Underestimated

Chapter 26

I fell right back into the comfortable routine with Dawson. He worked, came to my house for supper and slept in my bed. I had sidestepped the shower request my first night back. We made love in the pitch dark, and by the third day it was starting to fade. I was home free.

Dawson traded shifts with Matt the following Wednesday so that he could go to my doctor’s appointment with me. I stared out the window on the ride back to my house. I’m not sure how to describe the way that I as feeling. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy. I was just confused once again.

Dawson reached for my hand after nudging me with his. I looked down and placed my hand in his.

“Are you disappointed?” he asked with a warm smile.

“No. Not at all. Why would I be disappointed?”

“I don’t know. You seem distracted. Were you hoping for a girl?”

“No, not really. I’m fine with a little boy.”

Dawson’s smile reached his beautiful green eyes. “I am ecstatic for a little boy. I can’t wait to take him fishing,” he said, excited.

I couldn’t help but smile too. I could just see the three of us walking along the beach with a brown haired little boy riding on Dawson’s shoulders.

“Have you thought about names?” he asked.

“Not really. The only thing that I knew for sure was if it was a girl, her middle name was going to be Joyce like mine and Caroline’s”

“Wait. I thought your middle name was Michelle,” he stated, confused.

I smiled an uncertain smile.” Riley’s middle name is Michelle. Morgan’s middle name is Joyce.”

Dawson didn’t reply right away. He contemplated what I had just said, briefly before responding. “I can’t call you Morgan, Ry.”

I kind of giggled. “I don’t want you to call me Morgan.” I didn’t. I wasn’t Morgan with him. I was Morgan with Drew, and I wanted to keep the two separated.

We stopped at Star’s on the way through town and had one of her new club sandwiches. She now had two girls working for her plus the one that I had l already met. The place was hopping. Of course she had to let her new help know that they were working there because of me. I believed that myself though. I know that it wouldn’t have been any more than the run down coffee shop, had I not taken it up on myself to turn it into something unique.

By the time we made it back, I was tired and ready for my daily nap. I never realized how much being pregnant took out of you. I was tired all the time.

Dawson stopped me just in the door. He kissed me and told me that he loved me. He was as proud as an Olympian wearing a gold medal.

“I love you too,” I smiled up at him kissing him.

“I suppose you are heading straight to the couch,” he mused.

“That is exactly where I am heading,” I assured him. What I really wanted to do was call Drew. I told him that I would call as soon as I found out. I wondered if he even remembered. Maybe I wouldn’t call him. Yes. I would. The bastard asked if he could call and hadn’t called one time in almost a week.

I sat on the sofa and started to call my mom.

“Who are you calling?” Dawson asked.

“My mom. I told her I would call after we found out.”

Dawson knelt in front of me and kissed me again. “I’m going to my house for a bit and then to work. I’ll see you tonight,” he said.

“Okay, I’m going to lie on this couch and fall asleep to some tacky soap opera.”

He smiled and kissed me. “I’ll call you later. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

I had just gotten on the phone with my mom when I had a beep from Drew. Of course I had to take it right that second.

“I’ll call you back in a few minutes, mom. Drew is beeping.”

“Why? I thought you and Dawson were an item now. Have you filed for divorce?”

Okay. My mom and I hadn’t talked for years. I didn’t think she had the right to go there.

“We are. I will call you back,” I said. I wanted to get to Drew before he hung up.

“Hello,” I answered Drew.

“I’m having a boy aren’t I?”

“You’re an ass. I thought you were going to call me.”

“You told me I had to call during the day while Columbo was at work.”

“Who?”

“Never mind. You’re too young to know who that is.”

“I’m four years younger than you,” I reminded him, “and you didn’t call at all.”

“That’s because I don’t work that way. I have to have everything under my terms.”

“That’s why you’re an ass.”

Drew laughed. God I missed him.

“Are you going to tell me what I am having or not.”

“It’s a boy.”

“YES!” he exclaimed. “I knew it.”

I smiled. He was just as excited as Dawson was. I couldn’t help but wonder which one was going to be disappointed.

“Would you like a picture of him?”

“You mean an ultra sound picture?”

“Yes. It’s 3D and neat as hell. You can actually see his little tongue sticking out.”

“Hell yeah, I want to see. Do it now,” he demanded.

I laughed and went into the small office, scanned the picture, and sent it to his email.

“I just sent it,” I said.

“Got it. Holy shit, Morgan. That’s a real baby in there,” he stated the obvious.

“Um, yeah. What did you think was in there?” I asked, entertained by him.

“You can’t tell me that this kid isn’t mine. He looks just like me.”

I laughed. Although the picture was very vivid, you really couldn’t tell that yet. I tried.

“Fly home and spend a couple of days with me,” Drew requested.

“I am home,” I assured him.

“No. No, you’re not home. This is your home. I wish you would hurry up and realize that so that I could stop missing you.”

I smiled. I would love to jump on a plane and go spend a few days with him, but I couldn’t do that. I had already had sex with him on two different occasions while Dawson patiently waited on me to come back to him.

I liked the fact that he missed me. Why? I didn’t know. I was just weaving tangled webs for myself. I seemed to be an expert at that.

“I’m sure that Celeste is keeping you occupied,” I stated.

“It really bothers you to think that I am having sex with Celeste, doesn’t it? What bothers you Morgan? Is it the image of her bent over my knee or is it the thought of me giving it to her up the ass?”

“You’re a son of a bitch. Are you doing those things with her?” I had to ask.

He laughed. “Are you doing those things with Dawson?” he answered my question with a question.

I had to laugh at that. “Um…No. Dawson isn’t that type.”

“So you still just have a boring sex life. I thought for sure you would have taught him a thing or two by now. What do you do, just the plain old missionary position?”

“This baby doesn’t quite let us do that,” I stated. I didn’t want to talk about my sex life with Dawson. I wanted to know what he was doing with Celeste. “Answer my question.”

“No. I’m going to let you think whatever you want, and I will continue to think whatever I want about you having boring sex with Dawson, and don’t call me an ass or a son of a bitch either,” he added. He wasn’t going to tell me. That told me that he was doing it with Celeste. Bitch.

I stayed on the phone for over an hour with Drew. It soon became the norm. He would call every day around ten in the morning. I would email or text him when I knew that Dawson was off and would be at my house. Believe it or not, he didn’t call when he was there. This went on for almost a month until I couldn’t take it a second longer. I had to see him. I did feel bad for betraying Dawson, but in all honesty I had been illuminating him all along. He wouldn’t have liked my daily conversations with Drew.

My plan almost didn’t work. I told him that I was going to visit my mom for a few days. He wanted to come with me.

“I want you there,” I lied. “I just don’t think I should give that impression to Caroline. She has already met Drew, and she knows that he is my husband,” I explained.

“Are you ever going to divorce him, Ry?” he asked. I could tell that he was getting annoyed with the whole concept of me not filing for divorce yet. I was getting annoyed with him for constantly bringing it up.

I rolled my eyes and removed my legs strung across his on the sofa.

“I take that as a no,” he called to my back as I walked away.

“We have this same conversation over and over. I’ve told you that I intend to divorce him. I don’t see what the big deal is. I’m here with you, aren’t I?”

“The big deal is, I don’t want to continue to go to bed with someone that has another man’s name, and I sure as hell don’t want that son of bitch’s name on my son’s birth certificate.”

“You know, Daw, he might not be your son.” Shit. I didn’t want to say that out loud.

“Is that what you’re waiting on, Ry? Do you need to see if he comes out looking like him before you commit to me?”

“No. I didn’t mean it that way. Can we just go to bed?” I asked, not wanting to discuss this for the one hundredth time.

“Yeah, sure,” he unemotionally replied.

I was a nervous wreck waiting for Gary to pick me up. I didn’t want Dawson to run by my house, which he often did during the day, just to check on me. I was terrified that he was going to show up while Gary was picking me up. I had told him that Star was driving me to the airport. She agreed to go along with me if Dawson asked, but refused to listen to any of the details. She didn’t want to know what I was doing, but at least she didn’t judge me the way Lauren did. Lauren and I had an understanding. She didn’t like the fact that I kept Drew at arm’s length, and I didn’t give her any unneeded information. I would have loved to have been able to talk to her, but I knew how she felt. She felt the same way that everyone felt. I had no one to talk to about it, so I kept my little secret a secret.

I slept most of the flight. I was doing that quite a bit it seemed.

The warm weather was refreshing. I loved this time of year in Vegas. Unlike Maine, November in Las Vegas was comfortable. It had been forty one degrees when I got on the plane. The seventy four degree temperature when I got off felt like a breath of fresh air.

I was a little mad that Drew wasn’t there to pick me up himself, after begging me for a month to come and see him. Gary drove me to the house. I was even madder when he wasn’t at the house either. Marta had a snack waiting for me when I arrived. I ate about half of my sandwich and text him.

“Where the hell are you?”

“Calm down. I’m almost there. I had an unexpected meeting. Don’t go upstairs until I get there.”

“Why?”

“Because I said so.”

I couldn’t even finish my sandwich. For one thing I wanted to know why I couldn’t go upstairs, and I could hardly wait to see him. I walked out to the front and sat down on the concrete step. I know that I only waited for about five minutes, but it seemed like at least an hour.

Drew got out wearing the grin that I loved. He was wearing his customary expensive suit and tie, but damn did he ever look hot. We weren’t even supposed to be together. I was in a relationship with Dawson, and I presumed that he was doing Celeste. I didn’t care at that moment. I wanted in his arms.

“Hey gorgeous,” He said, taking me in his arms.

“Hi. Why can’t I go upstairs?”

Drew laughed. I lost my happy smile when I saw Celeste standing behind the car carrying a stack of folders. She smiled at me, and I gave her a fake smile back.

“Why is she here?” I quietly asked.

“She’s got work to do. Stop it,” he demanded, kissing me on my forehead. I grumbled a quiet throat noise.

Drew pulled me inside. We went into his office with Celeste first. I sat there with my arms crossed while he went over some numbers that were throwing a red flag or something. I was trying not to pay attention. I didn’t care. He was explaining what he wanted her to do when I got up to walk out. I didn’t come all that way to listen to him conduct business. Drew grabbed my arm before I had a chance to escape, giving me a look to be still. He stood behind Celeste and pointed to some sort of graph on the computer. His eyes were boring into me. I wanted her to leave so that I could get him naked. He was already driving me crazy, and I had just gotten there.

“I’ve got it. Go spend some time with your wife,” Celeste animatedly told him, waving him out.

“Okay. Show me what you bought me,” I demanded once he had shut the office door.

“I didn’t buy you anything,” he assured me as he turned me to the wall. He held my hands above my head and kissed me like he really did miss me.

“Damn. What was that for?” I panted.

“That was for making me miss you like crazy.”

He took my hand and I followed him upstairs. I didn’t quite know what to say when he opened the bedroom door that had hardly been used, not while I was there anyway. It was the room right beside mine, only my room wasn’t there anymore. The wall had been knocked out, and the massive room had been remodeled into a beautiful master suite. My private bath had been transformed into a beautiful retreat. The new tan stone flowed from the floor into the walk-in shower with six shower heads, a full size bench and a full length mirror.

The king size platform bed was sleek with black and gold satin bedding. I walked over and moved the matching curtains to a full walk out deck with comfortable chairs. It was absolutely gorgeous. I just wasn’t sure what he expected me to say. I had Dawson.

“Open the pocket doors,” he excitedly told me.

I’m sure my face was blank. I was so confused. What the hell had he done? I opened the pocket doors to the most beautiful nursery that I had ever seen. The crib itself must have cost a fortune. It was custom made to look like a tree house. The branches came out for practical uses. One branch held the changing table to the right of the crib. one branch was full of newborn baby boy’s clothing. There was another branch that had an automatic baby swing. The last branch came over the top of the crib and held a mobile, which I was sure was also custom made. It held diamonds that sent a sparkle across the walls and ceiling when Drew wound it up. The whole room was decorated like an enchanted forest. The hand painted mural on one of the walls showed a vibrant forest with baby monkeys in a couple of the trees.

“Drew?” I quietly said. What did he want me to say?

“You love it, don’t you?” he smiled.

“I do. I’m just not sure what to say. You do remember that this baby may not be yours. Right?”

“No. I don’t believe that for a second,” he replied, taking me in his arms. “I believe one hundred percent that this is my son,” he said, placing his hand on my stomach. “And I believe that you are going to wake up and realize that I love you, and I want to wake up to the smell of your peach smelling hair every morning.”

Shit…

Drew led me back to what he believed would be our master bedroom and made slow passionate love to me. It was just what I needed. I needed the distraction. Something bad was going to happen. I could feel it. I had to hurt someone, and for the love of God, I didn’t know who that someone was going to be.

We lay naked, entwined in each other’s arms in the middle of the day. Drew told me about the construction going on for the past couple of months. He explained the hours that he spent picking out the bed and décor for the baby’s room. I thought it was the sweetest thing ever.

“Have you thought about what we’re going to call this little guy?” Drew asked.

“Not really. Dawson likes Brady.” Damnit. I didn’t want to say that. It just fell out of my mouth.

“Brady is a sissy name, and he doesn’t have a say in what my son’s name is going to be.” He said it with a little bit of attitude.

“Did you have something in mind?” I asked, trying to smooth over my idiotic statement.

“I kind of like Nicholas. Nicholas Andrew Kelley,” he replied.

“I like it, but why Nicholas?”

“I know I’m supposed to tell you some off the wall story about Nicholas being my hero or some shit, but I don’t have one. I just like the name.”

I smiled and rolled over to my side so that I could kiss him.

“Tell me that you love me,” he said to my lips.

“I do love you, Drew,” I said to his.

“Then come home. I’m begging you.”

I wanted to tell him yes that I would, but I just couldn’t do it. I had Dawson who was under the assumption that I was visiting my mother on the other side of the United States. Maybe coming here wasn’t such a good idea after all. All it did was confuse me even more.

“I’m working on it, but I can’t just say yes right this second,” I replied with the best answer that I could come up with.

“You’re waiting to see who the father is, aren’t you?”

Was that what I was doing?

“You don’t have to answer that. I know you have a lot going on, and I want you to know that I am not pressuring you. I want you to do what you want, and what you think is best for you, but you remember one thing. I want you more than I have ever wanted anything in my life. I want to spend the rest of my life making up for our first six years together.”

“They weren’t all bad,” I replied.

“Tell me when it was good,” he countered.

I couldn’t do that. Drew was a monster then. He never treated me with any dignity or respect. He loved to humiliate me and treat me like a piece of meat. What the hell was I doing in bed with this maniac? I should be at home getting ready to have supper with Dawson. I had to get up. I wanted away from Drew at that moment. I needed to stop remembering the past or this trip was going to turn into remorse and guilt, more than it already was.

“I’m going to take a shower,” I said not answering his question.

He let me go. I stood in front of the mirror looking shamefully at my reflection. I wondered if there were cameras in the newly remodeled shower. What the hell was I doing? What in the world was I thinking? I stayed in the hot shower for as long as I could, trying to wash away my shame. It didn’t work.

Drew was gone when I came out. I walked around the beautiful transformed room and then back to the baby’s room. I took in every little detail. He had really gone above and beyond. The room was a mother’s dream room. I sat in the gliding rocking chair and imagined myself holding my son as I rocked back and forth. I hadn’t even realized that I had fallen asleep until Drew woke me for supper.

I opened my eyes to sweet kisses on my eyelids and then my lips. I smiled. One minute I hated this man and the next, I couldn’t get enough of him. I wished there was a magic pill, a pill that would miraculously guide me in the right direction.

“You’re the most beautiful mother to be on earth,” he whispered.

“I fell asleep, didn’t I?”

“You did. I like the idea of you falling asleep rocking my son.”

“I was rocking him, wasn’t I?” I smiled, realizing that I was indeed rocking my son. I couldn’t say our son. I didn’t know whose son I was rocking. I didn’t know if I was rocking Brady Aaron Bade or Nicholas Andrew Kelly. I wasn’t sure that I could keep this up for three more months. I wished I knew.

“Are you hungry,” Drew asked, pulling me from my thoughts.

“I’m always hungry,” I assured him.

I spent four days being in total love with my husband. We laughed, went for walks, watched a football game at the nearby high school, made love countless times, and fell asleep naked in each other’s arms. I talked to Dawson every day and he never suspected a thing. I was supposed to stay for two more days, but Drew had to fly to New York. He begged me to go with him, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to be stuck in a hotel while he was out taking care of business. We made plans to meet at my mother’s in two weeks.

I spent the last night wrapped in his arms, dreading the thought of leaving him. Two weeks seemed like so far away. I drifted off to sleep after making love for the last time. I slept so soundly. I didn’t even know that I was dreaming. When I finally realized what was going on Drew had me in his arms, trying to wake me.

“Shhhh, you’re okay, I’ve got you,” he said, brushing my damp hair from my forehead.

“Dawson?” I whimpered, still incoherent. I felt him stiffen and then move off the bed.

Shit. It wasn’t Dawson.

“Drew?” I said to his dark silhouette.

He sat on the side of the bed and placed his head in his hands. I touched his arm, and he took my hand and brought it to his lips.

“You feel protected with him, don’t you?”

What? What the hell did I say?

“I feel protected with you too,” I tried.

“No, you don’t. You have no idea how it makes me feel when you wake up like that.”

“What did I say?”

He shook his head and breathed a deep breath.

“Tell me, Drew,” I demanded.

“You were begging me not to hit you again. You were promising not to be a bad girl and telling me that you would do what I wanted” he confessed.

Shit. Stupid nightmares.

“Drew, don’t, it’s okay.”

He jumped up. “It’s not okay, Morgan! I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve this baby. You don’t deserve me. You deserve someone like Dawson, someone that is going to respect and take care of you.”

“You know what, Drew? You are absolutely right,” I was getting angry with him. I didn’t want him to act like this when I knew that he was leaving me in a couple of hours. His head snapped toward me. “You don’t want me to bring up the past, then you’re not allowed to either. I love you, damnit. I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t.”

“Why?”

“I have no idea why. I have asked myself that same question a million times. I love you and I don’t want to lose you.”

“But you don’t want to lose Dawson either, right?” he asked, coming back to me. I didn’t want to lose Dawson. I loved him too. He was my safety net.

I didn’t answer. I couldn’t answer him. I didn’t know what to say. Nothing I could have said would have made any sense, not to him and not to me. I needed them both.

“You need to decide, Morgan. If you don’t want me, then tell me. Stop keeping me at bay. Either be with me or don’t. I can’t wait any longer. I have tried my best to give you time. I’ve given you almost six months. You have to choose, Morgan.”

I knew I had to choose. I didn’t want to choose. I wanted to keep them both in my life until I figured out who this baby’s dad was. Drew would never understand that. Dawson would never understand that. No matter what I decided, someone was going to get hurt. Why didn’t I just do the stupid paternity test?

“I can’t give you an answer right this second, Drew,” I said. I couldn’t. I knew that as soon as I was back in Dawson’s arms, I would be right back to thinking I needed him as much as I was feeling like I needed Drew when I was with him.

Drew lay back down and pulled me in his arms with a heavy sigh.

“I love you, Morgan,” he whispered.

“I love you too, Drew. I really do.”

Drew was gone when I woke. I knew he had to leave before daylight. I didn’t like it. I felt alone, sad, hurt, confused. I wanted him back. I wanted to be everywhere he was. I wanted Drew. I decided right that moment that I wanted Drew.

I walked up to our new master bedroom again before showering and getting ready to head back home to Maine, to Dawson. I smiled when I opened the baby’s room. I thumbed through the tiny infant clothing and wondered if Drew had picked them out. There was no way that he would ever wear all of them. There were at least twenty little sleepers. I picked up the tiny little tuxedo and smiled at the embroidery that read ‘Daddy’s little assistant.’

“Oh, Drew what am I going to do?” I said out loud to the empty room.

I smiled again when I read Drew’s text.

“You could start with coming home to me.”

There were cameras. I looked around the room and answered my phone.

“Where are you?” I asked as soon as I saw that it was Drew.

“Waiting for a client. You look good in there.”

“I can’t believe you put cameras in here.”

“You didn’t really think I was going to leave my baby in there all alone without being able to look at him whenever I wanted, did you?”

“No. I guess not,” I replied. Why did I feel so raw, so torn and undone?

“There is one right above the mobile. I can see him sleeping from anywhere.”

I smiled and looked around the room for a camera. “I’m going to take a shower. By any chance are there cameras in there too?” I asked.

“Of course,” he replied. I didn’t mind. I laughed and shook my head.

“Will you call me later?”

“You call me when you land.”

“I will. I love you, Drew.”

“I love you too, baby.”

I thought about calling Dawson, but changed my mind. One, I didn’t want Drew to know that I was calling him, and two, I wanted to surprise him. He wasn’t expecting me for two more days. I knew it would be later when I got home. I thought I would just show up at his house.

I showered and walked downstairs to wait for Gary. I opened Drew’s office door, and Celeste was sitting at Drew’s desk. I wasn’t expecting to see her there. I had assumed she was with Drew. She was on the phone barking orders. I thought she sounded a lot like Drew. I felt sorry for the person on the other end. She smiled and waved me inside. I didn’t really want to talk to her. I was just going to leave Drew a little note on his desk.

I listened while she talked.

“I don’t care. If I wanted your excuses, I would have asked for them. You take care of this, and you take care of it now. Do I make myself clear?”

Wow, she was beautiful and powerful. Was she doing my husband? That was the question that I wanted answered. I was sure that she was. She was gorgeous, strong, and proud. She was a female version of Drew.

“Sorry about that,” she smiled and sat in his chair once she hung up.

“Um, it’s okay. I was just going to leave Drew a note. I didn’t know you were here. I will just text him.” I wasn’t sure why, but I was intimidated by this women.

“Sit down, let’s talk.”

What the fuck? I didn’t want to talk to her. I didn’t even like her, and I sure as hell didn’t like her spending more time with my husband than I did.

I sat. Just like I would have had Drew told me to. I didn’t speak. I wasn’t about to speak first. I had no idea what to say to her. We had never even spoke before, other than the polite, hello, how are you?

“How’s the pregnancy coming?” she asked.

“Oh, moving right along,” I awkwardly replied.

She smiled. “Morgan, I hope you don’t think that there is anything going on between Drew and myself.”

What the hell? Did I make it obvious? I decided to be honest.

“I do worry about the two of you traveling and spending so much time together. Things happen,” I point blank told her. She laughed. The bitch laughed. I mean really laughed. She thought I was being silly. I could tell.

She stood and took her purse from the hook on the closet door. I wondered what she was doing when she pulled out a picture of the cutest little blonde haired boy ever.

“This is my son, Vincent,” she said. I smiled at the little guy. He was adorable and had her blonde hair and emerald green eyes. She was married. I hoped she was happily married, but still, even married people slipped.

“This is my companion,” she said handing me another picture of her, the little boy and another beautiful dark haired female.

Oh my God. She’s gay.

I looked up to her smiling down at me.

“I promise, nothing would ever happen between your husband and me. He’s not really my type,” she teased.

I smiled. That made me feel so much better.

“Does Drew know?”

“Yes, he knows. I told him on the very first interview.”

That bastard.

After talking to Celeste for almost an hour, I decided that I liked her. She even made me feel important when she answered the phone and told three different people that she was busy and would get back with them.

She didn’t ask too many questions, but I was sure that she was aware of our situation. She had to know. She knew that I was never around. I wondered how much Drew had disclosed. Did they talk? Did he confide in her?

Marta knocked on the door letting me know that Gary was there for me.

“Here, give me your phone,” Celeste, requested, standing.

I handed her my phone, and she programmed her number.” If you ever need anything, you give me a call. I am here if you need to talk.”

I smiled and thanked her. I wasn’t sure how to respond. I was a little shocked. I couldn’t believe that Celeste was gay. It was a load off of my mind, none the less. I hoped that she didn’t say anything to Drew about our talk. I was going to keep letting him think that I thought he was doing her.

Chapter 27

I wasn’t too excited about surprising Dawson anymore. It was almost eight before I was finally dropped off at my door. I was exhausted, my feet were killing me, and I was freezing. I wanted a hot bath and my bed. I would show up at the station the next day and surprise him. The only surprise that I cared about was how good my bed was going to feel.

I had just stepped out of the shower when my best, annoying friend came popping into the bathroom, calling my name.

I wrapped myself in a towel just in time.

“I thought you weren’t getting home until Friday,” Lauren said, dropping her flannel pants and pissing in my toilet.

“I decided to come home early,” I couldn’t even be mad at her. I missed her audacity. Only Lauren would unlock my door, burst into the bathroom while I was naked, and drop her pants in front of me.

“What?” I asked, wondering what the glare was all about.

“You were with Drew,” she demanded, following me out.

“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, sliding on a pair of panties and a night shirt.

“You’re an idiot, Ry. You have no idea how much that man loves you,” she stated.

“Yes. I’m sure I have a pretty good idea. What is your problem?”

“Did Drew give you the hickey?”

“What?” I hadn’t seen a hickey and had even showered in front of a full length mirror. It was all steamed over, but still.

“Yeah, right below your collarbone.”

I pulled my shirt out to look.

Fuck. Shit. Fuck. I’m going to kill him.

“Lauren, you can’t say anything to Dawson,” I all but begged.

“I can’t believe you, Riley. If you don’t want him, tell him. Stop letting him think that you are going to marry him, and he’s going to live happily ever after.”

“I do want that, Lauren,” I assured her.

“So, you’re going to divorce Drew now?”

Shit.

“Lauren, you have no idea what this is like for me.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. You’re right, Ry. I have no idea how hard it must be for you to keep two good looking men going. You poor little thing.”

“Don’t do this, Lauren. This is really none of your business.”

“You are absolutely right, Riley or Morgan or whatever the hell your name is. It is none of my business, but it is Dawson’s. Are you planning on telling him that you just spent the last three days fucking your husband?”

“Really, Lauren?” I was speechless. I didn’t know what to say. She was pissed.

“Yeah, Ry. Really?” she replied and left me standing dumbstruck in my room.

I pulled my covers back and crawled into bed with my cellphone.

“You stupid son of bitch,” I yelled as soon as Drew answered.

“Why am I a stupid son of a bitch now?” he asked.

“You know why. I can’t believe you did this again. My best friend just stormed out of here pissed as hell because you had to go and leave your mark again. What the hell is wrong with you?”

“You didn’t mind last night while I was doing it.”

“I hate you, Drew Kelly,” I stated. I did hate him. I was sick of him swooping in and out of my life and screwing everything up.

“That’s too bad because I love the shit out of you.”

“It’s not funny, Drew,” I pouted.

“I’m sorry.”

“You are not, you’re…whoa,” I stopped when the baby’s foot almost came out of my stomach.

“What’s wrong, Morgan?” Drew asked alarmed.

“Nothing, the baby just kicked me.”

“That’s because he is pissed off at you.”

“No. He’s pissed off at you for upsetting me.”

“No. He’s pissed off at you because you are making me miss it all. You should be in my bed, and my hand should be right there.”

Well, shit…

I was at my wits end. I couldn’t take either one of these men anymore. I needed to get away. I needed a break. My daily talks with Drew, sneaking off to meet him, lying to Dawson, Lauren thinking any of it was her business, I couldn’t take it. I was going to lose my mind if I didn’t decide on one of my men soon.

I stayed on the phone with Drew until almost eleven. I couldn’t hold my eyes open for one more second when I finally told him I was falling asleep and would talk to him the next day.

Although I did sleep well, I felt like a horrible person when I woke. I felt bad for betraying Dawson, I felt bad for leading Drew on, I felt bad for being a bad friend to Lauren and I felt bad for having Star lie for me.

I got up, dressed and headed into town. My first stop was to see Star. I needed to talk to someone that wasn’t going to judge me.

We took our coffee and headed to her office.

“Talk to me,” Star said. She knew something was up.

“Star. Help me. I don’t know what to do, and I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up.”

She sipped her coffee and peered over her cup. I couldn’t read her. Was she mad at me too? She sighed and sat her cup down.

“What’s your heart telling you, Ry?”

“I don’t know,” I whined. I had decided just the day before that I wanted Drew, but now that I was back in Misty Bay, I wanted Dawson.

Star took a sheet of paper and drew a line down the middle. I snickered a little. I had watched Drew do this same Ben Franklin close so many times on different prospects. I knew what she was doing.

“This is Dawson, and this is Drew,” she explained, writing their names at the top. “Only pluses first,” she said. “Tell me one reason why you love Dawson,” she persuaded with her pen ready to begin.

I went through a long list of why’s. He was sweet, he loved me, he could read me like a book, he knew how I liked my tea, he was there for me when I needed him, he had never made me feel beneath him, I went on and on. Star had the whole side of the page filled. I could have probably thought of a few more, but I figured that was enough. She moved her pen just below Drew’s name and looked up to me waiting to start.

I snorted and sucked in a deep breath.

“Drew is so damn good in bed,” I said. Star smiled and wrote, great lover. “I can’t feel up a whole page with Drew, Star.” I told her honestly. “Drew drives me insane. Drew can push every button that I have. Drew makes me laugh when I feel like I am ready to fall apart, the sad part is, he doesn’t mean to. His scent, his lips, his eyes, his touch, they all drive me crazy. I wouldn’t say that is love, just something about him. Drew makes me want to swim with sharks. Dawson makes me realize the safer alternative.”

“Like what?” Star asked, she had stopped writing and was just listening now.

“Like feeding goldfish,” I laughed. It was the truth. Dawson made me rationalize before I did stupid things. Drew lived in the moment. Dawson would have never climbed up that rock wall, let alone had sex in the open universe.

“Can you talk to one more than the other?” she asked, tapping her pen on the desk in a slow tap, tap, tap, motion.

I thought for a second. “Not really. I mean, I guess I tend to keep silent more with Daw, I feel like I care about hurting his feeling more so than Drew. I don’t have a bit of problem telling Drew where to go. I don’t really talk to Dawson like that. He would never talk to me like that.”

“I see,” she replied.

“You see what?”

Star sat back and crossed her arms. “I think you know who you want to be with. I think you have known all along, and I think that you are afraid that the one person who could fix the pain is the one who caused it.”

“You think I should choose Drew?”

“I think you already have,” she spoke, honestly.

Fuck…

“But what if this baby turns out to be Dawson’s? It’s a very good possibility.”

“Cross that bridge when it gets here. I’m going to miss you,” Star said, like she knew that I was going to leave. I couldn’t speak. I didn’t know what to say. “You need to talk to Dawson, Ry.”

“I know,” I admitted. I just hated the thought of it. “I don’t want to hurt him, Star.”

“You’re hurting him more by sneaking around with your husband.”

“Maybe, if he knew, that is.”

“He knows, Ry.”

“What do you mean?”

“He talks to me. I shouldn’t say that he knows. He speculates.”

“You think he knows that I have been with Drew?”

Star nodded. I wanted to get back on the plane and get the hell out of dodge. I didn’t want to face him. Shit. He knew. What the hell was I supposed to say to him?

I hung around with Star until almost two. I knew that Dawson took his lunch from two to three and I had planned on meeting him and maybe going to Millie’s for lunch. I felt my nerves stand on end with every tick from the Indian wall clock above my head.

Star hugged me and told me to call her. I thanked her for being my friend and not judging me the way that my so called best friend, Lauren, had.

I pulled over to the curb when I saw Dawson walking down the sidewalk. I smiled a sad smile at the sight of him. I really didn’t want to hurt him any more than I had. I couldn’t believe that he knew that I wasn’t at my mom’s. He never mentioned it when I had talked to him the day before. I lost my smile pretty quick.

What the fuck?

I watched Lauren run up behind him and jump on his back. He carried her for a few steps before she slid off. They were laughing and flirting. Was this why Lauren was so interested in my plans with Dawson? I watched Dawson hold the door open at Millie’s for her. I couldn’t help but notice the look between the two as she passed.

I sat dumbfounded for a few minutes, trying to process what if anything was going on. Dawson didn’t have lunch with Lauren. They never hung out. How did I feel about it? That was when I knew exactly who I belonged with. I thought about how it made me feel to think of Dawson with someone else. I smiled and shook my head. I was okay with it. I thought about Drew being with someone else and how I wanted to scratch Celeste’s eyeballs out when I thought they were being intimate. I couldn’t handle the thought of Drew being with someone, but I was okay with Dawson being with my best friend.

I wondered about Joel, although I knew that Lauren had said she would never be serious with him. I really didn’t know that Lauren had feelings for Dawson. I guess I should have. She was very insistent on me not hurting him.

What should I do? Should I walk in? Should I wait until later? What did Lauren tell him about our fight? I wasn’t sure what I should do. I didn’t want to embarrass either one of them. I decided to wait until later in the evening. I wanted to talk to Lauren first. I could very well just be an innocent lunch, and I was reading more into it than I should have been.

I patiently waited for Lauren to get home, staring out the window. She pulled into her drive five hours later. I knew she wouldn’t come over like she normally did. She was pissed at me.

I took a deep breath and slid my arms through my coat. I didn’t even know what I was going to say. Was Lauren really seeing Dawson behind my back?

Lauren opened the door before I had a chance to knock.

“Can we talk?” I asked.

She stepped aside and gestured for me to come in.

“I just made coffee, want some?”

“Sure,” I said, sitting at the table. “Lauren, I’m sorry,” I blurted out even though I didn’t know what I was apologizing to her for.

“Me too, Ry. I just don’t want you to hurt Dawson. He is so in love with you.”

Hmm. How do I respond to that? She wasn’t going to mention having lunch with him. Should I? I decided to let it slide and pretend that I didn’t know.

“Why don’t you and Joel come over tonight?” I asked. I didn’t want her to come over with Joel. I wanted to spend the evening alone, talking to Dawson. I was just fishing for information.

“Joel and I broke up almost a month ago,” she stated.

“What happened? Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, playing the concerned friend.

“I came over to talk to you last night. We didn’t really talk.”

“Why did you break up?”

She shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know. I guess I have decided lately that I wasn’t getting any younger. Joel’s not really the settling down type. I want to be in love and start a family.”

“Got anyone in mind?”

She thought briefly before answering. “No, not really.”

She wasn’t going to tell me that she had lunch with Dawson, and she wasn’t going to tell me who she had in mind, but I could tell there was someone, and I had a good feeling that it was Dawson.

I answered my phone when I saw that it was Dawson.

“Where are you? I brought supper.”

“How did you know that I was home?” I asked. I knew Lauren had told him. I just wanted to see what his answer was.

“ESP, baby. Get over here. I’m hungry, and I miss you.”

I smiled. He wasn’t telling me either. “I’m coming.”

I stood up and took Lauren’s hand. “Come, let’s go eat.”

“No. I think I am just going to hang out here. You go ahead,” she said pulling her hand from mine.

“I thought you said you weren’t mad at me.”

“I’m not. I’m just not hungry. I had a big lunch.”

“Please,” I begged.

She groaned and got up. We walked across the yard, arm in arm. I knew I was being sly, but I couldn’t help it. I had to know.

Dawson was setting plates out on the table and getting spoons for the carton of mashed potatoes and corn. I went to the kitchen and got Lauren a plate and the butter for the biscuits. I watched the two of them exchange a glance. It was not my imagination. I know what I saw, and I know that Lauren quickly redirected her eyes.

I placed the utensils on the table and decided to try something else. I wrapped my arms around Dawson’s neck and kissed him.

“Hi,” I said as his hands moved around by ever growing body.

“Hi,” he said, and I kissed him again.

“I think I will just leave you two alone,” Lauren tried.

“No. I’m done. I promise,” I said, playing it off. “Sit.”

We ate the chicken, and I purposely touched Dawson every chance I got, just to observe Lauren’s reaction. It was obvious. She didn’t want me touching him. There was something going on. I knew it.

Lauren helped clean up the trash. I could tell that she wanted out of there. I kissed Dawson again in the kitchen, and that was it. She was gone.

“I’ll see you guys later,” she stated, not looking back.

“What’s her problem?” I asked Dawson.

He shrugged one shoulder. “She’s your friend,” he accused, like I should know better than him.

“Did you miss me?” I asked, moving into his arms. I don’t know what the hell I was doing. I guess I felt a little rejected or some shit. I had planned on telling him that I didn’t want to be with him and that I was going home to my husband. I didn’t feel that way anymore. I wanted Dawson, especially after realizing that Lauren wanted him too.

“Of course I missed you,” he assured me, pulling me into his arms. “How’s your family?”

Was he now fishing for information? “Good, I’m going back down in a couple of weeks. Caroline is in a school play and I promised her I would come and watch.”

I’m pretty sure he bought it. He kissed me, parting my lips with his tongue. I kissed him back and ran my hands along his ribs and to his strong back. I wanted him. I wanted him right that second. What the hell was wrong with me? I needed professional help or something.

Dawson tried to lift my shirt over my head. I stopped him. I hadn’t forgotten about the nice little surprise that Drew had left for me.

“I need a shower,” I whispered to his lips.

He placed his forehead on mine and took a deep breath. “Then you better get away from me and go,” he assured me.

I kissed him again and left him.

I prayed that he didn’t come into the bathroom. I think I showered quicker than I ever had in my life. I even dressed in record time.

Dawson was in my room emptying his pockets when I came out. He took clothes from his dedicated drawers and kissed me as he headed to the shower next.

Damnit he was staying. We were going to have sex. This was not the plan…at all.

I slipped on a pair of socks and eyed his cellphone, trying to tell myself not to do it. I had never looked through his phone. I never had a reason to. I jumped up and practically ran to it. I opened it up and went right to the messages. Fifty seven of them were to and from Lauren. I scanned them quickly, listening for the shower to shut off.

Most of them were just quick little text. Like, good morning, good night, how is your day going? And then I read where they were meeting. He knew that I was home the night before. Lauren had text him and told him not to come over because I was home.

Why was I so pissed about Dawson and Lauren? It wasn’t like I hadn’t just lied to him and spent the last few days with Drew. I was furious. I was reading one from Lauren, telling Dawson that she missed his lips and couldn’t wait until she could kiss him. I didn’t hear the water shut off, and I didn’t hear Dawson walk in.

I don’t know how I knew that he was standing there. I guess I just sensed his presence. I turned to see his tight lipped face staring right at me, going through his phone.

“Dawson?” I said. I needed to know. Screw the private investigator crap. I wanted to know, and he was going to tell me.

“I’ve wanted to tell you, Riley.”

“Tell me what?”

He didn’t speak. I could feel my heart beating. I could feel the blood pumping through my veins. I was ticked. I wanted to pick his gun up and shoot him in the head. I was literally seeing little light prisms. I was so freaking mad. I couldn’t see straight. Why, I wasn’t sure. I really had no right, but God damnit, this hit me like a ton of bricks. I wasn’t expecting this. I could have never seen this coming, not in a million years.

“How long has this been going on, Dawson?” I asked. I was trying my best to keep my cool. Never mind the fact that I was planning on dumping him that very night.

“Riley, come here,” he tried. Fuck that. He wasn’t touching me, ever.

“Just fucking tell me, Dawson,” I demanded, still trying not to yell.

“Come out here and sit down. I will put on some tea, and we will talk.”

I stormed past him shoving his phone in his chest. I didn’t want to sit. I couldn’t sit. I walked out to the cold November chill in my sock feet. I needed air. I needed the brisk cold sea air. I felt like I was suffocating, and I didn’t know why.

Dawson left me alone while he heated water. It was probably best that he did. When I finally cooled off, I walked back in and sat at the table. I shivered, freezing from the cold air.

“Do you love her?” I asked, looking down at the table. I didn’t want to see his face when I got my answer.

“I don’t know, Ry. Lauren has been there for me through all of this. We spent hours together when you were missing.”

“How sweet,” I smartly, replied.

“Not like that. We spent hours looking for you. You were gone almost five months before anything ever happened. We were only intimate twice before I found you.”

“Why didn’t you just leave me lost?”

“Because I love you. I still love you.”

“Do you want Lauren?”

“I don’t know how to answer that right now. I guess that is up to you.”

“Why would it be up to me?” I asked, turning to look at him.

He bought our teacups to the table and sat in front of me.

“If I thought for one second that you were going to divorce Drew and marry me and raise our family together, I wouldn’t want Lauren.”

“So, you are doing to her, what I have done to you.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you are putting her second because you feel obligated to make things work with me.”

“Is that what you have been doing, Riley?”

“Not on purpose, but I guess so. It’s always been Drew, Daw. I didn’t always realize that, but it’s a fact. We could have been happy had things not have happened the way that they did. If I wouldn’t have forgotten who I was and fallen in love with my husband for the first time, things may have been different. I do love you. You have been my safety blanket from day one.”

“You want out too, don’t you?”

“Yes. I didn’t go to my mother’s. I have been with Drew.”

“I kind of figured as much, and it wasn’t the first time. Was it”

I shook my head.

“What about the baby, Riley. If this is my kid, I want to be a part of his life.”

I smiled at him. I couldn’t help it. “I know, and I would never keep you from that. I would actually be a little relieved if I knew that Lauren was going to be the other female in his life.”

He smiled too. I think at that point we were both praying that this little boy wasn’t his.

“I’m glad that I had the opportunity to know and love you,” Dawson, quietly said.

I don’t know why that bothered me, but it did. I think because I knew he was at the place where he was telling me goodbye. I quickly swiped the escaped tear.

“Riley?” Dawson said, sadly, wanting me to look at him.

“I’m not Riley, Dawson. I’m Morgan.”

He smiled a weak smile. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Yes. I’ll be fine. I’ve been through worse. I’ll manage.”

“Yes you have, and I hope the rest of your life is full of nothing but happiness.”

I stood and walked toward the front door. I’d had enough for one night. I wanted Dawson to leave. “You can come and get your stuff whenever you want,” I said, placing my hand on the door knob.

Dawson removed my hand and pulled me toward him. He held me tight, and I was trying with all of my might not to cry. It didn’t work, and I let go. I cried in Dawson’s shirt for the last time.

He pulled away after a bit and held my face with his hands. He bent a little so that we were at level eye contact. “I love you, Riley, and don’t you ever think that I didn’t.”

“I love you too, Dawson. I swear I do.”

I closed the door behind him, feeling like I was closing the door on that fragment of my life. I knew it was over for good this time, and I was hurt. I wasn’t surprised, but I was definitely hurting. I wanted Drew. I didn’t call him though. I needed time first. I instead called my mom and cried to her for over an hour.

She didn’t speak and only listened until I was done sobbing and had cried out the last of my tears.

“Now that you are done, I think I should tell you something,” she finally spoke.

“No, Mom. I can’t deal with anymore tonight. I’m coming out there tomorrow. I can’t stay here. Save it for another day, please,” I begged. She didn’t.

“I understand, Morgan,” she began, ignoring my request. “Drew flew here when they picked up your car to bring it to you. I know everything, Morgan. I know how you spent your first six years. I know that you ran from him and acquired a new identity. I know that he took you from the hospital with the same intentions as the day he picked you up when you were eighteen.”

I was speechless. Drew told her everything. I couldn’t believe it. Why would he do that?

“I know that he hit you and God knows what else happened. I know what his assistant did to you, and I know it was all for money. He was angry that he had worked so hard on making sure that he was on that will, and you just happen to pop up out of the blue as the only living heir. But, you know what else, Morgan?”

I still couldn’t speak. I shook my head, like she could see.

“I know that man loves you more than his own life. I have never seen a grown man cry as much as he did when he confessed all of his sins to me. I can’t even judge him for putting a dollar before the happiness of another human being. I did the same thing. Maybe with different intentions, but none the less, I did the same thing.”

Drew cried? Drew didn’t cry. Drew wasn’t capable of crying.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“He made me promise not to. He said that he was going to step aside and let you decide on your own.”

I snickered. “He never stepped aside. The longest he ever made it was almost three weeks. He couldn’t stand not emailing or calling or even a text.”

“That’s because he loves you, baby.”

“What if our past always haunts us?”

“Are you afraid of him?”

“No. Not at all.”

“Then don’t let the past haunt you. Leave it in the past and move forward.”

“If this baby turns out to be Dawson’s it will undoubtedly complicate things.”

“I don’t think so. We talked about that too. He actually told me that he was glad that Dawson was there for you and that if it is his baby, he couldn’t have handpicked a better father figure.”

I couldn’t believe that it was almost midnight.

“I will let you go, mom. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was this late.”

“I’ve got all night, sweetie.”

“Thanks for listening, Mom.”

“You’re welcome, honey. I am always here for you, and I am so glad that you are back in my life, even if you are making me a grandma,” she teased. “I love you, Morgan.”

“I love you too.” I hadn’t said that to my mother in years. It felt good, and it felt good to talk to her. I was so thankful that she was there.

“Can I tell Caroline that you will be here tomorrow?”

I smiled. “Yes. I can’t wait to see her.”

“Goodnight, Morgan.”

“Goodnight, Mom.”

I lay awake for hours, thinking about my life. I was leaving Misty Bay. I couldn’t stay there. It would be too awkward, and not fair to Dawson and Lauren. Wow. Dawson and Lauren. I still couldn’t believe it. I had to talk to Lauren. I had to let her know that I wasn’t mad. I was happy that Dawson would have her, and I hoped that they lived happily ever after. I needed to get a hold of a realtor. No. I should wait. If this was Dawson’s son, I would want to be close by when he was visiting there. I might need to keep my house.

I’m not sure what time the exhaustion finally took over, and I slept, but I didn’t wake until almost nine. I got up and started packing right away. I had wanted to be on the road by seven. I was brushing my teeth when I heard my cellphone and ran to the kitchen to grab it.

“Shit!” I yelled when my pinky toe came in full contact with the wooden barstool leg.

“Hello,” I danced around answering Drew’s call.

“What’s wrong? Are you in labor?”

“No, you moron. I stubbed my toe trying to get to the phone, but it feels like labor.”

“I’m afraid you’re in for a rude awakening my love.”

I chuckled and sat on the stool, massaging my aching toe. “Are you home?”

“Not yet, getting ready to fly out. What are you doing? How’s my boy?”

“Your boy is fine, and I am packing to go to my mom’s.”

That was the first time that I ever said your boy. I had always rotated it back to my son and not either one of the two possible dads.

“I thought we were waiting a couple of weeks. You can’t have the plane until tomorrow.”

“I don’t want the plane. I have a very expensive BMW, sitting in my driveway.”

“Oh no, Morgan. Don’t you even think about it. You are not driving all the way to your mothers in your condition.”

“Drew, I’m pregnant, not crippled.”

“You’re not driving, Morgan.”

“Yeah, okay.”

“I mean it damnit. Listen to me for once in your life.”

I had to bite my tongue on that one.

“Did you call me to tell me what I can and can’t do?”

“Yes. Now listen to me, would you?”

“Yes.” I replied. I would just wait until we were off the phone and leave.

“I don’t think your sheriff is as smart as you think he is. I can’t believe he is going to let you get in your car and drive to North Carolina.”

“Dawson doesn’t tell me what to do. Only you do that.”

“If you take off in that car, I am going to beat your pregnant ass, and that’s a promise.”

“Hmm, I’m positively doing it now,” I teased.

“You’re a sick individual, Morgan Kelley.”

“You made me that way. Drew can I call you back in a little bit? Lauren is at my door.”

“Doesn’t Lauren just use her key and walk in?

“We kind of had a fight.”

“About what?”

“I will call you when she leaves.”

“Okay, but don’t you dare take off in that car.”

“I’ll call you back,” I replied, opening the door to Lauren’s weak smile.

I would call him back, just not until I was on the road.

“You’re not at work,” I stated the obvious.

“Nah, I’m sick,” Lauren smiled. I moved so that she could come in.

“You look sick,” I teased. “Do you want coffee?”

“You know I do.”

We were silent for a few minutes. Neither of us knew quite what to say.

I sat across from her, and it felt the exact same way it had the night before, when Dawson was sitting in her chair. I guess I wasn’t as mad, but I could sense the conversation we were about to have.

“Dawson told me that he told you everything last night.”

“Actually he didn’t. I figured it out on my own. I saw the two of you going into Millie’s yesterday. I knew right away. I have never seen you two like that together.”

“Riley, I’m so sorry. I never meant to fall in love with Dawson. You were gone. I didn’t think you would ever be back after all of those months. I thought you ran away again.”

I could see how she would think that. I had done it before, and she didn’t know the details behind it. For all she knew I was running from Dawson, after all we were about to be married.

“I’m not mad anymore, Lauren. I’m still shocked, I never saw this coming.”

“I almost left Misty Bay when you came back. I couldn’t stand seeing him with you anymore.”

“But you had Joel,” I said trying to understand.

“I did, but I never loved Joel. Joel was just a distraction.”

“You love Dawson?”

She nodded, spinning her cup in circles. “He had a really hard time when you disappeared, Ry. We spent hours looking for you. By the fifth month, we had gotten pretty close. We had gotten pizza and beer one night, and I guess we were both a little tipsy. Dawson kissed me and…”

“I don’t want to hear the details, Lauren,” I said cutting her off. I didn’t.

She nodded. “I was with him the night that he sat straight up in bed, remembering you telling him about Drew donating money to your school. I’m a horrible friend, Ry. I didn’t want him to find you by then.”

I smiled. “You’re not a horrible friend. You fell in love. And to a good man. I fell in love too, but it wasn’t with Dawson. I mean I loved Dawson. I still love Dawson, but it’s not the same kind of love that I feel for Drew. I was actually going to break his heart last night. I’m glad that he has you, Lauren, and if this baby turns out to be his, I’m glad that you will be the other female in his life.”

“You’re going back to Drew?”

“Eventually, I’m going to my mom’s for a while. I think I might have the baby there. She’s been out of my life for a good many years. I want to make up for that.”

“I’m going to miss you like crazy.”

I smiled. “I would say that you and Dawson can come and visit, but that might be a little too awkward.”

“Yeah, no doubt,” she agreed.

Lauren and I talked for two hours and a whole pot of coffee. I felt good after all of cards were laid out. I was surprised that Dawson hadn’t told her about why I had run from Drew the first time. Well, she didn’t act like she knew anyway. I was hugging her at the door when my unbelievable husband pulled up. I should have expected it. He was only in New York, extremely close to Maine when you owned a private jet.

Lauren and Drew exchanged greetings, and she headed across the yard, back to her own dwellings. I stared after her, sadly. I was going to miss her waking me up, and eating my food. She turned and smiled at me before disappearing into her house. I turned my attention to Drew.

“What’s going on?” Drew wanted to know, sensing the thick air.

“I was about to ask you the same thing,” I said, sliding into his arms. I missed him, I loved him, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life being his wife.

“I had to come and drive my obtuse wife to North Carolina because she is so damned hardheaded and difficult, and the most beautiful woman on earth,” he explained.

“You have to work,” I reminded him.

“Not really. I own the company, and I have a really good assistant.”

“I own the company, you kind of work for me,” I teased.

“In that case, may I please have a few days off so that I can spend the next fifteen hours trapped in a car with my wife?”

“Hmm, most definitely,” I replied, kissing him.