Savage Guns

TWELVE

Next thing I knew, there was Judge Nippers steaming over from the Puma County Courthouse with something clutched in his gnarled fingers. I sure knew what it was.

“This, this insult to my divine spark, was hanging from my doorknob,” he said, shaking the little cord noose that was a brother of the one hanging on our door.

“Guess someone’s of a mind to string you up,” I said. “You got any objections?”

I got to give credit to the old boy. He grinned at me like a snapping turtle. “Now and then,” he said.

“You see anyone in the courthouse?” I asked.

“That mausoleum, you could fire grapeshot down the halls and never hit a live mortal during business hours,” he said. “No, I don’t have the slightest idea, and no one else over there does either. I asked the same question.”

“There’s been a few nooses put here and there,” I said. “One real one hanging in my horse stall at the livery barn. Another hanging from the doorknob at my office.”

“Hardly know which side’s having all the fun,” Nippers said. “But I’m ordering the gallows built for half a dozen. If they want hangings, they’ll get more than they bargained for.” There was something real bright in that old prune of a face. “You got any notions?”

“Admiral Bragg’s crew was in town, but they’re gone. There ain’t a T-Bar man in sight.”

“Tell me about your nooses,” the judge said.

“One was hanging from a rafter above my horse. A real one, thick hemp, put there by someone that could climb up there and tie it down. These here little ones, anyone could slide them onto a knob.”

“Which side, do you figure?”

“Admiral Bragg’s outfit already threatened me if I hang the kid. They’re just making sure I get the message.”

“What about Crayfish Ruble?”

“Well, what about him? It’s not his boy gonna stretch rope. He told me the other day, all he cares about is getting it done. Justice. His men were kilt so he wants justice.”

“Any threats from Ruble?”

“Not toward me or you. It’s the Anchor Ranch they’re thinking about. If Admiral Bragg’s bunch bust the boy out, there’ll be a war around here. But as long as the hanging goes forward, they’re not getting their drawers in a knot.”

“Get me some proof,” he said. “By gawd, I’ll string up the whole lot.”

He sure was enjoying himself. He twirled his noose around like it was a trophy, and then stuffed it into the pants of his ancient suit, probably the only one he owned. Nippers patted the bulk bulging from his breast pocket.

“You think a pepperbox can’t hit what it’s aimed at?” he asked.

Actually, that was pretty much true to what I knew about them. I nodded.

“Well, I’ll show you a thing or two!”

He whipped that miserable firearm out of some pocket down inside his bosom, and began eyeing targets.

“No!” I yelled.

But he just ignored me, and finally settled on some dodgers that had been pinned to the rear wall because I thought them fellers looked familiar to me.

“Judge, put that thing down!”

But he was squinting along the top of that handheld Gatling.

Bam! A slug cut through an eyeball of Lorenzo Baca. Bam! The lips of Rattlesnake Billy vanished. Wham! The forehead of Art Hammer was perforated.

Judge Nippers blew smoke away and smiled. “It’s all in the practice,” he said. “I’ll leave two chambers loaded to give me fangs.” And with that, he plunged outside.

“Don’t know as I’ve seen the like,” Burtell said. “Them things put lead everywhere but straight ahead.”

Judge Nippers sure was an entertainment all by himself. The smell of gun smoke lingered in the office. I went and looked at them dodgers. Nippers hadn’t missed a shot. He’d nailed Baca, sure enough. It occurred to me that Baca looked a lot like Rocco, one of them three that King Bragg had sent to heaven, or wherever. I thought maybe I’d write the sheriff down in Refugio County, New Mexico, and see if Baca ever used another name.

I’d had about enough of Admiral Bragg’s meddling, and thought maybe to take a couple of deputies out there to Anchor Ranch and haul his skinny butt into town. The best place for the boss of the Anchor Ranch was in the cell next to his boy. I wouldn’t have no trouble rigging up a few charges to hold him on.

I headed into the cell block to make sure King Bragg was all right. He was lying on his bunk.

“I heard some shots,” the boy said.

“Judge Nippers making a believer of me,” I said.

“I wish he’d saved one for me. Get it over with.”

“How come you went to the Last Chance that day?” I asked.

“Make some trouble.”

“How’d you know there’d be any T-Bar men in there?”

“They told me.”

“Who told you?”

He stared at the wall. “I don’t know. I had too much to drink.”

“Someone told you?”

“Yeah, someone said there was some T-Bar hands looking for a fight, and if I dodged it, they’d know what to think of me.”

“A fistfight?”

He stared at me. “What does it matter? I walked into it.”

“You went alone, looking for a brawl with that bunch?”

“I guess so.”

“Something don’t add up, King.”

“You ever been called a coward, Sheriff?”

“Mostly, they call me lazy. My ma, she used to scold me—”

“Not what I asked.”

He irritated me. “Yeah, a few times. Made me mad.”

“I’m not one. I’m not afraid of dying,” he said. “If you were in my shoes, would you be?”

“I’m not in your shoes,” I said.

Then he turned his back to me. He was just counting the minutes and hours left to him. Or trying not to.

I kept wanting to palaver with him, but he clammed up, so nothing came of it. I hiked out of the jail and locked the door, and thought I’d patrol the town. Burtell would be on until supper, and then DeGraff would come in for the night.

“I’m going out,” I said.

“Better than sitting around,” he replied.

I opened the door and discovered a regular parade out there, a mess of horsemen all heading my way. And Crayfish himself was leading the pack, on a ewe-necked gray horse that should have been sold for wolf bait.

Them fellers was armed to the teeth. Most had a pair of six-guns strapped to their waists, and most of the others had rifles or shotguns sheathed or in hand. A few had regular bandoliers loaded with shiny brass hanging over a shoulder. This here was a regular army. Worse, they spread out in a way that looked like they was priming for action.

“Crayfish, if there’s trouble, you’ll be answering first,” I said.

He knew what I meant. “That word, answering, is an interesting allusion,” he said. “Actually, well done and interesting syntax. My congratulations.”

I just about had a fit, but all I could do was snarl some.

Crayfish smiled easily. “We’ve appointed ourselves your posse,” he said. “We are going to keep the peace in Doubtful until the hanging is over.”

“What are you mouthing about?”

“A posse, we’re a posse, Sheriff. We’re an armed body of men acting in an official capacity on behalf of the legally constituted law officers of Puma County, Wyoming.”

“You ain’t nothing until I swear you,” I said, “and right now you’re not keeping any peace around here.”

“Ah, Sheriff, you don’t quite comprehend. Our town is under siege. Anchor Ranch, in all its power and glory, threatens to perform a lawless act. Namely, breaking the young multiple murderer spawned by its owner out of your lockup and spiriting him away from the majestic reach of the law.”

“He ain’t getting out, and I can take care of it myself,” I said. “We don’t need a posse.”

Crayfish smiled. “Well, you’ve got one. I’ve leased the upstairs of Rosie’s Parlor for the duration, and that will be the T-Bar headquarters until justice is done.”

“Sounds more like the T-Bar’s hindquarters, Crayfish.”

“That too. My main worry is that my staff will be too weary to perform its duties adequately. We will need alert and ready men to patrol the streets, guard the courthouse and especially rim your jail with stouthearted stalwarts. A week or two upstairs at Rosie’s might gravely weaken my force, but that is a risk to be endured.”

“Some risk,” I said.

“At any rate, Sheriff, the T-Bar posse will be patrolling Doubtful day and night. We will ensure good order at the Sampling Room and other watering holes. We will ensure that no illicit armies of the night sweep into your understaffed jail and attempt to spirit away the prisoner. We will, of course, frisk all visitors to the jail, making sure that lawyers and such don’t smuggle instruments of violence within. And of course we plan to accompany you on your daily rounds. Henceforth, wherever you go, two of my best men will be serving as your deputies, lockstep with you. Two other trusted men will protect Judge Nippers and the courthouse. Nothing will escape their attention.”

“Thanks, Crayfish, but I’ll just handle it all myself. I don’t need your posse.”

He smiled. “Well, your thoughts are noble, and your skills are unquestioned, and your bravery is legendary, but we’re here, and we’re staying, and we’re protecting Doubtful until justice is served, and you’ll find me at Rosie’s henceforth.”

“How about you just get out of town and leave the peacekeeping to those that got a badge?”

He simply smiled. “See you around, fella,” he said.

Well, that was the damnedest thing I ever did see.

He waved his hand, and all them horsemen wheeled around. A pair of them dismounted and posted themselves in front of the jail, two more headed for the courthouse, while the rest hightailed for the livery barn and Rosie’s. I thought the ones ordered to guard my office and jailhouse drew straws and lost. The rest of that bunch was gonna get acquainted with Rosie’s ladies. That was going to be a hell-raising time, but it was legal and there wasn’t anything I should do about it except maybe try not to be envious.

Well, there they were, two ranch hands smiling at me like they was being friends. Only thing was, I sure didn’t know what direction that pair of bores would be pointing toward.

“You ain’t coming in,” I said, and knocked.

Burtell opened a crack, and I slid in and bolted up.

“What was all that?” he asked.

“Crayfish’s calling it a posse. I’m calling it trouble.”

I filled him in on all that. He just stood there and whistled.

“I don’t know what I’m gonna do,” I said. “Crayfish says he’s putting two deputies, that’s what he called them, on me so I can’t go take a leak without a pair of T-Bar rannies tagging along. It sure’s a problem.”

Burtell laughed. “We’ve been had,” he said.

It was time to put my thinking cap on, which was a futile idea. Truth to tell, I didn’t have no idea what to do. The town got took over. That smart-talking bastard was two jumps ahead of me.

Ruble had taken over. I was a prisoner in my own town. If I stepped out the door, there’d be men shadowing me, seeing what I was up to. If I rode out on Critter, there’d be some of Ruble’s hands following me. If I tried to form a real posse from merchants in town, Ruble’s men would scare them off. There were tough men, strong men in Doubtful, men I’d deputize any time, but no match for the gunslicks on Ruble’s payroll. And it looked like this was going to keep right on for almost two weeks.

I decided I’d just keep on doin’ my duty, do my rounds, keep King Bragg secure inside his cell, see to the safety of them workmen when they put up the gallows, and all. And if anyone interfered, someone was gonna eat some lead.