The Tempestuous Career of Molly Murdock

The alarm went off at quarter to six. She fumbled for it and turned it off and forced herself to swing her legs out of the bed and sit upright, knowing that she was too exhausted to risk sliding back into the secret depths of her sleep. She sat on the edge of the bed for a few moments, huddled, drowsy — a small blonde woman, trim as a dancer, slowly fitting herself into the urgencies of this special day. As she padded out to put coffee on, she was aware, in a lonely way, of the silence of her house, the emptiness of the other beds. After her shower, she felt the slow return of her energy and the fluttering of excitement. She had packed the night before and laid out what she would wear. She was at her dressing table, combing her hair, when the phone rang. “Hello?”

“I thought maybe I’d missed you, Molly.”

“You’re up very early, Charlie.”

“I couldn’t sleep. I said hard words to you yesterday.”

“Yes, indeed you did.”

She heard his weary sigh. “I’ve been thinking it out. It’s not you making me look bad on this deal. It’s the way that Texan is handling it. You’ll have a big chance to put the knife in me when you get to Houston, honey.”

“So you didn’t want me to go away mad?”

“You’ve worked for me ever since Max died, and we’ve got along pretty good, haven’t we?”

“Charlie dear, please don’t plead. You don’t have to. I’m not in this to build an empire. I’ve got a husband and babies. Why should I knife you? If Mr. Hamilton asks me just why you blocked my program, I can make your reasons sound good, and I will.”

“I’m sorry it ever entered my mind you might do anything else. Ever since Mr. Hamilton bought control, I haven’t been thinking too good.”

“Don’t worry about it, Charlie. I’ll phone you from Houston and tell you how things are going.”

“Maybe I should have been looking for a job lately.”

“Cheer up, boss. It’s a beautiful morning in July. The company is making money. Everything will come up roses.”

Molly Murdock finished her packing and put her suitcase and travel case by the front door. After she had checked the windows, she poured her second cup of coffee and walked restlessly through the house. She stood in the doorway of the children’s room and felt a stir of discontent as she looked at Joanie’s bed and Lucy’s crib. She should be with them and Tom in his mother’s old farmhouse in Vermont, awakening to spend a lazy, golden summer day with them.

As she was rinsing her coffee cup, she heard the sound of John Quinn’s car in the driveway. She carried her luggage out the front door. He came, with long strides, to take the suitcase. He was a year or two younger than Molly, a tall, intent, tumultuous man, with dark hair and brows.

“So you can look like a college senior off to a house-party weekend. Good-morning, and damn your innocent eyes, Molly Murdock.”

“Be civil to your elders, sonny,” she said, and walked with him to his car.

As he backed out of the drive, he said, “It will be twenty minutes to the airport at this time of day, so we’re running a little ahead. How much sleep did you get?”

“Three hours and a bit. And you?”

“I sacked out in the office for nearly an hour. Got home in time to shower and change. Cathy had me all packed, bless her, and roused the little ones to kiss Daddy good-by. Our brain-baby is as good as I could make it, Molly. It’s in my dispatch case, right on top. Take a look.”

She opened the dispatch case and took out a copy of the report, titled “Revised Sales and Promotion Program for Andro Cosmetics.” It was bound in pink plastic. “Pink!” she said.

“A last-minute decision. We are not dealing with forgings, castings, or industrial solvents, Molly. This concerns the adornment of the female, and maybe it looks frivolous, but its quality of research is anything but.”

“I think it works,” she said, and turned to the final section, the summary and recommendations, which had not been finished until almost midnight. She read it slowly and carefully.

“Will it impress the Texan?” he asked.

“How can we tell, Johnny? We made our guess as to the kind of man he is. We decided he likes to give the impression of making compulsive, irrational decisions, but bases them on fact. If we’re wrong, we’re wrong.”

He stopped for a traffic light and looked at her. “It’s so much easier for you, Molly. You have so much less at stake.”

“Your eye is twitching.”

“It’s my built-in danger signal. I’ve got to get some sleep on that plane. When I get too close to the edge, I go around winking at everybody.”

He put the car in the parking lot and locked it. After they had checked in, they still had thirty-five minutes before their flight would load, so they went to the coffee shop.

Quinn stirred his tea and said, “It still doesn’t seem real to me, Molly. He whistles, and we go running off to Houston. And my charming boss, the amiable Mr. C. C. Hollis, is suddenly neither charming nor amiable.”

“Charlie Marks phoned me this morning. Highly nervous. Very friendly.”

Quinn frowned. “I suppose it’s a typical Ross Hamilton move, to summon the flunkies, and make the brass nervous. I suppose it’s a sort of big, brave opportunity for me; but right now, I’m so scared that I keep remembering the whole thing is your fault and — I wonder how smart it was.”

“But I didn’t know this was going to happen, Johnny! I explained how it happened.”

“I know. One innocent little remark, and suddenly my glorious future turns into a table-stakes game.”

As he lapsed into a somewhat moody silence, she pondered all the links of the long chain of accident and circumstance. It took considerably more than one innocent remark to send anyone roaring off to Texas.

It started with a fine marriage eight years before, a marriage that came about merely because she took an elective course called Philosophy 118 (Ethics). At midterm, the professor became ill, and the class was taken over by Mr. Thomas Murdock, a new instructor on a fellowship, a dear, gangling man, concealing both his shyness and his dedication behind a studied irony, a corrosive wit, an impatience with all muddy reasoning and partial effort. There could be no cure for all the tender yearnings except to marry him, a blissful feat accomplished three days after her graduation.

He agreed, after the honeymoon summer, that it made good sense for her to work. Instructors were receiving considerably less than apprentice carpenters, and Molly was, of course, full of such churning, inexhaustible energy that housewifing one tiny apartment was like restricting Univac to the computation of grocery bills. He admitted to a certain medieval distaste for the working-wife concept, but agreed that his objections were emotional rather than practical. With Molly working, they could live better, build up a reserve, and finance his doctorate sooner.

There was never any doubt about Tom’s destiny. He had a rare magic, that articulate ability to spread the wondrous world of ideas in such a compelling way that young minds were inflamed by the adventure and the discovery. Of men who teach, perhaps one in a thousand has that rare gift. It was unthinkable that he might consider some more profitable career. Teaching was his satisfaction and his existence.

They agreed it would be better if she didn’t work at the university; faculty wives have problems of protocol, compounded by such mutual employment. She could type accurately and rapidly. She was good at figures. She could write lean, forceful prose. Andro Cosmetics had just moved into a new plant only three miles from the campus. She applied there and was hired as a file clerk and typist in the sales division at fifty-two fifty a week, a salary heart-breakingly close to what Tom was paid as an instructor.

As Max Andro explained to her much later, after so many things had happened, she brought to that menial clerical job certain characteristics that always differentiate what Max called “the zecutive-type peoples.” She had an avid curiosity about how everything was done and why it was done in that manner. She had the energy of a platoon of Marines. She was totally indifferent to what people thought of her. And she did her work more quickly and more accurately and more completely than was expected or anticipated.

She went to work in the fall, and by February, she knew every process in the production areas, every office procedure in all departments, all interrelationships of authority and responsibility, all plans, programs, and problems in the marketing of the Andro line. She watched, thought, and asked questions. And when she saw anything that looked stupid, careless, or unwise, she popped a terse, dated memo into the suggestion box. After many weeks had passed and no action had been taken on any suggestion, she had copies made of the carbons of her suggestions, mailed them special delivery to Max Andro’s home, along with a note saying, “Am I dropping feathers down wells? Is the suggestion box never emptied? Or are all my ideas ridiculous?”

Max Andro summoned her to his office the following Monday morning. He was a broad, bald man with small, hooded eyes, great impassivity, chronic asthma, and an accent often imitated in the trade. She sat across the desk from him. He breathed audibly as he leafed through her memos.

“This one,” he said suddenly. “ ‘New package on Princess Fifty is a fiasco. Who would ever buy a second bottle?’ ” He took the item in question out of a desk drawer and pushed it to her. “Show the fiasco.”

She took the bottle. “It’s very graceful and pretty and feminine and impractical. A woman is going to take out the stopper and lay it down on a flat surface, like this. It rolls like a ball. See? If there were a flat spot or if it were tapered, okay. But when it rolls into her lap and spots her skirt, she’s going to remember it. Besides that, the base on the bottle is too narrow. Look.” She hit the edge of the desk; the open bottle fell over, and the pungent fluid spilled toward Max Andro.

He pushed his chair back with astonishing agility and caught the fluid before it dripped onto the rug. “What you doing?” he demanded.

“Showing you a fiasco, Mr. Andro.”

He stared at her and then began to laugh. He sat down, chuckling, and then the heavy sound died away. “Gets too big, this place,” he said morosely. “Too big. One time, before you were born, me and one boy to help, working in my cellar, we were Andro Cosmetics. Mixing, packaging, labeling. The car was full, I’d go sell. Come back and make more. The lotion only. That was first.” He tapped the stack of her memos. “None of these I saw. Fourteen are here. Two are wrong. Eight are right, but not important. Four are important. Those I should be seeing. Today I bang together some heads. Okay.”

She sensed a note of dismissal and started to stand up.

“Keep sitting there, please.” He studied her, his expression approving. “Pretty girl, eh?”

“Thank you, Mr. Andro.”

“But not weak and helpless, eh? What you want?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I had your card brought here first. Finished college. Married to a teacher. Good typist. Put these notes in the box. Mail copies to me. What kind of typist is this we got here? Some people going to hate you for this, Mrs. Molly Murdock. Your neck is out. For what reason, eh?”

She frowned and said slowly, “People who put up suggestion boxes must want to encourage suggestions. If all I did was type things I couldn’t understand, I’d go out of my mind. So I just tried to learn something about the company, and when I saw something I thought could be improved, I wrote a suggestion. When nothing happened, I decided to make something happen. If people hate me for that, they’re being very small and silly. If I’m useful, I’ll stay. If I’m a nuisance, I’ll go work somewhere else.”

“What do you want right now from Max Andro? More money?”

“That would be nice. But mostly I’d rather be doing something more interesting than typing and filing.”

He smiled broadly, then pressed the switch on his intercom and said, “Send in to me Harry Burkett.” He leaned back and said, “You know Harry?”

“I know he’s in charge of sales promotion and advertising, but I’ve never talked to him.”

“For ten dollars more a week, you’re working for him. He won’t like it. He won’t like you. Women who work for him, they cry twice a day, like a coffee break.”

“That’s the silliest thing I ever heard of!”

“I think you are going to be one big surprise to Harry.”

That was the way it all started. Burkett assigned her pointless, boring chores. He was excessively, sneeringly nasty. She soon realized he was trying to force her to quit, and by that summer, she understood why he was frightened of her. Harry Burkett was an insecure, incompetent man. In spite of the fact that all Andro advertising was handled through the Darmond, Birch, and Hollis agency, Harry Burkett had built up a large departmental staff within the company, composed — with the sole exception of Molly — of people who feared him. At that time, the annual fee for the agency’s services came to three and a half million dollars; but Harry Burkett picked at and criticized every campaign the agency devised, with the result that their impact was seriously weakened. Once his reluctant approval had been obtained, he complained endlessly about how the agency operated. He was always starting new market-research projects, which either duplicated existing surveys or were without point. When anybody, from Max Andro down, made the mistake of questioning Harry Burkett, he inundated him with such a relentless flood of jargon that he was happy to move his numbed attention out of range.

C. C. Hollis, who was in charge of the Andro account, considered it the dreariest one he’d ever handled; but he was a careful man and not about to endanger the account by confiding his problems to a slip of a girl who had a genius for asking penetrating questions. Nevertheless, it was pleasant to take such a handsome child to lunch and explain the hearty, smiling jungle of the agency world and see the quick comprehension in her eyes.

On their third luncheon, the handsome child smiled at him and said, “I lied when I told you Harry Burkett sent me to you to talk about the Andro account.”

“What?”

“I’ve been phoning in sick and then coming to town to talk to you, Mr. Hollis. Harry Burkett would fracture all his gaskets if he knew about it. I know he has an appointment with you tomorrow, so I’ve run out of time, haven’t I?”

“Molly, you’re putting me in a dreadful situa—”

“Oh, it’s going to get much much worse, Mr. Hollis. Because I’m going to go to Mr. Andro, and I’m going to lie a little bit more. I’m going to tell him about these lunches, and I’m going to report to him how you’ve confided in me and told me Harry Burkett is a fool and a terrible handicap to the proper servicing of the Andro account.”

“I’ll deny that!”

“What good will that do? Harry is so insecure he’ll be forced to yank the account — even if Max believes you instead of me. And if Max believes me, and you don’t back me up, he’ll get rid of Harry anyway, and then where will you be? I guess all you can do is tell me the truth, so I won’t have to lie to Max Andro.”

Mr. C. C. Hollis stared at her. “You look so gentle, Molly!”

“I guess I am. But I get impatient, sort of.”

“May I never be the target of your gentle impatience, child.” He downed the dregs of his Martini and then began to talk. “We finally gave up trying to carry our message to Max Andro, and we accepted Harry Burkett as a thorn we would have to get used to, a penalty that goes with the Andro account. He is a meddler, a whine, a scold, a pretentious idiot. Knowing he will botch everything we do, just to make himself look important, we have become ever more pedestrian in our approach to Andro. At the moment, you people are not getting full value for your advertising dollar. We welcome and encourage constructive client participation in our thinking, but we deplore the untutored meddlers who soften the impact and image we try to achieve.” He smiled. “In fact, my dear, your boss is such a notorious nincompoop that around our shop whenever some other client tries to gut a good program for trivial reasons, we call that act Burketteering.”

“And I may quote you?”

“You will, anyway.”

“How many people should there be in that department at Andro?”

“If you make full use of all agency services to which you are entitled, one person and a secretary should be able to handle it.”

“Could I handle it, do you think?”

“Dear girl, I suspect you could head up the teamsters’ union.”

“Would we get top agency talent on our account?”

“Out of gratitude alone, even if there were no other good reasons.”

She wrote a confidential ten-page report to Max Andro, cut the ten pages to six, and the six pages to three. She made an appointment with him and sat very still while he read it.

He sighed and placed it squarely in front of him. “So fourteen people I should let go. Comes to — what is it here? — ninety-seven thousand three hundred dollars annual payroll. Plus overhead factors saved. Pretty little girl is executioner, eh?”

“If you hadn’t felt something was wrong, you wouldn’t have put me in there when Harry obviously didn’t want me around, Mr. Andro.”

His eyes widened momentarily, and then he nodded. “I hear some things in town. Little jokes I don’t understand so good. Each year, Harry talks louder and longer and wants more people working for him. He make you cry some?”

“He came close just once.”

“So you hate him, eh? Clobber him good, eh?”

She stared at Max Andro. “Don’t be ridiculous! I feel terribly sorry for the poor guy. He’s never really understood his own job, and the tension has been ruining his health. He has almost twenty-five years with the company, Mr. Andro. You could fix the pension thing for him. His kids are through college.”

“So easy for you, eh? So kind in the heart. Suppose I call him in and show him this and ask him what the hell?”

“If you insist on doing it that way, I insist on seeing him first. I’ll give him my copy of that thing and tell him just why I had to do it.”

“Ho! You insist? You tell Max Andro a thing or two, eh?”

She shrugged. “Or I walk out.”

“Good-by to career?”

She stared at him. “Career? I’m just working for a little while to help out.”

He hit the report with his fist. “In here, black and white, you say you can take Harry’s job.”

“I had to do that.”

“Why?”

“I couldn’t recommend you get rid of a man and then go hide someplace, could I? The least I can do is give myself the opportunity to be clobbered.”

“Such a job when you are twenty-three, it is a career. This is a funny business, full of old-lady gossip. This happens, and you are a legend already overnight. And a target. I become a fat old fool giving a big job to his little blonde girl friend, eh?”

“But nobody could believe—”

“Don’t have such a horror on the face,” he said, chuckling. “It makes an insult to me, eh? What else can they say? That such a pretty young thing has a business brain like IBM can’t invent yet? Zecutive-type peoples should come in such a package? To be such a target as you will be is a career, not working to help hubby.”

“Tom and I want a family. I won’t be working very long.”

“So you leave me. Good-by, Max. That is fair?”

“For goodness’ sake, I’ll find somebody wonderful and have him all trained, and you know it.”

“Why do we let all Harry’s people go?”

“Instead of trying to shift them? Because he’s sort of ruined them. They’re terribly cowed. They can find work, all of them, Max. I’m sorry, Mr. Andro. I didn’t mean to—”

“You call me Max, please. I think we are friends, Molly. With medals, speeches, kind words, Harry Burkett I will push out gentle. And maybe you get the job after Harry is gone a while. If you get it, what do you want? For yourself.”

“I guess — about a hundred and twenty-five dollars a week, Max.”

“Very small.”

“I... I really don’t want to make too much.”

“Jealousy for the husband, eh?”

“Sort of. But I’d like some other things, if I could have them.”

“What are they, Molly?”

“I’d like Harry’s office and a chance to decorate it. And an expense account, and the use of a company car, and the authority to hire my own secretary, and, if I do the work well, a little private bonus at the end of the year I can tuck away for emergencies.”

He shook his head slowly, almost sadly, and said, “Those things you can have if I stay soft in the head and give you such a job. But I wish such hutzpah my two sons could have. Shouldn’t now you remind me how much money you are saving my company?”

“I’d rather not, because I might ask you to spend a lot more than that next year, Max.”

“Go now away on tiptoe, please, because a headache could start on me any minute. You are honest. It is a great strain on an old man. It went out of style in my youth. Go work quietly for Harry.”

One evening two months after that talk with Max Andro, Molly carried the dinner dishes to the kitchen of the small apartment and returned with a tray on which were a new and expensive bottle of brandy and two glasses, gleaming in the candlelight.

“I’m almost certain it isn’t my birthday,” her husband said wonderingly.

“The strangest thing happened to me at the office today.”

“Really?”

“Why, yes. They made me director of sales promotion and advertising. And sort of doubled my pay. Now really, darling! You don’t have to boggle at me. You read my report and everything. I told you it was going to happen.”

He shook his head and murmured, “The emperor’s clothes.”

“What?”

“The child was the one who realized the king was naked. Molly, my darling, you have that perfect clarity of vision that comes from a supra-normal simplicity.”

“Sir! You are speaking of the woman you love!”

“I really couldn’t believe your Mr. Andro would take such a chance. He must be a very wise and very reckless fellow, dear Molly.”

“He’s very sweet and quite old and tired, and I have the feeling I amuse him. I want you to meet him soon. Oh, darling, this job is going to be such wonderful, scary fun!”

“Congratulations,” he said, in a rather dry way, and busied himself with the brandy.

“Are you upset about anything?” she asked.

He looked at her, and she thought his expression oddly remote until he smiled. “I was getting used to living with a typist. Now I find myself consorting with an executive.” They touched glasses, and he said, “Here’s to the most beautiful and unlikely executive in the world.”

“Thank you, dear.”

“Just remember one thing. I do not think you would be terribly happy as an organization woman. You’re not devious in the accepted ways. Remember that Andro is a one-man outfit. He can afford to be impulsive.”

“Yes, dear.”

“And as long as you have nothing to lose, they can’t hurt you.”

“Nobody in the world except you can ever hurt me, darling.”

During that first year, a great many people in the trade made the mistake of not taking Molly Murdock seriously. Too many of them saw just a lithe and pretty young woman, with pale-golden hair, delicate features, and a refreshing directness, into which they mistakenly read naïveté and vulnerability. She asked a great many questions of everyone and seemed to believe everything she was told. And it was great fun, of course, to visit Molly Murdock in her office, whether you were with Andro or with the agency or with a competitor. Old Max Andro, with senile indulgence, had fixed her up with an office that was like a studio apartment. It was fun to go there for drinks and snacks and shoptalk. Molly’s secretary was a droll and vivacious brunette, named Jackie Thatcher, and there seemed to be no perceptible employer-employee relationship between them.

By the end of the year, Molly Murdock had earned a great deal of astonished respect. Somehow, Darmond, Birch, and Hollis had been pushed into award-winning efforts on behalf of Andro Cosmetics. Andro had secured some new and very favorable distribution arrangements, and production capacity had to be increased. All those people, both inside and outside the Andro organization, who had been of genuine help to Molly found their own circumstances improved. Those who had tried to mislead her and patronize her found themselves in trouble. She was not vindictive; she merely did all possible favors for the people she liked and totally ignored the ones she didn’t.

The anti-Molly faction eventually dubbed her “the poisonous pixie” and told one another she was dangerously ambitious, vicious, and cold of heart. They said she had used Max Andro not only to squash all competition within the company, but also to bulldoze Darmond, Birch, and Hollis into using shoddy techniques to bloat the sales of second-rate products.

On the day all this was reported to her, she went raging to Max Andro, ready to quit.

He heard her out and said mildly, “Suppose you’re a sweet, simple, harmless little girl, so everybody loves her, what good to me are you, anyhow? Anybody in this world does a job, Molly, you can believe me it is like putting your head through a canvas hole peoples should pay a dollar to throw pies. What you got is an orderly mind, energy for five peoples, fairness so everybody is glad working with you, and hutzpah like a bandit.”

“Max, what is this hutzpah you keep telling me I have?”

“Hutzpah is what has a boy who kills his parents and says to the court, ‘Be merciful, because I am an orphan.’ If I am a nice guy, Molly, I am still making up lotion in a cellar. Peoples hate me. It’s sort of the cost. Be glad, Molly, they should call you poison. Laugh at them.”

But then, after more than two years of pressure and achievement in her job, she learned she was pregnant. She knew the “career” was over, and she was not at all wistful about ending it. She spent her last working months training a man named Bill Pace. She had found him working for a pharmaceutical house, had earmarked him for the job, and had talked Max into hiring him. Also, during those last months, she and Tom had bought a house near the university. Tom had become an associate professor by that time, and by putting their savings into the house, the mortgage payments were reduced to an amount they could handle on Tom’s salary.

The new squalling miracle that was Joan Weston Murdock reduced the memories of Andro Cosmetics to the status of a hobby so long neglected she could not remember the rules.

And marriage seemed to acquire a new and richer texture which...

“Hey!” John Quinn said, and touched her arm. It startled her, and she turned and looked at him. “Sleeping with your eyes open?” he asked. “That’s our flight they’re announcing.”

“Dreaming, I guess,” she said. “Wondering exactly how I got to where I seem to be. Reserved seats, courtesy of Ross Hamilton Industries, Incorporated. Nothing done by halves.”

After they had fastened their seat belts, Quinn said, “I’ve seen pictures of the guy. What is he like, though?”

“No phony Texas trademarks, Johnny. No boots and big hats. Clothes by J. Press. Accent by Princeton. He isn’t easy. He’s watchful and subdued, but there is a — a quality of importance about him, and he has that trick of making everybody he talks to feel important.”

“Just how did that conversation go?”

Molly shrugged. “About an hour after I’d met him officially, he came to my office. He said he had heard marvelous things about me. I took that with a grain of salt. He said he was very sorry about my decision to quit again, and he said he understood I had come back the second time as a special favor to Max Andro when Max was dying, but he would consider it a great favor if I would stay for just a few weeks until he could take over the operation. I agreed. And then he asked me if there was any pet project I would be — sorry to abandon. So, Johnny, I told him about our unapproved project. I said there was a young man who had been working on the Andro account for over a year, named John Quinn. I told him that you and I felt it was time to take a gamble on upgrading the public image of Andro Cosmetics by socking big money into intensive promotion of a new luxury line, but that I had had no success selling that idea to Charlie Marks, any more than you’d had any luck talking to C. C. Hollis about it. He said maybe I could talk to some of his people about it before I left.”

“And here we are,” John Quinn said. “Thanks a lot, Molly.”

“Don’t be so nervous about it, Johnny. We’re taking him a very good report. And the idea makes sense.”

The airplane took off, with that ponderous, heart-stopping unreality of the jet, gliding upward at an improbable angle that dropped the world away in moments.

When they had leveled, Quinn unlatched his belt and said, “I have to be nervous, Molly. I’m just not big enough to be a lone wolf. To C.C., I’m not being fearless, just impertinent. You’ll have to take me off the hook with him.”

“I’ll try.”

He sat in frowning silence for a few moments and then said, “Max Andro brought you back twice? I didn’t know that.”

“Oh, yes. After Joanie was born, I settled into being the happy housewife. I thought I’d left everything in good shape at Andro. Bill Pace was a very good man. Jackie Thatcher was there to keep the routine things under control. And I had two other good people to backstop Bill. I knew Bill and Jackie would be sympatico. But they — got along too well.”

“I heard about that.”

“Who didn’t? Love walked in one day. And they were nice people, but not nice enough to handle that. It smashed Bill’s marriage, but his wife wouldn’t divorce him, and Jackie was too staunch to adjust to half a loaf without cracking up. So she did, thoroughly. I guess guilt got Bill onto the bottle, and after my whole operation there was nearly completely messed up, poor Max brought in somebody who finished the job. Then he came after me to put the house in order again. I didn’t want to go back, but Max was an incomparably stubborn man. He worked on me, and he worked on Tom, and he offered a ridiculous amount of money. So — I finally agreed to go back and get it running again.”

“How long was that supposed to take?”

“Six months. But I was there two years. Until our Lucinda came along and got me out of the rut. I left it in the enormously capable hands of Gil Jamison, that time.”

“I know. Gil was a wonderful man.”

“Max had to give him a stock deal to get him, you know.” She laughed in a rather bitter way. “The same deal he gave me to get me to come back once again after Gil drove into the back end of an unlighted truck.”

The stewardess served them the champagne breakfast. As they ate, they talked about the report, reassuring each other, telling each other Ross Hamilton would be impressed.

She glanced at Quinn and saw him looking at her in a speculative way. “What’s the matter, Johnny?”

“I was just wondering. Was it easier for Max to get you to come back to work the second time?”

“Yes. Max had his first stroke a week after Gil Jamison was killed. He sent for me and asked me to bring Tom along. He knew he was dying and was afraid he would be a long time dying. He was afraid the company would be gutted and there would be that much less to leave his children and grandchildren. He wanted me to take my job back and also serve as his ears and eyes. He was a dear man, and he had been more than decent to me, Johnny. I think I owed him that, so I went back with a lot less — discussion about it.”

“No other reasons?”

“With the money, I could hire somebody very good to look after my babies and still have lots left over after taxes, plus the capital-gains thing on the stock deal. I knew by then I was good, and there’s no rule against selling yourself high. And we did need the money then.”

“Was it supposed to be six months again?”

“Are you being cynical? It’s lasted a year and a half. After Max got well enough to arrange the sale of his ownership interest, I agreed to stay until it went through. As you well know, he died before he could make the deal he wanted, and one of Ross Hamilton’s corporations bought Max’s stock from his heirs. This is my swan song, Johnny. I’ll be out for good — and glad of it.”

“Real glad?”

“I have a family.”

“Is that an answer?”

“Are you trying to quarrel?”

“No, Molly. No quarrel. I’m concerned with my own survival. So I have to ask questions. You don’t have anything to lose. It makes everything so darn easy for you. Sure, we both believe in our idea, but maybe I’m going to be the guy who gets stuck with it if Hamilton goes for it.” He put his hand on her arm. “Consider this, Molly. Suppose he tells both of us to go ahead and carry the ball on this program? No strings. Will you still quit?”

“Of course!”

“Do you mean it?”

“It would be fun to work it out, but I’m not a career woman.”

“So you’d leave me in one hell of a mess, Molly. Without you, I’d be in a big bind, right between C. C. Hollis and Charlie Marks. After all, you brought me into this. Don’t you have some responsibility?”

“I think you’re dreaming, Johnny. If Ross Hamilton likes our ideas, he has his own people to go ahead with them.”

“But just suppose!”

She tilted her head and studied him. “I’m going to leave, Johnny. Charlie Marks knows it. Ross Hamilton knows it. And my husband knows it.”

“Is he jealous, your husband?”

She glared at him. “Don’t be an idiot! Tom’s work makes mine about as significant as — carving lip disks for Ubangi women.”

“Does he want you to quit?”

“Tom is used to having a part-time wife, but that doesn’t mean he likes the arrangement. The money has been nice, and I do have loads of energy. But with Max gone, Johnny, it’s all quite different. It isn’t as much fun any more. I’m not the little-girl genius any more, the way Max thought of me. I’m a veteran. I’ve had years of this pressure, and I don’t think I like what it has done to me. It’s toughened me in ways you wouldn’t understand. I’m thirty, Johnny. It’s time to go back to being what I was meant to be.”

“Is it? Or do you just have a feeling of obligation?”

“Now, really!”

“Molly, suppose you find you can’t keep yourself busy enough? Won’t you get bored and restless and irritable? What good will that do Tom and the kids?”

“Being a wife isn’t that easy.”

“So you’re a bad wife?”

“No! Darn you, stop twisting things.”

He leaned back and smiled at her. “I keep thinking of what a job we could do together if Hamilton should tell us to go ahead with it. We make a good team, Molly. You know that.”

“Of course I do.”

He chuckled. “I said that once too often to Cathy — how good a team you and I are.”

“What do you mean?”

“My little wife is apprehensive. She’ll be delighted when you retire from the business world.”

“What does she think I am!”

“Don’t get sore. She knows you’re a very lovely gal, but I guess her mother taught her never to trust a husband.”

“The disapproval of wives. That’s another thing I’ll be happy to give up,” she said bitterly.

“Everybody who’s worked with you knows you’ve played it straight.”

“So does Tom. And that’s all that matters to me, really.”

“But even the wise and wonderful Doctor Thomas Murdock will be a little easier in his mind when he has you all to himself.”

“What makes you say a thing like that?”

“Empathy, dear Molly. I imagined myself married to you. I checked out my reaction to your flying to Houston with Johnny Quinn. I decided I’d rather have you home.” He smiled at her, tilted his seat back, closed his eyes, and said, “Nudge me in Houston, boss lady.”

After he was asleep, she managed to cure her feeling of irritation with him by being mercilessly honest with herself. She realized she had become annoyed because he had come too close to some dangerous truths she had long been hiding from herself. She had begun to acquire the taste for maneuver, for the manipulation of human beings, and she recognized it as a taste for power. It was such a sweet and corrupt habit always to be given the choice tables, and sign the large tabs, and — because of Andro’s sponsorship of television programs — be on a first-name basis with celebrities.

The little girls were happy; they knew they were wanted. But it was not — face it squarely — as good a marriage as she made it sound. A remoteness had come into it, a kind of dry and careful courtesy.

She had phoned Tom in Vermont yesterday. The girls were fine. The days were bright and the nights chilly. The draft of the new book was going very well, and it looked as if he would meet the September deadline.

“You sound a million miles away,” she shouted into the phone.

“Vermont is a million miles away.”

“Darling, I have to go to Texas tomorrow morning.”

“You have to go where?”

“To Texas. Houston. I’ll be at the Allison Hotel.”

“The Allison Hotel. Houston.” She could tell by the tone of his voice that he was writing it down. “Ben and Ginny Hagerman live in Houston now.”

“I’d forgotten that, dear.”

“You don’t sound very pleased to be reminded. Won’t you look them up?”

“I’d like to, of course. There may not be time. I’ll be there just a day or two. Ross Hamilton sent for me.”

“Who?”

“Ross Hamilton. You know. The man who bought Andro. I told him about my idea for a new line. Charlie Marks wouldn’t listen. Now, all of a sudden, Hamilton wants me to make a presentation. I won’t be gone long.”

“That’s nice.”

“I should be able to quit in another few weeks and join you there.”

“That’s nice.”

“Is that all you can say?”

“What should I say?”

“Your enthusiasm overwhelms me.”

“What? I didn’t hear you, Molly. What did you say?”

“Never mind. Give my love to the gals.”

“Of course. Take care of yourself, Molly.”

“Good-by, dear.”

“Good-by, dear.”

Why should I expect wild enthusiasm from him? she thought. I’ve quit working too many times. After she hung up, she realized she hadn’t told him John Quinn was flying out with her. She had meant to tell him; it had not been a deliberate omission.

She sighed and tilted back her seat and looked at John. In his sleep, he had turned his face toward her. She looked at him with sympathy and fondness. Since he had been assigned to the Andro account as assistant to the account executive, they had worked on many projects together. He was very good, but perhaps not quite bold enough. Now, through her doing, he was in an awkward situation. She looked at the strong, masculine features, the harsh dark hair, the closed eyes, smudged with weariness. He slept with his lips slightly parted. She felt a bemused, welling tenderness, and quite suddenly she had the impulse to rest her hand on his tired cheek and press her mouth sweetly against his lips.

This, she realized, was dangerous nonsense. She wondered how such a degree of physical awareness could have been created so quickly. Their only proximity had been in their work. And suddenly she remembered Bill Pace and Jackie Thatcher and wondered if their relationship had started in just such a curious way.

Yes, John Quinn was a more than conventionally attractive young man. But such a dangerous impulse must be attributed to the adventure of being summoned to Houston and the exhaustion of too little sleep. And, she told herself, it wasn’t a sexy feeling, for goodness’ sake. I just feel a little bit sorry for him, and people look so sweet and defenseless when they are asleep, and I am — so darn restless lately.

She smiled to herself. It certainly would have wakened Johnny Quinn with a start. And it would have given his Cathy something to be apprehensive about.

She closed her eyes and told herself to think of other things; but as she drifted toward the edge of sleep, she was abruptly wakened by a sensory awareness of the pressure of his lips against hers. As soon as her eyes were open, she knew it was an illusion, but a curiously persistent one. She began to have the feeling he was smiling at her and perfectly aware of what she was thinking. She gave him a furtive, sidelong, guilty glance and saw that he was still asleep. This, she decided firmly, is a very poor time for me to be losing my mind. Or my morals. I have a husband, and I love him dearly, and I am a faithful, unadventurous wife. I have two lovely little girls. I shall soon join my family in Vermont.

But she could not doze off again.

When the seat-belt light went on, she nudged John Quinn. “Houston. Right down there.”

He rubbed his eyes and gave a great bone-creaking stretch and yawn.

“Feel better?” she asked.

“Frankly, I feel horrible, thank you. Did you sleep?”

“Hardly at all,” she said, and was annoyed to feel her face becoming hot. She turned and looked out the window so he would not notice.

They were met at the Houston terminal by two brisk, impersonal young men. They said Mr. Hamilton was sorry he couldn’t meet them in person. They said Mr. Hamilton had arranged to see them at two-fifteen, after lunch. One of them went after the baggage, and the other walked them to a limousine. They were driven to the Allison Hotel. One of the men confirmed the reservations at the desk, and the other rode up to the eleventh floor with them.

“You have this suite, Mrs. Murdock. Mr. Hamilton thought it might be convenient if he should ask for any additional work. Secretarial help can be sent over from the offices. Is it satisfactory?”

“It’s lovely,” Molly said.

“You’re farther down the hall, Mr. Quinn. If you and Mrs. Murdock could have lunch here, we shall meet you in the lobby at two o’clock. And please sign for anything you want.”

Ten minutes later, Quinn tapped at her door. “Livin’ high,” he said. “Maybe not for you, but for the lower echelons of agency servitude, it is way up on the hawg, missy. I got the bowl-of-fruit treatment, too, and the glad delight of the management at having me here — but no flowers, like you have.”

“Jealous? Have a vaseful. I have two.”

“No, thanks.” He looked at his watch. “Twenty after twelve. Let’s see if his lunch is as nice as his rooms.”

They went down and found a paneled grill. After they had ordered, John went to phone Cathy. When he came back, he was smiling in a somewhat apologetic way. “I hardly ever fly to Texas before lunch. She had to know if they got me back onto the ground the way they had it planned.”

“Wives like to know little things like that.”

“Don’t husbands?”

She felt slightly uneasy. “I’ll phone Tom this evening.”

“After the rates change?”

“Don’t needle me, Johnny. Please.”

“I’m sorry, honey. I’m nervous. When I’m nervous, I bite. Cathy asked to be remembered to you.”

“That’s very nice of her.”

“She’s a nice girl. She tries hard.”

“Johnny, that sounds condescending.”

“I didn’t mean it to. Maybe I meant it to sound a little impatient. I get a little impatient. Good lord, she’s secure enough. She should know I want to stay married to her, but she keeps acting as if I can’t be trusted around the comer. It gets wearing. And all the late hours haven’t reassured her. I’m boring you. Let me make a correction. I’m not nervous. Not at all. I’m terrified.”

She touched his hand. “Don’t be, Johnny. He’s just a rich Texan.”

They grinned at each other. “Murdock and Quinn against the world,” he said.

Ross Hamilton’s office was on the penthouse floor of the Commerce Bank Building. It was as big as a tennis court, and it had the look and flavor of a reading room in an old and exclusive men’s club, with paneled walls, deep leather chairs, bookshelves, fireplace, trophies, framed photographs, massive tables, a drift of cigar smoke and murmur of conversation. Ross Hamilton was there, with a thin, quiet man named Hooper and a younger, red-haired man named Hale. The five of them sat at a round table. John Quinn passed out copies of the special report, and in those surroundings, the pink plastic covers looked frivolous and contrived.

Hooper went through the report page by page. Hamilton turned at once to the conclusions and recommendations and read them with care. Hale riffled the pages once and pushed the report aside.

At first, the questions were mild, undemanding, and Molly felt the answers they were giving were inept. But as the questions became more searching, more demanding, both she and John Quinn lost their traces of stage fright and answered with the certainty that can come only from a complete knowledge of the subject.

At four o’clock, there were no more questions. The conference was over. As Quinn beamed, the three Texas money men looked at Molly in delighted wonder; they would have agreed with Max that this delicious blonde had the brain of an IBM machine. They excused themselves, and Molly and John Quinn were alone.

“Wow!” he said softly.

“There’s good research behind those questions, Johnny, and some good minds at work. I feel pommeled.”

“How did we do?”

“I haven’t the faintest idea. You sounded wonderful, Johnny.”

“Thanks. I didn’t feel so wonderful.”

Ross Hamilton came back, sat down, smiling at them. “The times I don’t listen to Hooper and Hale. I lose money. And that pleases them, of course. This time, I’m listening to them.”

“Do they approve?” John Quinn asked, a little too eagerly.

“Sometimes I wonder what my grandfather would think if I could take him on a tour of the top floors of this building. He was a wildcatter. He had no patience with what he called the paper peddlers. All we do here is the legal work and accounting for seventeen separate corporations. My grandfather found the oil, and this is what it has grown into. He would have plugged every hole if he’d known this was going to happen. Every decision we make here is based on how it will affect our tax picture.”

“It must lead to some curious decisions,” Molly said.

“Indeed it does. And we have an investment problem, too. Two years ago, we made some studies that convinced us we would be wise to get into what Mr. Hooper calls ‘buttons, bows, and nonsense.’ In other words, style and fashion items for the female market, where we have a volume production, high markup, and the accent on merchandising. And so we’ve picked up Andro Cosmetics, Davisson Products, Kempler Shoes, and Betty Marie Fabrics.”

“You don’t fool around,” Molly said.

Ross Hamilton smiled at her. “We expect to do very well. Mrs. Murdock, what do you suppose will be our problem area, common to the companies I’ve named?”

She frowned. “The sales and advertising, coordinated with design. You’re in a style area. Competition is rough.”

“And what is the biggest special problem within that area?”

Molly shrugged. “Finding the right people. That’s always been our problem at Andro.”

Ross Hamilton smiled at both of them in turn and said, “Don’t be too shocked if I tell you that I do not give a damn about your pretty pink report. It isn’t the sort of problem we’d have you fly here to discuss. And I don’t plague myself with decisions on that level.”

“Then what in the world are you—” John Quinn said.

“We’ve received detailed reports on both of you,” Ross Hamilton said. “You’re young. You have taste, energy, experience. We look for people like you, and there are few of them. Too many bright young people settle comfortably into some cozy little corner of a big corporation and wait for retirement.”

“I’m flattered, Mr. Hamilton,” Molly said, “but when I leave Andro, which will be very soon, I’m certainly not going to come and work for you. I’m going back into the housewife business, full time.”

“I’m not asking you to work for me, Mrs. Murdock. I’m not asking either of you to work for me. I think people with your abilities should be in business for themselves. That’s where the satisfaction is. And the profit.”

“You’ve lost me,” John Quinn said.

“We are in a position to finance a new advertising agency, to handle the accounts of the companies we are buying. I suggest we call it Quinn-Murdock. We can turn over the Kempler and Betty Marie accounts as soon as you two can lease space and assemble a staff. We can turn over Andro and Davisson a little later, and we can guarantee two more sizable accounts before the end of the year. We’ll lend you the initial working capital. I’ll come in personally for a one-third interest, but quietly. I won’t share in any draw. You can take out what you want, to start with — twenty-five, thirty-five, fifty. If you two could give it, say, ten years of top effort, I think you’d be in a position to unload and walk away with a substantial capital gain.”

Molly had the feeling she was only half comprehending what he was saying. It was as though she had to struggle to realize she was in Texas, wearing her hundred-and-eighty-dollar suit of Hong Kong silk in a shade of green that made her eyes look a gray-blue, listening to a strange, bland man tell her she had won some game she had not known she was playing. “Where is your advantage?” she asked in a small voice. “A kick-back on billing? Preferential rates? I don’t understand.” She glanced at John Quinn and saw that his natural pallor had turned to an astonishing chalkiness.

Ross Hamilton chuckled. “We’re not sharpshooters, Mrs. Murdock. Not on that level, at least. You are pleasantly modest. We get young effort. We get sparkle, enthusiasm, intensity, and — as Mr. Hale suggested to me — we get a quality of imagination that would lead to effective coordinated promotions of the products in which we are interested. It would be, in a sense, a captive agency, yes. But with the sort of people you are, wouldn’t that make your work more effective?”

“It would be a lot of billing,” Quinn said dreamily.

“Enough to give you an agency gross of thirty million when the package is complete, at current advertising-budget levels.”

Molly smiled wanly. “And the rabbit told Alice she would have to hurry or she would miss the tea party.”

“It’s all quite real,” Ross Hamilton said. In an unexpectedly gentle voice, he added, “Every decision I make changes somebody’s life. By now, I should be used to it. But I never am.”

Molly awoke from her daze and looked at Hamilton shrewdly. “You wouldn’t be in for a third because you need the money. So?”

“Mrs. Murdock, you would be completely at home in the business life of Texas, I assure you. Certain stipulations would be written into the partnership agreement. One of them would be that no new account could be taken on without the permission of all three partners.”

“And?”

“Accounting and auditing procedures must be approved by all three partners, and no contract over X dollars can be entered into without the approval of all three partners. Other than that, I give you my word, there will be no thumb on your neck.”

“Suppose we goof?” Quinn asked.

“You would lose your clients and be unable to solicit others.”

“A lot of people would be very anxious to see us goof it,” Quinn said.

“Does that alarm you?”

“Here’s what alarms me,” Quinn said. “I’m twenty-eight. I’ve been moving very well, I think, trying for the double-play ball whenever it has come my way. I moved from Yale to CBS to Young and Rubicam to Darmond, Birch, and Hollis, with careful timing, aiming at a partnership at thirty-five, and the money machine at forty-five, and a retirement to the academics of the profession by fifty-five, and when you reached out with the hook, it was the first time, believe me, when the footing has been unsound. Suddenly you have thrown the target years in my lap. This is thirty-five and forty-five combined. Let alone, I could win the ball game, in extra innings maybe. But when you are mentally set to bunt, what do you do with the fat pitch?”

“It depends on the inning, doesn’t it?” Hamilton asked, looking at his watch. “I’m going to have to apologize. I’d planned to have you out to the place for dinner, but I have to run over to Austin. I’ve set you up for three tomorrow afternoon, right here. That will give you time to think this over. Suppose you use some of the time working up a plan of the sort of organization you’ll want — size, departmentalization, floor space, and so on. You can work here or at the hotel. Phone Miss Babcock for any secretarial help you need.”

“It we decide to do it,” Molly said.

Hamilton’s heavy eyebrows moved upward slightly. “If you decide to do it, yes. Of course.”

John Quinn said hesitantly, “The whole deal is predicated on — both of us coming in?”

“Yes. You balance and complement each other. The last Andro promotion is perfect proof of that.”

“How about our plan?” Molly asked. “This pink project we slaved over?”

Hamilton stood up. “Quinn-Murdock can recommend it to the client, and Andro management can accept or reject.” He shook hands with Molly and Quinn and said, “Talking to you has convinced me we’ve come up with a good idea. See you both tomorrow.” He walked out quickly.

Quinn picked up the copies of the special report. “What’ll we do with these, woman?”

“I don’t think anybody really cares, somehow. They look indecent in this room. Bring them along, Johnny.”

They rode down in the special penthouse elevator. It was a little after five, and the office buildings were emptying. The windless heat of July made the air at street level tangible and enervating.

“Taxi, lady?” John Quinn said.

“Let’s sort of stroll, h’m? We’ll give them fits. They have to keep erecting all the buildings in front of us and tearing them down as soon as we get out of sight. And they have to pay all these people to act as if they lived in a place called Houston and were completely unaware of us.”

“What kind of kick are you on, Molly?”

“It takes different forms. Tom calls it my bedlam routine. It’s a special vision. It enables you to see the world is mad, and you are dreaming most of it, anyhow.”

He stopped her and took her hand and delicately pinched the flesh just above her wrist, without pain.

“Ow,” she said, dutifully, and they walked on.

“Quinn-Murdock,” he said. “It gives me an institutional feeling. Quinn and Murdock. Murdock and Quinn.”

“Or Quinndock, for cute? Let’s not talk about it.”

“Yes, but I wish there were a good way to stop thinking about it for a little while, Molly dear.”

“I keep wondering if he is a nice man.”

“He is a very nice man. He is a superb man. He is a veritable bank vault of a fellow. Ol’ Ross has great discrimination.”

“Marvelous instincts.”

“How can I be drunk without drinking?”

“You can be anything, because I am dreaming you, too. And let’s cling to our little dream of glory for a while, Johnny Quinn. Let’s have fun with it, before I kill it with a word.”

He stopped her and looked down into her eyes. “Before you what?”

“Before I say, ‘No, thanks,’ of course.”

“But you can’t!”

“Dear Johnny, dear friend, I am not the type.”

“Molly,” he said, and took her by the wrist. The people walking by gave them quick glances of curiosity.

“You’re hurting me,” she said.

“I’m sorry. Let’s go back to the hotel.”

“All right, Johnny.”

They went to her suite. The Ross Hamilton organization had made another gesture of hospitality. There was a tray with glasses, bottles of mix, sealed bottles of Scotch, bourbon, gin, and vodka.

“Well, now!” John Quinn said with hollow cheer. He lifted the lid of the ice bucket. “All we need is thirst.”

“Vodka and tonic, please,” she said. “Make it weak.”

Quinn handed her drink with a strange, formal little bow, and she carried it to a chair by the windows. “This is weak?” she said, making a face.

“Compared to this one. Let’s get to it. I just can’t let you throw—”

“I want a boy, you know.”

“What?”

“Poor Tom has to live in a welter of females.”

“So have a boy. You have my permission. As soon as we get Q-M off the ground, have him in good health.”

“I miss my children. I ache for them. My working made some sense, Johnny, but I’m running out of sense. I’m getting into excuses.”

“Molly, Molly, for heaven’s sake! Kiss them in the morning. Hug them at night. The fireside bit is for gals like Cathy.” He got up from the couch and began pacing. “You see, honey, I just can’t let you do this to me. I can’t permit it.”

“Permit it? That’s a big word.”

He whirled and faced her, hands outstretched. “Why is this exclusively your problem, your decision? How can you be so selfish about it? There are eight people in this thing, Molly. You and Tom, me and Cathy, and four children. So, because you have this crazy guilt feeling about working, you want to do something that will make you feel better about yourself. That’s all it is. Actually, you don’t give a damn about the other seven people.”

“That’s a dreadful thing to say to me!”

“I have to say it. I have to get you to the point where you’re thinking soundly about it, Molly. What is your obligation? Isn’t it, perhaps, to use all the talent and energy you have?”

“Stop it, Johnny! Stop it!” she said, getting to her feet.

He looked at her for a long moment of contemptuous silence. “Maybe it’s something else. Max thought you could do no wrong. Max made you look good, honey. Since he died, you’ve been out where the cold wind blows, and maybe you don’t like it. Maybe all this marriage-obligation thing is just a cover, and actually you’re scared you can’t cut it without kindly ol’ Max providing the muscle.”

She swung very quickly, without conscious thought, and gave him a ringing slap across the cheek. She saw his eyes widen and then narrow, saw his hand come up quickly and then go slowly back to his side. She saw the red fingermarks appear against his pallor.

“Cute as a bug,” he muttered in a rusty voice.

“Get out of here, Johnny!”

“Anyone would say I hit a nerve.”

“I don’t think I know you as well as I thought I did. Maybe I don’t know you at all.”

“I’m fighting for my life this time, Molly. It can make a difference.”

“Leave me alone for a while.”

He shrugged, gave her a strange, mocking smile, and strolled slowly to the door. He closed it gently behind him.

She stood in silence in a world less sane, less predictable and comfortable than it had been, and she had the feeling that she had lost some important fragment of her own identity. I am Molly Murdock, she told herself. Wife and mother. Part-time businesswoman, on the verge of permanent retirement. She felt like a victim of something she could not understand, and in her need to reaffirm herself, she went very quickly to the phone and put through a call to her husband in Vermont.

The operator said she would call her back in a few minutes. Molly paced restlessly, planning what she would say to Tom. She would tell him about it as though telling him some ludicrous joke. She would present it to him in such a way he would know she had no intention of accepting it.

But suddenly she found herself wishing with all her heart she could somehow phone Max Andro and tell him about it. Max was the only one who could have truly comprehended what a tremendous thing it was for Molly Murdock just to be made such an offer. Tom tried to understand her triumphs and disasters, but because he had no great interest in her workaday world, he could not evaluate the importance of the things that happened to her. If she told him Ross Hamilton wanted to send her to Mars on the first space ship built in Texas, Tom would merely try to detect her own reaction and then respond in the way he thought she might expect. The world seemed a meaner, smaller place with Max Andro out of it. She ached to hear the pride and pleasure he would never be able to express again.

She hurried to the phone when it began to ring.

“Mrs. Murdock? I have your party on the line, but it is a bad connection. I can’t seem to get a better one. Do you want to try it?”

“Yes.”

“Go ahead, please.”

“Tom?” she called. “Tom?” She listened to a windy whining, a roaring and humming, and heard his voice but could not understand what he said.

“Can you hear me, darling?” she called. “Can you hear me?”

“Hear you clearly.” His voice came from the depths of a cave close to the sea, and she could hear him in the lull between the waves.

“Darling, Mr. Hamilton has offered me a wonderful opportunity. I’m not going to take it. Can you hear me? I’m not going to take it. But it took my breath away to have him offer it. I’ll be coming back tomorrow night or Friday morning.”

She strained to hear him, and heard a vagueness and remoteness saying, “As you wish. Do as you wish.”

“What? I can’t hear you, dear.”

“Children are fine. Beautiful weather.”

“I love you!” she called, and wondered why it could have become such a cry of desperation.

“Whatever you decide—”

“Good-by,” she said, in her normal voice. “Good-by, darling,” she said, and hung up. She sat on the edge of the bed for a few lost moments before she realized the tears were running freely down her cheeks.

The phone rang. She picked it up.

John Quinn said, “Molly? I was a fool. Can I come back and apologize in person?”

“Of course, Johnny. Give me ten minutes.”

“You don’t sound like yourself.”

“Who am I?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Never mind, Johnny. I guess I have a problem of identity. Maybe it concerns you, and maybe it doesn’t. I’ll see you in ten minutes.”

There was a becoming shyness about him when she opened the door. He came in and stared at her, moistened his lips, and said, “You’ve been crying?”

“It’s never a secret, Johnny. It makes my eyes look like boiled beets.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”

“I was crying over a great number of things, Johnny. Maybe you can take credit for ten per cent.”

Then Quinn said, “You’ve got a good right hand, Molly. And I asked for it. I had no right to be nasty. If it hadn’t been for you, I wouldn’t be here, and Hamilton would never have made that offer. So it’s your party all the way. And your decision to make.” He turned and made himself a drink. “Just please understand why I had to try to rock you. For me, a chance like this is like finding a city made of solid gold. And for you, too, of course. But the difference is that I’ve been looking for it, and you’ve just stumbled across it.”

“I understand that.”

He sat beside her on the couch and put his drink on the coffee table. He looked down, studying his clenched fist, and said, “This would give me what I’m after, sooner than I ever hoped to achieve it. But it won’t work without you. You heard the man. I won’t get nasty again, Molly, but I want to plead with you, just a little. I’ve worked with you, and I’ve watched you. Molly, believe me, you enjoy all the little side effects and by-products of the wonderful job you’ve done with Andro. You relish being the fabulous Molly Murdock, who looks so delicately feminine and innocent and who has a mind like Univac and the instincts of a riverboat gambler.”

“My lust for power?” she asked.

“It’s a pleasure to be rewarded for doing something well. You know how this business is. If you quit now, inside of one year, people will have to think hard to remember your name or what you look like. Do you want that?”

“Why should I care, Johnny? Am I so insecure I have to have that kind of recognition?”

“I can’t argue that, and you know it. Maybe, from a completely mature point of view, you shouldn’t care. You shouldn’t give a damn. My point is that you do, and you are unwilling to admit it to yourself, because you feel there’s something sort of silly about it. Can’t you have the wrong image of yourself? A lot of people do, you know. Anyhow, let’s drop it for now.”

“Let’s try to, Johnny. I wish you didn’t come into it in any way. It would make it so much easier.” She glanced at him and saw the sudden brightness of his eyes, the look of speculation and hope. She laughed aloud. “You know me too well, don’t you?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t look so innocent. You are a clever fellow. I let you trap me into letting you know I’m not as positive as I was an hour ago.”

He took a deep breath and gave a long sigh. “I think of how it could be, honey, and I feel hollow as a drum.”

They sat in a silence that began to feel awkward. She thought of the faint voice of her husband, submerged in all that windy whining, and of the words he would not say to her. “He is not a demonstrative man,” she said in a small voice.

“Tom?”

“It used to be different. Quite different. We always used to know what the other was thinking.”

“Molly, dear.”

“It could all be lost anyway, no matter what I do.”

The tears came again, thick and slow and relentless. She bent forward and rested her head on her knees, her clenched fists against her eyes. One small, heartbreak sound escaped. She felt the comforting gentleness of his hand on her back and knew he had moved closer to her. His hand stroked her back, timidly, and then it tugged at her with mild insistence, and it seemed the most natural thing in the world for her to turn into his arms, sob against his throat, be held in strong comfort, feel the slight crustiness of the beard stubble on his lean jaw pressed against her temple.

Little by little, she felt everything changing for them, felt comfort and compassion turning into hunger. He shifted her and kissed the salty corner of her eye, and moved his lips down the curve of her cheek to her unresisting mouth. As the kiss progressed from tenderness to an almost brutal insistence, she heard a faraway clangor of alarm in the back streets of her spirit. Tom had always approached her gently, and she had responded to gentleness. Johnny Quinn, in his hunger, was bruisingly rough. She heard the rasp of his breathing and the thump of his heart, and she felt the grasping pressure of his strong hands.

This is cheapness, she thought. This sort of thing cannot happen to me. I am not this sort of woman. She strained against him with a burning mouth and a galloping turmoil of heart. This is from being lonely, she thought, and being in a strange place, and having that odd dream on the airplane. In a little while, I will make him stop. In just a little while. Pretty soon, I will make him stop. No harm will be done. None.

He forced her back, his mouth on hers. He fumbled with her dress. She heard a ripping sound. It seemed unimportant. She felt remote, dreamy, softly floating, deliciously helpless. Very soon now, she thought, I shall make him stop all this. But her thought seemed as far away as Tom’s voice had seemed on the telephone.

Tom’s voice?

Suddenly she began to fight Johnny, to push him away, saying in a smothered voice, “No! Please! Please don’t!”

He released her. His eyes were narrow and shiny. His dark hair was tousled. There were spots of color on his cheekbones. He was breathing rapidly, and his hands were trembling.

“We — can’t do this,” she whispered.

“Why not? What difference would it make? Nobody would have to know about it.”

“We’d know.”

“I’ve wanted you for a year, Molly. For a whole year.”

“No!”

“Don’t try to kid yourself, Molly.”

“Stop, Johnny. Please.”

He grinned at her. “Don’t be such a coward. We’re right for each other. And we’re going to be working together. So what difference would it make?”

“Working together?” she said in a faint voice.

“You know we are. You’ll find all the rationalizations you need. Tom doesn’t care. That’s what you have to face, sooner or later.”

She looked at his confident smile. She seemed to be in a humming place, on the verge of fainting, and his face seemed enormous, blotting out the whole world. “What difference would it make,” she whispered. Her mouth felt numbed. “What difference, indeed?”

And as he laughed aloud and reached for her, the phone began to ring. She got up quickly, teetered through a moment of dizziness, then went into the bedroom to take the call there.

“Hello?”

“Molly? Bless you, my darling! This is Ben.”

“Ben Hagerman! What in the world—”

“We got a wire from Tom.”

“Ben, I’m ashamed of myself. Truly ashamed. I completely forgot you’re right here at Texas Southern now.”

“We forgive you. Ginny and I have been aching to see both of you, but we’ll make do with one of you. I’m about six blocks from your hotel right now, and I’m under strict orders to pick you up and bring you out to the house, so if you have any important appointments with the local tycoons, tell them you are very sorry but old friends come first. I’ll be waiting for you in the lobby within five minutes, Molly.”

“But I—”

“No excuses,” he said, and hung up.

She turned and was startled to see Johnny Quinn smiling down at her, a fresh drink in his hand. He had taken off his jacket and loosened his tie. His shirt was very white in the first gloom of dusk.

“You’re so beautiful I’ve got stage fright,” he said.

“Johnny, please. I have to change. I’m going out.”

“Out! What kind of runaround—”

“Some very old and very good friends. She was a sorority sister of mine. Ben was an instructor at the same time Tom was. Tom wired them I’d be here. Really, Johnny, it would look very strange if I tried to get out of it.”

He looked angry and disappointed for a moment; then he managed to smile at her. “I see what you mean.” He put his hands on her shoulders and looked down into her eyes. “But we understand each other.”

“Do we, Johnny?”

He gave her a quick and strenuous kiss. “That answers your question.”

“Does it?”

“I’ll leave a light in the window. Hurry home, honey. Get a nice little headache and leave early.”

It was one of the strangest evenings of her life. Ben Hagerman — balding, rumpled, wry, full of wonderful, hesitant warmth — met her in the lobby, kissed her heartily on the cheek, and hurried her out to a shabby old station wagon parked half a block from the hotel.

“There must be some sinister secret,” he said, after he had yanked the car away from the curb. “More than being in the cosmetics industry, dear Molly. The years are leaving no mark. You could be one of my students. A pact with Lucifer?”

“Call me Doriana Gray. Ben, you are as bad a driver as ever.”

“And Ginny still keeps her eyes closed, and I still resent it. It’s good to see you, Miss Molly. So good.”

He drove her through the last edge of dusk to a small house on a small street between Brays Bayou and the Texas Southern campus. Ginny came running to hug Molly as she got out of the car, then to hold her at arm’s length and look at her in the glow of the porch light and say, “You look like a fashion model. How indecent of you! How unkind!” And hugged her again.

Ginny was plump, and there were wings of gray in her dark-brown hair. They went into the confusion of the child-worn house, where the youngest was doing a vastly inept job of feeding himself in his kitchen high chair and the five-year-old twins were engaged in mortal combat.

That first part of the evening was the warm part, the do-you-remember part, with genuine gaiety and laughter. It lasted through dinner, through the cooperative cleanup, and until they were settled in the living room-dense with books and records and prints and stacks of professional journals, with the lights low and the children asleep and red Mexican wine within reach. That was when the strangeness began. That was when the absence of Tom became a tangible thing. There was an empty chair he had never seen and certainly never sat in, but it seemed as if he had just left the room for a few moments.

She knew all the reasons it should be that way. Before they had married, and for many months after both marriages, there had been so many evenings of talk, that good speculative talk. They had solved all the weighty problems of Western civilization. The group of four had had a special balance, an interplay — Ben, the skeptic; Ginny, the poet; Tom, the mystic; and Molly, the idealist.

Molly soon realized that after all the do-you-remembers had been covered, Ben and Ginny were trying to steer the conversation into old patterns, alternately bringing up the sort of topic the four of them used to leap upon with gusto. But it wasn’t working. New topics were seized too eagerly. They listened with artificial avidity. They laughed too quickly. All the comments they made seemed too obvious. And each new topic died in its turn.

For a time, Molly thought it was all due to Tom’s absence, and then she was forced to admit to herself something she had been trying to conceal, out of her love for Ben and Ginny. Their observations seemed incurably adolescent, as though they had been trapped forever in the old years, when the four of them had been very young. Their opinions, though charming and witty, seemed to have no relationship to the real world. She had heard of this happening to old friendships. Ben and Ginny are as they used to be, she thought, and I have grown and changed, so that now this kind of talk seems artificial and boring and ever so slightly silly.

With this realization, she began to look at Ginny Hagerman in a different light, identifying her as the Molly who-might-have-been. The equation did not lend itself to any pat solution. She had to balance Ginny’s makeshift wardrobe and dire need of a hairdresser and shabby but comfortable home and her adolescent fascination with conversational abstractions against a love and a contentment and a closeness in her marriage that were as tangible in that small room as light and heat. A narrow world, but a cozy one indeed.

Just as she was feeling confident of her analysis, two of Ben’s graduate students dropped in — a big, dark, moody-looking boy named Sam Alston, and a frail little angel girl named Laura Lee Brewer. They had been walking and had seen the lights and decided to let Ben settle an argument they were having. They tried to leave at once when they saw the Hagermans had a guest, but Ben insisted they stay.

The argument concerned the validity of Heidegger’s analysis of Kierkegaard’s statements regarding primitive monotheism. Molly, because of what she had learned during the time she had been close to Tom’s work, was able to follow the thread of the argument for the first few minutes. Then suddenly they were beyond her range. She gave up and leaned back and looked toward Ginny, prepared to give her a conspiratorial wink, as one outsider to another. But she found Ginny following the discussion with great intensity. Soon, to Molly’s astonishment, Ginny made a fairly lengthy comment, which the others listened to and gravely accepted.

In that moment, Molly Murdock had to re-evaluate all that had gone before. There was nothing adolescent about this discussion. In all the previous talk, Ben and Ginny must have been simplifying, keeping the talk at an undemanding level; in effect, they had been patronizing her. The idea made her so furious she forced herself to smile, and she tried to recapture the gist of the discussion.

“On that point,” Sam Alston was saying, “I’ll go right back to Murdock’s original treatise on Barth.”

Ben gave a yelp of delight, grinned at Molly, and said, “See how Tom comes up as an authority?”

“What do you mean, sir?” Sam Alston said.

“This is Doctor Murdock’s wife,” Ben said. “I thought you realized that.”

“We didn’t!” Laura Lee said in a hushed voice.

The two young people stared at Molly, and she had the feeling they were seeing her for the first time. There was a curious awe, a reverence in their look, tinged with an almost imperceptible flavor of disapproval.

“Is Doctor Murdock in Houston?” Sam Alston asked, incredulity in his tone.

“He is in Vermont,” Molly said tartly. “With our children and three crates of reference works, writing a new book.”

“I never thought of him as being married,” Laura Lee said humbly. “He’s a very great man. I guess you know that. I guess you’re very proud of him.” She looked at her watch. “Sam, we really should go. Thanks for the wine, Doctor Hagerman, and for being a referee. Thank you, Mrs. Hagerman. And — it’s been an honor to meet you, Mrs. Murdock.”

Ben walked to the door with them and came back, smiling. “Sudden attack of stage fright,” he said. “They were aching to ask about the personal life of Doctor Thomas England Murdock, household god of all philosophy majors, but they didn’t have the nerve.”

Molly laughed. “A very great man! For goodness’ sake!” She laughed again, but stopped when she realized that neither Ben nor Ginny was laughing or even smiling. They were looking at her with distant, cool curiosity.

“All these things are relative, of course,” Ben said. “Greatness is an elusive word, at best. If you divorce it from public renown, which I think you have to, to retain a true balance, I guess I would apply it to Tom with at least as few reservations as I would apply it to twenty other contemporaries in all fields of knowledge.”

“You mean that, don’t you?” Molly said.

“For heaven’s sake!” Ginny said, “How can you be so—”

“Hold it, darling,” Ben said. “Molly would be the next to the last person to see Tom in any perspective. Tom would be the last, of course. Molly, my dear, all human knowledge is a great wall man has been building for centuries. We build it of the mortar of dusty research and of the great solid stones of original thought. Tom has put two and perhaps three stones in that wall, and they will endure as long as man endures. Man is the total of what he knows. So Tom has enriched the race. And of every hundred thousand people in this country, you will find just one who will recognize his name.”

“He thinks they are going to make him head of the department,” Molly said, with a certain defiance.

Ben made an ugly face and said, “Every bit of intellectual energy Tom spends on administration is a criminal waste. That’s one thing we’re very anxious to ask you about, Molly. There are any number of grants he could have, and all he would have to do is show a willingness to accept one of them.”

“Maybe,” Molly said weakly, “he just likes what he — I mean, I didn’t know. I didn’t have any idea he— You see, he doesn’t tell me very much any more.” Suddenly she understood one special thing about her marriage, something she should have known a long time ago. It was like shining a bitterly bright light into the dark and hidden places of her heart, cruelly exposing things that shamed her. She looked at Ben and Ginny and saw their concern — and their pity. She snapped the lid shut on painful things, sat up straight, gave them a dazzling smile, and said, “This is a sort of celebration, you know! I’ve been offered the most marvelous opportunity.”

And she began to talk. And talk. And talk. She would illumine for these academic peasants the shiny, wonderful world of reality, and so, with much animation, she opened all her glittering packages for them — the luncheon anecdotes; the special deals; the interplay of sponsors, talent, press agents, and columnists; the desperate infighting in the cosmetics industry; the struggles, the compromises, the bitternesses. She explained how the chance to have her own agency would catapult her right into the vortex of the endemic hurricane. Throughout the almost hysterical vehemence of her talk, she was aware of their stunned expressions, their mechanical smiles. She talked herself up out of her chair and, still talking, moved toward the door, saying, “It has been such a wonderful evening, and if you’ll drive me back to the hotel now, Ben, I’ll be very grateful, because I still have plotting and planning to do with my fellow conspirator, Johnny Quinn, a young man who is truly exciting to work with. You see, I—”

They had gone to the door with her. Ben was putting on his jacket. Ginny wore a bland social smile.

“You see, I just want to—” She stopped. Her mouth felt rigid under the pressure of her smile. She looked at her old and dear friends for a long second, and then her heart seemed to burst, and as the wild tears came and she clung, weak and shuddering, to Ginny’s comforting warmth, she found herself with the idiot thought that the last time she had cried three times in one day, she had been eleven years old and her dog had been run over.

Ginny made the living-room couch into a bed for her. Long after Ben had gone up, Ginny stayed with her, sitting on the floor beside the couch. The kitchen light cast a narrow beam into the dark room. They had given her a mild sedative and warm milk. She felt cozy and exhausted, all emotions spent. She kept drifting to the edge of dreams and coming back again.

Molly sighed and said, “It’s like skating.”

“Skating?” Ginny asked.

“When I was little and the ice froze on the pond. You could lie on your stomach and lick a little place to make it shiny and look down and see the weeds standing so still in that icy water down there, like a special secret world.”

“I know.”

“But when you skated, you saw only the ice. I’ve been skating for a long time. I guess I’m not making sense. Go to bed, Ginny. I’m all right now. I love you both. You’ve been so kind.”

“Phoo. Meat loaf, wine, and sympathy.”

“And a loan of pajamas.”

“The kids will have us both up awfully soon. So good-night, Molly-O.” Ginny stood up, kissed Molly on the temple, patted her shoulder, and went away. The kitchen light went off. The house was still.

Molly heard sirens far away in the summer night. A small girl licked a seeing-place on the sugary ice and looked down into the still darkness of the weedy world and tumbled slowly down and down...

Her taxi pulled up to the hotel at ten-thirty the next morning. She went to the suite. When she was dressing after her shower, the phone rang.

“You sound revoltingly joyful,” John Quinn said.

“It’s a pretty morning in Texas.”

“Is it? I haven’t looked. Where were you?”

“Visiting friends.”

“I sat there like an idiot and partook of too much of those free drinks and watched television until my eyes gave out, and then I sacked out on that couch. The maid woke me up when she came in at nine. I think the situation baffled her. I know it baffled me.”

“Poor Johnny.”

“Have you had breakfast?”

“Long ago. Have you?”

“Not yet. Shall I come and—”

“Suppose you go down and have breakfast. I’ll join you for coffee. And please get over the grumps.”

“I shall be jolly. Ho ho ho,” he said bitterly, and hung up.

He saw her as she came across the dining room. He got up quickly, to smile warmly at her and say. “Good-morning, lovely darling,” and hold her chair and lean over it to kiss her cheek before going back to his place. He looked across the table at her and said, “You’re so beautiful, Molly, I have to forgive you. But you owe me a full report.”

“They’re dear old friends. We just talked and talked until it was really too late to ask Ben to drive me back here.”

“Houston has taxis, I’ve heard.”

“But if I’d tried to get a taxi, he’d have insisted on driving me in. You know how those things are.”

“It’s the little courtesies that count. Thoughtfulness.” He leaned closer to her and, with slightly hooded eyes and a deeper, more personal intonation, said, “Darling, you can tell me you got a little timid. About us. I’d understand. You know I’d understand.”

She gave him the same smile of delight and approval with which one awards a child for a perfect recitation. “And I couldn’t trust myself? Isn’t that how it goes?”

“What’s so funny?”

“We’re funny, Johnny. We’re hilarious.”

“What happened to you last night?”

The waiter brought a pot of coffee. As he walked away, Molly smiled at John Quinn and said, “Last night, we peered through the ice and talked of great men. I slept on a couch in borrowed pajamas and was roused by urchins as the sun came up.”

“What happened to your hand?” She looked at the red streak on the back of her right hand. “Wound stripe for a housewife. Their youngest took a wild grab at the handle of the frying pan, and I got it before he spattered himself with hot grease.”

“Sounds terribly homey,” he said. “Oh, it was! Johnny Quinn, while I was taking my shower this morning, I thought up a question to ask you.”

“Ask me anything, Molly darling.”

She watched him closely and said, “Will you divorce Cathy and marry me?”

It looked to her as if he stopped breathing. His eyes became very watchful, and he sucked his lips thin and bloodless. “As a condition for what?”

She shrugged. “Just for the sake of having me as a wife.”

“I have a wife.”

“Wouldn’t I make you a good wife?”

“Molly, I don’t know what you’re trying to do to me. I don’t know what kind of game this is. What would be the point in our marrying each other? It would be an ugly mess. Two sets of kids involved. And it would just about kill Cathy.”

“Divorcing Tom wouldn’t kill me?”

“It’s not the same thing, and you know it, Molly. Her whole life is built around me. She gives everything to the marriage.”

“Is that such a good bargain for her? To give everything and not even get fidelity?”

“She’ll never know about us.”

“And what she doesn’t know will keep her happy?”

“That’s one way to put it. Yes.”

“So you would absolutely refuse to divorce her?”

“Put it this way,” he said cautiously. “I would be — very reluctant to divorce her.”

“Suppose I made it a condition of this partnership Hamilton wants to set up for us? Suppose I said to you that it will be done my way, all the way, or not at all?”

For a moment, his mouth looked soft and afraid. He looked beyond her, and finally sighed and said, “The question is hypothetical, isn’t it?”

“Maybe it is. Maybe it isn’t.”

“Why are you being so rough?”

“I’m just learning things by asking questions, Johnny.”

“Let me put it this way. If you should insist, if you should force me to make such a — stupid bargain with you, yes. I would cut Cathy loose and feel like a heel for the rest of my life, probably.”

“But you would cut her loose, dear. Would I be such a bad bargain?”

“Maybe you wouldn’t put much effort into marriage, Molly, but I’m more interested in what you’d contribute to Quinn-Murdock.” He stared at her. “Do you really want to make that kind of deal with me?”

“No. No, thanks.”

He looked greatly relieved, and then he was suddenly angry. “Then why did you pull such a miserable stunt on me?”

“Perhaps it wasn’t fair.”

“Fair? Don’t you know you’ve taken something away from me I didn’t want to lose? Do you have any idea how I feel right now?”

“Don’t try to touch my heart, Johnny. If you’re capable of selling Cathy, it’s just as well you should know about it. You didn’t suddenly become capable of it, you know.”

“What are you trying to do to me?”

“I’m trying to do something for myself, Johnny. Something overdue.”

“This kind of talk doesn’t pay the bills. And it makes me uncomfortable. Let’s get this show on the road, Molly. We’ve got to have something specific to show Ross Hamilton.”

As he signed the check, she finished her coffee and stood up. In the lobby, the bell captain came up to them and said, “Your cab is waiting, Mrs. Murdock, and your bags are in the cab. If you leave now, you should make it comfortably.”

She thanked him and gave him the money she had ready for him.

“Where are you going?” John Quinn asked vacantly.

“Vermont, my dear,” she said, and stood on tiptoe to kiss the cheek of his empty face. “Please thank Mr. Hamilton for everything. He flattered me, and so have you, Johnny. Make a strenuous pitch, and I think he might fix everything for you just the way you want it.” She hurried to her cab. As it pulled out, she heard Johnny calling to her. The cab slowed. “No. Please drive on. It’s nothing important,” she said.

On Saturday night, after the children were asleep, Tom and Molly Murdock walked, once again, through the orchard to the stone wall near the brook. It was a chill, still night, with most of a moon pasted high, dimming the stars. She wore wool slacks and a bulky old cardigan.

Tom worked each day with such total concentration that it took him a perceptible time, after he was through, to return to full awareness of the present. And these evening talks had become a ritualistic part of their rediscovery of each other. There was, Molly knew, no need for haste. There was enough time for them, enough time for her to learn more about this odd, withdrawn, durable, gifted man she loved.

She hitched to a comfortable place on the stone wall. “I hate to break this tempo by going back tomorrow, Tom, but I did promise them two more weeks — win, lose, or draw — and then I’m free of all of it.” She waited, but he made no response. She looked at him and saw slivers of moonlight on the lenses of his glasses. She wondered if this was the time to bring up the thing that most puzzled her. “Darling,” she said, “why is it that you never express an opinion at all about what you want me to do? You could tell me not to go back. I wouldn’t.”

“I suppose it’s a question of emotional ethics, Molly. I believe every human being is unique, valuable, and, in some deep essence, unknowable. So what sort of arrogance, what sort of selfishness would it be were I to demand that you order your life to suit my needs, comfort, and convenience?”

“But how can I know what you want unless you let me know?”

“What I want? But I want you to be happy. That’s what one wants for the woman he loves.”

“So I just have to guess the ways to make you happy?”

“It has to be a balance, Molly dear. It can’t be a marriage just for my benefit, or just for yours.”

She took his hand. “But you could have told me to stop working. You could have told me that my working was actually keeping you from accepting one of those grants Ben told me about. Darling, I think you have leaned way over backward on this. Doesn’t it occur to you that a woman requires a certain amount of domination?”

“I don’t think you do. I think you would have obeyed and put on a smiling face to hide a lot of resentment. Don’t you see, you had to put an end to it on your own terms. You had to make a deliberate shift in the direction in which you want to seek your satisfactions. That’s what every life is, you know, merely the balancing of satisfactions, weighing the long-term ones against the immediate ones, the meaningful ones against the silly ones that merely boost the ego or give sensory pleasure.”

“But, Tom, how about the terrible risk you took in letting me work things out my own way? I have developed a superficial part of my ability to such an extent I’ve got rusty on using the part of my mind that can comprehend the — the wonderful things you are doing.”

“Please don’t you dare get into that great-man routine again. It sets my teeth on edge and makes me feel like a pretentious idiot.”

“All right, darling. And how about the risk of my getting into cheap emotional things with another man, just because I wasn’t giving enough to marriage — and of course not getting enough from it? And what about the risk of losing me altogether in that business world I was in?”

“Max Andro and I talked about you one evening. I explained to him what I have told you. He called me a fool. I told him there was more to you than he realized and that you’d come to the end of it all by yourself, simply because it would leave too much of you unnourished and barren and restless.” He jumped down from the stone wall and stood facing her, his hands on her waist, looking up into her face. In a husky voice, he said, “I hide more than I should. I can’t help it. I sound so confident, don’t I? I sounded confident talking to Max, too. I wasn’t at all sure. Believe me, I can be happier with you being a part-time wife than I could be with all the devoted attentions of any other woman in the world. Now you’ve come back. I didn’t know you would. I could hope, that’s all. And you’re back because you want to be back. That’s what makes it such a glorious thing, Molly, such a miraculous thing.”

“Lift me down, and kiss me, please,” she said.

He lifted her down, with the rangy strength that astonished those who came up against it for the first time. And he kissed her in a way that opened her heart.

“And now,” she said, “could we please end my career on just one small note of male dominance?”

“What? Oh, of course. Don’t go back for that two more weeks. Understand?”

“Yes, dear. Of course, dear. Anything you say, dear. I’ll wire Charlie Marks some sort of excuse.”

“Like what?”

“I think I’ll just tell him I’ve got married again.”

They laughed together, disturbing a sleeping bird in an apple tree. The bird made a sullen sound of complaint. The brook mumbled. Crickets sang. The stars turned. Molly walked joyously, hand in hand with her husband, back through the orchard toward the dark farmhouse, feeling as if she had at last been cured of a small but lasting madness, and feeling as breathless as any bride.