Chapter 4

Susan and I were sitting together on the couch in my place in front of an applewood fire. She had come straight from work without changing, so she was in a dress and heels. The dress was black and simple and set off with some pearls. Her black hair was shiny and smelled like rain. I had my arm around her, which I was able to get away with, because Pearl the Wonder Dog was asleep on her back, in the armchair next to the fireplace, with her feet sticking up in the air.

“I always felt that Rita Fiore had designs on you,” Susan said.

“Me too,” I said. “I’ve always liked that about her.”

“I suspect, however, that you are not the only one.”

“Boy,” I said. “You spoil everything.”

“You think I’m wrong? Me, a shrink? And a female shrink at that?”

“No,” I said, “I think you’re right. That’s what spoils it.”

“How many times she been married?”

“Twice, she told me.”

“Any kids?”

“Not that I know of.”

The fire, being expertly built, settled in on itself as the logs burned. Pearl twitched a little in her sleep and made a snuffing sound.

“What do you suppose she’s dreaming about?” Susan said.

“Everybody always says chasing rabbits,” I said. “But how do they know. She might be dreaming about sex.”

“The baby?”

“Maybe,” I said.

“I hope not,” Susan said. “Are you going to try and get this Ellis person out of jail?”

“I’m going to try and find out the truth,” I said.

Susan bumped her head on my chest a couple of times, which seemed to mean approval.

“That’s almost always the best thing to know,” she said.

“We both have to believe that,” I said. “Don’t we.”

“It’s more than wishful thinking,” Susan said. “There’s a lot of ostensive evidence to support the opinion. Happiness is not the art of being well deceived.”

“So much for Alexander Pope,” I said.

“So much,” Susan said. “You have any champagne?”

“Sure,” I said.

“Well, let’s drink some.”

I got up quietly so Pearl wouldn’t wake up and went and got a bottle of Krug and an ice bucket and two glasses. But to get the champagne and the ice for the bucket I had to open the refrigerator door. And Pearl can hear a refrigerator door open anywhere in the northern hemisphere. By the time I got the ice in the bucket, she was beside me, looking in at the open door. I gave her a small piece of the roast chicken we hadn’t finished and closed the door and went back to the couch. Susan had her feet stretched out on the coffee table, and when I put the ice bucket down, Pearl jumped up beside her where I had been and went into an unyielding snuggle. I poured us two glasses, put the champagne in the bucket to chill, gave one glass to Susan, and sat down beside Pearl, who was now where she wanted to be, between me and Susan. But she wasn’t big enough. I could still reach past her and put my arm around Susan. Which I did. Pearl looked at me. I did not stick my tongue out at her. It is important to win gracefully.

“Have you ever thought of having a child?” Susan said.

“Excuse me?”

“A child. Haven’t you ever wanted one?”

“Well, Paul’s sort of like my kid,” I said. “Not to mention the princess dog.”

“I’d like to adopt a baby,” Susan said.

I drank my champagne and reached over and got the bottle and poured some more. I drank a little of that.

“You and me?”

“Yes. How long have we been together?”

“We met just after school had opened, about this time of year as a matter of fact, in 1974,” I said. “Of course there was a gap back there in 1984/85...”

“And there won’t be another one,” Susan said. “But I would like a baby.”

“A baby,” I said.

“Yes.”

“And would we move in together and take turns looking after it?”

“No. We could live as we do. I think we need to. The baby would live with me. You would be its father.”

“What kind of baby would we get?” I said.

“I don’t know. I thought we could talk about it.”

“Oh.”

“It’s not that hard,” Susan said. “There are only two choices.”

“Yeah.”

I finished my champagne and poured some more. Susan’s glass was empty so I poured her some as well, which emptied the bottle. I got up and got another bottle and jammed it into the ice bucket to chill.

“So what do you think?” Susan said.

“I don’t know. It’s a little sudden,” I said.

“Yes, I know. I didn’t want to broach the subject until I was sure myself.”

“A little one,” I said, “like a month old?”

“Yes, as young as possible. I’d like as much of the full experience as I can have.”

“How much do they weigh when they’re that age?” I said.

“Oh, twelve, fifteen pounds perhaps.”

“About the size of a small turkey,” I said.

“About,” Susan said.

I nodded. We were quiet. Susan sipped her champagne, staring into the fire. Pearl’s head was in her lap. I patted Susan’s shoulder a little.

“I can’t make this decision for you,” she said finally. “But I don’t want to do this alone.”

“Be difficult alone,” I said.

“More than that, it isn’t fair to the child. A child benefits from having a father.”

“If he or she can,” I said. “Probably better having one good parent than none.”

“I don’t think I’ll want to do this without you,” she said.

“You’ll never have to do anything without me,” I said.

“I know,” she said.

And she leaned her head back against my arm and the three of us sat there and looked at the fire.

Загрузка...