Oh-So-Sensible Secretary

CHAPTER SEVEN

PHIN only smiled and took my hand. ‘Come along, my little cream puff. Let’s go and find some lunch. If you don’t want to celebrate our non-engagement, let’s just celebrate the fact that it’s a beautiful day. What more reason do we need, anyway?’

I tried to imagine Jonathan suggesting that we celebrated the fact that the sun was shining, but I couldn’t do it. It wasn’t that he was a killjoy. Jonathan would celebrate a promotion, a rise in profits, a successful advertising campaign, perhaps. But a lovely day? I didn’t think so.

And if he did celebrate he would want to plan it. Jonathan would book the very best restaurant, or order the most expensive champagne. He wouldn’t just wander along the King’s Road the way Phin did, and find the first place with a table in a sunny window.

But that was why I loved Jonathan, I reminded myself hastily. I loved him precisely because he wasn’t spontaneous, because he was the kind of man who would think things through and plan them sensibly, instead of dropping everything when the sun came out, and because he didn’t act on a whim the way my mother and Phin did.

On the other hand, I have to admit that I enjoyed that lunch-although that may have been largely due to the large glass of wine that came with it. I asked for water, but the wine came, and then it seemed too much of a fuss to send it back, so I ended up drinking it. I’m not used to drinking in the middle of the day, and I could feel myself flushing, and laughing a lot more than I usually do.

Perhaps it was relief at having got through the interview. Perhaps it was the sunshine.

Or perhaps it was Phin sitting opposite me, making me believe that there was nowhere else he would rather be and no one else he would rather be with. Having spent months having to be grateful for any time Jonathan could spare me, it was a novel sensation for me to be the focus of attention for a change.

It was so little, really-to feel that Phin saw me when he looked at me, that he was listening, really listening, to what I was saying-but I’d have been less than human if I hadn’t responded, and I could feel myself unfurling in the simple pleasure of having lunch with an attractive man on a sunny day.

It was very unlike me. I’m normally very puritanical about long lunches in office time. I wasn’t myself that day.

I felt really quite odd, in fact. Fizzy, is the best way to describe it, as if that kiss had left all my senses on high alert. I was desperately aware of Phin opposite me, scanning the menu. I could see every one of the laughter lines around his eyes, the crease in his cheek, and that dent at the corner of his crooked mouth which always seemed on the point of breaking into a smile.

I was supposed to be looking at the menu, too, but I couldn’t concentrate. My eyes kept flickering over to him, skittering from the prickle of stubble on his jaw to his hands, to his throat and then back to that mobile mouth. And my own mouth dried at the memory of how excitingly sure his lips had been.

My whole body still seemed to be humming with the feel of his hands, of his mouth, but at the same time it seemed hard to believe that we could have kissed like that and yet be sitting here quite normally, as if nothing had happened at all. I shifted uncomfortably as I remembered how eagerly I had kissed Phin back. What must he think of me?

On the other hand, it hadn’t been a real kiss, had it? It hadn’t meant anything. Phin had made it clear enough that he had only been kissing me for effect, and I wondered if I ought to make it clear that I had been doing the same. And, yes, I know, that wasn’t exactly how it was, but a girl has her pride.

Or perhaps I should pretend to ignore the whole issue?

I was still dithering when Phin looked up from the menu. ‘Have you decided? I’m going to have a starter, too. I don’t know about you, but all that kissing has given me an appetite!’

Now that he had raised the subject, I thought I might as well take the opportunity to make my position quite clear.

‘Speaking of kissing,’ I said, and was secretly impressed at how cool I sounded, ‘perhaps we ought to discuss what happened earlier. I understand why you kissed me-’ I went on.

Phin’s brows lifted and his smile gleamed. ‘Do you, now?’

‘Of course. It created a convincing effect for Imelda, and I can see that it worked, but I hope there won’t be any need to repeat it,’ I said, at my most priggish.

Much effect it had on Phin. ‘Now, there we differ, cream puff, because I hope there will. I enjoyed that kiss very much. Didn’t you?’

My eyes darted around the table and I longed for the nerve to lie.

‘I just don’t want to lose sight of what we’re trying to do here,’ I said evasively. ‘And don’t call me cream puff.’

‘That wasn’t quite an answer to my question, though, was it?’ said Phin with a provocative smile.

I might have known he wouldn’t let me get away with it.

We locked eyes for a mute moment, until he gave in with a grin and a shake of his head.

‘Look, don’t worry. I haven’t forgotten that for you this is about getting Jonathan back.’

‘And it’s promoting Gibson & Grieve,’ I added quickly, not wanting it to be all about me. ‘Not to mention keeping Jewel at arm’s length!’

‘All very fine causes,’ Phin agreed with a virtuous expression. ‘But since we’re going through this pretence, it seems to me we might as well enjoy it. We’re not going to look like a very convincing couple if we never touch each other, are we? Touching is what couples do.’

Jonathan and I had never touched in public. But then we hadn’t been a real couple, had we?

‘OK,’ I said, ‘but only when necessary.’

‘Only when necessary,’ he confirmed, and held up crossed fingers. ‘Scout’s honour. Now, let’s get serious and talk about lunch…’

I felt that I had made my point, and after that I was able to relax a little. I suppose that glass of wine helped, too. I don’t remember what we talked about-just nonsense, I think-but I was still in an uncharacteristically light-hearted mood when we made it back to the office.

We waited for a lift in the glossy atrium, with the sun angling through the building to lie across the floor in a broad stripe. Phin was telling me about a disastrous trip he’d been on for one of the Into the Wild programmes, where everything that could possibly go wrong had done, and I was laughing when the lift pinged at last and the doors slid open to reveal Lex and Jonathan.

There was a moment of startled silence, then they stepped out. I had a sudden image of myself through Lex’s eyes, flushed and laughing and dishevelled. Somewhere along the line I had mislaid my clip, and my hair was still tumbling to my shoulders. In my silky red shirt I must have looked almost unrecognisable from my usual crisp self.

My smile faded as I encountered first Lex’s stern gaze, then Jonathan’s astounded look.

‘Hello,’ said Phin cheerfully. ‘Don’t tell me you two are sloping off early?’

‘We’ve got a meeting in the City.’ Pointedly Lex looked at his watch and, like Pavlov’s dog, I looked at mine, too. My eyes nearly started out of my head when I saw that it was almost three o’clock. How had it got that late?

‘I see you’re not letting your new position here change your work ethic,’ he added, with one of his trademark sardonic looks.

Phin was unperturbed. ‘Less of the sarcasm, please,’ he said. He was the only person I knew who wasn’t the slightest bit intimidated by Lex. I suppose it helped that Lex was his brother. ‘I’ll have you know we’ve been busy promoting Gibson & Grieve all morning.’

‘It’s some time since morning,’ said Lex, less than impressed.

‘We’ve been recovering from the stress of persuading the media of my family friendly credentials. Summer did an absolutely brilliant job.’

I wished he hadn’t mentioned me. Lex’s cold grey gaze shifted back to me, and it took all I had not to squirm. I was unnervingly aware of Jonathan’s astounded gaze fixed on me, too. I managed a weak smile.

‘Remarkable,’ was all Lex said.

‘Isn’t she?’ said Phin fondly, putting an arm around me and pulling me against him. I could feel the heat and weight of his hand at my waist, making the slippery material of my shirt shift over my skin. ‘That’s just what I’ve been telling her.’

‘We’re so late,’ I wailed as soon as we got in the lift. I could feel myself winding rapidly back up to my usual self. I was never late. Well, there had been yesterday, after the pomegranate martinis, but that had been exceptional circumstances. I couldn’t believe that I had actually sat there in the sun and let time tick by without even thinking about getting back to the office.

‘We’re not late,’ said Phin. ‘We haven’t got any appointments this afternoon.’

‘I should have been back earlier,’ I fretted, remembering Jonathan and Lex’s raised brows. ‘I wish they hadn’t seen me like this,’ I said as I tugged my shirt into place. ‘I look so unprofessional.’

‘Nonsense. You look fantastic,’ said Phin. ‘We couldn’t have planned it better if we had tried. Did you see Jonathan’s expression?’

I nodded. ‘He was horrified,’ I said gloomily.

‘He wasn’t horrified. He was absolutely amazed.’ Phin spoke with complete authority. ‘He looked at you and saw exactly what he could have had if he’d ever taken the trouble to kiss you senseless on a sofa and then take you out to lunch. He didn’t like me touching you either,’ he added.

‘How on earth do you know that?’

‘It’s a guy thing.’ Phin smiled smugly. ‘Trust me, Summer, our little plan is working already.’

I know I should have been delighted, but actually I spent the rest of the afternoon feeling scratchy and unsettled. It was impossible to concentrate. It wasn’t fair, the way Phin could be so casual about it all. How could he kiss me like that and then turn round and sound pleased at the idea of handing me on to someone else?

Easily, of course. It was a guy thing, just like he had said. Phin was perfectly happy to enjoy a kiss, or a long lunch, as long as there was no suggestion of any long-term commitment.

I’m not the settling down type, he had said. Well, no surprises there. And no reason for his cheerful admission to leave me feeling not depressed, exactly, but just a bit…flat.

I told myself not to be so silly.

So there we were, in this ridiculous situation, working together as boss and PA during the day, and at night pretending to be madly in love.

Whenever I stopped to think about what we were doing I wondered what on earth had possessed me to agree to such a thing, so it was easier to carry on as if it were perfectly normal to spend your days talking to your boss about brand marketing or strategic development or the logistics of taking twenty people to Africa to help build a medical centre, and your nights holding his hand and leaning into his warm, solid body as if you knew it as well as your own.

It was a strange time, but the funny thing was it really did seem quite normal after a while. I couldn’t understand why everybody else didn’t see through the pretence right away, but they all seemed to accept it without question. It was bizarre.

I was so unlike Phin’s normal girlfriends, most of whom he still seemed to get on excellently with. To a woman, they were lushly glamorous and prone to extravagant kisses, with much ‘mwah-mwah’ and many ‘darlings’ scattered around. Next to them, I felt prim and boring. I tried to loosen up, but every time Phin put his arm around me or took my hand my senses would snarl into a knot and I would prickle all over with awareness. It wasn’t exactly relaxing.

The first night we appeared as a couple we went to a party, to launch some perfume, I think. Something unlikely, anyway. I can remember wondering why on earth Phin had been invited, but he seemed to be on hobnobbing terms with all sorts of celebrities. That was also the first time I realised quite how many ex-girlfriends he had, and I was glad I hadn’t done anything silly like let myself wonder if that kiss might have meant something to Phin, too.

Still, I was nervous. It was all so strange to me, and I was feeling very self-conscious in a short dress with spaghetti straps which I had borrowed from Anne. It showed rather more flesh than I was used to, and when Phin let his hand slide down my spine I shivered.

He clicked his tongue. ‘You’re too tense,’ he murmured in my ear. ‘You’re supposed to like me touching you.’

‘Anyone would be tense, meeting all your ex-girlfriends like this,’ I said out of the corner of my mouth, while keeping my smile fixed in place. ‘They’re all wondering what on earth you’re doing with me.’

‘Their boyfriends aren’t.’ His smile glimmered as he ran a knuckle along the neckline of my dress. ‘You look delectable, in a behind-closed-doors kind of way.’

I hated the way every cell in my body seemed to leap at his touch. It made it very hard to remember that I was in control.

‘What kind of way is that?’ I asked, squirming at the breathlessness in my voice.

‘You know-all cool on the surface, but making every man feel that if only he were lucky enough to get you on your own you’d be every hot-blooded male’s fantasy.’

‘Oh, please,’ I said edgily, moving away from him. ‘And stop stroking me!’

‘Nope,’ said Phin as he pulled me easily back against him. ‘You’re my girlfriend, and I can’t keep my hands off you!’

‘You’ve clearly got the same problem with your ex-girlfriends too,’ I said waspishly. ‘I notice you’re still very touchy-feely with them.’

‘Could it be that you’re jealous, cream puff?’

‘I’m hardly likely to be jealous, am I? I’m just keeping in character, like you. I’m sure if I really was your new girlfriend I wouldn’t want to see quite how chummy you still are with them.’

‘I’m just saying hello to old friends.’

I sniffed. ‘I can manage to say hello to friends without sticking my tongue down their throats!’

‘You do exaggerate, Summer-’ Phin began, amused, and then broke off. ‘Uh-oh. Do you see who I see?’

I followed his gaze to where Jewel Stevens was wrapped around a young guy who looked vaguely familiar to me. I wondered if I’d seen him on television. He was very pretty, but had a vacuous look about him.

‘That’s Ricky Roland,’ said Phin in my ear. ‘He’s a rising star, they say, and just as well if he’s going to get involved with Jewel! He’ll be able to afford a new dinner service. I wonder how many plates he’s got left?’

‘She’s coming over,’ I hissed as Jewel somehow spotted Phin and made a beeline for him, abandoning poor Ricky with barely a word. Phin promptly put his arm around my waist and pulled me closer, so that I was half in front of him like a shield.

‘Phin, darling, where have you been?’ she cried as she came up-and, completely ignoring my existence, she gave him a smacking kiss on the lips.

‘Peru,’ he said, keeping a firm hold of me.

‘What on earth for?’ said Jewel, but didn’t bother to wait for his reply. She glanced languidly around at the party. ‘This is all very tedious, isn’t it? We’re all going on to a club after this if you want to come.’

‘Not tonight, thanks, Jewel,’ said Phin, his smile steady but inflexible. ‘I’m taking Summer home. You remember Summer, don’t you?’

Jewel’s eyes flicked over me as if I was something unpleasant Phin had brought in on the bottom of his shoe. ‘No.’

Charming, I thought. ‘I’m Phin’s PA,’ I reminded her.

‘And so much more than that, too,’ said Phin.

At that, Jewel’s gaze sharpened, and she looked from Phin to me, and then back to Phin again. ‘You and…Sunshine, or whatever her name is?’ she said incredulously.

‘Yes,’ said Phin blandly. ‘Me and Summer.’

Disconcertingly, Jewel began to laugh. ‘You and your little secretary…isn’t that a bit of a cliché, darling?’

Phin’s arm tightened around me, but his voice was admirably even. ‘That’s the thing about clichés,’ he said. ‘They’re so often true.’

‘Well, if you say so.’ Jewel was evidently unconvinced. Her brown eyes rested speculatively on me once more, and I could practically hear her thinking that I was too boring to hold Phin’s attention for more than five minutes. ‘How very odd,’ she said.

And then she leant forward to Phin and did her ear licking trick again. Bleuch. ‘When you’re bored and want some excitement again, give me a call,’ she said huskily, only to shriek and leap back as I moved, managing to stand on her foot and spill my glass of champagne all down her fabulous dress at the same time.

It was quite a clever move, even if I say so myself. Subtle, but effective.

‘Oh, I’m so sorry,’ I said insincerely as she glared at me. I could feel Phin’s body shaking with suppressed laughter. ‘How clumsy of me.’

I could see Jewel debating whether to make a scene, but in the end she just sent me a poisonous look and kissed Phin once more. On the mouth, this time, which was a fairly effective retort of her own.

‘You know where to find me when you change your mind, darling,’ she said to him.

My lips thinned as she prowled off to reclaim Ricky Roland, who was making the big mistake of talking to a pretty girl about his own age. I didn’t fancy his chances of keeping the rest of his plates intact.

‘When!’ I huffed. ‘She’s got a nerve, hasn’t she? Not even if you lose interest in me!’

‘Yes, but the round definitely went to you, with the champagne spilling trick,’ said Phin, letting me go at last. ‘That was an excellent impression of a jealous girlfriend, Summer. I didn’t think you had it in you!’

‘I don’t think it convinced Jewel,’ I said. ‘She clearly didn’t believe for a moment that you’d be interested in anyone as boring as me!’

‘No? Well, her style is much more obvious than yours.’

‘You can say that again!’

He studied me for a moment. ‘Personally, I think that restrained look is good for you. It’s classy. On the other hand, it would look more natural if you could be a little more relaxed.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘We may have to do something about making you look a little less like a librarian who’s strayed into an orgy,’ said Phin. ‘It works for me-don’t get me wrong!-but other people might wonder eventually why you’re so tense with me.’

‘Maybe they’ll think I’m shy,’ I said, on the defensive. I knew I looked uptight-I felt uptight-but then so would you if you had to snuggle up to Phin while Jewel stuck her tongue down his ear, and I wasn’t used to parties where you fell over a celebrity every time you turned round.

‘You can get away with being shy tonight, but the next time we go out you’ll need to loosen up a bit.’

‘How do you suggest I do that?’ I snapped, annoyed because I knew he was right.

‘I’m not sure yet,’ said Phin. ‘I’ll give it some thought.’

But, apart from Jewel, everyone seemed to accept our supposed relationship with an extraordinary lack of surprise. Monique, Lex’s PA, whom I’d always admired for her perspicacity, even told me that she thought Phin and I were a perfect match!

‘You’re just right for each other,’ she said when we met in the corridor one day, on my way back from making coffee. ‘He’s so lovely, isn’t he?’ she went on, while I was still boggling at the idea that anyone could think Phin and I were right for each other when it must be blindingly obvious that we were completely different.

‘Lex is always baffled by him, but Phin is a huge asset to Gibson & Grieve if only he’d recognise it. He’s one of those people that just has to walk into a room and everyone relaxes, because you know he’ll be able to defuse any situation and charm everyone so they’ll all go away feeling good about themselves, whatever’s been decided.’

I did some more boggling then. Relaxed was the last thing I felt with Phin. He was too unpredictable. One minute he’d be sitting lazily with his feet up on the desk, the next he’d be fizzing with energy. I never knew when he was going to appear or what he was going to do.

Whenever Phin was around I felt edgy, jittery. My pulse was prone to kicking up a beat at the most inexplicable moments. All he had to do was stretch his arms above his head and yawn, or look at me with that smile twitching at his mouth, and my heart would start to thump and an alarming shivery feeling would uncoil in my belly and tremble outwards, until my whole skin prickled with awareness. It was very disturbing.

Relaxed? Ha!

‘How are you anyway, Monique?’ I asked, sick of being told how wonderful Phin was.

‘Fantastic,’ she said, beaming. ‘In fact…’ She checked to make sure no one else was around. ‘I’m not telling many people yet, as it’s early days, but I’m pregnant!’

I was delighted for her. I knew that Monique and her husband had been hoping for a baby for a while now. ‘Monique, that’s wonderful news! Dave must be thrilled.’

‘He is. Lex is less so, of course,’ she said, with a wry roll of her eyes.

Monique adored her boss, but she had no illusions about him. With Lex it was business all the way, and babies just didn’t enter the equation.

‘He was grumbling just this morning that if I’d told him earlier he would never have let you go and work for Phin-and what a shame that would have been!’ She hesitated. ‘I don’t suppose you’d want to go back to Lex’s office now, but he’ll be looking for someone he trusts to cover my maternity leave, so if you’re interested there might be an opening in a few months.’

‘Really?’

‘The baby’s due in September, so I’ll work up until August,’ she said. ‘Talk it over with Phin and see what he thinks. If you’re spending all your time together, it might not be a bad thing to work in different offices…but you’d obviously want to vet any new PA!’ Monique could obviously see the thoughts whirling in my brain. ‘Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything? I was just being selfish. It would make it so much easier for me if I could reassure Lex that you’d look after him while I’m away, that’s all.’

‘I’ll definitely think about it,’ I promised.

Thoughtfully, I carried the coffee back to my office. To be Lex’s PA-the most senior in the company…! Only temporarily, of course, until Monique came back. But what a thing to have on my CV. It would be an extraordinary opportunity, and one I could only ever have dreamed of up to now.

It was hard to believe that only a month ago I had felt utterly hopeless. Now I not only had the prospect of a fantastic promotion, but there was even a real chance of getting back together with Jonathan. Or so Phin seemed to think-and, much as I hated to admit that he was right, I had to admit that Jonathan had been much more friendly the last few days. He had taken to dropping by the office on the slimmest of pretexts, and telling me how nice I looked if we met by the lifts.

It was all very confusing. Everything was changing so quickly I didn’t know what to think any more.

I should be excited. I knew that. In a few months’ time I could be back with Jonathan and working with the Chief Executive-and Phin…Well, this had only ever been meant as a temporary exercise anyway. Phin would move on. He’d go back to making television programmes and I wouldn’t see him any more. There would be no more jitteriness, no more exasperation, no more teasing. No more doughnuts. And that would be fine, I told myself. It would all work out perfectly.

But there was a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach all the same.

‘What’s up?’ said Phin, when I took in his coffee. It was uncanny the way he always knew if something had happened, no matter how smooth I made my expression.

So I told him what Monique had said. ‘Typical Lex,’ was his comment, when he heard about his brother’s response to the news that his PA was having a much longed for baby. ‘He’s got no idea. You’d think he could be happy for her before he thought about how her pregnancy will affect Gibson & Grieve!’

‘Monique doesn’t really mind,’ I said, a little uncomfortably. ‘She knows what he’s like. The normal rules don’t apply to someone like Lex.’

‘Well, they should,’ said Phin. He was leaning back, twirling a pen between his fingers. ‘So what about you?’ he asked, blue eyes suddenly intent. ‘Do you really want to work for a man who wouldn’t know what a doughnut was, let alone think about buying you one?’

‘It would be a good career opportunity for me.’ Unable to bear it any longer, I held out my hand for the pen, and after a stubborn moment he surrendered it, dropping it into my open palm.

‘At least I wouldn’t have to put up with your endless fiddling any longer,’ I said, putting the pen back into its holder. ‘And it might be easier when our supposed romance falls through,’ I added. ‘It would look a bit odd if we carried on working together perfectly happily when…if…’

‘When you’re back with Jonathan?’ Phin finished for me.

There was an unusual note in his voice that made me look sharply at him.

‘Even if that doesn’t happen, we can’t carry on like this indefinitely,’ I pointed out.

‘Then we’ll have to make sure it does happen,’ he said, swinging his feet off the desk abruptly. ‘Maybe it’s time to intensify our campaign. When’s the launch party for the Charmless Chef?’

The Charmless Chef was Phin’s own title for a series of TV food programmes that Gibson & Grieve were sponsoring that spring. It was actually called Hodge Hits, after the presenter, celebrity chef Stephen Hodge. Hodge was famously rude, and prone to the most appalling temper tantrums. Very early in his career he had discovered that the worse he behaved, the more audiences would want to watch him and the more he would be paid.

This meant Gibson & Grieve would get even more publicity from their sponsorship of the programme, and a fabulous party had been planned to mark the launch and appease his monstrous ego. All senior staff were on a three line whip to turn up and do whatever it took to keep Stephen Hodge happy. Except Lex, of course. He hated socialising, and only went out when absolutely necessary. On this occasion Phin was lined up to represent him and make a speech.

‘It’s on Friday,’ I said.

‘Jonathan will be there, won’t he?’

‘Of course. He negotiated the deal with Stephen Hodge,’ I reminded Phin.

‘In that case you’ll have to pull out all the stops. You always look smart, but on Friday you’ve got to look stunning. Take tomorrow off and buy a special dress if you have to, but wear something that will knock Jonathan’s socks off.’

‘He’ll be too busy with Stephen Hodge to notice me,’ I protested, but Phin refused to listen to any objections.

‘If you get the right dress he’ll notice you, all right,’ he said. ‘Besides, I have a cunning plan up my sleeve to relax you.’

‘What sort of plan?’ I asked suspiciously. I had tried to loosen up whenever we’d been out together, but it was almost impossible when every cell in my body jolted if Phin so much as grazed me with his touch.

‘I’ll explain on Friday,’ he said. ‘The launch is at seven, isn’t it? We might as well go straight from here.’

Which is how I ended up changing in the directors’ bathroom that Friday evening. I’d brought my dress in on a hanger, and carried shoes and make-up in a separate bag.

I had put the need to look stunning to Anne, who had borne me off late-night shopping the night before, and bullied me into buying the most expensive dress I’d ever owned. Even though I felt faintly sick whenever I thought about my credit card bill, I couldn’t regret it. It was so beautiful.

I don’t really know how to begin to describe it. It was red, but not that hard pillarbox red that’s so hard to wear. This was a softer, deeper, warmer red-a simple sleeveless sheath, with a layer of chiffon that floated and swirled as I walked. I wasn’t used to such a plunging neckline, and with bare shoulders and a bare back I felt a lot more exposed than usual, but it was the kind of dress you couldn’t help but feel good in.

I’d painted my toenails a lovely deep red-Ruby, Ruby-to match my fingers, and slipped my feet into beautiful jewelled sandals. My hair was swept up into a clip, and I thought it looked elegant like that, but I hesitated as I studied my reflection, remembering Phin’s librarian comment. On an impulse I pulled the clip out and shook my hair free, and then I walked back into the office before I could change my mind.

Phin was there, adjusting his bow tie, but his fingers froze when he saw me. There was a moment of stunned silence. ‘Dear God,’ he said blankly.

My confidence promptly evaporated. ‘What’s wrong with it?’ I asked, looking down at my lovely dress. I’d been so sure he would like it.

‘Nothing’s wrong.’ Phin cleared his throat. ‘Nothing at all. You look…incredible.’

He sounded a bit odd, I thought, but he had said I looked incredible. ‘Shall I order a taxi?’ I asked after a moment.

‘No, it’s all sorted,’ he said, still distracted. ‘A car’s waiting downstairs.’

‘Oh. Well, shall we go, then?’

Phin seemed to pull himself together. ‘Not quite yet, CP,’ he said, making a good recovery. ‘We need to put my cunning plan into action first.’

‘CP?’ I echoed blankly.

‘Cream…’ He waited expectantly for me to supply the rest.

Puff, in fact. I sighed.

‘Oh, for heaven’s sake,’ I said crossly. ‘Will you stop with the silly names? Now, what is this plan of yours?’

‘It’s really quite simple,’ said Phin, coming towards me. ‘I’m going to kiss you.’