Play It Safe

Chapter Fourteen Feels Good Doesn’t It?

Nearly two hours later…

“Maybe we can go see a movie?” I suggested.

Gray was driving. I was sitting in the passenger seat. We were headed back to his house.

Grandma Miriam had informed us after more communing in the Fellowship Hall when the singing, sermon, praying and more singing was done, she had made plans (just then) with her friend Shirley to go to Shirley’s daughter’s house for Sunday lunch. Then Shirley’s daughter and her husband were going out and Grandma Miriam and Shirley were going to watch Shirley’s daughter’s kids.

She wasn’t going to be home, she didn’t reckon, until close to ten.

“You can,” she began, her eyes slid to me, her mouth twitched then her eyes went back to Gray, “order a pizza or something.”

“Think I can feed myself and my girl,” Gray had muttered then surprisingly, with no further ado, he leaned right in, kissed his grandmother’s cheek, grabbed my hand and dragged me right out to his truck.

During this short, fast trek, I had asked if Shirley needed any help with Grandma Miriam and her chair but Gray assured me that Shirley’s daughter’s husband knew the drill and would sort it.

And away we went.

Now we had the whole day. I was off again and I wanted to do something normal people did.

Back in the day, when I was still a kid, Casey would take me to see movies. Not many of them, it was a treat, but he did it and I loved it. I loved movie popcorn. I loved being in a dark cinema where you felt alone even though you weren’t, your vision filled with what was on screen.

But when I grew up and learned that movies were an extravagance we couldn’t afford, I put a stop to it.

Now I made my own coffee. I poured my own cereal. I went to grocery stores (kind of, if the corner store could be classed as that, but I figured it could since most of what they carried were groceries). I had a job. I owned a skirt. I had my own place.

I was nearly normal.

I wanted to do something normal.

And I hoped Gray did too.

We turned into the long lane that led up to his house and as we did, he muttered, “We’re not gonna go see a movie.”

My head turned to him in surprise. This was because he sounded preoccupied. This was also because it occurred to me in that instant that Gray gave me everything I wanted and I was surprised he denied me.

Not that I’d ever asked for anything. Not the finest of steak dinners no matter that it was served at the VFW. Not for him to pay for my breakfast when we went to the diner. Not for a pair of gloves I knew just looking at them but definitely by the feel they were way on the other side of expensive.

But he gave them to me all the same.

Then it hit me he had a beautiful farmhouse, a bunch of land, decent clothes and a great leather jacket but the first two had been left to him and he had upkeep. He also had a beat up pickup truck that had to be at least a decade old and a grandmother who needed a nurse to come in five days a week to take care of her.

Maybe he couldn’t afford expensive gloves, taking me to the diner and a movie.

“My treat,” I said brightly and it could be my treat. It wasn’t like I was going to retire on the Riviera within a year but without a hotel to pay for and with Janie giving me the room for two months for free I could take us to a movie and save for all the stuff I needed to start my life.

And I was looking forward to that. Getting my own car. My own mugs. My own silverware. Buying my own comforter. Replacing Gray’s TV with a new one.

I couldn’t wait for that either.

“We’re not goin’ to a movie, baby,” Gray murmured, his voice sweet, soft but still preoccupied.

“Okay,” I whispered.

Maybe he didn’t like movies or maybe he didn’t like going to the theater. Maybe on my next day off, I’d go. Though I didn’t know where the cinemas were. I knew they didn’t have one in town. And I didn’t have a car so I couldn’t get there unless I asked Gray to drop me off and pick me up which I wasn’t going to do.

So maybe I’d wait until I had my own car which might be November but I hadn’t seen a movie in the cinema in years. I could wait until November.

Gray parked where he normally parked beside the house and his door was open nearly before he had the old girl shut down. Mine creaked as I threw it open, I hopped down and it creaked as I slammed it.

Then I jumped because Gray was right there, hand in mine and he was dragging me to the house.

What on earth?

I mean, he held my hand and he did it a lot. Usually, he slid his arm around my shoulders and held me close to him but holding my hand wasn’t unheard of. He even waited on his side of the truck when we got to his place for me to round it then he took my hand or slid his arm around my shoulders so we could walk the short distance to his house.

But he’d never come to my side, grabbed my hand and dragged me to the house.

Up the three wooden steps to the porch, past the porch swing to the front door and in. Then he stopped us, closed the door and immediately shrugged off his leather jacket and tossed it on the piece of furniture next to the door in his hall. It was one of those things that looked like a weird seat with armrests and a super tall back that had a mirror in it, the seat opened up so you could store stuff in it and there were hooks all around the mirror.

As he did this, I pulled the strap of my purse over my head.

The instant I got it cleared, Gray grabbed it and tossed it on his coat.

I blinked and froze.

Gray didn’t.

He shrugged off his suit jacket (incidentally, Gray wore a suit to church and it looked amazing on him, dark blue with a dark blue/gray shirt under it and a phenomenal tie, I loved him in jeans but I had to say, that suit on him looked fabulous). He threw that on his jacket and I looked up at him.

“What –?” I started but he grabbed my hand and dragged me up the stairs.

It was then I knew what and my belly dipped.

Grandma Miriam was out of the house.

We had it to ourselves.

Until ten.

And yesterday, the floodgates had been opened.

Here comes the flood.

Oh my.

My heart jumpstarted, ticking over fast so by the time we got to the top of the stairs, I felt every beat.

When we got to the top, instead of going left to my room, he took us right.

To his.

I’d never seen his room even though it was across from the bathroom. The door had always been closed.

For some bizarre reason, I couldn’t wait for that either.

In record time Gray had me down the hall, his hand went out, turned the knob and he pulled me into his room.

I understood his hurry, I knew his intent but still, walking in his room the first time, I came out of myself and just stared.

This was because it was like we walked into a different house.

No doilies. No flowers. No pastel carpets. No pretty quilts.

The walls were the color of his shirt, a dark blue/gray. The furniture was heavy, masculine, dark wood, all angles, squares, rectangles with no-nonsense manly etching in the drawers and cabinets.

The house was tidy and clean, although full of stuff.

His room wasn’t tidy and clean or full of stuff. No trophies he won playing sports as a youngster, ribbons displayed. Over the bed there was a huge black and white photo of the Colorado Mountains that I knew was taken by Cotton, a famous photographer who lived in said mountains. There were jeans, boots, long-sleeved tees and flannel shirts in tangles on the floor. Books on the nightstands, so many of them, they overflowed to the floor. There was change in a small bowl on one of his dressers. Sturdy, manly matching lamps on the nightstands and another one on the low bureau.

And that was it. No other decorative touches. Nothing.

And the bed was huge.

Huge.

Squared off head and footboard with slats, dark gray cover covering a down comforter, dark blue sheets. There were six pillows, six in disarray at the head of the unmade bed.

“Boots off, darlin’,” Gray muttered, my body jolted and my eyes flew to him to see him pulling at the knot in his tie.

“Wha… what?”

“Boots…” his eyes locked on mine and the fever in them corresponded in heat flooding my body, “off.”

Oh…

My.

I dropped my head, lifted my foot and pulled off my boot. Then I did the same with the other.

I’d just straightened when Gray was in my space and moving, rounding me close, herding me as he unwrapped the scarf from around my neck and tossed it aside.

My stomach dropped again, my heart started thumping again and heat gathered between my legs.

He moved forward, shuffling me back, hands to my jeans jacket, he pulled it over my shoulders, down my arms and then it was gone.

My mouth went dry.

Then one of his arms wrapped tight around me, the fingers of his other hand drove into my hair, cupping my head, he tilted it, his slanted the other way and his mouth crushed down on mine.

His tongue was sliding in my mouth as I fell backwards, my arms automatically wrapped around him and he landed on top of me in his bed.

Oh yes, it was oh my.

My breath went out of me taking his weight but he rolled instantly so I was on top even as he continued kissing me.

I didn’t care about my breath being gone. I was used to being breathless. Gray kissed me to that state all the time.

Then his hand left my head, both went into my sweater, up, my arms were forced up, my head jerked back and whoosh! It was gone.

I no sooner processed this fact before I was on my back again, Gray’s mouth on mine but his torso was angled away from me because his hands were on the buttons of his shirt.

I got lost in his kiss before he arched his back completely, whispering, “Help me out, dollface, I want to feel you skin against skin.”

Oh yes. I wanted that too.

But more, I wanted to see his chest again.

With shaking hands I started helping him undo the buttons on his shirt then they were undone. He tore it over his shoulders, down his arms and it was gone.

My eyes had a nanosecond to drink him in.

Just as I remembered. Fantastic

Then his mouth was back to mine, his tongue in my mouth, his warm, hard chest crushing my breasts, his hands on me, my hands on him and he felt so good, every inch, every centimeter.

His hands slid around my back, I felt the fingers of one at my bra then it was loose then he lifted up and it was gone.

Over the last week, Gray hadn’t avoided my breasts. When we were making out on his couch, he’d cupped one over the bra, his thumb gliding across my nipple and that was fabulous. And yesterday, in the haystack, his hands under my clothes, he paid them a considerable amount of attention.

But he’d never seen them.

Suddenly, uncertainty slithered in as he again arched his back, his eyes gliding down my body and he took me in.

It hit me then this was going fast. Really fast.

And I was a virgin.

I needed to slow things down.

“Gray –” I whispered, his eyes went from my body to mine and I clamped my mouth shut at the look in them.

It was blistering. It was appreciative. And it was carnal.

I was again breathless.

“Prettiest thing I’ve ever fuckin’ seen,” he whispered then he came back to me but did it by twisting his torso even as his hand slid up my ribs to cup the bottom of my breast, lift it and then his mouth was there and he drew my nipple sharply between his lips.

Heat shafted through me, my back left the bed and both my hands slid into his hair as I whimpered.

And that was it, I was lost. It was all mouths and tongues, licking, sucking, biting, hands roaming, nails scraping. I heard the zip go down on my skirt then it was gone then my tights with my panties. Then I heard the zip on Gray’s trousers and suddenly he was naked. I didn’t see it, I was too busy running my tongue up his neck, one of my hands gliding along the skin of his back, the other one over the skin over the defined muscles at his stomach. I heard his swift intake of breath as they trailed and then he adjusted. Jerking me with him until I was on my back, Gray’s weight on me, his hips were rolling. My legs opened automatically, his fell between, his hands raced up the back of my thighs, hooking the back of my knees, yanking them up and he drove inside.

My back arched and I cried out, not in pleasure, in pain as that surprising sensation seared through me.

Gray’s body went statue-still for a moment, still buried inside me then just his head came up.

My neck righted and my eyes opened as his hand framed one side of my face.

“Jesus, Ivey,” he whispered.

“I kinda…” I hesitated, “got excited and forgot to uh…” I paused again, “mention I was a virgin.”

“How the fuck did that happen?” he asked.

What a bizarre question.

“Um… when you don’t have sex?” I answered in a question.

He stared at me then his face got that near to tender look but he did it one better because he got that look even as his eyes warmed in a way I hadn’t seen before (and Gray’s eyes were almost always warm). In a way that made my body warm all over, his lips tipped up in a grin and his dimple popped out.

Sensational.

“Yeah, my beautiful Ivey, but how the fuck does a girl like you reach the age of twenty-two and not have sex?”

My belly dropped again but this time not in a good way.

“Like me as in a pool hustler?” I whispered and his thumb immediately slid out to stroke my cheek as his face got closer, his grin disappeared but the tender took over his expression.

“No, dollface, like you like the most beautiful girl to hit Mustang, fuck, maybe the entire state of Colorado in a century. Like that kind of girl.”

My belly didn’t drop with that. It flipped.

“In my life, I haven’t made a lot of connections,” I told him softly and the grin can back.

“You’re connected now, baby.”

I was. I definitely was. In a lot of ways.

All of them good.

I returned his grin.

His hand left my face, slid down my shoulder, arm, in between us and down.

“Wrap your legs around my hips, Ivey. I’m gonna take care of you so you can take me,” he ordered gently, my whole body trembled and his grin turned into a smile.

“My girl likes that,” he whispered.

“Yes,” I whispered back.

His thumb hit the spot, pressed in and rolled.

My eyes closed and my neck slightly arched.

“And my girl likes that,” he growled.

“Yes,” I breathed.

He kept pressing and rolling, I held on tight. He kept doing it, I held on tighter, lifted my face and shoved it in his neck. He kept doing it and started moving inside me slowly.

Oh yes.

That felt really good.

My head turned and I gasped in his ear, “Gray.”

He stopped.

My limbs clutched him and I gasped again, “Don’t stop!”

He kept going.

And going, thumb swirling.

Oh yes.

Yes.

“Gray,” I breathed in his ear.

“Right here, Ivey,” he whispered in mine.

Right there, as right there as he could be.

Instinctively, I lifted my hips, rocking them up with each of his strokes.

When I did this, Gray groaned, his strokes went deeper then they started going faster, harder, his finger pressing and rolling.

Yes.

More, faster, harder, deeper, I held on tight.

Yes. That felt really, really good.

“Gray,” I gasped.

“Right here, baby.”

“Oh my God,” I breathed then there it was.

My head flew back into the pillows, my fingers plunged into his hair and fisted, I cried out then moaned loud then just felt it, lips parted, no breath, experiencing the beauty as it washed over me.

Better than in the haystack.

Better than anything in the world.

The best.

When my body relaxed under him, his thumb left me and his hand pulled one of my arms from around him. His fingers lacing through mine, he lifted our hands and pressed them in the pillow beside my head. Lifting up on his other forearm that he was bracing his weight on in the bed, that hand slid up and his fingers tangled in my hair as his head came up, his eyes locking on mine and he kept thrusting.

I kept rocking my hips and taking him, digging my heels into him to do it, watching him moving inside me and he was so beautiful, it was arguably better than what he’d just given me.

Then he drove deep, his fingers laced through mine tightened, his other hand fisted in my hair, pulling my head slightly to the side and his face disappeared in my neck where he groaned against my skin.

I liked that. The sound, the feel, it was beautiful.

Okay, no.

That was better.

He stayed buried inside me and I held him close to me until his breath came to almost even and his mouth started nuzzling my neck, his fingers never unlacing from mine.

And there it was.

A week and a day ago I was a girl who owned a bag of stuff and not much of it was good.

And now, I was lying in a huge, masculine bed, on soft, dark sheets, wrapped around the most beautiful man I’d ever seen and I was a girl who had everything.

And at that thought, it came right out of my mouth.

“How can one day you have next to nothing and then a week and a day later you have everything?”

Gray’s head came up, my eyes went to his and it was there, that tender look as he lifted the hand he held, twisted it and brushed his lips against my knuckles.

That was so sweet, seeing him do it, feeling his lips, my heart skipped a beat.

Then he let my hand go, his came back to my face, his thumb moving out and gliding along my lip as he answered, “Don’t know, dollface, but feels good doesn’t it?”

Oh my.

He felt the same.

“Yeah,” I whispered against the pad of his thumb.

“Yeah,” he whispered back.

Then his thumb swept away and he replaced it with his lips.

I thought I had everything a moment before but just like Gray, wrapped around him, still connected to him, his mouth on mine, he gave me more.