was sad to see them go.

“We didn’t have definite plans. But after our talk tonight, we realize you need more privacy. We’ll be sure to give you a heads-up before we come next time. At least we can leave knowing that you and Roper are fine,” her mother said.

“You are fine, right?” Aunt Darla asked.

Amy, not wanting to worry them, merely nodded. “It’s all good. Now, go out. Keep busy, behave and we’ll have breakfast before you leave tomorrow. Will that work out timewise?”

“Yes.”

They opened the door to the apartment and bumped into Roper on his way in. Another ten minutes of conversation passed, and by the time she shut the door behind her mother and aunt, nerves took over. Her stomach was in knots, her throat raw and dry.

“So.” She spread her hands out beside her, then clasped them together. “Alone at last.”

He glanced around the empty apartment and grinned. “Very.”

“You saw the interview?”

He nodded. “I did. Shocked the hell out of me to see you in front of the camera talking about yourself.”

“I bet.” She bit down on the inside of her cheek. “I realize I’ve been driving you a little crazy with all the ‘I want you but I can’t be with you’ stuff.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Do tell.”

“I tried to explain it to you through Buckley. I was living up to an idealized version of me I thought my father would have had. That’s why I became a social worker, to make a difference in the world. For him. But it wasn’t really right for me. Working at the retirement home was a blast. I could be myself but I had no social life. When I came to New York and started working for the Hot Zone, I found myself. I love my job. I love organizing and compartmentalizing, strategizing and finding solutions to problems like yours.”

“You do it well. Just look at how you fixed me. So go on. Tell me more.” He needed to hear everything she had to tell him. He wanted to understand what motivated her, her hopes and dreams, her fears and mistakes. He needed to know so they could go forward.

“Well, you know I don’t want to be as out there as my mother. It’s a deep-rooted fear of mine. You’d have the same one if you’d rescued Lady Godiva from jail.”

He nodded. “I suppose I would.”

“But I also don’t want to be so repressed anymore.”

“You’re over it?” The wary tone in his voice told her he didn’t want to live the roller coaster anymore.

Neither did she. “I’m over it. I realized that even if we’d been caught at the lodge, what’s the worst thing that could have happened?”

“I don’t know.”

“Some sleazy photographer could have posted naked pictures of us in the papers or on the Internet. The worst has already happened and I survived,” Amy said. “My family loves me no matter what.”

“I’m sure it helps that it wasn’t really you in those photos.”

“No, but the public thinks it is. I swear to you, I’ve come to terms with who you are and who I am. I know it seems like a fast turnaround, but it makes sense to me now. Almost as if I’ve come full circle today.” She cupped his face in her hands and kissed him hard on the lips. “You need to trust me. Want to know why?”

He inclined his head. “Why?” Roper asked, going along with her.

“Because I love you, John Roper, center fielder for the New York Renegades. I can live with being plastered on the pages of the Post and the News if that’s what it takes to be with you.”

He shook his head, stunned. And yet, at the same time, not really all that surprised. He always knew she had the strength and spunk he’d seen in her other female family members. “Life with you isn’t ever going to be boring.”

She pursed her lips. “I can try for boring. I really can. I’ve done it fairly well at times.”

He stepped close and pulled her into his arms. “I prefer you free-spirited,” he said, kissing her hard on the lips. “Like at the lodge.”

A low purr escaped from the back of her throat. “You know what? I can live with free-spirited,” she said. “As long as I’m only that way with you.” She let her hand slip between them until she cupped his hard erection in her hands.

He groaned, his body needing to escape his jeans. “I missed being able to touch you, how I want and when I want,” he said, running his hands through her hair.

She moved her hand and let their bodies align. “I love you,” she said, meeting his gaze.

“I love you, too. Always.” If this was the best life had to offer, Roper didn’t need another damn thing.

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