Ivanov

Act One

Outdoors at Ivanov’s estate: the house-front with an open window, a terrace, some garden furniture, a suggestion of the garden beyond and an avenue of trees. Evening is drawing in. From the window, the sound of a duet, piano and cello, practising.

Ivanov sits at the table reading a book. Borkin, in high top-boots, with a rifle, appears from the garden. He is tipsy. Catching sight of Ivanov, he tiptoes up to him and, coming alongside him, points the gun at Ivanov’s face.

Ivanov(jumping up) For God’s sake, Misha – what?! – you scared the –! I’m a bag of nerves as it is without you, without your stupid . . .

Borkin(guffaws) Right, right, apologies, sorry.

IvanovYou scared the life out of me and you think it’s funny . . .

Borkin(sits down next to him) Won’t happen again – promise. (Takes off his cap.) Lord, it’s hot. Think of it, dear chap – I’ve covered sixteen versts in three hours, I’m knackered – heart going like the clappers, lend us your hand a minute . . .

Ivanov(reading) I’m reading . . .

BorkinNo, feel my heart –

He takes Ivanov’s hand and puts it to his chest.

Can you feel? Di-dum, di-dum, di-dum, dum-dim – see? Heart disease! I could drop dead any moment. Actually – would you be sorry if I died?

IvanovI’m reading, ask me later.

BorkinSeriously though, would you? If I died would you miss me, Nikolay?

IvanovWill you please stop [bothering me]!

BorkinJust say – would you mind if I –

IvanovWhat I mind is you reeking of vodka.

Borkin(laughs) Do I? I’m amazed. Well, not really. Nothing amazing about it. I ran into the magistrate in town, we knocked back a few or seven or eight. Actually, drinking’s not good for you. It’s bad for you, in fact – wouldn’t you agree? Eh? Bad for you?

IvanovThis really is . . . Can’t you understand you’re driving me [mad]?

BorkinRight, right . . . apologies, sorry again . . .!

He gets up and moves off.

Some people are extraordinary – you’re not even allowed to talk to them.

He returns.

Oh – almost forgot – eighty-two roubles, please.

IvanovWhat eighty-two roubles?

BorkinTomorrow’s wages for the workmen.

IvanovI haven’t got it.

BorkinOh, good. ‘I haven’t got it’! Perhaps you think the men can go without their wages?

IvanovI don’t know what I think. I just haven’t got it. You’ll have to wait till the first of the month.

BorkinWe’re not connecting here – the men aren’t coming for their wages on the first of the month, they’re coming tomorrow [morning].

IvanovWell, what am I supposed to do about it? (Angrily.) And since when do you think you can interrupt me when I’m [reading]?

BorkinLook, I’m only asking – do we give the men their wages or don’t we? Waste of breath. Gentleman farmers! Three thousand acres of scientific agriculture and not a bean to show for it. Like having a wine cellar and no corkscrew. Maybe I’ll just up and sell the troika tomorrow! I sold the oats on the stalk, see if I don’t sell the barley. If you think I’d think twice you’ve got the wrong man.

Shabelsky is heard through the window.

ShabelskyIt’s impossible to play with you! I’ve known stuffed carp with more ear for music.

Anna(appearing at the open window) Who’s that – you, Misha? What are you stamping about for?

BorkinYou’d be stamping about if you had to deal with your cher Maître Nicolas.

AnnaOh – Misha – get them to bring some hay to the croquet lawn.

Borkin(waves his hand dismissively) Kindly don’t bother me now.

AnnaNow don’t get high and mighty – women find it unattractive. Oh Nikolay! – let’s go and do cartwheels in the hay!

IvanovIt can’t be good for you standing at an open window, do go inside, Anyuta darling. (Shouts.) Uncle – close the window!

The window closes.

BorkinAnd another thing – Lebedev’s due his interest the day after tomorrow.

IvanovI know. I’m going over there later – I’ll ask for more time.

BorkinYou’re going when?

Ivanov(looking at his pocket watch) Now – soon –

Borkin(eagerly) Hang on, isn’t it Sasha’s birthday today? Silly me – I almost forgot – what a memory! (Hops about.) Tell you what, I’ll come along with you – (Sings.) I’ll come along with you . . . First a swim, chew some paper, splash on some anti-booze and start off the day again. Mon ange, mon frère, mon petit Nikolay Alekseevich – you’re all jumpy and down in the dumps all the time, always moaning, goodness me – You and me, me and you, what the two of us couldn’t do only the devil could! There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you How about if I marry Marfushka Babakina? Half the dowry is yours. Did I say half? – have the lot!

IvanovDo stop talking rubbish.

BorkinNo, I’m serious, really and truly – Do you want me to marry Marfa? Divvy up the dowry? . . . I don’t know why I bother. (Mimics him.) ’Do stop talking rubbish’! You’re not a bad chap, quite bright, really, but what you need is a bit of get up and go . . . You’re a case, a chronic gloom merchant, which if you weren’t, you could have a million inside a year. Here’s a for instance: Ovsyanov is selling a strip of land on the other bank just opposite, for 2, 300 roubles. If we buy it we’ll own both sides of the river. And if both banks are ours – follow me? – we’d have the right to build a dam. Yes? We start building a mill, and as soon as we tell them we want to make a mill pond, everyone downstream will kick up a fuss and we’ll put it to them straight – kommen Sie hier – if you don’t want the dam, it will cost you. Am I getting through? The Zarevsky factory will be good for five thousand, Korokolkov three thousand, five thousand from the monastery . . .

IvanovThat’s called extortion. If you don’t want a row keep your ideas to yourself.

Borkin(sits down at the table) Of course! I should have known.

Shabelsky comes out of the house with Lvov.

ShabelskyDoctors! – They’re like lawyers, only with doctors when they’ve finished robbing you, you die . . . any doctors present excepted, of course. Bloodsucking quacks. There may be some utopia where exceptions prove the rule, but in my life I must have spent about twenty thousand on doctors and never met one who wasn’t an out-and-out swindler with a licence to practise.

Borkin(resuming, to Ivanov) Yes, tie my hands and sit on your own – that’s why we’re broke.

ShabelskyPresent company excepted, as I say – there could be anomalies . . . (Yawns.) though frankly I doubt it.

Ivanov(closing his book) So, doctor, what’s the verdict?

Lvov(glancing round at the window) No different from this morning – she needs to go south immediately – to the Crimea.

Shabelsky(snorts with laughter) To the Crimea! . . . We should all be doctors! It’s so simple – Madame’s got a tickle in her throat, or coughing for something to do, so grab a sheet of paper and prescribe as follows: take one young doctor, followed by one trip to the Crimea, and in the Crimea, one good-looking Tartar to put the colour in her cheeks . . .

Ivanov(to Shabelsky) Would you stop blathering on! (To Lvov.) To go to the Crimea requires money, and even supposing I find it, she won’t hear of it.

LvovI know.

BorkinI say, Doctor, is Anna Petrovna really as ill as all that? – Crimea and everything?

Lvov(glancing round at the window) Yes, it’s tuberculosis.

BorkinOof! . . . Not good . . . I could see in her face for a while now she’s not long for this world.

LvovPlease keep your voice down – you can be heard indoors.

Borkin(sighing) Life . . .! Life is like a flower in a field – we just have time to come into bloom, then along comes a goat and goodbye flower.

ShabelskyIt’s all nonsense and nothing but nonsense! . . . (Yawns.) Nonsense and humbug . . .

Pause.

BorkinI’ve been telling Nikolay Alekseevich how to make some money. I gave him a wonderful idea, but as ever the powder flashed in the pan. You can’t shift him . . . Look at him – a picture of misery . . . apathetic, worried sick.

Shabelsky(stands up and stretches) You have a fat-headed genius for scheming and telling everybody how to change their lives – but you’ve never once taught me anything – go on, show me how, if you’re so clever – show me the way.

Borkin(moving off) I’m going for a swim . . . Au revoir, gents – I could teach you twenty ways –

Shabelsky(following him) Go on then, show me.

BorkinNothing to it. In your shoes I’d have twenty thousand in a week. (Comes back.) Nikolay Alekseevich, can you give me a rouble?

Ivanov silently hands him the money.

Merci! (To Shabelsky.) You’ve got all the cards in your hand.

Shabelsky(following him) So, what are they?

BorkinIn your place I’d have thirty thousand in a week.

Shabelsky follows Borkin out.

Ivanov(aside) Useless people, useless talk, stupid questions . . . I’m ill with it. I’ve become crotchety, bad-tempered, rude to everyone . . . small-minded . . . I don’t know myself any more. My headaches last for days, I can’t sleep, there’s a buzzing in my ears, and there’s nowhere, absolutely nowhere, I can get away from everything.

LvovI need to have a serious talk with you.

Ivanov(continuing) Nowhere.

LvovAbout your wife. She won’t agree to the Crimea but she’d go if you went with her.

Ivanov turns to Lvov.

IvanovThe cost of both of us going . . . Anyway I can’t get away. I’ve already taken time off this year.

LvovAll right, say you can’t. Next point. The best medicine for TB is complete rest, and your wife doesn’t get a moment’s peace. She’s constantly upset by the way you treat her. Forgive me – I’m upset myself and I have to speak plainly. Your behaviour is killing her. Nikolay Alekseevich – please help me to think better of you.

IvanovIt’s true. It’s all true. I’m terribly to blame no doubt, but my mind is so confused, I’m sick to my soul with a sort of lassitude, I haven’t the energy to make sense of anything. (Glances at the window.) Let’s move off, go for a stroll . . . I wish I could tell you everything from the very beginning but I’d need all night.

They start to move off.

Anna was – is – a rare, remarkable woman. She changed her faith for me, her name – abandoned home and family, gave up her fortune . . . and if I’d asked her for a hundred other sacrifices she’d have made them without a second’s thought. Not like me. I haven’t sacrificed a thing, and there’s nothing remarkable about me. Well, anyway . . . (Ponders.) Well, briefly, I married her because I was madly in love, I swore I would love her for ever, but . . . five years went by, she still loves me but I . . . (Spreads hands in a gesture of helplessness.) And here you are telling me she’ll soon be dead, and I feel no love or pity but only a kind of hollowness. To you it must look awful – I don’t understand what’s happening to me myself . . .

They walk away into the garden.

Shabelsky enters, laughing heartily.

ShabelskyI swear to God, he’s a genius, a virtuoso! They should put up a statue. He’s a walking compendium of contemporary venality – lawyer, doctor, huckster, confidence trickster – (Sits down on the step of the terrace.) And, you know, he never finished school, that’s the extraordinary thing. If only he’d acquired a bit of culture and picked up some science he’d be a master criminal! ‘You, ‘ he says, ‘you could have twenty thousand in a week – you’re holding the ace of trumps, your title: Count!’ (Laughs heartily.) ’Any girl with a dowry would marry you . . . Do you want me to set up Marfa for you?’ he says. ‘What Marfa?’ Oh, of course, it’s that widow whatsername, Babakina, the one who looks like a washerwoman.

Anna opens the window and looks out.

AnnaIs that you, Count?

ShabelskyWhat is it?

Anna laughs.

(With a Jewish accent.) Oy, vy are you laughink?

AnnaI was just remembering what you came out with at dinner. The thief, the lame horse, how did it go?

ShabelskyA Jew baptised, a thief gone straight and a lame horse mended are all worth much of a muchness.

Anna(laughs) Even your little jokes are spiteful. You’re full of spite. (Unsmiling.) No, seriously. Living with you is a bore, it gets one down. You’re always sniping, everyone’s a crook or up to no good. Tell the truth, have you ever had a good word to say for anybody?

ShabelskyWhat is this, a cross-examination?

AnnaIn five years under the same roof I haven’t once heard you speak of anyone without sneering. What have they ever done to you? Do you think you’re better than they are?

ShabelskyNot at all. I’m as big a swine as any swine in a skullcap. I never have a good word for myself either. What am I? I used to be rich, I could do as I liked, I was quite happy . . . and now . . . I’m a leech, a buffoon. If I get angry people just laugh at me. If I laugh, they shake their heads and say the old boy’s past it. That’s when they don’t ignore me.

AnnaThere it goes again.

ShabelskyWhat?

AnnaThat owl . . . screeching, it does it every evening.

ShabelskyWell, let it. It can’t make things any worse. (Stretches himself.) Oh, Anna, if only my lottery number had come up – a hundred thousand, or two hundred . . . I’d have shown you . . . I’d have been out of here, no more of your charity, the Day of Judgement would have come before you caught me back in this hole.

AnnaOh yes? – and what would you have done with the money?

Shabelsky(having thought for a moment) First I’d have gone to Moscow to listen to some gypsy music. Then . . . then straight to Paris, taken an apartment, gone to the services at the Russian church . . .

AnnaAnd then what?

ShabelskyThen sat by my wife’s grave with just my thoughts, day after day . . . sat there till I snuffed it. My wife’s buried in Paris.

Pause.

AnnaWell, that’s cheered us up. Do you want to try another duet?

ShabelskyYes, all right. Go and get some music out.

Anna goes indoors. Ivanov appears in the garden with Lvov.

Ivanov. . . Yes, but you only qualified a year ago, you’re still young – I’m the wrong side of forty, so I’m entitled to give you some advice. Don’t go marrying a Jewess or a neurotic or a woman with a mind. Find yourself a plain, ordinary girl who doesn’t make any unnecessary noise. Settle into a routine, the duller the better. Don’t try to fight the whole world, don’t butt your head against the walls. And stay clear of scientific farming, progressive education, and public speaking. Find a quiet corner and just get on with the task God gave you – it’s more comfortable, more honest and better for your health. Look at my life – I’m worn down by it, worn away by bad decisions, injustice, incompetence – (Catching sight of the Count, he explodes.) Oh, you again! – Why are you always hanging about and getting in the way? It’s impossible to have a private conversation!

Shabelsky(plaintively) Or to find any peace around here, God dammit!

He jumps up and goes into the house.

Ivanov(shouts after him) I’m sorry! – sorry! (To Lvov.) Why did I have to do that? I’m falling apart. I must do something about myself, I really must.

Lvov(agitated) Nikolay Alekseevich, I’ve heard you out and now, forgive me, I’m going to tell you plainly: your voice, your very tone, never mind the words, it’s all so unfeeling. Someone close to you is dying, in fact she’s dying because she’s close to you, and you don’t show her any consideration, all you do is walk around ordering everybody about, throwing fits . . . I don’t know how to put it, but, well, I just find you appalling.

IvanovYes . . . you could be right. You’re in a better position to judge. Quite likely you see me for what I am. (Listens.) It sounds as if the horses have been brought round. I have to go and get changed . . .

He goes towards the house and stops.

You don’t like me, Doctor, and you don’t bother to hide it. I respect you for that.

He goes indoors.

Lvov(aside) Oh, damn my cowardice! I had another chance to tell that charlatan to his face he’s a selfish, despicable hypocrite, and I didn’t take it! I can’t keep my wits when I talk to him – I hardly get a word out before something in here – (Indicates his chest.) – stops my breath. I’m churning inside, my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth . . . There he goes – off out again when his wretched wife’s only comfort is to have him by her – he says he can’t stay – he’s suffocating here, you see, can’t stay in even for one night – he’d put a bullet through his head just to relieve the monotony. Poor devil, he needs his freedom, doesn’t he? – freedom to find another way to torture her. Oh, I know why he goes to Lebedev’s every evening – don’t think I don’t!

Ivanov, in hat and coat, comes out of the house with Shabelsky and Anna.

ShabelskyReally, Nicolas, it’s inhuman of you. We go to bed at eight o’clock out of sheer boredom. It’s monstrous – it’s no life! Why should you be allowed to go out and not us?

AnnaOh, leave him be, let him go.

Ivanov(to Anna) How could you go anyway? – You’re a sick woman, you’re not allowed outdoors after the sun’s gone down. Ask the doctor. You’re not a child, Anyuta, act your age. (To Shabelsky.) And why do you want to go to the Lebedevs?

ShabelskyI’d go to hell on a crocodile – anything rather than stay here. (Shouts.) I’m bored! I’m stupid with boredom! You leave me at home so your bored wife isn’t bored on her own, and I’m boring her to death.

AnnaLeave him alone – let him go if he wants to go and enjoy himself.

IvanovDon’t say that – you know I’m not going there to enjoy myself. I have to talk to them about the money I owe.

AnnaI don’t know why you’re bothering to make excuses. Off you go! No one’s stopping you.

IvanovCan we not squabble like this? There’s no need.

Shabelsky(in a tearful voice) Nicolas, my dear boy, I beg you, take me with you! I just want to give those frauds and fools a look-over, it might even be amusing. I haven’t been out since Easter!

Ivanov(irritated) Oh, come on then! I’m so tired of this.

ShabelskyCan I really? Oh, merci, merci beaucoup. Can I wear your panama?

IvanovAs long as you’re quick.

Shabelsky runs into the house.

I’m sick of the lot of you! Oh God, what an awful thing to say! It’s not how I used to talk to you. I’m sorry, Anna. I won’t be back late.

AnnaKolya . . . please, darling – don’t go out!

Ivanov(agitated) My sweet love, my poor unhappy darling, I implore you, don’t stop me going out in the evenings. I know it’s unfair, but let me anyway! – I can’t bear being here. The moment the sun goes down, I’m in misery. Don’t ask me why. I’ve no idea. Honest to God, I don’t know why. It’s misery at home, misery at the Lebedevs, misery when I get back – and so on all night long – I don’t know what to do.

AnnaThen you might as well stay at home, Kolya. We’ll talk . . . like we used to – have supper together, read . . . That old moaner and I have learned lots of new duets for you . . . (Puts her arms around him.) Do stay!

Pause.

I don’t understand you. You’ve been like this for a whole year now. Why did you change?

IvanovI don’t know . . . I don’t know . . .

AnnaWhy don’t you want me to come with you any more?

IvanovI’ll tell you why if you really want to know. It’s terrible but better said. When I get into one of my states, I begin to stop loving you. I’m in such misery I have to get away even from you. I have to get away from this house.

AnnaI know something about misery, Nikolay. Let me tell you, Kolya – what you have to do is be the way you used to be – sing, laugh, let off steam. Don’t go. We’ll have a laugh, have a drink, we’ll chase away your misery in a minute. Do you want me to sing for you? Or we could go and sit in your den in the dark as we used to and you can tell me all about your misery! There’s such suffering in your eyes! – I’ll look into your eyes and cry and we’ll both feel better. (Laughing and crying.) How does it go? ‘Flowers return with the spring, but happiness lingers behind.’ Is that it? Oh – all right, go then, just go!

IvanovSay a prayer for me, Anya!

He moves off, hesitates.

No, I can’t!

AnnaThen go . . .!

Ivanov leaves. Lvov approaches her.

LvovAnna Petrovna – you must make it a rule: when the clock strikes six you must come indoors and not go out till morning. The evening air is damp, it’s bad for your chest.

AnnaVery good, sir.

LvovI’m serious.

AnnaI don’t want to be serious. (Coughs.)

LvovYou see?

Shabelsky comes out of the house in hat and coat.

ShabelskyWhere’s Nikolay? Are the horses brought round?

He walks quickly over to Anna and kisses her hand.

Good night, light of my life! (Pulls a funny face.) Gevalt! Exscushe pliz.

Shabelsky hurries out.

LvovIdiot!

Pause. Distant sounds of an accordion can be heard.

AnnaHow unfair! Even the coachmen and cooks are having a party over there. I’m not invited to the ball . . . Yevgeny, what are you marching up and down for? Come and sit down.

LvovI can’t sit down.

Pause.

AnnaThey’re playing ‘The Little Finch’. (Sings.) ’Little finch, little finch, where did you go? Tippling vodka out in the snow.’

Pause.

Do you have a mother and father somewhere?

LvovMy father’s dead, but I have a mother.

AnnaDo you miss her?

LvovI have no time to miss people.

Anna(laughs) ’Flowers return with every spring, but happiness lingers behind.’ Who taught me that? . . . Can’t remember . . . It must have been Nikolay. (Listens.) There goes that owl again.

LvovLet it.

AnnaI feel I’ve been swindled by life. Most people no better than I am are happy and haven’t had to pay for it. But I’ve paid for absolutely everything . . . paid all I have . . . and I’m still getting final demands. Oy vay. Do you know any funny stories?

LvovMe? No.

AnnaNikolay knows lots. You know, another thing – I’m beginning to be amazed by how unfair people are. Why don’t they repay love with love? – instead of lies? How long do you think my mother and father are going to go on hating me? They live only a day from here. but I can feel their hatred even in my sleep. And what am I to think of poor Nikolay? He says it’s only in the evenings, when he’s at his lowest, that he stops loving me. I try to understand, I bear it patiently but suppose he stopped loving me altogether? Of course I know he won’t, but suppose suddenly he did? No – no I mustn’t . . . (Sings.) ‘Little finch, little finch, where did you go?’ (Shudders.) I have such terrible thoughts sometimes . . .

LvovExplain something to me – explain how a decent, honest, almost saintly woman like you let herself be taken in for so long, and dragged into this miserable mare’s nest. Why are you here? What have you got in common with that heartless – no, leaving aside your husband, what is a woman like you doing in this dead end among these no-hopers? – Oh, my dear God! – that endlessly droning, decrepit, crazy old count, and that crook Borkin with his ugly face – just explain it to me. Why are you here? How did you get here?

Anna(laughs) That’s just how Nikolay used to sound . . . exactly like that . . . and when he got worked up his eyes would blaze like coals! Go on talking, don’t stop!

Lvov(stands up and makes a dismissive gesture with his hand) What’s there to say? Please go indoors . . .

AnnaYou say Nikolay is this, that, and the other, but how would you know? Can you know all about someone in six months? What you have to understand is that Nikolay is a great man! I’m only sorry you never knew him two or three years ago. Back then, oh, he was so attractive! I fell in love with him the first time I saw him. I took one look and – snap! – I was caught. He said, ‘Let’s run off . . . let’s go!’ I stripped my life away just like you’d strip the dead leaves off a stem, and I went.

Pause.

How different everything has turned out. He disappears off to the Lebedevs to amuse himself with other women, and I . . . sit in the garden listening to the screeching of the owl . . .

The watchman is heard knocking.

Doctor, have you got any brothers?

LvovNo.

Anna starts to sob.

What is it? What’s the matter?

Anna(stands up) I can’t stand this. I’m going over there.

LvovWhere?

AnnaOrder the horses to be harnessed.

She goes towards the house.

LvovYou can’t go . . .

AnnaLeave me alone – it’s none of your business. I can’t . . . I’m going to the Lebedevs. Get the horses brought round . . .

She runs into the house.

Lvov(following her indoors) No, I absolutely refuse to treat anybody under these conditions. Not getting a kopek is one thing but being turned into an emotional wreck . . .! – No, I refuse: I’ve had enough.

End of Act One.