Shredded

Chapter 2 Ophelia

He doesn’t react right away. And when he does, it’s not at all the way I expect.

Maybe it’s the insulated snowboarding pants or maybe it’s his too-cool attitude, but Z doesn’t screech or yell or even curse. He just looks at me, that too-gorgeous-for-his-own-or-anyone-else’s-good face of his frozen in surprise. Whether it’s because I dumped the drink on him or because he’s finally figured out that I played him, I don’t know and I don’t care. All that matters is he gets the message and leaves me the hell alone.

Still, some instinct deep inside me whispers that not much surprises him. The fact that I did makes me happier than it should.

And then he smiles, and I know I’m right. Because it isn’t that come-sit-on-the-big-bad-wolf’s-lap-and-let-him-take-a-little-bite-out-of-you smile that he leveled at me a few minutes ago, the one that weakened my knees and nearly melted my brain cells along with those of every other female in the vicinity. No, this is a real smile. A genuine grin ripe with amusement, speculation, and something else I can’t even begin to identify.

But whatever that unknown thing is, I’ve been around the block enough to know that I’m in trouble. That this meeting probably won’t end well between us. At least not for me.

Still, what was I supposed to do? Stand here with my heart pounding and my knees knocking together like some kind of ripe-for-the-picking damsel in distress?

Throw myself at him like every other girl in a hundred-mile radius does?

Let him think I’m going to be just another notch on his snowboard?

I don’t think so.

I did what had to be done, nipped his totally impersonal pursuit in the bud before it got completely out of hand. It’s not that I think I’m in any danger of falling for him—rich, pretty boys like Z make me break out in hives, especially when they’re adrenaline junkies. But still, I’m not taking any chances.

Not after what happened in New Orleans.

Just the thought of Louisiana, of Remi, has my stomach churning and my chest aching. I’ve been doing so well, too.

Minding my own business.

Getting my life back in order.

Looking into classes at the community college so I won’t be stuck in this dead-end job—this dead-end life—forever.

At least until Mr. My-Balls-Are-Even-Bigger-than-My-Bank-Account here comes along and decides to mess with me just because he can. Fury burns through my veins at the thought, and I glare at Z. Suddenly I’m itching to dump another cup of coffee on him. One that isn’t iced this time. But I need this job, and already people are pointing and staring. If my aunt or uncle passes by and sees all the commotion, I’ll be out of another job. And seeing as I’ve already gotten banished from the gift shop and one of the restaurants in the twelve days I’ve been here, I’m kind of running out of options.

Annoyed but resigned to doing some kind of damage control, I pull out a clean rag from under the counter and thrust it toward him. “Here. You can use this to clean up.”

“I’ve got it, thanks.” His grin widens, and it only ticks me off to see that my ire amuses him. At least until he reaches for the back neckline of his shirt and pulls it over his head in one smooth movement. By the time he starts dabbing at his black pants with it, my anger is a thing of the past. And so are my brain cells.

I can’t help it. I try to stay pissed, but it’s hard to actually formulate thoughts—any thoughts—when I’m confronted with a half-naked Z.

I mean, the guy’s an alien. He has to be, because human beings just don’t look like this. At least not outside of magazine shoots and Hollywood movies. And maybe not even there.

Despite the winter weather, his skin is a soft, golden bronze that’s a testament to just how much time he spends outside with his shirt off—despite the snow. His arms are big, his shoulders well developed. And his abs. Omigod, his abs are a work of art. Forget six-pack. This guy has an eight-working-on-ten-pack, and for a second—just a second—my eyes nearly cross as I imagine what it would be like to lick a path straight from his collarbone to his navel.

He shifts a little under my scrutiny and for the first time I notice the scars he’s got—on his arm, his chest, over his ribs, down the side of his abs. Way too many scars for a normal guy to have. But he isn’t a normal guy, I remind myself. He’s a snowboarder, one known for taking crazy risks and doing really wild stunts. Is it any wonder his body is so torn up?

Not that the scars make him look bad. Just the opposite. Somehow they only reinforce the beauty of all that hard-packed muscle and golden skin. The same way his ink does. I try to look away, but I can’t. I’m fascinated by the tattoo that covers the entire right half of his upper body. It’s a wall of tribal-looking flames in shades of black and gray that start somewhere below his waist and lick all the way up to his shoulder, over his pec, and down his right arm. It’s beautiful, really well designed, and sexy as hell. On his left side is another tattoo, this one a bunch of words in a fancy black script that I’m too far away to read. But I want to. Suddenly I’m dying to know what words are so important that a guy like Z would brand himself with them.

Something tickles the side of my chin and I have an abrupt, mortifying fear that it’s my own saliva. That I am literally standing here drooling at the work of art that is Z Michaels. I dash my hand over my chin just in case. Turns out I haven’t lost complete control of my salivary glands—it’s just a lock of hair that escaped from my bun.

The realization snaps my brain back into action. A few seconds too late, but I’m a big believer in better late than never. Or at least I am now.

“You know, we have a rule here at the Lost Canyon coffee bar,” I tell him with a little flick of my fingers. “No shirts, no shoes, no service. You should probably go take care of that somewhere else.”

The dark eyes he turns on me are filled with disbelief and maybe, just maybe, a hint of respect. I’ve spent days watching how the female population around here responds to this guy, and I’m pretty sure that I’m the first one to call him on his shit since he hit puberty. Possibly even before.

Just look at the girl he came in with. He was all over her when they first walked into the lodge, just like he’s been every time I’ve caught a glimpse of him the last few days. Not that I was looking for him or anything. But still. Then, within five minutes of being here, he’s hanging out with another girl—the trashy-looking one who threw herself in his path like a pilot on a kamikaze mission.

Though, to be honest, it’s hard to blame him for the second girl. Whoever she was, the look she’d given him had told Z loud and clear that she didn’t mind if he climbed on right there in the middle of the coffee bar. My only surprise was that he hadn’t taken little Miss Can’t-Open-My-Legs-Fast-Enough up on the offer.

Not that it’s any of my business—at least not until he came up to the counter and started in on me. I don’t care if every other girl in town is okay with whatever tiny piece of Z she can sink her claws into. I don’t play that way, even if I am interested in a guy. Which, in this case, I definitely am not. After what happened with Remi, there’s no way I’d touch this guy with a fifty-foot pole.

“Wait a minute,” he asks when he finally gets his slack jaw working again. “You’re refusing to serve me, even though it’s completely your fault that I’m shirtless?”

“First of all, I offered you a towel. You’re the one who decided to take your shirt off. Second, I’m being generous and not charging you for the spilled drink. And third, I don’t make the rules. I just follow them.” Again, I flick my fingers at him like he’s a particularly annoying gnat. “So move along before someone from management sees you and has you removed from the building.”

He snorts, like even the chance of that is too far-fetched to contemplate. Which it probably is. My aunt and uncle love the fact that he comes here to practice with his friends. At dinner the other night they were talking about how to convince him to sign on with them like his friends had. So far they’ve offered him everything but part ownership in the lodge, and he’s turned it all down.

Must be nice to have so much money from endorsements and sponsorships and family that you can just walk away from a shitload of it for no reason at all.

“Management is going to remove me from the building?” he asks incredulously. “You’re the one who just dumped a drink down my pants.”

I feel the need to clarify. “On your pants, not down them.”

“I didn’t realize there was that big a difference.”

“Yeah, I bet you tell that to all the girls.”

“Only the cute ones,” he says with a smirk that somehow makes him look even sexier, a fact that annoys the crap out of me. “And for the record, the next time you want me naked, all you have to do is ask. No coffee spillage necessary.”

My blood starts to boil. Does his arrogance know no bounds? Who cares if he’s the hottest guy I’ve ever seen if every time he opens his mouth he sounds like a total douche?

“Dude, if I wanted you naked, I wouldn’t get you that way by dumping something cold on your crotch.” Determined to put him in his place, I shoot a glance at the area in question, making sure the look on my face is less than impressed. “It kind of defeats the purpose.”

“It’ll take more than a cold drink to defeat that purpose. But if you don’t believe me—” He lifts a brow in obvious challenge while his hands drop to the waistband of his pants.

He starts to unfasten them, but I know he’s bluffing, that he’s just trying to get a reaction out of me. So I stand there, eyes narrowed and arms crossed over my chest while I wait for him to back down. Because there’s no way he’ll actually strip in the middle of this coffee bar. Not now, not in front of all these people.

Except—

“Hey, stop that!” I all but leap across the counter at him, and this time I’m the one grabbing his waistband. Except I’m tugging his pants back up as I try my best to ignore where my hands are.

The smirk has evolved into a full-blown, cocky grin. “So, what do you say we take this somewhere more private?” he teases. He rests his hands lightly over mine, and even though he’s a conceited ass, I still have to resist the urge to fan myself. Z with the wattage turned up is a force to be reckoned with.

Not that I’m going to let him see that.

“Like a holding cell? Public nudity is against the rules and the law.”

“I was thinking more like your room, but if you have a thing for public exhibitionism, who am I to argue?”

“That’s it. You need to leave.” I pull my hands away and reach for the hand sanitizer sitting on the counter next to the register. God only knows what I could catch from having my fingers anywhere near this guy’s pants.

“You still haven’t gotten me my drink. Plus I need three Power O’s.”

I sigh. “Do I really have to go over the whole no-shirt thing again?” I glance around the room, praying for someone—anyone—to come up to the counter so I can switch my attention off Z and to an actual customer. But either no one’s thirsty or they’re having too good a time watching the show to want to interrupt it.

“You’re not actually serious about that, are you?”

“I’m always serious.”

He looks like he’s got something to say to that, but before he can get the words out of his mouth, he gets rushed by the girl from earlier and two other guys. They look vaguely familiar, and after a minute of staring at them like a moron, I realize it’s because my aunt introduced me to them on my first day here. They’re part of the group of snowboarders and skiers Lost Canyon partially sponsors.

It’s no surprise that it takes me a minute to place them. I’d felt like I’d fallen into an alternate universe that day, one where my whole life had gone topsy-turvy batshit crazy. How could I not when things had changed so fast? When what I wanted—needed—most had ceased to exist in the blink of an eye?

“Dude, what are you doing?” the tall blond guy demands, interrupting my pity party. “Put your clothes back on before you scare the new girl away.”

“Yeah, man,” the dark-haired one chimes in. “Walk around like that long enough and some of the snow cougars are going to start shoving dollar bills in your pants.”

Z flips them off, but when one of them hands him a T-shirt, he takes it and shrugs it on. I feel an instant of regret. Though I hassled him about being shirtless, it’s almost a shame to see all that beautiful skin get covered up again. Almost.

“Hey. I’m Cam.” The girl waves a hand in my face, and I immediately jerk my gaze over to hers. I’m embarrassed to be caught gawking at Z, but she doesn’t seem mad. In fact, she looks amused as she thrusts a hand out to me.

I shake it automatically. “I’m Ophelia.”

“Cool name.”

Not really. “Thanks.”

“This is Ash.” She points to the tall blond guy with the floppy hair. “And this is Lucas. And you’ve already met Z. We all ride together.”

“It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too. It’s hard not to like a girl who doesn’t take Z’s shit.”

“Hey! Whose side are you on?” Z demands.

She ignores him, looks at me curiously. “So, where are you from?”

“New Orleans.”

“No way! I love that city!” Lucas tells me. “How come you don’t have an accent?”

“Who says I don’t?” I lay the southern girl on thick.

“That’s better,” he says with a nod. “I’ve always wanted to go for Mardi Gras, but it’s always in the middle of competition season.”

“How ’bout you?” Z speaks up for the first time since his friends came over. I turn to look at him, then glance quickly away. I don’t like the way he’s staring at me, all intense and predatory, like a jungle cat playing with his food before he devours it. “You’ve probably been doing Mardi Gras for years.”

“Nope. It’s not really my thing.” The lie almost sticks in my throat, because for years no one loved the two weeks before Fat Tuesday more than I. The parades, the crowds, the music, the beads, the booze. What’s not to like? Everything, it turns out.

“What?” Now they’re all looking at me like I’m crazy. “Who lives in freaking New Orleans and doesn’t go out for Mardi Gras?” Z demands.

By this time, memories are swamping me and my muscles are so taut that any sudden movement on my part might snap them right off the bone. I try to keep calm, though. Nothing good will come from dredging up the past. Or from letting them see how much this subject stresses me out. Annoyed with myself, with him, with the whole damn situation, I tilt my head up and give him my best I’m-sorry-annoying-little-gnat-did-you-have-something-to-say-to-me look. “Me. Is that okay with you?”

“No.” He looks bemused. “Not really.”

I have no answer for that, so I don’t say anything, and neither does anyone else. An awkward silence descends. Once again I look desperately around for customers, but there’s still no one. So I just wait it out, pretending I don’t hate awkward silences. Pretending I know why Z and his friends are standing around watching me.

Finally Lucas says, “We’re going to a party tonight. You want to come?”

I’m not sure who’s more surprised by the invite, me or Z. I guess it doesn’t matter, because I’m not going. I have to work. Plus, I have no interest in sitting around in a room of strangers all night, watching while every girl in the vicinity hits on Z like he’s some kind of sex god on parade. I’d rather eat a bug—or twelve.

“Thanks,” I tell him. “But I have to work.”

“You can join us later if you want.” He pulls out his phone. “Give me your number and I’ll text you the address.”

“I, uh—” I look to Z for help, but he’s just grinning at me. Like he knows there’s no way uptight little Ophelia would ever give a snowboarder her digits, let alone meet him at a party somewhere.

Before I can think better of it, I rattle off my new number. Luc enters it into his phone, and seconds later my own phone dings to alert me that I’ve got a text message. I glance at Z and this time the smirk is gone from his face. Instead, he looks pissed, and I can’t figure out why, unless he doesn’t want me at the party.

Which is fine. I’m not planning on going anyway. I ignore the instinctive twinge of hurt that I’ve got absolutely no reason to feel. It’s not like I thought he was hitting on me because he actually liked me or anything. More like I’m female and breathing. He probably doesn’t know any other way to talk to women.

I keep my answer noncommittal. “Thanks. Maybe I’ll see you there.”

“You should come,” Ash tells me. “We’ll take care of you.” Z’s scowl deepens.

I’m saved from answering when—finally—a woman with two little kids approaches the counter. “Do you make hot chocolate?” she asks, staring up at the menu above my head.

I turn to her like the lifeline she is. I’m more than ready for Z and his friends to leave me alone. In fact, all I really want to do is finish this shift and head back to my room. I’ve got research to do. Sure, there’s no hurry, since I have a few months before transfer apps have to be in, but still. The sooner I get started on them, the sooner I’ll be warm again. I might not be able to handle going back to New Orleans again, but there’s nothing keeping me from Arizona. Or New Mexico. Or Hawaii, for that matter. I’m not picky. As long as it’s somewhere warm and is handing out a buttload of financial aid, I’m up for pretty much any school. Especially if it means I never have to make another latte or sweep up another floor again.

Ignoring the little voice inside me that’s calling me a coward for ditching the party, I give the lady my most professional look. After what happened earlier, I can’t afford to make a mistake. Not unless I want to blow the chance to save money that comes with working—and living rent free—at Lost Canyon during the busy season. “We do. Regular, peppermint, and caramel.”

The little boy at her feet starts to bounce in excitement. “I want caramel. With lots of whipped cream.”

I can’t help but grin at him. “I can do lots of whipped cream. And chocolate shavings on top, if you’d like.”

“Ooh, I like. I like!”

I glance up to see Cam waving good-bye to me. Lucas points to his phone and mouths, “Text me,” as the four of them drift back to their table. They’re laughing and joking around, completely comfortable with each other in a way only true friends can be. It makes me ache a little, makes me think of Remi and the way things used to be with him. With us.

I curse myself as I take the rest of the woman’s order, then get started on her drinks. I try not to think about him, about the way things used to be. About the way they were supposed to be. What should have been doesn’t matter, only what is.

Pushing the past out of my mind, or at least to the back of it, where I don’t have to think about it every second, I top the three hot chocolates with extra whipped cream and chocolate shavings, just like I promised. As I slide them onto the counter, I watch Z and his friends gather up their stuff and head for the door without a backward glance.

Which is exactly how it should be, I remind myself fiercely. I’m not here to make friends or go to parties or hang out with hot guys. I’m supposed to be healing, getting my life in some semblance of order, making plans for a whole new future. It’s the smart thing to do. The right thing to do. Something tells me Z and the rest of them don’t know the first thing about the kind of desperation that’s riding me hard. Just one more reason for me to stay the hell away from them.

I reach into my pocket for my phone and delete the text Luc sent me with the party address so I won’t be tempted to go anywhere but back to my room after my shift is done. And still, as I watch as the four of them tumble, laughing, out into the snow, there’s a little part of me that wishes I could go. That wishes I could be like everybody else up here.

But I’m not, and I’m afraid I won’t be, ever again. It’s my own fault, and still it bothers me. Not missing the party, because it’s not like I’d have anyone to talk to there anyway. But the realization that there’s still a part of me that cares, that hopes, that wants to be normal. I thought I’d left that girl behind in New Orleans, and finding out that I didn’t …

Yeah, finding out that I didn’t sucks all the way around.