The Ex

43

Deirdre lowered the pickax and listened to her own breathing in the quiet bedroom.

“My God!” a breathless voice said.

When she raised her head, Deirdre saw Darlene’s reflection in the dresser mirror.

“She wanted David,” Deirdre said to the reflection.

“She wanted what you wanted, so you killed her.”

“Exactly. I have the right. David was always mine, and always will be mine.”

“You’re evil, Deirdre. You were always evil.”

“That isn’t true! Evil was done to me.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“You were lucky. You died when you were five. You stayed good. Father never had a chance to-”

“To what?”

“You know. Mother knew too, but then she didn’t know. So I was never good enough, never bright or pretty enough. I was never you. I couldn’t live up to you because you weren’t there to live up to. It wasn’t fair!”

“Scarlet fever wasn’t fair to me.”

“I would have been better off dead too. Almost every night I wished I was dead. Someplace where I couldn’t be touched. At peace like you. You could never have been what they pretended. You would have been just like me if you hadn’t gotten sick and died, not some pure and perfect angel that belonged in heaven. That’s where they always said you were. When you died, I was condemned to hell. I wish it had been you in the bedroom when the door opened, and you who was forced-”

“Forced?” Darlene smiled. “You know that isn’t true.”

“Not after a while, maybe.” Pressure built in Deirdre’s throat and she swallowed. “You never knew what it was, never saw the blood on the sheets. I have scars, inside and outside. I look different from what I am. Sometimes people think a sexy woman is dumb.”

“Not you, Deirdre. Nobody ever took you for stupid after they knew you for a while.”

“But when they did think I was stupid, I made them sorry.”

“It’s time to be honest with me. Honest all the way.”

“I learned to do to men what was done to me. To control them.”

“That must have proved useful.”

“It’s still useful.”

“What about the fire?” Darlene asked. “Remember that night? Mother and Father? It was like our house was screaming, only it was-”

“Shut up! Now!” Deirdre stood very straight and glared.

“You don’t like thinking about it, do you?”

“You don’t know about the fire!”

“Oh, sure I do. And I know about that place you ran away from.”

“I’m not surprised by that,” Deirdre said bitterly. “You’re nosy, a spy. You’ve spied on me for a long time, haven’t you?”

In the mirror, Darlene smiled. “You sound just like a little girl I used to know.”

“I didn’t do what they said I did,” Deirdre told her.

“Sure you did. But you don’t remember.”

“Hah! Like you were there!”

“I’m here, aren’t I?”

“Yes. Still spying, sneaking, working against me. You’ll tell the police what I did here, won’t you?”

“Of course I won’t. We’re sisters. You more than anyone know how certain things must stay within families.”

“Mother and Father! You’ll tell them!”

“They know all about you, anyway. Everybody who’s dead knows all about you. I won’t tell anyone who’s alive.”

“I don’t trust you.”

“You shouldn’t,” Darlene’s reflection said smugly. “You can’t trust me any farther than you can know me.”

Deirdre drew a deep breath, then turned away from the mirror and faced Darlene.

She raised the pickax.

Darlene didn’t move.

Only closed her eyes and smiled.