I went over to the university to call on Carl Tower. I hoped the campus cops weren't under orders to shoot on sight. Whether they were, the secretary with the ripe thighs was not. She was friendly. She had on a pants suit today, black, with a large red valentine heart over the left breast. Red platform heels, red enamel pendant earrings. Bright red lipstick. She obviously remembered me. I was probably haunting her dreams.
She said, "May I help you?"
"Don't pull that sweet talk on me," I said.
"I beg your pardon."
"I know what you're thinking, and I'm sorry, but I'm on duty."
"Of all the outer offices in all the towns in all the world," she said, "you had to walk into mine." There was no change in her expression.
I started to say something about, "If you want anything, just whistle," but at that moment Carl Tower appeared at his office door and saw me. I was obviously not haunting his dreams.
"Spenser," he said, "get the hell in my office."
I took off my wristwatch and gave it to the secretary. "If I don't come out alive," I said, "I want you to have this."
She giggled. I went into Tower's office.
Tower picked up a tabloid-size newspaper from his desk and tossed it across at me. It was the university newspaper. Across the top was the headline ADMINISTRATION AGENT SPIES ON STUDENT, and in a smaller drop head, PRIVATE EYE HIRED BY ADMINISTRATION QUESTIONS ENGLISH PROFESSOR. I didn't bother to read the story, though I noticed they spelled my name wrong in the lead paragraph.
"It's with an s, not a c," I said. "Like the English poet. S-p-e-n-s-e-r."
Tower was biting down so hard on his back teeth that the muscles of his jaw bulged at the hinge.
"We won't ask for a return on the retainer, Spenser," he said. "But if you are on this campus again, ever, we'll arrest you for trespassing and use every influence we have to have your license lifted."
"I hear you got the manuscript back," I said.
"That's right. No thanks to you. Now beat it."
"Who returned it?"
"It just showed up yesterday in a cardboard box, on the library steps."
"Ever wonder why it came back?"
Tower stood up. "You're through, Spenser. As of this minute. You are no longer in the employ of this university. You have no business here. You're trespassing. Either you leave or I call some people to take you out of here."
"How many you going to call?"
Tower's face got quite red. He said, "You sonova bitch," and put his hand on the phone.
I said, "Never mind. If I whipped your entire force it would embarrass both of us."
On the way out I stopped by the secretary's desk. She handed me back my watch.
"I'm glad you made it," she said.
On the inside of the watch strap in red ink she had written "Brenda Loring, 555-3676."
I looked up at her. "I am, too," I said, and strapped the watch back on.
She went back to typing and I went back to leaving the university in disgrace. Administration agent, I thought as I went furtively down the corridor. Zowie!