Room Service

11

MUCH LATER, JACOB WALKED Em to her hotel room. She didn’t know what she expected but it wasn’t for him to follow her inside.

The light on her phone was blinking, so she picked it up to retrieve her messages, feeling a little self-conscious and a lot aware of the big, bad, silent man behind her, watching her every move.

What they’d just shared had been so intense, she didn’t know how to react. Just remembering how she’d cried and panted, and damn it, begged, had the heat rushing to her face. Plus she was fairly certain she’d embedded her fingernails in his most excellent posterior, which meant that he had ten indentations in there.

Did he even know? If he didn’t, surely he realized she’d bitten him on the shoulder in those last few seconds, when she’d practically burst out of her own skin. She’d left teeth prints; she’d seen it herself when he’d put his shirt back on.

God. She’d turned into a wild animal.

She had no idea how she was going to look him in the eyes ever again. You won’t have to tomorrow, when you leave. Her heart clenched at that but she ruthlessly shoved the thought aside as she accessed her messages. She had two, the first from a desperate-sounding Eric.

“Your assistant has lost her mind,” he hissed. “She’s pounding on my room door, wanting in. Do you hear her?”

Indeed Em could hear some sort of knocking.

“I can see her through the peephole,” Eric said desperately. “And good Christ, you should see what she’s wearing. Nearly nothing, if you’re wondering!” His voice cracked. “I know I promised you I’d resist her but that was when she was drunk. She’s not drunk now, and I don’t think I’m going to stay strong, Em. Either call me and remind me why I’m not having sex with her, or don’t be upset at the consequences.”

Click.

Em stared at the phone and made a sound of worry. She’d wanted them to get back together, but only if they were both ready. The past few days had told her Liza wasn’t, and might never be. The fool.

“What’s wrong?” Jacob asked.

“Nothing.” Except her best friend was going to gobble up her other best friend, and then spit him out like yesterday’s trash. It was Liza’s MO: love them and leave them before they did the same to her.

Until Eric, no one had ever gotten hurt.

But now Liza had the poor man ensnared for the second time. Eric had a heart of gold behind all that sarcastic wit, and Em was worried.

The next message was Liza herself. “Don’t bother coming down here and saving him,” she said. “I’ve got him right where I want him, and let me just say all these toys in the closets here at Hush are coming in handy.”

Em listened to this and felt the impending train wreck.

“I’ve found some silk scarves in the armoire here, and I don’t think they’re meant to wear for a walk in the park. I’ve got him tied to the bed. He’s a willing captive, though, so don’t worry. I’m going to take good care of him.”

Click.

Em hung up the phone and told herself they were both grown-ups. They could handle the consequences…

“Em?”

She turned to Jacob, and while she didn’t quite manage to look him in the eyes, she settled her gaze on his chest. “Liza has Eric tied up in his room. Literally.”

His eyes heated.

In response, something happened deep in her belly. To cover the confusing reaction, she laughed a little nervously. “What is it about this place? It brings out the animal in people.”

“Is that what you think happened upstairs?” His voice was as intoxicating as whiskey. “The ambience got to us?”

“I’m not sure,” she admitted.

He came toward her, tossing her brown bag onto the table-she’d nearly forgotten her purchase!-and put his hands on his hips as he looked at her and said, “Again.”

“Wh-what?”

“Again,” he said, and made her nipples hard and her panties wet.

Yes. Oh, yes, she wanted him again.

And again.

But he was talking about right here, right now. She also wanted him tomorrow. And the next day. And, she was beginning to realize, the tomorrows after that.

But what did he want? Certainly not that kind of tie, and knowing it should have given her pause, should have stopped her.

It didn’t.

Her heart nearly burst as she tossed her room key aside and flung herself at him, sighing with pleasure when he caught her up in his arms. She could feel the barely restrained need in him, and thought maybe, just maybe, he wanted more, too.

It was enough for her.

“Let me,” he said, dodging her fingers when she reached to get his shirt off. Instead he kissed her until she was dying for more, holding her hands behind her back while he decimated her with his mouth, his hands, his body.

“Let me,” he whispered again, when finally, finally, he stripped her down to her skin. This time, he murmured with pleasure over every inch he uncovered, taking the time to touch her, to taste her.

And then he just took her, which he did in the hot tub.

“Again,” he repeated later when he took her on the counter.

Then the rug on the floor.

And then even later, on the chair by the window overlooking the bright lights of the city that never sleeps.

They finally fell onto the bed somewhere around three, where Jacob pulled her against his warm, hard body and fell instantly asleep.

She stared into his face, relaxed as he slept, and felt her heart click into place. She could love this man. She could love him forever, if he’d let her.

But she already knew he wouldn’t. He might think he’d kept the reins tight on his emotions tonight, hiding from her how he was starting to feel, hiding his fear of letting go, of giving her control and losing his, but he hadn’t really kept a thing from her.

A surge of emotion for him welled up and filled her heart and her eyes. Leaning in, she put her lips softly to his. “Night,” she whispered.

He hummed in pleasure and tightened his grip on her without waking all the way. With a dreamy sigh, she snuggled in and let sleep claim her, too.

AN ALARM WENT OFF and Jacob jerked awake. He was in a bed, a strange bed, with a delicious, warm, naked female body plastered to his side.

Not just any bed, and not just any woman.

Hush.

Em.

He had a handful of breast with a nipple pebbling in his palm, his other hand cupping a warm buttock. Nice. Rumbling approval deep in his throat, he rolled her to her back, settling his weight on her, thrusting a thigh high between hers to spread her for his pleasure.

“The alarm,” she gasped.

Reaching out, he knocked the clock to the floor and it went mercifully silent.

“Auditions,” she mumbled, eyes still closed. “I have to-Ohmigod.”

Having sucked a nipple into his mouth, he teased the tip with his tongue, smiling at her moan, at the way she clutched at him with her hands, her legs.

“Jacob-”

Lightly he bit down on her nipple, then flicked it with his tongue.

Her fingers dug into the muscles of his shoulder, her body arching up into him.

Oh, yeah. Good. His slid his hand down her side, spreading his fingers wide to touch all that he could, her ribs, her belly, her hip. “Wait,” she gasped.

He palmed her sweet ass, then dipped his fingers in-

“Jacob.”

For the first time he heard the tone in her voice. The reluctant tone. The tone he’d used often enough the morning after when he’d had enough of a woman and needed out.

That was when he woke all the way up and smelled the news.

She was done with him.

She was done with him before he’d been done with her. That had never happened, not once, and a feather could have knocked him over he was so shocked. “Right.” Without looking into her eyes, he rolled off her and off the bed all in one move. Reached for his jeans.

“Jacob.”

Where the hell were his shoes?

“Jacob.”

“Don’t get up,” he said, shoving his legs into his jeans and grabbing his shirt. “I know my way out.”

Did he ever. He always knew his way out, and was pissed he’d stayed.

Sex with a woman, he could do that. He knew how to do it, extremely well.

Sleeping with one, not so much. In fact, he rarely did it at all, and never on a woman’s turf.

Seems he’d broken all his own rules last night.

That’s what he got for thinking with the wrong head.

The paper bag on the dresser mocked him. It was open, the packaging of the vibrator strewn over the glossy wood.

They’d put that thing to some fun, sexy, outrageous use, and if his heart hadn’t been pounding heavily, uncomfortably, the memories of what they’d done would have made him smile.

As it was, they made him hard.

Because after her initial shyness, Em had gotten into it. Very into it. The batteries were close to dead.

Damn, he was thinking again.

He made it to the door before he felt her hand on his arm, trying to tug him around. He stared at his own hand on the handle. “Don’t, Em.”

“Look at me,” she said softly, her hand rising to glide over his back. He felt his muscles quiver at the touch.

“Please?” she whispered.

Gritting his teeth, he turned only his head and met her eyes. They were deep and full not of discomfort or irritation at him still being here but hope and joy and, damn, that knee-knocking affection again.

She hadn’t run off like a scared little bunny at the depths of his passion. Hadn’t run from anything he’d shown her, as he’d assumed-and half hoped-she would. He didn’t understand what drew him to her, why he suddenly wanted to toss her back into that bed and follow her down, why he wanted to keep her.

Keep her.

He couldn’t keep her. Even thinking it was the stupidest thought he’d ever had. He’d never managed to keep anything in his life, not a place, not a thing, and sure as hell not a person.

“Last night,” Em said, searching his gaze for something, God knew what. “It was…different.”

He let out a harsh laugh. “Yeah. I’m guessing not a lot of guys would take you to a porn shop.”

“That wasn’t all that was different.”

“You probably don’t do a lot of barhopping, either. At least the kind of bar I took you to.”

“I didn’t mean different bad.” She looked at him as if she could see right through him, damn it, into the very black depths of his soul. “I meant different…scary.”

Scary? He’d scared her? Christ. “Em…” He squeezed his eyes closed tight. “I didn’t mean to…I wouldn’t-”

“No.” She turned him to face her, both hands on his arms. “No.” She smiled. “Scary good. I’m trying to tell you that I had the most amazing time, and yes it was different, and yes it scared me because it was different. Different as in more meaningful. What we shared last night when we made love-”

“Wait.” He shook his head. God, he couldn’t let her finish. “I think you should stop right there. Before you say something you’re going to regret in the name of lust.”

“It wasn’t just lust.”

“Yes,” he said. “It was. It was just a normal night of lust.”

“Oh.” She blinked once, the hurt in those depths unmistakable. “I see.”

Hell. He should have left last night. He was a complete idiot. “I don’t want to hurt you-”

“No. No, it’s okay. I understand. It was a casual thing.”

“That’s right. Just a normal night out-”

“I get it.” She nodded. She took her hands from his arms. Backed up a step. Even curved her mouth into a smile.

Though it didn’t come close to reaching her eyes.

“Don’t worry,” she said, trying to soothe him, which made him feel even more like slime. “I’m fine.”

From somewhere behind them her cell phone rang and she jerked as if she’d been shot. “Excuse me, I’ve got to get that-”

“Yeah. Uh…good luck with your auditions.” At his own lame words, he winced. Good luck? Could he be a bigger ass? “Em-”

But she’d already turned away.

Just as he’d wanted.

EM PICKED UP her ringing cell phone. When she heard her hotel room door close behind Jacob, she closed her eyes. He was gone…

Just a normal night out.

She was such a fool, such a damn fool, she thought angrily as she flipped open her phone. “Hello?”

“Em.”

“Eric.” She let out a breath and concentrated on the here and now. “I take it you’re not still…tied up.”

“Uh, no.” He lowered his voice. “Look, it was great. But…”

“But what?”

“Afterward…” He sighed. “She cried, Em. It broke my heart.”

“Why are you whispering?”

“Because she’s asleep right next to me. Why did she cry?”

Em sank to the bed. “Did you ask her?”

“She denied doing it, but I saw the tears.”

“What happened after that?”

“We, uh, did it again. It was…well, words fail,” he said in an awed voice. “Not the sex, the connection, you know?”

Yeah. She knew.

“I fell in love with her all over again.”

Em let out a long breath. She was falling, too.

“God,” Eric whispered. “I think she’s just screwing with my head. What do I do?”

She laughed a little harshly. “Eric, what in our history together makes you think that I have any clue when it comes to love?”

“Because your heart’s always in the right place. You’re all about heart and soul, Em, making memories, shit like that.”

“Yeah, well, I’m really a pretty big screwup in that area. Right now all that matters is that we’re going to be unemployed and eating canned soup for the rest of our lives if I don’t get downstairs and get going on the auditions-”

“She cried, Em.”

Em rubbed her aching temples. Other things ached, too. Between her thighs.

But the biggest ache of all came from her heart, which she reached up and rubbed now, though it didn’t help. “If I had to guess, she cried because she loves you, too.”

Utter silence greeted this.

“Eric? You there?”

“She told me she doesn’t.”

“Even you are not that clueless as to believe her.”

“Look, I’m just a guy,” he pleaded. “We were born clueless.”

“Okay, listen, I haven’t had caffeine, and my night was…well.” She drew a deep breath. “But I think she just doesn’t know how to deal with the love she feels for you, or even how to show it. Tying you up was symbolic. You get it? You’re hers. You’re tied to her. You see?”

He was quiet for a moment. “I guess.”

“You know what happened before. The two of you were too hot, too heavy. You didn’t share the stuff that scared you. You didn’t do the things you need to do to make it last.”

“Yeah.”

“You burned it out.”

“I know.” He sounded terrified. “I don’t want that to happen again.”

“Then do more than the wild sex. Talk. Communicate. Listen to each other. Be there for each other.”

“I can do that. But pinning Liza down is hard. She’s not exactly the communicative type.”

“Well, turnaround is fair play,” she said, quoting Jacob.

He paused. “You mean…tie her up?”

“Give the boy an A.”

He laughed softly. “Gotcha. Now tell me about your night. You have a bad one?”

Bad? No. Good? No. Try the best night of her entire life. “Hard to explain.” Especially since, for Jacob, it had all been…“normal.” Heat filled her face at that. Bastard.

From its perch still on her floor, the alarm clock went off again, and she sighed. “We’ve got to get a move on. Get up. Get Liza up. Meet me in the conference room for round two.”

“Oh, boy,” Eric said. “Here we go again.”

Yeah. Here we go.

THOUGH HE COULD HAVE showered and changed at Hush, Jacob went back to his apartment. Right now he wanted to be in his own space. But as he climbed the three flights of stairs, he knew the problem wasn’t the outside world, but the thoughts racing inside his own head.

He wished he was still in bed with Em. He wished she was tucked beneath him, while he was buried deep inside her, taking them both to that nameless place of abandon they’d been to several times in the night.

How many women had he been with? Many, and not once when a woman had called out his name while lost in passion had he stopped just to watch her.

With Em, he hadn’t been able to tear his eyes away. He loved the way she arched up, her throat open and vulnerable, the way she panted his name in that serrated, husky voice that always sounded so…surprised.

Yeah, that was it. Every time she’d come, she’d been honestly surprised.

Watching her unravel had the been the sexiest, most erotically charged experience of his entire life.

Then morning had come and she had wanted to obsess and tear it all apart and look for the meaning.

And he’d hurt her.

Damn it, he knew he had, but at the time he hadn’t cared. He’d been choking, panicking, as he’d stared at her, wanting nothing more than to haul her close, bury his face in her hair, and not let go.

Never let go.

He scrubbed his hands over his face but the longing remained. And he didn’t know what to do with it. Why wasn’t it gone? Why hadn’t one night been enough? One night had to be enough.

He came to the landing outside his front door and stared in surprise at Pru, who was sitting there waiting for him. “I’m going crazy,” she said, and rose to her feet.

Jacob unlocked his door, shaking his head when Pru pushed ahead of him and entered.

“Come on in,” he said dryly.

“Did you hear me?” She whirled to face him, her neat, long braid nearly blinding him. “I’m losing it here.”

“Join the club.” He stood in the middle of his living room, glancing toward his shower with longing.

“Jacob.”

He sighed. “What’s happened?”

“Everything. Nothing.”

Jacob squinted at her. “Is that in English?”

“We went out last night, Caya and I. And at the end I kissed her. Caya kissed me back, and I’m telling you, it was real. It was love-”

“Pru-”

“It was,” she insisted.

“How do you even know the difference between lust and love?”

She looked startled at the question. “I just do.”

“You’re going to have to do better than that.”

“Okay, well…lust can be sated. Lust is gone when you wake up the next morning. Lust doesn’t have those bone-deep terrifying feelings, like you have to see that person again or your life is never going to be the same.”

Something pinged deep in Jacob’s gut. It felt like worry, but that couldn’t be it because he never worried. Nothing had ever been worth worrying over. “Sounds like nothing another night of sex wouldn’t cure.”

“No.” Eyes sad, Pru shook her head. “See, you’d think so, but then you get there, and you do it again, and it’s only worse.”

Shit. Shit. She was wrong. She had to be wrong. “Maybe some lust is just more stubborn than others.”

“Honey, lust is a fickle bitch, but one thing she isn’t is stubborn.”

He stared at her, dread clawing its way up his throat. “I see.”

Someone knocked at his door. Turning his back on Pru, he opened it and found Caya.

She had wet eyes and a matching misery on her face. Aw, hell. “I suppose you want to join-”

She stuck a finger into his pec, poking hard. “Did you tell Pru she should tell me how she felt about me?”

“Uh-” He glanced back at Pru over his shoulder, but she’d moved out of sight from Caya, flattening herself back against the wall, shaking her head no, looking panicked that Caya might see her.

He’d known this was going to come back and bite him on the ass. He turned to Caya, still on his doorstep. “Look, I don’t think I should get involved-”

“Well, it’s too late now!”

“Caya-” He stopped helplessly when a tear spilled over. “Aw, no. Don’t-”

She burst into tears.

“Goddamn it.” He pulled her in for a hug, turning her away from seeing into his apartment, though it didn’t matter because Pru had vanished into his bathroom. Now that she was out of sight, he moved Caya inside because he figured there was no chance in hell either of them was going away anytime soon.

“See, you do care,” Caya sniffed against him.

“Just a little.”

She pulled back and looked into his face. “Look at that, admitting it didn’t make you choke.”

He frowned. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means you’re just as screwed up as me when it comes to letting people love you, and loving them back.” Caya swiped at her wet cheek. “I’m sorry. I know I’m freaking out here, and taking it out on you.” She covered her eyes, then dropped her hands to her sides. “Pru said she loved me.”

“I know.”

“She wants me to tell her how I feel back, but what the hell do I know about this stuff?”

“You’re asking me?”

Caya laughed. “Yeah. Fine mess, huh? So do you think it’s screwed up that I…sort of love her back?”

“Well, I-” Jacob broke off when the bathroom door behind them opened.

Pru stepped out, hand over her mouth as she stared at Caya.

At the sight of her, Caya jerked as if shot. “Y-you’re…here.”

Pru nodded, her eyes filling.

“You…heard me,” Caya whispered.

“‘Sort of’?” Pru whispered.

Caya swallowed. “More than sort of.”

Pru’s eyes filled. “Oh, my God.”

“I didn’t want to love you,” Caya said. “I tried not to. But you’re it for me.”

Pru’s eyes overflowed, and there was so much hope on her face, it hurt Jacob to look at her. “What about men-”

“They’re great, but not what I want.”

“Caya, my God. Are you sure?”

“Very. Besides, most men are maturity challenged. Sorry,” she said to Jacob. “No offense intended.”

“None taken,” he said dryly.

Caya turned back to Pru. “I’ve been out there, I know what’s waiting. I don’t want any of it, men or other women. Just you.”

They reached for each other in an embrace so real, so raw, Jacob had to close his eyes.

When he opened them, they were kissing.

“So.” He cleared his throat. “I guess you can both go now.”

They kept kissing, passionately. Jacob figured it was a fantasy of men everywhere but for him it only felt like salt on a wound he couldn’t see. “You know what? Never mind. I’ll go.”

They just kept at it, as if they didn’t need air, didn’t need anyone but themselves.

Jacob grabbed his keys and walked out of his own damn apartment.