The Stainless Steel Rat Gets Drafted

Chapter 20

"You're an escaped criminal, captain." He was smiling wickedly, enjoying himself. I still had nothing to say. "That's what was reported. They sent a chopper rushing out here for all of your equipment. Only after the MPs left did I remember how you were always worrying about those canteens. At the time I thought it was just the booze. Since they said you were an offworlder spy I began to think different. So I looked close and found this stuffed bird. Before I could turn it in, I heard how you escaped. So I thought I would just keep watch in case you wanted to get it back. Seems I thought right. Now - climb out of there slowly and keep your hands in sight."

I had no choice. But at least my brain was in gear again after the disconnecting shock of his appearance. "I would like the bird back, sergeant."

"I'm sure you would. But why should I give it to you?"

"To save lives. With it I can contact the League Navy and end this invasion before someone is killed."

"I don't mind killing." His smile was gone and there was a brutal edge to his voice I had never heard before. "I'm a soldier - and you are a spy. I am going to turn you and your cagaling bird in. This is going to mean a lot to my career."

"And you put your miserable military career ahead of the lives of harmless, unarmed civilians?"

"You bet your sweet chunk, I do."

I started to tell him just what I thought of him. But didn't. There had to be some way to get to him. "Do you take bribes, sergeant?"

"No."

"I'm not talking about little bribes. I am talking about the ten thousand credits in League currency that you will receive when this invasion ends. You have my word on that."

"A spy's word? Ten thousand or ten million - the answer is the same. You are for the chopping block, spy." There was a quick movement from the door behind him, a solid chunking sound, and the sergeant dropped to the ground. I dived for his gun.

"Don't," a voice said. "Just stay away from it." I looked up at Private, formerly Corporal, Aspya who was now pointing the gun at me that he had just used to bash the sergeant in the head.

"I wondered why the sergeant has been hiding in here all night. Now I found out." His face split suddenly in a crooked-toothed grin and he slipped his pistol back into the holster.

"I take bribes," he said. "But it has got to be twenty thousand."

I pointed at the bird. "Let me take that and you will get thirty thousand solid titanium League credits after the invasion is ended. At the League building in Brastyr. You have my word."

"My serial number is 32959727. There are a lot of Aspyas in the army."

Then he was gone. And so was I - before anyone else joined the party. I grabbed up the bird and ran just as fast as I could back to the river.

"Get moving into the tunnel!" I called out as I staggered up to my waiting companions. The shots were wearing off and I was stumbling. "Alarm, maybe soon, let's go." And we did. Back through the tunnel and on into the fields. I must have fallen somewhere along there because the next thing I knew I was in some woods and lying on the ground. The sky was light beyond the trees and my heart began to thud in panic. "The bird!"

"Here," Stirner said, holding it up. "You collapsed, so we took turns carrying you. The doctor said it would be wisest to let you rest since more stimulants might cause grave injury. We are hidden and safe now." I took the robot bird and shook my head in wonder. "You people are unbelievable - but you have my thanks. Was there a search?"

"We heard nothing. But you seemed so concerned that we went on while it was still dark. We should be safe here. If these woods are searched there is a place of safety close by."

"I hope so because they are going to be very irritated. There were difficulties encountered and the alarm will be out by now. So let us do what we came for." I groaned as I sat up and the doctor appeared with a ready needle. "This is only a painkiller," he said. "Stimulants are contraindicated now."

"You are a genius, doc."

The black bird, still smelling of jet fuel, sat heavily in my hands. Silent and still. Time to end that. I pressed down on its bill twice and its eyes opened.

"This is a recorded message from Captain Varod," it said, then rolled over on its back. "You will find a panel in the bird's chest. Open it."

"Light-years away and it is still orders, orders," I muttered as I groped among the feathers. Stirner and the doctor watched with wide-eyed attention. I found a button, pressed, and a feather-covered door flew open. There was a glowing control panel inside. Opening the door apparently activated the bird again because it began to croak out more instructions.

"Enter the location of the sun in this system, as well as the planetary coordinates, on the dials using the intergalactic eohemeris readings."

I grated my teeth. "How could I possibly know anything like that? Or anyone else on this planet?"

"If you do not have this information turn the power switch to full and press the activate button. Proceed." I did this and stepped back. The bird vibrated, opened its bill and squawked. From its gaping mouth there emerged a yellow aerial that moved slowly upward. When it was fully extended, over two meters of it, the bird's eyes began to glow. The aerial hummed briefly and the glowing eyes went dark. As slowly as it had emerged the aerial sank back and the bird was quiet again.

"Very interesting," Dr. Lum said. "Can you explain?"

"No. But I wish this stupid bird would."

"Let me explain," the bird croaked. "Since you did not enter the galactic coordinates of this planet an FTL message could not be sent. Precision is imperative in FTL communication. Therefore a prerecorded radio message was transmitted. All League bases and ships have been alerted. When it is received its source will be noted and this spybird will be informed."

"If you are still functioning!" I shouted and raised my foot to stamp on the bird, but was restrained by the doctor. The bird was still speaking.

"I am shutting down now to save power. Keep close to this communicator which will be activated when we are within signaling distance."

"Keep close to it!" I shouted. "I'll probably have to have it buried with me." I saw the way the two of them were looking at me so restrained my anger. "Sorry. Got carried away there. With good reason."

"It has to do with distance, doesn't it?" Stirner asked.

"Bang on." I had forgotten that he was an engineer. "An FTL transmission, faster than light, is almost instantaneous, even at stellar distances. But radio waves move at the speed of light - and how far is the nearest star from here?"

"Three point two light-years."

"Wonderful. So even at the million to one chance there is a League planet or base near that sun it would still be over three years before the cavalry arrives. Or it could be ten, twenty - or five hundred. By which time you, I and the invasion will be a part of history."

"You have done your best," the doctor said. "You cannot berate yourself."

"I sure can, doc. I take first prize in the self-berating stakes when it comes to losing. Since I don't like to lose."

"You have great security of resolve, I envy you."

"Don't. It's a pose. Did you get the water bottle out of the tree on the way back here?"

"Assuredly. Let me get you some."

I leaned against the tree, sipped the water, pushed the silent bird with my toe. And thought hard. Then sighed.

"There is still a solution. But not an easy one. I have to get into one of their spacers. And into the communications room and send a message from there."

"It sounds dangerous," Stirner said. I laughed hollowly.

"Not only dangerous - but suicidal…" I shut up as I heard a distant shout.

"They are searching for you," Stirner said, helping me to my feet. "We must go quickly."

The doctor helped me up - which was a line idea since I was definitely shaky on my feet. It was also cheering that we did not have far to go, only to the edge of the woods nearby. As we looked out from the concealing shrubbery we could see the rolling countryside beyond. A row of electricity towers marched across it, bearing heavy wires slung from insulators. The row of towers ended here. The wires came to ground in a solid concrete building. Stirner pointed at it.

"The aerial cables go underground here."

"So do we," I said pointing at the distant line of approaching soldiers, "if you don't do something quick."

"Be calm," he advised calmly. "This junction station will block-their view of us. Forward."

He was right. We scuttled out of hiding and plastered ourselves against the concrete wall. Next to a red-painted metal door that was covered in skulls and crossbones and warnings of instant death. None of which deterred Stirner, who flipped up a plate to disclose a key pad. He punched in a quick number then pulled the door open. We moved smartly inside as he closed and locked the heavy door behind us.

"What if they try to follow us?" I asked, looking around the well-lit room. There was little to see other than the heavy cable that entered from the ceiling and vanished into the floor.

"Impossible. They will not know the keying number. If they enter a wrong number the door seals and an alarm is sent to power central."

"They could break it down."

"Not easily. Thick steel set in concrete. Is there any reason why they should?"

I couldn't think of one and I was feeling cagally after the walk. I sat down, then lay down, closed my eyes for a second.

And woke up with a taste in my mouth like a porcuswine's breath.

"Yuk…" I gurgled. ~

"I am very glad you slept," the doctor said, swabbing off my arm and sticking it with a hypo. "Rest is the best medicine. This injection will eliminate residual fatigue symptoms and any pain."

"How long have I been out?"

"All day," Stirner said. "It is after dark. I have been outside and the soldiers are gone. We were going to awaken you soon in any case. Water?"

I gurgled most of it down and sighed. I felt much better. I didn't even sway when I stood up. "Time to go." The doctor frowned.

"It might be better to wait until the injection takes hold."

"I will walk off my troubles, thank you. We have been away a long time and I tend to worry."

My shakiness wore off as we walked. The woods were silent, the searchers long gone, and we had the world to ourselves. Stirner led the way at his usual cracking pace. The doctor kept an eye on me and soon called a halt so he could plug his analysis machine into my arm. He was satisfied with the result and our trek continued. Putting one foot in front of the other was enough to keep me occupied until we reached the outskirts of the city again. With one look at the buildings all my forebodings returned.

I was right, too. It was still dark when we reached the first homes, moving silently between the cottages and gardens of suburbia to avoid the guarded main streets. The back door of our refuge was unlocked: we slipped in and locked it behind us.

"You have the bird!" Morton cried gleefully when we entered. I nodded and threw it on to the couch, dropped myself next to it and looked around. All of the others were gone.

"That is the good news," I said. "The bad news is that it may be some time before help arrives. The call for help went out by radio - which could take a mighty long time."

"That is very bad indeed," Morton said and his face sank instantly into lines of despair. "While you were away they started taking hostages. Zennor got on the TV and said that he is going to shoot them, one at a time, until everyone goes back to work. He says that he will execute the first person at dawn - and one every, ten minutes after that until he gets cooperation."

He dropped his face into his hands and his voice was muffled, trembling. "The soldiers came up this street, were going to search this house. So everyone here, Sharla, all the others went out to them. Surrendered so I would not be found. They are now captives, hostages - and are going to be shot!"