Not all the glowing descriptions of amatory writers, not the inspired breath of passion itself, can truly, and in sufficient degree estimate the force of those desires, and the intoxicating delirium of that enjoyment in which the softer sex plays so important a part, and in the gratification of which it relishes a more than equal degree of pleasure.
Were I to cover these pages with descriptions of the most seductive or lascivious scenes, I should fail to realize its full effect.
Language stops short of the reality. No sweeter words, however passionate, however glowing, could transport the bosom, and enthral the frame, like the one magic soul dissolving sensation, experienced by lovers in the celebration of these mystic rites; but if my readers will follow me, while I tell them of some of my amatory experiences, their own feelings may perhaps enable them to sympathise with mine, and thus by analogy, enjoy again some of the most sensual and moving incidents in their own careers.
To say that I was born of respectable parents would, in the full acceptation of the words, be false. My mother was of that disgraced and neglected race, a discarded mistress; my father, a nobleman of the first rank, while still a young man, full of the fiery vices of youth, had caught her eye, his handsome form and noble bearing won her simple love.
The old story followed. He seduced her, kept her awhile to be his toy, and at length, grown tired of her society, threw her off as a plaything of which he was weary.
She died, but he lived on to break the heart of many other innocent creatures.
Whatever may have been his errors, among his redeeming points must be reckoned his care of his illegitimate child.
After my mother's death I was sent to a boarding school, and at the age of fourteen had grown a tall, well-made and genteel looking youth.
It is needless to say, that it was here, in the society of other lads, many of whom were my seniors, that I was first made acquainted with all that is necessary for men to know in a theoretical point of view; of practice with the opposite sex, I knew nothing, but my ardent imagination pictured ecstasies, which fell but little short of the reality, and which was further assisted in its expanded ideas by the scenes we boys enacted among ourselves.
All that we could do we did, and we gave each other as much amusement, as we knew how to administer.
It was no uncommon thing for us to wander into other boys' beds, and each taking in his hand the warm, half stiffened little member of the other, to produce by pleasing friction, that overflow which, feeble substitute as it was, caused us so much enjoyment.
Often too, would one of the bigger boys wantonly insert his glowing affair within the lips of some fair-haired youngster, and there lie and permit himself to be titillated in the most agreeable manner possible.
These pastimes were so common that we scarcely ever passed a night without the repetition of some of them.
I was not fully initiated into all the mysterious practices of the elder boys till my sixteenth birthday, when they admitted me as a member of the upper-class, as all above that age styled themselves. Their custom was that each lad on attaining the age of sixteen had to give the upper-class a banquet, to inaugurate his admission amongst their privileged circle.
My particular chum, Bob Ferguson, had for some time whispered to me when he played with my prick, that there was a great surprise in store for me on my birthday.
Well, at last the momentous night arrived, and being the best provided boy in the school, (as to pocket-money), thanks to the liberality of my father, we had a really splendid banquet, which they all declared quite eclipsed any previous affair of the sort.
On those occasions our master, usually a strict disciplinarian, generally gave us permission to enjoy ourselves, and make as much noise, or have what fun we liked in the big boys' room. Little could he have ever dreamed of the excesses that were actually enacted at these birthday feasts.
After stuffing ourselves with cold game-pie, tarts, and champagne, the real business of my installation commenced by all stripping off their clothes.
Even now my soul thrills as I recall to mind that room full of handsome naked youths, several of them as handsome as Adonis himself, some of the eldest having quite a beautiful growth of silky hair ornamenting their pricks, and my readers may be sure that inflamed as we were with feasting and wine, the sight of each other's charms made everyone rampant and ready for action.
A couple of them now began to handle my tool, gently frigging and pulling back the foreskin as they passed their hands up and down the stiffened shaft; next they proceeded to anoint it with some pomade, and one of the biggest boys presenting his bottom as he stooped forward on a chair, they made me shove into him, till I was fairly in. The delicious warmth of the tight sheath which held me was so exciting, that without further instructions I fucked him as naturally as possible, clinging tightly to him with my arms, and thoroughly enjoying it.
Presently the captain of the class, a fine, handsome youth of eighteen, attacked me in the rear, but being well lubricated, although the pricking pain attending his first insertion was rather sharp, he was soon in full possession, and my double position of fucker and fuckee soon drove me almost mad with delight. I seemed to spend my juice again and again every time; he delighted me with his warm overflow in my bottom. At last I fairly fainted from excess of emotion and when I came to myself found I was lying on one of the beds with Bob Ferguson's cock in my mouth, whilst the captain was deliciously sucking my reinvigorated tool.
What an orgy of lust we enacted that night! It seemed to me heavenly at the time, and even now as I write these lines my old cock stands at the remembrance of it.
Soon after this I left school, preparatory to commencing the career of life, which had been marked out for me; but after a while, finding the occupation of dispensing medicine too irksome, I obtained the permission of my noble parent to study for the medical profession.
Accordingly I went to London, and after several years studious application at the hospitals, I received my diploma from the Examiners at Surgeon's Hall, or in modern parlance, from the Royal College of Surgeons.
A short time after that I settled in a small practice, at the village near which my paternal patron had his principal estate.
It is needless to say that our relationship was kept as secret as the envious gossips of the place could reasonably desire; all they knew was that Lord L-had extended his patronage to me, and that was enough to excite the jealousy of the tuft-hunters of the neighborhood.
Notwithstanding these ill-natured people however, my lord's patronage was quite sufficient to bring me plenty of practice, and within a time I became the fashionable doctor of the district.
This was not entirely owing to the reasons, cogent as they were, which I have above detailed; to a very natural desire to succeed, and to attention to my patients, combined, I flatter myself, with no mean professional ability, I added the graces of a manly, robust and genteel person.
To this latter circumstance, I think, I owe in a great measure, my renown amongst the fairer portion of my patients. My success with these, in love as well as physic, was really marvelous, and I have had as many as three or four people coming to my house in one day for medicine, not altogether of a nauseous description.
My father at this time was living at Broad Heath, his residence in the locality; there he kept a mistress, and being himself a bachelor, he spent the most of his time in her society. In my capacity as medical adviser to the family, an office which carried a key to fit all the doors, I had frequently seen and spoken to this lady; she was a woman of perhaps nearly thirty years of age, tall, slender, yet not thin, carrying in all her movements that particular grace which is only possessed by females of this stamp, far from dark, yet sufficiently inclined towards the brunette to prevent her being called fair, with large and full brown eyes, in which floated constantly the light of youthful desire, unsullied by contact with the ruining hand of public prostitution, and fresh from her native atmosphere; her manners were easy and graceful, and her conversation charming.
With this lady my fancy soon found a resting place, and full of notions of revenging Lord L-'s desertion of my mother, I allowed myself to cherish ideas of putting in practice a signal retribution.
Adelaide, that was the name of this full-blown rose, exhibited in all her intercourse with me so much condescension and regard that I had but little difficulty in persuading myself, her conquest would prove an easy victory.
I endeavoured to insinuate myself into her confidence, and hitting upon a few of her weak points, I soon found myself in a position to open the breach.
Gradually allowing my feelings to become visible, and watching the effects upon the lady, she appeared to me to be flattered by partiality and she smiled on my suit. Opportunity only was now wanted to complete the adventure, and it was not long before it occurred.
One day I was making my usual afternoon's round amongst my patients, when on passing the gates I perceived the chariot of Lord L- emerge with his lordship seated alone with it. Waiting until it had turned an angle of the road, and was well out of sight, I went up to the house, and asked for his lordship-of course he was not at home-and as I was turning, as if to depart, I suddenly asked for the lady, making an excuse about some flowers I had promised her.
Being admitted, I found her seated alone, having just parted from my father; we entered into conversation, and I studied to improve the opportune chance by every means in my power.
Not to weary the reader by detailing every passing compliment or meaning look, suffice it to say a quarter of an hour found us side by side upon a sofa, with my arm tenderly pressed round the waist of the lovely woman. From this position it was easy to snatch an occasional kiss, and finding no great resistance to this liberty, I proceeded cautiously to others still more daring.
My hand wandered over the palpitating bosom of my fair friend, and I gradually turned myself towards her, until our faces met, and my chest pressed her softer charms beneath it.
Our eyes met; there was no necessity for words, the soft voluptuous languor in her humid optics was far more expressive than words of the amorous storm within that tumultuous bosom.
Fierce lust now took full possession of me, and no consideration, however sacred, would have prevented me from gratifying my burning passion upon the person of the lovely being before me.
I sought and found the hem of her dress, and without experiencing much opposition, succeeded in passing my hand up to her knees; it did not stop there, but with redoubled ardour it aspired to take possession of things above. A thigh of large and beautifully moulded proportions ravished me with its softness, yet further, a mossy growth of fine down hair rewarded the boldness of my searching hand.
Wound up to a fearful pitch of excitement, I worked my finger into as charming a little recess as ever tempted man.
Delays are dangerous, more especially in love, so say the eager, and so thought I, as stealthily unbuttoning my nether garments, I slyly introduced my firm and excited weapon to the lovely spot. A voluptuous shudder passed through her frame the first touch. I press forward, a murmur of resentment breaks gently from the lips of my companion; I feel the commencement of the soft insertion, and bursting with impatience, I bury myself in the body of the dear girl.
Once fairly in, how I did revel in charms of such a luxurious nature.
Fiercely did I move in and out of the tight, lusciously clasping case, which clung so amorously with its soft juicy folds to the shaft of my delighted weapon of love.
At each thrust she sighed more deeply, and as the maddening moments passed, and the intense enjoyment lashed our passions into fury, she hugged my form closely to her, whilst low murmurs of wanton pleasure escaped from the dewy lips which had just previously essayed to express her resentment at my outrageous conduct.
Nature could no longer restrain her tribute to the efforts of love, which now produced their usual effect, but in a more exaggerated form. I felt the approach of those moments, during which we die a thousand deaths, as the fires of fierce lightning dance through every nerve. It came; I fell forward. Description is vain to paint my feelings. A quivering agony of pleasure seized us both-a delirious desire to press our souls and bodies closer in communication, a mutual rush of that hot balm, which finally relieves excited nature, closed out transports and left us breathless, hot, and moist in each other's arms.
We remained for some moments closely entwined in each other's embrace, and exchanging those little gentle tokens of gratified passion that usually mark the period of listlessness, succeeding the fierce energy of previous action.
At length we separated, but only to adjust our somewhat ruffled habiliments. She then made me sit down by her side, and it was not long, before I found my champion growing restive beneath the touches of the soft warm hand, which she had inserted into his nest. Not contented however that he should remain thus concealed, she with a slight jerk brought my stately toy into daylight, the proceeded to examine it in every direction.
This amusement I found highly gratifying to my own senses, and soon induced such a state of erection as to give fair promise of a refreshing spurt to the lovely operator.
A new idea seemed to strike her, and sliding on to her knees between my legs, she wantonly caressed my member, all hard and excited as it was, and after lengthened hisses, slowly let it slide into her mouth, and then so tickled it with her tongue, and pressed it between her moist lips, that I was fain to cry "hold!" and abruptly withdrew my instrument for fear of a discharge. But if I deprived myself of one opportunity, I quickly found another opening, not less delightful than the less usual entrance I had just quitted.
We gave ourselves entirely up to the rage of our voluptuous sensations; I wriggled and pushed, until I lay gasping on her breast in the soft agonies of a bountiful emission.
Again and again I cooled my raging lust, in the arms of this charming woman, who was ever ready to respond with all the ardour of her sensuous nature to the continued resurrections of Cupid's battering ram, which she laughingly assured me was a perfect phoenix of its kind.
At last exhausted nature refused longer to sustain my desires, and after much loving dalliance and promises of a speedy re-union, the highmettled pego had to confess himself vanquished, and slunk away crestfallen from the field of love.