Love Saves The Day

Perry also smiles down at me and notices where some of the white fur from my chest has rubbed off on the legs of his pants. He laughs and says,ďIt looks like Iíll be taking some of her with me.Ē He bends to put one hand under my nose, and I lean my whole head against it. ďSheís a beauty,Ē he tells Laura.

ďSheís perfect.Ē Lauraís voice is more serious when she says, ďWe almost lost her. Someone was looking out for us.Ē

ďI donít doubt it.Ē Perry stands up straight so that heís looking at Laura again.ďEvery blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, Grow, grow.Ē

Lauraís eyes look shiny, and without warning she reaches out to put her arms around him. ďThank you, Perry,Ē she says in a choked-sounding voice. ďFor everything.Ē

He puts his arms around her, too.ďYou can always call me. If you change your mind about coming back to us, or if thereís anything else you ever need. You know that, right?Ē

Laura takes a step back and nods. Perry kisses her once on the forehead, and then he leaves.

[ ŗūÚŤŪÍŗ: img_3]

Laura has been more tired than usual in the mornings because she doesnít drink coffee anymore. But she seems alert at breakfast this morning when she tells Josh, ďI have a meeting this afternoon with the attorneys representing all the different sides in this thing. Iím hoping weíll be able to start formal negotiations.Ē

Josh looks startled as he puts his cup of coffee down next to his plate of toast.ďAre we at that point already?Ē

ďWell†ÖĒ She rests one hand on the stack of papers she was reading while Josh made his toast. ďI have a complete list from the tenants of every unaddressed maintenance and repair issue. There are about two hundred, actually.Ē She makes a face. ďAnd Iíve noted every statutory regulation that would be violated by the proposed deal between the landlord and the development corporation wanting to buy the property. Mostly because the regulations are so contradictory that nobody could be in compliance withall of them.Ē She rubs the corners of her eyes beneath her reading glasses with the thumb and first finger of her right hand. ďHonestly, I donít know who writes this stuff. Luckily for us, though, all the confusion works in our favor. You said the propertyís been assessed at seven and a half million and that the tenants have raised ten through grants and loans?Ē Josh nods. ďThe development corporationís offering fifteen. Weíll offer eight and try to convince all parties that a prolonged legal battle would be more painful and expensive than the propertyís worth.Ē

Josh pushes his plate of toast away, then puts a piece on the floor so I can lick the butter from its top.ďSo youíre saying this could all be settled today?Ē

Laura makes apfft sound.ďNo. We just want to get the ball rolling and show them how serious we are about fighting this thing. Weíll let the landlord talk us up to ten million if we have to. Hopefully either the development corporation will drop their bid or the landlord will decide itís better to take our ten million now than spend months or years fighting for the development corporationís fifteen.Ē

Josh still looks doubtful.ďWhat about a DHCR hearing? The City paid for ninety-five percent of that building. Technically they get a say in whether or not itís converted out of the Mitchell-Lama program.Ē

ďThey do have the right to a say in it, and as a matter of principle maybe they should exercise that right more often,Ē Laura says. ďBut as a matter of practice, they generally donít. The problem with a hearing is that itís a one-shot, yes-or-no thing. And if our side gets theno, itís game over.Ē She pauses to take a sip from her glass of orange juice. When she starts talking again, her voice is gentle. ďI know you have this romantic idea of a big hearing and cheering crowds, but realistically a compromise is nearly always the best solution. The landlord gets more than the propertyís technically worth, the tenants gain all the rights and privileges of ownership, the community gets to retain affordable housing along with the programs and services the music studio offers. This would be a good thing for everybody.Ē

Josh stands up to dump the rest of his toast in the trash and give me a nibble of cheese from the package on the counter.ďYouíre right,Ē he tells Laura. ďI guess Iíve been working on this so hard for the past few months, itís hard to think of my part in it being over.Ē

Laura looks surprised.ďBut itís not! Itís more important now than ever for you to keep up the pressure on the publicity front. Thatís whatíll convince the landlord he might lose at a hearing if he were to turn us down flat and walk away from the table. Every news camera and article in the paper is one more reason for him to question the strength of his position.Ē

I never knew that a human you actuallyknow could end up on TV. But a week after Anise came over to visit us, there she was on our TV set, along with a bunch of other humans who Josh said were famous musicians. They were in a room with no windows and lots of musical instruments, and Josh and Laura were there, too! They were standing in the background, while a man with a microphone talked to Anise and some other people. Laura and Josh were already home when the show came on, and it was weird to see them here in the room with me and also tiny versions of them on the TV screen at the same time.

After that the phone rang constantly for weeks. People were calling Josh to talk about doing more TV shows and newspaper word-writing about the building, and the people who own the building were calling Laura to talk about what they should do with it. Laura was hardly at home at all those few weeks, because she was always out at meetings with the humans who live there and with other lawyers. Finally one day she came home with the news that the negotiating was over. She was still taking off her coat and hanging it in the front closet when Josh came down the stairs with an anxious look on his face.ďWell?Ē he asked.

ďItís done.Ē Lauraís voice was very serious, and Joshís face went white. ďThe ownerís willing to take nine from the tenantsí association. The developer dropped his bid. The lawyer for the tenantsí association and I have to get some paperwork going to make it official, but†ÖĒ The smile on Lauraís face was wider than just about any smile Iíve ever seen. ďItís over.Ē

Josh made a loudwhoop sound and grabbed her in a hug so big it nearly lifted her off the ground. I donít think Laura likes being lifted off the ground any more than I do, because she almost lost her balance and swatted at Joshís shoulder a couple of times until he put her down. ďWe did it!Ē Josh yelled.

ďYou did it,Ē Laura answered. ďThe tenantsí association did it. I just kind of swooped in at the very end.Ē The way she says this makes me imagine her with a pair of wings, circling in the sky like a pigeon. I donít think thatís what she really means, though, even though itís what she said.

The two of them went to a party that night that the people who live in that building threw to celebrate, and theyíre still celebrating now a week later when Joshís parents and sister come over with the littermates for another special holiday dinner. Josh spent two whole days cooking a huge turkey, and by the time his family gets here I think Iíll go crazy if somebody doesnít give me some of that turkey right away. Itís unbearable to watch Laura and Josh talk to everybody and pour drinks and bring out little plates of smaller foods as if there wasnít awhole turkey sitting in the oven just waiting for someone to eat it! I make it my job to stand in front of the oven and meow at everybody until they remember the most important part of the day. Once everybody is (finally) sitting down to eat, they all go around the table to say what theyíre thankful for. Iím thankful that this time they put some turkey and other foods on a little plate for mebefore everybody sat down.

Thatís when Josh announces that Laura is going to have a baby. I guess that explains why she keeps getting bigger. Iím surprised at how excited Joshís parents are, because it sounds like Laura is only havingone baby. If she were going to have five or six at the same time,that would be a really big deal. But having only one baby at a time is just typical of the inefficient way humans do most things. And itís probably better for me if Lauraís litters are only one baby at a time, because it will be easier for me to teach one baby proper manners than it would be if there were a whole bunch of them.

ďLet me ask you something,Ē Joshís mother says. (Joshís mother likes to begin sentences by saying,Let me ask you something.)ďDo you know yet if itís going to be a boy or a girl?Ē

Laura and Josh smile at each other.ďWeíd like to be surprised,Ē Laura says. ďSometimes surprises are a good thing.Ē

ďIt could be a Martian, so long as itís healthy,Ē Joshís father says. ďYou and I didnít find out until we were in the delivery room,Ē he reminds Joshís mother.

ďYouíve thought of names, though,Ē she insists.

ďA few,Ē Laura answers. ďIf itís a girl, weíd like to name her Sarah.Ē

ďThatís the right thing.Ē Joshís father nods. ďAnd if itís a boy, you can still name him for your mother. Samuel is a fine name you donít hear very often anymore.Ē

ďDad,Ē Joshís sister says, ďIím sure they can pick a name themselves.Ē

ďWe should go through our address book tonight,Ē Joshís mother says to his father. ďIf itís a boy theyíll make a bris. We need to think about who weíd invite.Ē

ďThereís plenty of time for that, Zelda,Ē Joshís father tells her. Winking at Josh, he adds, ďYour motherís looking for an excuse to call everyone she knows with the news.Ē

ďIím just so excited!Ē She stands up and walks around the table to hug Laura. ďListen to me. If you have any questions, or if something doesnít feel right, or if you want someone to go to the doctor with you, you call me or Erica. Weíve had four babies between us.Ē

ďDo you think Prudence will like the new baby?Ē Itís Robert who asks this, putting one hand up in the air. Abbie adds, ďWill she, Uncle Josh? She didnít like us very much when she first met us.Ē

ďThatís true,Ē Joshís mother said. ďSometimes cats and babies donít get along.Ē

Josh laughs.ďI think Prudence is going to love having a baby to boss around.Ē

ďWhat do you think, Prudence?Ē Laura asks. Iím sitting next to my now-empty plate, waiting to get someoneís attention. Itís only polite, at a holiday dinner, to refill somebodyís plate for them once itís empty. Seeing that Laura is looking in my direction, I stalk back into the kitchen and sit in front of the counter where the rest of the turkey is waiting. I can worry about the baby and whether or not I like it when it gets here, but the food you like should always be eaten while itís still in front of you.

The people who live in the building that Josh and Laura saved in Lower East Side donít have to move, but we do. Laura and Josh say that this apartment is too expensive for us to live in while Josh still canít find a job, especially now that Laura is going to work at a smaller law firm that pays her less money. Once this idea made Lauraís face and shoulders knot up with tension whenever she and Josh talked about it. Now she seems happy, though. Weíre moving to a place called Greenpoint, which is in a country called Brooklyn, and Laura says that sheíll be able to come home on time for dinner every night. Our new apartment will have an upstairs and a downstairs, like this one has, but itís at ďground levelĒ with no lobby and no man to open doors. Laura and Josh even say it has a little backyard with a high fence and that I can go outside with them sometimes! Too much change all at once is never ideal, but the thought of staying with Laura and Josh and alsogetting to lie outside in sunlit grass sometimesalmost makes me think thatthis move might be a good thing.

For now, though, weíre all living in a mess, as Laura puts it, throwing lots of things away and packing up whatís left into boxes. Having so many boxes around is by far the best part of moving. Boxes are just about the best place to sleep, because theyíre small and safe and when youíre in a box, you can see whoever is walking up to you before they can see you. My new favorite thing is to crouch down low inside a box and wait for Laura or Josh to walk by, and then leap out at them. Sarah used to pretend to be surprised when I would hide in the big plant and do this to her, but I think Laura and Josh are surprised for real when I spring at them now. Which just goes to show why a box is such a perfect hiding place for a cat. ďItíll be nice when we unpack at the new place and get rid of these once and for all,Ē Josh said last night while I hung on to his left ankle with both paws. I think about how much time Iíve spent in boxesóIíve been in boxes all the time since Iíve been living in Upper West Side. Iíll miss them when theyíre gone. But sometimes you have to put your memory-boxes away, so you can start living your future.

Itís cold outside now, and the pigeons on the roof across the street almost blend into the snow. I wonder if Laura will miss them. She says weíll be living in our new home by New Yearís.

New Yearís is another made-up storyólike hours and minutesóthat humans tell themselves. Years donít begin and end because everybody gets together at the same time and says they do. Yearsreally start when important things happen to you. When youíre born. When you find the human youíre going to live with forever. Your life begins when it becomes important. Like the day when Sarah found me. Iíve been counting my years from that day ever since.

Laura and Josh have brought all the Sarah-boxes downstairs into the living room so we can look through everything and decide what to bring with us and what will be left behind when we go. The Sarah-smell of them fills my nose and goes straight into the part of my mind that still dreams of her sometimes. Laura and Josh are dividing everything into three pilesóa ďyesĒ pile, a ďnoĒ pile, and a ďmaybeĒ pile. Josh put all of Sarahís black disks into the ďyesĒ pile right away. Laura put things like Sarahís address book and bongo drums into the ďnoĒ pile. The matchbook toys and bird-clothes are in the ďmaybeĒ pile. ďI hate to throw them away,Ē Laura says, ďbut itís an awful lot of stuff to take with us.Ē

ďWe could put everything in storage for a while,Ē Josh replies.

Lauraís face is doubtful. ďI guess. Weíll probably need to rent a storage unit anyway. How is it that every time you move, you end up withmore stuff instead of less?Ē

ďI think itís a law of physics that things in closets and boxes expand over time.Ē His voice sounds very serious when he says this, but thereís a grin on his face.

ďSpeaking of things expanding†ÖĒ Laura says, and scoops me out of a box. ďSomebodyís put on weight these past few months.Ē I think how unfair it is for Laura to say anything aboutmy weight whensheís the one whoís getting bigger every day. But her eyes sparkle the way they do when she thinks something is funny, so probably she isnít really trying to insult me. She puts me on top of a stack of black disks, which surprises me because Sarahnever let me touch her black disks. Josh looks surprised, too. But Laura just laughs and says,ďWell, Prudenceis coming with us, isnít she?Ē

The stiff cardboard holders the black disks are kept in feel cool and smooth beneath my belly, and Iím happy to lie here for a while. Suddenly Josh jumps up and says, ďI almost forgot!Ē I hear his footsteps going up the stairs, and then he comes back down holding the Love Saves the Day bag. ďI put this in my room after I found Prudence shredding everything in it one day.Ē

Shredding! I remember that day. It was one of my first few days living here, and I just wanted a comfortable place to fall asleep with my memories of Sarah!

I try to fix Josh with my best indignant stare, but heís already sitting on the floor with his arms in the bag. ďI think this is just old newspapers and stuff,Ē he tells Laura, and puts the bag in the ďnoĒ pile. But I remember, now, that I found something else in the Love Saves the Day bag that day. Leaping from the pile of black disks, I dive into the bag headfirst and start pulling out all the old newspapers. (This is where having ďextraĒ toes comes in handy.) Laura and Josh are laughing as more and more of me disappears into the bag, but when I get to the metal box in the bottomóthe one Sarah took my red collar from the day she gave it to meóitís too heavy for me to pry out. I pull and pull at it, my back straining so hard that it arches up and almost rips the thick paper of the bag.

Laura finally notices what Iím doing and reaches into the bag to help me. When her hand and my head come back out, sheís holding the box. Itís crushed and dented, and I remember how difficult it was even for Sarah to open it. I canít see Lauraís expression, because sheís looking down, but she holds the box in her hands and turns it over and over for what seems like a long time.

ďWhat is that?Ē Josh asks.

ďThis is from our old apartment.Ē Lauraís voice is hushed. ďI always assumed it was lost the day they tore it down.Ē

ďDo you know whatís in it?Ē Josh looks curious and then concerned when it takes Laura a few moments to answer.

ďNot really.Ē Sheís still turning the box around in her hands, looking for a way to open it. ďHow did she even get this back?Ē

ďIt looks like itís been through a war,Ē Josh says. ďLet me get a hammer from the toolbox and see if we can pry it open.Ē

ďI think I can get it.Ē Laura slides a finger into a tiny gap between the crushed lid of the box and its body, using her other hand to flip up the latch that holds it closed. She strains against it for a moment, and just when Josh is reaching over to help her, the box flies open. Lauraís hands shake as she starts pulling things out. There are some red satin ribbons, and an old, balled-up T-shirt with a funny picture of a fake ear with black disks hanging from it and word-writing across the top. Laura says the word-writing spells EAR WAX RECORDS. There are also photos of a very young-looking Sarah standing next to a man who looks a little like Laura. Sarah is holding a baby and smiling at us. In another picture thatís creased, like itís been folded in half, a young-looking Laura is hugging an old, old man.

Josh has moved over so that heís sitting behind Laura now, looking over her shoulder as she finds a small velvet bag that holds a plain gold ring. ďThis was my motherís wedding ring.Ē Laura looks up at Josh. ďI donít think she ever got over my father. She never dated. And every year on their anniversary, sheíd pull out old records and listen to Ďtheirí songs.Ē

Josh puts his arms around her.ďThatís the trouble with romantics. Once they fall in love, itís for life.Ē But he doesnít look like he really thinks this is ďtrouble,Ē as he kisses the top of Lauraís head.

The last thing in the box is a small plastic rectangle with two holes punched into either side.ďA cassette,Ē Josh says. ďWhatís on it?Ē

ďI†Ö†Iím not sure.Ē Laura lifts it from the box and looks at the front and back of it, but thereís no word-writing on it. ďShe made so many mix tapes back in her DJ days. This could be one of them, or†ÖĒ

She doesnít finish the sentence, so Josh says, ďLet me get my cassette player. Itís in my office.Ē Josh runs to the stairs again, and I hear the sound of things being moved around above our heads in Home Office before Josh comes running back down holding what looks like a black radio with a window on the front of it. Itís dusty, as if it hasnít been used for a long time. He presses a button to make the window open and, taking the tape from Lauraís hand, drops it inside.

First thereís a sound like a longsssssssss. Then music starts playing. A voice that sounds like Sarah except a little higher says,Are you ready? A little girlís voice says,But I canít sing as good as you do. Sarahís voice says,Weíll sing together. Just try.

ďOh my God.Ē Lauraís voice is a whisper, and one hand rises to cover her mouth. ďWe made this together, at Alphaville Studios. I was only a few years old.Ē

Sarahís voice hums a little, like sheís trying to show this younger Laura what the tune should sound like. Then both of their voices sing:

Winter is over

Gone is the snow

Everythingís bright

And all aglow†Ö

Hearing Sarahís voice now is like being there again the day we found each other. Sarahís singing was my first beautiful thing, the thing that all the other beautiful things in our life together came from. Itís the sound of cold nights cuddled up under the covers together and sunlight shining butter-gold on Sarahís hair through the windows, and the hand that used to stroke my back when something frightened me. Itís the sound of feet-shoes coming up the stairs at the time of day when I knew Sarah was coming home and Iíd wait for her in that little ceramic bowl by the door. Itís the sound of Sarahís voice saying,Whoís my love? Whoís my little love? and knowing the answer to that question even though I couldnít say it to her in human words. My first beautiful thing. Itís here in this different apartment in a whole different country.

I know now what Sarah meant when she said that if you remember someone, theyíll always be with you. Sarah is here with us now. As I listen to her sing, I know that she never left.

The water that fills Lauraís eyes makes them look darker, until theyíre the same color as Sarahís eyes were. When her hands rise again to cover her whole face and her shoulders begin to shake, I know itís because this is the same for her as it is for me. Sarahís voice was Lauraís first beautiful thing, too.

Itís the sound of Laura sobbing that makes Josh and me go over to her at the same time. Joshís arms go around her again and I crawl into her lap. Itís harder for me to get comfortable there than it used to be, because her belly has gotten bigger, but I press my forehead against her chest anywayand purr as fiercely as I can. ďLook,Ē Josh whispers. ďI think Prudence remembers, too.Ē

The three of us sit together like that until Lauraís shoulders stop shaking and one hand falls to stroke the top of my head. In the light from the window, I think again how much Lauraís hands look like Sarahís. Outside, on the rooftop across the street, the white and amber pigeons huddle together against the cold air and prepare to take flight. One after the other they throw themselves into the sky. Soon, though, theyíll flutter back down again and return to the place they know is home.