The Black Opal

The Treacherous Sea

Elsie and I saw the ship come in, and I thought nothing would ever fill me with such joy. He was home.

We went down to the quay. We always had to wait a while before we could see Toby because, on the ship’s arrival, he was very busy with all the formalities connected with it: but as soon as possible he would be with us.

At last, the moment came and there he was, looking just as he always had, his eyes searching for me, as mine were for him.

Then there was the clinging embrace the assurance that each knew the other was there; then the laughter and the suppressed emotion which was too precious to be shown.

Arm in arm, we would walk off the ship. Elsie always watched us with an amused glint in her eyes, waiting patiently for her share of his attention. She never showed the slightest resentment in taking second place.

I believed she loved him very much in a certain way. Their relationship had always been something of a mystery to me -bantering, but there was no doubt of the affection between them.

We went back to the house where, according to Elsie, the fatted calf had already been killed and Mabe would be hopping mad if everyone was not in the right place to do justice to it.

It was a wonderful Christmas because Toby was there.

I never ceased to marvel at those Australian Christmases-so different from the ones in the past at Commonwood House. The heat here could be excessive at this time of the year, yet, in spite of that, hot roast goose was served with Christmas pudding alight with brandy flames all eaten in brilliant sunshine.

Toby said to Elsie: “You still do it as they do at home … even though you have never been there.”

“Christmas wouldn’t be Christmas without all the trappings,” she admitted.

Christmas and Boxing Day were quiet in comparison with the great occasion fixed for the following day.

I enjoyed it thoroughly. The only guests were Joe Lester and his nephew, William; and for me they were like members of the family. Toby entertained us with tales of life at sea; he seemed to have a great number of such stories and when he told them in his inimitable way, he was very entertaining.

He had told us that his stay would be brief. On New Year’s Day he would be taking a load of copra from one island to another and that would occupy him for a month. Then he would be back to Sydney for a day or so before going off on a cruise to some of the islands.

He smiled at me and said: “Now that you are a young lady of leisure, it did occur to me that you might deign to accompany me on this particular cruise.”

I stared at him for a moment. I was so excited, I leaped to my feet.

He did the same, and we hugged each other.

“I thought you might be pleased, and I intended to announce it over the Christmas pudding, but I couldn’t wait.”

“How could you be so cruel as to withhold it so long?”

“He can be a sadistic wretch on occasions!” said Elsie.

“Come, Joe.

Fill up the glasses. We are going to drink to this cruise to the islands. “

That was a wonderful Christmas Day the best I had ever known and that was because Toby was there and soon I should be sailing on the high seas with him.

house was in turmoil the next day. The morning was given over to preparations. The drawing-room, denuded of much of its furniture, would give us the space we needed for the guests to dance. Elsie was very proud of what she called her ‘orchestra’, which consisted of a piano and two violins set up between the potted plants at one end of the room. The glass doors opened on to the lawn where, I imagined, because of the warmth, most guests would be dancing. The party was certain to be a success, for everyone was determined to enjoy it.

As I had predicted, though we began by dancing in the sitting-room, we were soon out on the lawn.

I had a long talk with James that evening. I was very sorry for him.

He had worked very hard on the family property, and I knew how bitterly disappointed he was that his venture on the opal fields had had to be postponed. My own happiness made me feel particularly sorry for him.

I broached the subject, for I knew it filled his mind, and he wanted to talk about it.

“I’m determined to go sometime,” he said.

“I know most people think nothing will come of it. I know a lot of people are disappointed. But I know I’m not going to be, Carmel. Do you think I’m a fool?”

“Of course not. I think that, as you feel as you do, you must certainly give it a try.”

“I have a theory that, if you are determined to succeed in life, you will.”

“I think that’s a very good one.”

“I knew you would agree with me. Gertie, of course, thinks I’m a fool.

So do the rest of the family, but I know. “

“Well, then, James, you have to try it and prove they are wrong.”

“It’s good talking to you, Carmel. How would you like to go to the opal fields?”

The? I’ve never thought of it. “

“It’s the greatest fun.”

“Oh, I can imagine how exciting it could be.”

“Suppose we went together?”

“What?”

“Don’t sound so surprised. Why not? Suppose we got married?”

I was aghast.

He went on quickly: “Well, we are not children any more. And here we are together. We get on very well. I’ve always been fond of you. Oh, don’t remind me of Suez.”

“I wasn’t going to.”

“Do you know, I have never forgiven myself for that.”

“Please don’t go over all that again. We were children then.”

“It was a dreadful thing to do. You should have heard the lecture I got from the Captain. I have never forgotten it.”

I laughed.

“It doesn’t mean you have to offer me marriage as compensation. I think you are rushing things, James. Just because I understand how you feel about those opals and we happen to be here, where there aren’t many people for you to choose from. We get on well together and most people marry sometime. Well, perhaps all that is not a good enough reason for forming a life partnership.”

“But I am very fond of you, Carmel, and it is true we get on very well together.”

“And you think it would be very convenient. You’ve had all this upset over the property and you are not really thinking clearly about all this. Let’s leave it for a while.”

He brightened a little.

“You always understand, Carmel,” he said.

“Perhaps you’re right. All that did hit me pretty hard. I had it all planned. In a few weeks’ time I should have been on my way. Now I shall not be there for months and months.”

“It will all pass, James.”

“So. We stay good friends?”

“Of course,” I said.

We sat on in the dim light, listening to the sound of the piano and violins coming from the house.

It was a wonderful party and when it was over Elsie was glowing with triumph. Then Toby left and I could think of little else but the coming trip, though now and then I was reminded of that conversation with James.

It had been unexpected and I believed he must have spoken on the spur of the moment. I go to the opal fields with him! Marry him! Poor James. He had had such a bitter disappointment when his journey was postponed and I had been sympathetic-more so than his sister.

Hardly a foundation on which to build a marriage! When he had recovered from his disappointment and was working in the opal fields, he would be grateful to me for not being as impulsive as he was.

In any case, we said no more of the matter and I guessed he was beginning to realize that he had been a little rash.

With what joy, in due course, I boarded the Lady of the Seas.

Toby said: “She should be called the Old Lady of the Seas. Do you know, she is thirty-five years old? Most would have been thinking of retiring. But there is life in the old lady yet. She is the finest ship I ever sailed in. I love her dearly. I have my sentimental moments, as you know.”

I determined to make the most of the trip and enjoy every moment.

Elsie came to see us off and stood on the dock waving to us as we sailed out or rather to me. Toby was always on the bridge during arrivals and departures and never visible to any but the officers who were involved with him in the ship’s business.

And then, there I was in the familiar cabin, and Toby was showing me the map and explaining what course we should take-and I was completely happy.

The days slipped past quickly. Every morning I awoke to the joyous realization of where I was. I would lie in my berth and contemplate the pleasures of the day to come.

I particularly remember that evening in fact, I know I shall throughout my life. It was perfect. The heat of the day was over and the air was soft and balmy. I sat on deck with Toby and I looked up at the Southern Cross in utter contentment.

Toby said suddenly: “The time will come when I shall leave the sea.”

“That will be wonderful because you won’t be going away any more.”

“What shall we do? Have a little house together? Will you look after me in my old age?”

“Of course I shall look after you.”

“I dare say you will spoil me. I shall want to be spoiled. So please do that, Carmel.”

“I am not sure. Everything I do will be for your own good.”

“Oh dear, I am always afraid when people act for one’s own good. It usually means something unpleasant. I want six grandchildren, by the way.”

“That’s rather a lot.”

“I can be very greedy. You see, we’re not young any more. Even you are no longer a little girl. One looks to the future. I suppose one day you will marry.”

I immediately thought of James’s suggestion.

I said: “Well, oddly enough, it was recently suggested to me.”

He was alert at once.

“You mean someone asked you? Who?”

“James Forman.”

He sat back and smiled.

“Well,” he said, “I’m not altogether surprised. Elsie was saying she thought there was something brewing there.”

“Really? I was taken completely by surprise.”

That is because you are unaware of your seductive charms. “

“I think it just occurred to him on the spur of the moment. It seemed to fit in with his plans.”

“Well, he is determined to find opals. He’s quite obsessive about it.”

“I think he wanted someone to go off with him.”

“I can understand that. Half the men in Australia are dreaming of making a fortune from something dug out of the ground. It’s a quick way of making a fortune … if it works, and it does sometimes. And how do you feel about James?”

“I find it difficult to take the idea of marriage seriously.”

“I see. Poor James is going to be a disappointed lover. This party of Elsie’s set me thinking. At home they would be considering your ” coming out”. We should be doing something like that.”

“But there isn’t anywhere to come out to here,” I said.

“There can’t be balls and that sort of thing … except Elsie’s parties.”

“Well, we shall have to see. You ought to meet people. I want you to have the best, Carmel.”

“I know. You have always done so much for me, you and Elsie.”

“I like to think that I wasn’t such a bad father.”

“And I have told you often that you are the best anyone could ever have.”

“First of all, I want you to be happy.”

“I’d like always to be as happy as I am now.”

We were silent for a while. Then he said: “We’ll do some thing. You and I must always be together.”

“That is just what I want,” I told him.

Then he started to plan in the way I knew so well. When ever it was possible, I must sail with him. Now I had left school there would be opportunities. When he returned, we would live together. Sydney was a beautiful place. Did I not think so? Elsie would like to have us close, so that she could keep an eye on us. We could get a place of our own.

He was frowning. Then he said suddenly: “What do you think about going home? You were dragged away rather suddenly.”

My mind went back in time. I was seeing Commonwood House again.

Adeline, looking through the window at the station fly, looking for Miss Carson; Estella, with that air of “I am not afraid’, which betrayed so clearly that she was. It was all hazy, part of a vague, unreal period. Everything would be very different now.

He did not wait for me to answer, but went on: “No, perhaps it would not be a good idea to go back now. We could get a place in Sydney.

Right on the harbour, where we could watch the ships come in. That would be best. “

“It sounds wonderful.”

“As for home-well, that was a long time ago, wasn’t it?”

“It would be strange to go back to Commonwood.”

“Oh, not Commonwood! It would be quite different there.” He was frowning.

“No, no. It will be that place on the harbour. Or, if we did go home because home always has a certain pull, you know I fancy a little place in Devon. On the coast … the home of the great Drake.

Somewhere near the Hoe. Or perhaps Cornwall. Well, the choice will be ours. From Land’s End to John o’Groats. “

“It will be wonderful to plan.”

“Carmel, I’m sorry. It could have been different. In the beginning, I mean. A nice home … with parents.”

“I have my parent.”

“I was thinking of your mother. She would have liked to have you with her. Well, it happened the way it did. She thought it was the best for you.”

“That was what Miss Carson said.”

“Miss … ? Oh, you mean …”

“She said that, soon after she came to the house. I wonder what happened to her? She was a lovely person.”

“How can we know?” he said.

“Anyway, it was all a long time ago.”

He was silent for a few seconds, frowning and staring ahead.

Then he said: “I saw your mother not very long ago. She wanted to hear all about you.”

“You saw her in England?”

“Yes. It would be good if you could see each other. Perhaps you will one day. I don’t see why not.”

“I remember her so well in Rosie Perrin’s caravan.”

“Yes. She told me about the meeting. She was most taken with you.”

“It must be strange to meet one’s own daughter for the first time when she is quite old.”

“Strange things happen in the world. We’ve got the whole world before us now, Carmel.”

I nodded dreamily.

No, I shall never forget the perfection of that night. I have often since felt that it is perhaps dangerous to be as happy as I was then, and it may be such perfect happiness is doomed not to last.

It was two days later. We lay off the island of Mahoo. I had awakened early and looked through my porthole window, and there it was-the perfect desert island, lush and green in that pellucid sea, palm trees swaying in the breeze, native huts scattered around the shore, and little boats rather like canoes coming out to the ship.

Toby had said that we should be too big to get close in to the island and it would mean anchoring just about half a mile offshore, and going in on the launches. First the cargo which was being taken to the island would be unloaded and taken ashore, and then we ourselves could follow.

While I was on deck watching the unloading of the cargo, he joined me for a moment.

“You and I will go ashore together. There’ll be something of a ceremony. I shall rub noses with the Chief and I shall introduce you to him. You will be amused.”

“How interesting!” I cried.

“I often think how lucky I am to have a sea captain for a father. How many people can travel the world and in such a way?”

He kissed the tip of my nose.

“You haven’t seen anything yet,” he said.

“Now, I must leave you. I just thought I’d have a quick word.”

Yes, I was indeed perfectly happy.

Toby and I were taken ashore with the Chief Officer and two of his men. As the launch scraped on the sand, we disembarked in about a foot of water and were immediately surrounded by naked children, all shrieking at the top of their voices.

They were welcoming us to their island.

Two formidable-looking men stepped forward and threw flowers, made into necklaces, about our necks. Toby saluted in acknowledgement, which made the children rock about with mirth.

Then the two men who had presented us with the flowers walked on either side of us. They were naked from the waist up, and the garments they wore were made of animal skins and feathers. The feathers had been dyed red and blue. The men had frizzy hair which stood out round their heads and in it they wore bone ornaments. They carried spears: and, but for the flowers and the giggling children, I should have felt like a captive.

Toby glanced at me and gave me a reassuring wink.

“The usual welcome,” he said.

“I’ve done it all before. They know me for a friend. The next step in the proceedings is presentation to the Great Chief.”

We walked up the gentle incline, the children surrounding us, laughing and shouting to one another: and there, in the clearing, the ceremonial greeting took place.

I saw the Chief at once. He was seated on what might be called a throne. It was indeed ornate. It looked most imposing, decorated with flowers and the skins of animals. Above it had been fixed a very fierce-looking mask. The mouth was a snarl and the expression menacing. It was bigger than the Chief’s face and he was a very big man. He wore about his shoulders a cloak of feathers blues, greens and red in colour. On either side of him stood two very large men with spears.

Toby stepped up to the Chief and bowed. The Chief inclined his head but did not rise.

Toby said something and the man who had taken him up to the Chief spoke too. The Chief listened. Then he stood up. The feather cloak fell from his shoulders, exposing bare flesh like shining ebony. Toby went close to the Chief, who seized him by the shoulders and brought their faces close together. This was what Toby called rubbing noses.

Some words were spoken. Then Toby turned to me and held out his hand.

I found myself looking into the large black eyes of the Chief. He had to stoop low to be on a level with me as his hands pressed on my shoulders and, for a moment, I felt as though I were being drawn away from all that was familiar into a different world as I stared into those pools of darkness. It was an uncanny sensation. Then I felt his nose touch mine. For a few seconds it moved gently. Then I was released.

I said to myself: So they really do touch noses. And then I felt normal again.

We were seated beside the Chief and Toby summoned the other sailors to come forward. They carried boxes which they had brought ashore. These were opened and revealed certain gifts for the Chief. The children crept closer and there were gasps of pleasure and excitement. There were trinkets of all kinds, and all the spectators, including the

Chief, regarded them with wonder. The object which aroused the most excitement and appreciation was a mouth organ. Toby played a tune on it, which sent the watching crowd wild with delight.

The gifts were, of course, a token of our friendship, and there must be a return of such tokens. A ceremonial presentation followed when the Chief placed a necklace of bone about Toby’s neck. Then I realized that I was to have one too, for I was the Captain’s daughter and to honour me was to honour the Captain.

The Chief himself placed it round my neck, and again those dark eyes looked deep into mine as though to read my thoughts. I hoped he could not. I was merely hoping that he would not touch my nose with his. He did, however, and then, holding my shoulders, looked deep into my eyes before releasing me.

Then we sat down and several of the warriors were presented to my father; and others came forward to perform some of their native dances, which were mainly stamping on the ground with their feet in what appeared to be a warlike manner, and uttering what I presumed to be battle cries. I was relieved that we were friends and not enemies.

This went on for what seemed to me a very long time. The heat was intense and the sun was setting by the time we returned to the ship.

That evening we sat on deck, looking over the sea to the island. We could hear the sound of drums in the distance.

“Rather exhausting,” said Toby.

“It was so hot and everything was strange.”

“These islands are very much of a pattern. The ceremonies are a little different, but not much. We naturally have to be a little wary in our dealings with the islanders. There could so easily be misunderstanding. We are as strange to them as they are to us. The mouth organ was an immense success, wasn’t it?”

I laughed at the memory.

“I liked the children best,” said.

“They were so amused by us and didn’t attempt to hide it.”

He smiled at the memory.

“Well, we shall sail at midnight tomorrow.

The tide will be right and we shall have completed our business by then. “

“It has been a wonderful trip. I hate to think of its coming to an end.”

“There’ll be others. By the way, it will be rather an important occasion tomorrow. We shall be honoured by the ceremony of the Kerewee Cup. That’s the native drink. There is something sacred about it and the fact that we are allowed to watch its preparation means that we are accepted as friends. They make a ceremony of proclaiming friendship.”

“I suppose, when you can be set on by an enemy at any time which is what must have happened to them in the past you want to make sure of your friends.”

“That’s right. It’s why the dances are like displays of their warlike prowess. They’ll make this Kerewee Cup, and it will be done with the utmost ceremony under the eyes of the Chief. Then the cup, which is in fact a large bowl, will be handed round and we have to partake.”

“You mean actually drink it?”

“Afraid so. Don’t look alarmed. You need take only a sip, but don’t let them see you don’t drink it. I am sure that would be a deadly insult and bring down all sons of curses … the vengeance of their gods or something like that.”

“What sort of vengeance?”

“I don’t know because no one to my knowledge has ever dared to provoke it. Don’t look alarmed. It’s easy enough. Only don’t let them see that you are not eager to drink.”

“What strange sights you must have seen in all your travels!”

“Well, I suppose I have been around a bit.”

I smiled and thought how lucky I was to have a share in his life.

The heat was intense. I had sat on one side of the Chief, Toby on the other, for about an hour. We had witnessed ritual dances and had come to that part of the ceremony where one of the men crouched down and made fire by rubbing two stones together. The pot was placed over the fire and many ingredients were put into it. While it was stirred, the company uttered mournful incantations; and at last the mixture was ready.

It was poured into a smaller bowl which would be handed round. The pot was then placed in front of the Chief; then there was a sudden shout from the assembly. The children all began to whimper and in terror ran to their mothers and hid their faces. I caught Toby’s eyes and he nodded almost imperceptibly. I thought he was assuring me that the terror was all part of the playacting and that they were not really in the least afraid.

The newcomer-tall as the Chief and wearing a mask which was huge and horrific-came forward and stood before the Chief. He gesticulated wildly and contorted his body into odd shapes; his teeth were bared. He turned from the Chief to glare at Toby, who looked suitably impressed, even cowering away from the wrath of the man.

It occurred to me that he must be a witch doctor, a breed of which I had heard a good deal. Toby had once told me that they appeared to have power over life and death and, if they told a man he was to die, that man did die.

“I don’t understand it,” Toby had said.

“But I know it has happened.

Some say it is auto-suggestion.

“There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” There may be something in that. “

I remembered the conversation for a long time. There was certainly something unearthly about this man.

Prancing about in a strange manner, he was telling the

Chief something. A silence had fallen over the crowd and I suddenly felt they were no longer playacting. He went on twisting his body into strange contortions, pointing to the sky and making moaning noises.

And then, to my horror, he turned to Toby. He moved close to him, still moaning and swaying and pointing to the sky.

Then he turned and stood before the bowl of Kerewee. Suddenly, he picked it up and drank. Then he lifted the bowl, shaking his head back and forth, and I saw the liquid glistening on his chin. Then he laid the bowl reverently at the Chief’s feet and sat down beside Toby.

The drinking ceremony had begun. Two men carried the bowl to the Chief, who raised his hands to the sky in what appeared to be a blessing. Then he bent and drank, after which the bowl was passed to Toby, who managed it very well. There was a deep sigh throughout the crowd as the bowl was handed back to the Chief who took another drink before passing it to me.

I took the bowl and, as I did so, I almost dropped it. A little of the liquid slipped on to my dress. There was an awed silence. Hastily, I lifted the bowl and put it to my lips. I held it so that no one would be able to see how much I drank. My lips were wet with the liquid and I made a show of swallowing. The bowl was taken from me and the ceremony proceeded.

It was not until the bowl was empty and set down at the feet of the Chief and the dancing began that I felt at ease.

Then suddenly the witch doctor if that was what he was rose and began to gyrate in front of the Chief. He kept gazing up to the sky and he danced round Toby. He was shaking his head and then he began to shout, moving his body in strange contortions. Toby had risen; he shook his head and lifted his shoulders. I could not understand what he was trying to convey.

The Chief seemed to be remonstrating with him, and the people began murmuring as they shook their heads to and fro.

I wished I understood what was going on; I had a sudden notion that they were going to prevent our return to the ship and I sensed that some of the officers were uneasy too.

The sun was beginning to set and I knew that Toby was eager to get back to the ship to prepare for the midnight sailing.

He rose and, taking my arm, the officers with us, started to walk down to the shore. The Chief walked beside us, shaking his head all the time, as though in some protest. Toby kept a firm grip on my arm.

Finally we reached the boat. Toby helped me in and sprang in beside me. The others followed. There were not many of them who had accompanied us to the ceremony probably half a dozen officers at most.

These people could have stopped us with the greatest of ease, but they just stood, watching us leave, sadly shaking their heads.

“What was that all about?” I asked Toby as we moved away.

“They were trying to prevent our leaving,” he answered.

“They could easily have done that. They didn’t seem to be hostile.”

“Far from it. They wanted us to know that they were our friends. It was something to do with the wise old man.”

“The witch doctor, you mean?”

“He’s something like that. He thought we shouldn’t go. He’s seen something … some message in the sky. We should stay until tomorrow night. They don’t understand anything about the importance of time.

They see omens and such things everywhere. “

“It was kind of them to be so concerned.”

“They’re our friends. Didn’t I give them a mouth organ?

It may be they were just being especially hospitable, just telling us how sorry they were our stay was not longer so why didn’t we extend it a bit? Or perhaps it was simply something they got into their heads. It may have been something to do with your nearly dropping the stirrup cup. “

“It gave me such a fright.”

“I’m not surprised. I don’t suppose anyone ever came near to dropping it before. My dear girl, you ought to have realized you were holding a sacred emblem.”

“I did. That was why I was so nervous.”

“Well, that little jaunt is over. No more sacred drinking for a while.”

“It was all very interesting, but I was scared at one point that they were not going to allow us to get away.”

“And now, here we are, safe with the Lady of the Seas. Doesn’t she look a beauty?”

“You love the old ship, don’t you?”

“I do. But I love my daughter more.”

And at midnight we sailed.

During the early hours of the morning a strong wind blew up. I was awakened once or twice by the rocking of the ship and lay for some time listening to the creaking of her timbers. At times it seemed as though the Lady was protesting quite strongly.

During the late morning it abated a little, but there was a strong swell and it was too windy to go on deck. As night fell it worsened and I did not see Toby. I was experienced enough to know now that when the weather was bad it was necessary for him to be in charge in person and there could be no delegating to his deputies.

I retired fairly early. Sleep was not easy and I dozed fitfully. The movement of the ship was increasing. Tropical storms could be fierce and it was certain that we were close to one now. I wondered whether

Toby would attempt to take the ship into some harbour, if it were possible to find one.

I was fast asleep when I was awakened by the clanging of bells. I knew what this meant. The ship was in difficulties. We had been instructed as to what to do in such cases. One put on warm clothing, took one’s life belt and made one’s way to the nearest deck.

I fumbled with my clothes. I was thinking: If I can get to Toby . I must get to Toby.

But Toby would be at his post and there was no place for me there. But he would want me to be with him. I must find my way there.

Trembling, I buttoned up my coat and tied a scarf over my head. It was difficult to stand up and keep my balance.

I pulled open the door of my cabin and stumbled out into the alleyway.

The noise was deafening. It sounded as though something was breaking up everywhere. I staggered along to the companionway. The ship seemed different. It was hard to recognize familiar places. Furniture was lying broken in the wrong place. I could hear people shouting.

I must find my way to Toby.

I mounted the companionway. I felt a rush of air. I was now in a violent wind. I was close to the deck. There had been a door but it seemed not to be there now. Then I found I was staggering along the deck. I was unprepared for the force of the wind. It caught me and dragged me forward and then threw me back. I fell and with great difficulty scrambled to my feet. It was impossible to stand upright. I gripped a rail and stood, clinging to it. Everything seemed different.

Where was I? Nothing looked as it had before.

I was bewildered and very frightened. There was one thought which would not be dismissed. I must find Toby. We must be together.

I tried to be calm. This must be the way, although it looked different. I must find my way to the bridge. He would certainly be there. He had to look after the ship and I must be near him.

I managed to move along the deck. Now there were people everywhere.

They were letting down the lifeboats, those which such a short time before had taken us to the island.

The ship gave a sudden tilt. I was falling . sliding . I heard shouting. I tried to get up but could not move.

There was deafening noise everywhere. I heard a scream.

Someone was lifting me up.

“Toby,” I said.

“Toby.”

I was in a boat. It was uncomfortable. All I was aware of was that my leg was hurting. I was sitting on one side of the Chief, Toby was on the other. He was winking at me and saying: “Don’t let them see you are not drinking.”

Rock, rock, rock went the boat. Someone was putting something to my lips. I drank. It was fiery.

“Commonwood wouldn’t be the same now,” I heard Toby saying.

Then the rocking and oblivion.

I was on a ship. I could feel the familiar movement. Then it was quiet. I remembered. There had been a storm, but it was all right now.

I was in bed and someone was bending over me, but I was too tired to open my eyes.

The time came when I did open them. I knew for certain that I was on a ship, but it was not the Lady of the Seas. My leg hurt. I tried to move it but I couldn’t. I could feel that it was bandaged.

A woman came by. She was in the uniform of a nurse. I called to her.

She said: “Hello. So you’ve surfaced, have you?”

“Where am I?” I asked.

“On the Island Queen.”

“But…”

“We picked you up. You’re all right now. Leg came to grief, but it’s getting better.”

“What … happened?”

“You get some rest and we’ll have a long talk about it later.”

But. “

She was gone.

How had I come to be here? I was too tired to think. I had been on the Lady of the Seas. What had she said? The Island Queenf No . it was too much . and I was too tired.

I floated into oblivion. I was in the garden at Commonwood House. Mrs.

Marline was shouting at Adeline and Miss Carson was comforting her.

Then I was in the woods. Zingara was sitting on the steps of the caravan.

“I am your mother,” she was saying.

I was struggling to get out, to come back to what I vaguely knew was real. I was on a ship which was not the Lady of the Seas. Then where was Toby’s ship? And where was Toby?

“Hello,” said the nurse.

“Feeling better?”

I nodded.

“That’s the spirit. Leg’s not badly hurt. It’ll right itself in time.

You’ve had a nasty shock. “

I said: “What happened? ” “The weather was very bad. It can be like that in these seas. We picked you up. We’re taking you to Sydney. You’ve got people there, haven’t you?”

I said: “The ship … the Lady of the Seas… ?”

“It seems she was on her last legs. Been around a bit. Could be an inquiry.”

I could not grasp what she was talking about.

“Don’t you fret,” she went on.

“You’re safe now. You were one of the lucky ones.”

“The lucky ones.” I was floundering for words which would not come, perhaps because I was afraid to say them.

“What … what happened?”

“She was lost… and quite of number of poor souls with her.”

The Captain? “

“Well, dear, the Captain is always the last to leave the ship, isn’t he?”

It was the ship’s doctor who told me.

He had discovered that Toby was my father and he was very gentle.

He took my hands and said: “You see, it was a violent storm. They get them now and then in these waters. The ship couldn’t stand up to it.

Quite a number of people went down with her. I’m going to give you something to make you sleep. That’s what you need. “

I had lost him. All my happiness, all my dreams of the future . gone. An ageing vessel and a merciless sea had taken that away from me.

I had lost the one I loved above all others. I was aware of nothing but complete desolation.