Killing Fear

THIRTY-ONE

Will knocked on Robin’s door after midnight. He’d debated going home, but he wanted to see her. She’d seemed so lost after she learned that the woman helping Theodore Glenn had been in her employ for the past thirteen months.

Mario had left one of his men guarding the door. “Detective,” the man acknowledged.

Robin unbolted the door and let Will in. As soon as she closed and locked it, Will took her in his arms, her body up against the wall. He kissed her as if it were for the last time.

Her arms went around his neck and she pulled him to her, drinking in his embrace as if she hadn’t seen him in years and still loved him.

With Robin, he never wanted to wait, he wanted to make love to her wherever they were, at the drop of a hat. It had been that way since the moment they first met, but he didn’t want their relationship to be built solely on lust. He wanted the connection they’d begun before he blew it, the one he prayed they could find again.

“Robin,” he murmured, pulling back.

“Hmm,” she mumbled, her voice heavy with sleepy desire.

He kissed her neck, so white and long and soft. He felt the vibration of a moan in her larynx, so he kissed her again.

Will picked her up and carried her to her bed.

“The bed? That’s a novel idea,” she teased.

He didn’t smile back. “I blew it with you, Robin. I won’t blow it again.”

Her smile faltered. “And having sex in bed has something to do with that?”

“I want to make love to you.” He kissed her neck again. “I want to show you how much I love you.”

“Will, please-”

“What? What’s wrong?”

“Just kiss me.”

“No.”

She frowned. “What are you doing?”

“I’m not doing anything other than trying to fix what went wrong. I know exactly what you’re doing.”

She tensed beneath his body. “Do you? So smart.”

“You’re pushing me away.”

She literally pushed him off her. “That’s pushing you away, Will. Why are you doing this? Why are you trying to make more of us than there is? Why can’t we just enjoy each other and not talk about all that other stuff?”

“Because what happens between us is important. It’s more than sex. You know it as much as I do. I love you, Robin. You have to listen to me.”

He sat next to her on the bed. She rested her head on her arched knee and looked at him, large green eyes exposing her hope. She was so beautiful, comfortable and sexy in her partial nudity. “I made a mistake by not going after you seven years ago and telling you I was wrong. Look at it from my viewpoint-I saw the M.O., I made a judgment call. I was wrong.”

“You were wrong about me. I told you-”

“I know what you told me, and I should have believed you, but I’m a cop, okay? People lie to me all the time.”

“I’ve never lied to you, Will.”

“Do you love me?”

“What kind of question is that? How can you expect me-?”

“Do you love me? If you’ve never lied to me, answer that question.”

Her bottom lip quivered and Will almost felt bad for pushing her. “Oh, God, I want to, Will.” Tears formed in her eyes.

He gathered her back into his arms. “I want you to love me, Robin. More than anything. I’m not going to let you walk away this time. You mean too much to me. My only regret is that I didn’t see it seven years ago. I was too self-absorbed, too scared that I was falling in love and would screw it up again.”

He brushed back her hair, unable to keep his hands off her. She leaned into his caress. “I gave up the one person who would have made a real difference in my life. The one person who gave me more life, more joy, than anyone else. You’re the first and only woman I’m willing to give up everything for. My job. My friends. My life. I’ll go anywhere to be with you, I’ll do anything to convince you that I want to live my life with you in my bed, at my side, in my heart.

“Seeing you again after seven years of drought-it brought everything into perspective. Being a cop means nothing to me without you.

“So I ask you, Robin. Do you love me? Do you love me like I love you?”

Robin couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. The pain and fear and anguish washed down her cheeks and she wrapped her arms around Will. “I’ve always loved you, Will. From that first night, I’ve loved you.”

She showered him with kisses. “No more apologies,” she whispered in his ear. “No more what-ifs. I’m not going to run anymore.”

They were naked in minutes, taking and giving everything they had, joining in the exquisite moment where you know for certain that the person you love loves you the same way.

After, Will watched Robin sleep. The peace on her face was the same as in his heart. For now, for these quiet hours before dawn, they could forget everything except each other.

But reality intruded much sooner than Will expected.