Political Pressure

11

"Holy Toledo, Remo, was that really necessary?"

"Yeah, Junior." Remo sighed. "Give me Smitty."

"He's out. You know how much you gave that guy?" Mark Howard demanded on the hotel phone.

"Of course I do," Remo said, trying to remember how much he gave the cabbie. "Can you stop asking amazed questions, please?"

"I'm not amazed. I'm aghast."

"I'm going," Remo said.

"You know, even I don't make that much in a year."

Remo sniffed. "Come on, Junior."

"It's true."

"Okay, you got me. How much did I give that guy?"

Mark Howard read off a long number with the words "dollars" at the end.

"Well," Remo said, thinking fast, "the guy needed a new cab. Chiun destroyed his old one."

"But it was Remo who destroyed his self-esteem," Chiun called. He was on the floor in front of the thirty- inch television watching a trio of weeping Hispanic women accuse one another of horrific betrayals.

"What's he mean by that?" Mark Howard asked.

Remo steered the conversation in a new direction. "Junior, you have to be kidding me. Your salary is less than that?"

"Yeah. So what?"

"Annually?"

"Yeah. But it wasn't exactly a small chunk of change, Remo," Mark Howard said, and now it was his turn to be on the defensive.

"It was a hell of a tip, yeah, but it's lousy take-home pay for a guy who does everything that you do," Remo insisted.

"Compared to you, maybe—"

"I don't care who you compare it to, you're underpaid. No wonder you live in that dive in Rye."

Mark Howard tried to make sense of the rapid-fire insults and compliments.

"Don't worry about it, Junior. I'll take care of it."

"Remo, I do not want you interfering in my relationship with Dr. Smith."

"Working with Weird Harold's the very reason you ought to be making a hell of a lot more than you do," Remo said.

"Can we discuss the mission, please?"

Remo was pleasantly surprised that, for once, it wasn't him being bogged down in idiotic minutiae. This time, he was the bogger instead of the boggee.

"Okay, shoot, what's on the agenda?" He couldn't help but grin.

Mark Howard made a sound like he was trying to massage the stress out of his forehead. "Federal Circuit Court at 1:00 p.m. A bunch of state employees hired by the last governor—get this, a bunch of wealthy campaign contributors found a loophole that makes it legal for them to give a personal cash gift to the governor and get employment for their wives or kids or friends in return, and the new job pays more than the cash gift. But the employees were fired by the incoming governor, which he technically did not have the right to do. They're suing to get their jobs back."

"Yawn," Remo said. "Can't we go after some of the real lowlifes? There's crossing guards out there selling crack to grammar-school kids. Aren't they getting offed by the same bunch of do-gooders?"

"This is the most high-profile case in the country involving blatant corruption," Mark said. "We tracked a Colorado killing this morning that was probably a White Hand murder. We think it's a prelude to something big and this is it."

"I hope you're right," Remo said. "This is turning out to be an expensive business trip for the company."