The Spook Who Spoke Again

4

I assumed Thalia and Soterichus must be doing ‘what men and women do’ which is what my sisters say to keep it a secret from me. I think I know what it is, though I have never seen it happening. Julia and Favonia explained that this is how people make babies, so I wondered if my mother would have another one. Since I had three sisters already, two of them very annoying, I didn’t need more and even though silly people sometimes suggest I must want a little brother, they are wrong.

I decided to go in and put a stop to this.

I strolled up to the tent humming, so it would seem as if I was breaking the strict instructions by accident, while very busy thinking about other things. When I went inside, I saw that what men and women do is to sit on cushions with a low table in front of them, containing little drinks cups for visitors, like the silver ones Father has for dealers at his antiques warehouse when he is trying to make them pay too much for items. There was also a large bag of money and tablets of lists. I had not known that making a baby is a financial transaction, though I suppose it makes sense. Father is always saying that bringing up his children costs him a lot of money.

I might ask my mother how much she paid Soterichus for me. She seemed too busy at the moment to ask. She wasn’t taking much notice of me coming into the tent because she had Jason coiled around her and he was fidgeting.

I was disappointed in Soterichus. He was an unhappy-looking man with a big belly and a red face. Although his beard was stubbly, otherwise he had very little hair, with what remained being crinkled and greyish. He was dressed in a long brown tunic, with deep, brightly coloured braid on the hem. He wore battered old sandals through which big ugly toes were visible, with thick snagged nails, and he had several bangles on his hairy arms. All his skin was the colour of burnt wood and he smelt like the menagerie.

Thalia didn’t seem too bothered by me appearing in the tent. She was still trying to organise Jason more suitably around her. ‘This is my lad. Say hello nicely to Soterichus.’

‘Hello,’ I said, not nicely because I was so displeased to learn I had been fathered by a glum man in horrible sandals. ‘My name is Marcus Didius Alexander Postumus. Postumus is supposed to mean I was born after my father had died.’ That was if my father was my grandfather Favonius.

I was watching Soterichus closely, but he made no reaction to being told he was dead (if it was him). He just gave me a nod, as if a no-account person had been introduced to him, then he seemed to be waiting to return to his transactions with Thalia. She looked put out; she was concentrating on the python. You would think if he was arranging to have another baby Soterichus would want to inspect me, to see how well the first one had turned out. Or perhaps he could instantly tell from my impressive demeanour.

I decided to bide my time before letting them know I knew he was my father.

‘Do you want to fetch your ferret, darling?’ asked Thalia, in a kindly voice. By this she was indicating to Soterichus that she was a good mother. It was the first time she ever said ‘darling’ to me, though Helena does. Falco calls me Scruff although I am not scruffy at all, but a neat person unless I have happened to get dirty; He says his nickname is ironic.

I nodded and started looking around the tent; then came the horrible moment when I began to realise Ferret was not there. Thalia and Soterichus continued their meeting. It involved a tense conversation about the giraffe. They were pretending it was all trading banter, but I could tell they were just saying routine things, not meaning anything real. He claimed he would persuade her to have the crocodile eventually, because he knew she wanted it really. She said he was smooching as usual but he could forget it. Crocs were lethal. She did not have the staff or the facilities. He said yes but the public adored them. She called him a rude word.

I had not heard that word before; it was obviously very bad. I would have to write it down.

While Soterichus was spluttering in surprise, I said loudly, ‘My ferret’s gone!’

‘Cough up, Soterichus,’ Thalia ordered him. ‘The giraffe was piss poorly from the off and you bloody well know it. You pulled a fast one when you passed him off, more fool me for believing you … Postumus, dearie, I shall help you to look. He can’t have gone far. He must have burrowed in somewhere.’

She jumped up, pretending to help me, though I could tell it was only to show she would definitely have no more to do with Soterichus’ offer of the crocodile. She still believed nothing had happened to Ferret.

As Jason slid off her when she leapt to her feet, I felt a terrible premonition creeping over me, like when you have accidentally stood in a very cold pond. I looked at the python. He smirked back at me. He was the kind of guilty criminal who stands there and dares you to accuse him, saying ha, ha, you can’t prove anything, while he’s laughing.

I said, in a quiet voice, ‘I wonder if Jason has eaten my ferret.’

‘No, Postumus darling, of course he hasn’t. Jason had a rat two days ago, he won’t be hungry again yet.’

‘He has eaten Ferret! I know he has.’

‘Don’t get yourself worked up.’

I wanted to scream and create like a very little boy, but I was twelve, or more likely eleven as Helena would say, so I knew better. I wanted to cry big tears, because I had lost my friend Ferret and also I was afraid he must have had a frightening experience when the snake attacked him. I hated to think of him in that predicament. He must have been horribly surprised. I always looked after him as nicely as I could, so he was not used to anything bad happening. I hated to think of him slowly going down inside the python, at first perhaps still alive. I wondered what that must have felt like.

I wished we had never come here. I wanted to go home. Sometimes I imagined that if I could just run home, I might find Ferret sitting up on his normal bed there and it could be as if none of this had happened to us. But I knew that was no good.

I went back to searching, madly throwing things aside while I looked everywhere again.

Thalia went out to Soterichus in the round part of the tent. I heard her say in a low tone, ‘You had better go. I need to see to him. His pet is lost and you can see his poor little heart is broken.’

I did not say goodbye or watch Soterichus leave. Even if he was my father I had no interest in him now.

Thalia helped me hunt for Ferret. She was very methodical. She said she had had to hunt for lost creatures before. I bet she meant Jason. Our searching made him agitated, so Thalia wound him up and fastened him in a huge basket. She didn’t think I noticed, but as she fed his coils into it, she ran her hands over his body, which I guessed was to check if she could feel Ferret inside him. After she tied down the lid of the basket, we could hear Jason thumping about and trying to break the container so he could escape and cause havoc.

I had once thought a python would be an interesting pet to have, but now I just hated Jason. He was a killer. I hid my feelings, which I am very good at, but I was already deciding I would prove what had happened to Ferret. If I could find any bits of him, I would hold a proper funeral. And then I would make those responsible pay for his death.