Max Ferguson's basement was accessible by concrete steps in back of his house, and I could tell by dead leaves drifted against them that no one had been here for a while. But I could be no more exact than that, for fall had peaked in the mountains. Even as Wesley tried the door, leaves spiraled down without a sound as if the stars were shedding ashes.
"I'm going to have to break the glass," he said, jiggling the knob some more as I held a flashlight. Reaching inside his jacket, he withdrew the Sig Sauer nine-millimeter pistol from its shoulder holster and sharply tapped the butt against a large pane in the center of the door. The noise of glass shattering startled me even though I was prepared for it, and I half expected police to rapidly materialize from the dark. But no footfall or human voice was carried on the wind, and I imagined the existentialist terror Emily Steiner must have felt before she died. No matter where that might have been, no one had heard her smallest cry, no one had come to save her.
Tiny glass teeth left in the mullion sparkled as Wesley carefully put his arm through the opening and found the inside knob.
"Damn," he said, pushing against the door.
"The latch bolt must be rusted." Working his arm in farther to get a better grip, he was straining against the stubborn lock when suddenly it gave. The door flew open with such force that Wesley spilled into the opening, knocking the flashlight out of my hand. It bounced, rolled, and was extinguished by concrete as I was hit by a wall of cold, foul air. In complete darkness, I heard broken glass scrape as Wesley moved.
"Are you all right?" I blindly inched forward, hands held out in front of me.
"Benton?"
"Jesus." He sounded shaky as he got to his feet.
"Are you okay?"
"Damn, I can't believe this." His voice moved farther away from me. Glass crunched as he groped along the wall, and what sounded like an empty paint bucket clanged dully as he knocked it with his foot. I squinted when a naked bulb went on overhead, my eyes adjusting to a vision of Benton Wesley dirty and dripping blood.
"Let me see." I gently took hold of his left wrist as he scanned our surroundings, rather dazed.
"Benton, we need to get you to a hospital," I said as I examined multiple lacerations on his palm.
"You've got glass embedded in several of these cuts, and you're going to need stitches."
"You're a doctor." The handkerchief he wrapped around his hand instantly turned red.
"You need a hospital," I repeated as I noticed blood spreading darkly through the torn fabric of his left trouser leg.
"I hate hospitals." Behind his stoicism, pain smoldered in his eyes like fever.
"Let's look around and get out of this hole. I promise not to bleed to death in the meantime."
I wondered where the hell Marino was. It did not appear that SBI Agent Ferguson had entered his basement in years. Nor did I see any reason why he should have unless he had a penchant for dust, cobwebs, rusting garden tools, and rotting carpet. Water stained the concrete floor and cinderblock walls, and body parts of crickets told me that legions had lived and died down here. As we wandered corner to corner, we saw nothing to make us suspicious that Emily Steiner had ever been a visitor.
"I've seen enough," said Wesley, whose bright red trail on the dusty floor had come full circle.
"Benton, we've got to do something about your bleeding."
"What do you suggest?"
"Look that way for a moment." I directed him to turn his back to me. He did not question why as he complied, and I quickly stepped out of my shoes and hiked up my skirt. In seconds, I had my panty hose off.
"Okay. Let me have your arm," I told him next.
I tucked it snugly between my elbow and side as any physician in similar circumstances might. But as I wrapped the panty hose around his injured hand, I could feel his eyes on me. I became intensely aware of his breath touching my hair as his arm touched my breast, and a heat so palpable I feared he felt it, too, spread up my neck. Amazed and completely flustered, I quickly finished my improvised dressing of his wounds and backed away.
"That should hold you until we can get to a place where I can do something more serious." I avoided his eyes.
"Thank you, Kay."
"I suppose I should ask where we're going next," I went on in a bland tone that belied my agitation.
"Unless you're planning on our sleeping in the helicopter."
"I put Pete in charge of accommodations."
"You do live dangerously."
"Usually not this dangerously." He flipped off the light and made no attempt to relock the basement door. The moon was a gold coin cut in half, the sky around it midnight blue, and through branches of far-off trees peeked the lights of Ferguson's neighbors.
I wondered if any of them knew he was dead. On the street, we found Marino in the front seat of a Black Mountain Police cruiser, smoking a cigarette, a map spread open in his lap. The interior light was on, the young officer behind the wheel no more relaxed than he had seemed hours earlier when he had picked us up at the football field.
"What the hell happened to you?" Marino said to Wesley.
"You decide to punch out a window?"
"More or less," Wesley replied.
Marino's eyes wandered from Wesley's pantyhose bandage to my bare legs.
"Well, well, now ain't that something," he muttered.
"I wish they'd taught that when I was taking CPR."
"Where are our bags?" I ignored him.
"They're in the trunk, ma'am," said the officer.
"Officer T. C. Baird here's going to be a Good Samaritan and drop us by the Travel-Eze, where yours truly's already taken care of reservations," Marino went on in the same irritating tone.
"Three deluxe rooms at thirty-nine ninety-nine a pop. I got us a discount because we're cops."
"I'm not a cop." I looked hard at him. Marino flicked his cigarette butt out the window.
"Take it easy. Doc. On a good day, you could pass for one. "
"On a good day, so can you," I answered him.
"I think I've just been insulted."
"No, I'm the one who's just been insulted. You know better than to misrepresent me for discounts or any other reason," I said, for I was an appointed government official bound by very clear rules. Marino knew damn well that I could not afford the slightest compromise of scrupulosity, for I had enemies. I had many of them. Wesley opened the cruiser's back door.
"After you," he quietly said to me. Of Officer Baird he asked, "Do we know anything further about Mote?"
"He's in intensive care, sir."
"What about his condition?"
"It doesn't sound too good, sir. Not at this time." Wesley climbed in next to me, delicately resting his bandaged hand on his thigh. He said, "Pete, we've got a lot of people to talk to around here."
"Yeah, well, while you two was playing doctor in the basement, I was already working on that." Marino held up a notepad and flipped through pages scribbled with illegible notes.
"Are we ready to go?" Baird asked.
"More than ready," Wesley answered, and he was losing patience with Marino, too. The interior light went off and the car moved forward. For a while, Marino, Wesley, and I talked as if the young officer wasn't there as we passed over unfamiliar dark streets, cool mountain air blowing through barely opened windows. We sketched out our strategy for tomorrow morning. I would assist Dr. Jenrette with the autopsy of Max Ferguson while Marino talked to Emily Steiner's mother. Wesley would fly back to Quantico with the tissue from Ferguson's freezer, and the results of these activities would determine what we did next. It was almost two a. m. when we spotted the Travel- Eze Motel ahead of us on U. S. 70, its sign neon yellow against the rolling dark horizon.
I couldn't have been happier had our quarters been a Four Seasons, until we were informed at the registration desk that the restaurant had closed, room service had ended, and there was no bar. In fact, the clerk advised in his North Carolina accent, at this hour we would be better off looking forward to breakfast instead of looking back at the dinner we had missed.
"You got to be kidding," Marino said, thunder gathering in his face.
"If I don't get something to eat my gut's going to turn inside out."
"I'm mighty sorry, sir." The clerk was but a boy with rosy cheeks and hair almost as yellow as the motel's sign.
"But the good news is there's vending machines on each floor." He pointed.
"And a Mr. Zip no more'n a mile from here."
"Our ride just left." Marino glared at him.
"What? I'm supposed to walk a mile at this hour to some joint called Mr. Zip?" The clerk's smile froze, fear shining in his eyes like tiny candles as he looked to Wesley and me for reassurance. But we were too worn out to be much help. When Wesley rested his bloody panty-hose wrapped hand on the counter, the lad's expression turned to horror.
"Sir! Do you need a doctor?" His voice went up an octave and cracked.
"Just my room key will be fine," Wesley replied. The clerk turned around and nervously lifted three keys from their consecutive hooks, dropping two of them to the carpet. He stooped to pick them up and dropped one of them again. At last, he presented them to us, the room numbers stamped on the attached plastic medallions big enough to read at twenty paces.
"You ever heard of security in this joint?" Marino said as if he had hated the boy since birth.
"You're supposed to write the room number on a piece of paper which you privately slip to the guest so every drone can't see where he keeps the wife and Rolex. In case you ain't keeping up with the news, you had a murder real close to here just a couple weeks back." In speechless bewilderment the clerk watched Marino next hold up his key as if it were a piece of incriminating evidence.
"No minibar key? Meaning forget having a drink in the room at this hour, too?" Marino raised his voice some more.
"Never mind. I don't want no more bad news." As we followed a sidewalk to the middle of the small motel, TV screens flickered blue and shadows moved behind filmy curtains over plate-glass windows. Alternating red and green doors reminded me of the plastic hotels and homes of Monopoly as we climbed stairs to the second floor and found our rooms. Mine was neatly made and cozy, the television bolted to the wall, water glasses and ice bucket wrapped in sanitary plastic. Marino repaired to his quarters without bidding us good-night, shutting his door just a little too hard.
"What the hell's eating him?" Wesley asked as he followed me into my room.
I did not want to talk about Marino, and pulling a chair close to one of the double beds, I said, "Before I do anything we need to clean you up."
"Not without painkiller." Wesley went out to fill the ice bucket and removed a fifth of Dewar's from his tote bag. He fixed drinks while I spread a towel on the bed and arranged it with forceps, packets of Betadine, and 5-0 nylon sutures.
"This is going to hurt, isn't it." He looked at me as he took a big swallow of Scotch.
I put on my glasses and replied, "It's going to hurt like hell. Follow me."
I headed into the bathroom. For the next several minutes, we stood side by side at the sink while I washed his wounds with warm soapy water. I was as gentle as possible and he did not complain, but I could feel him flinch in the small muscles of his hand. When I glanced at his face in the mirror, he was perspiring and pale. He had five gaping lacerations in his palm.
"You're just lucky you missed your radial artery," I said.
"I can't tell you how lucky I feel." Looking at his knee, I added, "Sit here." I lowered the toilet lid.
"Do you want me to take my pants off?"
"Either that or we cut them." He sat down.
"They're ruined anyway." With a scalpel, I sliced through the fine wool fabric of his left trouser leg while he sat very still, his leg fully extended. The cut on his knee was deep, and I shaved around it and washed it thoroughly, placing towels on the floor to blot bloody water dripping everywhere. As I led Wesley back into the bedroom, he limped over to the bottle of Scotch and refilled his glass.
"And by the way," I told him, "I appreciate the thought, but I don't drink before surgery."
"I guess I should be grateful," he answered.
"Yes, you should be." He seated himself on the bed, and I took the chair, moving it close. I tore open foil packets of Betadine and began to swipe his wounds.
"Jesus," he said under his breath.
"What is that, battery acid?"
"It's a topical antibacterial iodine."
"You keep that in your medical bag?"
"Yes."
"I didn't realize first aid was an option for most of your patients."
"Sadly, it isn't. But I never know when I might need it." I reached for the forceps.
"Or when someone else at a scene might-like you." I withdrew a sliver of glass and placed it on the towel.
"I know this may come as a great shock to you. Special Agent Wesley, but I started out my career with living patients."
"And when did they start dying on you?"
"Immediately." He tensed as I extracted a very small sliver.
"Hold still," I said.
"So what's Marino's problem? He's been a total ass lately."
I placed two more slivers of glass on the towel and stanched the bleeding with gauze.
"You'd better take another swallow of your drink."
"Why?"
"I've gotten all of the glass."
"So you're finished and we're celebrating." He sounded the most relieved I had ever heard him.
"Not quite." I leaned close to his hand, satisfied that I had not missed anything. Then I opened a suture packet.
"Without Novocain?" he protested.
"As few stitches as you need to close these cuts, numbing you would hurt as much as the needle," I calmly explained, gripping the needle with the forceps.
"I'd still prefer Novocain."
"Well, I don't have any. It might be better if you don't look. Would you like me to turn on the TV?" Wesley stoically stared away from me as he answered between clenched teeth! "Just get it over with." He did not utter a protest while I worked, but as I touched his hand and leg I could feel him tremble. He took a deep breath and began to relax when I dressed his wounds with Neosporin and gauze.
"You're a good patient." I patted his shoulder as I got up.
"Not according to my wife."
I could not remember the last time he had referred to Connie by name. On the rare occasion he mentioned her at all, it was a fleeting allusion to a force he seemed conscious of, like gravity.
"Let's sit outside and finish our drinks," he said. The balcony beyond my room door was a public one that stretched the entire length of the second floor. At this hour the few guests who might have been awake were too far away to hear our conversation. Wesley arranged two plastic chairs close together. We had no table between us, so he set our drinks and bottle of Scotch on the floor.
"Do you want more ice?" he asked.
"This is fine." He had turned off lamps inside the room, and beyond us the barely discernible shapes of trees began to move in concert the longer I stared at them. Headlights were small and sporadic along the distant highway.
"On a scale of one to ten, how awful would you rank this day?" he spoke quietly in the dark.
I hesitated, for I had known many awful days in my career.
"I suppose I'd give it a seven."
"Assuming ten's the worst."
"I have yet to have a ten."
"What would that be?" I felt him look at me.
"I'm not sure," I said, superstitious that naming the worst might somehow manifest it. He fell silent and I wondered if he was thinking about the man who had been my lover and his best friend. When Mark had been killed in London several years before, I had believed there could be no pain worse than that. Now I feared I was wrong. Wesley said, "You never answered my question, Kay."
"I told you I wasn't sure."
"Not that question. I'm talking about Marino now. I asked you what his problem is."
"I think he's very unhappy," I answered.
"He's always been unhappy."
"I said very." He waited.
"Marino doesn't like change," I added.
"His promotion?"
"That and what's going on with me."
"Which is?" Wesley poured more Scotch into our glasses, his arm brushing against me.
"My position with your unit is a significant change." He did not agree or disagree but waited for me to say more.
"I think he somehow perceives that I've shifted my alliances." I realized I was getting only more vague.
"And that is unsettling. Unsettling for Marino, I mean. " Still, Wesley offered no opinion, ice cubes softly rattling as he sipped his drink. We both knew very well what part of Marino's problem was, but it was nothing that Wesley and I had done. Rather, it was something Marino sensed.
"It's my opinion that Marino's very frustrated with his personal life," Wesley said.
"He's lonely."
"I believe both of those things are true," I said.
"You know, he was with Doris for thirty-some years and then suddenly finds himself single again. He's clueless, has no idea how to go about it."
"Nor has he ever really dealt with her leaving. It's stored up. Waiting to be ignited by something unrelated. "
"I've worried about that. I've worried about what that something unrelated might be."
"He still misses her. I believe he still loves her," I said, and the hour and the alcohol made me feel sad for Marino. I rarely could stay angry with him long. Wesley shifted his position in his chair.
"I guess that would be a ten. At least for me."
"To have Connie leave you?" I looked over at him.
"To lose someone you're in love with. To lose a child you're at war with. To not have closure." He stared straight ahead, his sharp profile softly backlit by the moon.
"Maybe I'm kidding myself, but I think I could take almost anything as long as there's resolution, an ending, so I can be free of the past."
"We are never free of that."
"I agree that we aren't entirely." He continued staring ahead when he next said, "Marino has feelings for you that he can't handle, Kay. I think he always has."
"They're best left unacknowledged."
"That sounds somewhat cold."
"I don't mean it coldly," I said.
"I would never want him to feel rejected."
"What makes you assume he doesn't already feel that way?"
"I'm not assuming he doesn't." I sighed.
"In fact, I'm fairly certain he's feeling pretty frustrated these days."
"Actually, jealous is the word that comes to mind."
"Of you."
"Has he ever tried to ask you out?" Wesley went on as if he had not heard what I just said.
"He took me to the Policeman's Ball."
"Umm. That's pretty serious."
"Benton, let's not joke about him."
"I wasn't joking," he said gently.
"I care very much about his feelings and I know you do." He paused.
"In fact, I understand his feelings very well."
"I understand them, too." Wesley set down his drink.
"I guess I should go in and try to get at least a couple hours' sleep," I decided without moving. He reached over and placed his good hand on my wrist, his fingers cool from holding his glass.
"Whit will fly me out of here when the sun is up."
I wanted to take his hand in mine. I wanted to touch his face.
"I'm sorry to leave you."
"All I need is a car," I said as my heart beat harder.
"I wonder where you rent one around here. The airport, maybe?"
"I guess that's why you're an FBI agent. You can figure out things like that." His fingers worked their way down to my hand and he began to stroke it with his thumb. I had always known our path one day would lead to this. When he had asked me to serve as his consultant at Quantico, I had been aware of the danger. I could have said no.
"Are you in much pain?" I asked him.
"I will be in the morning, because I'm going to have a hangover."
"It is the morning."
I leaned back and shut my eyes as he touched my hair. I felt his face move closer as he traced the contours of my throat with his fingers, then his lips. He touched me as if he had always wanted to, while darkness swept in from the far reaches of my brain and light danced across my blood. Our kisses were stolen like fire. I knew I had found the unforgivable sin I had never been able to name, but did not care. We left our clothes where they landed and went to bed. We were tender with his wounds but not deterred by them, and made love until dawn began to around the horizon's edge. Afterward I sat watching the sun spill over the mountains, coloring the leaves. I imagined his helicopter lifting and turning like a dancer in air.