Minutes to Burn

Chapter 39

28 Dec 07

MISSION DAY 4

Cameron shot from sleep, her body drenched with sweat. She ran from her tent, awash in nausea. Derek called after her, but she did-n't stop until she was clear of base camp, falling, her knees pressing in the dewy grass, and then she was heaving, hard and heavy, bringing nothing up.

Derek was two steps out of the tent when Justin passed him, running for his wife. Szabla poked her head through the flap behind Justin. "What the fuck's going on?" she shouted.

Justin caught up to Cameron, crouching before her. He rested a hand on her shoulder, but she shook it off.

"I'm fine," she said. Between gasps, she wiped her mouth, leaving a smear of dirt across her chin. Sweat darkened her blond hair along the temples.

The others were out of their tents now a good distance behind them, mulling around and glancing over at them. Diego had set up the radio again and was clicking his way through an SOS.

"Morning sickness?" Justin asked.

The grass felt slick and cool beneath her hands. "Where am I without this?"

"Without what?"

She gestured blindly behind her at the base camp. "I never realized how much I need it," she said. "Orders, mission objectives, chain of command. Heat-'n-Serve priorities. They keep things simple. You do your job, and that's all you have to focus on. No mess." She pushed her-self back into a sitting position and spit out a gob of saliva. Justin waited for her to catch her breath.

"The teams have always kept things neat for me. Kept them in control. Locked away behind a starched uniform." She laughed, a short stutter that died quickly away. Off behind them, she could hear Tank taking a leak against a tree. "I'm an adult, and I hardly know how to think for myself."

Justin rested a hand on her cheek and she let him.

When she spoke again, her voice was soft with fear. "How can I have a baby if I don't even know how to think for myself?" She shook her head. "I can't. I can't have this baby."

Justin brushed a wisp of hair off her forehead. He leaned forward to kiss her, but she pulled away.

"Doesn't this upset you?" she asked, her eyes fierce and daring.

Justin swallowed hard. "Only one thing upsets me."

"What's that?" Cameron said.

He rose, letting his hands slap to his thighs. "That you never asked what I wanted."