The Doctors’ Baby

CHAPTER FOUR

EMILY made the journey to Blairglen the following morning, specifically to see Anna at the end of her tests. She knew Jonas was with her but, if she could, she needed to be there, too.

Luckily, it was Tuesday. Em had an arrangement with a doctor who worked south of Bay Beach. They were both overworked, but in emergencies they gave anaesthetics for each other, or covered if one was ill. They’d formalised this so that every Tuesday Chris was officially ‘on call’ for Em, and every Thursday she did the same for him.

It didn’t give them time off. What it meant was that they could do house calls in outlying areas where the cellphones were out of range, and while they did it they knew the nursing staff had someone they could contact in an emergency.

And this Tuesday it meant that Em could rise early, check her hospital patients, visit a patient on the northernmost tip of her district and then travel the extra distance to end up at Blairglen Hospital.

Blairglen Breast Screen in particular.

Anna’s mammogram had been scheduled for ten-thirty so Anna was well through the X-ray department by the time she got there. As referring doctor, Em asked to see the X-rays before she saw Anna, and her heart sank at what was put up on the screen.

This didn’t look like a cyst.

On the other hand, she told herself firmly, deliberately thinking positively, it looked a firmly contained mass. There was only the one small lump, and there was no other suspicious area.

‘Where’s Anna now?’ she asked the nurse in charge, and was pointed through into the procedures room.

‘They’ve done an ultrasound, and now they’re doing a biopsy,’ the nurse told her. ‘But she’s seen the X-rays and her brother’s explained what it means. He’s nice, isn’t he? He’s still with her.’

Yes, he was nice, but Em was focused on Anna. ‘Can I go in?’

‘Sure,’ the nurse told her.

So Em went in. Anna was lying on the procedure trolley, while a biopsy was taken. The medical team were taking tiny core samples of the tumour.

They weren’t wasting any time, Anna thought. Which was good. By the end of today they’d have solid answers. That was something, at least, even if the answers weren’t the ones they’d hoped for.

From the door, Em could hardly see Anna, but she saw Jonas at once. He looked up as she entered, and she saw straight away the strain and shock he was feeling.

It was impossible to be doctor and brother at the same time, she thought, and her heart went out to him. What had the nurse said? He’d explained the X-rays to Anna? Surely that wasn’t his job.

But her focus now still had to be on Anna. She crossed to the table, a nurse made room for her and she lifted Anna’s hand as the doctors worked on.

‘Hi,’ she told her. ‘Not great news, huh?’

Anna shook her head, and a tear slipped down her cheek. She looked terrible, clothed in a pallid, green hospital gown, her face bloodless, and only her bright hair giving any vestige of colour. The doctor was taking a biopsy of her breast at that moment. Even though she was anaesthetised and there’d be no pain, Anna’s lips were clenched, and Em saw she was very close to the edge.

Without a word Em grabbed a tissue, held it to Anna’s eyes, and then placed it in her hand. ‘The specimen’s been taken,’ she told her as the doctor moved away. ‘Anna, it’s finished. That’s the last of the tests.’

‘It’s cancer.’

‘Yes, it’s cancer. Anna, this is bad news, but not terrible. You hang on to that.’ She flicked a glance at the radiologist in charge, a woman in her fifties. ‘This probably won’t even mean a mastectomy, will it, Margaret?’

‘Not on the basis of what we’ve found.’ Margaret White was Blairglen’s senior radiologist. Normally, to do a mastectomy or not was a surgeon’s decision, but Patrick May, who did Blairglen’s breast surgery, worked hand in glove with Margaret and he didn’t mind if Margaret stepped in with early reassurance. ‘You’ll be using Patrick?’

‘That’s who I’ll be suggesting,’ Em said. She took Anna’s hand and smiled down at her. ‘Anna, Patrick May is one of the best surgeons I’ve met.’ She hesitated and then smiled again. ‘Apart from your brother, of course.’

That brought a weak twinkle in response, as Anna looked up at Jonas’s strained face. ‘Of…of course.’

‘Patrick’s good,’ Em reiterated, for the benefit of Jonas, who was looking doubtful. ‘If you-and Jonas-are happy to use him and you have the operation here, we can transfer you back to Bay Beach Hospital for aftercare almost immediately. That means the kids can visit you.

‘But the chemotherapy…radiotherapy…how will I cope?’

‘Radiotherapy is just like having a chest X-ray once a day. And if the tumor’s as tiny and self-contained as it looks, then chemotherapy would be optional extra insurance. That’s all. Do it and get on with your life.’ Anna closed her eyes. ‘You’re not lying to me?’ she asked weakly. ‘You’re not all lying?’

Em’s hand tightened on hers. ‘Absolutely not.’

‘How the hell did you manage it?’

Anna was dressing, and Jonas had hauled Em out into the corridor, out of Anna’s hearing. ‘How did you get away from Bay Beach to be here for Anna?’ His voice was incredulous, as if he was having trouble taking everything in. ‘You could have floored me when you walked through the door.’

‘Miracles sometimes happen,’ Em said lightly, and glanced at her watch. ‘I work on producing them when they’re needed. But…’ She hesitated. ‘This miracle is due to end. I can’t be here for long.’

‘For long enough. You were the person she most wanted to see.’

‘I figured that,’ Em said seriously, accepting it as the truth. ‘Half the fear of this type of investigation is that it has to be done by strangers. So, when I can, I try to get here.’

‘You’d do this for anybody?’

She stiffened. ‘You mean, I’d do it not just for your sister?’

He gave a weary smile at that, and an apologetic shrug. ‘I guess you must. Anna is special to me, but to you she’s just a patient.’

‘No one’s just a patient,’ Em said roundly. ‘And if I ever feel like that, I’ll walk away from medicine and never come back.’

There was a sudden silence. A nurse walked by, carrying a tray of pathology specimens, but she was ignored. Jonas was watching Em, and he had eyes for nobody else.

‘City GPs don’t do this for their patients,’ Jonas said slowly, and Em shook her head.

‘That’s unfair. How many family doctors do you know?’

‘It’s not unfair. It’s true.’

‘Then your knowledge of family medicine is biased,’ she told him. She smiled then, determined to keep things light. ‘What a good thing you’re going to be one for a couple of months.’

‘A couple of months…’

‘Three,’ she said promptly. ‘That’s how long at least Anna will need you.’

‘If she lets me.’

‘She’ll let you. So you’re facing three months of trying to be a good brother and a good family doctor. It’s going to be quite a learning experience.’ She shook her head and glanced at her watch. ‘Jonas, I really need to go.’

‘I know.’

But she didn’t want to leave.

And Jonas himself didn’t want her to go. She could feel it. There was a moment’s silence while Em looked at the floor and Jonas looked at Em. Wondering.

And then, before she could stop him, he reached out and took her hands in his. Both her hands. He held them tightly, looking down at them with a twisted, self-mocking smile.

They were good hands, he could see. Em’s hands bore the scars of too much use-of being washed a hundred times a day, every day of the week, for years and for years as she moved from patient to patient. These weren’t the hands of the women he normally mixed with, he thought, but they looked wonderful hands to him.

‘Thank you, Emily,’ he said simply, and then he did the only thing he could think of to do-and he did it because he couldn’t bear not to.

Right there and then, in the busy hospital corridor, with people striding by every few seconds, he pulled her into his arms and he kissed her.

And by the time he’d let her go, Em’s life had changed for ever.

‘I do not care for Jonas Lunn!’

Em said it to herself over and over, like a mantra, as she drove back to Bay Beach, and all afternoon and evening she worked with the same mantra ringing in her head. He’s a charismatic bachelor who’s drop-dead gorgeous. He kissed you out of gratitude, and it means absolutely nothing at all. And even if it did mean anything…even if he’s attracted to you like you are to him…he’s here for a short time while his sister is treated and then he’s off. He’s out of here, and you have to carry on with your life!

But it wasn’t quite as simple as that. The mantra had flaws. Because…

Because-‘He’s gorgeous!’ Lori said, as Em dropped by to treat her little burns patient that night. She was watching as Em changed dressings and made Robby’s small limbs do their exercises, but Lori’s mind wasn’t on Robby. It was definitely on Jonas. ‘He’s one of the best-looking men I’ve seen.’

And then she watched with interest as her friend’s colour turned to a slow-burn crimson. Her eyebrows rose. ‘Hey, and you think so, too.’

‘But, then, I’m sex-starved,’ Em retorted, and she managed a grin. She was trying desperately to keep it light. ‘Me and my old Bernard have a thing going, but I’ll admit the relationship’s been rocky lately. Bernard’s snoring’s getting out of hand and, frankly, Jonas Lunn doesn’t look bad in comparison.’

‘In comparison to a moth-eaten mongrel who does nothing but sleep and whose only party trick is to trip people over when they least expect it? Wow, that’s saying something.’ Lori watched as Em’s deft fingers gently massaged Robby’s legs. ‘Robby’s doing really well.’

‘He is.’ Em smiled down at baby Robby, who smiled just as happily up at her. Even when she hurt him he smiled at her, she thought, and her heart twisted again. Damn. Robby and now Jonas were twisting their way into her heart. Bernard was facing some pretty stiff competition these days.

‘Robby’ll have two brothers and a sister as of tomorrow,’ Lori told her, and watched her face change.

‘You mean Anna’s kids are coming here while she has the operation?’

‘Yep. Anna and Jonas were here two hours back, collecting the kids but organising a longer-term stay for them. Apparently the surgeon wants to operate as soon as possible and, now she’s made up her mind, Anna can’t see any reason for putting it off. So it’s tomorrow. In fact, I think she would have liked to get it over with this afternoon.’

‘I don’t blame her.’ Em nodded as she thought it through. ‘So Jonas is dumping the kids on you.’

‘That’s hardly fair,’ Lori said mildly. ‘He’ll be back and forth, visiting Anna, he’s offered to work for you-which I think is a really good idea-and he’s hopeless with kids. He hardly knows them.’ She shrugged. ‘And we’re lucky. For once, the homes aren’t full. Kate and Anna-the twins who’ve been with me while their parents sorted themselves out-left me yesterday, no one’s been sent down from Sydney and Robby is all I have left.’

Then, as Em finished Robby’s dressing, Lori scooped the baby up and hugged him tight. ‘That leaves just me and Robby tonight, doesn’t it, scamp?’

But not quite. Robby pursed his lips and his little mouth puckered. He held himself rigid against Lori, twisted his tiny body and held out his arms to Em. It was absolutely transparent where his affections lay.

Damn.

Lori handed him over, but her pucker of concern remained. ‘He’s still attached to you, Em.’

‘Maybe it’d be best if I didn’t see him any more,’ Em said, but her heart flinched at the thought. She had to harden it. Long-term commitment to a baby wasn’t an option. ‘Now Jonas will be here every day-at least I assume he’ll be here, checking on his niece and nephews-he could do the dressing changes.’

‘Which leaves Robby with no one.’

‘It leaves him with you. He has to reattach some time, and it mustn’t be to me.’

‘I don’t know to who, then,’ Lori said. ‘It’s a disaster if he attaches long-term to me. I’m just an interim home mother. I must get his aunt to agree to long-term foster care.’

‘She still won’t?’

‘No. She has the attitude that the town will think she’s uncaring-that it’s a betrayal of her sister to put Robby into foster-care.’

‘So she’ll leave him in an orphanage instead!’

‘When in doubt, do nothing,’ Lori said, and there was a trace of weariness in her voice which Em caught.

‘Maybe we could have Jonas talk to her,’ she suggested. ‘He can charm blood out of a stone, that one.’

‘He can at that.’ Lori looked at her friend, and her attention focused. ‘Are you sure you’re not interested in him?’

‘I’m not interested in him.’

‘You know…’ Lori looked her up and down, noting how tightly her hands were holding the little boy in her arms, and noting also the signs of strain around her eyes. ‘You know, I don’t believe you.’

‘You’d better.’ Em glowered. ‘If you find Jonas so attractive, why don’t you have an affair with him yourself?’

‘Oh, great.’ Lori grinned placidly. ‘No, thanks. I have my Raymond, and he’s a far sexier being than even your Bernard!’

That brought a chuckle. ‘I don’t know about that,’ Em said innocently, thinking of Lori’s boyfriend, Bay Beach’s local accountant, with a grin. ‘They look about the same around the middle. And with the weight Ray’s carrying, I bet they snore the same.’

She got a glower back-and then a chuckle of agreement. ‘OK, you’re right,’ Lori said fondly. ‘Poor Raymond. But he has taken on board what you said about the dangers to his heart. He’s been on a diet for weeks now.’

‘That’s great,’ Em said, mildly surprised. Lori’s Raymond was verging on truly fat, and she worried about him, but she thought he’d taken on the role of fat and jovial for ever.

‘It’s not much use, though,’ Lori told her, still smiling. ‘It’s just lucky I love him tubby. He’s using the doughnut hole diet.’

‘The doughnut hole diet?’

‘Doughnut holes are the bits you get when you cut the middle out of the doughnut.’ Lori nodded sagely. ‘So, instead of eating donuts, Ray now only eats doughnut holes. He figures all the calories stay in the doughnuts themselves.’ She chuckled. ‘And yet still I love him. If I wasn’t so tied up with my kids I’d even marry him-but he’s content enough with the arrangement as it is.’

‘Lucky Ray.’

‘Lucky me.’ Her friend’s smile died. ‘Seriously, Em, you’ll be sharing a house with Jonas for the next three months. If I were you-’

‘If I were me I’d be very careful,’ Em said solidly. ‘Unlike you, I can’t indulge in a love life. Seriously, Lori, do you know what would happen if I fell in love with Jonas Lunn?’

‘No.’ Her friend sighed resignedly. ‘I don’t. But I have a feeling you’re about to tell me.’

‘Yep.’ Em was on her bandwagon now, and there was no stopping her. ‘It’s one of two things. First, I could fall completely irrevocably in love, my passion would be returned in full by the wonderful Jonas, and I’d drop everything and follow the man of my dreams wherever he went.’

‘Not necessarily. He could stay here.’

‘Oh, come on, Lori. Do you seriously think a man like Jonas could ever be happy practising medicine in Bay Beach?’

‘Maybe not, but-’

‘Or, two,’ Em continued ruthlessly, ‘we could have a mad, passionate affair, then he leaves, I break my heart, and I sit around for the rest of my life like Miss Haversham in that Charles Dickens novel.’

‘What, surrounded by rats and wedding cake?’ Her friend eyed her dubiously. ‘Unlikely! Bernard would stir himself to eat the cake, and your patients would queue even if you were wearing your fifty-year-old wedding dress. Em, you don’t think you could be going overboard here?’

‘No.’ Em hardened her heart.

‘There is a third option,’ Lori suggested.

‘Which is?’

Robby had fallen asleep in Em’s arms. Lori lifted him out, tucked him into his cot and kissed him goodnight. Then she stood back and eyed her friend in concern.

‘You could just have fun,’ she told her. ‘You could just lighten up, have a fling and enjoy yourself. Heaven knows, you deserve it.’

‘I-’

‘The world won’t end if you have an affair,’ Lori said sternly. ‘And you might just have a very good time. Think about it. Now, go home. I’m sorry, love, but my Raymond’s coming to dinner and I need to cook. My time without too many kids in this house is precious, because I intend to have a love life, even if you don’t. Love lives are fun. Think about it.’

And with that she kissed her friend on the cheek and propelled her out the door.

Leaving Em thinking about it.

When she walked into the apartment, Jonas was there and, just like Lori, he was cooking dinner.

The sensation was so unexpected that it brought her up short. She stood in the doorway while the smell of steak filled her nostrils and the aura of his presence filled her senses.

‘Um…why are you here?’ she managed at last, and he threw her a grin over his shoulder.

‘I live here. It’s the doctors’ quarters,’ he told her, quite kindly. ‘The nurses showed me through. I’ve unpacked into one of the spare bedrooms, I’ve introduced myself to your doormat that calls itself a dog and I’m now thoroughly at home. And I’m cooking us both dinner.’ Then, at her look of bewilderment, his grin widened. ‘I had Lori ring me when you left the home so I knew when to put the steak on. I was starving!’

‘So Lori knew?’

‘Of course Lori knew,’ he told her. ‘Otherwise how could I have timed the steak?’

That much was unanswerable. Em thought a few unutterable thoughts about deceiving friends and fought to keep her composure. ‘You could have eaten without me.’

‘Why? You’re not vegetarian, are you?’ he asked, his face falling. And then the smile returned. ‘But, hey, Lori would have told me, and even if you are it’s no matter. I’m starving enough to eat two steaks by myself, and I have a heap of crispy herbed potatoes in the oven.’

‘Crispy potatoes…’ The aroma throughout the kitchen was wonderful. Almost unbelievable. She stalked suspiciously across the room to the oven and pulled the door wide, but it was just as Jonas had said. There they lay, masses of tiny potatoes, baked golden and mouth-watering, and smelling of rosemary and sage and something she couldn’t identify.

‘Didn’t you believe me?’ he asked, wounded, and she struggled to know how to answer him.

‘You can cook,’ she managed finally, and he lifted his brows in mock indignation.

‘Lady, I’m a surgeon. If I can repair a heart valve, I can follow a recipe.’

‘It doesn’t always follow,’ she muttered, thinking of men she’d known in the past.

‘Then welcome to the new order.’ He motioned to the table. There was a salad, already prepared, and a bottle of wine. ‘Sit.’

‘I don’t drink.’

‘Because you’re always on call?’ He’d guessed it. ‘But I’m on call tonight. So sit! And enjoy the novelty.’

So she sat while Jonas piled her plate high with steak and potatoes, and poured her a glass of wine and himself a soda water.

‘See?’ he said virtuously, sitting down himself. ‘I’m in an alcohol-free zone for the night, so you can drink all you want.’

‘I’d better not.’ No way. Two glasses of wine with this man before her-and his smile-and she’d not be responsible for her actions, she thought dazedly. All this and the man could cook?

But he was looking toward her dog, who hadn’t moved since she’d arrived. Well, why would he? He’d been fed today and there was an hour or so before he had to shift to her bedroom.

‘Does Bernard ever move?’ he asked, motioning over to where her big red dog lay sprawled under the kitchen sink. Waiting for something to drop. Only if it didn’t drop right on his lolling tongue, it’d be wasted. Some things weren’t worth burning calories for.

Em shook her head, smiling. ‘Does Bernard move? That’s like asking if a doormat moves.’

‘Oh, I see. You chose him for his scintillating conversation, then.’ Jonas grinned, his wide, lazy smile reaching up and lighting his eyes. ‘Great. I can see I’ll fit right in. A woman who demands a lot from her men…’

She blushed bright pink at that. Good grief! Get the conversation back to medicine, she told herself. That way was safest.

‘I…I thought you’d be spending the night with Anna.’

That put a damper on the conversation. Jonas’s face looked shuttered. ‘Maybe I should be,’ he told her. ‘But I’m not wanted.’

‘Is she OK?’

‘Yes.’ He bit into his steak and concentrated on his food, but Em knew it was just a ruse to get his thoughts into order. ‘She is,’ he said finally. ‘She’s under control. She’s home with her kids, packing and being as normal as possible, while she waits to go into hospital tomorrow.’

‘Are you happy to use Patrick?’ Em asked.

‘He’s an excellent surgeon,’ Jonas told her, still absently concentrating on his steak. ‘When I met him I realised I know him a bit. He’s older than me, but we trained in the same hospital. Yeah, I’m happy for Patrick to operate and, what’s more important, so is Anna.’

‘And he was reassuring?’

‘The margins all look clear. The lump itself is less than a centimetre across. He wants to do a lumpectomy and node clearance, but he’s pretty confident that nothing’s spread.’

‘And how does that make you feel?’ Em asked.

‘Better.’ He lifted a potato, examined it-then laid it down on his plate again. ‘No,’ he told her honestly. ‘It doesn’t. It makes me feel lousy-I feel so damned out of control.’

There was a long silence, broken only by Bernard’s inevitable snoring. They finished eating before either spoke again. Em knew that Jonas needed time to come to terms with today’s events. The last thing he needed was idle chatter.

So she finished eating, then cleared and stacked the dishwasher while he sat and stared at the table. And stared some more. But she found she didn’t mind the silence. She and Grandpa had never needed to make small talk, and somehow, with Jonas, it felt the same.

Like all the little stuff had already been said…

‘Thank you for making dinner,’ she said at last, the kitchen cleared and the evening closing in on them. She was bone weary, and he still needed space. She touched his shoulder lightly as she passed. ‘Bernard and I are going to bed. Is there anything else you need?’

He looked blindly up at her. ‘No.’

‘It’ll be fine,’ she told him. And then she looked across at the phone. ‘Ring Anna.’

‘What?’ He glanced at his watch. ‘It’s after ten o’clock.’

‘You think she’ll be sleeping?’

‘No, but-’

‘Ring her, Jonas,’ she said softly. ‘I haven’t had so much wine that I can’t cope here. If she wants you to go, then you go.’

‘I told you-I’m on call.’

‘If Anna needs you, consider it a call. But ring her.’

He looked at her strangely, his eyes blankly inscrutable. ‘I guess you’re right,’ he said at last.

‘I think I am.’

He caught her hand and held it, for a whole fraction of a second. It was a short enough time, but it was enough. Em froze at his touch, and could only draw back in relief when he let her go. If he knew what he did to her…

But for Jonas, the sexual tension simply didn’t seem to be there. All his thoughts were on his sister. ‘Thank you,’ he told her, and gave her a weary smile. ‘You’re right, of course.’

‘I have to be,’ Em said, and if her voice dragged a little at the thought, who could blame her? ‘I don’t have much choice.’

Because, choice or not, the invincible Dr Mainwaring wasn’t feeling very invincible at all!

She picked up Bernard, hitched him over her shoulder in a fireman’s hold as she’d done every night for ten years, and took her pyjama-bag to bed.