Carmelo whickered at me and snuffled at the pockets of my patio dress for the carrots he was sure I carried. Mom pushed his head away, saying, “Get away, greedy.”
I took a deep breath of the barn air, taking in the scents of hay and clean water and horse dung, and felt my shoulders relax. I hadn’t known where to go after leaving Rafe’s condo. The realization that someone had been there when I arrived, hidden in the closet, gave me the creeps. I couldn’t leave fast enough. On the quiet street in front of the building, I looked both ways, nervously searching for signs that anyone was paying attention to me. A guy in a Dodge Charger pulling out of the condo garage gave me an appreciative once-over, but that didn’t count-it happens all the time if you’re tall, blond, and stacked. I didn’t see anyone who looked like a cop, or anyone lurking behind a tree. A black woman sat at a bus stop, reading a romance novel. A pair of young mothers walked past briskly, pushing strollers. A man ran a leaf blower, spraying trash and dust off the sidewalk into the street.
I hurried to my yellow Volkswagen Beetle and got in, locked the doors and sat there a moment, unsure where to go. If I went home, the cops might show up and arrest me. I had to go home eventually, but I wanted to delay it as long as possible. Danielle was working, so I couldn’t meet her someplace. I could go to Dad’s or to Mom’s. After some thought, Mom won out, primarily because her last name was different than mine since she and Dad divorced, and I didn’t think it would be as easy for the police to track me to her place.
“I can’t believe Rafe was murdered,” Mom said for the third time since I’d arrived fifteen minutes ago. “I never thought he was the man for you, dear, but murdered!” She bent to lift Carmelo’s hoof and work out some pebbles with a hoof pick.
Mom does horses. Horses and basketball. That’s why the three current inmates of her six-stall barn outside Albie, Virginia, were Carmelo, Kobe (a mare), and Bird, the twenty-two-year-old bay gelding I’d learned to ride on. I patted his neck, watching Mom work. She moved with economy of motion, and her slim, angular body still looked great in form-fitting riding breeches. From behind, with her graying red hair covered by a riding helmet, you’d think she was thirty instead of fifty-four. Riding might be good for her figure, but it had sabotaged my folks’ marriage. My father got tired of the vast sums of money spent on horsey well-being and dressage training, and Mom’s frequent absences that left him working full time and taking care of three kids as well.
When he’d said “It’s me or the nags,” she went with the horses and didn’t even try for custody of me and Danielle and Nick. I’d been upset with that as a teenager, but I’d gotten over it. Mostly. Danielle still had issues with Mom, but I sort of understood about passion trumping all else. When I fell in love with ballroom dancing, Mom was the one who persuaded Dad to let me keep at it-he wanted me to take up a scholarship sport like volleyball-despite the steep competition bills. She said it was important to follow one’s passion. She even fronted the money for coaching and dresses with her dressage winnings, and came to watch me dance when she could. At prom time, I might have wished she’d been hovering in the foyer like other moms, snapping photos of me and my date, instead of in Brussels or Germany at an international equestrian event, or that she’d been around to take me to the ER when I broke my arm falling out of a lift, but she was around when she could be.
Picking up a curry comb, I began brushing Bird, who enjoyed being groomed. If he’d been a cat, he’d have been purring. “I’m afraid the police are going to arrest me, Mom.”
“You didn’t shoot him, did you?” she asked, with no more angst in the question than if she’d asked, “Do you want syrup for your pancakes?”
“Of course not!” I said so loudly that Bird sidled away.
“Then we should call my brother, Nico,” she said decisively, “although I think he’s in Barcelona. He’s good at this sort of thing.”
I didn’t ask “What sort of thing?” Some questions you just don’t want answered.
“Are you okay?” She straightened and brushed dust and horse hair from her jeans, her blue eyes fixed on mine.
I saw real concern in her expression and smiled to reassure her. “About being arrested or about Rafe?”
“Rafe,” she said.
“Not really,” I admitted, trying to still my lower lip, which wanted to tremble. “I thought I hated him, but-And he was killed in my house! Well, in the studio, but it’s part of my house. And-” And now I’d have to run Graysin Motion by myself and I hated the money end of the studio, and I didn’t have a dance partner, and I might get arrested and spend the rest of my life in prison, teaching the cha-cha to a gaggle of hard women doing time for stabbing their pimps or dismembering abusive spouses.
Mom seemed to understand all that without my having to spell it out. She patted my hand-a rare gesture of physical affection for her-and gave me her generalpurpose prescription for all ills, physical or mental: “Let’s go for a ride.”
I picked up a fold of my patio dress and waved it at her. “In this?”
“You can borrow my old jodhpurs, and a pair of boots. Luckily, our feet are the same size.”
Yes, but I was four inches taller than she was. However, I obediently followed her into the house to change.
It was late afternoon before I finally drove home, weary from the ride and knowing my legs and ass would punish me the next day, but feeling more relaxed than I had since finding Rafe. Horses are simple creatures-big, beautiful, and brave, but blissfully simple-and I’d enjoyed rebonding with Bird. And Mom. She, too, was easy to be with because the only things she was interested in were horses and international dressage competition and related topics. She had no interest in politics-she probably couldn’t name the governor and would be interested in foreign relations only if it impacted her ability to compete overseas-and even less in popular culture.
I didn’t see any police loitering on my doorstep, so I pulled into the narrow alley that ran behind the row houses and maneuvered my Beetle under the carport’s sagging roof. I’d barely made it through the rear door into the kitchen when the doorbell summoned me to the front of the house. “Coming,” I called, figuring it was Danielle with dinner. Good thing, too, because I was starving.
I flung the door open to see detectives Lissy and Troy and two uniformed officers. I felt myself flush red and then pale as little shivers vibrated through my body. Sherry Indrebo had been right-the police were here to arrest me. My mouth opened but no sounds came out. Detective Lissy held up some folded sheets of paper. His red lips glistened moistly and I stared at them, unable to refocus.
“We have a search warrant,” he said, slapping the pages into the hand I automatically extended. “For your personal quarters, your car, and the dance studio.” When I didn’t move, too shocked to make my feet work, he added, “You have to let us in.”
I stepped aside, and the four of them entered. Detective Lissy provided some low-voiced instructions and they split up. I finally found my voice as Lissy pulled on a pair of thin latex gloves, either because he was afraid of germs or because it was police procedure. “What are you looking for?”
“The gun,” he said. “The murder weapon. It’s all in there, Miss Graysin.” He nodded at the papers I clutched.
“Can I call a lawyer?” I asked with absolutely no idea who I would call. There were a couple of lawyers in my classes, but I thought one of them mostly did estate stuff and the other was legal counsel of some sort for the Department of Defense.
“You may call whomever you choose, but we still get to search your house.” His nose wrinkled and he sneezed, pulling a handkerchief out of a pocket just in time. Four more sneezes followed. When he quit sneezing, he sniffed the air suspiciously. “What is that smell?”
“Horse.”
“I’m allergic to horses.” He glared at me from watery eyes like I’d deliberately socialized with horses to trigger his allergies.
“There’s some Benadryl in the bathroom,” I said. “Feel free to help yourself while you’re rooting through the medicine cabinet.” I carried the papers into the kitchen, where I sat at my table and read them. The female cop went through all my drawers and cabinets methodically as I scanned the pages, which boiled down to what Lissy had already told me: The cops could search my premises and my car for a.22-caliber gun.
“How do you know what kind of gun you’re looking for?” I asked as the cop pawed through the cleaning supplies under my sink. All I could see was her broad rear end in unflattering uniform slacks.
“Autopsy results,” she said. She withdrew from the under-sink cabinet and turned to look at me, brushing a strand of brown hair out of her eyes.
An image of a saw cutting through Rafe’s skull flashed into my mind and I shook my head to clear it. “Oh,” I said in a small voice.
“You could call someone to be here with you,” the woman suggested. “It’s got to be hard having us invade your home like this.”
Her compassion surprised me and I smiled at her. “Thanks. I think I’ll do that.” I dialed Danielle’s number and learned she was only a couple of miles from the house, picking up deli salads at a grocery store. I explained about the search. “Get some ice cream, too,” I suggested, after she promised she’d hurry over.
“Ice cream?” Danielle’s astonishment came through loud and clear. “You never eat ice cream.”
“I do. Every time the police tear my house apart trying to prove I killed my fiancé,” I said.
“Ex-fiancé.”
“Triple Caramel Chunk.” I covered the phone’s mouthpiece. “Do you want some ice cream?” I asked the cop who was now shifting cans in my pantry to see if I’d squirreled a gun behind the bag of petrified marshmallows or in the rice canister.
“Can’t,” she said, “but thanks.” She shot me a half smile over her shoulder and then turned back to hefting my cereal boxes.
Danielle and I had finished dinner, half a bottle of Riesling, and most of our pints of Ben and Jerry’s when the police finished up. Lissy’s disgruntled expression told me they hadn’t found anything and I let out a huge sigh of relief. “Buh-bye,” I said cheerily as the four of them filed out the front door. Lissy sneezed as he passed me and grudgingly told me I could resume classes the next day.
I closed and locked the door behind them and turned to see Danielle surveying the mussed-up living room, hands on her hips. “You’d think they’d at least pick up after themselves,” she said.
“I’m just glad they’re gone and I’m not spending the night in jail,” I said, bending to shove the sofa cushions back into place. Danielle straightened books on the shelves near the fireplace.
We worked for some minutes in silence before Danielle said, “He asked me out again.” Her voice was muffled as she bent over to pick up a book.
I knew “he” was Danielle’s boss, a portly man in his early forties who was separated from his wife. He’d been after a date with Danielle since his wife moved out. I was actually grateful to be able to talk about something besides Rafe’s death and my status as chief suspect.
“Did you tell him about Coop like we talked about?”
“Yes, and I put a photo of Coop and me on my desk and everything, but Jonah doesn’t care.” She slotted a dictionary onto the shelf with more force than necessary.
“You need to talk to HR.” I’d suggested this at least six times since Jonah started coming on to her.
“I can’t.”
“What would you tell an administrative assistant who came to you with the same situation?”
“Talk to HR,” she admitted reluctantly, “and document everything.”
“Sooo…?”
“I need this job.” She’d recently bought a new Prius and the payments were killing her.
“How about a nanny cam, then?” The idea came to me in a flash of inspiration. “Set it up in your office and videotape Jonah the next time he suggests a romantic dinner for two.”
“Be serious,” Danielle said huffily. “You’ve never had a real job, so you don’t understand.”
“Ballroom dancing is a real job,” I said heatedly, turning to face her with my hands on my hips. “And running a small business of any kind takes more work than the average union employee puts in in a year. And there’s no one looking out for my interests, making sure I get health benefits and regular coffee breaks and safe working conditions.” She started to interrupt, but I talked over her. “And I have to get students to toe the line while we’re rumba-ing romantically or while I’m shaking my assets in a costume that’s more fringe than fabric. So don’t tell me I don’t know about real jobs or workplace harassment.”
“Fine,” Danielle said, her lips a thin line.
“Fine.”
I thought she might walk out, leaving me to cope with the rest of the mess on my own, but she continued to help, moving with me into my bedroom once we’d finished straightening the living room.
“You could kick Jonah in the cojones,” I suggested after another ten minutes of “you pissed me off” silence.
She made a mrmph sound that might’ve been a stifled laugh.
“Or cut a photo out of Playgirl and leave it on his desk with a pair of scissors stabbed through the model’s Mr. Happy.”
She laughed aloud at that and flung a pillow at me. “You are warped.”
Grinning with satisfaction at having gotten her to laugh, I told her about Sherry Indrebo’s call and my visit to Rafe’s condo.
“Did you tell the police?” she asked.
“Are you kidding? I was grateful to get out of Rafe’s without running into them. I was hardly going to call them up and say that while I was sneaking around his place I found out someone else was sneaking around his place.”
“I can see how that would be awkward,” Danielle admitted. “But you had a key, so it’s not like you broke in.”
“I didn’t see any signs that the other person broke in, either,” I said, “so maybe she had a key, too.”
“Who do you think it was?”
I stopped closing dresser drawers to give it some thought. “A woman,” I said, “since there was lipstick on the mug. I don’t see how it could’ve been Sherry Indrebo’cause I practically went straight to Rafe’s after talking to her. She couldn’t have beaten me there. Solange, maybe? They were dating, after all.”
“Or some other girlfriend,” Danielle said.
“Taryn, maybe, or-” My thoughts flew to the limo that had lurked out front.
“Taryn?”
I realized I hadn’t told Danielle about Leon Hall’s visit and his accusation.
“A sixteen-year-old?” Danielle asked doubtfully when I finished filling her in. “That doesn’t sound like Rafe.”
I was relieved that she agreed with me. It was bad enough that my character judgment was so poor I’d gotten engaged to a man whose concept of “fidelity” began and ended with investments, but I hated to think I’d been in love with a guy slimy enough-criminal, really-to seduce a sixteen-year-old. I ducked into the roomy closet Great-aunt Laurinda had created by knocking down a wall into the adjoining room, originally a tiny nursery, and began pairing my shoes up and returning them to the shoe rack. Really, how did the police think anyone could hide a gun in a size-eight satin sandal?
“It had to be Solange,” I said.
When Danielle didn’t answer, I left the closet to find her stacking towels in my bathroom, a space not much bigger than the pantry, with a wooden-seated toilet, a clawfoot bathtub surmounted by a shower head that drizzled rather than sprayed, and the glass shelves I’d installed myself and thus they slanted just a tad so the towels slid off after a couple of days.
“Why do you suppose Solange was there?” Danielle asked when I told her the conclusion I’d reached. She answered her own question. “I suppose for the same reason you were, to remove incrim-personal things before the police arrived.” She cast me a guilty look from under her bangs.
I let the word “incriminating” slide past. “I’m going to have it out with her tomorrow,” I announced, “and find out just what she was up to.”
Friday morning found me mopping the floor in the main studio where Rafe had lain, dressed in a paint-stained green T-shirt, short shorts, and with my hair up in a messy ponytail. The police had given me the name of a company that specialized in crime scene cleanup, but their rates were more than I could stomach and I decided to tackle the distasteful task myself. Even with wood floors, not carpet or tile with easy-to-stain grout, it took me several buckets of water, lots of lemony cleanser, and some elbow grease to get a result I was happy with. Stepping back to see if I’d gotten it all, I noticed a streak by the wall and aimed the mop toward it.
“Excuse me,” an accented male voice said from the doorway.
I whirled around, mop held level like a lance, and saw a tall, dark man step into the room. The light slanting through the front windows made it hard to see his features, but then he moved closer and I gasped, the mop dropping from my nerveless fingers. Rafe.