Epilogue Give Me the Dimples

Cabe Delgado waited while the garage door opened then he pulled his Camaro in beside Gwen’s Mustang. He parked, grabbed his workout bag from the seat beside him and folded out of the car.

He walked in front of the Mustang and saw the Expedition sitting on the other side of the ‘Stang. Gwen called it the “station wagon” and hated driving it because it was so huge. However Hawk had a rule. She had their boys in the car with her, she was in the Expedition. She was off on her own, she could take the Mustang. She gave him lip, told him he was too damned bossy but only because that was what she did. She knew the Expedition was safer and Gwen would do anything to keep her boys safe.

He walked in front of the Expedition, through the door that led into the house and dumped his bag in the utility room on his way to the huge, open plan kitchen. She’d left the under the counter lights on for him. He moved through the space and turned off the lights, heading to the wide, carpeted staircase that had a nightlight lit in an outlet halfway up. He didn’t need her to light his way but she did it anyway partially because, if one of the boys got up, she wanted them to have light and partially because, when her man got home she wanted him to know she was thinking about him.

He’d lied to Gwen although he didn’t know it at the time. He needed space. Or, more accurately, he needed a Hawk and Gwen zone, he needed to give his boys their zones and they all needed a family zone. So he’d moved his family from Gwen’s farmhouse to this five bedroom, three car garage “monstrosity” as Gwen called it. She only allowed the move because it came with Janine cleaning it. She said she had a life rule and that rule was that she refused to live in a house that it took longer than two hours to clean. Now she lived in a house that took longer than two hours to clean, Hawk just made it so she didn’t have to clean it.

He silently climbed the staircase, turned right and moved through the large open space at the top, one of the many family zones. He didn’t see the pictures but he knew they were there. Gwen decorated in photos. She wasn’t a knick knack sort of woman, thank fuck.

Hawk liked the way his wife decorated. There were pictures everywhere, on every surface, on all the walls, hell, you could barely see the fridge for the photos tacked to it. There were pictures of her, of him, of their two boys, their families, their friends – alone, in pairs, in huddles, all candid, nothing posed, nearly every photo everyone was smiling.

Or laughing.

And there were pictures of Simone and Sophie. Gwen had conspired with his mother and made certain Simone and Sophie had their places amongst her décor and his woman decorated in family.

It took awhile to get used to this, it took awhile for the pain of seeing them every day to dull. Then it dulled. Then he saw what was in the photos instead of felt the loss of it. And what was in the photos were memories. Those memories were bittersweet but, with time, and with Gwen’s guidance, the sweet outweighed the bitter.

Hawk turned right again at the first door.

He walked in and saw Asher asleep in his bed on his belly wearing loose shorts and a t-shirt, his black hair a mess, his limbs splayed, taking up more space than any four year old kid should in a double bed. The covers had been kicked off. Even as a baby, he’d kicked off his covers. Ash liked to be free. No restraints. Even in sleep. Hawk’s Mom said he’d done the same thing and Hawk learned not to be surprised at this.

Asher was his boy in more ways than one. Ash was intense, always had been from nearly the instant he left Gwen’s womb. And if Hawk was home, Asher was with him. From the second he could crawl, when Hawk opened the door to the house, Asher would be sitting on his ass, staring at the door, waiting for his Dad to walk in. It wasn’t clingy. Even as an infant, Asher had been able to entertain himself.

He just liked to do it close to his Dad.

Hawk walked to him and bent, doing what he did frequently, in fact every night he got home when his boys were asleep. He rested his hand light on the heat of his son’s back and felt him breathe. Once his son’s life communicated itself through Hawk’s hand, he lifted that hand and slid it over Asher’s thick hair. Then he left the room, crossed the hall and entered another door.

Bruno was on his back, one arm thrown wide, one knee up and dropped, the other leg straight, hand on his belly. Covers half-on, half-off. The stuffed bear with an ill-fitting Broncos t-shirt had fallen from his outstretched hand.

Bruno sat quietly on his Granddad’s lap during every Broncos home game. It was fucking uncanny but Hawk could swear his two year old son’s study of the game was more intense than Bax’s. Even if a game was on TV, Bruno would stop, sit his ass down and stare at it. If he was awake, he was wearing a football helmet and if Hawk or Gwen tried to take it off him, the kid pitched one helluva fit. So they let him wear it everywhere but to the dinner table and to bed. This was a good call considering when Bruno wasn’t eating, watching football on television or wrestling with his brother, he was tackling shit.

Hawk bent, his hand going to Bruno’s chest, resting lightly and his eyes roamed his son’s face as his hand felt his son’s heartbeat.

Both his boys looked like him, black hair, black eyes. Bruno got his dimples and Gwen praised the Lord loudly, and hilariously, that he did and she did this often. Nearly every time she saw them which was a lot. Bruno, like his Mom, liked to laugh and, like his Mom, he did it often.

At that memory, Hawk smiled at his son.

His wife liked her husband’s dimples. Hawk just liked his son’s.

He walked out of the room and his cell went. He headed to the master suite pulling it out of a pocket of his cargoes. He turned the display to face him and his brows knit.

It said “Gwen Calling”.

He didn’t answer as his eyes went to their door, seeing weak light coming from under it.

She was awake. This was surprising. It was late.

Fuck.

She was nearly nine months pregnant with their, what Gwen decreed, final child. She’d decreed this because the ultrasound showed it was a boy. She was done. Giving up the ghost. She had a lifetime ahead of her of fights, blood, drunkenness, puke and pregnancy scares. She wasn’t going to make it worse.

This was why he let her name their kids. Deacon was gestating in her belly. Hawk didn’t like the name Asher until Asher made it into the world. He really didn’t like the name Bruno until he met Bruno. And he seriously didn’t like the name Deacon but he reckoned he’d grow to like it.

His mother had a hand in these names but Hawk didn’t complain. He saw the signs with Asher’s intensity and Bruno tackling everything. Gwen was fucked.

He shoved the still ringing phone in his pocket as he twisted the knob and opened one of the double doors to the master suite.

Hawk walked through and stopped dead.

The bedside light on Gwen’s side was on. The covers thrown back. The bed empty. A pool of blood was in the bed, a trail of it leading to the bathroom.

“Cabe, honey, you get this, go to the hospital.” He heard his wife’s voice, jerked out of his freeze and ran to the bathroom. “Something’s wrong. I’m calling…”

She stopped talking when he hit the bathroom and her head came up to look at him. She was sitting in her nightshirt on the floor, one arm around her swollen belly, one shapely leg straight, the other bent under her, her long, thick, blonde hair down and tousled, her blue eyes pained, her gorgeous face ashen, blood pooling around her on the black and white tiles.

The minute they hit him, her eyes filled with tears, she dropped her hand and it fell limply to her lap while she whispered, “Baby.”

Less than five minutes later, Cabe “Hawk” Delgado had his wife strapped into the Expedition, his sons safely secured in the back, his phone ringing to Bax at his ear and he was backing out of the garage on his way to the hospital.

* * *

“Son,” Hawk heard and he tore his eyes from the window to look into Baxter Kidd’s. The minute their eyes locked, Bax flinched so Hawk knew what he was feeling was written on his face.

Bax’s hand came up and his fingers curled on Hawk’s shoulder.

“This happened with Libby,” he said quietly. “Same thing, Cabe. Same exact thing. I didn’t say anything, Ash and Bruno were so easy, I thought…” He stopped, closed his eyes, sucked in an audible breath, opened his eyes and went on. “Libby was fine. Gwen was fine. And now, Gwen and Deacon are gonna be fine.”

Hawk nodded once and looked back out the window. Bax’s fingers gave him a squeeze, disappeared and then Hawk felt his presence move away.

Meredith and his mother had tried to get Hawk to agree to Tracy taking the boys away but Hawk refused to allow it. It might be the wrong decision but he didn’t give a fuck. They weren’t taking his boys from him. He needed his boys close.

The doctor had examined Gwen for about five seconds before he started barking orders, they urgently yanked her gurney out of the bay and rushed her down the hall. Gwen hadn’t uttered a word but her eyes never left him until they had no choice because she’d lost sight of him. They’d forced Hawk out of the bay and to the waiting room where Meredith and Bax were waiting with Ash and Bruno.

It had been two hours since they’d wheeled his wife away. His mother and father showed, Von and Lucia, Jury and his wife Gloria, Tracy and her husband Uri, Cam and Leo, Elvira and her man Malik, Troy and his wife Keeley, Mrs. Mayhew – but they heard no more.

Not a fucking word.

Hawk’s gaze was at the window but all he saw were Gwen’s frightened, pain-filled eyes locked to his.

He closed his eyes and shit collided in his brain.

Gwen’s body pressed to his, the silk of her dress under his hand, her smiling lips on his, her mouth tasting of frosting, her laughter sliding down his throat after they’d cut their wedding cake and shared bites. She’d pulled half an inch away and looked into his eyes before assuring him, “Don’t worry, baby, that little piece of cake won’t give you a gut.” After which he yanked her right back and kissed her so hard and so long, their audience started catcalling, hooting and he heard Elvira threaten to throw cold water on them.

Gwen walking out of the bathroom when they were on vacation in Bermuda. The windows open, a breeze blowing the thin curtains in, the sounds of the ocean filling the room. She had her hands behind her back and was wearing a little, sexy nightgown, a smile playing at her mouth. He’d watched her as she’d come to the side of the bed, climbed in and straddled him then whipped her hand around and showed him the white stick with a pink plus sign on it. Then she’d tossed it to the floor, plastered her soft torso to his frozen one, framed his face in her hands and announced through a grin, “If it’s a boy, Maria and I have decided on Asher. If it’s a girl, you get to name her.” When she was done speaking, his arms went around her, he rolled her to her back and kept her occupied for the next two hours so she could say nothing more than moaning her sweet, “Baby.”

Coming home late to see Gwen in Simone’s chair, her legs thrown over the side, her head rolled on the back, Ash cradled safe in her arms, both his boy and his woman asleep and neither had woken when he carried them in turns to their beds.

Gwen, her belly slightly rounded with Bruno (but she was still in spiked heels), wandering The Monstrosity while Hawk, Ash at his hip, and the real estate agent watched. Then she’d walked to him, put her hand to his abs and proclaimed on a complete exaggeration, “This monstrosity is bigger than your lair.” He’d hooked her around the neck, pulled her deep into his body, kissed her hard while Ash banged them both with tiny baby fists and when he lifted his head, he kept her close but looked at the agent and stated, “We’ll take it.”

Watching Gwen cross her legs in his Camaro while she fixed her lip gloss, staring into the mirror on the sun visor and muttering, “I think I love Meredith and Dad’s anniversary more than they do.” To which Hawk had teased, “Because it gives you an excuse to wear expensive shoes?” And Gwen had turned her head, he felt her eyes hitting his face and she’d replied, “No, because it’s also the anniversary of when you told me you love me which was, and even with all the beauty you’ve given me in between, it still is the best day of my life, Cabe ‘Hawk’ Delgado.” And Hawk had had to stop the car so he could kiss her which meant she again had to fix her lip gloss.

He’d lived a nightmare for eight years, closing off the world and refusing to feel anything only to walk up to a goddamned restaurant and through a window see the woman of his dreams wearing a sexy, little black dress and laughing with abandon. Then he’d fucked around for a year and a half. A year and a half. Every night he left her he told himself he’d never go back and then every night he fought going back until he couldn’t fight it anymore and he had to taste her, touch her, hear her soft, sweet voice whisper “baby”, feel her limbs hold him tight after he made her come, feel her eyes on him while he dressed and struggled with climbing right back into her bed and holding her close until he could see the sun shine on her beautiful face.

He’d had her in his arms and he had no idea he was in her heart and he’d denied she’d touched his for a year and a fucking half.

He’d never get that back and now he knew exactly what he’d been missing and he’d never fucking get that back.

“Mr. Delgado?” he heard and he opened his eyes to turn and see a doctor in scrubs walking into the room.

Everyone but Tracy and Elvira stood. Tracy because she was cradling a sleeping Ash, Elvira because she was doing the same with Bruno.

Hawk didn’t move as he watched Dr. Hunter walk to him and he still didn’t move even when he saw the man’s smile.

“Your wife is fine,” Hunter stated then stopped a foot from Hawk before he finished, “As is your baby girl.”

“A girl?” Hawk heard his mother cry as he heard other noises of relief and joy.

He just stared at Hunter and demanded, “I want to see my wife.”

“Of course,” Hunter nodded. “She’s sleeping,” he went on to warn.

“I want to see my wife,” Hawk repeated.

Hunter nodded again. “Follow me.”

Hawk’s eyes scanned his sleeping sons but didn’t move to anyone else in the room as he followed the doctor.

* * *

He saw it the minute her eyes opened.

She looked confused a moment then his hand in hers squeezed and her head turned on the pillow.

“Cabe, baby,” she whispered.

He felt her words like a physical touch.

Then he felt her hand squeeze his and his thumb slipped, brushing across her wedding rings.

He closed his eyes.

Thank Christ. Thank fucking Christ.

Hawk opened his eyes. “We’re namin’ her Genevieve.”

He watched her eyes grow round.

“Genevieve?” she whispered.

“Yeah,” he whispered back.

She stared at him. Then, still whispering, she declared, “Vivi.”

“Whatever,” Hawk muttered.

Gwen smiled at him and, seeing it, his hand automatically tightened around hers.

Thank. Fucking. Christ.

“No more kids,” he proclaimed.

“’Kay,” she agreed softly.

He got up from the chair but stayed bent so his face was close to hers.

Then he admitted, “You scared the shit outta me, Sweet Pea.”

Her eyes got soft and her face gentled. He’d surprised her in a way she liked.

Fuck, but he loved that look and he didn’t love it any less no matter how often he saw it, which was often considering he worked hard to earn it.

“Superheroes don’t get scared,” she told him and for the first time in hours, he felt his mouth smile. She smiled back. Then she asked, “Where are my boys?”

“Sleepin’ in the waiting room.”

“Can they come in?”

“Don’t care, you want ‘em, I’ll go get ‘em.”

“I want them,” she whispered.

“You got it, babe,” Hawk whispered back, bent closer and touched his mouth to hers.

When he pulled away her hand got tighter so he stopped and caught her eyes.

“We have a little girl,” she said softly.

“Yeah,” he replied just as soft.

“Can I see her?”

“I’ll bring her too.”

Gwen nodded and studied his face for awhile.

Then she asked quietly, “What am I going to do?”

“What?”

“I don’t have anything else to daydream about. Now what am I going to do?”

Hawk felt his gut get tight, his chest swell and something stung his throat.

“I’ll find a way to keep you occupied, baby,” he whispered.

“’Kay,” she whispered back.

His hand again tightened in hers and his other hand lifted so he could run his knuckles down her pale cheek and when he did, her eyes closed.

“Love you, Sweet Pea,” he murmured and her eyes opened.

She smiled then she replied, “Love you too, baby.” He started to pull away again but she called his name so he stopped.

“Yeah?”

“Before you go, give me the dimples,” she demanded.

That thing in his throat prickled and Hawk dipped his head and kissed the indentation at the base of his wife’s throat. Then he lifted his head and smiled at her.

Her hand came to his face and he felt the pad of her thumb in one of his dimples.

Then her eyes moved from her thumb to his and she smiled back.

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