Nine Lives To Die

“Father, I appreciate the time you have given me.” Cooper smiled as she spoke, although Father O’Connor knew the police officer was in his office for a reason.

Flummoxed for a moment, the priest queried, “You’re here about the torn check, I assume.”

“With any luck, Father, we might lift a print when the check is reconstructed. I mean, other than Arden’s or Jessica’s.”

“Yes. Yes. We can hope.” His eyebrows knitted together.

“If there is one, our team will find it, but real police work isn’t necessarily like TV. Rarely do we get an instant answer or shall I say person of interest in a case like this. This will take time, and much of it painstaking,” she honestly reported. “Let me ask you, have you ever noticed special friendships between the boys or certain adults and boys?”

He rubbed his temples. “Deputy Cooper, that’s difficult to answer. Naturally, there is affection. Building relationships and providing possible role models is rather the point of Silver Linings. Some boys like some adults better than others. I believe the adults try not to show favoritism. I have never worried. It seems natural to me.”

“I see.”

He paused, choosing his words carefully. “Deputy, you know the Church has been under attack.” He raised his hand, palm outward. “We have to clean house. There is no doubt about the terrible covered-up abuses, but the media seems to enjoy fanning the flames of any story in which we are portrayed in a bad light. Lawsuits have drained the finances of U.S. churches. Worldwide, the Church may be rich, but I would have to say that here in the States we are struggling. Fewer and fewer men enter the priesthood. Rome appears to lack interest in us, preferring areas of the world where fewer questions are asked. However, the hard truth is we need to ask questions.”

“So if you spoke out against a position from Rome that you felt outmoded or unsuited to your flock, would you lose funding?”

“What I would lose is my parish.” He sighed. “Rebellious priests are never in fashion.”

“A few make a great difference.”

“Deputy, I never expected you to be interested in the Church. I’m grateful that you are. And yes, a few priests have made differences, but they are better at public relations. I’m a simple parish priest and I tend to my flock as best I can. If I have a disagreement with dogma, and I’m not saying that I do, I keep it to myself. The time is not right, and it may never be right for me. I don’t know. But I don’t think I will do my people any good if I speak out on such issues. In fact, I think I would cause harm, divisiveness, and confusion.”

“I understand that.” She nodded. “Law enforcement can be rigid and difficult, too. I’m not suggesting it’s the same, only that I understand the conflict between obedience and speaking out for reform.”

“It’s a volatile time, isn’t it?” He sighed.

“Yes, it is. You have lost two of your mainstays, and I am sure that Peter Vavilov and Lou Higham offered generous support to the Church, as well as to Silver Linings. And now there’s the publicity about the missing checks.”

“I could always count on Pete and Lou. They would be so valuable at a time like this. Solid, smart advice.”

“Father O’Connor, did anyone ever come to you and report inappropriate behavior about Pete and Lou?”

“None.” He answered readily, but the question unnerved him. “I would have been shocked. I’m shocked to even think of those two in such a light. They were mainstays.”

“I’m sorry to ask these things, but I must. I have to consider every possibility, no matter how distressful. Did anyone ever complain about Silver Linings; perhaps they felt the boys were engaging in wrongful activities?”

“Yes. Some reports of drinking on the premises, also smoking pot. Brian Hexham looked into it and talked to the boys who had indeed drunk or smoked. And then when Brian gave his lecture on how one’s body changes—sexual desire and responsibility—that drew fire from some of the boys’ parents. I handled that.” He blinked. “It may seem odd to you that a celibate priest can or should speak to such matters, but I think we are bound to do so. We sacrifice our sexuality, if you will, to the Church, to the community. A married man will not put the flock first, he will put his family first, as he should. I am bound to the Church, to Christ. I realize this is a vow few would wish to make and even fewer understand.”

“What happened?”

“Some parents were upset, but the young men were grateful for the information. We forget how tough adolescence is. At that difficult time, you don’t even understand your own body, and there’s so much pressure to conform. To condense what I said, I told the few parents—three mothers and one married couple; most of these boys are from broken families—that if we don’t clearly and honestly address the realities of these boys’ lives, we will have more children out of wedlock, more heartache. Obviously, I believe in abstinence, and just as obviously I know that isn’t going to work for every teenage boy. Everywhere these young people turn, it’s sexual imagery, lyrics in the songs. So while I preach abstinence, I allow Brian to discuss birth control. It’s a bit of a cheat.” He blushed slightly. “But we must protect our boys as well as the girls. And if there’s one thing I emphasize and Silver Linings emphasizes, it’s respect for women.” He threw up his hands. “We’re struggling against the whole culture.”

“Yes, you are,” Cooper agreed. “I’ll give you a break and not ask how you feel about women becoming priests.”

He exhaled. “Thank you.”

“As to the matter of Silver Linings’s finances, the good news is, despite missing three checks, the forensic accountant who works with our office said the books are in order.” She paused, then again said with sympathy, “Father, I regret having to ask you some of these questions, but there is a great deal at stake. For one thing, I don’t want another murder.”

His hand flew to his heart. “Do you think—”

“I strongly believe both men were killed. Very slight evidence, but I’ve learned to trust my gut feelings. You have your calling, Father, and I have mine. It’s one thing to solve a murder, it’s another to prevent one.”

As Cooper spoke to Father O’Connor, Father O’Brien was sitting in the confessional booth. He gave Mass twice a week and offered confession twice a week.

Father O’Brien’s feet were cold. He was wrapped in a heavy shawl and he kept looking at his watch. One more hour.

Someone entered. A woman’s voice, low, said, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.”

“Go on, my child.”

“I am an accessory to murder.”