Footnotes

1

Not to be confused with the other professional position.

2

Not to be confused with the other Norman Hartnell.

3

Don’t ask!

4

Trays don’t really groan. It’s a lie.

5

A different version.

6

A Lazlo Woodbine thriller. And a bloody good one.

7

This is all absolutely true by the way. My Uncle John was a policeman.

8

Also true, I kid you not.

9

Aunt Mary being a big Frankie Vaughn fan at the time.

10

A present from a doting aunt.

11

Apart from one or two notable exceptions. Penge, Orton Goldhay, etc.

12

Actually Russell did not think this at all. This was a far too sophisticated concept for Russell to simply think up there and then. It’s probably just been included for the benefit of the astute reader whose mind it has crossed. There’s no telling, but that would be my guess.

13

The plans for these were actually found in Hitler’s bunker and handed over to the CIA, whatever happened to them next is anyone’s guess.

14

Nazi rhyming slang. Admirals of the Fleet: feet.

15

Albert Speer was Prince Charles’ uncle twice removed through the old Saxe-Coburg clan (allegedly). Prince Charles’ great grandad was also called Albert.

16

Zurich banker: wanker.

17

Aryan roots: boots.

18

Yiddisher’s nose: toes (This is Nazi rhyming slang and therefore anything but politically correct).

19

Russian fronts: er …

20

As Spike once said, “One bit in particular.”

21

1859, Charles “Icarus” Doveston flew his Griffin 4, pedal-driven ornithopter, the plans may be seen in Brentford Library’s permanent exhibition, “WE DONE IT FIRST”

22

It could well be trespass.

23

Well, he always used to be when I was a lad.

24

It was a very high table.

25

So that’s his name.

26

The biggest independent film producer and distributor in the western world. Try to remember his name, because he turns up in the last chapter.

27

Poetic licence.

28

Cheap laugh.

29

Try saying that with something big in your mouth.

30

But I had you going that time, didn’t I?

31

Nazi rhyming slang. Yankee food parcel: arsehole.

32

We did this one earlier.

33

This isn’t a metaphor, it’s an aphorism.

34

And of course there was. Russell had sat on one of their benches.

35

The chap mentioned in Chapter 14.

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